Professional Chefs Share Red Flags To Look For When Eating Out
[rebelmouse-image 18359015 is_animated_gif=Who doesn't love eating out (at restaurants)? The food is only one small part of the experience, and the atmosphere of the place often serves as a preview of how good your food will be. Is the place clean? Is the menu too big? Is there soap in the bathroom? Is the staff happy?
Yuckyporkfarts asked, Chefs, what red flags do you look for when you go out to eat?
Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.
Soda fountain spouts should be cleaned daily... if they're gross, sashay away.
[rebelmouse-image 18359016 is_animated_gif=I worked as a server and occasional line cook for several years.
Number 1 red flag is the spouts on the soda fountain. Those things are one of the easiest things to clean in the entire place, so if they're mildewy that kills my interest in eating there. I'm fine with a bit of mess elsewhere, especially in a high volume place since it will get messy over the course of the day. But those spouts take multiple days of no washing to get to a point where they are noticeably disgusting.
I've always appreciated when servers recommend what they like, rather than what's the most expensive. Expensive doesn't always mean better.
[rebelmouse-image 18359017 is_animated_gif=If your server recommends something that isn't the highest priced thing on the menu, appetizer or entree, you should probably get it. Your best bet it's their personal preference, but they eat that food daily, as do us cooks. And if we can eat it after weeks/months of cooking/serving it, it's probably worth your time.
It's an unwritten secret that not all food is cooked fresh... but you can taste when it's not.
[rebelmouse-image 18359019 is_animated_gif=Food comes out cold or dry you know they kept those until someone ordered it
Restaurants should smell... ok, they shouldn't smell, but if there is a smell, it should be pleasant.
[rebelmouse-image 18350672 is_animated_gif=I'm sure others have said this but the general smell. Not only can smell deter me from visiting a restaurant but the restaurant I work at recently had our pipes replaced and the dining room smelled of raw sewage for about 2 weeks. We lost a lot of business because of it.
Then again, if he's eating with cameras where you want to go, you might wanna go elsewhere. Or stay for the drama. Yeah, stay for the drama.
[rebelmouse-image 18359020 is_animated_gif=If I see Gordon Ramsay eating with a camera crew at the same restaurant I'm in, bye my guy.
Under-cooked meat can contain salmonella and other pathogens that are really unpleasant.
[rebelmouse-image 18359021 is_animated_gif=Food isn't the right temp.
Massive menus are confusing and overwhelming.
[rebelmouse-image 18359022 is_animated_gif=Massive menus. A good restaurant, specifically finer dining, will not crutch on a large menu but will have a consistent one - maybe a page or 2. Bigger menus usually mean that some items won't get ordered as often, and will have been likely sitting, especially if they're on the menu (i.e. lower cost).
Edit: Big menus can be very appropriate in context - such as those of ethnically specific restaurants. I've been to my share of Indian, Thai, and Japanese that had extensive menus, but expertly prepared dishes. This is most feasible though because a small number of ingredients are usually used in many dishes, such as rice or chicken.
Poor service means poor management, which could very well mean yucky food.
[rebelmouse-image 18359023 is_animated_gif=If the servers take 10+ min to greet the table when the restaurant isn't full, it has always been a poor experience overall. It tells me nobody is managing the entire restaurant correctly. And that carries over to food.
Dirty bathrooms, or unstocked bathrooms, are a deal breaker.
[rebelmouse-image 18359024 is_animated_gif=Bathrooms. If dirty or missing paper. GTFO. Same with dirty menus.
Edit: For clarification purposes, a dirty restaurant does not necessarily determine the quality and taste of the food you would be eating.
All I am saying is that your food will taste fine and there's a tiny chance of you getting sick due to the cleanliness of the restaurant/cook. Point of it is that the chef still has shit bacteria on their hand when they're handling your food. In reality, you are eating their poop.
Life Pro Tip: Washing hands properly. My only note on this that you should wash your hands for 30 seconds, not 20 seconds.
Also, recently when in the bathroom at my local grocery store, no soap, no paper towels. I brought it to the attention of the store manager and called the health inspector. Not a lot of businesses realize the nastiness of their facilities.
If the parking lot is empty, there's a reason.
[rebelmouse-image 18359025 is_animated_gif=A big one is definitely an empty parking lot during Lunch and Dinner. If the entire town is skipping out, you should too.
It's not a special if they have it every day. Makes me question the food overall.
[rebelmouse-image 18359026 is_animated_gif=If the daily special consists of items found in the standard menu it's probably not fresh and they're trying to get rid of old stock.
What's the old saying? Never trust a skinny chef? Ok, it's not absolute, but if they're thin AND sad, I ain't buyin'.
[rebelmouse-image 18359027 is_animated_gif=The great French chef Fernand Point left us some advice: "If I go somewhere new and the chef is very thin, I know my meal will be bad. If he is both thin and sad, I leave as quickly as possible."
I rely more on the sad thing than the thin thing. If I walk into a restaurant and I can feel sadness and anger from the staff, I leave.
Days-old fish? Bye.
[rebelmouse-image 18359028 is_animated_gif=Fish on the Sunday brunch menu. It got there Thursday and they are trying to get rid of it before it spoils. If the dish is fish with hollandaise DO NOT EAT IT!!! The fish is more than likely bad and they are hiding the smell with the hollandaise.
TIL cracks in plates hold germs and grit. So... not looking for that.
[rebelmouse-image 18359029 is_animated_gif=Plates with chips (large cracks) in them is a big indicator for me. Those chips host a lot of germs and if the restaurant isn't throwing them away, then they're probably lacking in other areas of food safety. (My mom was a chef)
Unless it's a truly unique special, it's probably... not that special.
[rebelmouse-image 18359030 is_animated_gif=I was a line cook for four years - "special" just means what we have a surplus of or is expiring soon.
Flies mean either a) filth or b) other pests.
[rebelmouse-image 18359032 is_animated_gif=I'm not a chef, but my mom is. She told me ANY flies in a closed restaurant is a really bad sign. She also said that really dim lighting can be bad if you are not at a really high-end restaurant.
Having soap in the bathroom is super basic and shouldn't be neglected. Gross.
[rebelmouse-image 18359033 is_animated_gif=I walk out of any restaurant if the soap dispenser in the bathroom is empty.
Workplace morale is a pretty good indicator of the type of experience you will have.
[rebelmouse-image 18345715 is_animated_gif=The attitudes of the waiters. If my waiter is demoralized and unfocused then there is a really high chance I'm going to have a bad experience. Either because of shitty service or a bad workplace culture that affects the quality of my food as well.
If nothing in plain sight gets wiped down, imagine what happens behind the scenes.
[rebelmouse-image 18350680 is_animated_gif=I work in hospitality and have for over 8 years. I say if the glass on the cabinets or windows have hand marks all over it and are gross, I'll tell you now that your food will be too.
We're all adults who are totally mature and don't, at all, giggle a little bit on the inside when someone talks about what conditions are like on Uranus.
Yeah just kidding, that's hilarious.
Uranus is our favorite heavenly body.
Reddit user rsideoson asked:
"What is a word that sounds inappropriate?"
Don't worry, Reddit is absolutely no more mature than we are and we all deserve a childish giggle every now and then.
Throat Thingy
"Uvula (dangly bit in your throat)"
- prettysouthernchick
"Ooohhh, so it's a girl house"
- Lusty_Argonian_Man
" 'All god's children got a uvula!'."
- theoldroadhog
"In Swedish it is called gomspene whick translates to pallet teet."
- nemeras
"That little dangly thing that’s hanging in the back of their throat?"
- Admirable-Door1724
Snl Season 47 GIF by Saturday Night LiveGiphyA What Hole ?
"Manhole"
- NightOnFuckMountain
"Our city has had several instances of exploding manholes in the downtown area. My friends never let an opportunity to make such comments pass them by. (And I love them for it!)"
- Needspoons
"Played some drawing game once where you'd draw the word u get by the game and others would try guess it...my friend got that word and drew a .. manhole..like.. a literal manhole not the actual one, and that was when i learned that word lol"
- chaexhun
Chew Works Too
"Masticate"
- HoopOnPoop
"Especially at the dinner table.."
- BassWingerC-137
"Those mukbangers masticate all over the place"
- imccompany
"This is the winner."
- the_pointy
"Do you oppose public mastication?"
- Cy41995
Hot Dog Eating GIF by NBAGiphyLets Just Not Use It Anymore
"This is not a fun or funny example, but, 'niggardly'."
"Etymologically, it has absolutely nothing to do with that other word. They have totally different origins, and sound/look similar purely as a matter of coincidence."
"But it's just not worth the explanation when "stingy" or 'miserly" work just as well, so it's basically a dead word."
- rejectednocomments
"Even the Reverend Jesse Jackson defended the use of this word."
"Also, TIL he's still alive."
- AtTheLeftThere
"I remember being a preteen and stepdad using this word. I was horrified. He was mildly racist so I wasn’t too surprised but we were in public. 'Dad!!!! There’s a black woman right there!!!'."
"He explained what it meant but I sure never ever used that word."
- baxbooch
"Yeah this word is gone forever. There is no way of tossing that out in casual conversation ever again, and even if you did you'd have to spend a good few minutes defending what you meant and looking it up to prove it."
- coombuyah26
Playing Around With Speed
"Fartlek."
"It's a running term and as a grown man I still giggle when I hear it."
- PreppyFinanceNerd
"Wait is that how it’s spelled? I always thought it was Fartlick lol"
- Hydra57
"You guys use that? It's Norwegian, meaning speed game."
- Cheetah_Hungry
"Fartlek’s were misery in high school XC. Always just called it a fart lick"
- silverhammer96
Safari Park Running GIF by San Diego ZooGiphyFortunella Sounds Fancier
"Kumquat"
- blaketyner
"You rang?"
- Sour_Kumquat
"Got banned from a forum for calling someone a kumquat. No regrets."
- eclecticsed
"The restaurant I worked at had a kumquat margarita and for a good 2 weeks the menu accidentally had cumquat, but each time the manager tried to fix it they’d accidentally print the wrong on again and there’d be too many copies to just throw out."
- silverhammer96
"That's a good one"
- TheKalebPerkins
The 'L' Is Important
"Caulk"
- HiakaiSiempre
"This may only be true in American English...in other accents it's much less suggestive"
- Tel-aran-rhiod
"Hehe caulk"
- MrsFlubberbuns96
"Don't wanna wait forever for that caulk to harden"
- Brilliant_Succotash1
"I used to work for a construction company doing purchasing and apparently in the winter caulk gets cold and refuses to work so you need to put your caulk in a caulk warmer"
- nmw6
"My brother insists on over enunciating the L so it sounds like. Cow-LK"
- jawshoeaw
homer simpson GIFGiphyYou Sure About This One?
"Jiggers, also known as the chigoe flea. Similarly, chiggers, also known as berry bugs."
- ArmoredArmadillo05
"Jigger is also the little double-ended cup bartenders use for measuring alcohol for cocktails."
- PromptCritical725
"I was looking for these two."
- kazeespada
" 'Jigger' is used every day by Australian surveyors. It’s what we call our theodolites or Total Stations. Short for thingamajigger perhaps. If my mate’s jigger wasn’t cooperating, he’d say 'jigger please'.”
- rawker86
"What’s my motherf*cking name?"
- GeezRick
So Many Botanical Puns
"Clematis"
- bl0ckplane
"One summer day at a barbecue at my mum in laws, she walked outside and announced “wait til you see the size of the flower on my clematis” I snort inhaled my wine"
- Hatchetface1705
"I think they can cure that with a penicillin shot/s"
- 51225
"Another botanical word that makes me giggle:"
"Peonies"
- RunningFromSatan
"Scabiosa. Or, as the Brits would say, scabious."
- Tacoma__Crow
This Is Another One We Should Maybe Not Use
"Negus. It means a hot drink of port, sugar, lemon, and spices, and it's a royal title."
- JustPlay94_cryer
"Can you use it in a sentence?"
- YubNub81
"Doesn't it also refer to an Ethiopian king?"
- Dbwasson
"Negan in Roman times."
" 'I am Negus! Thou shalt provide me with copious produce!'."
- imjb87
You heard (and laughed at) Reddits appropriately inappropriate words, now it's your turn to get in on the fun.
As much as people try to put on a good face in public, many of them have idiosyncratic behavior–like involuntary foot-tapping–they are ashamed of having.
Some folks, however, are not as self-aware.
These individuals could care less about other people and they act like the world is their nasty, unkempt, malodorous, living room.
Curious to hear examples of gross behavior, Redditor Dazzling_Age_4795 asked:
"What's the most disgusting bad habit?"
No one wants to see it, yet, here we are.
Leaving Evidence
"Taking a dump and then not flushing in public toilets."
– dynotrek
Splatterers
"I work in reception in a dental office, our Covid protocols included having wipe down the bathroom after each person. The amount of pee I’ve had to wipe off the seat and floor is absolutely disgusting. People are pigs- wipe the damn seat if your aim is that awful!!! They knew too, the intense stare down I gave them when exiting the bathroom, oh they knew."
–Reign_City
Lazy Pet Owners
"Dog poop ( living in holland ) drives me crazy how much is just lying around. Disguisting habit for dog owners to just not care to clean it up. Which is in fact mandatory but hey... if no one sees it, its not a crime."
– Syfodias
Turd Bombs
"People who don’t pick up their dog’s poop don’t deserve to have a dog. I also hate seeing bags of dog sh*t left on the ground. Like why bag it and just leave it there? It’s actually better for the environment if you don’t put it in the bag, lazy."
– lydviciousss
The Gross Collection
"Keeping your booger wall in plain sight where guests can see it."
– twodamntall
Orifice Buffet
"I once saw a person picking their ear and eating the wax. That sh*ts even worse then picking and eating out of your nose."
– Ddaveeh
Those without any concept of having respect for their environment are very telling of the type of person they are.
Trashing The Place
"littering."
– yParticle
"Those folk who buy cigarettes and casually walk around unwrapping and dropping plastic as they go... God I hate those guys."
– bishopsfinger
Driving Smokers Suck
"People smoking while driving seem to almost always throw their cigarette butt out the window without a care in the world."
–BridgeFantastic6458
And those who don't have any respect for others in public got majorly slammed.
Open Forum
"Not sure if it's a 'habit', per se, but those people that have their phones on speaker ALL THE WAY UP casually talking on the train, in the grocery store, and in restaurants. I do not want to hear about your mother's bunion."
– Pattimash
Hush, Please
"Dude for real. I go to the library every once in a while for some quiet time.. the number of people who talk on their phone is ridiculous. Half the time if you go up to them and ask if they could be quieter or take it to the lobby they act like you're the rude one."
–StupidGuy6969
Clogging The Shower
"Taking a sh*t in the shower and pushing it into the drain... I knew people who did that, safe to say I don't anymore."
– Chipmunk654
A Crappy Confession
"I’ve got to be honest, I farted once and a nugget, maybe the size of a pickled onion, fell out whilst I was taking a shower. As the particular bathroom I was in had the toilet in a separate room I decided the safest option for me was to squish the turd into the drain with my foot."
"I’m not proud but sometimes it has to be done."
"For clarity, I do not condone purposely dropping a full sh*t in the shower."
– User Deleted
Germy COVID Hands
"Not washing hands after using the bathroom, especially in public. Like at a restaurant."
– enigmaroboto
Look, I know we all have our quirks, but I'm just not a nail-chewing and booger-flicking stan.
It's not like people with these habits are deliberately trying to inconvenience my life. But...they are.
I don't need to be stepping on nail remnants and dried-up balls of nose mucus with my barefeet.
So, what gross habits and/or behavior really gets your blood boiling?
People have different levels of tolerance when it comes to profanity.
And some people can't stand the sound of rude or vulgar language so much that they can't bring themselves to say these naughty words themselves.
But when anyone reaches a high level of anger or frustration, they still might need a verbal outlet.
And instead find themselves coming up with an alternative word, which helps them release their anger, but won't offend any nearby ears.
Redditor No-Citron5628 was curious to hear people's favorite alternatives to curse words, leading them to ask:
"What is your best swear word alternative?"
Intergalactic profanity!
"Oh neptune."- StrappinYoungZiltoid
The last thing you want to find in your bed!
"Crumbs."- ThatsHisEagerFace44
Instead of rude, be educational!
“'Safety Hazard!'”
"I said this instead of… other words once when I tripped and accidentally taught this to my nephew."
"Now my sister sends me videos of my nephew saying it when things don’t go his way."- YellowForest4
Warning GIFGiphyThink of the children!
"Not sure of an actual word, but my bf and I have been trying to limit cursing since my toddler is becoming very verbal."
"He’s resorted to making very angry yelling caveman sounds when he wants to curse someone out rather than using the actual words."- Present-Lime-1244
With gravy?
"Biscuits!"- blargney
We can always learn a thing or two from the kids...
"A child in my class tries to swear but unintentionally says foot instead of f*ck."
"It's probably my favorite alternative."
"Wow, didn't expect this to get so much attention."
"Thank you for the award! "
"For those asking, he is a very tiny child with a deep yorkshire accent who actually picked up the word from another child but hasn't noticed he doesn't have the pronunciation quite right yet."
"Context wise though he's bang on which makes it even funnier."- sophishx
Just one word won't do!
"DO YOU SEE WHAT YOU GET, LARRY?!"
"DO YOU SEE WHAT YOU GET WHEN YOU FIND A STRANGER IN THE ALPS?!"- KevinBillyStinkwater
Be mindful, it could backfire
"When my son was little he started saying bastard so I kept saying custard."
"Until the day he complained that we were having bananas and bastard again."- CheeryShortarse
Doctor Who Snack GIF by BBC AmericaGiphyMother knows best.
"My mother always said, 'Curses!'"
"We, the kids, laugh about it all the time."- tenzip10-0
If you feel like you've sufficiently got your anger or frustration out of your system, your choice of words served their purpose.
Whether or not they would have to be bleeped out on network TV.
When we think of iconic movie quotes, there are several which come instantly to mind.
"Here's looking at you, kid."
"Love is never having to say you're sorry."
"I'm gonna make you an offer you can't refuse."
Appropriately, the ones that might haunt us the most, are those delivered by villains, who linger in our memories not only by their creepy attire and presence but by their devious choice of words.
Frightening us long after the credits stop rolling.
Redditor N_the_character was eager to hear what the Reddit community considered the best quotes from both Hollywood's legendary villains, as well as some lesser-known antagonists from film, TV, and video games, leading them to ask:
"What's the most bada** villain quote?"
Benedict from Last Action Hero
"Benedict to youg Danny in 'Last Action Hero':"
"I should tell you that I have killed people smarter and younger than you."- S-Markt
last action hero art GIF by xponentialdesignGiphyDonquixote Doflamingo
"Pirates are evil?"
"The Marines are righteous?"
"These terms have always changed throughout the course of history!"
"Kids who have never seen peace and kids who have never seen war have different values!"
"Those who stand at the top determine what's wrong and what's right!"
"This very place is neutral ground!"
"Justice will prevail, you say?"
"But of course it will!"
"Whoever wins this war becomes justice!"- TimeisaLie
The Man with the Midas Touch...
"Goldfinger after Bond says 'Do you expect me to talk?'
"'No, Mr. Bond, I expect you to die'."- Hunk_Studly
Interrupting GIF by James Bond 007GiphyThe Last Airbender's Azula
"Dai Li: 'You've beaten me at my own game'."
"Azula: 'Don't flatter yourself. You were never even a player'."- herculesmeowlligan
Inigo Montoya, watch out!
"'Good Heavens, are you still trying to win?'"
"-the six fingered man."
Video game villains shouldn't be forgotten, ask Ghaul
“'You are not brave, you’ve merely forgotten the fear of death'."
"'Allow me to reacquaint you'.”- KentuckyBourbon94
The Good, the Bad, and the one-liners
"'When you have to shoot, shoot'."
"'Don't talk'."
"Tuco, 'The Good, The Bad and The Ugly'."- jpablo680
Whiterose of Mr. Robot
“'Because Phillip, I had to ask you twice'.”- Lontano64
The final frontier indeed...
"'A true victory is to make your enemy see they were wrong to oppose you in the first place'."
"'To force them to acknowledge your greatness'."
"Gul Dukat, Deep Space Nine."- hamdingers
Deep Space Nine Dislike GIF by Star TrekGiphyA true villain will have you quaking in your boots with just one look.
But it's with their words that they really get you.
And how they instantly go from being merely villains, to legends.