People Share Their Most Embarrassing Injury Stories They've Had To Concoct Cover Stories For

Come closer... I'm going to tell you about my boyfriend's embarrassing injury - but shh, don't tell him I told you guys.
So - like ALL guys - dude can poop for forever. I don't understand male physiology. Why does it take 45 minutes to poop? I can only assume it's because we have kids and that's the only place we can get any peace and quiet.
Anyway, so one morning about a half hour into his traditional morning poop, he sends me a text that he's thrown his back out. Pooping. How that's even possible I may never know. It's not the X Games.
He waddled out of the bathroom grimacing in pain about ten minutes later. There was absolutely no way he could work, he could barely walk! Time for a convincing cover story; he told everyone he hurt himself moving furniture (we were just settling into a new place at the time, so it was totally believable.)
It took this man over a week to get over his poop injury.
Reddit user jcrewz asked:
Toast
I was once buttering toast with my face really close to it (I like my butter to be spread precisely) then I sneezed and slammed my head on the counter, effectively knocking myself out, and had to go to the ER to be treated for a concussion. I don't remember what I told them, but it definitely wasn't the truth.
Not Sure Which Is Worse
I was removing facial hair using a remover cream. I ended up leaving it on for too long which caused burns.
I told people I dropped hot noodles on my face.
"Knife Fight"
I have a 1.5" stab wound scar on my left bicep. When I was younger and attractive girls asked me how it happened, I would tell them it happened during a fight where someone pulled a knife on me.
Actually...I worked in a butcher shop of a market when I was in my late teens. Part of my job was to collect all the carving knives from the prep area, put into a large plastic bin, and carry them behind the deli case to the kitchen to wash. One time coming back out of the kitchen, I failed to notice that someone had opened the trap door to the basement, which was in my direct path.
The plastic bin of knives obscured my view.
I took one fateful step and tumbled into the basement, with the (very sharp) contents of the bin raining down around me.
Somehow I escaped with only a twisted ankle and the aforementioned stab wound in my arm for which I had to go to the ER for stitches. I'll always remember being dazed, sitting at the bottom of the stairs looking up and seeing a meat cleaver embedded in one of the steps.
- Thos19
Bowling Sucks
I once punched a bowling ball because I was frustrated. It turns out bowling balls are pretty hard. Broke my hand, it was swollen and bloody. Told my boss at work I slammed my hand in a door.
Its still broken, this was like 6 months ago.
- ecksit
Loving Yourself Too Hard
I dislocated my kneecap while masturbating. Lied and said I was falling off my bed when I woke up from a dream.
Bless You
Threw out my back sneezing, told people I was moving something heavy because that was less stupid than the truth.
- eDgAR
GOAL
Finally a story I can share!
I was playing football (soccer) with a bunch of friends (I was 12). Since we were all still schoolkids, one team was usually gonna steamroll the other. On this occasion, I happened to be the keeper on the winning team, so I had nothing to do and I was really bored.
I decided it was a good time to do some pull ups, and so I grabbed the crossbar of the goalpost, and pulled myself up. Once I was on top, I stuck out my legs for fun... And got them stuck in the net. I couldn't untangle my legs no matter how hard I tried.
I ended up falling to the ground, but I stuck out my hands to prevent myself from breaking my tailbone.
I eventually found out that I'd broken my left wrist, with one of the bones inside the wrist being pushed out of position and slightly fractured.
What I told my parents (and the doctor too) was that I was running after the ball, and tripped over something, thus causing me to fall face first and break my wrist.
- Yordama
Buzz Buzz
I broke my toe running from a bee.
I'm a huge weenie about stingy bugs, so when a bee got in my hair I freaked out. I ran toward the house, lost my balance, kicked the concrete step of mom's porch and fell backwards. Mom was sitting on the porch and I accidentally backhanded her before crashing to the ground. She was laughing so hard she couldn't help me up, and I was laughing so hard I couldn't get up.
I was super embarrassed for a while and just told everyone I tripped. I got over the shame because it was pretty funny, so I don't lie about it anymore.
Lord Sheldon And The Burrito
I was walking my dog, Lord Sheldon, in the park and I dropped my burrito on a rock in the creek, so I reached over to get it and I fell and dislocated my shoulder. I told all my coworkers that I was mugged in the park because they would never stop teasing me about it if I told the truth.
- BeAN_183
Comics Are Life
I was going to the bathroom and I was reading comic books. I was on the toilet for so long that my legs happened to fall asleep. As I was getting up I fell over with no use of my legs and broke my wrist. Told everyone I got in a fist fight.
Imitating The Cat
I said I broke my toe hitting it on the radiator, which wasn't a lie in itself. What I left out is I hit it on the radiator because I fell off my bed, which happened because I was trying to imitate my cat and see if I could lick my butt. I could not.
Tinnitus
I have bad tinnitus in my left ear. I tell people it's from firing rifles in the army without earplugs.
The real reason is I strained really really hard trying to poop when I was 13 and my ear popped. It's never been the same since.
- Blanb
Habaneros
The morning after the first time I spent the night with my now husband he made egg burritos for us for breakfast. We starting fooling around after eating and he hadn't washed his hands thoroughly enough to get the habanero (a kind of spicy pepper) off apparently.
After a couple days of still being in absolute misery in my vaginal area, I broke down and called my mom asking for the doctors number (I was 22). My mother offered to make the appointment for me and asked what was wrong. Instead of telling her I had slept with a stupid dude who injured my vagina in the worst way and I need to get a full STD screening while I'm at it, I told her I thought I had a yeast infection.
I had to wait two weeks for the appointment. I get to the check-in with the nurse and as soon as she says yeast infection I started crying, telling her what actually happened, why I lied, and she tells me not to worry, while trying to keep professional and not laughing. They did what they do and gave me a cream for my chemical burn and an antibiotic for a UTI.
I get home my mom sees my prescription cream, instantly freaks out and asks me what the hell happened. I come clean, she laughs hysterically. The moment my dad walks in the door she tells him, they both laugh hysterically. Nearly 10 years later, any chance they get they bring it up and laugh hysterically. Should have just stuck with the lie.
Sitting For Dinner
I once semi-dislocated my kneecap (in such a way that my leg locked up and I was in incredible pain) by sitting down to eat at the dinner table and twisting my leg somehow.
I hurt myself sitting down.
Instead I told my friends I had fallen down a steep hill on the local heathland, but my brother told them the truth and I was promptly mocked.
- TheBrokenSnake
R.I.P. Jicepy
I was around 15, messing around with a bunch of friends, and we found a stuffed toy monkey in the bushes. We decided to call it Jicepy and took some dumb pics with it. Then my friend decided to toss him into the trees.
Me, having grown attached to the plushie we had walked around town with for three hours, dunking in puddles and taking pictures of posed with beer bottles and half smoked cigarettes, decided to dive after this thing in an attempt to rescue him. The only thing I came back with was a torn open knee and a nasty scar....RIP Jicepy :(
I just tell people I got the scar from falling over in a pool lmao (I worked briefly cleaning out the drained pools for rescue seals, they were slippery) No one can learn I actually got it diving into the bushes shrieking to retrieve a small dirt covered plushie monkey.
Snuggles Gone Wrong
I once got a black eye from smothering my dog with love and hugs. I had my arms around her and my face pressed up against hers and when she heard the sounds of the neighborhood dogs, she jolted her head down and back up to break free of my embrace. Basically a blunt snout to my eye caused an almost immediate black eye to appear.
A very odd and difficult story to explain in passing at school, "Uhh, haha yeah... my dog gave me a black eye", so I lied and said I got in a fist fight.
Exacto
I had an exacto in my hand, but I was trying to move some plastic that I didnt want to cut/scratch, so I put the exacto in my back pocket. This is something I NEVER do. After moving the plastic, I see an exacto on the table I was working at, so I didn't think much of it and several minutes later I went to use the restroom. As I went to pull up my pants, I felt something slice my thigh open. The exacto was still in my pocket...and it took a fair chunk out of my thigh. Ended up needing 5 stitches...I didn't lie about it, but it's definitely the dumbest way I've hurt myself.
Military Hopscotch
The back of my left hand has a huge gash across it and two of my fingers don't have full range of motion anymore. I tell people its a scar from the military that I don't want to talk about.
Really, I was playing hopscotch in my Moms living room with my nieces. I back handed a light bulb. Passed out from blood loss, and woke up on the way to the ER.
Spinny Chair
Um, I broke my left shoulder last September, cause I got a chair that spins for the first time in my life. Wanted to play with it a bit so I tried to get on with my knees. Somehow, the leg that got on pushed the chair away and started creating a split, with my one leg pushing the chair away and the other being stationary on the ground. I fell and broke my left shoulder.
My story now is that I tripped and fell down the stairs. It sounds less embarrassing.
When Hoarders Recycle
I think this was 3.5 or 4.5 years ago. Mom and I were cleaning house on New Year's Day because her brother and his wife were going to come over. Mom, for the first time in more than ten years, cleaned out her desk (both of my parents are compulsive hoarders, my dad is also a compulsive shopper/spender, so this was an exciting development).
We were about done cleaning, so we gathered up the trash and headed down to the dumpster and were going to get right in the car to go buy some dinner. Mom is very much out of shape, so I trekked across the parking lot to the dumpsters while she cleaned the snow off the car.
I managed to get rid of the trash without trouble, but the recycling bins were blocked by some discarded appliances: a dishwasher, two mini-fridges, and a fridge/freezer combo. I was determined not to bring the paper back upstairs or to contribute further to the American waste problems. They'd clearly been there for a few days as they were completely covered in snow and ice. I eyed up the situation and decided that injury was likely.
Obviously I ignored my assessment. As a short person, I determined I would have to mount one of the mini-fridges and would not be able to just step OVER it (later discovered that my legs WERE just long enough to have done so). I set a foot atop the mini-fridge immediately next to the fridge-freezer and held the handle on the freezer door for stability's sake. As soon as I placed my weight on the mini-fridge, the snow and ice sitting on it slid right off and I fell backwards.
In my descent, the back of my head hit the round steel pipe that formed the top horizontal edge of the dumpster and I slid down the side of the dumpster. I thought for about five seconds that I'd gotten away with no injury as I have very thick, curly hair which was down and my hood was up. It turned out that I'd struck the dumpster hard enough to split my scalp (kind of like a crack in the flesh of a dropped watermelon) which being cut by a sharp edge of any kind.
Being a head wound, the two-inch scalp lac turned by hair almost completely red in about five minutes. We were planning to get dinner out by one of the nearest hospitals, so I waited until we got that far to decide if i wanted to go to urgent care or not. The bleeding had slowed by then, so I decided not to bother.
I had a headache for at least a week, was nauseated, had trouble sleeping, and obviously had a concussion (not my first). I wasn't able to take any meds for the first 36 hours because I only had ibuprofen at home and you should only take acetaminophen with a head injury.
Moral of the story, if you assess a situation and deem injury to be a likely outcome you will most likely be injured and it will suck.
- emmejm
Meatloaf Gravy
I have a gnarly 3rd degree burn scar on the inside of my upper arm.
What I've told people: accident with boiling water in the kitchen, I was moving a pot and the water splashed out when I moved too fast
The truth: after getting a Stouffer's meatloaf out of the microwave and peeling off the plastic, I placed it, still in the container on another plate, because it was too hot to carry. When I was walking it over to the table I jerked my arm (can't remember why) and it slipped and poured the hot gravy all over the inside of my upper arm. It's so embarrassing. I've only told a few people what really happened.
Untieing Shoes
Broke my wrist while untieing my shoes.
I did a weird jump to switch feet so I could untie the other shoe. Foot got caught, fell on my hand.
Usually I just say, "Yeah, Ive broken my wrist but that's it" and leave it at that.
Tieing Shoes
In school I once bent down to tie my shoelaces and hit my forehead on a radiator. Started bleeding like a waterfall. Told my teacher I slipped on some moss and hit my head on a stone wall.
- Tylerich
Defeating The Dark Lord
My husband and I were having sex and he "missed" and rammed me right in my lady taint. It hurt so much I was convinced I was going to either throw up or sh*t myself, so I ran to the bathroom and sat on the toilet. I woke up 3 minutes later in my husband's arms covered in blood. I had passed out on the toilet and fallen head first into the bathroom door hinge. I got 6 stitches in my forehead and now have a lighting shaped scar.
I told my family and friends I was having such bad stomach cramps that I passed out in the bathroom and hit my head (not unusual for me to pass out with pain.) They bought it. I did once tell a drunk man in a bar who asked that I got it defeating the Dark Lord. So worth it, maybe?
Tap Dancing
I was tap-dancing in the shower & I fell over. Broke my ankle in three or four places. Told everyone I was playing netball against big bro. I am such a failure.
Waving To A Friend
I once tripped while waving to one of my friends at church and scraped half of my face. I just didn't tell anyone what exactly had happened, because I felt so stupid afterwards because I wasn't paying attention at all.
History is made on a daily basis.
Indeed, there is little more exciting than having witnessed the accomplishments of people like Barack Obama, Stacey Abrams, and Greta Thunberg knowing that they have firmly reserved a space for themselves in history books.
Of course, most of the people who paved the way to make the world what it is today have long since passed away.
Not all of them, though!
It may surprise you to learn that there are people who made an indelible impression on history who are still much alive today.
Some of whom even continue to make a difference to this very day
Redditor enginearz was eager to hear about historical figures people were surprised to learn were still alive, leading them to ask:
"What famous person from history is still alive?"
Forever Leaving His Name In Science
"Yuri Oganessian."
"He's the only currently living man with an element on the periodic table named after him."- snowflake247
Quite The Story To Tell
"Simeon Saxe-Coburg-Gotha."
"Last human to hold the title of Tsar, as leader of the Kingdom of Bulgaria."
"He was exiled along with his family when the Soviets invaded Bulgaria in 1944."
"In 1990, after the fall of the Soviet Union, Simeon returned from exile to Bulgaria and July 2001, was democratically elected prime minister."
"The private citizen is now 85."- DirectionNew5328
Making Nature Cool For Decades
"Jane Goodall."
"David Attenborough."- random_username_96
The Fought For Freedom And Justice
"John Hemingway."
"The last surviving airman of the battle of Britain."
"He is 103 years old."
"Ivan Martynushkin."
"He helped with the liberation of Auschwitz."
"He is 99 years old."
"Benjamin Ferencz."
"He was a prosecutor at the Nuremberg trials."
"He is 102 years old."- Ashtar-the-Squid
"Traute Lafrenz."
"The last living member of the german anti-nazi resistance group 'White Rose".
"Most well-known members were the sibling Sophie and Hans Scholl, who were executed by the Nazis when they were identified."- ChrisTinnef
The One Who Made One Giant Leap For Mankind
"Buzz Aldrin, and I’m not even American."- mukaltin
Opening Doors For So Many Others
"Ruby Bridges."
"She was one of the first black kids to go to an all-white school."
"There is a famous picture of that first day."- mumwifealcoholic
He Continues To Surprise Us
"Ozzy Osbourne."- CaptinDerpI
Admirably Defying So Many Odds
"Jimmy Carter."
"98 years old."- Back2Bach
We've Still Got Two Out Of Four
"Paul and Ringo"- HMKingHenryIX
Inching Close To The Big One Double Oh...
"Kissinger."- LucyVialli
Who Could Forget About Dick Van Dyke ?!?!?!?!
"Everyone just forgetting about Dick Van Dyke, he's like 97 and still going."
"If you've never heard of him, he played in Marry Poppins, along with a bunch more movies"- Longjumping_Drag2752
And Still Stunning
"Sophia Loren is still kicking."- The_REAL_McWeasel
Continuing To Go Where No Man Has Gone Before
"William Shatner doesn't look it but that dude is in his 90s wtf."- flubberF*ck
Perhaps what's most admirable, is that even when these astonishing people do eventually pass, they will continue to live on and change the world with the remarkable work they did.
We all indulge in fast food from time to time.
Even if we know what we're eating isn't exactly healthy, sometimes the salty, fatty mass-produced food is the only thing we want.
Resulting in our making weekly, if not daily, visits to a nearby chain.
Then, of course, there are the chains that we make every effort to avoid.
We've likely tried places at least once simply because everyone is always talking about them.
But after having one bite, we have trouble seeing exactly what all the fuss was about and vow to never return.
Even if it might be the only option at a rest stop or even the only available food for miles, we instead opt to wait and be hungry.
Redditor BungOnMimosas was curious to hear what people considered to be the most overhyped fast food chains around, leading them to ask:
"What do you think are the most overrated fast-food chains? Why?"
"Food As It Should Be"... Or Not...
"I know it's not technically 'fast food', but Panera Bread pisses me off."
"Insanely expensive for extremely average food." - Reddit
"Panera."
"Their quality has decreased so much in the past few years and they’ve added weird sh*t to their menu like pizza and chicken sandwiches."
"Massive identity crisis and crap food."- asm233
Things Ain't What They Used To Be...
"All of them, now that they charge real restaurant prices."- P00pf4rt5
Golden Arches
"As much as I hate to say it, McDonald's is the only place that I can think of that the quality hasn't changed much."
"I mean, that's a pretty low bar, but it is what it is."- gnatman66
"The majority of them, especially the really big ones (McDonald's, Wendy's, BK, Pizza Hut, etc)."
"The prices are no longer fast food prices and the quality is not there like it used to be."
"Far better local options that cost roughly the same at the end of the day."- senorita_diablo
Consistency Is Key...
"Dunkin."
"You can go to the same location three separate times, have the food made by the same staff, and receive 3 wildly different results."- AndrewLampart
Not So Popular Anywhere, It seems...
"KFC in France became so bad."- SterBout
Likely Won't Go National...
"Idk how wide spread they are, but in the Buffalo NY area there is a chain called Mighty Taco."
"They were even voted best tacos a few years ago."
"It is absolutely terrible food."
"I’ve tried to like it and given them 3 chances."
"Each time I couldn’t eat more than a couple bites."
"Absolutely terrible and I’m disgusted even thinking about their sour vomit in a tortilla."- aa-2020
"Eat Fresh"...
"I think I’ve answered this question before but definitely for me, it’s Subway."
"Nothing but a giant hunk of bread."
"I’m editing this to add that part of my anger about Subway is how good it used to be."
"I can remember the days of nearly a whole can of tuna salad delicious sub."
"And a Veggie sub with Swiss cheese and piles of yummy veggies and the sweet Vidalia onion sauce."
"It’s all gone to sh*t."
"I would’ve been perfectly OK with increasing price but the big drop in quality pissed me off."
"Oh woe is me with my first world problems."- Mysterious-Region640
Quantity Doesn't Guarantee Quality...
"Starbucks is a scam."- cmkeller62
Tasty, But Not Worth It...
"I’m going to say Five Guys."
"Not because the food isn’t good, but because I’m not paying $20 for a burger meal."- 2PacTookMyLunchMoney
"Dairy queen grill and Chill for sure."
"I worked at one for a lil' while and 1 burger combo is $14.56 CAD."- lolidk13
And Not In A Good Way...
Big Kahuna Burger, it kills you."-Darklock2022
No two people have the same taste in food.
Some people know to avoid crappy food, while others eat literally nothing else.
People Break Down Which Movies They Wish They Could Watch Again For The First Time
There are several movies I've watched so many times I think the viewings outnumber the days I've lived.
And much like a favorite tv series or movie, who wouldn't love to start again anew?
Experiencing that first time but with that feeling of... "I'm gonna love this forever."
We never appreciate the first time enough.
But that's life.
Warning: there are spoilers below.
Redditor Jacale1 wanted to discuss all the movies we wish we could experience new all over again, so they asked:
"What is one movie that you wish you could watch again for the first time?"
There are a lot of mystery movies I'd love to redo, just to figure out the killer sooner.
Gasps!
"The Shawshank Redemption."
MisOlga26
"A great nominee. Will never forget gasping when that rock went through the poster, and again when the warden pushed his arm through and ripped it down.... wow."
GalavantingRhino
Over and Over
"Edge of Tomorrow."
jeanrbel
"Is it bad that I got enjoyment knowing Tom Cruise died a lot in that movie. Never on screen, but it happened. Over and over. I hate that guy. How the hell was he the same height as Nichole Kidman in the movies they acted in together. Rhetorical question."
monrovista
"Honestly the whole reason I watched the movie to begin with is that he kept dying over and over."
AutomaticMethod2437
Swooned Away
“'Stardust'- if you don’t know you’ll never know."
jthekoker
"I’m surprised that a fantasy romcom can be so enjoyable, for a straight guy. It’s just the right balance between fantasy, comedy, drama, and romance. Most of the female cast are very easy on the eyes too."
"I swooned when Yvaine glows while dancing on the ship, and when she talks emphatically to the mouse in the caravan. This movie has a lot of A listers, and they deliver. I’m not gonna lie, I have probably watched it half a dozen times."
Redcarborundum
"The book has so much more in it, even having seen the movie you'll feel like a child again."
Beowulf33232
Hail Sigourney
"Alien."
NearDeafExperience
"I watched this with my wife, who has never seen it, and that's about as close as you can get to watching it for the first time. It really displayed just how good the movie is. Also I love Aliens just as much for different reasons."
QueafyGreens
"Came here looking for this! I watched it for the first time with my dad when I was 11, and it’s one of my favorite childhood memories. Amazing movie."
_shes_a_jar
Hey Arnold
"Terminator 2."
lobotomek
"I first watched this as a kid when I knew Arnold was the good guy in movies, and I had not seen T1. I wish I watched T2 for the first time after having watched T1. The mall scene would have been even more mind blowing."
Volvulus
T2 was definitely bada**!! I'd redo that.
Brilliant
"The Departed."
Lineworker2448
"Bro, I'll go further. If I could watch the Nicholson covered in blood scene or the final scene between Damon and Wahlberg, I would be so freaking happy. The sheer acting clout on display for the first is near a masterclass while the last scene was just so business like, I'd love to relive that scene with fresh eyes. I love this freaking movie."
DaBearsMan_72
Originality
"The original Star Wars. Man, that blew our minds! It totally changed movies from then on. We'd never seen such incredible special effects. The story was so fun and the experience was amazing."
Raggmommy
"Even though I’m not a franchise fan, I can get behind this answer. Because when I saw it first run, I was fourteen, and nothing like it had ever been done. I think it was the first movie where the special effects were the movie? Now that’s standard. It’s a reason people see many films now."
"So, for sheer originality, I’d watch it again, but only for the first time. I barely recall the second movie."
Alexbmac
SURPRISE!!
"The 6th Sense. I audibly gasped in the theater. All the clues are obvious on rewatch but that first time, before anyone knew M. Knight Shyamalan was a twist guy... wow."
GalavantingRhino
"I never got to see it the first time. My girlfriend at the time (now wife) inadvertently let slip the ending thinking I had already seen it. I have never seen the point in watching it knowing the ending. But I did enjoy The Village."
failurebeatssuccess
"I watched it again and it was more of a sad film than a thriller."
anotherbarry
Just Beautiful!
"Spirited Away. I was blown away by how beautiful and bonkers it is."
Lizziebunnypie
"Saaaaame! Every single Studio Ghibli film, but Spirited Away especially! I’ve still watched it a million times though, and it’s always special. If I’m in a bad mood that film always cheers me up!"
"Also, Avatar-the last air bender. I know it’s not a movie, but I felt like it deserved a mention. I’ve watched the whole thing several times, and it’s always great, but I do wish I could forget it and rewatch it. I’m 35 btw... lol."
Mimi_315
Great Scott!
"Back to the Future."
dwkindig
"I'd love to watch that in the cinemas... Now from the future."
billieboop
Now I want to go to the movies.
There is no one way to anybody's heart or libido.
Sexy doesn't always have to equal raunchy.
I've known people turned on by music, books, nature, and even funerals (don't ask).
What starts someone's engine is a mystery.
Redditor asexyjohn18 wanted to hear about all the things that get people in the mood, so they asked:
"What is a non sexual trait that turns you on?"
I love a walk. A little strut. Nothing like getting the heart racing.
Tingles
"Getting my head scratched or having someone run their fingers through my hair."
SensitiveDolphin55
"Same. It’s so pleasant when the tingles run down your spine... ;-) "
PumpkinSpiceMaster
LOLOL
"When a girl genuinely laughs at jokes I make."
Realistic_Practice16
"I remember being on a first date with a beautiful woman and I made a bit of corny joke/comment and she laughed at it. I remember thinking, damn, wait till I get to my good stuff. I did get to my good material apparently as we were married. She gives me as many laughs as I give her."
CarlJustCarl
Do Right
"Kindness. When I see someone going out of their way to help others for no other reason than it’s the right thing to do… that is some truly attractive vibes."
Electrical-Bid-9577
"Apparently it's vanishing from this world really fast. People who show kindness often end up in losses (of course not everytime but most of the time yes). It really breaks my heart."
Walker1798
"Probably the sexiest thing out there. Someone can be smoking hot, funny, talented, etc. But if they're not kind, they're unattractive."
sravll
Oh Yes...
"Smiling right at me, and men stretching. LAWD HAVE MERCY!!"
Skwiddling
"I have trouble smiling at women. Is this a turnoff for them? And ones I like are really hard to smile at. Because I know it's always going to be some really weird big smile if I am crushing which makes me feel like a super duper creep."
Maximum_Knee_4622
Simplicity
"Sorry if this is too kinky but i like it when they care about me."
SirReal10000
"Too far man. You need to rethink your choices."
Funkeysismychildhood
Sometimes it's all about the heart.
Eye 2 Eye
"When a guy explains something to you in a calm and understanding voice. Bonus points for gentle eye contact."
Belphiespillow666
GENIUS!!
"Being crazily intelligent. Screw dirty talk, I want you to explain some unexplainable s**t in my ear."
-F**KINGUSERNAME
"Heck yes. My best connections have been with a philosophy/history professor turned chancellor, an environmental engineer, and a neurosurgeon, all 3 Summa cum laude grads and conference speakers in their fields. The downside to genius though is complete absorption in their fields leaving little time for in person connection."
__trezora__
Yummies
"Everyone should know how to cook. Hunger knows no gender. I like to eat good food so I learned how to cook. I asked my mom one day and she reacted surprised. She was more than grateful to have an opportunity to teach me the ‘finer’ aspects of cooking, as she called it. Lol. I love food."
"My girlfriend, now wife, likes to jokingly say I got her into bed with a well seasoned steak and homemade fries. I mean we did sleep together almost immediately after we finished dinner so maybe she’s right. That old saying comes to mind. 'The quickest way to the heart is though the stomach.'"
SaiyanGodKing
Getting Green
"When I ask my husband for help when I repot my plants and he delicately cleans and moves the leaves. He is a mechanical engineer and he works with huge pieces of industrial equipment, seeing him so tenderly caring for my plants just makes me melt."
BoysenberryNo3877
Limbs A Lot
"Men doing intricate work with their hands."
GooglePixel69
"I second this, also someone who can play guitar/bass real real well... just watching their hands, whoa mama."
squeaky-mcgee
Well, it seems that just about anything can get someone in the mood, especially if you're kind, courteous, and especially a good cook.
Anything to add? Let us know in the comments below!