There are things you kind of assume people can't make it into adulthood without understanding.
But you'd be amazed how much those assumptions don't exactly match up with reality.
Redditor The_Sh0w asked:
"What's something you can't believe you had to explain to another adult?"
The privilege of in depth and accurate education isn't something we all have.
Here in the United States it is perfectly legal to teach inaccurate information in schools (we're looking at you anatomy and sexuality classes) and so it's sort of understandable why so many people still think women urinate from their vaginas.
Sorry if you're just now finding out.
We'll give you a minute to process.
Check out some of these other "you totally should have known this" things that people have had to patiently (or not-so-patiently) explain to other adults.
A Female Human and A Male Human
How men and women evolved together. He said evolution can't be real "because what are the chances a female human and male human evolved to match each other?" as though they evolved separately then just met up one day.
I also had to explain we're still evolving.
Scaring Chlamydia Away
That if you want to get rid of an infection (in this case, Chlamydia), it's not enough to just own the antibiotics prescribed to treat it. You have to actually ingest them. You have to put the pills (500mg Azithromycin, 2 tablets, one time dose,) into your mouth and swallow them. You can't, like, threaten the Chlamydia with the pills and frighten it away.
I'm an OB GYN nurse in a clinic- this person was a patient. Plus she was pregnant, which is why I needed her to not have Chlamydia. When I asked "How do you think this works?" I got a blank stare.
GiphyNot Enough Electricity
Had a coworker once that told us she had to use special calculators, keyboards, etc. because she didn't have enough electricity in her hands. Her response when I told her that wasn't how electricity works was that she had seen an electrician about it.
I just left.
Was she talking about touch screens? She may have got the electrical facts wrong, while correctly noticing that screens don't react to her fingers: https://www.consumerreports.org/cro/news/2015/06/zombie-finger-and-touchscreens/index.htm
Give her a travel-sized bottle of skin moisturizer, and tell her it was recommended by a top electrician.
No, she was talking about an actual physical calculator. She was legitimately an idiot who said dumb things all the time. We only had her because her original department refused to take her back.
AC Power Settings
Thermostats- "You got it! The number is the temperature you want it to be, not power level"
- Dawnalla
Someone Is In There
Toilet doors. That's right, if it says occupied there is someone in there. If it won't open it's locked...because someone is in there. You have to wait outside because yes someone is in there. This was many times throughout the day.
I had the misfortune of having my office across the hall from the customer bathrooms. I would be informed when supplies ran out or there was a problem even though there was a sign to let customer service know. I had one man tell me I have to look in the toilet to know what is wrong with it. No. No I do not.
Contraception Concepts
Client - "I keep getting pregnant and it's not fair, I've already got 3 kids! You [social services, in general] need to help me."
Me - "Well, what contraception are you using?"
Client - "OMFG WTF (etc., etc.) I'm only sleeping with one fella, why the eff do I need contraception? I'm not a dirty slag!"
I had to gently explain that you have to use contraception if you don't want to get pregnant, even if you have just one sexual partner at the time.
- LTLxx
Family Fun With Furniture
Had to explain to my 50 year old father that queen sized beds were not made exclusively for women after he jokingly called me a sissy whilst we were talking about furniture.
My brother-in-law asked me why I wouldn't weld a metal lamp base onto his wooden shelf. After I explained it for him, he proceeded to cite a Minecraft modpack. He is 25 and this was 2 months ago.
- [Reddit]
Fried Or Fertilized
Fertilization of the egg is how pregnancy occurs.
Wife and I were having trouble conceiving for a while. Had some tests done, all was well, it was just a matter of time before it was going to happen (it did). When the mother-in-law asked why my wife isn't pregnant yet, we mentioned eggs and fertilization, and it's just a matter of time.
Her reply was 'If you need eggs just go to the grocery store and get some.'
She legitimately thought that the doctor recommended we both need to eat more eggs to conceive a child. This woman is in her late 50's with some college education. She absolutely should know this.
GiphyNot A Charger
My friends and I were on vacation and decided to go into a sex shop. Mind you, we were all early to mid thirties. I was looking at range of toys when one of my friend asked which one of them charges Apple iPhone 8? 🤔 Had to explain what they were used for and she pretty soon walked out of the shop.
Five Plus Five Plus Ten Makes Twenty
That the pretty little "5" and "10" on the green bill she had meant 5 dollars and 10 dollars.
She said she had "3 dollars" after counting 2 fives and 1 ten dollar bill.
She was 22 .She had her diploma.
And I don't want to come off as though I'm making fun of her or talking bad about her because she's very sweet. She's kinda like a puppy. She's sweet and easy to love, but don't expect her to do your finances.
- MrR08070
Happy Halloween
To my ex boyfriend earlier this year (he is 26 and I am 25) I had to explain that Halloween is the same date every year. He asked me which day Halloween was this year, I said: "It's on a Thursday"
to which he replied "No what is the date date of it?"
I thought he was kidding until I realized he wasn't.
Cursive
Had to explain to an acquaintance in college that cursing, i.e. vocalizing words that societal groups regard as obscenities, was not the same as cursive, i.e. handwriting stuff where all the letters are getting freaky and loopy and all up in each others' business.
It took me about 5 minutes to fail to explain the difference to him, after which point I felt like cursive him out.
Animals
The definition of "animal".
To explain, this is how they thought things were arranged:
Humans - Humans
Animals - Anything with fur that is not human
Lizards - Uh?
Bugs and Birds - Catch-all for none of the above
They argued with me saying bugs are not animals, they are bugs. They also argued that plants are not living.
- pakidara
Even When You're Not In California
Ok when the bottle of brake cleaner says " known in California to cause cancer " you are not exempt because your not in California.
- Stone057
The Neighbors Fruit
I have to explain to my cousin that you can't take your neighbor's fruit that they planted in front of their house without their consent. I don't know if she is just being greedy or what but what a thing you have to say to 30 yo woman. No wonder she is still single until this day.
- Letsrain
Stars And Stripes
I was in a car with my Father In Law and we drove past an American flag and he said he wondered how many stars were actually on the flag and if they meant something or it was just the way it was designed. Yes, we're both Americans and this was in America.
- rlw0312
Swimming While Pregnant
My best friend was pregnant around 18. I couldn't convince her that it was okay to go swimming because she was concerned the baby would drown. In the end, I told her to just call the doctor so we could go swimming.
Fridge And Freezer
That a fridge and a freezer were two different things with two different purposes. Worked with a guy in a kitchen who honestly thought that both functioned in the same way, kept finding ice cream and such in the fridge and veg etc. in the freezer.
Driving To Hawaii
My mother wouldn't believe that you could not drive to Hawaii. She told me I didn't know, since I had never been to Hawaii. She's a stubborn old broad who won't take criticism and evidently has never seen a map.
GiphyPierced Ears
They informed us about STDs in school and they said that we shouldn't use used needles, so a girl asked: "Am I getting AIDS if I pierce both of my ears with the same needle?"
So listen, some of the answers were things that if we squinted really hard we could kind of understand ... kind of.
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Being let go from your job is never a pleasant experience.
Particularly if it comes out of nowhere, without any possible warning that this was a possibility.
Even if it isn't any more pleasant, generally speaking, most people have at least an inkling of why they were let go.
Budgetary reasons, dissolved departments, being told you weren't meeting company standards, or bad blood with the boss.
As well as some less common, highly unusual reasons which at least might make a good story down the line.
Redditor Sweetlo123 was curious to hear from people who were let go from their jobs, and why they were met with this fate, leaving them to ask:
"What did you get fired for?"
For Standing Up For What's Right.
"We were told we get OT for night work."
"The new 'company manager' let it slip that we don't actually get OT for night work, so when I was scheduled for five nights in a row working on a transmission line cell site I mentioned that I expect everyone working from our company on site get OT."
"Once it was said that we won't get OT and that it wasn't an actual policy (was written in employee handbook), I forwarded the email chain to the entire company and leadership at Verizon."
"I was canned, but now everyone gets OT for night work."
"My life is better now anyway and got my people what the deserve."- drklunk
This Was Never Going To End Well...
"Aggressively squeezing breakfast muffins lol."
"I was a few days into working at Mcds and someone complained I gave them a muffin that was too hard-they bake them at like 3 am and sit in a warmer all day."
"This was before they had the full bakery menu, I think muffins was the only thing baked and maybe cookies."
"So my manager told me to squeeze them before I hand them out."
"Me being a dumb teenager squeezed the s*it out of these muffins and got another complaint."
"They stopped scheduling me, haha."- eatmyknuts
You Have To Do The Work To Get Paid...
"I just stopped working and began only attending meetings."
"Lasted almost 9 months that way before they let me go."- frantictossing
martin freeman sleeping GIFGiphyWrong Time, Wrong Place
"I was fired after a month into my first job at a local pizza joint when I was 16."
"They called me during the Super Bowl and said I had to come in."
"I told them I was out of state without a car so no way I could make it."
"They said I should’ve known this was one of the busiest days of the year and I should’ve stayed in the area."
"I came in to work my next shift and they just gave me my paycheck and said they had to let me go for not being a team player."
"10 years later I was fired from a job in tech because I refused to move out of state."
"This one hurt a lot more."- seventyfive1989
Hard Not To Say They Had It Coming...
"The company's timeclock software ran off of the computers time, so when I was late I would just close the software, change the time back to before shift start and then clock in and change it back."
"The supervisor who showed me the trick fired me."
"A day or two later he saw me pulling in late, and when he went over the time info that day, it showed me clocked in on time."
"He knew why."- Grief-Inc
Nepotism Always Screws Someone Over...
"Worked at a gas station and was a sucker for the free soda."
"I would drink a few 24 oz glasses of Dr. Pepper (don’t judge) per shift and had to piss relatively frequently."
"I usually worked with the same lady every shift and every shift my drawer came up short even like $10-20 bucks."
"One day my usual co-worker was off and I worked with another lady who warned me to watch my drawer around the other and hers had been short when she was around."
"That got me to thinking."
"The next shift with the usual lady I stuck some receipt paper into the lip of the bottom of my drawer and hit the bead."
"When I came back the paper was on the floor."
"My drawer was short $20 at shift change and my boss fired me."
"I told her of my findings and asked her to review the security tape."
"She told me to f*ck right off the other lady had been there years."
"I left heart broken and rented some VHS tapes to indulge in and recover."
"One of the movies was Casino and man is that a good movie."
"Come to find out the usual lady was the boss lady’s cousin and they f*ckin told people I knew I got fired for stealing money."
"I though about calling a lawyer but also, I was in high school and was delusional I suppose."
"I got out of that town after high school and rarely return, especially considering all my family moved off."- woohhaa
Snl Smiling GIF by Saturday Night LiveGiphyThe Age Old Story Of Men In Power
"Caught the boss stealing."
"So he fired me."
"His word vs. mine and it didn't go my way."- freezingprocess
People Tend To Get What They Deserve
"Embezzled almost $500,000 from the doctor's office I worked at."
"Oh no, wait."
"That was my former supervisor who did that...26 years after she fired me for taking home a left over slice of pizza after a drug rep hosted a pizza party for the office staff."
"Karma can take a long time, but it always comes through."- YourFront
Late To The Game...
"Being the last hired when they instituted layoffs."- BubbhaJebus
Some Plans Can't Be Cancelled
"1970s YES 'Close to the Edge' tour."
"I had my tickets and had the request approved for time off, they changed their mind at the last minute and would not let me off."
"Pfft."
"Left anyways and was genuinely surprised when I got back on Monday and they informed me that I was fired."-AmandaBRecondwith
Treat Others Like You Want To Be Treated
"My boss was talking sh*t about me to employees, and I confronted her with 'how would you expect the people below me to respect me when you show them that you don’t?'"
"She didn’t like it and literally went crying to the owners, who then fired me for 'causing problems'.”- Successful-Snow-562
For Literally Doing What They Were Supposed To
"I got fired for slacking off and underperforming at work by taking my legally required lunch."- 10leej
Hungry Lets Eat GIF by TRTGiphyThey Couldn't Have Waited One Day?
"Worked as a QA tester for an online game company."
"Found bug while on my personal account at home."
"Came in the next day and reported the bug."
"I was VERY clear I found the bug while playing at home on my personal account."
"It was a nasty bug that let you duplicate very expensive items."
"A few weeks later someone in customer service was checking the logs for people exploiting the bug."
"They found mine and the company decided to fire me on my birthday."
"That was around 15 years ago but it still upsets me every year, on my birthday."- PedanticCyborg
While most believe "ignorance is bliss", anyone handed a pink slip deserves to know why.
Even if sometimes the reason gives no closure whatsoever, and instead only results in even more questions.
Certain locations really damper on a good time.
For instance, it's not fun to do it in cramped spaces.
Looking at you, airplane bathrooms and backseat of cars.
Many cannot be bothered to maneuver in some odd location.
Beds. Beds are sexy.
Always were, always will be.
Redditor sasukelikescarrots wanted to hear about the places we should all avoid when getting it on, so they asked:
"What do you think are some overrated places to have sex?"
Elevators.
One... I'm claustrophobic.
Two... there is not enough time.
Fatal Attraction lied to us y'all.
The Worst
The Beach Summer GIF by Kel CripeGiphy"The beach is the worst."
thotsnprayers68
"I hate sand so much so I agree with you."
Millionsmoney
Let Alone Two
"Airplane bathroom. Too cramped, and smells gross. Keep your Mile High Club pendant."
REUBG58
"I was thinking this too. I am also willing to bet that 99% of people who claim to be in the Mile High Club are lying through their teeth. Seriously, there's barely any space in those lavatories for one person, let alone two, and it's a little hard to get aroused when you're worrying about turbulence and people waiting to use the toilet knocking on the door."
Fresh-Hedgehog1895
Just Why?
"Public toilets... Why would you even..."
Reznik81
"The only reason I can think of is being a kid of an overprotective parent in high school and you want to desperately get it on with your boyfriend. Public restrooms are the only option sometimes. (Experience)."
I-couldbeadog
Too Wet
"The pool and the shower."
GrilledStuffedDragon
"I hate the shower. I think it was a comedian who said, 'I’ve never been having sex and thought you know what would make this better… If one of us was freezing.'"
"I personally like the shower cause my partner likes to be in the water and I like being cold so it works out cause sex gets me pretty warm anywho."
BOOboUraisin23
"The shower is for foreplay, not sex. Pretty much every time we shower together it’s a given that it will lead to sexy time, whether we were planning on it or not/in the mood or not…. intimacy and touching, etc.,?…. we just B-line for the bedroom. But sex IN the shower?… no."
Jibber_Fight
And a Happy Meal?
happy ronald mcdonald GIF by McDonald's CZ/SKGiphy"McDonalds ball pit…"
ami2weird4u
"They have a cleaning machine that can clean all the balls and it's all sanitary. I think that could be a really good time"
copper_basket
Have some decorum people.
I'd go to Burger King.
Check Please
Applebees GIFGiphy"The men's room at Applebee's during Happy Hour on a Tuesday."
Thiccaca
"Oddly specific."
some1sbuddy
Bad Idea
"Car sex."
Shrikeangel
"I spent my teens and early 20s having sex in cars. About a year ago (I'm almost 40) the wife and I are out and in the mood so let's have sex in the car like we used to. Bad idea, how the f**k did we used to have sex all the time back there, now it's uncomfortable and I got a cramp in my leg."
Psyco_diver
"Yes. The handful of times I’ve tried this, it’s always been so cramped and you need to keep repositioning or someone bumps their head. I guess it could be fine if you had one of those huge American tanks, but cars here in Australia never have that much room inside."
StellarSandDweller
Oh Lord
"Churches and graveyards. I've done it in both, and it's not really that great."
filly_fanatic
"Never in my life have I thought either of those locations sounded like a fun place to have sex. I guess if you have a kink for getting caught then it's as good as any because there's this perception of it being sacrosanct, but it just seems at best uncomfortable and at worst going to get me on a registry somewhere.
"hopeishigh
The Waves
"Waterbeds. One of my GF's had one, and I *hated* it. It's impossible to get traction or the proper angle."
disturbednadir
"Good call. There’s nothing to push off of. Nowhere to plant knees either. A true s**t show."
SocialMediaSoooToxic
"I knew there was a reason why I forgot about my waterbed! Thanks for reminding me about that abomination!"
TinyCamp7743
Wow. I mean. Y'all have really gone out and experimented fully.
Congrats.