Death is upon us.
Eventually, like wrinkles, taxes and cellulite it will catch up.
That's why it's good to know as much as we can about it.
Who better to tell us than a real-life Lazarus or two?
Redditor Doomage007 wants those who have been reborn to speak up and let us know what is beyond by asking:
"People who legally died for a few minutes and came back, what was it like?"
Jolted...
"Working in a hospital and taking care of people who have been legally dead and have come back either on their own accord or with CPR, I've heard these people say that they felt like they were falling. They also wake up really confused not remembering the situation. To me it seems like what they experience is close to a dream that you're falling and wake up with a jolt."
Mycatbigmomma
Giphy
Under Water....
"A friend of mine had an overdose caused a stroke and legally died for a little under three minutes in the ambulance on the way to the hospital. He remembers the stroke, and being wheeled to the ambulance on a stretcher. Then he felt like he was floating under ice cold water, and it was dark, but he wasn't really thinking or feeling anything emotionally, just existing and knowing it was very very cold and he couldn't see."
"Then he woke up, and the EMTs were kinda freaked out because his heart had stopped long enough that they figured he was done. At some point in the following days he became convinced that what he experienced was hell minus the knowledge of suffering, like a toned-down preview, and thought it was a warning for him to change his life. Sadly he didn't stay clean for long."
HanumanNinja
In the House....
"My Dad ended up in the ICU with internal bleeding. All initial attempts to stop the bleeding failed. Apparently died for a couple of min but they were able to bring him back. He said he remembers walking through an all grey neighborhood. Grey houses, grey grass, grey streets, everything a different shade of grey. No people or animals around. Empty but not run down or anything like that. He assumed this was the afterlife so he proceeded to walk around and search for my cousin who recently passed away."
"He made his way into a house and walked up the stairs. At the top of the stairs a door opened and a bright light shined through. He couldn't see anything because of the light but decided not to walk into it. He paused there on the stairs and asked for more time. The door closed. Doctor was able to stop the bleeding. Thats was 12 years ago. My Dad still has health issues but he got more time like asked for."
StatementProper4450
Nothing
"Total darkness. Like going to sleep with no dreams. Until you are brought back, then searing pain kicks in. I guess its bc the body goes out of shock, and you feel everything. That's what it felt like to me."
Sinicalkush
Not so Dead....
"So I wasn't legally dead, but incapacitated due to CO2 inhalation. (Failed seal on an automatically inflating life vest). Fortunately it was in a controlled environment and I was pulled out of the situation when they realized something was wrong. When I came to there was a period of time where I had absolutely no idea who I was or what had happened. All I was really sure of was that I had died and was waiting to be sent to the afterlife."
"My lungs burned with every breath but I wasn't aware that I was breathing, so it felt like a combination of all encompassing, burning pain and suffocation. I was very confused as to why I couldn't just die and have it all be over. When I finally regained some semblance of reality I was very happy that I wasn't dead."
Cheshire_Jester
3 times a charm....
"I've been pronounced dead twice in my life. The first time, I drowned as a child (about 7 years old). I wanted to see the pool from the high-dive. I went up, looked, and slipped when I went to go back down. I remember falling..... and then I was surrounded by paramedics and spewing pool water from my lungs while some lady was crossing herself. According to what I've been able to piece together, I was knocked out when I hit the water, and the lifeguard thought I was playing."
"I drowned while everyone was waiting for me to surface. 911 was called and I was dragged from the water. CPR, before, and from the paramedics didn't work. They were about to cover me up when I started spewing water like a fountain. The second time was at work in my early 20's. I'm an industrial electrician (still to this day). I was working on the controls for a 3 phase/600v air handler's motor. I had turned the circuit off, locked it, and tagged it. Someone cut my lock off and turned it back on without telling anyone."
"One second I'm working on the controls, next second my entire body lights up with pure pain and agony, and then I wake up in the hospital. My boss heard my teeth clack shut when I got hit, and he hit me in the chest with a 2x4 to get me off of it. I didn't have a pulse when EMT's got there, and they got my body rebooted. I woke up in the hospital about 4 hours later. I never saw a light at the end of a tunnel, no lake of fire... literally nothing. I'll post an update if it happens again."
Gr8v3m1nd
People Share Their Unexpected Happiest Moments | George Takei’s Oh Myyy
While many of life's big events like weddings and births bring us joy, even the smallest of gestures or gifts can leave a lasting impression. Especially if y...Warm Hands
"When I was a teenager I had leukemia and there was a set of shots that we would do at home that my mom would give me. We did not know that I would have a toxic reaction towards the end of the series. After getting a shot and right before dinner I told my mom I wasn't feeling well and I passed out and stopped breathing. I was "dead" for at least a couple of minutes before my dad started CPR and the medics came. I do not remember telling my mom that I felt weird, next thing I remember was feeling very cold and hearing my mom's voice (they were taking me out to the ambulance and it was winter time."
"My mom was talking to them I later found out) I was very out of it but I felt warm hands on my arm and a woman telling me it was going to be ok. I guess at one point I hugged her and told her I loved her. I have kept in touch with her over the years. If i could have the feeling of the warm hands and someone telling me everything was going to be ok when I die for real I will be happy."
Computron1234
Bridged....
"My mother was legally dead for a half an hour due to a cardiac arrest. (As a side note, recovery from cardiac arrest after 10 minutes is a 1% chance and decreases exponentially every second after that, so it's really a miracle she survived and with very little brain damage to boot)."
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"She remembers a 'dream' in that time where she was headed towards a bridge. On the other side she saw her (deceased) parents smiling and waving. As she approached the bridge, their expressions changed. They didn't want her. My mom explains feeling rejected by her own parents and crestfallen because of it, but she didn't get on the bridge and turned around. After she came back, she recognizes the change in their demeanor to be that they didn't want her yet because it wasn't her time to 'cross-over' yet."
Icarus374
Life after Life
"There's an interesting book called 'Life after Life' by a Dr. Moody who became interested in this experience when one of his patients went through it. He did a study, interviewing hundreds of people who had this happen to them. He said that there were a variety of experiences, some not remembering anything but he listed seven common ones. Not everyone had all seven but everyone has some of the seven."
"Buzzing noise, feeling like they were out of the body, going through a tunnel, meeting former family or friends, meeting a being of light, coming to a boundary where they knew that if they crossed it, they couldn't return, I can't remember the last one."
Intagvalley
Not yet....
"Might not count but family story; takes place in Sicily in the early 1900s. Had a great uncle that the doctors had written off for dead. Uncle remembers a person/angel walking up to him, slapping him on the cheek, and saying "Hey, get up. It's not your time yet." Doctor was apparently stunned to see him all dressed and good to go when he came back."
ztimmmy
Oh Mama...
"My mother was dead for over twenty minutes. She said she saw nothing, felt nothing. She only new she'd been dead when she was brought round by the medics in the hospital. As she is a very religious lady it knocked her religious belief for many many years. She now thinks she wasn't supposed to see anything as she feels she would have wanted to stay with those she would have seen like her mother etc."
EnglishArtist
Cuffs
"I remember getting in the ambulance and I remember getting out. Was completely unaware that I had arrested until I was told some days later."
MoFauxTofu
In the Eyes
"I watched my mom die from acute pulmonary edema. She looked me straight in the eye seconds before and said, 'I’m not afraid. She says she’s glad to see me.' She was revived and had no memory of what she saw unfortunately. She passed away a year later."
sanibelle98
An Elizabeth Event!
"I had a heart attack while on a run. Dropped dead and bounced off the ground. Cardiologist are sure my heart stopped for about 30 seconds. I snapped back to when the guys started calling my name. It wasn’t a Fred Sanford 'it’s the big one Elizabeth' event. Didn’t see any light or myself, it was like a surreal dream without anything remarkable. Got up and walked the last 50 feet (15 meters) to cross the finish line. Did damage to the heart, received multiple stents, in the hospital for four days and was 50 years old. Moral of the story, listen to your body."
Sheepdoginblack
Like a Dream
"My father actually had a heart attack and by some miracle he was lucky to get to the hospital in time before it was too late, but in the ambulance he flat lined and they had to revive him I think twice? Which obviously worked but it took I think about 4 or 5 minutes which made everyone worry because his heart wasn’t beating which means he’s not getting blood to his brain that will cause brain damage."
"Long story short, no brain issues and he's completely healthy. I asked about his experience and if he saw some light or anything, but he doesn’t remember anything. He almost never remembers his dreams so even if he did see something I don’t think he’d remember through all of that lol."
Beccaaaaaalolz
Addiction Scares
"Died on new years day this year from a heroin overdose. Was pleasant, tossed on some tunes went over to the couch to sit down as the crap was coming on then the next thing I knew I was sitting in the back of an ambulance being told I had just died from an overdose."
"Really it was just like sleeping one minute I was there faded out then faded back in don't recall anything in between but I imagine it must have been horrible for my mom to find me that way. So yeah kids don't hell with heroin or opiates in general. Thankfully I'm not addicted to the stuff just occasionally dabbled for many years but after that shit I'm done for good."
Bilbo-Shwaggins
Christmas Morning
"So during a tilt table exam to test for dysautonomia, I was given a nitroglycerin tablet that stopped my heart for over 30 seconds. I flatlined until they were able to get the table back to horizontal. I don’t have any specific memories from DURING the time I was dead, but the very strange part was when I came back, and saw the room I was in, it was shocking to me. It’s hard to describe, but when I realized where I was I could not believe I was STILL there."
"It’s like I lived some life for what felt like weeks elsewhere, and coming back to this room was a very surprising blast from the past. Like imagine waking up today and it being Christmas morning from a few weeks ago. I was that level of surprised to see that old room again after all that time (30ish seconds)."
Rekanlats
Grandfather...
"2 years ago, for about 2 minutes, I saw my died grand-father and my aunt, the most strange thing is that I also saw one of my closest friend, that was alive... or at least he was alive until the previous day... the evening of the same day one of my other friends called me and I discovered that the friend I saw in my vision died three hours before me in a car accident."
AngeloCaruso91
On the Beach
"When i was a kid i contracted dengue fever. Major killer of kids my age. So while i wad hemorrhaging blood the crackhead doctors told my parents i had to have an appendix removal. They put me under but realised something was wrong when i didn't wake up for 48 hours later. During that time i had a hell of a dream. Was walking on a beach and there was a dude cloaked in black sitting on a bench. Had a nice chat with him before walking up."
hunterchris205
Open Heart
"My mom had open heart surgery not too long ago and was technically 'dead' for the surgery since no blood was being pumped through her heart. She said it was almost like in the movies where she was in an all white room and actually got to talk with her dad who passed away 20 years ago!"
chrisy369
Though there is an eternal debate about whether or not those who have been declared dead actually experience a brief glance at the afterlife.
Actual proof we may never have.
But it can't hurt to discuss, just in case.
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Every now and then, a friend of ours might say something, or we might overhear a complete stranger say something that makes us stop in our tracks.
More often than not, what we can't believe we just heard is something so ridiculous, we can't help but put the person who said it in their place.
Other times, however, what we just heard might have stunned us silent because of how shockingly clever it was.
Resulting in our not wanting to scold or yell at someone, but rather give them a handshake.
Redditor SubmergingOriginal was curious to hear the sharpest and wittiest things they've ever heard, from friends and strangers alike, leading them to ask:
"Enough with the dumbest; what is the wittiest thing you've ever heard someone say?"
Don't Give Me So Much Credit...
'I was on a team at work that was on a project working insane overtime."
"One night after an 80-90 hour week, we were all sitting around the table trying to finish up so we could go home."
"Around 11, my buddy's wife called, dubious about the hours he'd been keeping."
"We heard her through the line - 'are you cheating on me?'"
"Exasperated, he looked at our boss, then replied 'honey, if I was cheating on you, I would have been home by now'."- lionbatcher
Eternal Optimism...
"Asked a blind guy if he'd been blind his whole life."
"He said 'Not yet'."- Feeling_Mode_6465
Free time Isn't The Only Thing He Has On His Hands...
"My brother got a vasectomy and when the doctor was releasing him and giving him instructions (with the nurse listening in), one of the orders was to 'come back and have a follow-up appointment after you’ve ejaculated 30 times'.”
"Without missing a beat my brother asked 'what time do you open tomorrow?'”
"The nurse couldn’t keep it together after hearing that."- UtahUtopia
Awkward Season 8 GIF by The Office
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Double Whammy!
"My pal uses the phrase 'he doesn’t look strong enough to carry information' and it cracks me up every time."
"Calling someone stupid and weak in one fell swoop."- JennyW93
Can't Hide Your DNA...
'Whenever I jokingly insult my mum, she says 'that must be where you get it from'."
"She cracked the code."
"I can never offend her without offending myself."- JennyW93
Self-Sufficient!
"My brother was a line cook at a New Orleans restaurant."
"My mom was in town, staying at a fancy hotel, and he stopped by after work, still wearing his kitchen whites."
"He was reading a newspaper in the lobby waiting for her to come down when the shocked lobby manager sputtered at him, 'MAY I HELP YOU!?!?'
"He answered, 'thanks, but I know how to read',” and went back to his paper."- jobrody
Morph Current Affairs GIF by Aardman Animations
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A Miracle!
"My brother-in-law’s comment."
"The entire family went out for my mother’s 80th birthday and after the meal we all went to a local park, largely occupied by the elderly, to rest."
"My mother needed crutches at this point, and they were resting against her bench."
"My 10-year-old niece, who looked like every starving waif image from Dickens, grabbed the crutches and started hobbling round the park."
"All the OAPs were following her progress with looks of pity until my brother ran up behind her, and kicked away the crutches."
"There was an audible gasp from round the park and then my niece picked the crutches back up and started chasing my brother, clearly intending to hit him."
"In the confused silence my brother-in-law’s voice rang out 'Praise be! She can walk again!'"
"We still think this was the highlight of the birthday celebrations."- DdraigGwyn
Still Legal, Whichever Way You Cut It...
"I picked up my pleasantly tipsy boyfriend from a nightclub."
"We were stopped by the Police for a random breath test."
"They asked me my age, and I said, 33."
"My bf blurted out '33? You told me you were 22'."
"Police just laughed and let me go."- Aggravating-Corgi379
Music Video Police GIF by Andrew W. K.
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A Bit Too On The Nose?
"Business law class in college years ago, talking about the issues that black Americans had before the Civil Rights."
"Amendment, trying to travel through the south with the discrimination so rampant, trying to find restaurants to serve them and decent lodgings."
"My instructor was posing a hypothetical: 'So you pull up out front of this place, you're exhausted from driving for hours, and you see the sign out front says 'Ku Klux Klan Motel'."
"'What would you expect to find there?'"
"Without missing a beat, from the back of the room came this gem: "'Extra sheets in every room?'"- NedsAtomicDB
Not Yet, Anyway...
"I was working with my friend and his dad."
"My friend (26) heard an ice cream truck near where we were working."
"He asked his dad if he could have a couple dollars."
"His dad asked, 'what for?'"
"My friend told his dad that there was an ice cream truck in the neighborhood, and that they were playing music."
"My friends dad told him "'They don't charge anything to listen to the music'."- tatersalad1234567890
Words Escape You In The Literal "Heat" Of The Moment...
"A friend of mine is a teacher and her husband is known for his wit."
"She told this story to him:"
"One day at school a kid took the hall pass and returned reeking like smoke."
"She asked the kid if he’d been smoking and he denied it over and over."
"She was about to send him to the office when she noticed smoke coming from somewhere."
"She told the kid and he realized that he didn’t put his cig out completely and it was burning in his pants pocket."
"The kid noticed and frantically tried to put it out and someone finally poured water on it."
"Her husband sat listening to this with a weird look on his face."
"She asked him what was wrong."
“'What’s wrong???'"
"'This was probably the only chance you’ll have in your life to say literally, ‘liar,liar, pants on fire’ and you missed your chance'."- Luder714
On Fire No GIF by PEEKASSO
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Amazing What You Might Say A Few Drinks In...
"When I went to a renaissance faire once, I went to a beer tent and ordered a Newcastle Brown Ale (seemed the most fitting for the surroundings)."
"The beer wench, without skipping a beat, said, 'Everyone wants a Newcastle - no one wants to remodel!'"- jayhof52
Read The Room People!
"My dad wiped out when skiing down a mountain and lost a ski."
"After a few minutes of hunting for it, he gives up, slings the one remaining ski over a shoulder and starts walking down the mountain in his ski boots."
"About half-way down, another skier stops and goes 'Gee! Did you lose a ski?'"
"My dad instantly replied 'No, I was out for a walk and found one!'"- PeterJoAl
There's a reason your mother always told you to "use your words".
As clever remarks can have a much more lasting effect on people than a push or shove.