Parents are everything, well good parents, parents who are destined to be parents. Some people really shouldn't be parents. That's for another time to discuss. When we are all born our parental units have such high hopes and plans.... and more often then not, the spawn will choose the adverse path. When you're children choose the adverse path, it has to be harrowing, but, a true parent finds a way, even with disappointment. But that doesn't mean you can't chat about it.
Redditor u/fkac3080 wanted to let some parents vent by asking.... Parents of Reddit, why are you disappointed in your adult child?
Idiot!
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He got a 200,000 inheritance when is father passed away two years ago, he is broke now. TheWalrusSlapper
All you can do....
My son is 25 and was diagnosed with bipolar disorder at around 15 years old (maybe younger). After he became too old and too big for me to manage his meds he refused to take them and his life has been a roller coaster of disasters ever since. Between prison time (juvie and adult), bad decisions, suicidal ideation, drug use, fathering 2 children he doesn't see (same mom) and insisting on making up reasons to not speak to ME I'm done, because honestly there's nothing I can do for him. At this point I'm just waiting to get a phone call on where I need to go to identify the body. Reddit
You're Out!
He's 23, and mean as hell to everyone including his gf and their kids. He tells her things like "that's why nobody wants you" to her and to me he says things like "my kids don't even like you" (they are damn babies how do they know who they like yet, did they tell him and they can't even talk ) ... I had to cut him out of my life because the hurt he caused me was unreal and I was having issues in my daily life over it. jlu742069
Let me Tell You...
Oof, perfect timing. She's currently home for the summer and heads back to college in a few days. I feel bad for saying this, but I'm honestly ashamed that she's still enrolled there. This will be her 5th semester there, but she was supposed to have failed all her classes her 2nd semester. And 3rd. And 4th. Every semester, she skips class and parties, not even attempting her school work. Then when the school goes to kick her out, she appeals the decision and somehow, I honestly have no idea how, gets her professors to bump her grades just high enough for her to pass and continue on another semester. She lost all of her scholarships and grants already.
Initially, I was paying whatever tuition costs were leftover, and then was paying 75% of tuition and she got student loans for the rest. She was home for break last semester and I overheard her on the phone bragging to one of her friends about how she doesn't do any work because all she has to do is file an appeal to pass her classes. I was appalled and now that I know that, I'm not paying a dime.
I just don't understand why she does it or if I'm somehow responsible for causing this behavior as her father. But, we were poor when she was younger and even now, we're maybe lower middle class. She wasn't spoiled and saw how hard I worked to provide for her. We had an agreement when she turned 16 that if she wanted a car, she was responsible for paying for gas. She got a part time job and so I got her a used car.
My thought was that working to earn gas money would teach her firsthand the value of a dollar. That was the best way I could think of to teach her and give her some real life experience. I don't know if it didn't stick or what, but she seems perfectly content top keep up the routine and get a degree handed to her.
I worked for everything I have, and everything she has. Her college fund was a result of me squirreling away every dime I could for 10 years. She's currently pissed at me for it, but I will not continue to use this money to literally buy her a degree. I've begrudgingly decided to take a step back and let her handle her education on her own. im_with_cthulhu
LIAR!!
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Pathological liar. 33 years old and he would rather walk 10 miles to tell a lie than to stand still and tell the truth.
His ex wives all found out the same thing. vaylon1701
How do I activate?
I'm not disappointed in my 18-year old, but I sure wish I knew how to activate him. He graduated in May, has no desire to go to college and no real aspirations at all. He's pretty much been in his room on his phone since. He's struggled for many years with anxiety, which we're treating, and I know a lot of things are difficult for him, but man, I wish I knew how to get him excited about something - anything - whether it's a job or a hobby or a plan or whatever. FaustusRedux
Fear.
He's 20 and refuses to go to college or get a job. He lives with his mom, so all I can do is talk to him about it. I fear for his future, like, we, his parents, aren't immortal and he doesn't seem to have self-preservation skills. PansOnFire
The Tough Road.
I'm disappointed in my son because he is too much like me. He's a solid introvert who is afraid to ask for help and doesn't want to bother people -- even with very legitimate requests. He is an expert procrastinator.
I remember being that age and being soooo much like that. I'm not sure how I got through university, but I've been a successful engineer for 30 years so I've still got a lot of hope for him.
Also, both my kids vape/smoke. We've been anti-smokers for all our adult lives and I'm sad to see them choose to do something negative like that. They both "want to quit" but its a tough road. mks113
The Slacker.
My son is 24 and, by some standards, a disappointment. He has a degree and no job. He struggles with motivation, and his sleep patterns are terrible. I don't think he has a plan to move forward with his life.
Earlier in the year, my husband (his dad) was diagnosed with cancer.
I thank God every day for my "slacker" son. He is so kind. Every time he makes dinner "because I know you must be tired" or comes and gives me a hug when I get home from work makes it possible for me to keep going. PanickedPoodle
Be Better.
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Following this thread to see what I can do to be a better child to my parents while I still have the chance. ParanoidCrow
It is killing us.
He is 24 years old and has a full blow meth addiction that started in the last 6 months.
He was fired from the job he got at 18 because he was high and manic (sidebar his manager was the one that introduced him to meth). Since then he has dedicated his time to either finding or using meth. He has been arrested 3 times spent 30 days in jail and continues to use even though he is on probation.
He is angry because we will not allow him to live with us while he is using. He is now homeless.
He broke into our house and stole some of his father's sports memorabilia to support his habit. Some of it is not replaceable and very sentimental.
He is a shell of the human we knew 6 months ago both figurative and literally. He can not hold a normal conversation and is constantly twitching
We have offered to get him help but he is convinced that the drugs have set him free and we all are living in a delusional world where we have to work and conform to society.
It is killing us.
On the other hand our daughter (23) just graduated college in June with a paralegal degree and has decided to go to law school. She is afraid to celebrate her success because she doesn't want to make him feel bad or upset him. But forget him for taking that away from her. Lazy_Exorcist
42 and Rough.
He's 42, lives with his dad, is 6 years into a 2 year degree, and has gone through 4 decent cars in the last 6 months. His dad bought the cars and he trashed them. He's also threatened physical abuse to his dad. He disowned his older sister over a political argument on Facebook. She said I'm leaving this discussion before we say things we'll regret, and he tried to forbid it saying if she left she was disrespecting him and was no longer related to him. fabricnut85
Don't Give Up!
No drive, no ambition, and no work ethic worth a damn. He's 25, he peaked in 6th grade. basura_trash
This was me for 2 years. I was content with my boring and underpaid job and wasting time away smoking weed. I had a moment of catharsis so to speak about 2 months ago. Since then, I've studied hard to gain my teaching certificate, applied and was accepted into a teaching placement program, started reading books again, and ditched the pot for the most part. Not sure if this helps, but if I could do it, so can your son! DanielSnipeCelly
Double-whammy!
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My ex husband was the son that my parents wanted their actual son to be. So they're pissed that my brother isn't like him and they're pissed that I divorced him. Double-whammy. Never mind that we just fundamentally did not work as a couple: they basically see it as me stealing away their chance at having The Perfect Child in a son-in-law. Oh well! Much_Difference
31 & Lost....
He is 31 and has been a hard-core addict (meth, heroin) since age 15. He has put us through hell. I'm disappointed and we are estranged but he is still my son and I love him. Zen_Gaian
Deadbeat Dad.
He's a dead beat dad for his first daughter (which means I can't see my first granddaugther anymore), has been in and out of jail since the age of 11, is a multiple offense convicted felon as an adult, who will steal from anyone (myself and his mother included), and has threatened to have most of his family members killed.
He is known to carry (stolen) firearms, and frequently uses his brothers name to try to avoid being caught. He's a drug addict, living with a drug addicted girl, and they have now had two more children together, both of whom suffer from the effects of their parents drug addictions (fetal drug syndrome). Kardolf
Paging Dr. Phil....
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She has not become a multimillionaire and decided to fund my retirement. But she's only just turned 18. I give her a year or two to sort it out. PonFarJarJar
Her age is no excuse. The Cash Me Outside girl is already a millionaire and she's only 16. Get your daughter to Dr. Phil, stat! TheWickAndReed
"sometimes we just have to get on with it..."
My mum's disappointed that I left a £33,000 a year job for a £28,000 job because I had two mental breakdowns, even though everything is now perfect.
"sometimes we just have to get on with it..." kofisbootyos
'the promised child'
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I'm still not sure what my parents think of me. I was 'the promised child' who got 99th percentile on aptitude tests in kindergarten, aced tests, memorized the presidents by age 4(at my dad's insistence), and ended up just blundering my way through school because what started as a bad habit of not doing homework eventually amalgamated into depression-driven apathy about education.
I dropped out of college and I've spent more of my time in therapy learning how to be a good person and be happy, which does make my mom happy, but I can feel my entire extended family's disappointment in me that I chose to work an 8-5 job and just live in an apartment with my cat. On the bright side, I'm more confident in my life choices than I ever have been and wouldn't trade the positive mindset I've been working so hard on for any amount of work discipline. Spazznax
The Mess She's Made....
Ohh good timing. I have to be semi vague but hopefully you get the gist My middle daughter is 19 but we've had issues her entire life I strongly suspect BPD narcissism
Currently her infant child has been removed from her care by CPS for multiple reasons notably her erratic behavior she showed and continues to show and also heavy heavy marijuana use. We suspect other drugs at play but have zero proof.
Instead of cooperating to get her child back she has fought kicking and screaming every step of the way making it much harder than necessary. At the same time blaming her mother and vilifying her to the point that she has lied to CPS in an attempt to have them remove her 4 year old sister from her mothers care. Calling old friends and family giving them a hugely false story in an attempt to alienate her mother and have zero friends and help. It's a giant mess she's created and refuses to take any blame or acknowledge that she's the issue at all. nocomment101
When we're intoxicated, or even the slightest bit tipsy from having a little too much to drink, our immediate perspective on things is hazy.
But there's nothing like a bit of alarming news or a jarring incident to snap us out of the fog and focus on the moment.
Sometimes alcohol isn't always to blame for our impairment.
It can be a state of mind, like a perpetual numbness from being complacent in life, and all it takes is one shocking moment to rattle us back to our senses.
Curious to hear from strangers online about this type of scenario, Redditor Known_Challenge_7150 asked:
"What’s one thing that sobered you up real quick?"
These individuals were witness to shocking events that sobered them up right quick.
Bleeding Out
"Got out of a taxi and found a naked man profusely bleeding from his head crawling up the driveway in my condo. Called him an ambulance completely forgot I was absolutely wasted until 45 minutes later when I'd helped him translate and in to an amublance and stepped in my front door."
"Later a few days later learned he'd slipped in the tub and literally crawled out for help. Poor dude. He was fine but I genuinely thought he was going to die there."
– DongLaiCha
Tragic News
"At a bachelor party and we got a phone call that the groom’s father had suddenly passed."
– accountnameredacted
Bottom Of The Barrel
"I went to visit my parents back in July. I was homeless and deep into fentanyl addiction so I lost a lot of weight. My folks could see it. They knew something was up. Anyway, I spent the night and I was getting ready to leave in the morning and I looked at myself in the mirror for a good long time. I finally had enough and told them everything. They took me to detox, from there I went to rehab. Graduated in August and been living with them ever since then. I have 160 days clean and sober."
– Crotch-Monster
A reality check can be enough for some people to snap out of it.
Like Father, Like Son
"Was driving a drunk friend home, he had been on a bender again and was smart enough to call me for a lift rather than try and drive. As I helped in to his house his mother came down the stairs and said 'your as drunk as your father' and went back upstairs. I haven't seen him drunk since then, he still drinks but the thought of turning into his dad scared him out of hard drinking."
– psycospaz
Busted
"Flashing blue lights."
– FiddleOfGold
"This sobered me up just thinking about it."
– redmaple_syrup
Losing Sight
"Woke up to no sight in one eye. I had cataract surgery so just thought one of the lenses had slipped and it was an easy fix. Eye doc says nope, you had a stroke. I loved soy sauce, teriyaki sauce and salty food, which caused high blood pressure, which caused retina damage. Over six months was able to get most of my eyesight back with medication, and all back within a year. Trying to navigate life with one eye was very sobering. Started taking HBP much more seriously."
– MissHibernia
Quitting The Bottle
"Looked up someone I went to highschool with who was an awesome guy. Found out he had been dead for 3 years from alcoholism, at age 33. I made an overnight change. I hadn't started drinking that night yet, 10 months ago. Haven't touched it again since."
– omgtater
These disturbing moments were enough for Redditors to immediately come to their senses.
Unplanned House Guests
"Me and a buddy Woke up in someone’s living room, realized neither one of us knew the people, they were just nice and let 2 drunk guys sleep on their living room floor. We didn’t even say goodbye."
– Oneinsevenbillion75
Serious Health Warning
"Elevated liver enzymes."
"And the knowledge that this sh** was gonna kill me and I just couldn't orphan my family over it."
"So I opted for recovery, instead."
"Clean and sober since June 5, 2009."
– Far_Meal8674
The Joyride
"Grew up in a rural area. The little town hosted dances at the hockey arena, everyone (adults and kids) went and they overserved everyone, regardless of age. I was maybe 16 or 17 and was absolutely sh*tfaced, and jumped in the back of someone's truck with about 8 other people to go back to someone's cottage for after dance drinking. The driver (still don't know who it was) started racing one of his buddies and we whipped around small dirt roads, flying around blind corners on the wrong side of the road, going god knows how fast. It was basically a disaster waiting to happen. It was crazy scary and I was sober and thankful to be alive when we finally arrived."
– foxfood9116
The human psyche is a fascinating thing, isn't it?
How we can automatically focus on something urgent at a crucial time, even after getting buzzed from drinking too much alcohol.
But as we're in the thick of the holidays, it's a good reminder to drink responsibly and stay off the roads if you drive to your celebratory destination.
Cheers. Stay safe. And happy holidays.
We've all complained or vented about something in our lives which, in the grand scheme of things, wasn't exactly a problem, or is very easily solved.
Then there are those who complain about things that others almost hope will happen to them at some point in their lives.
These are known as "first world problems", as they are problems that pretty much only the world's one percent faces.
From having to fly business class instead of first class, or being served Roederer instead of Dom Pérignon, these complaints are often met with amusement, bewilderment, or even anger.
Redditor jennimackenzie was curious to hear the most absurd "first world problems" anyone ever complained about, leading them to ask:
"What’s the most ridiculous 'first world problem' you’ve seen people get worked up over?"
"Tale As Old As Time..."
"I once knew a mom who was legitimately devastated, to the point of tears/grief, because a doctor predicted her 8 year old daughter's final height to be around 5'2","
"Which wasn't tall enough to get cast as Belle at Disney World."
"That was the child's (and her mother's) only dream in life, apparently."
"Didn't appreciate my suggestion that she could be Minnie or Mickey."
"Lol!"
"Only a face character would do!"- TravelLovingMom
"Must Be Funny, In A Rich Man's World..."
"My boss from about a decade ago was this insanely rich dude who always went to the bank to get fresh and crisp currency."
"He'd call the bank in advance to make sure they had some on hand."
"I think he was a germaphobe."
"He had a trash can that he'd throw $1 and $5 bills in that he thought was 'dirty' and regularly just donated it vs spending it."
"I asked him why he did this and he said it was too much trouble and asked if I wanted it."
"I said f*ck yeah dumped it into my bag and when I got home it was close to $400 in singles and fives.
"Another time, he wanted to upgrade all the computers in his studio, so we went to a store and bought 10 PCs."
"They all had $150 mail in rebates and he wasn't bothered to go through the trouble of mailing them in."
"3 weeks later I received $1500 after spending a whole afternoon filling out all those goddamn forms."- azninvasion2000
Money Burn GIF by nog
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Who Wore It Better?
"When I was about 19 years old, I was at my boyfriends family BBQ."
"I was wearing this pretty floral sundress."
"His cousins girlfriend showed up in the same dress and she was SO mad that she went and changed."
"I will never understand being upset when someone is wearing the same thing as you.'
"Did you really think that your shirt you bought off the rack is going to be unique to you?"
"No."- mertsey627
Seeing Red! Or Blue In This Case...
"The blue of the balloons wasn't quite the same as the bridesmaid's sashes."
"Years ago my wife and I attended a wedding."
"It was very low key."
"The dinner was in the dining hall at the university where the couple met, cinder block walls and all."
"It was a Baptist wedding - no booze and very serious."
"The dark blue balloons attempting to liven up the hall were a slightly darker shade of blue than the sashes on the bridesmaid's dresses."
"The bride lost here sh*t and absolutely raved for nearly an hour."
"I can't remember how they finally managed to talk her down."- mechant_papa
south park wedding GIF
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See You In Court!
"Rich neighbors who end up in expensive court battles because they disagree about where a tree can be planted or whether the color of a fence fits in with the street’s 'amenity'."
'These disputes get really heated and rack up huge lawyers’ bills."
"The most pathetic part is after the judgement when they are arguing about who should pay the other party’s costs."
"Lots of affidavits filed citing the 'emotional distress' they had to endure, or painting themselves as brave warriors who were forced to take a stand to fight for 'justice'."
"Also lots of pompous litigants insisting that the judge refer to them by their 'Dr' title."
"An absolutely insane dumpster fire of entitled rich people problems."- ElectrocRaisin
It's Always People With Money Who Don't Want To Pay!
"I work in a public library."
"People will get so so mad if they have to be put on a wait list for a book."
"A popular book that just came out."
"Ok our services are not only free but so are the books."
"You’re welcome, a**holes."- Switchbladekitten
A Warm Butt Is A Happy Butt!
"My own."
"We have a bidet toilet seat (Fabulous! Everyone should have one!) and not only does it wash your bum and blow dry it, but the seat's heated!"
"It's shocking how much a heated toilet seat makes the whole process more agreeable."
"Except: We had a power outage and I went to use the toilet and the seat was cold!"
"Unacceptable!"
"This shall not stand!"
"I was really upset because it didn't feel good."
"Then I stopped and thought: This is the most first-world problem anyone's ever had."
"I was really pissed because my heiny was tepid."
"I got over it."- DeathGrover
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Holy Matrimony!
"Weddings are a gold mine for this question."
"People get so hyped up over their 'most important day of their life'."
"They'll destroy friendships, go into debt, and have crazy expectations."
"It's not always the couple who go crazy, either."
"Sometimes, it's the parents or another family member who feels entitled to control the wedding."
"It's just a party."
"Be considerate of guests, have plenty of food and drinks, and enjoy it."- magicrowantree
When Fast Food Isn't Fast Enough...
"Having to pull off to the side to wait for a drive-thru order to be brought out to you because your food isn't ready and there's a line building up behind you."- demanbmore
In Case You Don't Think Customer Service Employees Are Undervalued...
"I was working the return desk at a Target next to a military base so I have so many stories."
"One of my favorites was a lady who had her baby shower before revealing the gender and was livid that she had received floral newborn diapers when she’s having a boy."
"It was a huge box of super expensive, all organic diapers, that we didn’t carry and therefore could not return."
"I cannot accurately express her fury and disgust."
"How dare either suggest her boy could wear feminine diapers."
"I suggested she donate them if she didn’t want to use them and she instead threw away the entire box."
"When she left we pulled it out and threw it in our donate bin."
"There have also been multiple times where mom’s order massive toys and when we bring them out to the car they get furious that they aren’t wrapped."
"We don’t offer wrapping services."
"Here’s the thing, if you don’t want your kids to see the toys you got them for Christmas or their bit to day DON'T BRING THE CHILD WHEN YOU PICK IT UP."
'I’ve had multiple women scream and curse me out that I had ruined their kids Christmas by bringing the toys they ordered out to the car like they requested."- clever-mermaid-mae
Customer Service Waiting GIF by Juno Calypso
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Happiest Place On Earth!
"I used to work for Disney."
"That in itself should tell you everything."
"However for fun I'll give you two specific stories one form our tech department and one from my wife who worked bookings."
"I specifically worked for their call center to help with technical issues with magic band and the website."
"Suddenly got worse huh?"
"A right of passage call everyone has at least one story of is the 'Dome call'."
"Basically there is a subset of Disney Guest (TM) that believes if it rains at Walt Disney world there is someone that will push a button to encapsulate the whole of Disney property in a dome to keep out the rain."
"I'm not kidding."
"If this button is not pushed they call our tech department to angrily ask why."
"My wife worked booking."
"Pretty much everything including Bibbidi Bobbidi boutique and Pirate's league."
"These two things did roughly the same thing difference being price and theme."
"BBB was expensive did more and was focused on princesses, pirates league did a bit less and focused on mermaids and pirates."
"Lady called up my wife, and got pissed about BBB being booked up (It goes FAAAAST)."
"Karen: 'Im going to give the phone to my daughter and I want you to tell her how you are ruining her vacation by not letting her do BBB'."
"Wife proceeds to explain how pirate's league is so much cooler and how she can be a mermaid or pirate and basically gets the kid to start demanding to their parents about how they want to be a mermaid instead of a princess."- trollsong
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The horror!
Being booked into a junior suite at Disney World instead of an executive suite!
It's almost as bad as having no money for groceries, or no food to feed you children...
Said absolutely no one.