You ever just hear someone ask a question and immediately facepalm?
And then you make the grown up choice to take pity on them and explain away exactly what it is that made you facepalm in the first place. What a nice person you are.
u/jojoboz123 asked:
What is the dumbest thing you had to explain to someone?
Here were some of those answers.
It Don't Take A Jean-ius
GiphyThe difference between genes and jeans.
One gets handed down by your parents, the other gets handed down by an older sibling who outgrew them.
Not Understanding Literally Anything
I had to explain to a friend that Amish people know electricity exists, and that they just didn't believe we should use it. I also had to tell her that we generate electricity in power plants, and that it doesn't just float around in the air.
Going After The Ignorance
I used to run a lot of credit checks in my old job. For some reason, people from a specific country failed them about 95% of the time, everyone knew they did. I got really curious one day as to why especially these people are almost always failing the credit checks. i delved deep into google and literally found a published government study, looking into why these specific immigrants were having financial trouble more than any other group.
Turns out, credit, the idea of money other than cash does not exist there. so they have no clue as to how bank credits or credit cards etc work. They don't know about interest etc.
They think someone is just giving them money. And when they come to our country, private moneylenders go after these people specifically, and tell them its almost free money. So they keep getting into huge debt without realising. Government was trying to curb predatory lending and create educational opportunities for these people.
It sounds wild that someone thinks credit cards are free money but apparently there is a whole community out there, completely oblivious and end up getting the worst kind of wake up call after their lives are ruined due to bad credit scores.
...And Sometimes Ignorance Is Bliss
"Why don't, like, North Koreans vote for, like, a better government?"
Back when Kim Jong Il was alive I asked one of more clueless friends if she knew who he was. She responded with "Yeah. He's that asian guy from the Hangover movie." When I bust out laughing she doubled down with "I don't follow pop culture." I had to explain to her that he was the dictator of North Korea which then lead to a follow up explaination that yes, there is a north and a south Korea and no, they are not like north and south Carolina.
We were 25 at the time.
This Is How Keys Work
My company leased a space to a daycare center that came with a storage shed for outdoor toys. One day I got a call from the new manager of the daycare stating that we gave her the wrong keys for the lock on the shed. I was surprised, as we hadn't had any complaints from the previous manager. I told her this and asked her to try them again. She called back the next day and said that the keys weren't correct and she needed a new lock.
At this point I decided to drive across town and check it out. When I got there she was in a bad mood and started complaining about how she shouldn't have to deal with things like this. I apologized for the company and asked her to hand me the key so I could try. She insisted it didn't work, but gave it to me anyway. I walked over to the unit, inserted the key, turned it and the lock sprang open. I actually wasn't expecting this so I just turned to her.
Her response: nobody ever told me that you had to turn the key.
Sloths ARE Real, Brenda
Just because you only have ever seen a duck in the water; doesn't mean that ducks don't fly.
She was 28, and didn't think that sloths were real either.
Angelica, Eliza...And Green Peppers
That the pizza place that I worked at sold pizza... One time a guy was ordering a cheesesteak and said he wanted peppers. I said ok, we have hot, sweet, and green peppers, and asked him which he would like. He responded "angry peppers." I do talk fast so my words tend to blend together sometimes, but it took a good two minutes to explain that there was no such thing as an "angry pepper," and that I was really saying AND GREEN peppers.
Per My Last Email
Me to security guard: "Hi, I am from (Companyname) to do (job). May you contact the Super/Building Manager to let them know I am here?
Security Guard: (Stares blankly for almost 10 seconds.) "Who are you and why are you here?"
Me: (Repeat same greeting word for word.)
Security Guard: (Radios Super/Manager) "(Not the company name I said) is here."
Super/Manager: "Who? I didn't call for them!"
Security Guard to me: "He says you have no business here."
Me: (Internally explodes.)
Some people are just stupid beyond help.
Deleting Major Pieces Of Infrastructure
That you cannot "delete the internet" (I've posted this before.)
Coworker: Can someone come look at my computer? I've deleted the internet.
Me, thinking I'm being trolled: Hur, hur. That's impossible. But nice try.
Coworker throws a fit about how IT people never take him seriously, blah, blah, blah. I go over to check his computer and find he'd deleted the Internet Explorer icon on his desktop.
This Is Why You'll Never Hear The Wolf Cry To The Blue Corn Moon
GiphyPocahontas wasn't created by Disney. This dude was a history teacher.
Most Disney movies, especially the classics, are kid-friendly retellings of old fairy tales that were super not kid friendly to begin with. Little Mermaid is an excellent example of this. The real ending is horrifying.
Don't Tell Him About Pasta
We have a college intern who apparently never had anyone cook for him, so he was confused when I said I made garlic bread for dinner the night before. I explained that if you buy bread, garlic and butter, you can put them together to make your own garlic bread at home. He was flabbergasted.
Punxsutawney WTF?
That the groundhog doesn't actually make the weather get hot or stay cold.
It was groundhogs day that week. She said "I hope the groundhog doesn't see it's shadow because I'm sick of this cold weather." We had like a 30 minute conversation about how that was just a tradition and didn't actually change the weather. She did not believe me.
I also had to tell this girl (a mother of two who has been pregnant more times than that) about menopause and how you have no choice to go through it. "I'm not doing that." was her response.
....Photography
GiphyFriend of mine started working at a garden center. She said she learned that you water the dirt, and not the leaves, she always thought you had to water the leaves. I said, well yeah, photosynthesis. She replied "well sorry I didnt take photography in school like you did!"
.....we were in our 20s.
It Only Takes A Moment
I once had to show a 23 year old how to use a screwdriver. Not an electric, A normal flat head screw driver to take an outlet cover off.
She didn't understand that you have to keep it straight on...
I was in shock, though I tried to hide it. I got the impression that she grew up in a traditional household, where women cook and clean and men did anything mechanical (mow lawn, fix things, hang pictures etc.)
This, But East
Eastern Europe.
Me, college freshman: "My family is from Eastern Europe."
Partygoer: "where's that?"
Me: gestures with hands "So this is Europe"
PFG: "okay"
Me: gestures with right hand "This is Eastern Europe"
I Wasn't Born Yet, So, No?
My dad died in 1989, when I was seven. He was very old, born in 1920, and had served in WW2, something I was pretty proud of as a kid. Several years go by and I end up with an atrocious fifth grade teacher. I wrote a paper about my dad and had to very slowly explain out to her how it was possible that my father was a World War 2 vet. She ended up calling my mom to confirm and still seemed to have her doubts in the classroom. But this wasn't the stupidest thing. One day, during class, she asked me if my dad had died in the war. The war that ended in 1945, a little over three and a half decades before my birth, that war. I explained to her that he had passed away from cancer a few years ago and gently reminded her of my age. And I silently thanked her for telling a classroom full of vicious children that my father was dead, arming the bullies with some very potent taunts. Great work.
You were the absolute worst, Mrs Glodt.
Foods With Textures That People Can't Stomach No Matter How It's Served
Sometimes not liking a food is just a matter of trying it prepared a different way—sautéed instead of boiled, raw instead of cooked, chopped up really small.
But sometimes there's just no way to hide the texture of a particular food and, if you don't like it, it will ruin any dish it's a part of.
Redditor ohnoghostface asked:
"What’s a food that you hate the texture of, no matter how many times you try it?"
Fat
"This is probably a weird answer but fat. I mean the white or kind of clear lard that you can have on meat. It doesn't really taste like anything, but I will gag and probably vomit if I have to eat it. Same with chewy meat."
- HeidiSJ
"The texture is just disgusting.. when you eat a piece of fat and it turns out to be quite hard and rubbery I can't swallow it. Or some sausage that have big chunks of white fat in it.. disgusting. Why am I like this?"
- MissGetClapped
Okra
"Slime isn’t suppose to be okra shaped."
- theWildBore
"My husband Love it.... UGH... I cant even stand the smell!!!"
"But I like Spicy pickled Okra.... its the only way I will eat it, cooked? No Way Jose!!!"
- twinklemylittlestar
Liver
"Liver. It’s always grainy after a couple chews."
- FailedInfinity
"I fail at the smell and flavor of liver long before even getting to the texture."
- DeficientDefiance
Oysters
Oysters
- imrealbizzy2
"i don't like the thought of creamy smooth meat"
- NoAd3038
"Like salty phlegm"
- Tre_Vortni
Lima Beans
"Lima beans, Could never choke ‘em down. Gaggity gag gag."
- IAMABITCORNFUSED
"I'll gaggity gag gag right there with you. Growing up it was, 'No dessert until you eat those lima beans!' Fine, no dessert then. Then it was, 'Just eat 3 lima beans and you can be excused.' Nope, I'll sit here all night. I despise them to this day, at 63."
- shuknjive
Oatmeal
"Oatmeal. I've tried several types and they all make me gag and almost vomit"
- thedevilsgame
"I’m the same. It smells so good, but I just can’t do it."
- 22BreakfastBurritos
"When made as directed it's like wet cardboard. The first time I ever had it as a child I literally gagged."
"I make it once in awhile now but I use MUCH less liquid than directed and then it has a nutty taste. It's hard to get the right proportions though to make it edible so I rarely bother."
- blueberriesnectarine
Pears
"Pears. Too grainy. I can’t get over fruit having that kind of texture when chewing it."
- steelwoman11
"F**k em grainy fruits"
- litromenger
Water Chestnuts
"Water chestnuts. The flavor isn't great, but the texture is awful."
- MacSween3382
"I am glad to have found my person! I never have texture issues with anything else, but water chestnuts make me feel like I'm chewing on glass."
- SitDownShutDown
"Most hated vegetable in a stir fry!"
- MosquitoRevenge
Onion
"Onion. Something about the smoothness of it combined with the crunch just doesn't work. And you can't change my mind."
- Elyaron
"I love the taste of onion, but hate the texture. Like if something is onion flavored (like Indian curry) it's usually great. But the texture just ruins it when I can actually feel it in my mouth while eating."
- appleparkfive
"I recently had some Mac and cheese that had onions in it. Idk what psycho thought that was okay but I hope they lose their job as a cook before they ruin anymore classic dishes with unnecessary ingredients."
- ElevatedDiscGolf
Escargot
"Snails. The first time I tried them the server described them as mushroom-like. I could understand why they said that, but no. Much firmer- almost rubbery- while also being... gooshy. And briney to the point of almost tasting like they went bad. I tried 2 more times thinking they may have just not been made well before I gave it up."
- NewCountryGirl
"They were a fad (where I was anyway) back in the 70s. Every kitchen seemed to have snail cookers and servers of one sort or another. But the unspoken truth was that they mostly served as a vehicle to get the seasoned garlic butter in which they were drenched into your mouth*. They were okay, but I can't say I really know what one tastes like."
"*a slab of baguette sopped up the rest"
- carmium
"Same, not a bad flavour at all but the texture...Shiver"
- TheSmegger
Some foods just aren't for everyone, and food aversions are a very real part of a lot of people's lives.
If someone says they can't eat something, just trust them.
Trying to get them to eat it anyway might have some very unpleasant consequences for all involved.
We have a problem with guns.
Not just America, but humans in general.
Too many lives have been lost.
That's why it's so scary to think about a moment when one is directly pointing at you.
And you lived to tell the tale.
Redditor Vegere wanted to hear from everyone who has come face to face with weaponry and feels like sharing.
So they asked:
"Redditors who had a gun pointed at you, how are you still alive?"
Thankfully I have yet to face a real gun. I pray that continues.
Stop That!
season 2 gun GIF by PortlandiaGiphy"Friend was given a .22 handgun for his 8th-grade graduation. He started waving it around, I said stop that. He said it isn't loaded and pulled the trigger. The bullet went through my hair right above my right ear. Never spoke to that dumba** again."
Bigfoots44
Out of There...
"I was living in a rough neighborhood a couple of years ago. One evening I was walking to the local grocery store when I suddenly walked into this huge dude (195cm and 90kg so I'm not a small person myself). Before I knew it i was surrounded and dragged into an alley and had a gun pointed at me. One of the guys asked me to show an ID."
"At that point I thought they were under cover cops, but them all wearing balaclavas made me doubt that. I showed the my ID and they patted my shoulder, shook my hand and said they're sorry for getting the wrong guy. Then they left. Gangs were basically running that neighborhood and they were most likely looking for someone who owed them money."
"And I must've looked just like that guy. It could've been very traumatic but the fact that they apologized afterward actually made me feel safe lol, and I just shrugged it off. Still glad I'm not living there anymore though."
SnooRobots2119
"Have a nice day"
"Some parts of my country are just chaos. My dad was fixing this telecom tower like usual and I would go with him every once in a while. But this time is different, it was like 11pm and the area we went to is... you could say 'above the law' so the tower is in a mansion and we couldn't find anyone to tell them we're here but you could access the tower so my dad did anyway. After an hour, my dad was done and drove away, it was fine until he noticed 3 cars following us."
"He parks and a bunch of guys with guns walk out of their cars. My dad was chill trying to give them the car key, it's the company car anyways. Then they saw the company's logo on the car and they went 'oh' It was a misunderstanding and they were like 'have a nice day.'"
Utaha_Senpai
No Booze Please
"The person was playing around and thought the gun was unloaded. He pointed it at my head and was about to pull the trigger when my husband, who had been raised to learn that you never, ever point a gun at anyone grabbed it away from him. It turned out the gun was loaded. The person was an alcoholic and forgot that he had loaded the gun last time he got drunk."
Snoo_20029
Sheer Luck
"First time, armed robbery while at work years ago. He just wanted the money from the register so no big deal there. Second time… I didn’t even know a gun was pointed at me. Random shooting, I took a bullet to the back of the head while driving. Alive due to sheer luck."
Floptopus
Guns and people... what a mix.
Not Me
i give up GIF by Venom MovieGiphy"My vehicle fit the suspect description, but I didn't."
insertcaffeine
just missed...
"My dad was screwing around with a rifle pointing it at his sister and to his surprise it went off. It missed her but put a hole through the wall. My dad knew he'd be in trouble when his parents came home so he decided to go to bed early."
"His dad was a scrap iron recycler and was lifting heavy things all day. He could easily do one handed push ups."
"My dad said the next day his dad woke him up and without saying a word, motioned for him to go outside. His dad pointed to a tree. To this day, my dad has no idea how his dad wrapped the rifle around a tree, but there it was."
grewapair
In the Forest
"Years ago , first real job I was in training as a forest ranger and came upon a large group of men night hunting standing by several dead deer ,all were armed and as I exited the vehicle many of the guns were pointed in my direction. In training I was not armed and as they realized it guns were lowered. I was alone, unarmed, outnumbered and should have been writing summonses but I was just glad to leave."
clementine1864
Whoops
"I let the gun holder make the first moves. I didn't talk unless I was addressed first. I didn't move unless I was told to. I didn't try to run or leave until he left.
"And then I peed myself."
somethingsomewhere27
"Similar situation. I was stuck up in college (west Philly) and I just gave the guy what he wanted calmly. He had followed me into my house off campus. He then stole my bike and rode it off."
Pure-Ad2609
Fool
Big Boi Smh GIF by OutkastGiphy"My brother pointed a rifle at me, just fooling around. Aimed the gun down and slid the bolt, found the gun was loaded. He threw up."
1999falcon
I hate guns even more now.
Do you have a harrowing experience of your own to share? Let us know in the comments.
Things Management Of Five-Star Hotels Don't Want You To Know According To Employees
This might not surprise you much but you should never trust the glass in hotel rooms.
A relative of mine refuses to use glasses and would rather drink out of cups she brings with her. She said it was because hotel cleaning staff are so stretched for time that they will clean the glasses with the same rags they'd use to clean the bathrooms.
When she said that, it put me off using glasses put out in hotel rooms ever again.
But that's not the only horror story from the land of hotels, five star or otherwise.
People shared their stories with us after Redditor catstevenseagal asked the online community:
"People who work at 5-star hotels: what type of s**t goes on that management doesn’t want people to know?"
"Every single hotel..."
"Bedbugs. Every single hotel from run-down motels to 5-star resorts has dealt with bedbugs."
Soulilkeether
My worst nightmare. I dealt with them once and never, ever want to deal with them again.
"Our concierge..."
"Our concierge was Les Clefs D'or, had all the connections, this dude could get you into the French Laundry same day. He would often greet guests with sangria and sprigs of mint from his garden. Sometimes he had lemon slices from his tree too! He loved to tell guests all about his garden and they ate it up.
Yeah, that's all BS. Mint, lemon, and any other garnish we got from the local grocery store. The sangria? Cheapest boxed stuff we could find. But he sold the story like no other. At the end of the day, it worked."
Duwinayo
It's all about the image.
Guests at these fancy hotels might need to think twice about what they're paying for.
"Some were greeted..."
"We weren't allowed to greet celebrities by name since they wanted to be anonymous, so we would use their alias that day. Some were greeted by sex workers who were always super nice to everyone. A regular would rent out a room for a day, once a month, and make 30-40k that day from clients. Celebrities, business guys, you name it. Crazy."
Mubly
You've got to respect the hustle.
"I worked at one of the premier hotels at a ski resort in the country; top 10. Met celebrities, royalty, politicians, athletes."
"Hockey players are the nicest athletes by a wide margin. Royalty is great or more likely, awful. A-list celebrities want to be left alone or treated as just another person. Politicians are bigger aholes when they're with their families. Saw lots of sex, drugs, underage drinking, sex workers, the usual."
pdx4nhl
Duly noted. I will only hang out with hockey players from now on.
"In some places..."
"Dead people. In some places, there's a reasonable chance somebody has died in your bed. Obviously, it varies with the type of hotel and its clientele, but in some places you get deaths weekly (not that the hotel is unsafe but you have unfit old people over-exerting themselves). One place I worked maybe 40% of the beds had been died in."
KaneMomoa
I suppose this shouldn't come as a surprise. People die anywhere and everywhere all the time. Hotels are no different.
"What goes on..."
"What goes on in the room next to you. This week we had to evict and arrest a couple for causing over $15K in damages to a room. This was done quietly late at night and the nearby rooms never found out."
counterslave
When done correctly... no one will ever know.
These businesses have a reputation to uphold. They're not about to let something like that come out and make the news.
"NEVER EVER EVER..."
"NEVER EVER EVER (I REPEAT!!) USE A CHOCOLATE FOUNTAIN FROM A HOTEL OR BANQUET HALL!!!"
UnusualForm3237
Okay, okay! I believe you! I'm not going to do it!
Nor would I...
"Middle eastern royalty..."
"Middle eastern royalty ships in multiple Ferraris and Lamborghinis to the hotel from their home country to drive for the week; caught drag racing later that night by the cops in the neighborhoods of Beverly Hills."
candybarkiller
Middle eastern royalty is truly a different specimen altogether.
"A lot of lonely people..."
"A lot of lonely people going on vacation to end their life. Happens a lot but is never mentioned on the news."
Cool-Lemon-662
In quite a few states, there is an actual law for this. They must check.
"Worked at the high end restaurant at a ski resort that hosts a famous film festival. Lots of sex in the walk in coolers, but never the people you'd want to walk in on."
[deleted]
Oh dear.
Not that you'd join... that would be quite unprofessional.
Ask any of the hotel staff to share some stories with you the next time you stay somewhere. What they tell you might surprise you... or disturb you.
Have stories of your own? Feel free to share them with us in the comments below!
If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).
To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/
As teenagers, most ambitious pre-adolescents looked forward to life beyond high school where the freedom for them to live their lives without the supervision of parents or guardians awaited them.
But when they barreled through phases of teen angst, obtaining driver's licenses, and finally being able to see an R-rated movie without sneaking into one, nothing could really prepare them for adulting.
Being told how to be an adult is one thing. Navigating through adulthood on your own, however, can be a very sobering experience.
Curious to hear of the trials and tribulations from strangers online, Redditor bathtub_seizure asked:
"What is an adult problem you were not prepared for?"
First, there are the responsibilities.
Finding Work
"The utter soul crushing search for a job."
– MaxTheSoccerDog
Series Of Unfortunate Events
"Same. I was out of work for years due to severe illness, then spent 8 months looking for any job possible but getting rejected everytime. I finally got 2 interviews lined up in April then coronavirus hit and they got cancelled! I cannot catch a break..."
– tickleapicl
Better Than The Alternative
"Not being able to leave a job you hate because you might just become homeless without it."
– Go_J
Then comes the pain and suffering.
People Come And Go
"Losing people. Loved ones passing away is the hardest. Then there’s the nasty breakdown of personal relationships, family relationships and friendships. Then there’s the sad drifting apart that happens when life takes you on a different path to a person you were once really close to."
– BlackCaaaaat
You're On Your Own, Kid
"Realizing that not even your parents have all the answers. And finally understanding that they were just figuring it out as they went just like we are."
"Not having an all knowing figure to give you the answers to all your problems is the pits and I hate it."
"Edit: just wanted to add that I agree figuring stuff out for yourself is rewarding and fun, but some things you really dont want to figure out for yourself, or cant figure out. And for those things it's nice to have someone to point you in the right direction."
– Snow_Da_92
The Physical Limitations Set In
"Pain."
"Arthritis is f'king horrible and early onset autoimmune arthritis is worse than just having an ache in one or two joints. I hurt all the time, everywhere, and everyone just assumes you're faking it or you're a pill popper. I am not going to live another 20 years with this pain like my dad did."
– porcelina99
Pain Doesn't Discriminate
"I don't have arthritis but I do have other issues that I end up having to use a cane for sometimes at 28 years old and I get the "you're too young for that" a lot, it drives me up a wall. Like, thanks, you've cured me, I hadn't considered I may be too young for this! If only I'd known it was that easy!"
– tarotwitchneona
Sleepless Nights
"Not being able to sleep due to stress. Yet here I lay, exhausted but wide awake."
"When I was younger I could sleep anytime, anywhere."
– JonnyWax
There are a slew of responsibilities these Redditors never saw coming.
Basic Adulting
"Being able to not cook the same meal everyday while balancing hundreds of other tasks. I will always admire my mom for how she was able to cook, have a clean house, work 43 hours and help her children do homework all while taking time to work out at the end of everyday."
"I could mention other common problems like money management and common tasks that I haven't mastered, but what really hit me like a train was the actual transition of adulthood. Im talking about having to make my own appointments and having to keep tabs on myself instead of handing every single document to my mom. I realized how unorganized I was when I found my birth certificate in the same drawer where i have junk receipts."
– IrisNalvo
Role Reversal
"Dealing with your parents acting like children."
– rchaw
Being The Host
"Having a presentable place, and debating myself on why it matters. It always frustrated me when my parents had a guest over and we had to deep clean the whole house. Like if it’s my close friend of 8 years visiting, why do I care what they care about my cleanliness? And yet, every time people are over I find myself cleaning the apartment up for some reason."
– slothbarns7
Didn't we all feel invincible as youngsters?
I was rambunctious, physically active, and I hardly ever felt like I was going to run out of steam.
Yet, here we are. I can barely get up out of bed without hearing a snap, crackle, and pop from all of my joints.
I was cognizant of the eventual physical breakdown of my body taunting me from the distant horizon. But nothing could prepare me for the velocity at which this phase of my life would arrive and slap me hard in the face.
Life can be so cruel.