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There's a lot of "time honored" traditions which, upon further thought, are sort of silly.

Why is it considered the man's job to ask the woman out? This ideas gives weight to the idea men are the only ones in control of the relationship, removing women from any sort of control instead of it being a mutual bond. In reality, it shouldn't matter who asks whom out, but some men would like to offer their thoughts about what would happen if/when a woman decides to take charge of her own life.

Reddit user, u/icedcoffee_with_milk, wanted to know what it's like to be courted when they asked:

How do you guys feel about women asking you out?

Sometimes the reasoning is simple, easy to process, and totally sensible.

Nothing Like That Good Feeling

"Flattered, it feels good when a woman likes you and actually has the guts to ask you out"


Putting That Extra Spring In Your Step

"I feel extremely flattered. A woman expressing even a slight interest in me or complimenting me keeps me happy, validated and confident for weeks"


Be Open And Honest From The Start

"I had two experiences in my life where a woman I was talking to told me that she was in love with me and couldn't imagine a life where we weren't dating. It was awesome that they said something. It set a tone for the entire relationship, where I could know that this girl would be totally honest with me."

"Even though those relationships ended, I can't help but smile at the feeling it brought when they first came onto me."


There can be more complicated reasons behind the feelings of men. While it'd be nice to be asked, it could have major ramifications on the psychology of their dating life going forward.

It's Possible To Miss Out On All The Cues

"My S.O thought I wanted to befriend him when I asked him out. (Knew him mutually for a few years) Took him 2 hours to figure out that we were having a date."


"I'm picturing you two having dinner or something when the light bulb finally turns on, stops mid-bite and looks at you with a look of mixed horror and realization "Holy sh-t, is this a date?!"


Don't Be This Jerk

"Has never happened, and to be honest I'd feel as if someone is pranking me if it ever happens."


"Had happened to me and I felt like it. Tbh, I had a real self-esteem problem, but this cute girl said she likes me and I thought it was a jokingly "let's be friends" thing... Months later, when I couldn't do anything about it, I learned the truth..."

"My answer to OP is doing it so it's normalized and we don't feel like that anymore, and also explain to the person (if they seem clueless) that this is not a prank"


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When You Need It To Boost Your Motivation

"Holy sh-t, yes please."

"I'd feel a lot better about myself if I thought people saw me as a potential romantic partner and not simply background noise. I mean, I usually prefer to be background noise for most things because I don't like lots of attention, but an occasional ask would do a lot for my motivation to take care of myself and actually look for a partner instead of just throwing myself into my work."

"If it wasn't a random thing from a person I don't know and was coming from a friend or friendly acquaintance, there's a very good chance I'd accept."


But, really, what person wouldn't enjoy being asked out? You're essentially being told you're desirable enough for a person to push forward and ask you to enter into a romantic bond.

Just. Do. It.

"Do it. Please do it."


"I'm 110% with you. I'm no good at it myself, and I really think at this rate I'll be 85 and still never have been on a date unless a girl makes the first move at some point."


Seriously. Some Men Need The Help.

"Do it, please! Just say words. We are clueless. Subtlety may get you ignored by us oblivious idiots."


"We are men, we are the big dumb. We no word good"


What Does The Topic Of Discussion Think About It?

"Woman here. I asked a guy out recently by text (he's a former uni friend). He wasn't interested, but said he appreciated my openness about it. And I appreciated that he gave me an honest, straightforward answer. Nice interaction all in all. I was hella nervous though (got social anxiety) but thought that at least he gets a nice compliment."

"That's just my experience, but generally speaking I think women should go for it. Asking someone out takes guts and the 'burden' of that shoudn't be on the men only."


Don't let outdated rules hold you back from what you want. Want the guy? Go for it. Don't waste any time.

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