People Who Married In Their Early 20s Explain Whether They Regret Their Decision Or Not
There are so many cultural narratives about "being in your 20s."
We're supposed to explore, travel, educate ourselves, meet people, try new things and "get life experience," whatever that means.
But in the same breathe, people tell us we're not kids anymore, so we need to grow up, find a decent job, focus on career development, handle personal finances wisely, and consider the long view.
All the different advice is enough to make the head spin.
So it's no surprise that marrying early is a rather loaded concept. Choosing to tie the knot before 25 is a big commitment made a young age, there is no doubt about it.
A recent Reddit thread illustrated that while the decision is definitely not for everyone, it worked for plenty of folks out there.
sonOfTheSun28 asked, "People that married early (between 20-25), how has it impacted your life, do you regret it or was it the best decision you ever made?"
All Worked Out
"I was 25, she was 23. It's been 10 years that we formed a couple, and 6 years married. She's currently on the PC, and I'm watching over our 7 months old baby."
"Pretty good decision to marry her."
"Diplomacy"
"Got married at age 18. Still married to the same man at age 70. 51 years of diplomacy 💕" -- Dobba1969
"I can't wait to get here. My husband and I got married at 19/20, we are now both 27 and going strong. Been together since we were 15." -- bindsaybindsay
The Right Choice
"No regrets. Been married since I was 24, I'm 50 now. Best. Woman. Ever. IMO." -- keltoy1549
"Early? I was 25 and thought it was kinda' late."
3 plus decades later, still laughing and enjoying married life. Here's some unsolicited advice; find someone who not only laughs at your jokes, but makes you laugh just as much. And have as many kids as you can afford, because they give you pure joy." -- originalmango
A Seamless Flow
"My husband and I got married when we were both 23. We had already been living together for years, had combined finances, etc. so we had basically been married beforehand anyway."
"We went to the courthouse and got married by a justice of the peace. Then we went back to our apartment and back to our lives."
"Literally nothing changed lol. We're still very happy and own a home now with 2 dogs, so I'd say it worked out for us so far. Our 4th wedding anniversary will be in January."
-- glowbaby
Other Factors Besides Age
"I have one friend who married his high school sweetheart when they were 18. They have 3 children and seem very happy and content. He is always talking about how much he loves his wife."
"I have another friend who married his college girlfriend once he graduated and hit 21. They moved to California and only lasted 2 years before he found out she was cheating on him. He has said numerous times that it was one of the biggest mistakes he has ever made."
"I guess it all depends on you, and the other person..."
-- Stevie-Avail
A Tumultuous Decade
"We were 23 and 24 when we married, we had been together for 3 years then. That was 12 years ago, currently we are sipping coffee together while he plays a game and I browse reddit. He is hands down the best decision of my life."
"That being said, it wasn't easy especially in the beginning. It's been a lot of hard work and raw emotion getting to where we are today. We agree that that age range is a bit young and somewhat foolish to decide to marry, though sometimes it works."
"There's so much growth that takes place between 20-30, we were fortunate to grow together instead of apart."
-- SlackAsh
The Other Side
"It was stupid. Wish I hadn't. I regret it to this day."
"Wrecked my life - she's got psychological problems and decided to ditch me a couple of months after marriage."
Inarguable Outcomes
"I got married at twenty five. It lasted ten years or so. I can't regret it, because it produced the best daughter a guy could ever want."
"That alone makes me a man wealthy beyond measure."
-- stupidlyugly
Constantly Evolving
"I was 24 so at the top end of your spectrum but yes, in all honesty, I regret it."
"I am a completely different person now with new ideas, new goals, new views on marriage itself. I didn't give myself enough time to 'find myself' even though I had lived on my own for 6 years at the time."
"I wish I had waited until at least 30 or never gotten married at all. This is stuff my husband knows, we've talked about it a lot. It's not about him at all, it's about how I've changed."
"He hasn't changed along with me - I mean, he has changed of course (been married 17 years), but not in the same ways I have. That isn't a criticism of him at all, just the way it is."
-- DTownForever
Living Alone is Pretty Wonderful
"We got married when we were 18. It's been 20 years, and we've had a few rough patches, but I only have one regret. I'm almost 40, and I've never lived alone."
"I feel like we both missed out on an important part of growing up by not having that experience."
-- froggiehud
Be Ready
"I was 22, but my husband was 28. He's definitely one of the good ones. It's been 10 years, and he's still my best friend."
"However, I wouldn't recommend getting married young, or at all, if you aren't committed to communicating through the hard times and fighting for your marriage, because the hard times will come."
Lukewarm
"Started dating at 19, married at 24, divorced at 39."
"I don't know. Both she and I are in much better places now. I'd say it was a learning experience; but it was also an experience experience..."
"I don't regret my relationship with her. I regret how much we both let it drag on during some really passionless and tense years at the end. The last 7 years of our marriage we were basically room-mates."
-- boxed_monkey
No Rush
"It was the worst decision I ever made, and I do regret it. We got divorced. Just don't be in such a rush. You can always get married a little later!" -- queennbee
"I just don't plan on getting married at all. I believe in committed relationships, but people can change and/or situations can change. 1 year down the line, 10 years, etc. and the end will usually suck, but complicating it even more with divorce proceedings just seems like a good thing to avoid." -- QuasarsRcool
Thrilled as Ever
"Best decision of my life. I was 21. She was 20. We're mid 50s now and still happily together. 3 kids, 5 grandkids, and we're blessed with (or fortunate to have) enough health to enjoy them all."
"The way I see it, I married someone way too good for me, but she doesn't seem to realize it. Shhhh! Please don't tell her! I've got a great thing going here!"
-- blibbidyblam
20/20 Hindsight
"I was 17 and he was 20 when we got married. I had always been sheltered by my parents so didn't know how to make such life choice. I definitely married the wrong person. I thought I loved him but didn't really know what love was or what to expect."
"We were married for 4 years when I called it off. I just couldn't take anymore of his controlling crap. I married my parents so to speak."
External Factors
"I was with my husband at age 16, we got married at 20. We split up when I was 30. I don't regret it, we had a good 10 years of love that were actually nearly perfect."
"But then he got into heroin. That sucks the soul out of people. Say no to drugs, everyone."
Something More Important Than Timing
"Best. Second best was to not have kids."
"But it wasn't the "early" part that was or is important."
"The important question is 'is this the right person to spend the rest of your life with?'"
"If you have any reservations, it's not the right time. For you."
-- michaelh98
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Men Break Down The Weirdest Things Someone's Ever Said To Them After Sex
"Reddit user ella-es-julia asked: 'Men Break Down The Weirdest Things Someone's Ever Said To Them After Sex'"
People say the darndest things after -- and sometimes during -- lovemaking.
Maybe it's the euphoria.
Maybe it's the adrenaline.
Maybe it's the tequila.
It's always good to have a kind-hearted joke on hand or a generic compliment.
Or maybe just grab your belongings and skedaddle.
Redditor ella-es-julia wanted to hear about the craziest pillow talk stories, so they asked:
"Men of Reddit: What's the weirdest thing a girl said to you after sex?"
The weirdest I ever got was... "What city am I in again?"
Geography matters.
Morbid Much?
In Bed Home GIFGiphy"Met girl, went on date, brought girl home, had the sex, finished the sex, laying there she says 'What would you do if I died right now?' and demanded an actual answer."
Vixxay
Meow
"Not to me, but as she walked over to the bathroom after the deed, she said 'I just did your owner' to my cat. Sexiest thing that ever happened to me."
shlanky369
"My Fiancé and I were about to start going at it when the cat appeared from under the bed and stared at me. I went, 'Babe the cat is here. I don't like how he's staring at my boobs."
"Fiancé grabbed the cat and yeeted him into the hallway with the phrase, 'Get out you weird pervert.'"
"The cat proceeded to (without his claws) smack the door over and over again while screaming for a few minutes straight. Pervert."
Trumpet6789
POP!
"'I need you to take me to the hospital. Something is now bleeding and hurts.'"
"Turns out her ovarian cyst popped. We're still together with the running joke of sex so good it put her in the ER."
DasBatt
"Ah ah ah, 2 hemorrhagic cysts ruptured, I was bleeding internally, but only a little bit. I'm still impressed by how quickly you went from a naked sex stupor to being ready and carrying me to the car. Good times."
"In the ER when they asked me what happened all I could do was shout 'we were f**kin!' through my tears. That memory still makes me laugh."
Straystar-626
Damn it's Good
"We were going at it for some time then her face went instantly from 'damn it's good' to full-on crying. I stop, ask her what's wrong and she tells me 'I can't cheat on my boyfriend, it is wrong.'"
"So this is when I learned that the girl that I met on a dating website and that I started seeing 3 weeks before and that she told me she was single had a boyfriend for over 5 years. Got her to talk more, and she told me she was on the dating website to see if there were guys better than her boyfriend so she could end up with someone better."
"This was like 20 years ago, a coworker I have right now knows her (his girlfriend is like a distant relative of hers) and I learned she had 5 different boyfriends since then, cheated on all of them except the last one (for now). She was also a cam model in secret, one of the boyfriends was a high-paying customer."
draftstone
A Binding Contract
"'Pleasure doing sex business with ya.' We then shook hands."
"Still together 5 years later!"
Tatarstan
It's nice when people who have great sex make great partners.
And it all starts with a handshake.
Sleep on It
“'I don’t usually say this but, yeah, you can stay.'"
lennyukdeejay
"Did you high-five after that? Seems like that statement called for it."
EvilNinjaX24
"This is the best one."
TomKhatacourtmayfind
Tiny Dancer
"Not really weird but I slept with this girl while backpacking Asia, she was also a backpacker. After a bit of chillin'/talking, I got up to get dressed, she looked at my flaccid manhood and said 'You're quite shy when you're not excited.' I thought it was hilarious."
fleetwoodsackk
"That's a much better way to put it. My wife, when we were just dating and had moved in together and eventually saw it flaccid just said 'Aww, it's so little.' Thanks, hun, exactly what every guy wants to hear."
striker180
Fine!
"She said 'If I get pregnant I'm keeping it.' I was dumbfounded and when I didn't respond quickly enough she got really agitated like I had hurt her feelings and yelled 'Fine! You don't have to be involved if you don't want to!'"
"We had just met that night. My condom use skyrocketed after that night."
Fullyme
"When I was a poverty-stricken college student I was banging a girl who said, 'If you get me pregnant I’ll take you for everything you own.' I said, 'All I own is my bicycle. You want that?'”
OrwellWasRight101
Amen
"Best weird compliment I ever got was 'Damn boy, you f**k like the Devil!'"
"I married her, we still goin' at it."
BeBearAwareOK
Well, these certainly created some lasting relationships... or hilarious tales to tell their friends.
Do you have any stories to share? Let us know in the comments below.
The Absolute Weirdest Compliments People Have Ever Received
Giving compliments is pretty easy, although most of us don't do it often enough.
Accepting compliments can be much harder.
Too many of us immediately shift into disclaimers to explain why we don't deserve the praise.
But we just need to say thank you—even if the compliment is a little odd.
Reddit user callmejari asked:
"What's the weirdest compliment you have received?"
Zzzzz...
"Someone once told me that my voice was so soothing, it could put a crying baby sloth to sleep."
~ Marena-Cris-18
GiphyWhat About My Sneeze?
"'Your cough sounds nice' Was just a random girl on the train."
"Still throws me off 2 years later."
~ ThatGothDinosaur
GiphyHope It’s Not SpongeBob
"A 5-year-old kid told me he liked me because I looked like a cartoon."
~ Sea_Ganache620
GiphyUnfulfilled Potential
"I have nice wide birthing hips."
"I'm a guy."
~ kudzufarmer
"You got the foundation for it, you're just missing the plumbing."
~ ARoundForEveryone
GiphyWrong Hemisphere, But Thanks
"When I was 16 working the drive thru—'You’re the prettiest Arabic girl I’ve ever seen'."
"I’m Mexican. But thank you ma’am."
~ 3sp00py5me
GiphyWas His Name Vlad?
"'You've got beautiful veins'."
"By the guy that injected my contrast before an MRI."
~ Reblax837
Werner Herzog Halloween GIF by Arrow VideoGiphyIt Keeps My Teeth In Place
"Some random NYC man told me I had a nice chin once. I still think about him."
~ pssht07070707
GiphyNever Skip Leg Day
"I was told by a woman walking behind me on stairs that I had great calves."
"It was kind of weird at the time."
~ Sider-Pride
Not The BBQ Ones
"'I like your ribs'."
"From random girl at a pool party during a music festival."
~ Particular-Natural12
GiphyCleaning Up On Aisle 5
"I delivered bread to grocery stores in the 90’s and when I decided to change routes, the young lady who had always checked me in told me she’d really miss the sound of my voice."
~ OGGBTFRND
GiphyBloody Offal
"One time I was at the doctor for some lower back pain getting an ultra sound and the tech looked me dead in the eye and said 'You have really nice kidneys. They're very plump.'"
"Best strange compliment I ever received."
~ FlashRage
A compliment is a compliment, right?
What's the weirdest compliment you've received?
Reasons People's Friends Remain Single That They Don't Have The Heart To Tell Them
We can all agree that, as fun as it's supposed to be, the dating scene can be really, really hard.
Here's the secret: as hard as the dating scene can be to navigate, some of the trouble lies with us. We may not to be able to find a long-term partner or a date at all because of something that we're doing.
But when a friend is in this situation, it can be really hard to tell them the brutal truth about their dating history.
Redditor teekzer asked:
"What is causing your friend to remain single that you don't have the heart to tell them?"
Chasing Deadends
"He keeps hanging on to the past and spending all his time hanging out with ex-girlfriends who are unavailable, or women who like him but he doesn’t romantically like."
- SqueakySnapdragon
Baby Talk
"I always wondered why she couldn't get a date because she is gorgeous until I saw her flirting with someone."
"The first night they met, flirted, and swapped numbers. Then, she was immediately clingy, talking in a baby voice to him, and making baby noises."
- robocop_robocop
Body Odor
"I can smell them. Everyone can smell them."
- not-read-gud
"You should find a way to tell them, it might hurt but they'll appreciate it."
- iciclesnbdayclothes
The Nice Guy Mindset
"He really is not as nice of a person as he thinks he is."
- Rusti3dp
"The ones who claim this rarely are."
- SummerOfMayhem
Impossible Standards
"The people they like aren’t real. They are idealized, cartoonish caricatures. Now my friend himself has a lot to offer in my opinion, but he is looking for a person who doesn’t exist. Hard to find something that’s not there."
- Sufficient-Spell9935
"I have a friend who started dating his flatmate after being really into her for a while, and then after a week or two said something like, 'Dating you doesn't feel as good as I thought it would,' TO HER."
"He basically torpedoed his own potential relationship because of his own ideal fantasy, and to be honest, I don't know if he actually realized he'd created an unrealistic standard in his own head."
"He's been single for the last decade, his mental health has only got worse in the time I've known him despite therapy, and I think he's probably so detached from 'appropriate dating behavior' at this point that he could be single for the rest of his life."
- fish993
Questionable Humor
"Brother-in-law, not friend. But he makes the same jokes about poop and farts all the time. Like, constantly."
"Yes, some women like potty humor, but they usually also want it to be funny."
"He is also very negative; finds insult or something wrong with any situation."
- EatYourCheckers
Living in Fantasy Land
"He lies to himself about almost everything. He lives in fantasy land."
"He thinks he's in the gym five days a week, eats great, climbs mountains, goes camping, and makes loads of money."
"In reality, he's at the pub five days a week, over eats like s??t, went on one hike in January, can't hold a job, and lives paycheck to paycheck..."
"If you were to confront him with this reality, it wouldn't even get through to him."
- Fit_Yogurtcloset_291
Mismatched Attraction
"The type of guys she claims she likes isn't what she's actually attracted to."
"She keeps saying how much she loves shy introverted sensitive guys but when she finds one and dates him suddenly, she's like, 'He's not outgoing enough, doesn't speak his mind enough, and is too shy!'"
"I kind of think she has this 'I can fix him' syndrome and doesn't really acknowledge it. Like, she's attracted to the idea of a typical shy guy but thinks once they're in a relationship they'll suddenly be more open and turn into the guy she actually wants. That's not how it works!"
- Disig
Poor Self-Esteem
"She is so lovely. So kind, so generous, and so beautiful. But her crippling lack of self-esteem is so huge, it's visible from space, and her anxiety (and I'm 99% sure her undiagnosed ADHD) means that when she's at all nervous, she talks at 100 miles an hour in several directions at once."
"It's like being handed eight happy Labrador puppies to try and hold in your arms. I so badly want her to be happy and feel fulfilled but even I find it tiring sometimes."
- butwhatsmyname
The Negative Attitude
"I have two of these."
"One is the most talented, smartest, wonderful person I know and I wish I could pull the gremlins out of their brain so they could be happy."
"The other is self-fulfilling proficiency f**king up their life. He's not unlovable, or ugly, or uncared for, but walking through the world expecting rejection at all turns and living in a fog of negativity is what makes him unattractive to be around."
"So-and-so isn't hotter than you, that's not the reason they're getting more friends and lovers, but they are more positive and interested than you, and people are attracted to that company."
- cool_username_iguess
Just Pure Arrogance
"For my husband’s friend, it’s the selfish arrogance. I want what I want, and the subtext was that he never cared about what his girlfriend wanted."
"He would only go places he wanted to go, which never included her friends or family. He wanted to spend all his money on 'collectibles' related to sci-fi movies, DVDs, figurines etc."
"Engagement rings were a waste of money, investing, or buying a house ditto, no compromises were possible, he said NO, and no discussions were entertained."
"His opinion on every topic was the correct one, and he was not interested in your opinion, or listening to extra facts he did not know that might change his mind."
"He was once young and good-looking, and he thought he could find someone else when she walked when he was 32. They had dated for close to a decade. During the relationship, he had started to stack on the weight and losing his hair and he was not able to find a replacement."
"Now he is 49 and hasn’t had a girlfriend since. He still has not bought a house and they cost double what they did when they were dating, and his rent has tripled. He does have a copy of all his favorite movies in every format: VHS, DVD, AND BlueRay, a whole bedroom is dedicated to storing them, if you can get in there. His house is a hoarder's paradise."
"He says the reason no one wants him is because he is fat and bald, and it does not help, but it’s not the major turnoff."
"As for his ex, I don't really know what happened to her. She left all of us behind when they broke up. I did hear she got married, but no updates after that. She is a sweetheart, I wish all the good things for her."
- vicki153
Impossible to Move Forward
"Summarizing two types of my single friends:"
"Super successful, smart, funny, and good-looking. They also tend to go for folks who leave them on read for days. Their insecurities are their worst enemies and I think are the biggest factor of them chasing after partners who don’t want to be partners."
"Other friends don’t know how to commit to anything, including a job. It almost feels like a 'it’ll happen when it happens' type of ideology and so they don’t even try to make things happen? They act like things will happen on their own? So they’ll meet a person and then that’s it. Meet cute dead in the water."
- thunderkitty_
Too Desperate
"Desperation. From laughing way too hard at mediocre jokes to bringing up marriage on the first date, she reeks of it."
"We have all tried talking to her about it to no avail. The sad thing is that if she was just her regular funny, smart, relaxed self, then men would be falling over themselves trying to get her number."
- Julia_Sugarbaker123
A Want List
"Her standards are excessively too high. She brings nothing to a relationship. She's a walking contradiction, all of which is why she is single."
"I think it's great to have standards and high standards but hers is just a checklist of wants."
- Theunpolitical
Height Insecurities
"He’s convinced women won’t like him because he’s short. I keep telling him I know plenty of guys just as short as him in great relationships, I’ve dated guys as short as him in the past. He just refuses to believe it."
- MichaSound
"I dated a guy who was four feet, nine inches, and I'm five feet, four inches. He had such an amazing strong personality that you never noticed his height."
"I did find kissing standing up weird; the motions are so different when it's swapped."
"The relationship ended for other reasons than his height."
- lonelyronin1
Alternatively, Open to Feedback
"I had a friend who finally did just ask. He came up to the girls in our group and just let us have an open conversation. I'm sure it was awkward and uncomfortable for him, but we gently laid out some issues. He cut his hair, got some new clothes, and (the big one) started therapy."
"A couple of years later, guess who's got a wife and a wonderful child?"
- Stars-in-the-night
It's so disheartening to see the people we care about unable to have something that they would find so fulfilling like a long-term relationship.
But it's even worse when the reasons behind it are things they could work on, if we only had the guts to tell them or if they were open to hearing it.
People Share The Craziest Things That Are Somehow Legal In Certain Countries
As foreigners who travel, it's easy to be overcome by culture shock while taking in the sights of different countries.
But we may behave in ways that are completely normal for us back home but are not acceptable in the places we're visiting.
Which makes sense.
There are rules and restrictions we should be aware of before we arrive in a foreign country.
Redditor fittingpenguin solicited input from strangers online to weigh in on conflicting international rules by asking:
"What’s the craziest yet still legal thing in your country?
You probably didn't know these were actual rules.
No Complaining
"A direct ancestor/descendant or spouse of an individual cannot file a theft complaint against that individual except if it's essential documents, like an ID."
– ObjectiveMountain900
Who's The Baby Daddy?
"I always thought the paternity test one was worse for France. Your not allowed to perform one even if you've good suspicion the child may not be yours and you could be liable to child support for another person's kid."
– SoloWingPixy88
Bees Take The Lead
"In Germany, you are allowed to enter private property to follow your honey bee swarm if the swarm is escaping and looking for a new hive."
– lizaahunn
"this is actually the case in lots of countries, where I am they can legally enter your yard to come to get them."
– WRA1THLORD
Things get very specific and downright shocking.
Gotta Be Pitch-Perfect
"In Belgium, anybody can sing or play an instrument in the Streets. In the city of Leuven however, you can be fined if you play your instrument off-key."
– Zuid-Dietscher
"To be fair to Leuven, with all the students running around doing it, I don't blame them."
– Blasmere
Careful The Things You Say
"Someone can be found guilty of defamation even if what that person said or wrote is 100 percent true."
– EHonda92m
"Japan. e.g. if you expose someone for having an affair, that person can sue you for defamation. I suppose it's an expectation of privacy. The only exception is if it's in the "public interest" to know this information."
– TheOvy
Everyone's Playground
"You can freely walk, bike or ski in the nature on any private property. As long as it's not counted as a breach of domestic peace or you are not ruining their crop field or something. For example, even though you see a sign 'private property' in the forest. You are free to go pick mushrooms and berries there. Or you can even fish there freely (only with basic worm fishing rod though) if there's a lake on the property. You can even set up a tent on someone's private property for a short time (1-2 nights) as long as you aren't littering or disturbing anyone for example being noisy or on the way. The country is Finland, and these things are in the Finnish constitution as 'every man's/everyone's rights.'"
– RamuPamu1
What happens if you break the law? There doesn't seem to be consequences here.
Prison Break
"I don't know if it's really crazy, I personally think it's good and reasonable, but here in germany it's not punishable to escape from prison."
"Of course in reality they might charge you with other things like property damage or assault etc. if you damage something or someone on the way out but the act of breaking out itself can't prolong your sentence because the need to be free is a fundamental human desire."
– PetrosiliusZwackel
The Warden's Story
"I watched a doc on European prisons some years back and in a Croatian prison they talked to the warden. He told a story about a man who escaped. A week or so after the escape the prison received a package containing the man’s prison uniform."
"Since he had committed no crimes while escaping (just walked out the doors) and while an escapee, the only thing they could have charged him with was stealing his prison uniform. But since he returned it, there was nothing to charge and he just had to finish out his original sentence."
– CornyCornheiser
Leaving Civilly Is Not A Crime
"Basically, the normal rules of society apply. If you punch a guard to get past them, that's still a crime. If they leave you unattended with the door open or you sneak out under a lorry, that isn't a crime. They can still catch you and return you, but you can't be charged with attempted or successful escape, just any crimes committed in the process."
– Death_God_Ryuk
It's The Soldiers' Call
"Also Germany, soldiers are allowed to disobey orders if they think it violates human dignity. There are other nations with similar rules or even obligations regarding human rights and violation of geneva convention, but protecting even their own dignity is unique (I think)"
– f_cysco
This doesn't have legal consequences but slurping noodles at the dinner table is perfectly acceptable in Japan.
As a matter of fact, the Japanese encourage it.
The Japanese believe that eating noodles while they're piping hot is the best way to enjoy them.
Also, what is perceived as rude etiquette in other countries is actually a sign of validation that the cook prepared the dish well.