People Break Down The Funniest Tattoo Mistranslations They've Ever Seen

Tattoos written in a language not spoken by the wearer are not uncommon.
People like to have a mysterious mark that they can claim is deeply significant for them, and yet you have no idea what it even means.
But the inky exoticization can backfire. In fact, for many people out there, it did backfire.
Whether it was the workings of a snarky tattoo artist or the fruits of total cultural ignorance, there are plenty of folks walking around with tattoos that say something VERY different than what they intended.
And thanks to a recent Reddit thread, all kinds of real life examples are right at our fingertips.
sunriseoverseas asked, "People who are able to read Chinese: what tattoos have you seen that were clearly not what the tattooed person aimed for?"
Spicier than Strong
"It's not me but my stepdad got a symbol on the back of his neck that he THOUGHT meant 'warrior' or 'strong' or something like that."
"Someone told him one day that it 100% says 'spicy.'"
-- BillyDomo
A Declaration
" 'As a matter of priority I declare, I am a wife beater' is what I saw on a man's arm."
"(作为优先事项,我声明我是殴打妻子的人)"
"he thinks it's means something along the lines of 'the best, strongest, manliest man is right here!' "
Making Them Sweat
"I'm Chinese and love to ask people why they have 'butthole' tattooed on themselves. I can't even read Chinese." -- choibot3000
"My friend would use 'Beef with Broccoli.' " -- davesnotonreddit
"I want you to know that you are my hero." -- windyporcupine
Courageous Milk
"I speak Japanese. A guy had a massive Kanji tattoo on his arm. I asked him, 'what did you ask them to put on you?' He said 'oh, this? It means courage.' "
"Sir, that means breastmilk."
Reverse Case
"Counterpoint: When I was living in China I saw a Chinese woman with 'Mind, Body, and Soup' tattooed on her. Still not quite sure if it was intentional or not" -- sometimesIbroncos
"I would not mind that tattoo." -- Lord_Grif
"At least I know what to call my organic soup subscription service now." -- jpterodactyl
Villainous Hole
"I read about one once that was supposed to read 'bad a**,' which it technically did, but the translation was closer to 'evil anus.' " -- SilentMunch
"I'd much rather have 'evil anus' on my arm than 'bad ass' " -- igotbigballs
"This would potentially be fairly accurate for me, at least on chili night" -- phormix
Can't Tell if This One Was Intentional or Not
"I saw a picture once of a huge back piece that just said 'vegetables.' " -- discountErasmus
"The last time I saw a thread like this, there was a guy who wanted to purposely get a tattoo that meant something ridiculous. I think he settled on 'bean curd.' " -- IAmGoingToF***That
So Everyone Knows Where He Stands
"Once on a subway this guy was telling us how his new tattoo was painful, it even had red marks around it."
"An Asian dude told him, 'Was it really worth it to get 'I eat pu**y' tattooed under your eye?'"
"The entire station filled with laughter"
-- JemaArteest
Constantly Campaigning
"there's this white guy i saw online a really long time ago — his wife/gf is called emily and he decided to get 'emily' but in chinese tattooed on him."
"he probably decided to run 'emily' thru google translate or smth bc he ended up tattooing the full name (first and last name) of a local politician in my city. it's still funny to me even now lol"
-- ptg1stwin
Loud and Proud
"I've spent some time in China and seen a lot of the reverse - Chinese folks wearing clothes with embarrassing things in English, or gibberish."
"The one I remember most clearly was a middle aged, no-nonsense looking kind of woman wearing a t-shirt that just said 'BALLS' in large sparkly letters."
Confirmed by Committee
"When I was in the Army, one of the guys I was in with had this tattoo that he was super proud of.He claimed it meant fierce. We went with it."
"A few months later, we're sent, as a group, to San Francisco as part of a recruiting, P/R trip. We go into Chinatown and a get dinner together. The guy with the tat always made sure that tat was visible."
"We're sitting at the table and the waitress takes our order, as she does she looks at dude and asks if he raises chickens?"
"Dude: 'What are taking about?' "
"Waitress: 'You have chicken on your arm.' "
"Dude: 'No, it says fierce' "
"Waitress in calls to another and says, 'What that say? Tell him.' "
"Second Waitress: 'Chicken' "
"You could just see dude die inside. Especially when a third person who's English wasn't as good says 'It say cock' "
-- gunbunnycb
Open to Interpretation
"I can't read any, but a friend in high school had to break the news to a girl her tattoo basically meant prostitute and not what she thought it meant." -- Waylon88
"She will have got her Chinese zodiac sign which is rooster. The one they commonly have in the tattoo shops is actually 'chicken' which is slang for prostitute." -- Sufficient_Bag_4551
Testing, Testing, Testing
"I can't read it but a girl i was seeing pointed out my ex girlfriend had a tattoo that read something like 'demo text' on her shoulder." -- suitology
"I've seen signs in various parts of Asia that are obviously from google translate. My favorite was, IIRC, at a park. -server temporarily down; please check back later" -- meowhahaha
Sounds Cozy
"Japanese kanji 'Friend Boat.' They thought it read 'friendship.' " -- tropicofducks
"I like friend boat better" -- Sphalerite
"F*** yea! Everybody in the friend boat!" -- kevingranade
A Warning Label
"I've never seen anything like this myself, but my favorite example I saw on a previous thread about this was someone who claimed their tattoo read 'lover of Asian beauty' when actually it said 'pervert pig' (変態豚)."
"I'm guessing he must have been one of those creeps who fetishizes and objectifies East Asian women, and the tattoo artist picked up on that and put a warning label on him."
-- KawadaShogo
Telling It Like It Is
"Heard about this guy who got a tattoo that was supposed to be words like honor, strength, etc."
"He showed it off to a friend that could read it. The friend laughed and said it actually read, 'In the end, this boy is ugly.' "
"He went back to the tattoo shop and it was permanently closed."
-- MikeCanDoIt
Artistic License
"One of my friends in HS got a Chinese symbol on her back , really huge. When I got to college I showed some Chinese / Mandarin speaking friends what it meant. My HS friend didn't even know what it meant to be honest."
"Turns out the symbol means absolutely nothing , like it's not a real symbol in any language , just randomly drawn swishes basically."
-- ivymel666
Lightning Round
"Ohohohoho, I have a lot to tell you...this chinese not-friend of mine were writing on people with permanent marker (not tattoo, but whatever)"
"面包 : Girl thought it meant 'Elegant Swan' . It means BREAD"
"土豆:Guy thought it meant 'Strong Warrior'. It means POTATO"
"傻子:Guy thought it meant 'Brave'. It means IDIOT"
"喝水: Girl thought it meant 'Beautiful Girl'. It means DRINK WATER"
"胖猪: Guy thought it meant 'Good Man' . It means FAT PIG"
"\|: Guy thought it meant 'Nice Guy' . THIS ISNT EVEN A WORD ITS NOT EVEN CHINESE, ITS JUST LINES"
"笨小孩: Girl thought it meant, 'Graceful Lady' It means DUMB CHILD"
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Sometimes you only need to experience something once, to know it's a never again situation.
I always say, try everything once.
Well, now that I'm older, a caveat to that is... try it all within reason.
How many things have we all walked away from saying the one time experience will suffice?
In fact, knowing when to say no is one of life's wisest choices.
Redditor Croakied wanted to discuss the times we've all said... "once was enough!" They asked:
"What is one thing that you will NEVER do again?"
Love. Did it. A few times. Moving on.
Stay Still
"Jump off a moving train."
DenseDriver6477
"My dad used to jump on a train when he was little to go to school. He broke his nose like twice doing it. He also would not recommend."
Darphon
“vaportini”
"Smoke alcohol. Me and my friends bought something called a 'vaportini' in college where you could pour alcohol into a bulb and after low heat separated the alcohol from the liquid, you could inhale it thru the glass straw you inserted into the bulb. Basically you got drunk directly into your bloodstream/brain and it never hit your stomach."
"If you did too much, your body wouldn’t make you vomit or something, there wouldn’t be a simple self regulation/safety measure. You’d just get alcohol poisoning. Felt very dangerous, the drunk wasn’t a regular drunk feeling. We used it once and were like okay, never again. I’d be surprised if you could still buy it, although it would be incredibly easy to replicate at home."
michelangelho
It’s heartbreaking...
"Fall in love with a drug addict."
Rains_Lee
"Good call, don’t do it. The drugs will always come first. Can’t go out unless their 'ok' with how much drugs they have and money left over if any, cant make love unless they have their fix for the night and even still it never feels normal, can’t trust them after the lies to get drugs and the manipulation they put you through, and you can’t change them no matter how much you try and wish they would. It’s heartbreaking."
Cvilla411
More me time...
"Give up my life for work. F**k going the extra mile for a place that doesn't value you and pays you crap even though you go the extra mile for them. You have 1 life with only so much precious time to enjoy it and slaving away at some job is not worth it. Do what you can to reduce your workload and find better employment, or hell try to change the working conditions at your current job to improve things for everyone if you can."
Mrhappytrigers
Well Obvi...
"Donate a kidney."
ToffieMonster
"Well, you could donate the remaining one. You just won’t be around to say anything about it."
shavemejesus
This is definitely list I can relate to. No thank you on a lot of this!
I Quit
"Smoke cigarettes, it's been two years since I quit."
SuvenPan
Forget It
"Climb mount Kilimanjaro. Toughest thing I've done and it's not worth it. I'm all about tough treks and camping but to put yourself under tough conditions and suspectable to altitude sickness only to get to the top for 10 minutes for a picture. No thank you."
Monks_
"I agree, it was memorable. Once was enough for my husband and I. Thankfully we stayed at American style hotel run by the US Navy with a hot tub and bar. Alcohol was definitely needed after all that."
Whatsherface112
I'm living alone!
"Sign a lease with a stranger without hanging out with them a few times beforehand. My past roommate experiences in college were terrible. Roommates either ignored me, hosted parties til 3 AM on weeknights, made the house the hangout and drug-den for them and their buddies. Meet up once and they'll put on an act for you. If you can, try to see how they act drunk or frustrated."
"Try to hang out with their buddies too so you can see the type of people who could be coming into your future place of residence. As soon as I can afford it, I'm living alone! Now, I investigate a potential roommate's social media and hang out at least twice before signing a lease with them."
fleursdefer
Stay Away
"Take back a cheater. Know your worth my brothers and sisters."
santichrist
"Ughhhhh going back and forth on this one. My boyfriend of 5 years has cheated on me. Several times, actually but says he’s really changed and is ready to settle down and wants me to move in with him. I’m on the fence. So they never change???"
madlecroy
Sleeptime
"Take a laxative and sleeping pill at the same time."
karmaredemption
Once, twice, three times... I'm out. Bye.
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People Imagine How They'd React If Their Significant Other Wanted To Sleep With Other People
There is an age old question that has been getting more traction surrounding sex for partners the last decade or so.
And that is... "is just one enough?"
Were we really meant to only be with one person forever?
There are so many flavors to taste.
What if your partner wants more cookie dough with your strawberry?
Redditor Pineapple-Status wanted to hear everyone's thoughts on opening the bedroom to others. They asked:
"What would you do if your long term SO suddenly wants to have sex with other people?"
I say I'd be ok with it, but I'm remembering my last relationship and I feel like I'm not a "put my $ where my mouth is type" on this issue.
Bye
"Wish her well and spend the next 2 years getting myself back to a place where I am ready to get hurt again."
wickedblight
It's Time to Roll On...
"Personally I would leave them."
"I think they're the ones leaving you. I don't think the relationship changes at that point; I think it ends. If you have a monogamous relationship, they are telling you they want to end that. They might be suggesting starting a new, non-monogamous relationship, but that is a separate thing. The original relationship is over."
octopoddle
ethical non-monogamy...
"OP, it's no different than anything else they want: you either agree and stay together, disagree but stay together, disagree and break up, or even agree and break up. What you're talking about is called 'ethical non-monogamy.'" The seminal book to read is called The Ethical Sl*t."
"It basically boils down to be whatever you want, just don't lie about it. The tricky thing is that this is something that was not present before, but is present now. So it's a potential fork in your road. If you're against it, it's up to your SO to decide if sex with other people is more important to them than a life with you."
Tokugawa
a different story...
"I think it depends too how intently they're interested. If it's a thing they bring up because they're curious but it's not a dealbreaker for them, I'm fine with that even if I don't want to proceed. A solid relationship involves open communication, and it'd make me happy if my partner trusted us and our bond enough to voice that curiosity with me."
"If it's something their heart's absolutely set on, then it's a different story. Either way, it's kind of strange to me how these posts always assume simply asking your partner how they feel about opening the relationship means they're now wholey invested in the poly lifestyle and they'll resent you or cheat if you say no."
donkeynique
Others
"Happy that we have common interest, sad that it's different 'other people."
i_lick_icicles
Sex is always an issue. Remember when it was just fun?
Mine
"Leave her. I’m far too possessive and jealous to be able to mentally accept polyamory. If she has a desire to be with other people I’m not going to stand in her way but I’m not going to be there when she gets home either."
Thiek
Not Me...
"Break up. My parents were poly and it's just not for me. I've been honest with every relationship I've been in that I'm not interested in any type of open relationship. If they want to be with someone else that's fine but we'll be over. My husband is aware of this and on board (and has been for over twenty years!). So if he came to me with this yes I would be heartbroken but I'm not willing to budge on this and it would be the end of our relationship."
GoldDustWitchQueen
Let's Talk
"Counseling time! We're married. I'm chronically ill (stage 4 breast cancer) and have no libido. We try to make intimacy work, and obviously in that case it wouldn't be working. So. Time for a pro to sort out the marriage, and possibly a sex therapist for me."
insertcaffeine
Awkward Positions
"I’ll put myself hypothetically in this position. My partner and I only want each other. We’ve made this abundantly clear to each other. However, if she came to me with desire to open our bedroom and she wanted to sleep with people outside our marriage."
"I would simply express how I vehemently do not an open bedroom and that it would kill any desire I have to want her, be with her, love her, etc. Our couple dynamic has been working well through our ups and downs. Involving some stranger in the ONE thing I find most sacred with my partner is the best way for me to lose any interest or passion for the relationship."
RedFlaim
Farewell
"Break it off, because they definitely already have someone in mind and you telling them no won't change the fact that they were only one step away from following through with it."
Caressticles
Well it feels like a lot of people still believe in one partner, happily ever after. Good for y'all. But big props to these couples who have open and honest conversations about their wants and needs.
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Many of us sometimes fantasize about what we would do to our worst enemies, especially in the moments when they're actively making our lives worse.
While most of us would never actually do any of the things that we contemplate instead of screaming at that super annoying person at the office, we do get pretty creative with the ideas.
Redditor take_me_there_ asked:
"What WOULD you wish on your worst enemy?"
This One Would Hurt
"A conscience. Let her realize the horrific things she’s done."
- Jenny010137
"Seriously. Introspection, self awareness, and empathy are traits that would improve a lot of sh*tty people."
- el_muerte17
"Oh I wish I had thought of this one. If my enemy had a conscience, wow life would be much different."
- Shelbysouth43
No Pearly Whites For You
"I’d like all their teeth to turn really yellow and stay yellow no matter what they do."
- toothfixingfiend
"What did I ever do to you?"
- Spideredd
"I don't even know you! Give me back my enamel!"
- AngryMustache9
Everything You Own Is Orange Now
"Permanent Cheeto fingers. Just orange cheese dust getting on everything."
- cocoapuff1721
"This has to be one of the most evil things I ever heard, yet absolutely hilarious."
-Merk0411
"The Midas Touch: Snack Edition"
- MaryVenetia
Ouch, But Forever
"Stubbing and breaking their toe and right as it’s about to be done healing it happens again over and over for the rest of their pitiful time on this hell we call earth."
- No-Bee-2971
"Sisyphoot"
- Alpha_6
"More of a Toemetheus imo"
- PykeTheDrowned
Self Reflection
"For them to realize how big of an a-hole they are."
- mayhemanaged
"Same for me. The trouble is mine probably knows what a tremendous a-hole he is, and just doesn't care (it's what defines him, is his outlook more than likely), so, give mine a conscience as well, he undeniably lacks one."
- RhoadsOfRock
"a crushing moment of self realization is something that can destroy you mentally. I wish that on them."
- chancetodream
Bury Them Under A Mountain Of Minor Inconveniences
"Always being hungry two hours after eating no matter how large the meal. Slow internet. Traffic jams no matter the location. Self doubt. Allergies. Favorite shows spoiled."
"Nothing major enough to be life altering but constant, low grade inconveniences that wear on your soul every day."
- I_Love_Small_Br**sts
"Every bite of food they eat/drink they drink being slightly the wrong temperature."
"Coffee? Warm but not hot. Cola? Cool, but not cold. Muffin? Ever so slightly frozen."
"Not enough to ruin their life, but just enough to not quite have full enjoyment of anything.."
- HappiHappiHappi
They'll Never Be Able To Use Their Computer Again
"Quick scan with McAfee on their computer."
- halflife_3
"You f**king monster."
- Orion_2kTC
"The constant pop-ups from McAfee is too far."
- _Land_Rover_Series_3
That's A New Level Of Evil
"Bed bugs."
- thrawn1825
"Currently dealing with bed bugs, and I can absolutely confirm this is the kind of thing I would wish upon my worst enemy. It is miserable and painful, and I've tried everything to get rid of them at this point."
"I would easily wish this upon my worst enemy, x10."
- ArbitrarilyStagnant
"Oh hell no, you went there... Hopefully they aren't living in an apartment complex or you've cursed everyone in the building."
- expect_less
Well of course I know him. He’s me.
"$100,000. I sure could use it."
- Sparklesperson
"'It’s no surprise to me I am my own worst enemy'"
- FishyVonFishenHymer
"Lol I thought this was that deep sh*t like 'pray for those you resent to have all the things you want in life….' Then I realized."
- No-Chipmunk9527
Forever Constipated
"That they can never have a satisfying poop. They always feel like they have to go to the bathroom and when they do nothing comes."
- [User Deleted]
"Wow. That's evil. Always feeling the need to pee would be good (as in horrific) too."
- ipakookapi
We definitely don't recommend implementing any of these plans (not that most would actually be possible), but here's some new ideas for the next time you're stuck in a meeting with your most annoying coworker and need a little fantastical escape.
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I grew up poor, and I remember the little things that made me smile when we just happened to have enough that week.
The little things that a truly rich person would not think twice about.
Ah, the luxury of it.
What spells luxury for you?
Redditor ConAir161057 wanted to compare notes about the things in life that feel like items only money can buy. They asked:
"For people who grew up with little money, what always felt like a luxury?"
New clothes. I had so many hand me downs and thrift store clothes... new seemed like a dream.
Anxiety
"After growing up in a home where every unexpected problem was a financial emergency, my idea of wealthy became 'I just want enough money that if something breaks I don't get anxiety about how to deal with it.'"
Obiwan_ca_bl**me
Literature
"Getting to buy something from the scholastic book fair."
Rich*itch3232
"My school, at the end of it a bunch of books were 'donated' and then spread out on a table in the library. We all got to go pick one book. So even if kids didn’t get to purchase a book, in the end they had a chance to still get a book. It’s actually how I got my first Harry Potter book. Was a cool idea for any school staff or parents active in their kids’ schools."
glass_pillow
Christmas
"Getting new clothes at Christmas from relatives. I don't know if that is exactly a luxury or the kind of answer you are looking for, but we never had a lot of money when I was in middle school. I went an entire year wearing the same pants everyday. The funny thing was my parents didn't even buy them for me."
"I got them for Christmas from my Grandparents. All the kids use to give me so much sh*t for wearing the same pants everyday. I always told them that I had 5 of the same pair which made me feel good inside and kind of made them ease off even though I know they didn't believe me."
"I remember I fell on the school bus one day and the jagged floor cut a hole right in the knee cap and the panic that went over me was just insane. It was one of the worst feelings of my whole life because I knew that I didn't have any other pants to wear and that now all of the kids in my school were going to know that I only had 1 pair. Needless to say I could not wait for the last month of school to end."
themagicman_1231
I'm Away
"Summer camp, or basically any school trips that had to be paid for. At my school the kids who couldn't afford to go on trips that happened during school hours still had to come to the school, we just sat in a room and did extra work like it was detention."
Helpful_Yams
"I was lucky. If you taught at the day camp your kid could go for free. That was just day camp though not sleepaway camp. My mom found a camp teacher who had no kids of his own and he signed me up as his kid so I could get free day camp. Did that all through elementary school."
randtcouple
Big Deals
"Going out for pizza was a big deal. Those free mini pizzas for reading books were huge."
Shroom4Yoshi
Food is always an issue when you're broke.
Damage
"Being able to turn on the heat in the cold and pay a professional to fix damaged appliances, plumbing, and other issues."
Liggettef
Spoiled
"When my grandma would come pick me up and spoil me. My parents didn't have much money and were addicts so when my grandma would come get me I would come back with new clothes, video games, toys, etc. I used to think my grandma was rich but she actually just had a stable income."
nawlepen
"I was in this position when I was younger. I always thought my grandma had SO much money… but all she did was go to work everyday. Always made sure I had clothes and all my school supplies. I miss her pretty bad."
Keywork29
Water
"I am from a small island in the Pacific. While I mostly still take cold showers, I have always felt that a hot shower is the finest luxury one can experience. I had my first hot shower when I was 22 years old and I can never forget it."
FSMPIO
"This is the kind of luxury I think people take for granted, I always avoided showers in the winter as a kid since most of the time they where cold showers and the temperature here was around 12c° during those times."
PowerfullDio
Showerware
"Towels. Honestly, I was almost 10 When I realized people didn’t just put back on their dirty clothes after a shower because my family was so large (12 kids total including myself) and extremely poor. I thought towels were just for hotels or were maybe a prop on television. I went to a friends house and she asked for my help folding her towels. I remember laughing and thinking she must be rich."
"Long story short, I wasn’t sure which way to fold the towels, and begged my mom to buy them after I revealed that my friend, Simone, had them. She bought a box of used ones from a local auction and I walked around with them on my head feeling like a frigging empress after that, even though—-let’s be clear… these were second hand towels!"
shakezula1025
Or BK...
"Grew up poor and when I was a kid I used to think you were rich if you had a dishwasher and a millionaire if you had one of those refrigerators that have a button for ice. McDonalds was also a luxury, a couple times a year on our birthdays."
chinderellab*tch
Everyone should have access to all of these things. Why is life unfair?
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