Attractive People Explain What The Downsides Are To Their Good Looks
Being attractive is a universal desire for most people. However, just like how every cloud has a silver lining, every blessing has a disadvantage. What are the downsides to being hot? These Redditors will reveal the truth to being attractive.
u/automaticsage asked: Good looking people of Reddit, what are some actual disadvantages you face because of your looks?
Social moth.
Arrogance. Everybody thinks you're an arrogant f**k when you don't talk or make contact at a social gathering. It's simply because I want to chill and be reserved. Nothing to do with arrogance.
I'd say I'm a social butterfly but I'm really just a social moth.
Often not related.
They assume I have a large penis too, they are often disappointed.
The Halo effect describes the phenomenon that when people notice positive attributes in one specific field they also assume them to exist in other fields. It's a cognitive bias.
Not the worst assumption.
People assume I'm gay when I'm with male friends.
People assumed I'm gay because I'm quiet lmao. But it was only a problem when I was in the US
The struggle.
Huge pressure to find a partner. I've been called cute by girls and women for years now, because of my colour and eye combination but I've never had a girlfriend. When people jokingly ask me how many girlfriends I've had, or how many hearts I've broken, I feel an insane amount of pressure because I've never had a girlfriend and I don't currently have one.
And if you're wondering, I've got green-blue eyes with a Mediterranean colouring.
Wooooow.
People seem to assume I'm (F) stupid or naive and need help. My favorite was when a cable guy drew a map of how he would run a cord from the 1st floor to the 2nd of my townhome. He even mimicked using a drill while making drill sounds with his mouth.
I have a PhD in mechanical engineering.
This got real.
People project a lot of their feelings onto you, they make a lot of assumptions.
If the haze wears off and I don't meet their made up standards for me, they get mad like I betrayed them.
To add to this, for me it becomes more of a problem with close friends. When we're at a bar on a Friday night and I'm sitting with my buddy who really likes this one girl in the bar and she comes to talk and its evident she's more into me than him.
I'm not really trying and I am barely interested in you an my friend here is cool, smart, funny and likes you can you please stop looking at my face and throw him a bone?
Who doesn't love Cheetos though?
As a guy, apparently I look a little too intimidating, if that makes sense. Like I look like the person who has their life figured out and doesn't take crap from people. In reality, I'm a socially awkward guy who loves nerdy facts and Cheetos.
I've been told my husband looks intimidating. And they think I look so sweet because I am usually smiling.
Funny thing is: he's a sweet ol' teddy bear. I'm the b*tch.
Reddit Users Share Their Best 'It's A Small World After All' Experience
Dating is tough enough.
In dating life, people really expect a lot more from you when you're good lookin'.
They go off on your looks, and create an image in their heads of what you'd be like, before actually meeting you.
I hate it. I hate it. I f**king hate it! I struggle with self doubt so it hurts when I can't live up to some impossible image that they created of me in their heads. What are your options? Act inauthentically or watch them slowly lose interest? How do you even communicate this kind of discomfort?
I avoid dating.
Extrovert problems.
Any friendly conversation I have with a guy or just smiling (I am an extroverted person) is automatically considered flirting. The unrealistic expectations and assumption that I can easily find a relationship.
Guys, good guys especially, are intimidated by my looks too easily and just give up either because of insecurity or because they think I am high maintenance. Ugh!!!!
A surprising difficulty with women.
Until I met my wife I always had difficulty with women. Mainly back in high school, the girls that did want to go out with me were shallow and just wanted the status of having me as their boyfriend. Those were really bad relationships that never lasted long.
And then there were the girls I actually liked who weren't extremely popular and had trouble believing I had genuine interest in them. I admit that it didn't help that I had had a number of short relationships with the 'it' girls in school which gave the appearance to some that I was a player but that wasn't me on the inside.
It took moving cities before I finally managed to meet women who didn't have pre-conceived notions about me and would give me a chance based on merit rather than reputation. Even now, at 36 years of age, we get women who glare at my wife and I as we walk along holding hands or try to flirt with me in front of her. It is fun to shut them down by telling them about the kind of woman I like while simultaneously putting my arm around my wife though.
Babyface.
That I am a kid. Like I am in high school and I have a huge babyface. I look like I'm 11. It now looks stupid since I am growing a beard.
Ugh, mansplaining.
I'm not amazing looking but I (F) have a certain quality about me. Not bad looking, cute, a bit of a goofy personality and physically quite clumsy, and oh so approachable and non threatening. Think Anne Hathaway playing a character in a film in the noughties.
I get a lot of unsolicited advice from men and find it hard to do anything in public without some arrogant b*stard sliding up and forcing a sh*tty laugh and explaining the correct way to do it. In my old job a guy even tried to show me how to mop a floor and I'm surprised there wasn't smoke coming from my ears.
That's annoying.
I get treated like my self esteem issues don't count because of my appearance. I had terrible self esteem throughout the majority of my teens which I've worked really hard to try and overcome, but I still feel uncomfortable even posting in this thread because of them. Thanks to a mixture of genetics and how I've been exercising regularly since I was like 8 years old (now 22), I'm both curvy and visibly fit (aside from cardio but I'm working on that) and as I've gotten older I've become more aware if the effect I can have on people, but when I try to express my insecurities I basically always get some sort of response along the lines of how I'm so pretty and so many people would kill to look how I do and I have the perfect body. Funnily enough, it never makes me feel better.
ETA: Thought of another one. People I'm friends with will just... tell me they had a crush on me/want to sleep with me fairly regularly, then just leave me with that information to deal with. I'm bi so I also get a double dose of it, and tbh it is kinda affecting how I act around friends, because I'm always a little on edge and hyperaware that they may only be friends with me because they want to hook up with me. I have had people straight up just stop talking to me as soon as they get into relationships, and it's always so hurtful when that happens because it seriously just feels like they were my friend because they wanted to f*ck me, and as soon as that stopped being an option I was dropped.
Jealousy is a disease.
I'm female. I "blossomed" when I was 19 and it was very difficult for me to deal with. It became impossible to make female friends during college for one. Women HATED me. They wouldn't want me around, wouldn't talk to me, would be extremely mean-spirited, make a point of excluding me socially, and I truly had no idea what was going on because I grew up awkward and never thought of myself as looking like anyone but...me. But overnight, my looks were getting a LOT of attention. It was very confusing and at times, extremely painful and hard for me to navigate. People were constantly commenting on my looks which made me embarrassed.
Sometimes women will want to be friends with me as a way to deal with their own insecurity issues to try to make themselves feel better (by putting me down and cutting me apart once we're "friends"). Or, people will feel better about themselves if they can be convinced you're stupid, so they'll try to make you out to be an idiot. Also, it generally seems to make people feel intimidated no matter how nice you are so they end up being cold / rude / generally weird toward you. Also, people will make your looks a topic of conversation which can be very embarrassing. Or say things like "you're so pretty, it's too bad you wear your hair this way...you don't dress up more..." etc.
I'm older now, and I get less attention than I used to, and for that, I'm grateful. My looks are nothing like they used to be and it's a relief. My husband says he sees people checking me out all the time, but I think either he's sweetly flattering me or I've just learned to ignore the looks. I really don't think I look that special (and I have my own insecurities as well), but people tell me all the time that I'm beautiful. It's nice sometimes, but I honestly wish I just had a pleasant, regularly attractive face that didn't get any sort of extra attention. For the few times I've enjoyed it, it's honestly been more of a distraction and prevented people from getting to really know me. That's the hardest part for me. The distance it causes people to keep from me.
Unless you're in the entertainment industry or modeling and making money from your looks (I tried that route and hated the whole thing), for me personally, it's been pretty much just a hassle.
This is infuriating.
I get sexually harassed every single day I leave my house. It's contributed to me having agoraphobia bouts and causes me a lot of stress and anxiety. I've tried dressing differently, not wearing makeup, not doing my hair but it doesn't matter. I feel wound up and on edge when I just want to be able to walk down the street without being yelled at or followed or even touched by strangers.
It's highly believed that it is important to learn history as a means to improve our future.
What is often overlooked is that what is taught in history class is going to be very different depending on where you went to school.
And this isn't just internationally, even different regions of the United states will likely have very different lessons on American history.
This frequently results in our learning fascinating, heartbreaking and horrifying historical facts which our middle or high school history teachers neglected to teach us.
Redditor Acherontia_atropos91 was curious to learn things people either wished they had learned, or believe they should have learned, in their school history class, leading them to ask:
What isn’t taught in history class but should be?
The Irish Troubles
"The troubles."
"Too many people in America do not understand why a wall straight through Ireland would be a BAD idea."
"I’m referring to the Brexit referendum and possible outcomes."
"If people were wondering why we were talking about walls through Ireland in the first place."- CLCVS.
Forgotten elements of World War II
"What the Japanese did to the Chinese during WW2."
"Unit 731."- CaptainMcBoogerJew.
"Japan gets off easy for their war crimes in WW2."
"They killed an estimated 16mil Chinese civilians and another 8mil soldiers"
"Also, Pol Pot."
"Didn't know who he was until I was like 25."
"Worst dictator all time (in terms of percentage of population he decimated)".
The truth about the American Revolution
"That the American Revolution was part of a wider cold war type of conflict with France."
"The American Revolution was basically the UK's equivalent of the US version of Vietnam."- vinsant7.
The Dark side of Swedish history.
"As a Swede, I'd like to know more of all the horrible sh*t my country has done throughout history."
"It's a damn shame we're trying to hide our history."
"For example, Swedes killed a metric sh*t ton of all Polish people when we were at our strongest."
"That's the kinda sh*t we don't get to learn."- mogwandayy.
Colonization
"Basically what Belgium did to the Congo."
"A lot of people are telling me that they are taught about this actually."
"I'm glad to hear it because I wasn't taught about this in the USA during my public school days (1995-2008)."- EconArch.
The truth about "heroes".
"While teaching about historical Heroes they should also tell students about the unspeakable things some of them did."
"Many famous figures throughout history who are pillars of morality actually did many terrible things." - User Deleted
Intolerance for Mental Illness
"The dark history of mental illness treatments."
"I think it's worth learning about."- 7dayexcerpt.
Slavic Mythology
"Slavic mythology in Slavic countries."
"Don't get me wrong, I love both Greek & Roman mythology and as a person from the Balkans both of those cultures are part of my country's history and had great influence over not only my region but the entirety of the continent & the western world but I wouldn't mind knowing more about Slavic mythology as well."- ShorsShezzarine.
The truth about the CIA
"How the CIA was made and all the shady things they did over the years."- ALargeChip.
There is a lot about the history of our world, not to mention our own country which shouldn't be ignored.
And it's from learning from our mistakes that we really improve our future.
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So apparently we are in the endemic phase of this nonsense.
We have light at the end of the tunnel.
So what now?
Where do we go from here?
Normal seems like an outdated word.
How do we get back to normal though?
Is it even possible?
What are reaching back to?
Life pre-Covid.
Those were the days.
If only we could bring them back.
Redditor hetravelingsong wanted to discuss our new normal in this hopeful "endemic" phase. So they asked:
"What’s something random you miss about pre-COVID times?"
I miss people being sane. Though that maybe election cycle issues not COVID. We'll never know.
I thought I was Alone...
"Being able to grocery shop after 11 pm."
Reading_Rainboner
"Hell yes. I miss the days where the Walmart across the street was open 24 hours."
Small_Tax_9432
let's just go...
"I miss spontaneity... everything now seems to have a barrier of difficulty."
iidosee
"I live very close to Disneyland so I have an annual pass. My friends and I would just go there after work and hang out and grab a bite to eat."
"Now, we have to reserve a day to go. And most of the time, the days are at 'full' capacity so we couldn't even reserve. I don't want to schedule to hang out at Disneyland for a couple hours for July. So yeah, I definitely miss the 'lets go eat at Disneyland tonight?' texts."
mymymissmai
Not til 24-25
"Functioning global supply chains. Ah, the product you want has got microchips in it? 9 month wait."
richard-king
"Minimum, I'd been saying for a while now that I wouldn't expect a true return to normalcy in terms of electronics prices till 2024-2025. Although Crypto crashing through the floor really took some of the pressure off graphics cards which I really appreciate."
statiiic
WTF?!?!
"How affordable everything was!"
Disastrous_Hour_6776
"Yep. Today I was bagging up my things at the grocery store and I heard the cashier say to the lady behind me 'thats $78.12.' She had -- 2 boxes of Kellogg's corn flakes, a carton of 12 eggs, milk, strawberries, raspberries, blue berries, a small cheese cake, English muffins, coffee, and a small whole frozen chicken that could maybe feed 3 people if the meat portioning was small."
SnowyInuk
Sushi
"My favorite sushi place. It was good quality, close by, kid-friendly, and not too expensive."
InannasPocket
All of this... it was a simpler time.
NASTY
"As a retail worker, just how f**king NASTY some people have gotten."
DmitriPetrov*itch
"They applauded you for being an essential worker but won’t vote for policies that’ll raise minimum wage while insisting a wage cap for heavily paid employees."
sketchysketchist
CHANGES your DNA...
"Some of the people closest to me became very bitter and petty over the last 2 years. So many people have the 'crazy eyes' now."
__--__7
"So true and holidays with the family is like who has the biggest tinfoil hat building contest. How many jumps does your brain have to go through to think that the Covid vaccine CHANGES your DNA into the patented DNA so that the government now controls your body."
"So like vaccinated people now have a singular DNA set. I feel like I still have a chunk of my brain just broken off due to that comment alone. I was also told by same family member that I could never donate blood again due to the vaccine. I guess it is so my patented DNA doesn't affect people?? FYI my vaccinated butt just donated today fine and multiple other times after the vaccine."
tyreka13
Homeward Bound
"House prices."
adrianinked
"I'm resigned to never thinking I have a chance on owning property where I live. I'm 30 and just can't imagine it anymore. And I don't want to live anywhere else so, whatever."
Osdab2daf
"That didn’t happen because of the pandemic. That was already happening regardless."
CH11DW
Oh Mickey
"All Day Breakfast at McDonalds."
hutch2522
"It was honestly hell to do, and not very popular. ITs margins aren't anywhere dinner and lunch specials. ON top of that, the temperatures are such that They require its own grill, meaning that if you have 2 grills in shop, you are down 50% of lunch capacity."
Freyas_Follower
Way back when...
"Hanging out with friends. And I mean waaaaaay before Covid. Like 2006 back when I had some friends."
LoocsinatasYT
I miss the old days. Maybe we'll get back there.
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What do you believe?
Is there a GOD in the sky?
Is he guiding us and helping us?
Life is really hard. Why is that is a big entity is up there loving us?
Atheists have taken a lot of heat for what feels like shunning GOD.
What if they've been right all along?
Maybe let's take a listen and see what they really think.
Redditor __Jacob______ wanted to hear from the people who don't really believe all that "God" stuff. They asked:
"Atheists, what do you believe in?"
I'm waffling between G-O-D and nothing. So please give me some education.
911
"We need to look out for each other because help isn't coming."
cknipe
Peace Out
"More than 2 decades ago, a priest was giving a sermon in my church and he said 'our faith requires you to believe without question. Why call it faith if you have to ask questions?' I haven't returned to church. Not until my wedding day but you know what I mean."
asiangontear
Delusion
"When I was young I used to think that after death you would have access to a PC that you could see absolutely anything about your life. Stats, any question you had no matter how obscure, replays of moments, perspectives of others in relation to you. No matter what you wanted to know, if it was relatable to you, you could see it. I know it's silly, but as time goes on I just want it to be real, and I don't think I'd have any issue allowing myself to fall into that delusion."
eggwardpenisglands
I think nothing happens...
"Realistically, I think nothing happens. We literally experience nothing after death. Same thing that we experience before birth. We don't exist, so it's nothing. I think the tenant that we should follow while living is to try to be happy and healthy while minimizing the damage we do to each other."
"What I would LIKE to happen after death is whatever you believe in, exists. I think Christians should get to go to heaven if they truly believe in it, Hindus and Buddhists get reincarnated, and everyone else also gets to experience what they believe they will experience."
"'I would still experience Nothing. Maybe it's one of those things where at the moment of death their brain makes them experience what feels like an infinitely long moment in time where they experience their afterlife. I just think it would be neat for everybody."
Better_Meat_
Shrug
"Best advice I received from a dear senior on their way out. 'You win some, you lose some' shrug. Nothing divine, life is that simple and wonderful, accept it and move on."
Tune_Kindly
It all sounds pretty simple. Why are people so up in arms about Atheists?
Whatever
"I believe in a universe that doesn't care, and people that do."
imCIK
Cool with Empty
"Nothing. [Serious]."
rumblingtummy29
"I feel this way about death. When I was 5, my grandfather died and my cousin simple said, he is dead, that means you are gone forever. Everything ends up dying, even plants and animals. I'm now in my 40's and still have this simplistic view of life and death. People think I'm ambivalent to life and death but it's just what it is."
thepigfish82
puppet-masters...
"I think a lot of religious people struggle with the fact that we are all just swirling units of chaos. There is no grand plan or great orchestrator. I think that’s why people who are prone to religion are also susceptible to things like Q anon and the Cabal and all that. They REALLY want to believe that there is some almighty puppet-master who determines all of humanity’s fate."
Lngtmelrker
“we’re living in a society!”
"Just be a kind and empathetic person not because you’re worried about some cosmic justice, but because it’s the right thing to do. If there is some being that created us there’s no way they actually care about believing in it or adhering to some rules from over 2000 years ago."
"Also a big thing for me is that I find the idea that you need religion or the Bible in order to have morals and ethics pretty dumb. It’s pretty f**king clear that most evangelicals have neither. But my main thing is being a good person simply because, as George Costanza once said we’re living in a society!' If you’re only a good person in order to make it to heaven you probably aren’t actually a good and moral person."
conservative_genius
That's All
"You're born. You live. You die. That's it. After you die you cease to exist, the same as before you were born."
serefina
Believe what you want. We're all here together. So let's focus there.
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The list of what irritates me is endless.
I mean... breathing too loud or dust can set me off.
I'm a bit unstable, yes.
But I'm not alone.
So let's discuss.
Redditor Aburntbagel6 wanted to hear about all the times many of us just couldn't control our disdain. They asked:
"What never fails to piss you off?"
I feel like this article can go on forever. Let's get some highlights.
Wasted Time
"Meetings that could and should have been an email."
Sirena609
Lotto People
"Getting stuck behind people playing the lottery at a corner store."
thenuggetlover
"I also used to work in a gas station and you’re SO right. I f**king hated the lottery people. Especially since my store had a small staff and there was usually only one of us working at a time, which meant that I couldn’t get any of my other work done as long as they were there."
"And you’re right, it’s also pretty sad to watch. I had one lady who used to come in every day and spent hundreds and HUNDREDS of dollars on scratch tickets. One day, she won $200 after spending probably around $600 and she was so excited and saying she can 'finally pay her bills.'"
i-am-your-god-now
Aware...
"No situational awareness. Job, home, shopping, driving. Think for one minute and go about. OBSERVE!!"
Dizzy-Foundation8122
"My mom is one of those people who leave the shopping cart in the middle of the damn aisle and proceed to walk twenty feet away. After correcting her a million times to no effect I just walk away now so people don’t know I’m with her."
OutrageousEvent
Shut Up!
"Endless barking in the middle of the night, I love animals but that sh*t I can't stand."
Acceptable-Lemon2924
"Endless barking in general drives me up a wall. One of my friends dogs was barking almost an entire gaming session the other day. I wanted to reach through the computer and smack him for letting it go on."
bangersnmash13
Kindness
"People being mean to service workers, especially if the workers are very young."'
scaryboilednoodles
All of these things. I hate them all.
Admit It
"People who never accept fault when they mess something up. Like, why blame a million people when it was clearly you who did it???"
Quirky-Area-8978
From Above
"My upstairs neighbors."
lutzow89
"I had terrible neighbors at my previous apartment. It was a one person studio for students, but her boyfriend was clearly living with her illegally and he was loud."
"One night we knocked n the door at 3 AM because of the loud music and an unknown girl opened the door. I just thought they were having a little party. But the next door I saw the girl living there come home with a suitcase after having been away for the weekend... Her BF was cheating on her in her own apartment."
Th3_Accountant
Move Away
"People who sit directly next to me at the airport, movie theater, any other place where you can choose a seat when there is PLENTY of other seating."
BacardiPardy33
"I can’t YES this enough and the ones who can’t park for crap so they park so close you can’t open doors on one side of the car or the ones who park directly behind when you pulled through so the door won’t open to load groceries."
BacardiPardy33
It's Over
"People who try to restart old drama. Like I'm done with you, just leave me alone."
Tired_Potatos
"Yep, half the reason I've basically quit playing one of my favorite online video games. People keep bringing old crap up or sh*tting on on someone who used to be our friend. I got tired of it so I just ejected the game out of me."
CaucasianHumus
AHHHHH!!!
"People walking too slow in front of me with no way to get around them. It’s even worse if it’s a couple or group taking up the whole sidewalk. HAVE SOME SPATIAL AWARENESS FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!!"
_-v0x-_
Life in general pisses me off. I'm easy.
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