"This is a maaaaaan's world!" **in my very best James Brown voice**
But that doesn't necessarily mean they're all out here having the time of their life. Reddit user "Kyoto_j" asked:
"Guys of reddit, whats one thing you hate about being a dude?"
So we're about to be very honest here and admit that I don't know what I was expecting, but it wasn't this. Yeah, we're about to talk about penises (a lot) but there's a lot more going on than just "locker room" jokes.
We'll totally start there, though...
Problematic Peeing
peeing feels so good GIFGiphy"Split stream when I pee." - Bantabury97
"A few mornings back I finally did it, guys. The legendary triple stream is real. Rejoice." - theyfoundmeomg
"And the little dribble at the end I can't begin to count how many times I thought I was safe and then had to wash my pants" - FlowerGlock
Traumatic Erections
Awkward Ed Helms GIF by The OfficeGiphy"When I was in middle school having to deal with spontaneous erections was so embarrassing to the point of being traumatic."
"Girls have periods, and we can never compete with that level of inconvenience, but these members of ours ain't a walk in the park." - lastusernameiswearr
"I'm 34 and it still happens from time to time. Mostly when I'm tired and bored, which usually happens at meetings and courses for work, similar environments to a schoolroom. Going to the bathroom to crank one out, and chugging down some caffeine usually helps." - Hawk_Thor
Sensitive
Tobey Maguire Reaction GIFGiphy"I'm very, very emotionally sensitive and people laugh at me for it."
"Just the other day I made a post in a Facebook group reviewing a restaurant I had a great experience in, and all these strange men and women made fun of me. I wish I could blow it off but it hurt my feelings so bad, and I can't just move on and shake it off."
"I wanted to either write every mean person who wrote, and tell them how much they hurt my feelings, or hurt them myself. I still even get caught up thinking for hours sometimes about my bullies in primary school. I'm 31."
"Men can't talk to anyone." - Yusi-D-Jordan
Bad Intentions
Rainn Wilson Running GIF by CootiesGiphy"I'm always worried if people think I'm being a creep or a perv or something. A lot of messed up sh*t happens in the world and I don't blame anyone, but I hate being self-conscious about it." - Hidden_Squid14
"Yep, I would never dream of harming a kid and I keep friendly around them, but I fear that people will think ill of my intentions when I'm just being nice to the kid who decided to say hi to me" - Furydragonstormer
"When my kids were little I had the cops called on me (twice) for being at a playground with my kids during the day."
"They said the women thought I had kidnapped them or something like that. My sons look a lot like me (poor boys)." - Reloaded9mm
"Yes, this is a big one for me. I pretty much always ignore kids unless I'm forced to acknowledge their presence."
"When I was younger, there was a friend of mine who had an adorable daughter who was 3 or 4 and for some insane reason she loved me to pieces. I didn't do anything to deserve her affection, but she almost always came over to me and just smiled and hung around me."
"I wasn't very comfortable around kids, and I'm still not, but after a while I started to get used to her and actually liked playing with her and talking to her. It was entirely innocent, and not anything I sought out. But it turns out her family thought she hung around me all the time because I did something inappropriate to her, or something."
"I think they were mostly just questioning my motives for playing with her and talking to her."
"They once asked me if I gave her candy and whenever she came over to me someone would stand there awkwardly, watching me out of the corner of their eye. In a way I don't blame them. I'm a pretty big guy, and it might be hard to believe I would never hurt anything or anyone."
"But finding out that people thought I was creepy because an adorable little girl wanted to be my friend, which I honestly had no control over was a major hit to my self esteem." - Im_Just_Cake
Fatherhood Is Fabulous
Fathers Day Dad GIF by America's Funniest Home VideosGiphy"I'm a stay at home dad. I don't know how to put it simply, or what the right term is, but I have been semi-frequently harassed, berated, and otherwise made to look foolish or feel ashamed because I'm a man who loves his babies."
"Out at the park with my son? 'Poor guy has to be with his kids while the missus is at home. She must have him whipped.' "
"At the grocery store with the baby? 'Oh you're so sweet doing this for your wife.' "
"At the doctor doing checkups/shots? I'll have to deal with random people saying I either don't know what I'm talking about, that I just think my son is special, that I cant be trusted to give info on their health because I'm not their mom, and that I 'need to tell my wife...' "
"Those aren't bad, it's just obnoxious."
"The part that really sucks is that my friends make fun of me for it, or when an argument happen they throw it in my face that I don't have a job and therefore am not a real man."
"Just the status quo that a man must work to death and a woman is the only one fit to stay home grinds my gears."
"I know how to change a diaper. Yes, I'm happy. Yes, it was MY choice to stay home."
"No, I don't mind not getting to f*ck off with my friends all the time. Yes, I know how to deal with children's medical issues."
"And no, I wouldn't trade it for the world." - D3athraxys
Size Matters
twin peaks head shake GIF by Twin Peaks on ShowtimeGiphy"I'm 6'3" and I have a problem with feeling imposing even though I'm just trying to exist."
"I'm very awkward because of it, because I not only watch every word that comes out of my mouth, but I'm also very aware of how tall I am & that some people, usually women, might be more guarded towards me if they don't know me."
"The biggest issue is where I work."
"I work in retail and there's a lot of underage 17 year old kids working there. I usually don't talk with them for too long because I'm afraid I'll seem creepy to them, or to people who might be pricking up their ears to make sure I'm not trying to make a move on them or something like that."
"And I hope I don't come across like my problems are bigger than other people's. But these are definitely problems I face on a day to day basis." - Im_Just_A_Cake
The Most Unexplained Events In History | George Takei’s Oh Myyy
History is littered with unsolved mysteries. Whether those answers are buried somewhere or lost forever, it doesn't stop people from wondering or hypothesizi..."One of my best friends has talked to me about this issue. He is a big guy (6'5") with a beard. He definitely has a presence."
"Even though he is amazing with kids he avoids them because he tries so hard to avoid a sense of impropriety. It's very sad to me that he misses out on the joy kids can bring because of societal expectations and biases."
"Similarly if a woman is walking alone at night he will go out of his way to walk on the other side of the street or farther away from her so she doesn't feel threatened."
"These discussions with him gave me a lot of perspective. As a woman I have not really worried about my presence being intimidating or threatening to others, so hearing how hard he tries to make others comfortable made me kind of sad." - deej394
"Came here to post this. I'm 6'4 250lbs and tend to walk to the gym at night in the city."
"The shortest route is a side street which is basically an alley at some parts. I tend to walk somewhat quickly and I always somehow end up behind a younger woman."
"Undoubtedly I scare them as I try to walk quickly past to avoid being any more looming as a dangerous person as I might look. I always feel guilty like I'm doing something wrong when I'm just trying to walk. I didn't ask to be this big haha" - Rybobo
Pumpkin Abduction
Tired Good Night GIFGiphy"I live in Rhode Island. At our zoo we have a pumpkin festival in October. The tickets are expensive but it's fun and they have pumpkin beer."
"Anyway I bought two tickets for me and a friend to go. That day he was sick and canceled. I ended up taking my nearly two-year-old daughter."
"We had a good time. When I was going home I realized that it was nearly 8:00 pm and we hadn't eaten dinner, so we stopped into a local restaurant."
"My daughter was well behaved. We ate dinner and left. She was a little testy as we got to the car but nothing unusual in any way."
"We go home and my daughter goes to sleep."
"About a half an hour later, a cop shows up. He said someone from the restaurant called the police thinking I abducted her."
"They said she seemed 'too quiet' when we were eating. It was 8:30 when we ate and her bedtime is normally 8:00 so yeah she was probably a little sedate."
"But seriously!?"
"Anyway, we wake up our daughter and she's clearly in no danger. The cop apologized and left. To be fair to the cop, I think he thought the whole thing was ridiculous from the start but had to do his job."
"But this would have NEVER would have happened if my wife would have brought my daughter and not me! I was basically accused of being a child trafficker because my daughter was a little sleepy." - Geri-psychiatrist-RI
Compliments, Please
olivia culpo adam GIFGiphy"Never received a compliment in my life expect the time a girl told me she liked my boots in 8th grade."
"Thanks Maddie I appreciate it still" - Aviator122
"I sometimes hate how much I crave compliments." - tpaolicchi
"I'm 38 and the last time someone complimented on my looks or appearance was when I was 30 at my old job when a woman said my glasses and hat combo really suited me." - Fkyourslipper
"It's super rare, for sure."
"A woman at the bus stop once told me my sweater looked nice and I instinctually asked 'Excuse me?' thinking I misheard, 'cause there's no way a woman just complimented me...'cause that never happens."
"It was super nice, made my day. Ladies: compliment men too, please." - putinmy@ss
Support Systems?
Jimmy Fallon No GIF by The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy FallonGiphy"There's no support for men. Try to file for food stamps as a single man, or see how the courts treat you if you get a divorce, or talk about needing therapy."
"You get the same advice every time: 'go work out, throw yourself into your work, get a hobby.' "
"One of the most destructive, most infuriating thing people can say is, 'Man Up.' "
"Well, I'm not a stoic piece of driftwood, I'm human. I have feelings and basic needs just like anyone else - and its literally deadly to hold that sh*t in."
"Yeah, our fathers and their fathers held their feelings in, but they also dropped dead in their 40s and 50s of massive heart attacks." - GhostOnToast
Creepy At A Kid's Movie
Bill Hader Popcorn GIF by Saturday Night LiveGiphy"Per my dad who loves animation:"
"Now that my kids are grown, I have to wait a few weeks when a movie comes out so I can see it and not be the creepy solo older man at a kids movie." - M0ck_duck
"I went to see 'The Secret of Nimh' a few years ago back when the Alamo Drafthouse would show kids movies on Saturday mornings."
"I bought a soda, some popcorn and settled in."
"About 30 minutes in I realized an employee was standing directly behind me (I was in the back row.) He didn't move until the movie was over." - cbpantskiller
Responsibility
Tired Tv Land GIF by TV Land ClassicGiphy"Kind of a love/hate thing, but being responsible - for the wife, the kids, the house, cars, everything."
"At the end of the day, when something goes wrong or everyone is scared, everyone looks down the table to me and says 'What are we gonna do?' "
"Goes with the role of being the 'man of the house,' but it does wear me out." - Opposite-Algae8912
No One Told My Heart
Sad Sterling K Brown GIF by This Is UsGiphy"For me, it was when my wife and I lost 4 children during late term pregnancy in just 5 years. It was loss after loss after loss."
"Everyone always asked me how my wife was doing and told me how sorry they felt for her. Not once did anyone ask or care about how I was doing."
"I put my wife first always, but it would have been nice for someone to care about how I was doing. I felt like nobody did; even my mother said guys don't get attached till the child is born."
"I guess no one told my heart that rule." - Successful_Panic7184
Thanks, Homer
Homer Simpson Reaction GIFGiphy"Dumb Husband Syndrome."
"Thanks to Homer Simpson, Phil Dunphy, Al Bundy, etc., the entire world seems to believe that your standard husband is too stupid to accomplish even the most mundane task on his own."
"I've seen a lot of guys (myself included) just going about their business and people feel compelled to step in and correct them or tell them how to do something." - SeaTie
Now that you've read what Reddit has to say, what are your thoughts on some of the tougher aspects of being a man?
- People Explain What They Hate Most About The World Today - George Takei ›
- People Break Down What People Did That Inspired Immediate Hatred - George Takei ›
- People Confess What They Learned Embarrassingly Late In Life - George Takei ›
- People Confess Which Things They Hate About Their Partner But Can't Tell Them - George Takei ›
- People Break Down What Absolutely Deserves All The Hate It Gets - George Takei ›
Experiencing death is a fascinating and frightening idea.
Who doesn't want to know what is waiting for us on the other side?
But so many of us want to know and then come back and live a little longer.
It would be so great to be sure there is something else.
But the whole dying part is not that great, so we'll have to rely on other people's accounts.
Redditor AlaskaStiletto wanted to hear from everyone who has returned to life, so they asked:
"Redditors who have 'died' and come back to life, what did you see?"
Sensations
Happy Good Vibes GIF by Major League SoccerGiphy"My dad's heart stopped when he had a heart attack and he had to be brought back to life. He kept the paper copy of the heart monitor which shows he flatlined. He said he felt an overwhelming sensation of peace, like nothing he had felt before."
PeachesnPain
Recovery
"I had surgical complications in 2010 that caused a great deal of blood loss. As a result, I had extremely low blood pressure and could barely stay awake. I remember feeling like I was surrounded by loved ones who had passed. They were in a circle around me and I knew they were there to guide me onwards. I told them I was not ready to go because my kids needed me and I came back."
"My nurse later said she was afraid she’d find me dead every time she came into the room."
"It took months, and blood transfusions, but I recovered."
good_golly99
Take Me Back
"Overwhelming peace and happiness. A bright airy and floating feeling. I live a very stressful life. Imagine finding out the person you have had a crush on reveals they have the same feelings for you and then you win the lotto later that day - that was the feeling I had."
"I never feared death afterward and am relieved when I hear of people dying after suffering from an illness."
rayrayrayray
Free
The Light Minnie GIF by (G)I-DLEGiphy"I had a heart surgery with near-death experience, for me at least (well the possibility that those effects are caused by morphine is also there) I just saw black and nothing else but it was warm and I had such inner peace, its weird as I sometimes still think about it and wish this feeling of being so light and free again."
TooReDTooHigh
This is why I hate surgery.
You just never know.
Shocked
Giphy"More of a near-death experience. I was electrocuted. I felt like I was in a deep hole looking straight up in the sky. My life flashed before me. Felt sad for my family, but I had a deep sense of peace."
Admirable_Buyer6528
The SOB
"Nursing in the ICU, we’ve had people try to die on us many times during the years, some successfully. One guy stood out to me. His heart stopped. We called a code, are working on him, and suddenly he comes to. We hadn’t vented him yet, so he was able to talk, and he started screaming, 'Don’t let them take me, don’t let them take me, they are coming,' he was scared and yelling."
"Then he yelled a little more, as we tried to calm him down, he screamed, 'No, No,' and gestured towards the end of the bed, and died again. We didn’t get him back. It was seriously creepy. We called his son to tell him the news, and the son said basically, 'Good, he was an SOB.'”
1-cupcake-at-a-time
Colors
"My sister died and said it was extremely peaceful. She said it was very loud like a train station and lots of talking and she was stuck in this area that was like a curtain with lots of beautiful colors (colors that you don’t see in real life according to her) a man told her 'He was sorry, but she had to go back as it wasn’t her time.'"
Hannah_LL7
"I had a really similar experience except I was in an endless garden with flowers that were colors I had never seen before. It was quiet and peaceful and a woman in a dress looked at me, shook her head, and just said 'Not yet.' As I was coming back, it was extremely loud, like everyone in the world was trying to talk all at once. It was all very disorienting but it changed my perspective on life!"
huntokarrr
The Fog
"I was in a gray fog with a girl who looked a lot like a young version of my grandmother (who was still alive) but dressed like a pioneer in the 1800s she didn't say anything but kept pulling me towards an opening in the wall. I kept refusing to go because I was so tired."
"I finally got tired of her nagging and went and that's when I came to. I had bled out during a c-section and my heart could not beat without blood. They had to deliver the baby and sew up the bleeders. refill me with blood before they could restart my heart so, like, at least 12 minutes gone."
Fluffy-Hotel-5184
Through the Walls
"My spouse was dead for a couple of minutes one miserable night. She maintains that she saw nothing, but only heard people talking about her like through a wall. The only thing she remembers for absolute certain was begging an ER nurse that she didn't want to die."
"She's quite alive and well today."
Hot-Refrigerator6583
Well let's all be happy to be alive.
It seems to be all we have.
Trying to lose weight is a struggle understood by many people regardless of size.
The goal of reaching a healthy weight may seem unattainable, but with diet and exercise, it can pay off through persistence and discipline.
Seeing the pounds gradually drop off can also be a great motivator and incentivize people to stay the course.
Those who've achieved their respective weight goals shared their experiences when Redditor apprenti8455 asked:
"People who lost a lot of weight, what surprises you the most now?"
Redditors didn't see these coming.
Shiver Me Timbers
"I’m always cold now!"
– Telrom_1
"I had a coworker lose over 130 pounds five or six years ago. I’ve never seen him without a jacket on since."
– r7ndom
"140 lbs lost here starting just before COVID, I feel like that little old lady that's always cold, damn this top comment was on point lmao."
– mr_remy
Drawing Concern
"I lost 100 pounds over a year and a half but since I’m old(70’s) it seems few people comment on it because (I think) they think I’m wasting away from some terminal illness."
– dee-fondy
"Congrats on the weight loss! It’s honestly a real accomplishment 🙂"
"Working in oncology, I can never comment on someone’s weight loss unless I specifically know it was on purpose, regardless of their age. I think it kind of ruffles feathers at times, but like I don’t want to congratulate someone for having cancer or something. It’s a weird place to be in."
– LizardofDeath
Unleashing Insults
"I remember when I lost the first big chunk of weight (around 50 lbs) it was like it gave some people license to talk sh*t about the 'old' me. Old coworkers, friends, made a lot of not just negative, but harsh comments about what I used to look like. One person I met after the big loss saw a picture of me prior and said, 'Wow, we wouldn’t even be friends!'”
"It wasn’t extremely common, but I was a little alarmed by some of the attention. My weight has been up and down since then, but every time I gain a little it gets me a little down thinking about those things people said."
– alanamablamaspama
Not Everything Goes After Losing Weight
"The loose skin is a bit unexpected."
– KeltarCentauri
"I haven’t experienced it myself, but surgery to remove skin takes a long time to recover. Longer than bariatric surgery and usually isn’t covered by insurance unless you have both."
– KatMagic1977
"It definitely does take a long time to recover. My Dad dropped a little over 200 pounds a few years back and decided to go through with skin removal surgery to deal with the excess. His procedure was extensive, as in he had skin taken from just about every part of his body excluding his head, and he went through hell for weeks in recovery, and he was bedridden for a lot of it."
– Jaew96
These Redditors shared their pleasantly surprising experiences.
Shopping
"I can buy clothes in any store I want."
– WaySavvyD
"When I lost weight I was dying to go find cute, smaller clothes and I really struggled. As someone who had always been restricted to one or two stores that catered to plus-sized clothing, a full mall of shops with items in my size was daunting. Too many options and not enough knowledge of brands that were good vs cheap. I usually went home pretty frustrated."
– ganache98012
No More Symptoms
"Lost about 80 pounds in the past year and a half, biggest thing that I’ve noticed that I haven’t seen mentioned on here yet is my acid reflux and heartburn are basically gone. I used to be popping tums every couple hours and now they just sit in the medicine cabinet collecting dust."
– colleennicole93
Expanding Capabilities
"I'm all for not judging people by their appearance and I recognise that there are unhealthy, unachievable beauty standards, but one thing that is undeniable is that I can just do stuff now. Just stamina and flexibility alone are worth it, appearance is tertiary at best."
– Ramblonius
People Change Their Tune
"How much nicer people are to you."
"My feet weren't 'wide' they were 'fat.'"
– LiZZygsu
"Have to agree. Lost 220 lbs, people make eye contact and hold open doors and stuff"
"And on the foot thing, I also lost a full shoe size numerically and also wear regular width now 😅"
– awholedamngarden
It's gonna take some getting used to.
Bones Everywhere
"Having bones. Collarbones, wrist bones, knee bones, hip bones, ribs. I have so many bones sticking out everywhere and it’s weird as hell."
– Princess-Pancake-97
"I noticed the shadow of my ribs the other day and it threw me, there’s a whole skeleton in here."
– bekastrange
Knee Pillow
"Right?! And they’re so … pointy! Now I get why people sleep with pillows between their legs - the knee bones laying on top of each other (side sleeper here) is weird and jarring."
– snic2030
"I lost only 40 pounds within the last year or so. I’m struggling to relate to most of these comments as I feel like I just 'slimmed down' rather than dropped a ton. But wow, the pillow between the knees at night. YES! I can relate to this. I think a lot of my weight was in my thighs. I never needed to do this up until recently."
– Strongbad23
More Mobility
"I’ve lost 100 lbs since 2020. It’s a collection of little things that surprise me. For at least 10 years I couldn’t put on socks, or tie my shoes. I couldn’t bend over and pick something up. I couldn’t climb a ladder to fix something. Simple things like that I can do now that fascinate me."
"Edit: Some additional little things are sitting in a chair with arms, sitting in a booth in a restaurant, being able to shop in a normal store AND not needing to buy the biggest size there, being able to easily wipe my butt, and looking down and being able to see my penis."
– dma1965
People making significant changes, whether for mental or physical health, can surely find a newfound perspective on life.
But they can also discover different issues they never saw coming.
That being said, overcoming any challenge in life is laudable, especially if it leads to gaining confidence and ditching insecurities.