"Reddit user kiralynnkk asked: 'If you got married after less than six months of dating, what’s your story?'"
It's nerve-wracking to trust love quickly.
Some people wait years to marry and it still doesn't work out.
So who is to say what is the perfect time from "Hello" to "I Do?"
Nobody. That's who.
Maybe the heart really does know what it wants right away.
We'll never know until we try.
Courtship can be slow or rapid.
It's all a matter of the heart.
Redditor kiralynnkk wanted to hear from the couples who couldn't wait any longer to get married, so they asked:
"If you got married after less than six months of dating, what’s your story?"
I'm still single.
I waited for a while.
And I've jumped quickly.
So I'm at a loss.
You Know?Winter Solstice Christmas GIF by Chippy the DogGiphy
"My friends met on Halloween, engaged on Thanksgiving, and married on New Year’s Day. They lived 900 miles from each other. Still married 30+ years later."
"Explanation: 'When you know, you know, y’know?'"
"We got engaged and moved into an apartment together after about 3 1/2 months of dating, but we didn't get married for another 6 1/2 months after that because of the time it took to make the wedding arrangements. So maybe that doesn't count, but it's close."
"As to why it was so quick, I guess we just knew we wanted to be together and didn't want to wait. We've been married 33 years."
When in Vegas
"My wife is from Eastern EU and was on vacation visiting family in my US city. We met on Tinder and met at a restaurant for drinks. I still remember exactly what she looked like walking through the door. She was even prettier than her pictures (stunning) and I loved that she was well-traveled and super intelligent. On the first day we met, I told her that she would be telling our grandkids the story."
"We ended up engaged at 3 months and got married in Vegas at 5 months. We're now just over six years married with two kids, and we dropped our oldest off on his first day of preschool today."
"When I met my wife, we just clicked. we met in December, flew out of the country to meet her family in February, and moved in together in March. We will be celebrating our 6th anniversary next month."
"This is kind of how it was for my husband and I. Met early summer of 2016. Engaged by the end of summer. Married Feb of 2017 (visa process kind of had us rush that marriage bit since we had to marry within 3 months of me entering the country)."
"Just kinda knew. We'll be married for 7 years this February. Hopefully, it continues... lol."
ConfessionsHappy Birthday Reaction GIF by FriendsGiphy
"We were roommates. She confessed we had our first date, and it was just like we were supposed to be together. I always say that our first kiss felt like Chidi seeing the time knife - kind of terrifying because it was so wow, but an ultimately life-changing truth."
Ah... the roommate situation.
It's a gamble, sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.
At least you know each other first.
Decades Laterjust married love GIFGiphy
"Started dating in October, found out she was pregnant in December, married in March. 37 years, two children, and two grandchildren later we're still together and happy."
The Next Day
"Went to Ukraine to visit Chornobyl 7 years ago. The next day, sent out a bunch of messages on Tinder to everyone asking if they'd be up to give me and my mate a tour of Kyiv (which we always did, and never, ever hooked up - I'm too much of a prude for that)."
"This one lady agreed, we met in a bar for tea, hired a limo, drove around for 5 hours, and at the end of the night I told her I loved her, we met the following morning before my flight home (I ditched my mate and said I'd meet him at the airport)."
"I flew back to Kyiv 2 weeks later for the weekend, we officially became a couple. I quit my job, sold everything I owned, and emigrated 8 weeks later and we married a month after that. We've been married 7 years, have 1 child, and a second on the way."
Here We Are...
"I knew him for 10 years before we started dating and finally when we got together we said we are never breaking up no matter what. We were engaged for 6 months and got married. 16 years later here we are."
"I met my husband in middle school. We never dated, but were always friends. Drifted apart, he had a kid with a crazy lady, and I watched from afar. Ended a long-term relationship and a month later I ran into him at the gym. Went on a date, moved in a month later, pregnant 4 months later, and married 2 months after that. 2 kids (plus my step), and we celebrate our 10 years next Feb."
Decades LaterHappy Anniversary GIFGiphy
"My parents got married on the six-month anniversary of their first date. They had their 65-year wedding anniversary in August."
Happy Anniversary to all!!
Sounds like there are no time constraints on love.
"Reddit user rest_in_war asked: 'Women who said "I can fix him", what happened?'"
"I can fix them."
That is one of life's most dangerous sentences.
Love is going to turn out how it turns out.
We can help a significant other.
We can support them.
We can even guide them through the journey.
But fixing someone is not an option.
You can only fix oneself.
Plus, why would you want to fix someone?
Shouldn't we be interested in one another as we are?
Fixing someone implies that they're broken in a way you don't approve of.
That's not a great way to nurture love.
Redditor rest_in_war wanted to hear from the ladies out there about the guys they tried to change, so they asked:
"Women who said 'I can fix him,' what happened?"
If they need fixing, send them to a mechanic. (Therapist)
But don't wait around for the bill.
Moving OnSeth Meyers Lol GIF by Late Night with Seth MeyersGiphy
"With his newfound self-esteem, he left me for someone better."
Over & Over
"Well, I failed at fixing him but learned a lot about myself in the process. I have no hate for him- if anything I hope every day he does the work to fix himself because I saw the potential and I did care for him once. I hate to think that he’ll just continue life repeating the same patterns over and over."
"I can say for myself, yes there was some damage done for sure! But I’ve never been the type to linger in my hurt. So, I learned a lot about myself, good and bad, and I’ve chosen to let the hurt go that he caused me and work on me. It’s been rocky here and there if I’m being honest- but if I could put that much effort and time into trying to fix someone else, why would I not do the same for myself?!?"
Worse by the Day
"I didn't and he got crazier. No idea what has happened to him now and I don't care."
"Well, my grandma said 'I can fix him,' ended up pregnant and alone. My mother never had a relationship with her biological dad (luckily my grandma met my grandad who then raised my mom). My mom said 'I can fix him,' and ended up alone with a baby. Was a single mom for 15 years. Luckily she's now married to my stepdad who's a great man."
"I said 'I can fix him' and tried my best and wasted 4 years of my youth. LUCKILY I didn't have kids with him, but he wanted to. I came out the other side utterly broken and it took quite a few years to repair myself. My self-confidence is still nonexistent, even though I've been married to a great man for 15 years."
"So, one word of advice; don't."
"Ended up broken too."
"Reminds me of that tweet that goes something like, 'I convinced my therapist to confront her husband about not liking her tweets. She may not be able to fix me, but at least I can make us both worse.'"
A plan like this can only lead to self-harm.
We deserve more.
For the BetterValentines Day Love GIF by Boomerang OfficialGiphy
"I was the one who was fixed. My husband helped me work through my trauma and got me into therapy after we got married. I learned to take accountability for my actions and became much more honest with him. when we got together, I was absolutely aimless, but now I have a genuine plan for my future and I'm so excited to work hard with him in creating a comfortable and happy life together.
"I have always wanted to change for the better and wanted more for my life but he was certainly the push I needed to get there. He's been such a fantastic influence on me and I can never thank him enough for being my rock; I can only hope to repay him for everything he's done for me."
Clean it Up
"I actually did 'fix him' while we were together- cleaned up (haircuts and regular shaving, clothes that actually fit, etc) and got him a job. The week after I helped him get his own apartment he cheated on me. He almost immediately reverted to how he was before, last I saw he was back to baggy pants and homeless man hair/facial hair. Lost his job and apartment and the girl left him... lol."
"Well, I am completely emotionally unavailable, and I no longer wish to give people my heart like that again."
"I know how you feel because I’ve been in that boat before. Please, when the right person comes along, do not be afraid to open up again. Those scars will ruin future relationships if you don’t let them heal. And all that’s obviously to say is let yourself be ready and don’t rush it. It gets better."
Back to my country...
"I was the one who was fixed."
"I met an exchange student when I was 19, and dropped out of college (was failing anyway) to follow her to her country. After about a year there, I was so head over heels in love I was sure I’d marry her. There was no way I was going to be a good husband with no job prospects, not knowing her language, etc."
"I went back to my country to get a menial job in a factory, get myself back into school, study her language, make something of myself. Whereas I was failing out of college when I left, I ended up getting a 4.0 when I went back."
"She flew to see me a few times and the last time broke up with me. I was devastated. But the fire had already been lit and I feel I’ve been quite successful in life over the last 25 years, and I am so thankful for her influence."
Getting WildLets Go Reaction GIF by Mason RamseyGiphy
"He left me because the grass was greener. I built him up so much that he was sure he could do better and go out to 'sow his wild oats.' 10 years later and he's close to 40 still living at home and hasn't had a girlfriend since."
What have we learned?
We can only fix ourselves.
And it's ok that love doesn't always conquer all.
When it comes to flirting, everyone has their preferences of how they like to be flirted with. Some people like cleverly crafted pickup lines.
I always thought pickup lines were a cheap way to get someone's attention. That being said, there are some good ones out there. I've been on the receiving end of both. "On a scale from one to America, how free are you tonight?" and, "You must be the square root of two because I feel irrational around you."
Both got me to engage in conversation, and I even dated the guy who used the first one for a while.
I'm not the only one that knows some good pickup lines. Redditors have both heard and used some pickup lines and are eager to share their favorites.
It all started when Redditor Sauce_Dealer420 asked:
"What's the best pickup line of all time?"
Read It And See
"You put the sexy in dyslexic."
"This made me laugh so hard."
"Because I can read properly."
"This girl I used to work with and I went to a bar after work and we’re having fun, and she leans over to tell me a joke. And she says:"
"Three boy mice and a girl mouse were all stuck in a room with no doors and no windows. One of the boy mice asked the girl mouse how to get out and she said, “Sleep with me tonight, and I’ll tell you in the morning.""
"The next day, he is gone. The second boy mouse asks the girl mouse how he got out and she says, “Sleep with me tonight, and I’ll tell you in the morning.""
"Next day, he’s gone too."
"So now the girl telling me this joke says to me, “Do you want to know how the last mouse gets out of the box?”
"And I say “yes.""
"And she says, “Sleep with ME tonight, and I’ll tell you in the morning”. All this while staring me in the eyes and smiling."
"I said, “Check please bartender!!""
"I forgot to ask her in the morning, but that was the best pickup line I’ve ever heard."
"The odds we sleep together are 50% because half of us agree so far."
"Math is always super sexy."
Money, Money, Money
"Hey girl, are you the English financial system? Because I'm about to give you a weak pound."
"Yo girl, do you know exchange rates? Because Euro 10."
""Are you a magician? Cuz every time I look at you, everyone else disappears.""
"This line got me a wife and three kids. 😊"
"Are you a beaver? Cuz damn."
"If you were a fruit you'd be a fineapple."
"Hi, do you want to go for a ride on a Harley?"
"(My name is Harley) 😁"
"If I asked you for a date would the answer to that question be the same as the answer to this question?"
"I got blue screen in my head."
"You can't lose. Say no, the answer is yes. Say yes, the answer is also yes."
"Dang sounds kinda creepy writing it out like that. Still clever wordplay though."
"My go-to was always:"
"I used to be a history teacher, so I know lots of important dates. Want to help me make another one?"
"A little corny, but it usually worked."
"That one actually worked with my ex on the first try."
"-Hey, do you like water?"
"-Then you like me in 70% already."
"Would you date a complete stranger?"
"If she says “yes” you’re in."
If she says “no.”
“Then allow me to introduce myself.”"
"Once a girl came to me and told there was somebody who thought I was cute."
"I asked her who and she said “Me.""
"You have to have a handful of limes available to do this:"
"Hold the limes, drop the limes in front of the lucky person. Then say 'Sorry, I'm not very good at pick up limes.'"
"Best one that worked for me was:"
"Me: How do you like your eggs?"
"Her: Over easy, why?"
"Me: Just making sure I have things right for when I make you breakfast in the morning."
The Best Line
"How you doin?"
"There was a time when this was the ONLY line you could use!"
That line would definitely work on me!
Breaking up is hard to do no matter who initiated it.
But once time has passed and exes have moved on, the healing process can be jarred by a surprise.
A regretfilled person may try and make contact with the one they broke up with and ask for forgiveness, or the person who had their heart broken could also reappear and plead for a fresh new start.
The outcome depends on how much, or how little, the spark of love remains.
Curious to hear more of this scenario from strangers online, Redditor XenaVonKeksdose asked:
"What would you say to your ex if they suddenly showed up at your door?"
For these Redditors, it wouldn't be a happy reunion.
"It ranges from 'come on in and make yourself comfortable' to 'get the f'k out of here' , depending on which one shows up."
"Odds of it being the one who got away: low."
"Odds of it being the one who took 5 years to understand what 'f'k off' meant: pretty high."
It's A Nightmare
"Screaming. They've passed."
"Similar situation here. I did have a dream that my late wife showed up at my door. She said, 'There was a mix up at the coroner, you wouldn’t believe what I’ve been through.”'
"Still in the dream we talked for a bit about nothing. Then I said, 'Wait, what about the life insurance, do we have to pay it back?' And just after that I woke up."
"Slowly closes the door while maintaining eye contact."
"Also aggressively locks the door."
Some would show traces of resentment.
"The f'k do you want? And how did you get this address?"
Too Little Too Late
"You couldn't put in effort in messaging me, but you have effort now to see me months after we break up‽"
"Wait, if you’re here who’s running hell?”
"Who’s guarding HADES."
Hit 'Em Where It Hurts
"I lost weight... You seem to have found it."
"now get the f'k off my lawn."
Others shared less bitter responses.
"Honestly, I apologize. I know dealing with my prior alcoholism must have been a nightmare. I regret causing you and anyone else pain and hope you are happy. I am a year into sobriety and can understand why it ended. I wish you well."
"Edit: Since this is getting so much traction, I just want to say thanks for all the support. This could honestly be directed at a few of my exes. I am happily married now to someone that also got a taste of my drinking. We stuck it out while I got sober and I have to credit her with being an amazing support system. I also need to shout out r/stopdrinking for providing reinforcement on a daily basis. It is a great community. Naltrexone was also a major part of it. I can't change the past but I think I have a much better hold on the future."
Someone That I Used To Know
"I've been married for almost 25 years, I don't know if I would even recognize any exes."
"Yep. That person went from 'ex' to 'someone I once dated' years ago."
"I'm sorry for the way I treated you."
"Good on you for growing."
"I’d say hello! What are you doing here? It has been a long time."
Wish You Well
"A lot of snarky or comical answers in here, but I'll try to be as sincere as I can."
"My first major ex, first time I got my heart broken: I would sincerely hope that she's doing well. She broke my heart, but it was for the best and it made me into the man I am today. I don't want to think of how much worse I would be if she hadn't given me a reality check wake-up-call. So really just 'Hey, how have you been? I hope the years have been kind to you.'"
"My most recent ex, the first and only time I've had to break someone's heart: I honestly just hope that she can forgive me for having to make taking care of myself and my needs the priority in my life. She's an amazing woman, kindergarten school teacher, unanimously adored by everyone that meets her. But we met via travels, and lived in two different states. Circumstances shifted and seeing each other became much less frequent. Neither of us wanted to quit our jobs and chuck a grenade into our lives and careers. Eventually, for my own mental and emotional health, I had to call it. I truly hope she finds someone amazing, she deserves it. So I would just sincerely hope that she understands, and has moved on."
I once showed up at an exes door after I broke up with him about a month prior.
I genuinely loved and missed him after making the very difficult decision to end things due to conflicting circumstances that kept us from maintaining a healthy relationship.
But I quickly learned that if you did the breaking up, you should respect the other person's space for a respectable amount of time.
I went to visit him at the apartment where we lived together and a new lover answered the door for him after there was a long period of giggles and lots of feet shuffling from behind the door.
Clearly, he was doing just fine.
Of course, I wasn't welcomed in and was asked what I wanted, to which I had no answer but, "do you have any mail for me?"
Small acts of kindness that only a few know about can change the world.
You never know.
One smile can change one person's day.
And that person could carry it on.
So doing it ourselves may be the only answer.Redditor sashayingthru wanted to discuss the ways we know the world is still good, so they asked:
"What small act of kindness were you once shown that you will never forget?"
As someone who has waited on many tables, just tip properly.
You'll go to Heaven.
StrangersRobin Williams Dancing GIF by 20th Century Fox Home EntertainmentGiphy
"I once walked to a store to buy bags for my vacuum cleaner and I forgot to take my wallet. The shop owner gave me the bags, shook my hand, and told me to bring him to money tomorrow. He put his trust in a total stranger to do the right thing and I did."
In the Rain
"A man in a full business suit with a briefcase handed me an umbrella in a torrential rain storm and wouldn't take no for an answer. I still had to walk through Times Square to get to the train and I'm sure he got soaked going wherever he was going. A couple of weeks later, I gave the umbrella to a lost girl in my neighborhood when it started to rain and she didn't have one. Felt like the universe wanted it to happen."
"I'll never forget that man though."
Leggo my Lego
"When I was maybe 4 or 5 years old, I made friends with another kid in an airport, and he was playing with a couple glued glued-together Lego cars. Me and that kid played for like an hour with those things and when it was time to go our separate ways and board the plane, the kid insisted I keep one of the cars, and while I insisted he should keep them, he said it was proof that we were friends, and to this day roughly 20 years later, I still have that car packed up with my childhood mementos box."
"That friend of mine was a good kid. Hope he’s doin' well."
Don't Cry Tammy
"My husband and I were sitting on our porch holding hands and crying, just feeling overwhelmed because we were waiting to find out whether or not my tumor was cancerous. Our neighbor saw it when he was coming home. About half an hour later he came over with some freshly baked cookies. He didn't even say anything, just smiled, handed them to us, and then went back home."
"Just thinking about that moment has me crying again. From his kindness, not the fear. Tammy the Ti**y Tumor turned out benign!"
Coasting...Fail Will Ferrell GIF by Paramount PicturesGiphy
"I literally coasted into a gas station out of gas on my motorcycle, then realized I didn't have my wallet. Some lady saw me patting all my pockets and I was upset and offered to fill up my tank. I only let her put $5 in, which on a bike is a lot. But it meant so much to me."
Give people gas as often as possible..
Pay it forward.
Generosityhappy silent film GIF by Charlie ChaplinGiphy
"My realtor took less commission so that I could get my dream home. It was a rare find in a great neighborhood."
"Years ago my car got egged real badly overnight while parked on the driveway of our duplex. We had to go somewhere the next morning so took the wife’s car. Came back hours later and my car was shining like new on the driveway. The neighbor whose name I didn’t even know at that point had washed it for me while we were away."
Are those still a thing?
"I was in maybe 4th grade and my parents just had my younger sister, so newborn focused. I went to my school lunch, opened my paper bag (are those still a thing?), and unwrapped the foil holding my sandwich. There was nothing inside. It was actually just 2 slices of dry white slice bread and I was sad."
"Literally, my table mates all chipped in various components and made me the most amazing ham and cheese sandwich I’ve ever had. I’ve been chasing that dragon of ham sandwich since but I’m sure it was the response and not the ingredients that I loved."
"19 years old, first apartment, first winter, first winter utility bill. I smiled and told my coworker I'd just pay it, skip lunch, and eat cheap Mac and cheese for dinner. It'll be ok. All that month co-workers accidentally got extra chips from the vending machine. A wife packed an extra sandwich. A box of my favorite crackers would be on my desk when I came in. It was still hard but I didn't starve. Thanks, you guys."
Just TearsBig Brother Omg GIF by Global TVGiphy
"I was on the subway, sitting there crying because I had just ended a relationship. I wasn't making any noise, just tears, but the guy sitting next to me gave me some tissues. I'll never forget that."
Some of the best people ride the subway.
Everyone has tissues.