Therapists can be hit or miss. Someone told me once that finding the right therapist is like dating--you have to find one that you really vibe with. This is so you don't end up with one you're uncomfortable with, like when I had an eighty-year-old therapist who told me about her sex life (true story).
There are therapists out there that will just give the most terrible advice. Goes to show you how important it is to find one that is unbiased, empathetic, and non-judgemental.
Ashiechh asked: What is the worst thing that a therapist has ever told you?
It always sucks when you have a therapist who truly does not understand you, and doesn’t even try to.
Not an appropriate response.​
When I told her I was suicidal, she said, "That is selfish. You're punishing your family."
God this is such a common thing people say to people considering suicide, and I really think they consider it to be a statement of value. I don't get it.
Well that’s weirdly sexist.​
michelle pfeiffer why dont you want kids GIF by mother!
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That I was mentally ill because I didn't want children. Like that I had a totally separate, distinct mental illness from the MDD I was there for, because I didn't want or like children.
She spent a long time trying to "cure" me of it.
​At least she was a good fit for you!
My therapist made fun of me when I told her I thought I was schizophrenic. I was absolutely shocked. But then she explained what schizophrenia was and that she was pretty sure I didn't have it. Gotta say, it was in a period in which I thought I was going crazy. Surprisingly enough, her no-nonsense and direct approach was something that appealed to me. After 20 sessions all was well and she was right all along: I suffered from hypochrondiasis. It's when you think you're suffering from all kinds of things.
My therapist was absolutely the best fit for me.
Terrible advice.
I was sixteen, my parents had mental issues and I was suffering a lot. She told me that if I couldn't handle it I should quit my studies and left my home. I had to remind her that in our country you can't work if you are under eighteen, and what a terrible idea was stop studying. I left and never came back.
​When a therapist misguides a patient, it can end up being super traumatizing. And it’s sad how often this happens.
Not a good intro to therapy.​
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It wasn't so much what he said, more just his demeanor and body language.
He yawned through most of the session and kept looking at the clock next to me every couple of minutes. He just gave off an air of absolute disinterest and boredom.
After resisting going to therapy for years and basically being urged to go by friends, having this as my first interaction with a therapist was a major letdown.
​I’m sorry, WHAT?
Me: Acne. Bad teeth. Puberty. Tons of Insecurities. Extreme shyness. Depression.
Therapist: I think the reason why you're 18 and don't have a girlfriend yet is because you're gay.
Dude.
This is horrifying.
A therapist encouraged the Attachment Therapy I was undergoing. I only recently was made aware that sh!t was f**ked up. I actually got that realization from an AskReddit post that was "What is the darkest internet Rabbit Hole you've gone down?"
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Attachment_therapy <- if you want a dark internet Rabbit Hole.
For me, they called it "RAD Time" because "RAD" stood for Reactive Attachment Disorder. It still f*cks with me. I just thought it was a normal part of foster care.
I talked to my therapist about it and they told me that I "wasn't trying to get better" and "if you could just be good, and fun to be around, maybe someone would want to keep you." I recently learned that "Respectful, Responsible, Fun to be around" is pretty much the slogan for this pseudo-scientific abuse.
The PTSD still disrupts my life, but I am proud to say that in my adult life, not living under the choices of the overworked and well-meaning but misinformed turnover of social workers has changed my life for the better. I aged out of foster care. I have an organic support system now. And I am loved. I spread as much love and kindness as I can, every single f*cking day.
​Not having a good therapist can lead to some major trust issues, not just in life, but in mental health care in general.
Ok, this is incredibly illegal.
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I have a lot of problems mainly trust issues so I went to therapy for it.
Had to change therapists like 4 times because apparently, they all believe patient confidentiality is a rule that they don't have to follow.
Finally found one that treated it like it was supposed to be treated or so I thought.
She came to a school play I was in and I didn't think anything of it until I saw her social media post going into detail about what I was in therapy for and some sappy bs about how she was glad I overcame it all, how did I find this social media post you may ask, why it was on the front page of the school website because she tagged the school in it and the school decided to put it on the front page of their website for everyone to see.
​This is messed up.
"I am not able to continue seeing you anymore because your mother thinks I am helping you too much."
She was my favorite therapist too and still to this day am upset at my dysfunctional mother for making me stop seeing her.
A therapist should be someone you trust. And to anyone who read this and is now concerned about finding a therapist they can trust, just know that most of the ones out there are professional, and truly care about their patients. For every bad apple, there are five good ones.
And if one is rubbing you the wrong way, there is no shame in leaving. You deserve the best.
Money and debt are my two biggest issues. Debt just keeps building if you don't get on it. I'm too afraid to call the student loan people. I'll do it tomorrow. Whoops...
MOST IMPORTANT!!!
Think About It Reaction GIF by IdentityGiphy"Mental health. It took me years to realize how much I've dissociated. It became how I deal with everything. There are so many unhealthy ways to live your life by ignoring mental health."
Check the skies...
"Terminal velocity."
"Birds crap at up to 26,000 feet, or 14000% higher than the CN tower. When was the last time someone got killed by falling avian feces? But no, seriously. I used to work on tall buildings and radio towers. I'm also afraid of heights, so while I was up there I'd work out out how fast various things would hit the ground to distract myself."
"Air resistance is a real witch, and rotational effects make it even slower. Pennies dropped off the tallest building west of the Mississippi, the one I was on top of, would barely break 22mph. Harking a loogie over was no worse to pedestrians than pigeons."
"It was only once I got into the tools I was using that there would be an injury. A 9/16 wrench dropped 900 feet might actually kill someone, if it hit them in the head just right. The 1-inch would kill someone most of the time. Needless to say all my tools were on loops, and undroppable."
- technos
"participate"
"Disassociation. Your brain is an incredibly powerful force and it can start working against your best interests so quickly while telling you that everything is fine."
"Thank you for this. I looked up dissociation in Google from this thread. I realize I have been struggling with both derealization and depersonalization in teens, and even now to some extent. I too think physical activities and activities I am really passionate about are the ones I "participate." I can say I have been a spectator to many years of my life and not feel my own experience. It is really strange, how do we come out of it??"
I'm scared to be honest...
"Mental and emotional abuse. Damn, I'm 36 and still trying to undo the damage done my whole childhood. The pain of beatings doesn't compare to how mental and emotional abuse screws with me every day in so many ways. And even stupid stuff. I go into fight or flight mode if my boss wants to talk to me. I constantly think my friends and my husband are mad at me or sick of me. I'm scared to be honest about my feelings sometimes because I don't want to be ridiculed."
Need Zzzz...
Stressed Episode 19 GIF by The SimpsonsGiphy"A severe lack of sleep. I have no longer been able to sleep at night for some odd reason, so my brain causes me to essentially pass out during the day."
Open your mouth...
Richard Kiel Smile GIF by James Bond 007Giphy"Take care of your TEETH. Unless you want to end up with a molar shattering one day and having to get a quadruple root canal."
Dear Doctor,
"Just got gallbladder surgery! I had a pain under my right ribs off and on. Then at one point it wouldn't go away and kept getting worse. Had an ultrasound and emergency surgery like two days later. I had a huge gallstone blocking my bile duct, and it would have ruptured. Yeah pain can come and go, but if it gets to the point where it is there all the time, go to the doctor!"
Love your skin...
"Strange skin growths. One of my wife's uncles was at a family gathering that was also attended by my BIL, an ER doc. The uncle mentioned that he'd had this odd growth on his leg for some time but hadn't bothered to do anything about it. Showed it to my BIL who adamantly advised him to get seen immediately. Uncle still took his time—too many other things to do or whatever. A year on an the man is just riddled with cancer. I don't think there's much to be done other than making him as comfortable as possible at this point."
Messages...
"Email. My kid almost lost the financial aid award because it's summer; I don't have to check my email. It was an intense hustle to get everything squared away and not lose that spot at college."
- awill237
"At the beginning of all the grad school classes I TA'd for I always ended the first day by asking, "Who here has a smartphone? Who has an email app on their phone? Who has their student email account synced with the app?"
"It was always all hands raised, all hands, two or three hands. I would make them set it up before they left. Checking your email in the morning and evening takes maybe 5 minutes on average unless you are a very important person in some organization who should really be checking more often!"
the long list...
list GIFGiphy"Headaches, skin cancer, tooth pain, kids, UTI which can turn into kidney infection, wound infection, bowel disease, debt, bad relationship."
The list is endless. So just start chipping away. Stay on top of it. Teeth and mind first. Stay calm.
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