People Divulge Which Things They Regret Ever Telling Their Ex
Reddit user Quintowne asked: 'What do you regret telling your ex?'
Romance isn't easy and, sometimes, leads to regret.
A lot of times, those regrets are about something you said to or told your ex.
Sometimes, it's regret about the relationship altogether. Other times, it's regretting saying something that led to a breakup. And others it's regretting saying something when you should've just said nothing and left.
Whatever the case, we all have those regrets. Redditors certainly do, and they are ready to share what they regret saying to their ex.
It all started when Redditor Quintowne asked:
"What do you regret telling your ex?"
Cheater, Cheater
"Saying anything after finding out he cheated. Shoulda just left silently tbh"
– tornteddie
"I wish I had done this, too. Looking back, it would have been not only more satisfying but also reduced the trauma in general."
"Well over it now, but man, I wish I had just disappeared."
– eeEmmerich
"I found out my ex was cheating 4 hours into a 5 hour drive to a theme park when she gave me her phone to text her mum back."
She threatened to leave me there unless I got back with her so I wish I just hadn’t said anything until we got home."
She still denied it despite overwhelming evidence and blamed me for all of it."
I literally showed her a text of her say to him that “thanks for letting me take you to the Xmas party as my boyfriend..." Her response to me was basically “lalalalalalala” every time I tried to talk or that I was taking it out of context."
This was a party she had said a ton of times that you weren’t allowed to take a partner with you."
It was the most awkward day of my life, and once she had gotten over the part where she wanted to leave me there, she kept me there until 10pm until I said I would take her back after falsely “accusing her.""
"We only left because security in the car park said they would tow her car if she didn’t leave. Then we drove 5 hours back with work the next day so I only had an hour or two sleep."
"I dumped her a** once I got it in a text that she admitted it and somehow her friends and family still took her side saying she wouldn’t ever do that."
"She then stalked me for 2 years."
"Yeah my first relationship was a wild ride for years."
"I really wish I had just ghosted her and left without explanation."
– Interesting_Tone6532
Money For Nothing
"The combination to my wall safe. She took about $40,000 in gold and silver."
"Then I had to take her back and get her to trust me before she gave it back (which was a little over 3 more months). Then I had to dump her again. And then she broke all the windows in my house. But she got arrested since it was on camera. She spent 12 days in jail and had to do 100 hours of community service. As soon as it was done, she tried to set me house on fire. She ended up in jail for 3 years for attempted arson. And last I heard, she met a guy, got dumped, and tried to burn down the bar he owned. She’s in prison now. Not sure how long. Don’t care. I moved out of state. Hope she doesn’t find me."
– Myzyri
Did You Know...?
"Opening up about anything. Turns out whenever I said anything to her, she would spread it to her friends and other lover."
– Goose_Gamer_26
"Mine as well, terrible people."
– AcanthocephalaAny78
Oof!
"“Sure we can get a joint bank account.”"
"Man I don’t even have a joint bank account with my wife :-D haha. That’s levels of crazy trust."
– Paratwa
Speak Now
""I do.""
– Hemenucha
"I regret asking “will you marry me?” more."
– MohawkElGato
""We both made mistakes", she said when she left me."
""We did. You, lied and cheated on me. I, married you.""
– daniu
Dumb Love
""I forgive you" (after the first time she cheated). - It was dumb, dumb, dumb - just f**king stupid - as in I should not be allowed out of the house without adult supervision stupid. Did I mention it was dumb? And that I was a f**king idiot?"
– Deleted User
"Lmao it’s okay. Love makes us dumb, blind and basically incapable of functioning. We learn tho :)"
– the_ocean_in_a_drop
What's In A Name?
"My name."
"I wish I'd never met him."
– stardust591
Ouch!
"She told me that I was angry."
"I told her that I stopped being angry months before."
"She asked if I wasn’t angry, what was I?"
"I told her that I was bored."
"We’d been separated for 6 months at that point and I was waiting for her to deal with some of her issues so we could actually move towards divorce. A year later nothing has changed and I’m still bored, but recognise that it wasn’t a helpful thing to say."
– inactiveuser247
"The opposite of love isnt hate, its apathy."
– Trapped_Mechanic
A Heavy Loss
"“I’ll store my sh*t here for now and will pick it up later.”"
"...crazy ex sells my pristine childhood collection of consoles/videogames and a bunch of sh*t after we breakup."
– loztriforce
"Old games and consoles!? And they were pristine!? Dude, you gotta sell her organs at that point."
– Goose_Gamer_26
Went On For Too Long
"I have a pretty weird one."
"I dated someone from out of country until COVID. But the thing is - we didn't really break up. She just tried to lure me to move to where she was.. during a pandemic... when I was newly unemployed.. and without health insurance in the US. Even with that, I said I would - and then I just didn't hear from her for months."
"I finally get an email response in mid summer indicating that she loved me and misses me, and her life is miserable and that she left Colorado for NC. I respond back. Crickets afterwards."
"We were "reddit friends", meaning we followed one another back then. A post comes up that November 2020 asking a mail related question, because her and her SO moved in together and were not getting mail for several weeks."
"My mistake was that I reached out to her and I told her exactly what I thought about what she did. That it wasn't wrong to break up with me, but it was wrong to not break up with me, keep me hanging, and then not tell me that she really just met someone else."
"What followed after that was several months of shoddy communication. She completely tried to gaslight me. But in actuality - she was creating a fake life story to cover up the fact that she basically just left me for someone else. In the end, she said some pretty nasty things to me, I said some pretty nasty things to her, and we haven't spoken since. But I could've avoided several months of emotional discomfort if I just let it be."
"She's now married to the guy she swore was just a figment of my imagination."
"If someone is going to lie to you like that, gaslight you, throw your feelings in the trash so callously - they don't deserve your time in any capacity."
– Fausto_Alarcon
I Can Hear You!
"That I am hard of hearing. The AH would use it to gaslight me by claiming I didn't hear him or his tone of voice accurately. His speaking voice was loud and he yelled a lot - I WISH I couldn't hear him."
– lawgirlamy
Talk about gaslighting!
Do you have any regrets to share? Let us know in the comments below.
Although romantic relationships are wonderful, they aren't all sunshine and rainbows. Relationships are hard. Every couple has issues.
Sometimes, you can work through these issues, but other times, they are relationship enders.
Redditors have identified the exact moment in which a relationship ended, and are ready to share.
It all started when Redditor HM333XOXO asked:
“What made you realize the relationship was over?"
What's The Point?
"When the things they did didn’t make me mad anymore. I just didn’t care. At all. So it was easy to walk away."
– claire0
"The opposit of love is not hate, but indifference"
– ZeroTwo81
"This is exactly what happened with the last long term relationship I was in before I met my wife. It took about an hour for me to go from thinking I was in love to realizing I didn't love her, I didn't hate her, I just didn't care so what was the point. The only break up I ever had where I felt nothing afterwards....no sorrow, no guilt, no relief, no freedom...just over"
– YouGuysKilledIt
Finally Free
"When my ex would state 10 seconds into every argument (which became more frequent) that "maybe we don't belong together.""
"I think it was her way of guilting me into ending the argument and switching to comforting/assuring her, but one time she said it and I was just like "well, maybe you're right""
"I knew right then that we were done, there was no walking that back, and I felt so much relief."
– EarlSandwich0045
"Dude, I’m sorry, I had that too. I remember my ex would always say “if you think you deserve someone better, you can leave”. She had a lot of trauma in her childhood, and so I always tried to take it as a defense mechanism, so I would reassure her that I didn’t want to break up, but I want to talk about things that were bothering me (mainly that she wasn’t very affectionate and never expressed her feelings, so I always felt like we were just friends) and some other issues. Anyway, I finally broke up with her one time after she said it, and there was just no fight and that was it. It’s been almost a year and I still feel like the whole relationship was a brain f*ck lol."
– OceanDevotion
Totally Callous
"When I woke up three days post surgery — there had been a cancer scare and complications — I whispered to my husband. “Could you get me some ice chips?” Mind you, I had not been out of bed or eating/drinking, much less awake. He said, stone-faced, “get them yourself.” Not at that moment, but when I processed it later, I knew I could not grow old and be vulnerable with him. Years later, his excuse was that he had just been on the phone with his mother."
– Magoo1963
Misery Loves Company
"I won an all expenses paid trip for two to the Superbowl courtesy of Budweiser. Had a bunch of extras given, vip tickets to concerts happening the days leading to the Superbowl, a superbowl experience trip, was supposed to go golfing, vip tickets to the pre-show and game tickets in a section with unlimited free booze. Then husband was a total a**hole the entire time. Refused to do any of the included activities. Only wanted to find craft beer bars to hang out in."
"At one point got sh*t-faced and wondered around the hotel in a bathrobe yelling at random people while the head of the Budweiser distributor in my town is sitting down trying to recruit me for a job. The morning of the Superbowl he decides he doesn't want to go and wants to sell the tickets instead. So I sell the tickets and hand him $14k from the sale of the tickets. (Have an interesting story about who bought them). It was that moment I understood that this person was miserable and there was nothing in the world that could ever make them happy, and I needed to get the f*ck out."
– deevee234
Not Me Anymore
"When I realized I did not like the person I had become in the relationship."
– yggdrasil_shade
"Same. I was terrified when I realised I slowly turn into his mother. Harsh, demanding, ordering him what to do, yelling if he didn't do something important after I asked and reminded 100 times etc. because when I'm being myself (nonchalant, calm, joking about stuff) he didn't lift a finger to do anything."
"Was making tea and spilled it on a counter? Unless I saw it and said "Go take a rag and wipe it" he wouldn't do it. Like, I legit tried not to tell him anything to find how long it'll take him no notice. Date plans? Only when I find a place and tell him we're going there, otherwise the only option was to hang out at his place, cook something together (if I find a recipe, write down a list of ingredients and we both go shopping) or watch a movie (if I decide what to watch)."
"Broke up because I know there are women who love this kind of dynamic, but it sure ain't me."
– aoi4eg
Disregard For Human Life
"When she told me to stop trying to control her for asking her to stop drinking and driving"
"She had a car accident a few hours later and almost died"
"I don't care if you're irresponsible with your own life but when you drink and drive you put others at risk and the fact a 24 year old had to be told not to do that was shocking"
– Iperovic
Good Advice
"An excellent counselor told me, "Do you know what's worse than coming home to an empty house? Coming home to a house that's more empty because of the person waiting there.""
– Grattytood
Girlfriends
"When I found out he was already in a relationship with a different girl before he even met me, yet still approached me and started a relationship with me. And continued to date her. While dating me. The entire time we were together."
– FigLow4974
It's All About The Compatability
"When she started getting into astrology, started treating me completely different because of my star sign."
– Waste_Stick_7134
Different Futures
"When I realized I was the only one planning our future and he was just there riding along with whatever I came up with. It felt very lonely and exhausting. I wanted a life partner that could help lead the way and carry the load with me."
– hello_enya
"This is a huge issue with relationships. He probably had much different ideas for the future he wanted. Telling you would probably end the relationship so he just played the delay game stretching out the time with you doing what he wanted as long as possible."
"Kind of why me and my ex broke up. She had the same exact issue with me that you had with your ex. Truth is she wasn’t interested in what I wanted in the future at all. Our passions are completely different and I will never give up who I am to please someone else. She’s an indoors, shopping, going out to eat, not active person. I love the outdoors, I love the ocean, I love snowboarding, skating, playing sports, fishing, camping, bonfires on the beach, camping out on the beach. She would come fishing with me occasionally and want to leave 30 minutes in because she was bored. Took me a while to realize that I was always doing things for her because I cared about her but she wouldn’t do those same things for me. She would call me a narcissist all the time. Projection? It sounds like I’m tooling on her but I still care a lot about her."
– BrokedownAlice69
No Empathy
"The doctor says, “I think you have stomach cancer. I want to scope your stomach at 5:00 am.” I was terrified. I just went home and sat stunned on the couch with the dogs for hours until she got home from work."
"She gets home. I ask her to sit down. I tell her what the doctor said. I tell her that I’ll need her to take off work the next day because i won’t be able to drive afterwards and I need her to drive me."
"“But I don’t want to miss work,” she says."
"That’s the exact moment I knew our marriage was over."
– TheMadIrishman327
Completely Done
"I hated hearing her car pull in the driveway when she got off work."
– TrickBoom414
Ouch, that's hard!
We applaud these folks for taking their leave and hopefully finding someone who does meet their needs.
Do you have anything that was the proverbial final nail in the coffin? Let us know in the comments below.
Guys Explain Why They're Scared To Get Into A Relationship
Relationships are a lot of work, and the very idea of them can be terrifying to some. Breakups hurt and starting a relationship is taking the chance of either finding the love of your life or having it all end in heartbreak.
A Reddit user who has since deleted their account asked:
"Guys who've become scared of dating/relationships, why?"
10.
Five years ago I was dating someone who I considered to be one of the best, most honest, truly good people I have ever met. We were supposed to get married. She left me abruptly, giving me neither warning nor reason for her departure.
It's hard to go back to dating after something like that. I find myself unable to trust anyone, after such a betrayal. I know this shit happens all the time, but this is my personal reason for being unable to date anyone for the past 5 years or so.
9.
I don't think I've become scared of dating. It just feels like I'm such a weird and peculiar guy that I won't find anybody with the same interests or lifestyle as me. That, coupled with the fact that I've become so comfortable just being alone on my own that a relationship feels like just an unnecessary burden and that I don't really need one to be happy.
8.
4 relationships 4 times "he's just a friend" turned out to be bullshit. The paranoia wasn't worth it so I just stopped giving a sh!t about dating and learned to enjoy being alone.
7.
crippling abandoment issues and pretty bad depression. i don't wanna hurt anyone with my own emotions
6.
I have a messy philosophy that I should be friends with someone before I could consider dating them. Then when I reach that point, I get too scared of losing what I've already built with them, so I just don't do anything.
5.
Never really got to see my parents act like they wanted to be married or loved each other, they always just seem like roommates stuck in a house together. Don't want to get 20 years in and end up in the same situation.
5.
The first girl i was ever interested in lead me on for 3 months and then emailed me saying she was joking the whole time so yeah screw getting my heart broken again. Then all my relationships lasted no more then a month.
4.
To this day, I keep a video on my desktop Mac that I recorded years ago of an ex drunk and screaming at me and throwing things and pushing me...all because I wasn't comfortable sleeping in bed with her after an argument and was trying to sleep on the couch.
For the longest time after we broke up, I was worried she might try something crazy like claim abuse. I keep that video as evidence just in case.
Once while we were dating, I even caught her trying to find the video and delete it.
3.
It's been so goddamn long. I'm 26 now and the last meaningful (if you can call it that) relationship I've had was at 18. She cheated with me, without my knowledge, on a close friend while he was at basic training. I've had one night stands and flings since that, but an actual relationship? No.
2.
My ex wife lied and took everything I built for over 15 years. Everything. 5 years on and I am still recovering from the devastation she delivered unto my life. Emotionally, mentally and economically. Am I skittish of relationships? F yeah. I am NEVER getting married again. Date? yes. Relationships? Yeah. Marriage? No f-ing way.
1.
I mean at a certain point the inevitable heart break and months of sadness and depression arn't worth chasing for a temporary high. Or the constant rejections just becomes not worth dealing with as it sours your perception of people and makes you feel like you have no value to offer.
Love is so grand and resplendent. We spend so much of our lives chasing it and we can become obsessed movies and literature that tell us where and how to find it. But rarely do realize that love is the most imperfect of emotions and that love stories take work in order to not derail. We have to be self aware enough to know that every relationship needs help. There are always signals along the way telling us when story is crumbling. Too often we opt not to pay attention.
Redditor u/TeamDodgy wanted know what signs will arise to warn that the love story is waning by asking.... What are signs a relationship is about to fail?
People Reveal The Moment They Realized They Didn't Want To Stay With Their S.O. For Life
No one would argue with you on the difficulty of relationships. Balancing your own wants and needs with your significant other's can be a tough act, but if the person is worth it in your mind, you'll find a way. When that person isn't worth it, and you're quick enough to recognize it, then you'll want out as fast as you can.
Reddit user, u/bixbygaea, wanted people to share the awful truth when they asked: