It's not just pet names or little gifts.
It's the little actions and the looks. It's the quality time. It's a swift kiss on the cheek or a perfectly cooked dinner.
There are so many ways your significant other can make you feel loved.
I have chronic pain which is exacerbated by lack of sleep, and he snores, so he sleeps in another room. But I love falling asleep with him there. So he sits in bed and reads until I fall asleep and then sneaks out quietly.
As he should.
He rings me every single time he sees a cute dog. Like every time. And will describe in detail how cute/fluffy/happy etc the dog was and if possible will also send me pictures (if he's had the chance to ask permission), because he knows how happy dogs make me. It makes my day every time.
The Little TouchGiphy
He never passes me without contact. There is always a gentle touch somewhere each time and if I pass him instead then he always reaches his hand out for me. It's incredibly comforting and loving.
That's nice of him.
Whenever I feel down he can tell and we have little therapy sessions. I don't open up about my feelings a lot and it's easier when it's just over the phone because I don't have to look at peoples faces and feel judged. We did it before we even started dating.
We're similar so he can help with a lot of my problems and when he needs it, I'm there.
A Simple Convo
Every day, he leaves work at 4.30pm and he will call me and talk to me for the whole 45 minutes it takes him to drive home, I hear him pull up outside the house and he'll say 'bye, see you in a minute' then comes in and says hi and kisses me as though we haven't just spent the last 45 minutes talking.
He's done it for ages.
I look forward to my phone ringing everyday at 4.30pm. Even after all this time.
Now THAT'S cool.
Repairs my clothes. (She's a professional tailor so these things are really easy and quick for her.) If I lose a button or there's a tear in one of my shirts or something, I'll find the button replaced or the hole repaired, even if I don't mention it to her or notice it myself.
Occasionally, when she's done something more elaborate--since she's insists I just let her do the tailoring as opposed to spending money--she'll sew a note into a hidden place in the clothing. A pair of jeans has "Hey Handsome" stitched into the inside waistband, for example.
He pays attention. If he goes to the store to pick up something he needs, he will bring back something I am out of or almost out of without my asking him to. This last time it was face wash - "I saw you were almost out so I picked some up for you" - and it was the brand and type I always use.
My boyfriend always charges my phone. I'm scatterbrained and my phone is on low battery probably at least once-twice a day, so he takes it without me saying anything and plugs it in for me.
It's so sweet.
There's no one small act for me and my SO. It's lots of little acts that show me that he loves me. It's the touch as I walk past, the glances when we watch tv or read our books, it's the times he cooks dinner even though it was my turn that night, or when he does the chores he knows I hate.
Every day I feel lucky to have found him, as every day he makes me feel loved.
Corn Corn Corn
Whenever I say, "Honey, I'm about to go *do some sort of task/activity alone* I ask, "Is there anything you need before I go?" (We have kids and they are Legion) When he doesn't have anything he needs help with, he responds, "I need you." and usually hugs me and won't let go for a bit. Corny, yes, but hey what can I say, I'm from Indiana and all I know is corn.
He writes me a little note on the bathroom mirror with a dry erase marker every single morning.
Home In Your Arms
He'll always comfort me during thunder storms. I'm not afraid of bad weather, nor have I ever been, and I don't know where he got the idea from, but the way he wraps me in a soft blanket and cuddles me in his arms is so comforting to me. I've never felt so protected and loved in my life before.
That's the best.
Listens to me about my story ideas. Remembers my character's names and comes up with randomly little funny scenes with them sometimes. Remembers their accents and personalities.
He's the only person that really has ever acknowledged and paid attention to their personalities. Sometimes he even thinks about them when he's at work. If only he knew how much it means to me!
Since we aren't able to really see each other yet, she makes me profile pictures for my birthdays. She's very sweet, she actually made my current profile pic! She's the greatest sometimes.
Up until the day he died in March, holding my hand. Even in his deepest dementia, I could hold his hand and say I love you and he'd squeeze it.
Shower & Shave
When we shower together, she'll grab my razor and shave my back while I lean against the wall under the stream. Then she'll wash my back and give me short massage. Finally, she'll wrap her arms around me, lean into my back and rest her head on my shoulder blades.
She knows I hate having a hairy back, she knows my shoulders are always tight and she knows that running water beating on my head, shoulders and back relaxes me like almost nothing else. Combine that with her holding me and I'll stay there until the hot water runs out.
Take note, other guys.
He will always get me my favorite candy bar or snack when he goes to the gas station. Even when he asks if I need anything and I say no, thanks, he will still pick it up just in case I want it for work the next day. Super sweet.
I'm almost four years sober. Whenever we're looking to treat ourselves to a night out for dinner, she always researches to make sure wherever we go has fun nonalcoholic drinks.
He always makes me a cup of coffee or tea, and when I'm sick or sad he will set me up in bed with a laptop and a hot water bottle and it makes me feel like someone is taking care of me in a way that hasn't happened since I was a little kid.
Rainbows Always Mean Love
I come home and find that all my shirts have been organized in the closet according to color, forming a rainbow-like effect (with dark colors on the left and lightest colors on the right).
Likewise, the socks drawer is arranged by color, so it's easy and convenient to find what I'm looking for.
These are little things, but very thoughtful and much appreciated.
It's the little things
I have a small glass of water that I keep on the kitchen cabinet. He always makes sure it's full. If it's empty he fills it. If it's half full he fills it. Never once have I asked him to do this. It started because I would try pouring water from the Britta pitcher while the top was full and filtering, but it's turned into the always filled glass of water.
It's such a tiny detail, but never fails to make me smile.
Shower or sleep?
He wakes me up in the morning and asks if I want to take a shower with him. Usually I do, but some mornings I just roll over and fall back asleep. He makes sure I'm covered up and kisses my forehead before he leaves for work.
Every introvert needs this.
Being my social "shield", he handles all the small talk when answering the door, in an Uber, at a party where we don't know anyone etc. I can just sit back and not come up with water cooler topics, huge relief for me.
When he's half asleep, he'll often mumble my name and tell me he loves me, or he'll reach out for me to hold me, almost like I'm his teddy bear.
Similarly, whenever he wakes up from a bad dream, the first thing he does is call out for me and look around frantically for me. It's just really sweet and genuine that I'm his first thought in those moments.
Reminds me to take my psych meds.
You & Me & All Other People
On the weekends when he wakes up in the morning, we lay in bed and he plays with my hair while we plan out our day. It may be small, but it's the only time that we aren't rushing around and have time to just enjoy each other's company. He's done this every weekend for the past 10 years. ❤️
I doubt I'll ever have a SO again, but I did get to watch my parents have little things like this. My favourite is that my dad would make my mom's favorite sandwich for her the night before so she could have it for lunch the next day at work.
He'd wrap it up and put it front and center in the fridge. He did this for almost 43 years.
He leaves tea on my nightstand and kisses me goodbye even when I'm still asleep. And on Mondays he puts an extra sugar cube in my tea to motivate me.
I sometimes find sweet notes in the morning. When I started my first job in the US I was a little nervous, and I found a note taped to my steering wheel that first morning, saying how proud he was of me and how he knew I was going to do great, etc. etc.
He makes sure that I eat everyday (recovering from an eating disorder and having multiple allergies makes it hard for me). When we go out he checks the restaurant menu beforehand to makes sure that the place has alternatives for me.
Happiness Is A Hand HoldGiphy
If we are walking around the city and about to cross the street, he grabs my hand, walks ahead and looks both ways to make sure I'm safe to enter the road. We are both grown men and it can seem a little silly, but it makes me smile every time.
You saw nothing.
I'm a coffee addict. Every time she goes grocery shopping and see a sale, she surprises me with new coffee grounds (I drink just about any coffee).
Also whenever she comes over, she'll "discreetly" put in new coffee filter in the machine for me. If she got caught, she'll exclaim "you saw nothing". So lot of time I play dumb, but it always put big smile on my face.
I dated a girl who would run her fingers through my hair while I slept. I have some childhood trauma and ptsd and that caused nightmares. By doing this she ensured once I went to sleep I didn't wake up from a night terror.
She never once complained about it, never threw it in my face. I truly miss her.
Sometimes he prepares little surprises for me in the kitchen like a homemade lemonade or just cutting up a fruit. When I try to enter the said kitchen, he screams "It's a surprise go awayyyyyy! It's the little things.
What an awesome boyfriend.
When I work mornings, he'll make me coffee and a bagel to go.
When he notices I'm having trouble walking cause of my intense foot pains he'll help me if it involves stairs or when I'm standing up.
He'll make sure my arms and such are covered when out in the sun because of my sun allergy, or stand in a way to shade me.
He's truly wonderful.
That's the best.
The ability to do our own thing and have out own time separate but together. Like she can draw, I can write or play video games, not say or do anything to each other but be completely happy together regardless.
A Little Bit Neat
I never make my bed, he is neat and organized and I'm a bit chaotic, but every time he stays over he makes my bed in the morning for me. I'll be getting ready for work in the bathroom and when I go into my room to change, I smile every time I see my perfectly made bed.
Sounds like it.
Every morning when I wake up there's a hot cup of tea next to my bed. He's awesome.
A Moment Of Solace
She runs her fingers through my hair as I lie on her chest. Between her warm and smooth skin and the head massage I get extremely calm and comfortable. My mind tends to race with one random thought after another, but when she does that, I am at peace.
He loves you too.
He goes to work very early in the morning while I sleep, and after finishing buys croissants before coming home. He wakes me up with a kiss and tells me breakfast is ready.
He makes the best ham and cheese croissants in the world. I love this man.
He asks me to dance every day. In the living room, in the driveway, in a parking lot... anywhere. We'll put on a song and just take a minute to dance. Sometimes they're slow dances but sometimes we do something silly like the Macarena hahah!
He always tells me he liked seeing me come out of my shell so by doing this it kinda makes me go out of my comfort zone. We've been together just about a year and we have so much fun doing this!
I love that he always makes sure to take a few minutes to stop and just be together. It's kind of our "pause" button.
Boop the snoop.
If he sees that I'm upset, he plays this game where it's his goal to get me to laugh or smile at least once. Usually, he can get it to work by just poking me on the nose and going "boop the snoot".
That and he ALWAYS gets me a snack at the gas station. Even if I don't ask for one.
A great relationship.
She works part-time in the afternoon, so usually I'll get up earlier than her to eat breakfast, hit the gym and take a shower.
Before I leave for work, I'll cuddle up to her and hug her. She'll always semi wake up, let out a affectionate "sigh" and call me "love."
I can feel she feels loved and loves me back, and it gets me every time.
One Step Ahead
I always tell my husband that i hate doing this, but he would help me oil my hair and condition my hair, because i don't like to do it all the time, but its really sweet of him to do that. Also he would critique my makeup and watch make up tutorials. He's just the sweetest guy.
He drives me to work every morning, and before I get out of the car he kisses me. Every morning. And if I try to get out of the car without my morning kiss, he will say "Hey, where do you think you're going?" Until I turn and kiss him. And if he's particularly needy, he'll kiss me a few times, and as I go to pull away, he'll look at me and say "one for the road?" Before kissing me again.
My husband always touches me as he passes, usually a head scratch because he knows they're my favorite. If he gets up to grab a snack he'll ask if I need anything. If I say no he'll go "not even a keeeees?" I love the way he draws out the word kiss in such a silly tone. He will act absolutely insane and ridiculous and when I ask him wtf he'll loudly proclaim "it's all for the laughs!" Because no one can make me laugh like he can.
That's kind of him.
Money is tight. Always.
My husband and I share all our money in one bank account.
But sometimes my husband gets cash in addition to his monthly salary, and my husband will hand it over to me and say "here, buy yourself something you need"
And "something I need" can be anything. A manicure, toys for our son, dinner out, etc.
A lot of people hate the idea of a husband giving his wife an allowance, and let me say that's not what this is in our case.
My husband and I don't have "extra" money, but when we do, he gives it to me and doesn't question what I spend it on.
Whenever we're together, she'll very often just stare at me with a light smile on her face while I'm doing just about anything. I can feel when she's doing it so I'll look at her and her smile will widen and I can't help but just smile back at her because her happiness and love is so contagious. We're almost two years in and it feels like we still grow closer and closer every day. I'm such a lucky woman.
Something to be proud of.
Tells me he's really proud of me when I get through grocery shopping without having a panic attack. To a healthy person it should be nothing, but to me it means the world.
Fun while it lasted.
We used to spend about 15 minutes together every morning having coffee. Looking back 9n that small about of time, quiet, and affection was one of our foundations for our relationship.
We are still close today but not in a relationship. Distance wasn't for us.
He moves uneaten food from my plate to his because I have this irrational fear of being judged for not eating everything.