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Sex Workers Share The Saddest Experience They've Had On The Job, And We're Touched

"Let me tell you about a time..."

Sex Workers Share The Saddest Experience They've Had On The Job, And We're Touched
https://www.maxpixel.net/People-Man-Guy-Crying-Dark-Hands-Shadow-Sad-2617866

Sex workers see things no one could imagine. There's no way any one person could think of it all. So, when sex workers open up a window to their side of the story, the sad side, it's critical to listen.

WARNING: Some stories are NSFW.


Reddit user, u/deviles, wanted to understand their world just a bit more when they asked:

Sex workers of reddit: What is the saddest experience (client wise) you've had while on the job?

Simply One Night Together

Not my story but I knew a girl who did "rent a night" type of stuff.

Guy asks her if she could come over. Doesn't talk about sex over the phone just if she could come over and to come hungry. She thinks he is into feeding. She arrives at like 6 p.m. pretty early for her work She asks what he would like to do. He just cooks for her. A really big delicious meal. [Later] he starts to open up a [bit.] His wife had passed and always loved his cooking, but he hates cooking for himself

The0ceanMan

The Best Kind of Life Coach?

I work as a cam girl. There are a lot of sad stories- dead wives, divorcees, etc., but the one that hit me was this guy, we'll call him Steve.

Steve sends me a message during one of my public shows asking to go private. I go private with him after the show and he just wants to talk about my life. No nudity or anything, and in privates, his cam isn't visible to me. So I sit there talking about my life for about two hours at $5/minute and he doesn't say a word. I finally run out of things to say and he is just like, "Thanks. Can I buy your Snapchat?" Of course I say yes, I give him my Snapchat, and he signs off.

The next week, I get a Snapchat from Steve asking if we can private again. I say sure, we do the same thing. He just wants me to talk about my day and random life stories for two hours. We do this once a week for about a month before he asks to Skype (where I can see him). I agree. I still know literally nothing about this person.

It's our scheduled time to Skype and he doesn't pick up the call. I Snap him to make sure everything is okay and he says he's changed his mind, he wants to do our usual thing where I can't see him. I say okay. This time, though, he types to me and I respond.

Basically, he gives me his life story. He tells me that he is an independent software developer (won't say which for privacy reasons) in Switzerland. He's never had a girlfriend and is a virgin. He's 36 years old. He has crippling social anxiety and says he hasn't spoken to a woman face to face (not even via webcam) since he graduated from college. He says that he's hideously ugly and felt overwhelming guilt for even looking at a woman because he felt that it was just unwanted and offensive to her. I tried to just listen and be understanding.

At the end of the conversation, he asked if he could turn on his cam and try to have a conversation with me. I agreed.

He turns on his cam, and he's a totally average looking guy. A bit overweight, but a handsome face and a nice haircut, clean looking. I was shocked and just really sad that he thought so lowly of himself. I told him that he was very handsome and that he shouldn't think so lowly of himself, and we just chatted about life for a few more hours that night before saying goodbye.

The next day, I get a Snapchat from Steve. He says that he felt so good about himself that he finally said hi to the front desk receptionist at work. And she said hi back and smiled. He was thrilled about this normal social interaction.

We didn't video chat again, but he snapped me every time he interacted with somebody. Last I heard, he has a girlfriend.

bunigirl2

Bridging The Gap For Normalcy

Had a client who didn't speak much English. Afterwards we were lying down together, I got out my phone and we had a conversation via Google Translate. He told me that his wife had died four months earlier and that this was the first time he'd felt normal since.

saddest_320

You Know There's A Serious Problem When Lap Dances Won't Do

I had a guy I gave a few lapdances too... his buddy took him out because he just got divorced. His wife was the one who left him. He was crying. I tried to give him a pep talk... most of the time I spent was holding him.

I obviously wasn't helping much... a stripper doesn't even come close to replacing your wife of 20 years, especially when you've never been with anyone else.

F-ck. I almost cried too.

prosperos-mistress

Let's Build An (Imaginary) Life Together

I used to be a sex cam worker, I had a regular client who always pay for private time with me. Nothing really did anything sexual for him, he wanted me to dress as a happy housewife and tell him what would be for dinner, how are the 2 dogs and cat (imaginary) doing? What were their names, he would tell me we lived in Italy, i forgot where but he described to me a large house with a pool and all. He pretty much would just fantasy play house with me. I would get really into it and he would always visit me every day.

He was just a very lonely man and seemed to crave for some human affection and interaction. I felt bad when I just dropped out of the job without warning. I do think about him from time to time, I hope he managed to live his best life.

sailor_bat_90

And Then...?

I had a few clients in my hometown & neighboring city. They were somewhat older, more career accomplished women who wanted discrete companionship.

Most of them just wanted to cuddle and talk or listen to music and lay with me. Some liked drugs, almost all of them liked wine. All of them were lonely.

One of my clients was constantly out at parties or business functions, very social & successful, and would contact me after. On Christmas one year she told me that she was previously married, her husband started her business with her before he died. She told me she lived the happiest life with him but that it was too short. I think she was looking for a similar 'replacement' for her husband but nobody lived up to the guy.

Relationships are hard and then we die.

ChillChats

A Gravespeaker

An older gentleman who wasn't a regular came in one day and would not talk to any dancers . Just simply drank , paid the bartender and left . Well after a few consecutive days of coming in he decided to let me spark up a conversation with him. He told me I was a pretty lady and such and he left . Well he came back a day later and I greeted him with the warmest greeting I could and that day he told me had cancer and he didn't have long to live .

His wife died many years ago and he told me his wife wouldn't want him moping around the house being upset or depressed and would have wanted him to remarry and go out . He just couldn't see hisself marring someone else so he decided to just stop in and see some dancers before he died . He came back maybe a week later and after that I never seen him again .

ToxicCandi

They Fulfill Any And All Desires

I used to occasionally be the safety guy in the house when a friend of mine, who was a dom at the time, would have clients in. She told me the story of this one client who turned out to be a former POW and he paid her rate and all he wanted was to be buckled or shackled onto the cross or somewhere in her space and then left alone. When he frees himself, he'll show himself out.

Easily the simplest yet most fascinating story I heard from her.

giveer

There's An Origin Story For Everything

i'm a little late to the thread but - i do online only domme stuff. this includes webcamming, fetish clips, and i used to offer skype sessions and phone sex.

i had a client buy a 30 minute skype show in which he wanted a pretty heavy rejection role play with a lot of verbal abuse. that's not unusual for the kind of clients i get, so i didn't expect anything out of the ordinary. ahead of time i asked if there were any words or subjects i should avoid that might be actually upsetting to him (some clients don't want to be insulted for their looks for example, or someone who was called a certain name as a kid might ask me not to use that word, normal stuff) and he said no, anything was fair game.

about five minutes into the thirty minute show, he started crying. my usual response to this is to not necessarily break character, but verbally have him confirm if he wants me to continue or to stop the show (in the case things go "bad" i've refunded people for their time). he said no, he's okay, and to please continue. after another couple of minutes i checked in with him again, and he decided he didn't want to continue, so i asked if he wanted to end the show and i'd refund for the unused time, but he said that he'd like to remain on cam with me for the remaining twenty or so minutes.

in the remainder of our time he told me his verbal abuse kink came from a sh-tty childhood and that his mother was verbally abusive, and that he contacted me because my voice was similar to his mother's. she'd died several months prior. i sort of didn't know how to respond to that, but he asked if instead, i could reassure him. so for a few moments i ended up speaking as his mother - not in a sexual way, but just telling him he was a good child who didn't deserve the cruel words "i" had used.

we used the entire thirty minutes. i haven't offered skype sessions in almost two years and he's never bought any content from me again but i think about him a lot. i hope he's healing.

i've always said sex work is 50% customer service, 40% therapy, and only 10% actual sex.

goddessmarina

Just Trying To Live A Normal Life

I worked in a massage parlor when I was college aged. You made ok money off the walk-ins or the guys they booked for you but the real money to be made was when a guy liked you and made you his regular. I had one client and we just clicked. He had a funny sense of humor and actually had a decent professional life going for himself.

When we started talking though it was crazy how he lacked confidence He as a bit overweight and not particularly handsome but he didn't think any girls would go for him so he visited prostitutes, massage parlors, strippers, etc. I tried to talk to some sense into him but it never worked. We even went clothes shopping, to the park, the movies and other social places just to try to help him get over his anxiety.

I didn't see him or heaar from him in a while and he showed up to tell me he had a minor heartattack. Things went downhill for him pretty quick. We chatted a few more times but he kind of pushed everyone away. I still wonder sometimes if he's doing ok.

pack123

An Escape From Reality

I once had a client whose wife had a few years prior been diagnosed with ALS. This particular client also happened to work in the field of medicine, so the realities of his wife's condition were all too real and the whole thing seemed to just hit really close to home for him.

Anyway, during our sessions he always enjoyed talking with me more so than anything else. See, I made an effort to never veer the conversation in any direction he didn't want/that would make him uncomfortable, and also to try to distract him (as that's what he had initially requested) but inevitably, naturally, we would every so often return to the subject of his home life, and his beautiful, ailing wife. I'll never forget that sort of faraway yet intense look he had in his eyes as he softly spoke of her, loving words from a shattered man.

The last time I saw him was... sometime in late 2016, but from time to time I still wonder about him.

koalaver

A Conversation To Understand The Trauma

I'm a bit too late for all of this, but here goes.

I'm a sex worker, mainly being a sugar baby for wealthy guys and sometimes I do normal escorting.

The one that I found the most sad was this man in his 50s. We met online and chatted a bit and eventually met in person at a cafe. We got along really well, I genuinely liked him. He was a very worldly, fascinating man with a terrific sense of humour. Things progressed where I came around to his house. I was expecting him to want sex, but instead we just talked the night away. That was when he told me about the tragedy in his life. His daughter had died tragically in an accident and his wife left him soon after. Their relationship just couldn't survive the trauma, I think. It's hard to describe the aching grief and loneliness that he felt. My heart broke when I saw all the emotion come bubbling up from somewhere deep inside. Despite all the trappings of wealth that he had he was a deeply unhappy man.

We laughed, we cried, we held each other, we drank too much. We became close friends and I visit him often in my own personal time. He's doing a lot better now, I'm half expecting him to get himself a girlfriend at some point. He's a beautiful man, he deserves it.

DaisyChainsForMe

Each Christmas Is Last Christmas

Made a throwaway for this cause I'm paranoid

I've done various forms of sex work over the past two years. Escorting, cam work, sugaring etc

One of my regular clients was this 50 year old English guy. Really sweet, funny and very generous. But there was one night that kinda broke my heart. He's married but, according to him, they only stayed together for their kids. Last Christmas, his family had gone back to the UK and he asked me to come over. After we had sex, he just grabbed and hugged me tight for the longest time. It was the first time he ever cuddled me and it was such an affection-hungry action.

Turns out, he lost his job and just felt so alone in his house. I stayed there, hugging him until he wanted to stop.

escort_throwaway1998

The Last Daughter's Good-Bye

Did a VIP dance where all the guy wanted was to hold me (naked) like a baby. Before leaving, he showed me a picture of his deceased daughter, who looked exactly like me.

HowardTibbsIII

Sometimes, All They Need Is An Ear

I'm a former sex worker. I booked with a middle aged client and we had a lovely coffee meeting before our date. I learned that his wife had passed away a couple of years ago and he missed human contact but wasn't ready to date anyone so he booked in with me.

Our date didn't consist of any sexual contact. He just wanted to cuddle in bed with me in our PJ'S, and talk about his wife. He had nothing but the most beautiful things to say about her. He was crying and I was crying and he just talked about true love and how he never thought he would find it, and how he doesn't know how to keep living now that he's lost it.

It was truly heartbreaking. I've never really dealt with much death in my life; I've certainly never seen someone grieving in that way. I didn't know how to comfort him so I just made tea and listened to him talk for two hours. It was strangely beautiful to know that someone can love someone else like that. I felt so bad for him and his broken heart.

DreyaNova

Simply Passing The Time Together

I used to visit a disabled client a while back, kinda young guy late 20's and wheelchair bound. I had a whole gamer thing going on because I love video games so I'd offer to play games with clients, have some naughty penalties if you lose that sort of thing for fun. Clients could bring their own games or I had a list.

I got a message from this guy and he wanted to play games, explained he wanted me to come over because he can't come to me, happy to pay the outcall rates and so on. So I visited and we played some games. He wasn't really interested in the sexy extras to it. He mostly wanted to play games and talk, cuddle etc. It continued like that each time, I'd come over and we'd watch a movie or play some games then maybe do some stuff but not always. He told me that he's lonely and has never had any experience with girls before and most friends he had abandoned him because his disability got worse and he was less active. Now the only friends he has are online in games.

I saw him regularly for about a year and a half. His mother was also aware he was seeing me and was very kind to me. She'd go out when I was there and offer me drinks and snacks. She knew what I was but felt like I made him happy so it didn't bother her. One day I stopped hearing from him, he was a regular client for over a year so I wondered what had happened. Some guys get bored and find a new girl but in this case it seemed out of character.

I went to his house just to see how he was and his mom told me that he'd had an aneurysm and passed away a week later in hospital. It was one of the most saddest experiences of my life. He was a client but I got to know him intimately over that time and he became like a close friend. I even got invited to his funeral and accepted. It was much less awkward than you might think. Everyone was really kind to me and non judgemental despite hearing what I was to him.

PingPongBoom

What Do You Say?

A paraplegic with traumatic brain injury who lay on the bed and just cried, saying he wished he was dead... how he will never have a girlfriend and has lost the will to live. What do you even say to that?

Edit: Wow, didn't expect this comment to be upvoted so much. Not sure why some people think this guy has no agency into making his own decisions about booking a sex worker.

FYI, many of my appointments actually don't involve any sex. They involve companionship. Almost all involve cuddles. A lot of sex workers are working in mental health, nursing, psychology, etc. and I assume that is because they all are essentially 'caring' professions.

I've also seen clients who suffer from PTSD, one came in to see if they could feel anything from a hug after seeing their best friend killed right next to them while deployed overseas. I've even had a mother regularly bring her autistic son because she thought it would do him some good to be with girls after he turned 20.

I think some people who have commented on posts on this thread have a really misguided notion of what sex work involves.

ouatianrtwtb

Just Another Way To Say "Good-Bye"

A husband and wife booked me for a threesome, because having a lesbian experience was on her bucket list. She'd recently recovered from a double-mastectomy and had just been diagnosed with a terminal brain tumour, despite undergoing chemotherapy. In a private (fully clothed) moment between the husband and I, he told me "she doesn't have long left..." and the way they looked at each other was so beautiful. Just pure love.

TheSpiritualSlut

H/T: Reddit

People Reveal The Weirdest Thing About Themselves

Reddit user Isitjustmedownhere asked: 'Give an example; how weird are you really?'

Let's get one thing straight: no one is normal. We're all weird in our own ways, and that is actually normal.

Of course, that doesn't mean we don't all have that one strange trait or quirk that outweighs all the other weirdness we possess.

For me, it's the fact that I'm almost 30 years old, and I still have an imaginary friend. Her name is Sarah, she has red hair and green eyes, and I strongly believe that, since I lived in India when I created her and there were no actual people with red hair around, she was based on Daphne Blake from Scooby-Doo.

I also didn't know the name Sarah when I created her, so that came later. I know she's not really there, hence the term 'imaginary friend,' but she's kind of always been around. We all have conversations in our heads; mine are with Sarah. She keeps me on task and efficient.

My mom thinks I'm crazy that I still have an imaginary friend, and writing about her like this makes me think I may actually be crazy, but I don't mind. As I said, we're all weird, and we all have that one trait that outweighs all the other weirdness.

Redditors know this all too well and are eager to share their weird traits.

It all started when Redditor Isitjustmedownhere asked:

"Give an example; how weird are you really?"

Monsters Under My Bed

"My bed doesn't touch any wall."

"Edit: I guess i should clarify im not rich."

– Practical_Eye_3600

"Gosh the monsters can get you from any angle then."

– bikergirlr7

"At first I thought this was a flex on how big your bedroom is, but then I realized you're just a psycho 😁"

– zenOFiniquity8

Can You See Why?

"I bought one of those super-powerful fans to dry a basement carpet. Afterwards, I realized that it can point straight up and that it would be amazing to use on myself post-shower. Now I squeegee my body with my hands, step out of the shower and get blasted by a wide jet of room-temp air. I barely use my towel at all. Wife thinks I'm weird."

– KingBooRadley

Remember

"In 1990 when I was 8 years old and bored on a field trip, I saw a black Oldsmobile Cutlass driving down the street on a hot day to where you could see that mirage like distortion from the heat on the road. I took a “snapshot” by blinking my eyes and told myself “I wonder how long I can remember this image” ….well."

– AquamarineCheetah

"Even before smartphones, I always take "snapshots" by blinking my eyes hoping I'll remember every detail so I can draw it when I get home. Unfortunately, I may have taken so much snapshots that I can no longer remember every detail I want to draw."

"Makes me think my "memory is full.""

– Reasonable-Pirate902

Same, Same

"I have eaten the same lunch every day for the past 4 years and I'm not bored yet."

– OhhGoood

"How f**king big was this lunch when you started?"

– notmyrealnam3

Not Sure Who Was Weirder

"Had a line cook that worked for us for 6 months never said much. My sous chef once told him with no context, "Baw wit da baw daw bang daw bang diggy diggy." The guy smiled, left, and never came back."

– Frostygrunt

Imagination

"I pace around my house for hours listening to music imagining that I have done all the things I simply lack the brain capacity to do, or in some really bizarre scenarios, I can really get immersed in these imaginations sometimes I don't know if this is some form of schizophrenia or what."

– RandomSharinganUser

"I do the same exact thing, sometimes for hours. When I was young it would be a ridiculous amount of time and many years later it’s sort of trickled off into almost nothing (almost). It’s weird but I just thought it’s how my brain processes sh*t."

– Kolkeia

If Only

"Even as an adult I still think that if you are in a car that goes over a cliff; and right as you are about to hit the ground if you jump up you can avoid the damage and will land safely. I know I'm wrong. You shut up. I'm not crying."

– ShotCompetition2593

Pet Food

"As a kid I would snack on my dog's Milkbones."

– drummerskillit

"Haha, I have a clear memory of myself doing this as well. I was around 3 y/o. Needless to say no one was supervising me."

– Isitjustmedownhere

"When I was younger, one of my responsibilities was to feed the pet fish every day. Instead, I would hide under the futon in the spare bedroom and eat the fish food."

– -GateKeep-

My Favorite Subject

"I'm autistic and have always had a thing for insects. My neurotypical best friend and I used to hang out at this local bar to talk to girls, back in the late 90s. One time he claimed that my tendency to circle conversations back to insects was hurting my game. The next time we went to that bar (with a few other friends), he turned and said sternly "No talking about bugs. Or space, or statistics or other bullsh*t but mainly no bugs." I felt like he was losing his mind over nothing."

"It was summer, the bar had its windows open. Our group hit it off with a group of young ladies, We were all chatting and having a good time. I was talking to one of these girls, my buddy was behind her facing away from me talking to a few other people."

"A cloudless sulphur flies in and lands on little thing that holds coasters."

"Cue Jordan Peele sweating gif."

"The girl notices my tension, and asks if I am looking at the leaf. "Actually, that's a lepidoptera called..." I looked at the back of my friend's head, he wasn't looking, "I mean a butterfly..." I poked it and it spread its wings the girl says "oh that's a BUG?!" and I still remember my friend turning around slowly to look at me with chastisement. The ONE thing he told me not to do."

"I was 21, and was completely not aware that I already had a rep for being an oddball. It got worse from there."

– Phormicidae

*Teeth Chatter*

"I bite ice cream sometimes."

RedditbOiiiiiiiiii

"That's how I am with popsicles. My wife shudders every single time."

monobarreller

Never Speak Of This

"I put ice in my milk."

– GTFOakaFOD

"You should keep that kind of thing to yourself. Even when asked."

– We-R-Doomed

"There's some disturbing sh*t in this thread, but this one takes the cake."

– RatonaMuffin

More Than Super Hearing

"I can hear the television while it's on mute."

– Tira13e

"What does it say to you, child?"

– Mama_Skip

Yikes!

"I put mustard on my omelettes."

– Deleted User

"Oh."

– NotCrustOr-filling

Evened Up

"Whenever I say a word and feel like I used a half of my mouth more than the other half, I have to even it out by saying the word again using the other half of my mouth more. If I don't do it correctly, that can go on forever until I feel it's ok."

"I do it silently so I don't creep people out."

– LesPaltaX

"That sounds like a symptom of OCD (I have it myself). Some people with OCD feel like certain actions have to be balanced (like counting or making sure physical movements are even). You should find a therapist who specializes in OCD, because they can help you."

– MoonlightKayla

I totally have the same need for things to be balanced! Guess I'm weird and a little OCD!

Close up face of a woman in bed, staring into the camera
Photo by Jen Theodore

Experiencing death is a fascinating and frightening idea.

Who doesn't want to know what is waiting for us on the other side?

But so many of us want to know and then come back and live a little longer.

It would be so great to be sure there is something else.

But the whole dying part is not that great, so we'll have to rely on other people's accounts.

Redditor AlaskaStiletto wanted to hear from everyone who has returned to life, so they asked:

"Redditors who have 'died' and come back to life, what did you see?"

Sensations

Happy Good Vibes GIF by Major League SoccerGiphy

"My dad's heart stopped when he had a heart attack and he had to be brought back to life. He kept the paper copy of the heart monitor which shows he flatlined. He said he felt an overwhelming sensation of peace, like nothing he had felt before."

PeachesnPain

Recovery

"I had surgical complications in 2010 that caused a great deal of blood loss. As a result, I had extremely low blood pressure and could barely stay awake. I remember feeling like I was surrounded by loved ones who had passed. They were in a circle around me and I knew they were there to guide me onwards. I told them I was not ready to go because my kids needed me and I came back."

"My nurse later said she was afraid she’d find me dead every time she came into the room."

"It took months, and blood transfusions, but I recovered."

good_golly99

Take Me Back

"Overwhelming peace and happiness. A bright airy and floating feeling. I live a very stressful life. Imagine finding out the person you have had a crush on reveals they have the same feelings for you and then you win the lotto later that day - that was the feeling I had."

"I never feared death afterward and am relieved when I hear of people dying after suffering from an illness."

rayrayrayray

Free

The Light Minnie GIF by (G)I-DLEGiphy

"I had a heart surgery with near-death experience, for me at least (well the possibility that those effects are caused by morphine is also there) I just saw black and nothing else but it was warm and I had such inner peace, its weird as I sometimes still think about it and wish this feeling of being so light and free again."

TooReDTooHigh

This is why I hate surgery.

You just never know.

Shocked

Giphy

"More of a near-death experience. I was electrocuted. I felt like I was in a deep hole looking straight up in the sky. My life flashed before me. Felt sad for my family, but I had a deep sense of peace."

Admirable_Buyer6528

The SOB

"Nursing in the ICU, we’ve had people try to die on us many times during the years, some successfully. One guy stood out to me. His heart stopped. We called a code, are working on him, and suddenly he comes to. We hadn’t vented him yet, so he was able to talk, and he started screaming, 'Don’t let them take me, don’t let them take me, they are coming,' he was scared and yelling."

"Then he yelled a little more, as we tried to calm him down, he screamed, 'No, No,' and gestured towards the end of the bed, and died again. We didn’t get him back. It was seriously creepy. We called his son to tell him the news, and the son said basically, 'Good, he was an SOB.'”

1-cupcake-at-a-time

Colors

"My sister died and said it was extremely peaceful. She said it was very loud like a train station and lots of talking and she was stuck in this area that was like a curtain with lots of beautiful colors (colors that you don’t see in real life according to her) a man told her 'He was sorry, but she had to go back as it wasn’t her time.'"

Hannah_LL7

"I had a really similar experience except I was in an endless garden with flowers that were colors I had never seen before. It was quiet and peaceful and a woman in a dress looked at me, shook her head, and just said 'Not yet.' As I was coming back, it was extremely loud, like everyone in the world was trying to talk all at once. It was all very disorienting but it changed my perspective on life!"

huntokarrr

The Fog

"I was in a gray fog with a girl who looked a lot like a young version of my grandmother (who was still alive) but dressed like a pioneer in the 1800s she didn't say anything but kept pulling me towards an opening in the wall. I kept refusing to go because I was so tired."

"I finally got tired of her nagging and went and that's when I came to. I had bled out during a c-section and my heart could not beat without blood. They had to deliver the baby and sew up the bleeders. refill me with blood before they could restart my heart so, like, at least 12 minutes gone."

Fluffy-Hotel-5184

Through the Walls

"My spouse was dead for a couple of minutes one miserable night. She maintains that she saw nothing, but only heard people talking about her like through a wall. The only thing she remembers for absolute certain was begging an ER nurse that she didn't want to die."

"She's quite alive and well today."

Hot-Refrigerator6583

Well let's all be happy to be alive.

It seems to be all we have.

Man's waist line
Santhosh Vaithiyanathan/Unsplash

Trying to lose weight is a struggle understood by many people regardless of size.

The goal of reaching a healthy weight may seem unattainable, but with diet and exercise, it can pay off through persistence and discipline.

Seeing the pounds gradually drop off can also be a great motivator and incentivize people to stay the course.

Those who've achieved their respective weight goals shared their experiences when Redditor apprenti8455 asked:

"People who lost a lot of weight, what surprises you the most now?"

Redditors didn't see these coming.

Shiver Me Timbers

"I’m always cold now!"

– Telrom_1

"I had a coworker lose over 130 pounds five or six years ago. I’ve never seen him without a jacket on since."

– r7ndom

"140 lbs lost here starting just before COVID, I feel like that little old lady that's always cold, damn this top comment was on point lmao."

– mr_remy

Drawing Concern

"I lost 100 pounds over a year and a half but since I’m old(70’s) it seems few people comment on it because (I think) they think I’m wasting away from some terminal illness."

– dee-fondy

"Congrats on the weight loss! It’s honestly a real accomplishment 🙂"

"Working in oncology, I can never comment on someone’s weight loss unless I specifically know it was on purpose, regardless of their age. I think it kind of ruffles feathers at times, but like I don’t want to congratulate someone for having cancer or something. It’s a weird place to be in."

– LizardofDeath

Unleashing Insults

"I remember when I lost the first big chunk of weight (around 50 lbs) it was like it gave some people license to talk sh*t about the 'old' me. Old coworkers, friends, made a lot of not just negative, but harsh comments about what I used to look like. One person I met after the big loss saw a picture of me prior and said, 'Wow, we wouldn’t even be friends!'”

"It wasn’t extremely common, but I was a little alarmed by some of the attention. My weight has been up and down since then, but every time I gain a little it gets me a little down thinking about those things people said."

– alanamablamaspama

Not Everything Goes After Losing Weight

"The loose skin is a bit unexpected."

– KeltarCentauri

"I haven’t experienced it myself, but surgery to remove skin takes a long time to recover. Longer than bariatric surgery and usually isn’t covered by insurance unless you have both."

– KatMagic1977

"It definitely does take a long time to recover. My Dad dropped a little over 200 pounds a few years back and decided to go through with skin removal surgery to deal with the excess. His procedure was extensive, as in he had skin taken from just about every part of his body excluding his head, and he went through hell for weeks in recovery, and he was bedridden for a lot of it."

– Jaew96

These Redditors shared their pleasantly surprising experiences.

Shopping

"I can buy clothes in any store I want."

– WaySavvyD

"When I lost weight I was dying to go find cute, smaller clothes and I really struggled. As someone who had always been restricted to one or two stores that catered to plus-sized clothing, a full mall of shops with items in my size was daunting. Too many options and not enough knowledge of brands that were good vs cheap. I usually went home pretty frustrated."

– ganache98012

No More Symptoms

"Lost about 80 pounds in the past year and a half, biggest thing that I’ve noticed that I haven’t seen mentioned on here yet is my acid reflux and heartburn are basically gone. I used to be popping tums every couple hours and now they just sit in the medicine cabinet collecting dust."

– colleennicole93

Expanding Capabilities

"I'm all for not judging people by their appearance and I recognise that there are unhealthy, unachievable beauty standards, but one thing that is undeniable is that I can just do stuff now. Just stamina and flexibility alone are worth it, appearance is tertiary at best."

– Ramblonius

People Change Their Tune

"How much nicer people are to you."

"My feet weren't 'wide' they were 'fat.'"

– LiZZygsu

"Have to agree. Lost 220 lbs, people make eye contact and hold open doors and stuff"

"And on the foot thing, I also lost a full shoe size numerically and also wear regular width now 😅"

– awholedamngarden

It's gonna take some getting used to.

Bones Everywhere

"Having bones. Collarbones, wrist bones, knee bones, hip bones, ribs. I have so many bones sticking out everywhere and it’s weird as hell."

– Princess-Pancake-97

"I noticed the shadow of my ribs the other day and it threw me, there’s a whole skeleton in here."

– bekastrange

Knee Pillow

"Right?! And they’re so … pointy! Now I get why people sleep with pillows between their legs - the knee bones laying on top of each other (side sleeper here) is weird and jarring."

– snic2030

"I lost only 40 pounds within the last year or so. I’m struggling to relate to most of these comments as I feel like I just 'slimmed down' rather than dropped a ton. But wow, the pillow between the knees at night. YES! I can relate to this. I think a lot of my weight was in my thighs. I never needed to do this up until recently."

– Strongbad23

More Mobility

"I’ve lost 100 lbs since 2020. It’s a collection of little things that surprise me. For at least 10 years I couldn’t put on socks, or tie my shoes. I couldn’t bend over and pick something up. I couldn’t climb a ladder to fix something. Simple things like that I can do now that fascinate me."

"Edit: Some additional little things are sitting in a chair with arms, sitting in a booth in a restaurant, being able to shop in a normal store AND not needing to buy the biggest size there, being able to easily wipe my butt, and looking down and being able to see my penis."

– dma1965

People making significant changes, whether for mental or physical health, can surely find a newfound perspective on life.

But they can also discover different issues they never saw coming.

That being said, overcoming any challenge in life is laudable, especially if it leads to gaining confidence and ditching insecurities.