Sex is meant to be fun. Yes it is an imperative part of the procreation process but it most certainly meant to be a time of revelry. Whether you know one another that well or not. So why not open up the experience! There is no written rule that insists sex is to stay between only two people. Sometimes the more is the merrier.... sometimes. All of our actions come with consequences, professionally and personally. Be prepared for the pandora's box you open. Two can often be the safer number and fantasy should stay fantasy.
Redditor u/CRM2018 wanted to know who was wiling to share a few saucy secrets about their love lives and it's activities by asking.... Redditors that have had a threesome and regretted it, what was the unexpected fallout?
Happy Valentines? :(
Well, I semi-regretted it. Like it was fun, but maybe I would have liked a better 3rd.
Anyway, freshman year of college I was into this guy and he had slept with this other girl in our friend group but was also into me. Valentines day we're all single, we go at it, and we have a great time. Later I end up dating the dude and like 2 or 3 years into the relationship he cheats on me with 3some girl. ooglecat
Not Cute.
GiphyIt was me, my girlfriend, and my friend. Well, ex-girlfriend now because she started dating my friend afterwords. TreGoa64
Got an unwelcome surprise......
Didn't realize the other guy was into me
Got an unwelcome surprise. grapestreet9
This is why it's really important when you do anything kink-related, even if it's supposed to just be a "vanilla" threesome, to negotiate rules beforehand. What's okay, what is definitely NOT okay. That way nobody gets unpleasant surprises.
Even when you think it's obvious, like "no you may not penetrate my anus without asking," some people may assume that it's okay. Raudskeggr
A Movie Plot.
I (f) had a threesome with my bf at the time (now my ex) and a mutual female friend of ours.
He ended up cheating on me multiple times with her afterward, and then ended up becoming obsessed with her, almost to the point of stalking. He even stole a friend's car to go see her. It was wild. Lol. chengsao
Avenger.
GiphyThe guy was built like a Superhero, so I spent most of the "experience" trying to suck my gut in.... praying for it to be over. OldmanShed
Blood is a No.
This is my time to shine.
When I was 19 I (F) was invited by a couple to participate in a threesome. They were both super hot so I was pumped!!
So it starts and everything is going fine, we're all touching each other whatever. We get into a position where I'm sitting on her face while she lays on her back and her boyfriend has sex with her missionary. All good until the boyfriend kinda shoved me off her? I was like wtf? Then she gets up and her face is absolutely COVERED in blood. Like lion after eating a zebra blood. It's literally everywhere: the sheets, the pillows, her face, his hands, you get the point.
Turns out she sliced the inside of my vagina with her very sharp acrylic nails (they looked very nice just don't feel the best against my fragile vaginal membrane) and I was bleeding profusely.
I cleaned myself off and was like....."I'm gonna go..." and they were like bye...
It's still one of my absolute favorite stories ever. Reddit
Talons.
GiphyI'm gonna cut straight to the dish....
My buddy's big toe nail grazed my butthole while trying to switch positions with her. I never told a man to cut his toenails before and hopefully never will again. ImpossibleWeirdo
Oooof.
I don't know if I regretted it per se, but I was the third wheel. After the sexcapade we passed out and later on that night her boyfriend went to the bathroom. She then cuddled up to me and said 'that was really fun and all but if we do this again can we get somebody I am attracted too.' Then her boyfriend walked back in and she realized that I wasn't him, I could literally feel the room fill up with awkwardness. Windbelow616
No Touching.
GiphyI had a threesome with two guys and it was kinda awkward seeing how they were trying not to touch each other during the whole thing. It was cool and everything but they were so trying to avoid any kind of touching and I get if two guys don't want their members to touch but they wouldn't even touch legs by accident and that is hard when you're getting dp'd by two tall guys lol. suki_ta_
Hindsight.
I mean, i guess it wasn't necessarily unexpected, but it just ruined my relationship with my girlfriend at the time. We had a threesome with a female friend of hers, and she couldn't get the image of me having sex with her friend out of her head. She said that she couldn't shake the feeling that if I truly loved her, i wouldn't have been able to sleep with someone else.
Worst part of it was my gf was essentially my dream girl, and the girl we added to the mix wasn't nearly as spectacular as she was. So i traded a longterm relationship with my dream girl for one night of a threesome, and i would NEVER have made that trade with hindsight.
That said, waking up in the morning with a hot naked girl on each side of me was pretty incredible. Buffal0_Meat
OUCH!
GiphyI had a threesome with my girlfriend and best friend. She left me for him. They have been married for over 10 years. Tacomancer42
Salty Feels....
My ex came home from the bar with his friend and asked if I would have a threesome with them. I reluctantly agreed after drinking a little. The experience was pretty good but my ex was so insecure and made my life miserable for a few weeks after that because he was salty about the fact that I actually enjoyed it. No idea what he was expecting. Viiibrations
I never talked to those morons again.
My girlfriend at the time was hanging out in her bedroom with her roommate. I was watching TV in the living room.
Her roommate comes out of the bedroom wearing a sheet. She looks at me and says, "We're having sex back here. You should join us" and drops the sheet.
She was physically attractive, but I didn't like her personality at all. I said no.
She shrugged, then went back into the bedroom. They were in there a good hour or so, when my girlfriend comes out, naked and crying. She kept apologizing for "cheating on me". I told her it was ok, I understood, everything was going to be all right.
About two weeks later she dumps me. Said she couldn't trust me BECAUSE I DIDN'T DO HER ROOMMATE.
She dumped me at my birthday party. She messed with my best friend that night in the room next to where I was sleeping, then came in afterwards to make sure I heard it and knew what was happening. She asked if I was okay, I said no, she started laughing.
We were all sleeping in a cabin in the woods and I was drunk as hell, so I walked away.
I never talked to those morons again.
I figure I got about ten miles out and passed out on the side of the road. Woke up when a couple of good ol boys tossed me in the back of their truck. They were going to drive me to the hospital, but I told them what happened and they drove me home... About two hours away. I gave them twenty bucks for gas and they turned it down. DoomOne
Cry not Pretty....
GiphyMy ex gf's friend stopped us in the middle of it to ugly cry for the rest of the night about how she wanted her ex back... needless to say it stopped pretty quick. Grt38
Back Up Kids....
I was the third for this couple, they were both really keen on me. The experience was actually pretty normal, but afterwards they kept pestering me for more. I had realized I wasn't that interested in the both of them and kept politely declining their offers. They never stopped offering, so I finally had to say I wasn't interested. I'd see one or both of them around occasionally and they'd give me a half-hearted smile. A_Sassy_Sammich
ALONE....
GiphyI had really strong feeling for this guy, and we he been flirting for a while. It was going well, and one night I was over at his house with another female friend of ours. We got drunk, one thing led to another, and we had a threesome.
Now they are dating and I'm still alone. PinkAcrobelle
"Looks like you two are good, I will leave you to it."
I was asked by my girlfriend to have a threesome with her and her best friend... a friend I had known for a long time and who had actually introduced us.
A couple of minutes into it I realized that my girlfriend was not remotely interested and had pulled back... which made it awkward because I was not remotely interested in my friend sexually... I only agreed to it because my girlfriend asked and she had been a little distant lately... I thought it might help rekindle the relationship.
I carried on and did my best to make my friend happy... and then all of a sudden my girlfriend stood up and said "Looks like you two are good, I will leave you to it."
I stopped what I was doing and asked WTF was going on, and eventually they explained that the whole thing was a scheme for my girlfriend to break up with me and "pass me over" to her best friend who apparently had a crush on me.
Needless to say this did not go down well, and I ended up losing both of them from my life. hokeyWB
Not with my Wife...
My wife and I had a threesome with a friend of mine that had recently left the military. Everything seemed fine until he told us he was in love with my wife, his brother also happened to be my best friend (we're not as close as we were though) who is super insecure and apparently also had feelings for my wife.
Later my military friend was diagnosed with schizophrenia and his delusions were telling him I was the most evil person on the planet, and that aliens were gonna give him super powers and disintegrate me (that is not an exaggeration.) He now gets monthly shots from the VA and he's doing a lot better. lemonyfreshpine
Late to this discussion.
Late to this discussion. Not exactly a one time threesome but more of a live-in crazy toy situation. So about 6ish months of threesomes and poly relationship. The dude was super sick and took meds all the time and had tons of doctors appointments. They told me he had Lymphatic cancer. This was only part of the truth.
A friend of theirs came to visit one day and saw the situation, asked me if I knew why dude was so sick and I responded "well yea, he has cancer" and I will never forget the look on friends face when he realized he would have to be the one to tell me that dude had AIDS.
I confronted dude and he lied to me. Irate, yelling and screaming at me for even thinking about accusing him. I called his wife in tears and asked her. The first words out of her mouth were, "I'm so sorry. We never meant to hurt you."
So yea. Never again. This happened 12 years ago. I was 17 at the time. I got lucky in that I didn't contract HIV. I still get tested annually and disclose that I've been exposed to it to any potential partners, but it definitely could have ended much worse. Dead_in_the_BrainPan
Don't Outdo!
GiphyI had an unplanned threesome with a close friend and her boyfriend. He's well endowed and apparently she couldn't handle giving him oral, but I didn't know that and while we were fooling around I gave it to him. Like, really good. Like so good he wouldn't stop talking about how good it was and asking why she doesn't give it like I do. It made her insecure and put a strain on our friendship as a result. Even after they broke up, my friendship with her wasn't the same. D0rkasaurusRex
A recent Redditor was curious to hear what tourists and locals alike should avoid doing in the USA, leading them to ask:
"In the United States, what should you never do?"
Stay out of the skies!
"Don't fly a drone in Washington, DC."
"The whole D.C. Area is a no fly zone."
"It's a federal offense."
"Just don't do it."- PeytonCarrK
Cops can't be bribed.
"Don't try to bribe cops when you get pulled over."
"I had some Argentinian friends immediately pull out their wallets and start pooling their cash when they got pulled over once.'
"Fortunately someone in the car noticed and told them to put it away immediately."- PeytonCarrK
"Don't pay off the police."
"My dad has friends from several third-world nations where it is common practice to give the police some cash when you are pulled over."
"However, if you try to bribe a police officer here, you'll get into a lot of trouble."- JohnASmiley
Know your rights.
"Everyone, including foreigners, has the right to be silent and have a lawyer when being questioned."
"Don’t say anything."
"Also, even if you speak English fairly well, ask for an interpreter."- WickedLilThing
Enjoy all that nature has to offer... carefully!
"Don't wander off in the national parks."
"It's very real wilderness and you can get lost and die out there."
"This includes going over railings you aren't supposed to, or off trails."
"People have died accidentally falling into a steam geyser that looked like normal water, mauled by animals or left to the elements."- AlphaOhmega
national parks GIF by Visit The USAGiphyAllow plenty of time!
"Expect consistency at TSA in airports."- WickedLilThing
Some terminology doesn't translate...
"If you’re from England, they’re called cigarettes here."- Yung_Onions
Make sure your license is up to date.
"If you come from a walkable country don’t come here expecting the same."
"There are some areas with good public transportation and bicycle/pedestrian friendly streets but for the most part, especially outside of cities, the areas are designed to accommodate cars more than anything else."
"The reason a lot of Americans drive everywhere is because, depending on where you live, we have no choice."- The_Cars93
Dog Driving GIFGiphyWait for instructions.
"Get out of your car and approach the cop when being stopped by a cop unless told to."- hildrash
Whether your'e waling down a street in a foreign country, or the street you've lived on for your entire life, it's always wise to be on guard and aware of your surroundings.
Not to mention, obey the law.
Redditor nobody-and-68-others was eager to hear the funniest "you mamma" jokes people have ever heard, leading them to ask:
"What are the best “Yo mama” jokes you got?"
Yo mamma's so fat...
"yo mamma so fat she wakes up in sections."- LolCoca
"Yo mama so fat when I had a threesome with her I never met the other guy."- 1nzlocky
Fat GIF...How fat Is she?
"Yo mama's so fat she outweighs the needs of the many."- BenefitsCustardbatch·
"Yo mama’s so fat that every time she turns around, it’s her birthday."- Amphibutter·
Yo mamma's so ugly...
'Yo mama so ugly, criminals break into her house just to close the curtains."- Cap_the_pro
"Yo mama so ugly your dad wakes up with morning wouldn't."- lukeedbnash
"Yo mama so ugly, her portraits hang themselves."- SolHalcyon
the emperors new groove hangover GIFGiphyThis could have so many meanings...
"The earth was flat until they buried yo mama."- jaymo54
Fat AND Ugly?
"Yo mama so fat, when she goes on a diet, the stock market drops."
"Yo mama so ugly, she threw a boomerang and it refused to come back."- SophisticatedOtaku
Needless to say, not all jokes are to everyone's taste.
Something to keep in mind when sharing these jokes with others.
Particularly with, "yo mamma", or anyone else's...
Reddit user itchellFamily1045 asked:
"Which show do you think you're the only person who remembers it exists?"
It was David the Gnome for me (which I found out originated in Spain and was much more popular in France than it was in the US. Apparently, I was a Euro-trash hipster as a child), but let's take a look at what got Reddit.
Classic Wheel Of Fortune
wheel through the years GIF by Wheel of FortuneGiphy"It's funny how nobody seems to remember the early seasons of Wheel of Fortune with host Chuck Woolery. You didn't win any cash. You had to choose prizes from a selection of things set up in a room-like fashion."
- opus_4_vp
"They still had the prize room with sajak for a while I believe. Camera would just pan across the room and the winner would try not to pick the stupidest things. Cause the items all had fn price tags on em and you'd only have the $ amount you won. Infuriating"
- Frosty_Shoulder_7825
"A broyhill coffee table!!"
- atlantachicago
"Always ending up with the porcelain dog statue cause it was all you had left after buying expensive items."
- captainvancouver
Eerie
"Eerie, Indiana"
- dammagedone
"I still think about the episode where everyone who stayed young, slept in Tupperware, and when their lids got taken off, aged overnight."
- CatasaurusRox
"Foreverware!"
"One of my favorite moments on the show had Marshall and Simon hanging out in Simon's room, one night. Through the walls you can hear a man and a woman laughing lecherously."
"Marshall: 'It sounds like your mom and dad are having a party'."
"Simon: 'Mom's not home'."
"It was a great weird kids' show, but some of the gags they managed to sneak in were hilarious."
- rick_blatchman
"I work w a dude whose daughter was on that show, We were just randomly chatting and he was telling me how she had done some modelling/acting when she was little"
" 'you probably dont know the show but...'."
" 'like hell i dont that show was great'."
- cyzad4
Early Edition
"Early edition- get tomorrow's newspaper today"
- cmoney1142
"I loved that show! What a concept!"
- MortLightstone
"Omg omg omg"
- TumorYaelle
"Quality 90s tv, right there. A warm-fuzzy show."
- DustBunnicula
Herman's Head
talking marge simpson GIFGiphy"Anyone remember Herman’s Head?"
- ClemofNazareth
"It had the woman that does the voice for Lisa Simpson and the woman that went on to play Ross' exwife on friends was one of the characters in his head."
- rhett342
" It has 2 Simpsons voice actors- Yeardley Smith and Hank Azaria. I seem to remember that they were offered the roles- and maybe the whole show existed? - because they didn’t want to be ‘just’ VA’s, and FOX wanted to placate them."
- mr_oof
"That’s a real show?? They reference it on 'only murders in the building'.”
- Bebosherry
"I came for this one too!"
- whitemest
The Garry Shandling Show
"The Gary Shandling Show. No, not the Larry Sanders Show - Gary Shandling Show. Even the theme song breaks the fourth wall."
- MrNegativity78
"This is the theme to Gary's show, the opening theme to Gary's show. This is the music that you hear as you watch the credits. We're almost to the part of where I start to whistle, then we'll watch It's Gary Shandling's Show."
- OGREtheTroll
"Yeah, Garry Shandling and Tracey Ullman are pretty much tied up in my memory."
- Handleton
"Best theme song EVER!"
- 2WheelFotog
"My partner LOVES the theme to that show! Plays it in the background every now and then, it's a riot!"
- FuzzyChrysalis
Wonderfalls
"Wonderfalls"
"Mid-2000s show on Fox that was apparently too weird even for Fox. I think they canceled it halfway through the 1st season."
- l8apex
"I have the DVD. Excellent show that I still toss in every once in a while."
"The producers had planned out some storylines all the way to S3. The S2 cliffhanger was supposed to be Jaye being sent to the mental hospital where she had helped put away some guest stars, including the woman who tried to kill the therapist with gift store items, and the boy who bought the russian mail order bride."
- DonnieJuniorsEmails
"Bryan Fuller's early work."
- bottledgoose
Mary Hartman Square
"Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman"
- Phuni44
"I remember watching this with my dad and my sister after the 11:00 pm news. I was in like 6th grade. That's what happens when there's no mom around. 😂"
- PJKPJT7915
"Her husband fell into a vat of paint thinner at work, and he needed to have plastic surgery over every inch of his body, so he requested to look like Tab Hunter."
- GuncleShark
"I thought her husband drowned in a bowl of soup. Maybe her first husband? That show was trippy af"
- Phuni44
"Her neighbor's husband. The clip is on YouTube."
- bitb
"Spin off of a spin off or Mary Tyler Moore as I recall, right? Wasn't Rhonda the first spinoff?"
- [Reddit]
"Not a spin-off. Mary Hartman was a very bizarre show for its time, a parody of a soap opera. Louise Lasser played Mary, and she was this weirdly detached character surrounded by crazy drama and violence. I think it might have been the first place I saw Martin Mull."
- rickpo
Terranova
"Terranova, ran for like a single season then disappeared"
- codyl0611
"I loved that show! So annoying they didn’t get a second season."
- LizHylton
"I was a young kid when it aired on TV so i dont remember much of it, but I recall it being a recurring topic with my mom every now and then"
- codyl0611
"oh god I’m old. I thought it was only a few years ago. I just looked it up and it was 11. Excuse me while I go get an AARP application."
- LizHylton
"It’s that old?! Holy sh*t, grab me an application too, please. It seriously felt like just a couple of years ago."
- KhaleesiXev
Room 222
"Room 222"
- HealthyTruck5691
"Karen Valentine was probably the cutest girl ever on a tv show. I used to love when she would be on the original Hollywood Squares."
"I'm old."
- Bartlett3313
"She was the only reason anyone watched that show."
- 7decadesofhistory
"I loved that show! My mom, my sisters and I would watch that show every Friday night. The cast was really good — Karen Valentine was a really cute and bubbly teacher, and Michael Constantine was great as the high school principal"
- CelticDaisy
Eureka’s Castle
"Eureka’s Castle"
- ofmiceandmodems
"Yes! I swear this was the first one I thought of! And Under the Umbrella Tree!"
- highmaintenancemama
"If you have the Paramount streaming app, it's on there!"
- vk2786
"Spicy, salty, sour, sweet, bring us something good to eat!"
- RoseyDove323
"I’m in my late thirties and still vividly remember the Christmas special episode where Magellan gets lost in the woods."
- doopcat
"Eureka’s Castle was the jam!"
- Vernon1031
"Euuu-reeekaas castleeee"
"*Worms going err errrr ER err ere rrr*"
- Ertuu1985
Let's talk about the shows nobody remembers but you.
Are they those early childhood favorites? Or maybe a teen-drama that only got one season before Netflix pulled it, crushing your hopes and dreams of resolved plotlines about a teenage ghost band who died of poisoned hot dogs and the incredibly talented, but heartbroken, young singer who gives them a new lease on life, love, and music?
No that is not a joke and YES I am still angry about Netflix not giving Julie and the Phantoms a second season.
Maybe it's a soap opera you think you remember watching with your mom, but maybe it was a fever dream?
Whatever it is, we want to hear about it.