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People Share The Most "Dad" Thing They've Ever Done

I'm turning into my father...

People Share The Most "Dad" Thing They've Ever Done
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Being a parent means saying things you'd never thought you would, and a lot of that depends on what you're children are doing. "Don't put clay on your pizza," and, "Stop hitting your sister in the head with an X-Box controller," are probably common phrases in most households.

It's those moments when you've become self-aware of the things you've said or done that are most critical in what kind of mom or dad you're going to be. For some people, it was exactly one moment.


Reddit user, u/TwighRussell, wanted to know specifically about self-aware dads when they asked:

What the most 'dad' thing you have ever done?

40. When You Don't Want To Miss A Thing

When my son was two, we were watching TV at the top of the stairs while he toddled. He walked over to the stair, fell, and started to go end over end down the stairs.

From the couch I leapt and grabbed him by the ankle and saved him from tumbling down stairs.

As I settled my Adrenalin-riddled heart down, I realized I had paused my show before making a leap to save my son.

superjordo

39. When You're Always Ready With A Pep Talk...Even When They're Not Your Kids

I was at a concert in a very small venue.

The opener was playing (Moses Sumney I believe) and I was right at the front. He said something like "I've never played this next song live before, so hopefully I don't f-ck it up", and I immediately replied with "just try your best", right when the whole room went quiet. He then replied back to me with "thanks, dad". Proudest moment of my fatherly career.

Capital_Event

38. When Harmless Pranks Are The Best

My daughter, Jessica, was about 12 or 13. I had left the car in the street for some reason and needed to put it back in the driveway.

So, I grab my keys and head for the door. Jessica says, "Where you going?" I say, "You want to come?" She says, "Yes."

We got out to the car, get buckled in, I pull it in the driveway and get out.

She is almost 40, I don't think she has forgiven me yet.

bigedthebad

37. When You Love Your Kids...Promise

Oh man I've recently realised I'm turning into my father. I have 2 young boys now and I swear in the last 3 years I've aged 20.

Every year when I used to ask my dad what he wanted for his birthday he'd say 'peace and bloody quiet.' Without fail.

Now I truly understand this. That's all I want too. Just please, for the love of god, give me five minutes.

I just want to sit. And stare and things. And say nothing. And not have to tidy, police or answer the same d-mn question about Iron Man or Elephants 14 times in a row.

I love my kids. I promise.

blatcher21

36. When Your Stuff Is The Most Important Thing

When my kids and their friends are playing in the basement I like to yell from the top of the stairs "HAVE FUN, BUT DON'T TOUCH MY STUFF!" For no real reason.

7281771

35. When You Find A Great "Dad-ism"

Yelled at my son that's it's not Christmas when he keeps leaving lights on in every room

fh3131

34. When You Don't Even Have Kids

I bought a new lawn mower on a Friday night, and ended up waking up early Saturday morning eager to use it. But I realized it was still early (before 7am) and didn't want to disturb my neighbors.

So I basically sat around the house for a couple hours twiddling in thumbs excitedly waiting to use my new lawn mower.

I'm 24, unmarried, and have no kids. Is it over guys?

atomiku121

33. When You Feel Good About Lying To Your Kids

Sent my daughter a "New phone, who dis?" when she texted me to pick her up at the Amtrak station.

houseofmercy

32. When The Moshing Is Just Too Close

I was at Riot Fest in Chicago a few years ago. System of A Down was playing. Friends and I purposely stood fairly far back so as to not get involved in all the moshing and thrashing.

A bunch of teenagers about 10 feet in front of me (but about 60 yards from the stage) started trying to form a mosh circle. I yelled at the top of my lungs "NO. YOU STOP THAT RIGHT NOW. IF YOU WANT TO DO THAT SH-T, GO UP TO THE FRONT OF THE STAGE."

All the other people in their 30s around me started clapping and telling them to leave as well.

It was the closest to "get off my lawn" I've ever been

illini02

31. When You Stick To Your Guns

I told my son I was going to take away his birthday if he kept forgetting to brush his teeth before bed when he was 6.

He's 9 now and every birthday I put 6 candles on his cake and we celebrate his 6th birthday, and when people ask how old he is I tell them hes 6.

Unicorncuddletime

30. This One's Rocky

We were in the Smoky mountains and were walking into a brewery. A friend pointed out the help wanted sign on the door.

I asked if I should put in an Appalachian.

morinmitchell

29. Handy

Got all mad at how much desks cost, so loaded the fiance up into the car and drove to the hardware store and steel mill.

The whole way complaining about materials costs and how big furniture was just trying to rip us off. Made my own desks god damn it. That'll show em.

Aquanauticul

28. VROOM

In Bath and Body Works I stroller raced a dad and his toddler with my nephew, we both were making engine and tire squeal noises, and sideswiping into each other like it was an epic nascar race.

We were asked to wait outside, but both kids were having a blast, and we didn't have to stay in that wretched place, so I consider it a win-win.

I'm 26.

Waldemar-Firehammer

27. Costs How Much?

I spend my days off doing yard work and refuse to pay anyone to do projects that I can figure out how to do myself. That's my dad; I have become him.

cinch123

26. Very Dad

I've started taking my rubbish out in my jocks and t shirt.

People don't wanna see my undies, they can just not look.

maxpowerAU

Its hot so I have been just wearing my shorts for months. When the kid is around I keep my underpants on but when she isn't I freeball it. This includes taking out the trash and doing jumprope in the backyard.

babyspacewolf

25. "Don't Swear, Don't Fall"

While carrying the child, stub my toe to a point where I'm not sure if it's broken or bleeding horribly, because I have to first find a safe place to put him down gently/carefully, before I can collapse to the floor and writhe around, in agony.

liquorlanche

24. If It Works...

When my kids talk back to me I ask them if they think they are talking to one of their street friends.

I still don't know what it means and it was said to me all through my childhood.

InfoSecPeezy

God you are the worst.

Theycallmetheherald

To me it sounds like you're trying to be intimidating like hey I'm the Don not some lowly street thug

DeadpoolLuvsDeath

23. Inspiring

Told a joke and kept it going for more than a year.

calkel2

I have one that's been going for probably 6-7 years now. Whenever the dog comes back inside during the summer I make some comment about him being a hotdog.

whattocallmyself

Stay strong brother! Commitment is key!

calkel2

22. Call It Reading

I watch TV with the closed captions on, I am not hearing impaired.

UbaGob

I'm not even 20 and I do this.

Local_Scrub

This is Dad behavior? My fiance speaks English as a second language so we've been putting cc on for 6 years now and I lose my mind when I go to the movies or a friends house and there is no cc.

It also ruins the plot often since I can always read the entire scenes dialogue before it happens. I love it.

mudvayneWTM

21. Ah The Floating Money Pit

As a single mother, I bought a small fishing boat for my 14 year old son to use and together, we learned how to fish.

Stabfacenotback

Two greatest days of a boat-owner: The day you buy your boat, and the day you sell your boat.

Macluawn

Most people don't realize that boat is an acronym. It stands for Break Out Another Thousand.

semicolon7645

20. Star Using Numbers

Keep calling my daughters by each other's name.... they actually made labels for themselves yesterday to help me out.

Wishuponareddit

My sister used to do this with her kids and I thought it was weird. Now I have 3 boys and do it constantly, often using the two wrong names first.

mooncricket18

19. Friend-Scolding

Internet friend sent me a picture of her boobs, I lectured her on the dangers of sending strangers (we had never met IRL) nudes, especially with your face visible in them.

Zerole00

How many points does he need?

She sent him her boobs.

Kid_Monotone

18. It's All The Rage Now

Having a dadbod.

khassius

dadbod

I want to petition to rename the "dadbod" to "fatherfigure."

Original_name18

17. Appropriately Tacky

Wearing a chef's hat while cooking on the grill.

Back2Bach

I do this. Mine say, "May the Fork be with you."

BonzaiBananas

16. Playing Horsey

Crawl on my hand and knees with three kids on my back.

meta_uprising

I think this is what caused my dad's back problems

abe_the_babe_

I think this is what caused my back problems

I've had to ban that game after one started to run and jump on my back.

smittyphi

15. Of Course, This Is Mandatory

Moved into a new apartment with my fiancee recently. We were hanging up pictures, and I did the classic - use the stud finder on myself bit. :)

Outrageous_Claims

My husband's been doing this since we met... 6 years ago

The stud finder has about 50/50 accuracy

ShuuString

14. That's Some Skill

Once I caught puke in my hand and did not loose a drop in the middle of a Red Lobster.

mrgeef

13. Who Wearts Short Shorts?

Actually the moment I felt like my brother was full dad mode (even though he had a kid for a year at that point) was during his daughter's one year birthday party.

I hadn't seen him in a while and I notice his shorts have gotten shorter, and for a guy that used to be so on point fashion wise, just overall everything he's wearing is really... unrefined.

I'm just standing there and I notice him discreetly whip out a small camcorder as the birthday candles are being lit, and squats down to get a good angle.

Mista_Madridista

12. Welcome Home, Dad

Took two tries to get off the couch, grabbed a beer, walked back to the couch and sat down. Scratched my balls. Then neglected my family for 20 years.

Economy_Cactus

Good news is that by the time you get back with your smokes, I'll be able to buy you the next pack!

Dooky710

11. The Last Vestiges Of Smart TV

Might be more of a grandad thing, but I watch Jeopardy every night at 7:30.

ElwoodCash

I complained at work because they would be working me later from now on. They thought I was complaining because I'd just be working late but I was really just upset that I'd have to miss Jeopardy from now on.

C_Bowick

10. Work That Body

In Bath and Body Works I stroller raced a dad and his toddler with my nephew, we both were making engine and tire squeal noises, and sideswiping into each other like it was an epic nNscar race.

We were asked to wait outside, but both kids were having a blast, and we didn't have to stay in that wretched place, so I consider it a win-win.

I'm 26.

Waldemar_Firehammer

9. Such Sacrifice

Just happened last night. Was taking a dump when my wife yelled that our toddler was blowing out of his diaper (for those of you who don't know that term, it means poop was leaking out of his diaper).

I stopped myself mid-shit, shoved a piece of toilet paper over my b-hole to prevent skid marks, and gave my kid a bath, got him in a clean diaper and pajamas, and helped read him a bedtime story before returning to the bathroom to complete my personal previously interrupted foray into defecation.

yesithurt

In my house, bathroom time is a timeout from parenthood. The wife and I have taken progressively longer bathroom breaks over the last few years.

Admin5668

8. Sandy Fun In The Sun

Taking your child to the beach for the first time is the most 'dad' thing a man can possibly do. It requires 60-90 minutes of preparation including assembling supplies and loading the vehicle. (Bonus points if you get up early and drop the car off to get a "good space").

Once you have coordinated the nap schedule and found the window of opportunity you traverse to the beach. Looking at 10-15 minutes of unloading with multiple trips possible.

All of the items brought are intended to stimulate the child and allow the family to get cute pictures. Once the kid gets cranky then its time to repack the stuff and load up the car so the kid can take a nap inside while you have wasted an entire beach day for roughly 25 minutes of sun.

That is when you know a man has crossed the Rubicon and become a dad.

15careCrowBoatfan

7. Oops

Once put my foot in the way to try and stop my two year old daughter running into our dining room table. Ended up kicking her square on the nose.

DrJad

6. Just Skip The Babysitting

Went to Capriottis for lunch. Girl behind the counter is cute as hell...she is super flirty. I go back about a week later, half because she's cute and seems into me.

I order my sandwich and as she's taking my order she caresses my hand and says that I have really nice hands. I'm definitely flattered but also a little taken back because damn! This never happens to me!

While I'm waiting for my order, she writes her number down on a receipt and hands it to me with my sandwich. I waited a couple days and then texted her.

We chatted a bit and then it comes out that she's 17-years-old. I basically scolded her and told her she don't need to be handing men her number like that at 17-years-old.

KMFDM781

5. Bro Dad

Went to a little get together party at a friends house with a few people I knew. I was the first one there so I had to cut some wood and get the fire started all while drinking a cold one.

After that pointed out the motorcycle sitting behind us to my buddy and asked why he hasn't been riding it. He claimed it wasn't running so I took a look at it for sh*ts and giggles.

Smelled gas when he turned it over so I checked the fuel lines and saw one was diconnected. Reconnected tried again but still didn't start but almost. Pushed it down the hill and bump started it and rode it down the street.

I cut the wood, made the fire, drank the beer and fixed the motorcycle. I was dad.

f22raptor272

4. Lounging Like A Man

There's a pic of me reclined on a couch balancing a beer on my gut and gazing into the distance and I've never felt more like a dad than I do when I see that pic. I'm a lady.

NekoGoblikon

3. Male Head Of Household

A buddy of mine was going through some rough times and living on my couch while getting back on his feet. After a few weeks of seeing him play videogames in his underwear I got pissed.

I knew I had to talk with him, but I didn't feel like it was my place or even had the courage to tell him half of the things I wanted to.

SO I figured it would be easier if I was drunk. So I got a six pack of beer. After chugging one I walked into the house, slammed the beer on the coffee table, and calmly said "Turn off the game. We need to talk."

And if that's not dad enough for you here's a list of bullet points we covered in our talk:

  1. Personal responsibility
  2. work ethic
  3. consequences
  4. "I'm telling you this not to get on you, but because I love you and want to see you succeed."
  5. resume writing
  6. I think we talked about credit scores for some reason
  7. preparing for the future

He didn't turn that PS4 on until he got a job a week later; found a second job the next month, and moved into his own 1B1B not too long after. This was a couple years ago and I've moved since. I hope he's doing okay.

codycantdie

2. Approaching Peak Dad Behavior

Socks with sandals.

MrShredder5002

Someone get this man a fanny pack.

Lucifer-Prime

With cargo shorts?

Harold76

I was dressed as a dad so that was mandatory.

MrShredder5002

1. Definitive Dadness

Sold 2 semi-desirable old European cars for a Honda Odyssey and didn't completely hate it.

Taco_air_is_heavy

H/T: Reddit

Infamous Internet Rumors That Ended Up Being True

Reddit user strakerak asked: 'What started out as an internet rumor that ended up being infamously true?'

boy playing at laptop inside room
Photo by Ludovic Toinel on Unsplash

In 2017, I returned to my office after my lunch break to hear my supervisors discussing Tom Petty. This seemed like a random topic to me until one of my supervisors told me Tom Petty had passed away. He was a huge fan of Petty and spent the next hour or so combing through the internet to get more information.

He came back into the room my other supervisor and I were working in and announced that Tom Petty wasn't dead after all. News outlets had jumped the gun to announce his death, but he was actually still alive.

The next day, I came in to find out that Tom Petty was dead; the news may have been premature, but true.

This is a classic example of the rumor being started on the internet. Sometimes, like with the news of Tom Petty's death, the rumor can run wild and appear everywhere. Other times, the rumor can be seen by just a few people and dismissed. However, a lot of times, these rumors turn out to be true.

Redditors know a lot of internet rumors that turned out to be true, and are eager to share.

It all started when Redditor strakerak asked:

"What started out as an internet rumor that ended up being infamously true?"

The King Of Pop

"Michael Jackson writing the music for Sonic 3."

"He actually did, but was never credited on the game because it would breach his contract with his record label."

– -WigglyLine-

"He did the same when he appeared on The Simpsons. He appeared under a pseudonym, and the Producers said it was an impersonator."

"Only years later they confirmed it really was Michael."

"His singing voice was actually done by an impersonator, though."

– given2fly_

The Truth Comes Out

"In 1998, US Men’s National Team captain John Harkes was shockingly cut from the team right before the World Cup. The coach claimed it was because Harkes wouldn’t fit into his new preferred formation, but rumors flew on the early internet that it was actually because he had slept with his teammate Eric Wynalda’s wife. The rumor was so well-known in soccer circles that Harkes expressly denied it in his autobiography the next year."

"Fast forward 12 years to 2010 and Wynalda admits it’s true. The coach then came out and admitted it was why he dropped Harkes, but that he’d planned to keep the secret as long as Wynalda did."

– guyfromsoccer

Video Evidence

"The Tim Burton Hansel and Gretel that aired once on halloween in the 80's."

"I heard for years that it was fake but I knew it was real because my dad recorded everything in the 80s and he recorded that. We let a good friend of ours borrow it and switch it over from VHS to DVD and soon after that it made its way on to the internet , and there it is now. I know it's our copy because the tracking in the beginning is screwed up. Still have the VHS."

– Frozenthickness

"There was a similar story with a Nickelodeon movie called Cry Baby Lane. It was supposed to be so scary that Nickelodeon got complaints and denied its existence for years. Someone uploaded a taped copy to youtube about a decade ago."

– PattiAllen

The Movie Business

"That North Korea hacked Sony Pictures because of The Interview movie."

"I worked in the movie business at the time and the account managers at Sony all basically needed to get new identities as all of their personal information got leaked online."

OldMastodon5363

"My partner worked on that movie and the production bought all the crew 1 year of an identity theft tracking service."

CMV_Viremia

Keep Away From The Ears Of Kids

"Some banned episodes or scenes of cartoons."

"For example, I remember there was a Dexter’s Lab cartoon where he clones evil versions of DeDe and himself and they swear like every other word (censored of course), and people debated whether it even existed cause they only aired it like once. Now it’s pretty accessible online."

– Spledidlife

Yes, It's True

"Echelon, a massive electronic espionage system by the US and allies to intercept all electronic messages, especially emails."

"In the mid-nineties it was a topic on conspiracy BBS boards. A lot of people in my bubble at the time (mainly uni students in Europe) were including fake threats to the US in the their email signatures as a way to "protest" and "fill the system with false alarms" (obviously useless)."

"Then, in 1999-2000 came out to be true and a lot of security service agencies from UK and other US allies started to admit they were part of the espionage network."

– latflickr

How The Mighty Fell

"John Edward’s love child."

– ACam574

"A reminder that he was cheating on his wife while she was hospitalized for cancer treatment."

– Fanclock314

Ugh...

"Carrie Fisher's heart attack. Some a**hole who was on the same flight was livetweeting the whole medical emergency and justified it by insisting she was just making sure the family was informed."

– everylastlight

It Actually Happened

"Every year around her birthday there was a rumor that Betty White died. When I heard she died, I scoffed, saying that dumb rumor is back.... then saw it on the news. I was in shock."

– Known-Committee8679

"The fact that Betty died literally right before she turned 100 is such a Betty White way to go out."

– Paganigsegg

Big Actor, Small Roles

"I distinctly remember some rumors about the reason why Bruce Willis was taking so many roles in sh*tty movies before it was announced he has dementia."

– KampferMann

"RedLetterMedia did a deep dive on his recent movie activity to try and work out why exactly he was taking part in basically scam-movies. They noticed he had an earpiece in one of the scenes and joked that the director was feeding him lines. I remember they even disclaimed over the rumours at the time, and possible made a follow-up vid when it was revealed to the public."

– CardinalCreepia

What To Do Next?

"That the writer of LOST were making it up as they went."

"Turned out to be absolutely true."

– homarjr

That last one was kind of obvious!

Do you have any to add? Let us know in the comment below.

Person holding large stack of books
Photo by Jay Lamm on Unsplash

Whether you're naturally interested in fun facts and trivia or not, it's always nice to know a few that you can pull out of your pocket at a moment's notice as a nice conversation starter.

But there are some fun facts out there that are so weird, people become more preoccupied with how the teller found out that information rather than the information itself.

Redditor Dry_Bus_935 asked:

"What is your 'don't ask me how I know' random fact?"

Nuclear Fail Safe

"You have quite a lot of time, certainly more than ten seconds, to turn back on the main pumps of a nuclear reactor once you have accidentally turned them off."

- egorf

"I'm not surprised. The amount of fail safes, redundancies, and emergency scenario planning for nuclear power plants is insane."

"I toured a nuclear plant and wrote my high school senior thesis on the plans put in place to ensure the Fukushima disaster would not happen at that plant."

"I'm sure the secondary pumps are plenty capable of handling the reactor until the main pumps are repaired or just turned back on."

- Borderlandsman

Happy Cat

"If your cat chews on fresh eucalyptus, they might start hallucinating and fall over repeatedly, leading to a $400 emergency vet bill just to be told she’s just kinda high."

- oddidealstronghold

"And, that's part of why koalas love it. Little stoners."

- littlebluefoxy

Archaeology: Do Not Lick

"Old human bones are very porous, so if you lick them, they’ll stick to your tongue."

- clanculcarius

Sharing is Caring

"A pigeon will only eat a Starburst if you chew it up a little bit first. Just to clarify: chew the Starburst, not the pigeon."

- OhTheHueManatee

"Instructions unclear. Pigeon unhappy."

- Wild-Lychee-3312

Intriguing Anatomy

"Everyone is here with the creepy crime stuff, and I'm just like, 'A soft fur rat has 22 nipples.'"

- horroscoblue

"Okay, so either they have really small nipples, their nipples overlap, or they have nipples in places where there shouldn't be nipples."

"(I've never written the word 'nipples' so many times in a singular sentence before.)"

- GdeGraaf

'Don't Ask Me,' Indeed!

"Turmeric can be used as clothes dye. It is capable of permanently dyeing cotton cloth even after it has passed through the digestive tract of an adult male."

- SlefeMcDichael

"You s**t your pants, didn't you?"

- PMmecrossstitch

"I'd prefer not to answer that question."

- SlefeMcDichael

High-Risk Survival Skills

"If you ever trying to survive in the Arctic, don’t eat polar bear liver. It is so high in vitamin A, it will kill you."

- WrongWayCorrigan-361

"It's also surrounded by a lethal amount of angry polar bear."

- horanc2

Real-Life Spies

"TV shows and movies go out of their way to make military/intelligence officers look bada**."

"But real-life 'spies,' by design and training, are boring. They have regular houses and standard second-hand cars, they dress down, and they have vague, boring job titles (accounts receivable) as cover, and they do not draw attention to themselves. Most come from specialized academia."

- Ok_Worth_1093

Haunting Reality

"Your muscles can keep twitching for several hours after you die."

- JustDave62

"Also, beards can appear to grow. This is however not because the beard itself grows but because the skin shrinks."

- RRautamaa

"I worked at a morgue for over eight years. If you grasp the hand of a dead body to move the arm, the hand will grasp back, but that's just muscles and tendons reacting to the tension."

- goneferalinid

The Sneakiness of Drowning

"When a drowning victim is revived, get them to a hospital as soon as possible. Drowning is the leading cause of death of kids from the age of one to seven and is ruled as accidental drowning when it comes to secondary drowning or dry drowning."

"Basically, your lungs are full of water despite being revived. Your lungs will absorb the liquid, but not before your body acidifies from high levels of carbon dioxide. The only chance to survive is to have the lungs pumped with oxygen via CPAP machine and time."

"Also, drowning is extremely quiet. You don’t hear the victim go under. And if you see flailing, do not attempt to save the victim otherwise you’ll become another drowning victim. Throw them a lifeline and hope their amygdala realizes that a rope or something is floating near them and grabs on it."

- Dfiggsmeister

Not Everyone's Favorite Chocolate

"Hershey’s chocolate has the strong smell of vomit or feces to some people (me), and that’s because they use butyric acid as a preservative. Butyric acid is the compound that makes vomit smell so bad."

"Edit: Digging further into it, there are some claims that they may not be “adding” the butyric acid, but rather it is occurring from essentially spoiling the milk in their milk chocolate. Either way, the butyric acid and putrid smell remains a part of their product."

- hefewiseman1

"That explains the weird aftertaste I always get! I don’t smell it but their chocolate always has this super unpleasant sharp/acidic aftertaste that I find repulsive. I assume this is why!!"

- PomegranateNo975

Do Not Lick the Asbestos

"Asbestos tastes like chalk. And if you lick it, it has the texture of extremely gritty sandpaper. Which is actually the feeling of microscopic asbestos needles piercing your flesh!"

- TooYoungToBeThisOld1

Mapping Out the War

"Beginning in 1911 in anticipation of the outbreak of WW1 in 1914, two statesmen, one from England and one from France, began visiting locations in France that they believed would be the settings for a number of major battles that would occur during the great war."

"Long bike rides through these future battle zones in the countryside and weeks spent building a foundation for a French-Anglo codebook that would later prove important in helping win the war."

- fjordperfect123

Avoiding Lawsuits > Protecting Patients

"Doctors, or surgeons more specifically, that make too many mistakes during surgery, ie, leaving instruments in patients, frequently gets ‘quietly traded’ to other hospitals where they continue their path of destruction with the patients not being aware of their past record. Hospitals tend to keep quiet about the matter to avoid lawsuits."

- Kittytigris

Bonus Points: Do This While Having Lunch in Your Car

"If you overfill a fast food gravy cup and then put a lid on, it will create a pressurized gravy stream that sprays all over your face and uniform while your coworker looks on in horror."

- thechaosjester776

This subReddit thread was so a roller-coaster of random facts, we've surely all walked away learning something.

But the biggest takeaway might just be: Maybe don't lick so many things.

Shocked woman covering her mouth
vaitheeswaran Nataraj/Unsplash

When we're intoxicated, or even the slightest bit tipsy from having a little too much to drink, our immediate perspective on things is hazy.

But there's nothing like a bit of alarming news or a jarring incident to snap us out of the fog and focus on the moment.

Sometimes alcohol isn't always to blame for our impairment.

It can be a state of mind, like a perpetual numbness from being complacent in life, and all it takes is one shocking moment to rattle us back to our senses.

Curious to hear from strangers online about this type of scenario, Redditor Known_Challenge_7150 asked:

"What’s one thing that sobered you up real quick?"

These individuals were witness to shocking events that sobered them up right quick.

Bleeding Out

"Got out of a taxi and found a naked man profusely bleeding from his head crawling up the driveway in my condo. Called him an ambulance completely forgot I was absolutely wasted until 45 minutes later when I'd helped him translate and in to an amublance and stepped in my front door."

"Later a few days later learned he'd slipped in the tub and literally crawled out for help. Poor dude. He was fine but I genuinely thought he was going to die there."

– DongLaiCha

Tragic News

"At a bachelor party and we got a phone call that the groom’s father had suddenly passed."

– accountnameredacted

Bottom Of The Barrel

"I went to visit my parents back in July. I was homeless and deep into fentanyl addiction so I lost a lot of weight. My folks could see it. They knew something was up. Anyway, I spent the night and I was getting ready to leave in the morning and I looked at myself in the mirror for a good long time. I finally had enough and told them everything. They took me to detox, from there I went to rehab. Graduated in August and been living with them ever since then. I have 160 days clean and sober."

– Crotch-Monster

A reality check can be enough for some people to snap out of it.

Like Father, Like Son

"Was driving a drunk friend home, he had been on a bender again and was smart enough to call me for a lift rather than try and drive. As I helped in to his house his mother came down the stairs and said 'your as drunk as your father' and went back upstairs. I haven't seen him drunk since then, he still drinks but the thought of turning into his dad scared him out of hard drinking."

– psycospaz

Busted

"Flashing blue lights."

– FiddleOfGold

"This sobered me up just thinking about it."

– redmaple_syrup

Losing Sight

"Woke up to no sight in one eye. I had cataract surgery so just thought one of the lenses had slipped and it was an easy fix. Eye doc says nope, you had a stroke. I loved soy sauce, teriyaki sauce and salty food, which caused high blood pressure, which caused retina damage. Over six months was able to get most of my eyesight back with medication, and all back within a year. Trying to navigate life with one eye was very sobering. Started taking HBP much more seriously."

– MissHibernia

Quitting The Bottle

"Looked up someone I went to highschool with who was an awesome guy. Found out he had been dead for 3 years from alcoholism, at age 33. I made an overnight change. I hadn't started drinking that night yet, 10 months ago. Haven't touched it again since."

– omgtater

These disturbing moments were enough for Redditors to immediately come to their senses.

Unplanned House Guests

"Me and a buddy Woke up in someone’s living room, realized neither one of us knew the people, they were just nice and let 2 drunk guys sleep on their living room floor. We didn’t even say goodbye."

– Oneinsevenbillion75

Serious Health Warning

"Elevated liver enzymes."

"And the knowledge that this sh** was gonna kill me and I just couldn't orphan my family over it."

"So I opted for recovery, instead."

"Clean and sober since June 5, 2009."

– Far_Meal8674

The Joyride

"Grew up in a rural area. The little town hosted dances at the hockey arena, everyone (adults and kids) went and they overserved everyone, regardless of age. I was maybe 16 or 17 and was absolutely sh*tfaced, and jumped in the back of someone's truck with about 8 other people to go back to someone's cottage for after dance drinking. The driver (still don't know who it was) started racing one of his buddies and we whipped around small dirt roads, flying around blind corners on the wrong side of the road, going god knows how fast. It was basically a disaster waiting to happen. It was crazy scary and I was sober and thankful to be alive when we finally arrived."

– foxfood9116

The human psyche is a fascinating thing, isn't it?

How we can automatically focus on something urgent at a crucial time, even after getting buzzed from drinking too much alcohol.

But as we're in the thick of the holidays, it's a good reminder to drink responsibly and stay off the roads if you drive to your celebratory destination.

Cheers. Stay safe. And happy holidays.

Woman holding multiple shopping bags
Photo by freestocks on Unsplash

We've all complained or vented about something in our lives which, in the grand scheme of things, wasn't exactly a problem, or is very easily solved.

Then there are those who complain about things that others almost hope will happen to them at some point in their lives.

These are known as "first world problems", as they are problems that pretty much only the world's one percent faces.

From having to fly business class instead of first class, or being served Roederer instead of Dom Pérignon, these complaints are often met with amusement, bewilderment, or even anger.

Redditor jennimackenzie was curious to hear the most absurd "first world problems" anyone ever complained about, leading them to ask:

"What’s the most ridiculous 'first world problem' you’ve seen people get worked up over?"

"Tale As Old As Time..."

"I once knew a mom who was legitimately devastated, to the point of tears/grief, because a doctor predicted her 8 year old daughter's final height to be around 5'2","

"Which wasn't tall enough to get cast as Belle at Disney World."

"That was the child's (and her mother's) only dream in life, apparently."

"Didn't appreciate my suggestion that she could be Minnie or Mickey."

"Lol!"

"Only a face character would do!"- TravelLovingMom

"Must Be Funny, In A Rich Man's World..."

"My boss from about a decade ago was this insanely rich dude who always went to the bank to get fresh and crisp currency."

"He'd call the bank in advance to make sure they had some on hand."

"I think he was a germaphobe."

"He had a trash can that he'd throw $1 and $5 bills in that he thought was 'dirty' and regularly just donated it vs spending it."

"I asked him why he did this and he said it was too much trouble and asked if I wanted it."

"I said f*ck yeah dumped it into my bag and when I got home it was close to $400 in singles and fives.

"Another time, he wanted to upgrade all the computers in his studio, so we went to a store and bought 10 PCs."

"They all had $150 mail in rebates and he wasn't bothered to go through the trouble of mailing them in."

"3 weeks later I received $1500 after spending a whole afternoon filling out all those goddamn forms."- azninvasion2000

Money Burn GIF by nog Giphy

Who Wore It Better?

"When I was about 19 years old, I was at my boyfriends family BBQ."

"I was wearing this pretty floral sundress."

"His cousins girlfriend showed up in the same dress and she was SO mad that she went and changed."

"I will never understand being upset when someone is wearing the same thing as you.'

"Did you really think that your shirt you bought off the rack is going to be unique to you?"

"No."- mertsey627

Seeing Red! Or Blue In This Case...

"The blue of the balloons wasn't quite the same as the bridesmaid's sashes."

"Years ago my wife and I attended a wedding."

"It was very low key."

"The dinner was in the dining hall at the university where the couple met, cinder block walls and all."

"It was a Baptist wedding - no booze and very serious."

"The dark blue balloons attempting to liven up the hall were a slightly darker shade of blue than the sashes on the bridesmaid's dresses."

"The bride lost here sh*t and absolutely raved for nearly an hour."

"I can't remember how they finally managed to talk her down."- mechant_papa

south park wedding GIF Giphy

See You In Court!

"Rich neighbors who end up in expensive court battles because they disagree about where a tree can be planted or whether the color of a fence fits in with the street’s 'amenity'."

'These disputes get really heated and rack up huge lawyers’ bills."

"The most pathetic part is after the judgement when they are arguing about who should pay the other party’s costs."

"Lots of affidavits filed citing the 'emotional distress' they had to endure, or painting themselves as brave warriors who were forced to take a stand to fight for 'justice'."

"Also lots of pompous litigants insisting that the judge refer to them by their 'Dr' title."

"An absolutely insane dumpster fire of entitled rich people problems."- ElectrocRaisin

It's Always People With Money Who Don't Want To Pay!

"I work in a public library."

"People will get so so mad if they have to be put on a wait list for a book."

"A popular book that just came out."

"Ok our services are not only free but so are the books."

"You’re welcome, a**holes."- Switchbladekitten

A Warm Butt Is A Happy Butt!

"My own."

"We have a bidet toilet seat (Fabulous! Everyone should have one!) and not only does it wash your bum and blow dry it, but the seat's heated!"

"It's shocking how much a heated toilet seat makes the whole process more agreeable."

"Except: We had a power outage and I went to use the toilet and the seat was cold!"

"Unacceptable!"

"This shall not stand!"

"I was really upset because it didn't feel good."

"Then I stopped and thought: This is the most first-world problem anyone's ever had."

"I was really pissed because my heiny was tepid."

"I got over it."- DeathGrover

homer simpson episode 23 GIF Giphy

Holy Matrimony!

"Weddings are a gold mine for this question."

"People get so hyped up over their 'most important day of their life'."

"They'll destroy friendships, go into debt, and have crazy expectations."

"It's not always the couple who go crazy, either."

"Sometimes, it's the parents or another family member who feels entitled to control the wedding."

"It's just a party."

"Be considerate of guests, have plenty of food and drinks, and enjoy it."- magicrowantree

When Fast Food Isn't Fast Enough...

"Having to pull off to the side to wait for a drive-thru order to be brought out to you because your food isn't ready and there's a line building up behind you."- demanbmore

In Case You Don't Think Customer Service Employees Are Undervalued...

"I was working the return desk at a Target next to a military base so I have so many stories."

"One of my favorites was a lady who had her baby shower before revealing the gender and was livid that she had received floral newborn diapers when she’s having a boy."

"It was a huge box of super expensive, all organic diapers, that we didn’t carry and therefore could not return."

"I cannot accurately express her fury and disgust."

"How dare either suggest her boy could wear feminine diapers."

"I suggested she donate them if she didn’t want to use them and she instead threw away the entire box."

"When she left we pulled it out and threw it in our donate bin."

"There have also been multiple times where mom’s order massive toys and when we bring them out to the car they get furious that they aren’t wrapped."

"We don’t offer wrapping services."

"Here’s the thing, if you don’t want your kids to see the toys you got them for Christmas or their bit to day DON'T BRING THE CHILD WHEN YOU PICK IT UP."

'I’ve had multiple women scream and curse me out that I had ruined their kids Christmas by bringing the toys they ordered out to the car like they requested."- clever-mermaid-mae

Customer Service Waiting GIF by Juno Calypso Giphy

Happiest Place On Earth!

"I used to work for Disney."

"That in itself should tell you everything."

"However for fun I'll give you two specific stories one form our tech department and one from my wife who worked bookings."

"I specifically worked for their call center to help with technical issues with magic band and the website."

"Suddenly got worse huh?"

"A right of passage call everyone has at least one story of is the 'Dome call'."

"Basically there is a subset of Disney Guest (TM) that believes if it rains at Walt Disney world there is someone that will push a button to encapsulate the whole of Disney property in a dome to keep out the rain."

"I'm not kidding."

"If this button is not pushed they call our tech department to angrily ask why."

"My wife worked booking."

"Pretty much everything including Bibbidi Bobbidi boutique and Pirate's league."

"These two things did roughly the same thing difference being price and theme."

"BBB was expensive did more and was focused on princesses, pirates league did a bit less and focused on mermaids and pirates."

"Lady called up my wife, and got pissed about BBB being booked up (It goes FAAAAST)."

"Karen: 'Im going to give the phone to my daughter and I want you to tell her how you are ruining her vacation by not letting her do BBB'."

"Wife proceeds to explain how pirate's league is so much cooler and how she can be a mermaid or pirate and basically gets the kid to start demanding to their parents about how they want to be a mermaid instead of a princess."- trollsong

Disney World GIF Giphy

The horror!

Being booked into a junior suite at Disney World instead of an executive suite!

It's almost as bad as having no money for groceries, or no food to feed you children...

Said absolutely no one.