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I truly think that to become a parent, you need to take some sort of class or pass a test first. So many parents make the dumbest mistakes, and unfortunately, the kids of those parents sometimes pass that stupidity down to their own kids. The circle of life. However, there are kids out there that are there to stop the parents in their tracks


Here are some crazy, stupid stories from the sons and daughters of Reddit. Enjoy it, or at least try not to cringe.

U/Bac0nLegs asked: What's the dumbest thing you had to convince your parent NOT to do?

​First off are the things that are just plane unsafe. These parents are lucky they didn’t get hurt.

Nooooooo.

My dad texted me a few months ago and said that he found mushrooms in his back yard, and that they were magic mushrooms because when he bruised them, the flesh turned blue. That obviously meant that they were safe. He used to do a ton of drugs when he was young.

I quickly told him not to do that, Googled an article about mushrooms, and sent it to him straight away.

I had to convince my 68-year-old father to not consume strange blue mushrooms in his backyard because then he would f*cking die.

Bac0nLegs

You’ll shoot your eye out!

A Christmas Story GIF by filmeditor Giphy

I love my dad, but he is not safe with bb guns. He looked down the barrel of one once when it was cocked and loaded.

Striking_Narwhal_917

Just last week I had to lecture my 60 yr old father after he took his new little handheld pellet gun and shot at the stop sign, ended up hitting the neighbors house. Thank goodness it didn't hit a window but still, you cannot go to the road, point a black hand gun at someone's home, fire and expect no one to be upset! I don't care if it's just a pellet gun! He's so lucky they didn't see and call the cops. I hate to say it but it's white privilege at its best.

Davis1511

People Break Down The Best Loophole They've Ever Exploited

Please go to the hospital!

Not to stay home and not go to the hospital after falling on the ice and getting knocked out for a couple hours.

"But I don't have insurance!" she complained, as her main reason. Mom, you should have insurance. At your age? Yeah, you need insurance.

I really can't convince her to go to the hospital in general if she has a medical issue that needs to be checked out. It's a 10-minute drive from her house and yet I can't convince her to go into her car and drive herself there. It's kind of sad, since many other people have to make the same decision: go see the doc and pay tons of money, or live with the affliction because you can't afford it?

Geico_fire

​It’s amazing how often older people get scammed. Luckily, they have their kids to save them.

Stay away from MLMs and pyramid schemes!!!

I have TWICE had to talk my dad into not giving money to a pyramid scheme. He's not a dumb man, he just gets really desperate and hopeful. There's nothing sadder than having to poke holes in an old man's dream.

ChaseDonovan

I was able to stop my mom from investing in the preacher's investment vehicles once but as soon as I moved away he scammed her out of 12k. He sold her on a stupid "inspired" selection of funds that went tits up within 8 months. Church preachers are super predatory people and I still don't understand how my mom could believe that a man who had no financial literacy or college education and was "reformed" meth addict was trustworthy.

Gimme-yo-lunch-money

We need Kitboga...

internet asl GIF by Wet Cement Giphy

I walked in as my dad was on the phone with someone after his computer got that stupid pop up that he had a virus and needed to call someone to fix it over the phone. I'm honestly terrified of how susceptible my parents seem to be to scammers.

OmahaSub

My mom's friend did this. It said she had a virus and to call the number. She called and they told her for a mere $400 she could get year long virus protection on her computer. She paid with her credit card. My mom thinks she had doubts right after paying and that's why she called her. She bragged about the new awesome virus protection she'd gotten. My mom told her it was a scam and that she needed to call her credit card company. She didn't believe her. She called more friends, one who was a computer expert, and they all told her it was a scam. She admitted her mistake and called her credit card company. She's normally very smart but not with computers. Unfortunately, she died of Covid this year. No one is sure how she got it.

Myfourcats1

That is absolutely insane.

My bio dad almost handed over his patent rights to a woman who is conning him $300+ a month for spiritual advice. She's seriously wanted him to sign a contract where she would receive royalties from him for guidance counseling. To break the contract she could choose the gross profit of any 3 months and he would be required to pay 25x that amount. It took the entire family threatening to disavow him if he continued to speak with that woman for him to finally break ties.

Jedi-knt100

Thank goodness his kid is there to protect him.

I had to cry and beg my father not to let his thieving "girlfriend" move in with him. At the time I didn't know she'd literally stolen from him (although he DID know.) I thought she was just a constant source of stress, who he kept giving money to for various outlandish "emergencies."

Later, he admitted that she'd stolen valuable items from his house. Eventually, he wised up and filed charges. He's in a much better place now.

Marise20

​And of course, sometimes we have to prevent our parents from making the dumbest life decisions.

It’s high school romance all over again.

Confused Cbs GIF by Paramount+ Giphy

Updating their relationship Facebook status to "It's complicated" anytime they would fight over something as little as what to order for dinner.

Up_your_alli

And then when people ask about it they're like "I don't want to talk about it, please respect my privacy".

Amakurt

Bad idea.

Elderly mother with Crohn's disease, also very religious, had to convince her not to resume fasting for Lent after she had intestinal issues from something that she did eat... she's 85, it's not an obligation to fast at her age and in her condition. Oi yoi yoi.

ZeroContents

Beyond forgiveness.

Had to convince my dad that cheating on my mom for the second time was a bad idea. Came downstairs to hear him talking on the phone in the living room and saying things along the lines of "well it'd just be nice to have someone to spend time with".

He heard me come downstairs and decided to take the phone call outside. The dumb*ss thought that he'd be out a earshot just by closing the screen door to our patio. That sh*t ignited a flame within me so I just sat there at our kitchen table for him to come back inside. Once he did so, I simply asked him, "What in the f*ck was that?"

To which he had the audacity to act as if I was the a**hole for calling him out. He then spent the next ten minutes trying to justify his actions. Needless to say that I've lost a lot of respect for my father, especially when he tries to portray himself as a man of God. There's no forgiveness for something like that. I made the mistake of forgiving him the first time he cheated on my mother, but luckily I caught him before he tried to do it again.

Nyarlathotep-chan

It's insane how susceptible the older generations can be to things like this. Sometimes it's the kids that have to teach the parents, rather than the other way around.

This is definitely a universal experience. Luckily, they have us to make sure they don't get scammed or hurt.

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Typically, I would write an intro about my own experiences with the weird kids at school, but I WAS the weird kid in school. Not in a bad way, more like a “I had a John Waters phase” when I was 16 and everyone knew it. So like, cool-weird. At least I hope so.

Schools aren’t always so lucky to have the cool kinds of weird kids though. The spectrum of weird extends even further than that, and can sometimes end up very disasterous.

U/Imaginary_East5786 asked: What was the weirdest thing the weird kid did at school?

​Let’s start with the grossest of the gross. Because why not.

Was it worth it?

peeing ralph wiggum GIF Giphy

He heard that you'd automatically get suspended if you peed your pants at school. He wanted to find out if it was true, peed his pants, got suspended.

Memoryduel

Scientific method:

> Observation: 'I've heard that by peeing your pants you will be suspended'

> Hypothesis: If I pee my pants I will be suspended

> Experiment: I peed my pants and I got suspended

> Conclusion: If I pee my pants I get suspended

Glez_fdezdavila_

Uhhh what was the intention here?

He got mad that he didn't understand how to play a game at lunchtime so he started hitting and punching the nearest person to him, who happened to be me. When I shoved him away and asked him what the hell was he doing, he whipped his unit.out, charged at me and when I shoved him away from me again he started crying and ran away with his member still sticking out.

Kurtles12

​Next ones up are the lowkey (or even highkey) disturbing stories. These weird kids can get a little scary.

Boom theret.

At my middle school, someone decided to get a little attention with a good old fashioned bomb threat. Except they thought that a bomb threat meant literally writing "bomb threat" somewhere. Worse yet, they misspelled the f*ck out of it, and wrote "boom theret."

So we had to go on a brief, very awkward lockdown while the police checked the perimeter for booms.

Angusthedangus

I hope there was no overlap in the columns.

Serial Killer Halloween GIF by GIPHY CAM Giphy

She wrote a list of all the girls and boys she wanted to kiss and murder and then casually passed it out on the playground.

Fun-Acadia-8735

2 separate lists or just the 1?

OppositeYouth

Same list 2 columns lol.

Fun-Acadia-8735

Holy crap.

Had the weird kid in high school ask the teacher to use the bathroom. She said no and this dude legit stabbed his hand with a pencil. Went all the way through then asked if he could now...sh*t was wild.

This was Pearl High School in Mississippi. This was the school Luke Woodham shot and killed his girlfriend and her friend at the school. This kid stabbed himself with the pencil about 2 months after that happened. This was late 1997.

Roberted1982

​Most of the time, however, the weird kids are pretty d*mn funny.

Ok, but this takes a lot of skill.

Had a kid nicknamed "cheeseburger" in the grade ahead of me in high school. He got his nickname because when it was time for his class to go to lunch, he snuck into the roof and crawled his way into the cafeteria, dropped down and proceeded to steal all the cheeseburger put out for lunch. Unfortunately they caught him in the act and sent him to the principal's office.

A year later he was caught stealing a teacher's computer, and in the process of being arrested he bit the officers hand, getting him sent to juvi never to be heard of again.

Theonering1

Every school had the cat girl.

cat dragging GIF Giphy

The weird kid at my highschool tied a string around his pencil case and pulled out around the halls pretending it was a dog. He still lives in my hometown. I think unemployed.

Oh also weird girl in middle school acted like a cat. She would meow and hiss at people, lick the water fountain and rub her body on the teacher's legs. In 8th grade. I have no idea where she ended up.

SendmePMsofyourBMs

Mood.

Weird kid in elementary was a self proclaimed alien. Once, while waiting for the bus, she told me "On my planet we eat people like you" and proceeded to bite me. We later became friends in high school and she used to give me massages during lunch break in the quad. Just realized now she was likely tenderizing me.

Iheartrevolution

I was exactly this kind of weird.

He didn't say much, but if asked, he would go to the front of the class and perform Tip-Toe Through the Tulips with all of the emotion and volume of Tiny Tim, holding nothing back.

The last I heard, he became an energy trader, made a ton of money and married well.

10per

I can definitely relate to that last one. In middle school, my English teacher would let me go to the front of the class and perform monologues or songs from Broadway musicals. Weird, but that’s what happens when schools cut funding for the arts and the theatre kids have no outlet.

As long as you’re not hurting anyone, I say let your freak flag fly, man

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