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People Break Down The Things A Guy Should Never Ever Say To His Wife

People Break Down The Things A Guy Should Never Ever Say To His Wife
Image by Tú Anh from Pixabay

"Honesty is the best policy" is the kind of oversimplification that gets people in trouble. It's easy to remember, it's only a few words, it generally is a pretty good take on things!

But it's half the story. It doesn't account for safety & security, mindfulness, or the idea that not everything needs to be said.

It's kind of cute when kids volunteer their nobody-asked-you opinions on things like the best dinosaur ever. It is way less cute when a grown-man offers his nobody-asked-you opinions on things like:

- your body.

- a thing you did "wrong" that they can't or won't do themselves.

- who/what their "best" was; extra points if it wasn't you.

A Reddit user opened several cans of worms when they asked:

What are some things that a guy should never ever tell his wife?

You can absolutely bet that this didn't stay "wife."

The stories, fam. I just ... you'll see. Girlfriends, boyfriends, husbands, other gender-fabulous partners; turns out exactly nobody is immune when a guy is deeply committed to sticking his foot in his mouth.

So since we're all about stuff in mouths, let's ease into this awkward by starting the article off with everyone's favorite passion: Food.

It's The Kids Who Really Suffer

australian children's television foundation wow GIFGiphy

"I didn't get to try my mother's lasagna till I was twenty years old."

"Why? My father, in a temporary bout of insanity, whilst eating my mother's home made said to her"

" 'This is really good lasagna, but you know who makes REALLY good lasagna? My ex wife.' "

"Still married, but he'll never live it down. Also, no lasagna for him - which meant no lasagna for me." - Tanisis22

"First time I ever tried shepherd's pie made by my mum was a few days ago when I (33) was visiting for dinner."

"Why do you ask? Dad (a man who can't cook, mind you) told her just after they were married that it's not the way his mum makes it."

"It was so damned delicious too!!!!" - Cheap_Brain

"I didn't have enchiladas until I was 7 because when my parents first married my dad said they were different than his mom's." - DDChristi

Moms Apples

Apple Pie Eating GIF by Anne Arundel Community CollegeGiphy

"My dad, who doesn't bake anything and barely cooks at all, while eating a slice of my mom's homemade apple pie:"

" 'You don't cut the apples right.' "

"And that was the last apple pie she ever made for him. Around 40 years ago." - Joe_Canada99

But Wait, There's More!

Who doesn't love having their appearance commented on???

10 / 4

Bruno Mars GIFGiphy

"I once heard my stepdad say (my mom was standing right beside him) that his ex wife was a 10 in looks but a 4 in personality. He then said my mom was a 4 in looks, but a 10 in personality."

"He thought it was a compliment."

"Aaaaand he still hasn't lived it down, but his story has changed over time. My mom is now a 7 in looks lmao." - J33P88

"That Surgery"

Nbc GIF by The VoiceGiphy

"Dad was drunk one night when I was 16 and said to mum that she was 'a fat f*cking cow' and wished she didn't get 'that surgery' as it was what made her fat."

"She had breast cancer. The surgery was to remove the cancer. She had a tissue expansion, which made her D cup breasts become E cups for a period of time and dad hated it." - EnchantedvortexEV

A Lil Disgusted Tone

Season 6 Ugh GIF by Parks and RecreationGiphy

"Not my husband, but an ex boyfriend."

"I dressed up for a dinner out, feeling super cute in my new dress. So I come up to him, smiley face and all."

"I didn't even asked him how I looked. Did not intend to."

"He just said, with a disappointed face and a lil disgusted tone:"

" 'You really wanna know what I think about your outfit?' "

"He's the ex for many reasons, but this one still makes me angry when I think of it. F*cker." - Youre_late_for_tea

No More Modeling For Him

rihanna lingerie GIFGiphy

"I was modeling some new lingerie for my ex husband and asked 'Do you like what you see?' In a flirty come get it kind of way."

"He looked up from his phone, gave me a once over and said 'I'd like you to lose some weight.' 💔 " - MangoMorning1913

A New Complex

meryl streep breast GIFGiphy

"My ex boyfriend told me he was glad my boobs weren't 'any smaller than they already were' and also that they were 'too far apart.' "

"Cue the complex about my boobs I never had before that comment :') " - t00manycooks

... or whatever is happening with these responses...


Angry Amazon GIF by Modern LoveGiphy

"When I was pregnant with my daughter, maybe ten-eleven weeks and really wacky hormonal, my ex suddenly looked up and said:"

" 'I know! If the baby is a girl we should make it Stephanie after my one true love.' "

"My name is 100% not Stephanie." - Bratbabylestrange

The Best "Give The Hardest Job To the Laziest Person" Success Stories | George Takei’s Oh Myyy

And Michael

Season 1 Nbc GIF by The Good PlaceGiphy

"An ex once told me he loved me almost as much as the ex that broke his heart."

"He continued to update me as I got closer to 'that mark' and finally once I surpassed that mark. I was young and naïve and he was my first boyfriend."

"I dumped his a$$, am married now, and I think he's still sulking around wondering why nobody falls for him. F*ck you Michael." - kneecoall

And Patti, Too!

Staring Episode 1 GIF by RuPaul's Drag RaceGiphy

"Dad didn't say this one TO my stepmom, but she heard it. I want to preface this by saying he was a known womanizer."

"Anyway, one time we were at a BBQ at one of his friend's houses. One of the guys who had served overseas had a much younger beautiful Asian wife."

"My dad had been drinking beers all day and at one point pulled me aside on the deck and said something like 'when Patti (stepmom) dies, I want to go to Thailand or the Philippines and find a girl like that.' "

"We turn around and standing right inside the screen door holding a tray of food to bring outside….my stepmom and her sister." - PurgatoryMountain

Let's wrap it up with some unwanted sexual criticisms:

A Better Cowgirl

Coeur De Pirate Cowboy GIF by La Voix TVAGiphy

"Few months into the relationship, my ex told me I'm bad being on top and his ex was amazing at cowgirl position. I was so upset and ashamed I ended the video call abruptly."

"He then apologized by saying 'but you're much better at oral than she was' as if that would erase the hurt. I never ever rode him again after that, even after he'd apologized numerous times."

"That single comment alone obliterated my confidence and comfort in having sex with him, cause I couldn't shake the thought of him thinking of his ex whenever we had sex."

"It didn't help that he kept saying my thighs were too big and I should eat less and burn more fat on my legs."

"I did ask him why would he compare me to his ex - he said he was just being honest."

"He told me how he doesn't like sugarcoating words and lying to me, so he'd say his 'honest opinions.' Told me it might seem harsh but he never meant to hurt me and that it was all to 'help me become better.' "

"In other words, he was being a total a**hole and proud of it. That's why he's an ex now." - nosebearnosebear

OK no, I lied. We can't go out like that. Let's have a palette cleanser.

Shout out to these wholesome responses. Thanks for saving the article.

A Lesson Well Learned

Fathers Day Dad GIF by GIPHY Studios OriginalsGiphy

"I'm a stay at home mom. My husband once, ONCE said 'well you don't work' in regards to something I wanted to buy for the kids."

"That Saturday I left him with the kids alone with a list of things I do every day to complete and came home after bedtime... there was never a comment about how I 'don't work' again." - Brotherfingeryou


happy turn around GIF by Dr. Donna Thomas RodgersGiphy

"My wife is a TERRIBLE whistler, but only whistles when she is extremely happy. I will never tell her how bad she is." - smartin9806

Adorable Satan

satan GIFGiphy

"When I lived in a foreign country and I was still learning the language I meant to say to my girlfriend 'you're so f*cking cute'

"But I actually said something along the lines of 'you're as cute as Satan.' "

"She was confused like ... 'What the f*ck did you say to me?' "

"Awkwaaard." - Mazurcka

So ... here's to sincerely hoping you take all of this to heart. Use it as a "what not to do" guide. Learn from their mistakes. Please?

People Reveal The Weirdest Thing About Themselves

Reddit user Isitjustmedownhere asked: 'Give an example; how weird are you really?'

Let's get one thing straight: no one is normal. We're all weird in our own ways, and that is actually normal.

Of course, that doesn't mean we don't all have that one strange trait or quirk that outweighs all the other weirdness we possess.

For me, it's the fact that I'm almost 30 years old, and I still have an imaginary friend. Her name is Sarah, she has red hair and green eyes, and I strongly believe that, since I lived in India when I created her and there were no actual people with red hair around, she was based on Daphne Blake from Scooby-Doo.

I also didn't know the name Sarah when I created her, so that came later. I know she's not really there, hence the term 'imaginary friend,' but she's kind of always been around. We all have conversations in our heads; mine are with Sarah. She keeps me on task and efficient.

My mom thinks I'm crazy that I still have an imaginary friend, and writing about her like this makes me think I may actually be crazy, but I don't mind. As I said, we're all weird, and we all have that one trait that outweighs all the other weirdness.

Redditors know this all too well and are eager to share their weird traits.

It all started when Redditor Isitjustmedownhere asked:

"Give an example; how weird are you really?"

Monsters Under My Bed

"My bed doesn't touch any wall."

"Edit: I guess i should clarify im not rich."

– Practical_Eye_3600

"Gosh the monsters can get you from any angle then."

– bikergirlr7

"At first I thought this was a flex on how big your bedroom is, but then I realized you're just a psycho 😁"

– zenOFiniquity8

Can You See Why?

"I bought one of those super-powerful fans to dry a basement carpet. Afterwards, I realized that it can point straight up and that it would be amazing to use on myself post-shower. Now I squeegee my body with my hands, step out of the shower and get blasted by a wide jet of room-temp air. I barely use my towel at all. Wife thinks I'm weird."

– KingBooRadley


"In 1990 when I was 8 years old and bored on a field trip, I saw a black Oldsmobile Cutlass driving down the street on a hot day to where you could see that mirage like distortion from the heat on the road. I took a “snapshot” by blinking my eyes and told myself “I wonder how long I can remember this image” ….well."

– AquamarineCheetah

"Even before smartphones, I always take "snapshots" by blinking my eyes hoping I'll remember every detail so I can draw it when I get home. Unfortunately, I may have taken so much snapshots that I can no longer remember every detail I want to draw."

"Makes me think my "memory is full.""

– Reasonable-Pirate902

Same, Same

"I have eaten the same lunch every day for the past 4 years and I'm not bored yet."

– OhhGoood

"How f**king big was this lunch when you started?"

– notmyrealnam3

Not Sure Who Was Weirder

"Had a line cook that worked for us for 6 months never said much. My sous chef once told him with no context, "Baw wit da baw daw bang daw bang diggy diggy." The guy smiled, left, and never came back."

– Frostygrunt


"I pace around my house for hours listening to music imagining that I have done all the things I simply lack the brain capacity to do, or in some really bizarre scenarios, I can really get immersed in these imaginations sometimes I don't know if this is some form of schizophrenia or what."

– RandomSharinganUser

"I do the same exact thing, sometimes for hours. When I was young it would be a ridiculous amount of time and many years later it’s sort of trickled off into almost nothing (almost). It’s weird but I just thought it’s how my brain processes sh*t."

– Kolkeia

If Only

"Even as an adult I still think that if you are in a car that goes over a cliff; and right as you are about to hit the ground if you jump up you can avoid the damage and will land safely. I know I'm wrong. You shut up. I'm not crying."

– ShotCompetition2593

Pet Food

"As a kid I would snack on my dog's Milkbones."

– drummerskillit

"Haha, I have a clear memory of myself doing this as well. I was around 3 y/o. Needless to say no one was supervising me."

– Isitjustmedownhere

"When I was younger, one of my responsibilities was to feed the pet fish every day. Instead, I would hide under the futon in the spare bedroom and eat the fish food."

– -GateKeep-

My Favorite Subject

"I'm autistic and have always had a thing for insects. My neurotypical best friend and I used to hang out at this local bar to talk to girls, back in the late 90s. One time he claimed that my tendency to circle conversations back to insects was hurting my game. The next time we went to that bar (with a few other friends), he turned and said sternly "No talking about bugs. Or space, or statistics or other bullsh*t but mainly no bugs." I felt like he was losing his mind over nothing."

"It was summer, the bar had its windows open. Our group hit it off with a group of young ladies, We were all chatting and having a good time. I was talking to one of these girls, my buddy was behind her facing away from me talking to a few other people."

"A cloudless sulphur flies in and lands on little thing that holds coasters."

"Cue Jordan Peele sweating gif."

"The girl notices my tension, and asks if I am looking at the leaf. "Actually, that's a lepidoptera called..." I looked at the back of my friend's head, he wasn't looking, "I mean a butterfly..." I poked it and it spread its wings the girl says "oh that's a BUG?!" and I still remember my friend turning around slowly to look at me with chastisement. The ONE thing he told me not to do."

"I was 21, and was completely not aware that I already had a rep for being an oddball. It got worse from there."

– Phormicidae

*Teeth Chatter*

"I bite ice cream sometimes."


"That's how I am with popsicles. My wife shudders every single time."


Never Speak Of This

"I put ice in my milk."


"You should keep that kind of thing to yourself. Even when asked."

– We-R-Doomed

"There's some disturbing sh*t in this thread, but this one takes the cake."

– RatonaMuffin

More Than Super Hearing

"I can hear the television while it's on mute."

– Tira13e

"What does it say to you, child?"

– Mama_Skip


"I put mustard on my omelettes."

– Deleted User


– NotCrustOr-filling

Evened Up

"Whenever I say a word and feel like I used a half of my mouth more than the other half, I have to even it out by saying the word again using the other half of my mouth more. If I don't do it correctly, that can go on forever until I feel it's ok."

"I do it silently so I don't creep people out."

– LesPaltaX

"That sounds like a symptom of OCD (I have it myself). Some people with OCD feel like certain actions have to be balanced (like counting or making sure physical movements are even). You should find a therapist who specializes in OCD, because they can help you."

– MoonlightKayla

I totally have the same need for things to be balanced! Guess I'm weird and a little OCD!

Close up face of a woman in bed, staring into the camera
Photo by Jen Theodore

Experiencing death is a fascinating and frightening idea.

Who doesn't want to know what is waiting for us on the other side?

But so many of us want to know and then come back and live a little longer.

It would be so great to be sure there is something else.

But the whole dying part is not that great, so we'll have to rely on other people's accounts.

Redditor AlaskaStiletto wanted to hear from everyone who has returned to life, so they asked:

"Redditors who have 'died' and come back to life, what did you see?"


Happy Good Vibes GIF by Major League SoccerGiphy

"My dad's heart stopped when he had a heart attack and he had to be brought back to life. He kept the paper copy of the heart monitor which shows he flatlined. He said he felt an overwhelming sensation of peace, like nothing he had felt before."



"I had surgical complications in 2010 that caused a great deal of blood loss. As a result, I had extremely low blood pressure and could barely stay awake. I remember feeling like I was surrounded by loved ones who had passed. They were in a circle around me and I knew they were there to guide me onwards. I told them I was not ready to go because my kids needed me and I came back."

"My nurse later said she was afraid she’d find me dead every time she came into the room."

"It took months, and blood transfusions, but I recovered."


Take Me Back

"Overwhelming peace and happiness. A bright airy and floating feeling. I live a very stressful life. Imagine finding out the person you have had a crush on reveals they have the same feelings for you and then you win the lotto later that day - that was the feeling I had."

"I never feared death afterward and am relieved when I hear of people dying after suffering from an illness."



The Light Minnie GIF by (G)I-DLEGiphy

"I had a heart surgery with near-death experience, for me at least (well the possibility that those effects are caused by morphine is also there) I just saw black and nothing else but it was warm and I had such inner peace, its weird as I sometimes still think about it and wish this feeling of being so light and free again."


This is why I hate surgery.

You just never know.



"More of a near-death experience. I was electrocuted. I felt like I was in a deep hole looking straight up in the sky. My life flashed before me. Felt sad for my family, but I had a deep sense of peace."



"Nursing in the ICU, we’ve had people try to die on us many times during the years, some successfully. One guy stood out to me. His heart stopped. We called a code, are working on him, and suddenly he comes to. We hadn’t vented him yet, so he was able to talk, and he started screaming, 'Don’t let them take me, don’t let them take me, they are coming,' he was scared and yelling."

"Then he yelled a little more, as we tried to calm him down, he screamed, 'No, No,' and gestured towards the end of the bed, and died again. We didn’t get him back. It was seriously creepy. We called his son to tell him the news, and the son said basically, 'Good, he was an SOB.'”



"My sister died and said it was extremely peaceful. She said it was very loud like a train station and lots of talking and she was stuck in this area that was like a curtain with lots of beautiful colors (colors that you don’t see in real life according to her) a man told her 'He was sorry, but she had to go back as it wasn’t her time.'"


"I had a really similar experience except I was in an endless garden with flowers that were colors I had never seen before. It was quiet and peaceful and a woman in a dress looked at me, shook her head, and just said 'Not yet.' As I was coming back, it was extremely loud, like everyone in the world was trying to talk all at once. It was all very disorienting but it changed my perspective on life!"


The Fog

"I was in a gray fog with a girl who looked a lot like a young version of my grandmother (who was still alive) but dressed like a pioneer in the 1800s she didn't say anything but kept pulling me towards an opening in the wall. I kept refusing to go because I was so tired."

"I finally got tired of her nagging and went and that's when I came to. I had bled out during a c-section and my heart could not beat without blood. They had to deliver the baby and sew up the bleeders. refill me with blood before they could restart my heart so, like, at least 12 minutes gone."


Through the Walls

"My spouse was dead for a couple of minutes one miserable night. She maintains that she saw nothing, but only heard people talking about her like through a wall. The only thing she remembers for absolute certain was begging an ER nurse that she didn't want to die."

"She's quite alive and well today."


Well let's all be happy to be alive.

It seems to be all we have.

Man's waist line
Santhosh Vaithiyanathan/Unsplash

Trying to lose weight is a struggle understood by many people regardless of size.

The goal of reaching a healthy weight may seem unattainable, but with diet and exercise, it can pay off through persistence and discipline.

Seeing the pounds gradually drop off can also be a great motivator and incentivize people to stay the course.

Those who've achieved their respective weight goals shared their experiences when Redditor apprenti8455 asked:

"People who lost a lot of weight, what surprises you the most now?"

Redditors didn't see these coming.

Shiver Me Timbers

"I’m always cold now!"

– Telrom_1

"I had a coworker lose over 130 pounds five or six years ago. I’ve never seen him without a jacket on since."

– r7ndom

"140 lbs lost here starting just before COVID, I feel like that little old lady that's always cold, damn this top comment was on point lmao."

– mr_remy

Drawing Concern

"I lost 100 pounds over a year and a half but since I’m old(70’s) it seems few people comment on it because (I think) they think I’m wasting away from some terminal illness."

– dee-fondy

"Congrats on the weight loss! It’s honestly a real accomplishment 🙂"

"Working in oncology, I can never comment on someone’s weight loss unless I specifically know it was on purpose, regardless of their age. I think it kind of ruffles feathers at times, but like I don’t want to congratulate someone for having cancer or something. It’s a weird place to be in."

– LizardofDeath

Unleashing Insults

"I remember when I lost the first big chunk of weight (around 50 lbs) it was like it gave some people license to talk sh*t about the 'old' me. Old coworkers, friends, made a lot of not just negative, but harsh comments about what I used to look like. One person I met after the big loss saw a picture of me prior and said, 'Wow, we wouldn’t even be friends!'”

"It wasn’t extremely common, but I was a little alarmed by some of the attention. My weight has been up and down since then, but every time I gain a little it gets me a little down thinking about those things people said."

– alanamablamaspama

Not Everything Goes After Losing Weight

"The loose skin is a bit unexpected."

– KeltarCentauri

"I haven’t experienced it myself, but surgery to remove skin takes a long time to recover. Longer than bariatric surgery and usually isn’t covered by insurance unless you have both."

– KatMagic1977

"It definitely does take a long time to recover. My Dad dropped a little over 200 pounds a few years back and decided to go through with skin removal surgery to deal with the excess. His procedure was extensive, as in he had skin taken from just about every part of his body excluding his head, and he went through hell for weeks in recovery, and he was bedridden for a lot of it."

– Jaew96

These Redditors shared their pleasantly surprising experiences.


"I can buy clothes in any store I want."

– WaySavvyD

"When I lost weight I was dying to go find cute, smaller clothes and I really struggled. As someone who had always been restricted to one or two stores that catered to plus-sized clothing, a full mall of shops with items in my size was daunting. Too many options and not enough knowledge of brands that were good vs cheap. I usually went home pretty frustrated."

– ganache98012

No More Symptoms

"Lost about 80 pounds in the past year and a half, biggest thing that I’ve noticed that I haven’t seen mentioned on here yet is my acid reflux and heartburn are basically gone. I used to be popping tums every couple hours and now they just sit in the medicine cabinet collecting dust."

– colleennicole93

Expanding Capabilities

"I'm all for not judging people by their appearance and I recognise that there are unhealthy, unachievable beauty standards, but one thing that is undeniable is that I can just do stuff now. Just stamina and flexibility alone are worth it, appearance is tertiary at best."

– Ramblonius

People Change Their Tune

"How much nicer people are to you."

"My feet weren't 'wide' they were 'fat.'"

– LiZZygsu

"Have to agree. Lost 220 lbs, people make eye contact and hold open doors and stuff"

"And on the foot thing, I also lost a full shoe size numerically and also wear regular width now 😅"

– awholedamngarden

It's gonna take some getting used to.

Bones Everywhere

"Having bones. Collarbones, wrist bones, knee bones, hip bones, ribs. I have so many bones sticking out everywhere and it’s weird as hell."

– Princess-Pancake-97

"I noticed the shadow of my ribs the other day and it threw me, there’s a whole skeleton in here."

– bekastrange

Knee Pillow

"Right?! And they’re so … pointy! Now I get why people sleep with pillows between their legs - the knee bones laying on top of each other (side sleeper here) is weird and jarring."

– snic2030

"I lost only 40 pounds within the last year or so. I’m struggling to relate to most of these comments as I feel like I just 'slimmed down' rather than dropped a ton. But wow, the pillow between the knees at night. YES! I can relate to this. I think a lot of my weight was in my thighs. I never needed to do this up until recently."

– Strongbad23

More Mobility

"I’ve lost 100 lbs since 2020. It’s a collection of little things that surprise me. For at least 10 years I couldn’t put on socks, or tie my shoes. I couldn’t bend over and pick something up. I couldn’t climb a ladder to fix something. Simple things like that I can do now that fascinate me."

"Edit: Some additional little things are sitting in a chair with arms, sitting in a booth in a restaurant, being able to shop in a normal store AND not needing to buy the biggest size there, being able to easily wipe my butt, and looking down and being able to see my penis."

– dma1965

People making significant changes, whether for mental or physical health, can surely find a newfound perspective on life.

But they can also discover different issues they never saw coming.

That being said, overcoming any challenge in life is laudable, especially if it leads to gaining confidence and ditching insecurities.