Friendships can be complicated. Someone who you adored can turn on you pretty quickly, sometimes your other friends or family (or dog - always trust the dog) just don't like a person and you can't figure out why. In a lot of situations the reason is toxicity.
No, not the System of a Down song - although we'll admit that song is a total medolic-metal-magnum-opus style jam. We mean people can secretly be total trash fests and sometimes it takes you way too long to figure it out.
Reddit user Eatmyshegg asked:
When did you realize your friend was toxic?
Real talk, a lot of these are downright horrifying. Read ahead with caution. People are capable of some seriously cringeworthy stuff.
Totally Cool
When he brought his "totally cool" friends over, and then they stole some of my stuff (an iPod and a money clip with some cash) and he defended them.
- ande8523
Cheating Isn't Funny
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She told me she was cheating on her husband, while laughing about how funny it was that her boyfriend would come over to the house and hang out with her husband and her and their newborn.
After I told her that wasn't cool and we weren't friends anymore, she told everyone that I was sleeping with her husband and an abusive drunk. (No to all)
Happy ending- dad divorced and got full custody, I got new friends.
- AuntGoat
Just A Hoe
"Nah trust me, you don't wanna ask her out, she's just a hoe."
He then proceeded to get with her.
DUFF
Many things but when she refused to come to my wedding because she hadn't had weight loss surgery yet & didn't want to look fat and frumpy on my wedding day... that was the culmination that lead to me severing ties. She used to refer to me as her 'DUFF' - the designated ugly fat friend. Then as we grew up, I slimmed down and grew into my appearance rather nicely and she did the opposite, which infuriated her.
She tried to make up a dozen excuses as to why she couldn't be my maid of honor. She couldn't afford to travel to my wedding, I offered to pay for it all. She couldn't afford the dress, which I also pair for my bridesmaids dresses... then when she went on a very lavish & expensive trip to a resort and posted photos on FB, I called her out. That's when she said she didn't want to go and be in pictures because she was having gastric surgery and my wedding was too soon for her to be hot in my wedding line.
heartbreak.exe
At that point, our other mutual friend melted down and literally listed all the ways my best friend was a frenemy & toxic. Feels bad, man.
Compliments
Back-handed compliments, also comments that she is amazing thinly veiled as a "put-down", almost like fishing for compliments.
I didn't want to hang out with her anymore when I realized I never felt good after spending time with her.
- 114631
Single White Female
She started copying me. Everything about me. It was something straight out of "Single White Female". She started using my frequent phrases, tried to pick up all my hobbies, and started dressing *exactly* like me. The final straw was when she started getting really possessive when I would hang out with people without her and tried to turn me against all my other friends.
We aren't friends anymore, but everyone tells me she's still obsessed with me and talks about how I abandoned her to anyone who will listen. It's been 4 years.
Fake Pregnant
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She tricked one of my friends that she was pregnant with their child, and used my phone to do it. She used to steal my phone while I was sleeping and text my friend (guy she hooked up with) pretending to be me, saying shit like "omg ____ is throwing up again this morning" and various other pregnancy things to convince the guy. She was not pregnant and 100% knew she wasn't.
Adderall
When they stole my adderall prescription, tried to help me find it (it was stolen during a party we threw) then spent the next few weeks staying up until 8AM playing FIFA like that was something totally normal.
"My Fault if She Died"
When she threatened to hurt herself if I didn't do what she wanted.
She asked me if she could sleep over at my house one night. I told her no, since I had grandparents visiting the next day.
She continued and tried to convince me to let her. She said that if I let her, she would stop cutting - but if I didn't, it would be my fault if she died.
I didn't let her, I "ditched" her the same year. She's still alive to this day. She has a girlfriend and is moving out of town soon.
Suicidal VR Pedophile
When he said "Everybody likes me more than you" for no reason what so ever. I then realized how much he'd been putting me down lately. Especially in the last couple weeks after he had a suicide attempt. I made the call that saved his life and he seems to resent the F*CK out of me for it. He literally spent the entire 2 weeks after his suicide attempt just berating me to anybody who would listen. He attacked my looks, my job, my wife, my friends(his mutual friends), anything. He literally made fun of me for being able to afford a better pc than him, called me a 'job cuck' and told me I'm bad at video games.
This goes further back though. We'd been playing VR chat the last year or so, but unfortunately as the game grew less and less popular with 20 somethings it become more popular with teenagers. Young teenagers. My friend is 30 years old, and he began a relationship with a 16 year old he met on the game. They "dated" for about a month, then when she broke up with him (for him pressuring her to send naked photos) he became insane.
He kept talking about suicide and how everyone plots against him, and I suggest he take a break from VRchat because it wasn't healthy for him. Nope, he does the opposite now. He's cut off every real world friend and spends every waking moment in VRchat being a pedophile and talking to people less than half his age. He's been grooming this 14 year old and I was trying to get his family to intervene with this but they don't believe me that he's doing it.
So when he just told me "Everybody likes me more than you" I just blocked him. Not with out him blowing me up "greifing" me for an hour straight while I fought to block him/delete him on every single platform. Some social media platforms I just had to give up entirely
He didn't used to be like this, but something happened in him and he's gone really hard off the deep end. EXTREME narcissism like I've never seen in a person before. He attempted to manipulate everyone he could against me but I took screen shots of all of it and sent it to the mutual friend group - who is now avoiding him because he made fun of them too.
- Light_PC
The Jacket
First day of high school my "friend" said to me:
"Eww you wearing the same jacket that you did in 8th grade, get a new jacket then talk to me."
Worst part was he was the unofficial leader of our friend group so they all cut me out. I got a new jacket a few days later, but never talked to anyone in the group again. It wasn't a loss.
All About Her
When I realized all of our conversations were about her and her insecurities and when I brought up my own problems she would straight up ignore them.
Being the supportive friend I am she basically used me to feel better about herself. We had been friends for years and this girl looked down on me and never gave a crap about me. This took me a really long time to realize. One time I saw her back after months, felt so drained after hanging out with her and cried when walking home. I knew something was wrong and proceeded to block her on everything. Haven't seen or heard from her since, and I don't miss her and her sh!tty attitude.
Funny thing, she would constantly shit on other people and whine how she never got invited to parties at her dorm. I was the only person who had the patience to put up with her sh!t. Kind of a red flag on it's own.
The Apocalypse
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She started getting EXTREMELY religious. I have nothing against religion of any kind, but this was just... A crazy kind of religious beliefs. She started speculating about some apocalyptic event, and she spent MONTHS of precious time researching it. It somehow came up in every conversation, and whenever anyone said anything to disprove the event, she would get PISSED. Eventually, I ended up stating my opinion on it, and apparently she decided then and there that I wasn't a good enough friend for her just because I didn't share those religious beliefs.
If that isn't toxic, I don't know what is.
Mood Swings and Mom Friends
I would be dreading what mood she would be in when the class period that we shared arrived.
This girl is either the nicest person in the world or very awful. I always made excuses because I knew her parents were horrible, and as the Mom Friend, I always seem to attract people with shitty parents who were looking for some sort of validation.
She developed a crush on me and tried to break me and my then-girlfriend up, and would treat me like sh!t when I turned her down. So yeah, she was definitely toxic. Still is. I hope that she's doing okay though.
Blackmail
When she literally told me she would blackmail me if I didn't give her my lunch or if I made her look dumb in class.
Flirty Friends
He was an older guy I had a bit of a crush on. And had a girlfriend, yet he encouraged flirting, which was confusing, as before I knew they dated, he would flirt and play-fight with me. We were in martial arts classes together. I was 15, he was 19. After a month or two of flirting, he began asking me more sexual questions, and would text me on Snapchat to say he was horny. The entire time we were "just friends." He would compliment me, backhandedly, and tell me about him and his girlfriends sex life.
At one point, he wanted to hug me and have me grab his butt. I (hesitantly) did, and felt nothing emotionally, or physically, while he later talked about how I turned him on.
Ew. When I turned 16, I started talking to who is now my best friend(16m), and distanced myself from toxic friend, stopped going to the same martial arts classes, and got over that (unhealthy as f*ck) non-relationship.
Almost a year later (I'm now 17) he text me and wants to be friends. I say fine, and we haphazardly text on and off. He's engaged. Good for him! He started flirting with me again, and I cut ties immediately.
His engagement just got called off last week. I wonder who else he was flirting with.
Cheating
When she kept trying to convince me to cheat on my boyfriend of 4 years and ignored me for 3 months when she got a friend with benefits.
- enioy
Why Bother
When I asked her for art tips because she was very good and I was just starting out, she said I'd never be as good as her so why bother anyway.
Atheist
She was very religious. She told me to break up with my atheist boyfriend. When I told her I wouldn't she proceed to tell me I have the devil inside me and that I'm going to hell.
Funny thing is after we stopped being friends, she dated an atheist.
The Leech
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When I told him how stressed I was because I'm working four jobs (video production) and he asked if I was going to quit one so he could take it. He's a leech, constantly looking for any opportunity to piggyback off of someone's success without putting forth any effort whatsoever.
- People Reveal The Moment When They First Realized Their Friend ... ›
- People Reveal How They Realized Their Friends Were Toxic ... ›
- People Explain Why They Cut All Ties With Their Group Of Friends - George Takei ›
When we're intoxicated, or even the slightest bit tipsy from having a little too much to drink, our immediate perspective on things is hazy.
But there's nothing like a bit of alarming news or a jarring incident to snap us out of the fog and focus on the moment.
Sometimes alcohol isn't always to blame for our impairment.
It can be a state of mind, like a perpetual numbness from being complacent in life, and all it takes is one shocking moment to rattle us back to our senses.
Curious to hear from strangers online about this type of scenario, Redditor Known_Challenge_7150 asked:
"What’s one thing that sobered you up real quick?"
These individuals were witness to shocking events that sobered them up right quick.
Bleeding Out
"Got out of a taxi and found a naked man profusely bleeding from his head crawling up the driveway in my condo. Called him an ambulance completely forgot I was absolutely wasted until 45 minutes later when I'd helped him translate and in to an amublance and stepped in my front door."
"Later a few days later learned he'd slipped in the tub and literally crawled out for help. Poor dude. He was fine but I genuinely thought he was going to die there."
– DongLaiCha
Tragic News
"At a bachelor party and we got a phone call that the groom’s father had suddenly passed."
– accountnameredacted
Bottom Of The Barrel
"I went to visit my parents back in July. I was homeless and deep into fentanyl addiction so I lost a lot of weight. My folks could see it. They knew something was up. Anyway, I spent the night and I was getting ready to leave in the morning and I looked at myself in the mirror for a good long time. I finally had enough and told them everything. They took me to detox, from there I went to rehab. Graduated in August and been living with them ever since then. I have 160 days clean and sober."
– Crotch-Monster
A reality check can be enough for some people to snap out of it.
Like Father, Like Son
"Was driving a drunk friend home, he had been on a bender again and was smart enough to call me for a lift rather than try and drive. As I helped in to his house his mother came down the stairs and said 'your as drunk as your father' and went back upstairs. I haven't seen him drunk since then, he still drinks but the thought of turning into his dad scared him out of hard drinking."
– psycospaz
Busted
"Flashing blue lights."
– FiddleOfGold
"This sobered me up just thinking about it."
– redmaple_syrup
Losing Sight
"Woke up to no sight in one eye. I had cataract surgery so just thought one of the lenses had slipped and it was an easy fix. Eye doc says nope, you had a stroke. I loved soy sauce, teriyaki sauce and salty food, which caused high blood pressure, which caused retina damage. Over six months was able to get most of my eyesight back with medication, and all back within a year. Trying to navigate life with one eye was very sobering. Started taking HBP much more seriously."
– MissHibernia
Quitting The Bottle
"Looked up someone I went to highschool with who was an awesome guy. Found out he had been dead for 3 years from alcoholism, at age 33. I made an overnight change. I hadn't started drinking that night yet, 10 months ago. Haven't touched it again since."
– omgtater
These disturbing moments were enough for Redditors to immediately come to their senses.
Unplanned House Guests
"Me and a buddy Woke up in someone’s living room, realized neither one of us knew the people, they were just nice and let 2 drunk guys sleep on their living room floor. We didn’t even say goodbye."
– Oneinsevenbillion75
Serious Health Warning
"Elevated liver enzymes."
"And the knowledge that this sh** was gonna kill me and I just couldn't orphan my family over it."
"So I opted for recovery, instead."
"Clean and sober since June 5, 2009."
– Far_Meal8674
The Joyride
"Grew up in a rural area. The little town hosted dances at the hockey arena, everyone (adults and kids) went and they overserved everyone, regardless of age. I was maybe 16 or 17 and was absolutely sh*tfaced, and jumped in the back of someone's truck with about 8 other people to go back to someone's cottage for after dance drinking. The driver (still don't know who it was) started racing one of his buddies and we whipped around small dirt roads, flying around blind corners on the wrong side of the road, going god knows how fast. It was basically a disaster waiting to happen. It was crazy scary and I was sober and thankful to be alive when we finally arrived."
– foxfood9116
The human psyche is a fascinating thing, isn't it?
How we can automatically focus on something urgent at a crucial time, even after getting buzzed from drinking too much alcohol.
But as we're in the thick of the holidays, it's a good reminder to drink responsibly and stay off the roads if you drive to your celebratory destination.
Cheers. Stay safe. And happy holidays.
We've all complained or vented about something in our lives which, in the grand scheme of things, wasn't exactly a problem, or is very easily solved.
Then there are those who complain about things that others almost hope will happen to them at some point in their lives.
These are known as "first world problems", as they are problems that pretty much only the world's one percent faces.
From having to fly business class instead of first class, or being served Roederer instead of Dom Pérignon, these complaints are often met with amusement, bewilderment, or even anger.
Redditor jennimackenzie was curious to hear the most absurd "first world problems" anyone ever complained about, leading them to ask:
"What’s the most ridiculous 'first world problem' you’ve seen people get worked up over?"
"Tale As Old As Time..."
"I once knew a mom who was legitimately devastated, to the point of tears/grief, because a doctor predicted her 8 year old daughter's final height to be around 5'2","
"Which wasn't tall enough to get cast as Belle at Disney World."
"That was the child's (and her mother's) only dream in life, apparently."
"Didn't appreciate my suggestion that she could be Minnie or Mickey."
"Lol!"
"Only a face character would do!"- TravelLovingMom
"Must Be Funny, In A Rich Man's World..."
"My boss from about a decade ago was this insanely rich dude who always went to the bank to get fresh and crisp currency."
"He'd call the bank in advance to make sure they had some on hand."
"I think he was a germaphobe."
"He had a trash can that he'd throw $1 and $5 bills in that he thought was 'dirty' and regularly just donated it vs spending it."
"I asked him why he did this and he said it was too much trouble and asked if I wanted it."
"I said f*ck yeah dumped it into my bag and when I got home it was close to $400 in singles and fives.
"Another time, he wanted to upgrade all the computers in his studio, so we went to a store and bought 10 PCs."
"They all had $150 mail in rebates and he wasn't bothered to go through the trouble of mailing them in."
"3 weeks later I received $1500 after spending a whole afternoon filling out all those goddamn forms."- azninvasion2000
Money Burn GIF by nog
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Who Wore It Better?
"When I was about 19 years old, I was at my boyfriends family BBQ."
"I was wearing this pretty floral sundress."
"His cousins girlfriend showed up in the same dress and she was SO mad that she went and changed."
"I will never understand being upset when someone is wearing the same thing as you.'
"Did you really think that your shirt you bought off the rack is going to be unique to you?"
"No."- mertsey627
Seeing Red! Or Blue In This Case...
"The blue of the balloons wasn't quite the same as the bridesmaid's sashes."
"Years ago my wife and I attended a wedding."
"It was very low key."
"The dinner was in the dining hall at the university where the couple met, cinder block walls and all."
"It was a Baptist wedding - no booze and very serious."
"The dark blue balloons attempting to liven up the hall were a slightly darker shade of blue than the sashes on the bridesmaid's dresses."
"The bride lost here sh*t and absolutely raved for nearly an hour."
"I can't remember how they finally managed to talk her down."- mechant_papa
south park wedding GIF
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See You In Court!
"Rich neighbors who end up in expensive court battles because they disagree about where a tree can be planted or whether the color of a fence fits in with the street’s 'amenity'."
'These disputes get really heated and rack up huge lawyers’ bills."
"The most pathetic part is after the judgement when they are arguing about who should pay the other party’s costs."
"Lots of affidavits filed citing the 'emotional distress' they had to endure, or painting themselves as brave warriors who were forced to take a stand to fight for 'justice'."
"Also lots of pompous litigants insisting that the judge refer to them by their 'Dr' title."
"An absolutely insane dumpster fire of entitled rich people problems."- ElectrocRaisin
It's Always People With Money Who Don't Want To Pay!
"I work in a public library."
"People will get so so mad if they have to be put on a wait list for a book."
"A popular book that just came out."
"Ok our services are not only free but so are the books."
"You’re welcome, a**holes."- Switchbladekitten
A Warm Butt Is A Happy Butt!
"My own."
"We have a bidet toilet seat (Fabulous! Everyone should have one!) and not only does it wash your bum and blow dry it, but the seat's heated!"
"It's shocking how much a heated toilet seat makes the whole process more agreeable."
"Except: We had a power outage and I went to use the toilet and the seat was cold!"
"Unacceptable!"
"This shall not stand!"
"I was really upset because it didn't feel good."
"Then I stopped and thought: This is the most first-world problem anyone's ever had."
"I was really pissed because my heiny was tepid."
"I got over it."- DeathGrover
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Holy Matrimony!
"Weddings are a gold mine for this question."
"People get so hyped up over their 'most important day of their life'."
"They'll destroy friendships, go into debt, and have crazy expectations."
"It's not always the couple who go crazy, either."
"Sometimes, it's the parents or another family member who feels entitled to control the wedding."
"It's just a party."
"Be considerate of guests, have plenty of food and drinks, and enjoy it."- magicrowantree
When Fast Food Isn't Fast Enough...
"Having to pull off to the side to wait for a drive-thru order to be brought out to you because your food isn't ready and there's a line building up behind you."- demanbmore
In Case You Don't Think Customer Service Employees Are Undervalued...
"I was working the return desk at a Target next to a military base so I have so many stories."
"One of my favorites was a lady who had her baby shower before revealing the gender and was livid that she had received floral newborn diapers when she’s having a boy."
"It was a huge box of super expensive, all organic diapers, that we didn’t carry and therefore could not return."
"I cannot accurately express her fury and disgust."
"How dare either suggest her boy could wear feminine diapers."
"I suggested she donate them if she didn’t want to use them and she instead threw away the entire box."
"When she left we pulled it out and threw it in our donate bin."
"There have also been multiple times where mom’s order massive toys and when we bring them out to the car they get furious that they aren’t wrapped."
"We don’t offer wrapping services."
"Here’s the thing, if you don’t want your kids to see the toys you got them for Christmas or their bit to day DON'T BRING THE CHILD WHEN YOU PICK IT UP."
'I’ve had multiple women scream and curse me out that I had ruined their kids Christmas by bringing the toys they ordered out to the car like they requested."- clever-mermaid-mae
Customer Service Waiting GIF by Juno Calypso
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Happiest Place On Earth!
"I used to work for Disney."
"That in itself should tell you everything."
"However for fun I'll give you two specific stories one form our tech department and one from my wife who worked bookings."
"I specifically worked for their call center to help with technical issues with magic band and the website."
"Suddenly got worse huh?"
"A right of passage call everyone has at least one story of is the 'Dome call'."
"Basically there is a subset of Disney Guest (TM) that believes if it rains at Walt Disney world there is someone that will push a button to encapsulate the whole of Disney property in a dome to keep out the rain."
"I'm not kidding."
"If this button is not pushed they call our tech department to angrily ask why."
"My wife worked booking."
"Pretty much everything including Bibbidi Bobbidi boutique and Pirate's league."
"These two things did roughly the same thing difference being price and theme."
"BBB was expensive did more and was focused on princesses, pirates league did a bit less and focused on mermaids and pirates."
"Lady called up my wife, and got pissed about BBB being booked up (It goes FAAAAST)."
"Karen: 'Im going to give the phone to my daughter and I want you to tell her how you are ruining her vacation by not letting her do BBB'."
"Wife proceeds to explain how pirate's league is so much cooler and how she can be a mermaid or pirate and basically gets the kid to start demanding to their parents about how they want to be a mermaid instead of a princess."- trollsong
Disney World GIF
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The horror!
Being booked into a junior suite at Disney World instead of an executive suite!
It's almost as bad as having no money for groceries, or no food to feed you children...
Said absolutely no one.