The recognition that you are, in fact, a full blown adult tends not to come as a whimper. It's a sudden blast.
One experience--often mundane--compels a reckoning, and afterwards you look around with new eyes. You are an adult with an adult lens. Your reality is tinted, it likely had been for a little bit already, and you conclude adult things about all that you see.
A Reddit thread collected how that moment came about, looked, and felt for a variety of now-accepting, self-proclaimed adults.
For some it was a big life moment with stakes so high that it was clear only an adult could be in that position. But for most, it was a tiny occurrence; a knee jerk response in which they witnessed themselves with their guard down acting the futherst thing from kid-like.
egeuoglu asked, "What moment made you realize that you are not a kid anymore?"
When You Fit the Bill
"I told my niece she needed adult supervision to do something and she looked me like I was dumber than a block of cheese and asked why I couldn't watch her."
The Younger Generation
"When some doctors or teachers are younger than me." -- letionbard
"The last time I was at the ER I slowly realized that all the medical personnel treating me were younger than me." -- dorvann
"When I went to the dentist and he had the same name, but now it was my lifelong dentist's son." -- JeffTheAndroid
No Longer in a Vaccuum
"When my actions started to change a lot people's life."
" 'If I don't do shopping today I cannot cook for my wife and she would not have any food to take in the other day and in the next day I will be working so no one will buy food.' "
"As an example."
-- ButcherChef
"That Man"
"At work one day when I was 19, I heard a little girl ask her mom, 'What's that man doing?' and I turned to look at what man she was talking about and what the man was doing, only to discover she was pointing at me."
-- Finklemaier
Looking Over the Shoulder
"My first year of teaching. When we told the kids to get an adult if there's an emergency and I realized-I was the adult they would be getting." -- littlemissbookwrm
"I feel you there. Sometimes it just hits me that I'm the adult in the room and I'm responsible for everything, it's such a weird feeling." -- Gneissisnice
"YUP. I still look for a more adult-y adult." -- alykins89
Self-Imposed Parenting
"Having the 'we have food at home' talk with myself." -- NakedKittyAlucard
"Absolutely. I realized it when my thought process went from, 'What do I feel like having for dinner?' to 'What do I have to eat before it spoils and I wind up wasting the money I spent on it?' " -- cicadasinmyears
Cleaning is King
"I was really excited to buy a mop... From that moment on it all went downhill." -- LolaLoops
"When I was excited about a new vacuum cleaner." -- MiLeenalee
Snow Days Suck Now
"When I saw a forecast for snow and I was annoyed instead of happy." -- ApocalypseWednesday
"This is a great one. Kids see potential snow day and imagine all the fun a snowy day brings. Adults see shoveling it out of the driveway just so you can sit thru a sh!tty drive to work." -- ImWhatTheySayDeaf
"It's all fun and games until your car door gets frozen shut. 'Cmon you little...it's already 6:30, I'm late...MOVE.' " -- MEScout
To Do Lists
"When I realized I could never be fully relaxed because there's always some responsibility looming over me." -- SchindianaJones
"This is when weed stops being fun." -- _Citizen_Erased_
"This. This. I envy the younger me when I could just kick back and do nothing all day." -- TooneyLoonnz
Non-Discerning Adult Eyes
"I ate a pack of fruit snacks without checking to see what shape they were." -- mynameisbirthdayboy
"Damn, I'm 31 and not that stone cold." -- a-r-c
"You are unhinged." -- nacho_breath
"I just started biting the cheestrings instead of pulling them apart." -- BananasLover
Suddenly Mom
"The morning after my parent's divorce when I was 10. My father was an ultra helicopter/tiger parent. My mother was a neglectful abuser. We ended up with my mother."
"My siblings and I stood in front of the garage door for an hour before realizing our mother wasn't going to take us to school/daycare. I ended up carrying my siblings to their respective locations before making it to my own school by lunchtime."
"I picked up bus signup slips that afternoon and was forced to forge my mother's signature for the first time to try and get transportation. Later that week I also was forced to forge free lunch slips for us all because no one was going to make us food anymore."
Pragmatic Consequences
"I used to be able to take days off work whenever i wanted and now i find myself having to have the 'if you take that many days off you wont be able to pay your mortgage so suck it up and go to work' speech with myself at least once a week. lol"
-- Ellixxerrr
Me?
"When they said, 'Some people will meet the person they are going to marry here" at my university welcome speech."
"That sh** f***ed me up real good."
It's All Hanging by a Thread
"Realizing that nobody knows what the hell they are doing, everyone is just winging it."
"Asked a mate (one of the most well put together guys I know) if he had any adulting tips. Just came back with "if you ever find out, please tell me.' "
-- Holo323
More Lost than a Life
"When my mother died. I was 17 and the overwhelming sense of 'you're on your own, no one is going to protect you or do things for you anymore' felt like the sharpest transition to adulthood imaginable."
-- dxmxmlxx
Pop Culture Moves On
"When I was 19, I made I made a reference to one of my favorite shows from when I was 8-12, and a couple of 13-year-olds listening had no idea what I was talking about. I'm learning that those moments never stop happening."
-- Happy8Day
The Flash
"I was 23, no high school diploma, and a security guard doing access control at an ice cream plant. I realized that if I didn't get out of there and do something, I would be 50 in the a flash, and not seen or done anything worthwhile."
"My life would have peaked at 20 and the rest of my time amounting to little more than waiting to die."
No More Hiding
"When I decided to have an abortion. There was no more sitting back and letting my life run itself. I had to make a decision and one that would not only affect my life."
"I remember so desperately wishing someone could take over to choose but not doing anything was a choice in itself and one I wasn't mature enough to make at the time."
"Ironically making me more mature in the process."
-- emmamary225
Do you have something to confess to George? Text "Secrets" or "
The excuses people use to dismiss behavior range from mundane and meaningless to the sort of leaps normally reserved for kangaroos and Olympians. It's sometimes amazing that these excuses work - but they do.
Some of them work so well that they're just sort of "accepted." That, obviously, kind of sucks and is something we should avoid - so let's talk about 'em.
Can't swerve around what you don't see, ya know?
Reddit user TMTtasmachine asked:
What's the biggest excuse used for a-hole behavior that shouldn't be accepted as much as it is?
... and away we go.
Jerk Privileges
" 'That's just how they are.' "
"One of the biggest enablers for tantrum throwing, bullying, etc. is that they get treated with kid gloves to avoid dealing with them." - alexrt87
"Oh my God you hit the nail on the head. Whenever someone says 'that's just the way they are' I say:"
" 'Yes, that's the point! Glad you noticed too! Now is it okey-doke for them to be jerks they have special jerk privileges? Or maybe they are just people and should treat everyone else as such?' " - notatrumpchump
"It depends on how it's said."
"People are the way that they are, and you shouldn't be surprised when they continue to be that way."
"This, obviously, doesn't excuse it - but people also shouldn't be surprised when a bad person continues to make bad decisions. Neither should we waste space in our minds being bothered by it." - unlawfulfoxy
Harassment Isn't Humor
season 2 lol GIF by ShamelessGiphy" 'It's just a joke, bro.' Harassing people isn't humor." - loading__99
"Schrödinger's Douchebag"
"A guy who says/does offensive things and decides whether he was joking based on the reaction of people around him." - Eatsleeptren
"Dude, legit had someone come up to me and start shouting in my face, calling me Madison, pretending I was cheating on him. Literally the most crowded location outside a theater, everyone staring at us, looking at me like I was some horrible cheater while I was out with my then fiancé."
"I started hyperventilating, my fiancé nearly decked the dude, and then someone shouts 'CUT' like this is some big 'YOU'RE ON CANDID CAMERA' moment and everything's supposed to be okay."
"I burst into tears."
"It was the most humiliating moment of my life, and thank god my then fiancé, now husband is not the type to overreact or jump to conclusions, or be abusive. Imagine how bad that could have been for someone with an angry or abusive partner."
"Prank videos are a plague on the internet and there is a REASON so many of them are fake, or involve actors." - Darkovika
Stay Sober, Then!
Drunk Drinking Beer GIFGiphy" 'I was drunk / high / etc.' "
"Then don't drink?! Stay sober if you can't NOT be an a**hole!" - BasedBenjamin
"Alternately, I hear a lot of 'I'm a happy drunk!' "
"Yeah, according to your drunk a$s. That doesn't mean you're not an ahole. Not remembering is not an excuse either." - PepeBabinski
"I was that guy. I swore I was a 'happy drunk' - and I was. It was everyone ELSE who was miserable while I was happy."
"I was also loud, obnoxious, and I wouldn't remember sh*t the next day."
"Quitting drinking has been one of my best choices of my life." - TTungsteNN
"Help"
new girl coach GIFGiphy" 'I'm just trying to help you' " - Miserable-Air1234
"Every time I've heard this, they're manipulating me while helping only themselves." - mykittenfarts
"My Mom to a T. Everything she does is better than anyone else's and she always gets pissed that people don't praise her for 'helping.' "
"She's now a certified (by herself) psychic and I have come to the conclusion that she's not a covert narcissist but an obvious one. I really wish I was joking." - Silent_Discussion657
Parenting Problems
Leave Me Alone Run GIF by TLC EuropeGiphy"Any variation of 'I'm a Mother/parent.' "
"Had some lady cut me in line at a coffee shop and she hit me with 'I'm a single Mom of 3!' as her excuse."
"Ok? And? I was still here first." - maid-for-hire
"I'm a single mom and I f*cking haaaate when other single moms/parents pull that sh*t to get special treatment."
"Last week, I was having a rough morning, my kid was being difficult, and I was running late. I was rude to a cashier over a minor inconvenience."
"Not only did I apologize for my shitty behavior, I wrote corporate to let them know how professional and patient she was while I acted like a f*cking toddler."
"Was being a parent part of the reason I was frustrated? Absolutely. Was it an excuse for that behavior? HELL no."
"I acted like a b*tch, and I called myself out, and I apologized. I still feel bad about that - I rarely let things get to me to the point I snap at others." - ClusterfckyShtshow
"Wow. I'm a Mom as well and tired but it doesn't give anyone a right to use it as some sort of ploy to get away with stuff."
"Like, mice become Moms about 12 times a year. You're not special 🤣" - SpoonLoops
Believing Your Boss
The Office Monday GIF by 20th Century Fox Home EntertainmentGiphy"I had a boss say some really racist sh*t around me one day and the next day, out of nowhere, he says:"
" 'Don't believe half the things that come out of my mouth!' "
"It was not really an excuse, more like trying to cover for himself after the fact, but still stuck with me." - sirlongbottom441
"Report them to HR. Seriously." - kokichi--ouma
"Looking past the racist stuff for a bit, that's not a very encouraging thing to hear from a boss…" - WonderfulBlackberry9
Bad Day Again
Bad Day Reaction GIF by Schitt's CreekGiphy" 'I'm having a bad day/week' "
"Okay, so you decide everybody that you interact with deserves the same fate? Get out of here, dude." - myordinaryexistence
"We all got stress, don't take it out on me. I get some people have stress bad enough for it to be passable every once and a while (family member passing, etc) but general, stress should not lead to you being a jerk to me." - willsimpforfree
"Damn, I'm definitely guilty of this. Usually I remember to apologize after but at this point I've learned to just avoid the situation in the first place by minimizing my interaction with people if I'm in a shitty mood." - nozzzrul
"Reminds me of when that White boy went on a murder rampage and killed a bunch of Asian women & that a-hole sheriff gave a press conference telling the media that the 'poor boy had a bad day.' "
"My idea of a bad day involves going home after a rough day at work and just staying in the house."
"Apparently, I should change my ethnicity from Asian to White and go on a murder rampage, see if my @ss gets a sympathetic sheriff to say on my behalf that I had 'a bad day.' " - kingkazul400
It's Not An Excuse
Season 2 Reaction GIF by FriendsGiphy"This won't go down well, but using depression as an excuse. As someone who suffers from it, it's still not ok to treat others like sh*t" - Rainbowwallstickers
"Could not agree enough. My partner has a 'friend' who treats everyone like sh*t all the time, has no consideration for others and openly mocks people in public."
"She gets so much grace from those around her under the guise of her 'mental health.' It's so infuriating watching an adult woman never have to take responsibility for her actions." - 34boor
"I get there are some things you can't control, but you are still responsible for keeping that sh*t in check and if you're aware of your mental illness, you should be aware of how you approach people and situations."
"I'll admit I used to be guilty of using my mental illness to be an @ss, but now I'm trying to better myself" - VeeSquibbles
Florida Gonna Florida
Looney Tunes Florida GIFGiphy"People are letting Florida off the hook way too damn much. And I live in Florida."
"Just because it's hilarious doesn't mean it isn't still completely f*cked up." - AlphaWhiskeyOscar
"The phrase 'Florida Man' is almost always followed some heinous way a Floridian is being an a$$hole." - PepeBabinski
"I'm also originally from Florida, and that state has serious problems. We need to pay attention to it." - [Reddit]
Moment of honesty ... as a Floridian ... yeaaaah, I'm gonna have to agree with that last one.