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Hikers Break Down The Scariest Thing They've Ever Seen On A Trail

Hikers Break Down The Scariest Thing They've Ever Seen On A Trail

There's little more restorative than going on a hike.

Escaping from the hustle and flow, and enjoying the peaceful serenity of nature, and taking in all the beauty around you.

But every now and then, hikers may stumble across something a bit unsettling, even scary.

Making them want to return to civilization all the sooner.

Redditor purple_loves_bread was eager to hear about the creepiest discoveries made by experienced hikers while on the trail, leading them to ask:

"Hikers of Reddit, what's the weirdest/scariest thing you've found/seen during a hike?"


How did it even get there?

"A dolphin skeleton 50 meters from the water on a trail in Costa Rica."- argenntinosaurus

An unwanted visitor

"On a backpacking trip in the Sierra Mountains in California, my buddy forgot to put his toothpaste in the bear bag, which is a bag you put all food and aromatic items in to hang from a tree branch at night so the bears won't eat it."

"At about 2 a.m., we hear him yelling and get up to find a huge black bear on top of him in his tent trying to get at the toothpaste."

"The rest of us had to bang pans and throw rocks to get the bear to leave him alone."- The_Spyre

bbc one bear GIF by BBC Giphy

Literal grave robbers

"Hiking in Vermont."

"Saw a bright red shirt hanging in a tree off the trail, so I went to check it out."

"Saw a couple of freshly dug graves and a few really old headstones."

"Reported it - turns out it was someone stealing headstones from a local graveyard and relocating them."

"Don't know if they were stealing the bodies, too."- GravityoftheMoon

Improper hiking attire

"Me, my old roommate and a friend went hiking into the woods in Tennessee."

'We were going along minding our own business, then we came up on a stream."

"On the other side of the stream, getting ready to cross, was a group of about 5 or 6 dudes only wearing socks and shoes."

"Naked bros hiking in the woods."

"I'm all about being in your birthday suit or whatever, but it was weird seeing it for the first time and apparently its a thing."- BungJovi

Witness to a massacre

"I stumbled on a poaching dump when I was 14."

"I used to hike trails near our home, way out in the woods."

"I'd explore, and then have to find my way back without a compass."

"I went really far one day, probably 2-3 miles through these old logging trails."

"I started smelling something terrible."

"There was a rocky outcrop right before a steep cliff."

"At the bottom of the cliff, there was a massive pile of dead deer, most were decapitated."

"Some were fawns."

"Had to have been 20-30 of them at varying states of decay."

"The stench was mind-alteringly bad."


"When I thought I had seen enough, I heard 4-wheelers and decided to hide."

"Two poachers in camo rolled up and tossed two more deer carcasses on the pile."

"They smoked, talked, and then left after about 10 minutes."

"I was probably 15 feet from them the entire time, hiding under a hemlock tree."

"I did not recognize either of them, and I knew absolutely everyone on that entire side of town, it was only 15-20 houses in a 5 mile stretch."

"I ran home and told my parents."

"They didn't believe me."

"Plus, they didn't know I was running off to those trails, so I got in huge trouble for that."

"I mentioned it to our neighbor who was big into hunting, he seemed very concerned and brought it up to the game warden."

"They investigated it, found the dump site, but never caught anybody."

"I am 100% certain it was not my neighbor." - User Deleted

Up close and personal with nature's beasts

"Mountain lion came very close to me."

"It didn't seem aggressive but it was curious."

"After a few minutes of us staring at each other and me pissing my pants he finally lost interest and disappeared into the forest while I got the f*ck out of there."- -MultiF0rms

MOUNTAIN LION cougar GIF Giphy

An underground operation

"I've seen mountain lions, I've seen bears."

"The scariest thing I've seen was an elaborate grow operation in Northern CA."

"I crested a hill and walked 20 yards into this valley when I realized there were irrigated pot plants for as far as the eye could see."

"Reservoirs, hoses, camouflaged netting."

"My friend and I noped out of there as fast we could, both expecting to be shot on our way back to our car."- Zmirzlina

Not so itsy-bitsy...

"Hiking early morning in Hawaii and my stomach notifies me that it’s time to go #2 ."

"I find a porta potty near the trailhead and jump in to do my business."

"Once complete, I flipped my headlamp on to find the toilet paper, but instead find a huge, 5” in diameter, banana spider hanging out in the corner of the porta potty."

'Trying not to spook it I slowly reached for the 1-ply."

"As I do, my headlamp shines on this monster and it proceeds to FREAK TF OUT!!! "

"It runs in circles for a bit, both of us losing our minds at this point, and ends up between my legs inside of my underwear!!!"

"I’m at a complete loss for what to do, but eventually begin wiggling back and forth in an attempt to get this spider to remove itself."

"That didn’t work at all! Instead of exiting the premises, this MFer runs up my leg."

"This is the point where I give up and storm out of the porta potty yelling and screaming, pants around my ankles."

"No clue what happened to that spider, but it disappeared in a flash…just like my dignity."- Kamala__2024

Spider Web Halloween GIF Giphy

Free spirtis

"This was lower Escambia county in the early 2000's, more likely some rich hippie wanting to get back to nature."- driver_dylan

Major disaster averted

"I was on the 8th grade D.C trip."

"We drove out to a rural historical town in Pennsylvania for the day."

"We had a buddy system going, and honestly they didn’t really care where u went as long as u made it back on time."

"While everyone else was walking around and shopping at souvenir shops, me and by best friend decided to go on a hike into the woods nearby, which i later learned was part of the Appalachian trail."

'I was a little on edge about it, since there’s a lot of bears in the area, and we were completely alone."

"About two to three miles in we both kept noticing noises, nothing too out of the ordinary, sticks breaking, leaves rustling etc, but what really made us stop in out tracks was the sound of a man’s voice coming from the trees."

"The trees were completely overgrown and you would have to go seriously out of your way to even try to go in them."

"We just stood there, nervously looking around."

"We jumped when a man approached us from behind asked what was wrong, I constantly checked behind us to make sure we weren’t being followed and I never saw him while we were walking."

"I said that we just heard a noise and got startled."

"He then proceeded to ask us why we were out there, and that it was dangerous."

"I explained we were out here for school etc."

"We knew this wasn’t a chaperone, because they all wear blue, but what was strange was that he wasn’t wearing any hiking gear, not even a water bottle or backpack."

"Mid-explaining why we were out here my friend just tightly grabs my arm and doesn’t say anything."

"I knew something was wrong."

"The man takes another step towards us and my friend just grabs my arm and yanks it, we sprinted for at least a mile before we were far enough."

"I caught my breath and asked her wtf happened."

"She was on the verge of tears at this point and told me that that man’s voice we heard in the trees, was watching us from the trees making gestures to the man talking to us."

"When we got back to camp we told her mom, who was a chaperone, and also a deputy what happened."

"It was reported, and turns out both of them were part of a sex trafficking ring, and the man talking to us was carrying a knife."

"It’s scary to think what could’ve happened that if we didn’t run when we did."- -i_d_k_·

Did he ever find it?

"Me and a group of about 9 other guys were hiking in Isle Royale leaving camp for the morning to hike up the Greenstone Ridge."

"We came across a guy who had long hair, was barefoot, had one croc and a plastic bag in his left hand, and a Pepsi bottle in the right."

"He looked hungover and didn’t respond to any greetings."

"He had no pack and was at least 20+ miles from any ranger station."

"After hiking for several hours that day while on the Greenstone Ridge, underneath a tree overlooking a beautiful view of the isle southern side."

"Underneath the tree angled like a shrine was the other croc."- Greatfulgrey

Waving through a window...

"Here’s the true story."

"This happened to me when I was 17 years old, 12 years ago."

"I was on a week long Scout trip at a place called Big South Fork up in the Cumberland region on the Tennessee-Kentucky state line."

"We spent the first half of the week backpacking up in the hills, and the second half was spent taking it easy at base camp.'

'This happened our last day in the trail.'

"We had finished eating breakfast and we were ready to break camp and head out."

"Our campsite was at a place called the Litten-Slaven farm."

'We camped in a patch of woods in a little valley where they had once had a cattle pasture."

"At the top of the valley was a small shed, a spring-fed pond, and the old farmhouse."

"It wasn't a big house."

"It was a wooden house, with two rooms on the first floor and a loft on the second floor.'

"I would have loved to go inside and check it out, but nobody was allowed inside so it would be easier to preserve."

"Anyway, after breakfast I realized that I had left my walking stick up at the top of the hill by the old house."

"I went back to get it, and my friend, Chris, went with me."

"Rule #1: always take a buddy."

" We hiked up the hill and I got my stick."

"Then we made the hike back down to camp."

'We were halfway across the pasture when something told me to look back."

"I looked behind me and saw someone in the upstairs window waving at me."

"It looked like a woman dressed in white, but I glanced so quick it was hard to make out the details."

"I turned to Chris and plainly said, 'There's someone in the farm house'.”

"What follows is my thought process that occurred in the space of about half a second."


"There's someone in the farm house."

"There's nobody else here."

'Nobody is even allowed in the farm house."

"There's someone in the farmhouse."

"Sh*t."

“'There's someone in the farmhouse!' I screamed."

"I took off running as fast as I could."

"Chris had no idea what was going on and ran with me."

"We didn't stop until we got back to camp."

"I told the others what I had seen."

“'You should have gone in', said our scoutmaster, Chris’s dad, 'She probably had breakfast ready'.”- Jaustinduke

Predators are everywhere

"When we were about 11,10, and 9; my brothers, some friends and I, in Arkansas, we would spend a lot of time in the woods."

"About an hour away from any road, we had this cool tree house with a swing that was a set of handlebars tied to a rope."

"This swing was 30 feet in the air."

"Very dangerous... Anyway."

"One day, hiking to the tree house, we stumbled across this guy."

"He did not look homeless, but did look scruffy."

"He tried to convince us to hang out with him, saying he had porn and booze."

"We noped out of there."

"The guy was later arrested for molesting at least one kid."- redfeather1

Everyone needs an escape to the great outdoors every now and again.

Even though one never knows what lies in store, or what they may find.

Making the feeling of coming home all the more comforting.

People Who Wouldn't Quit Their Job If They Won The Lottery Explain What They Do

Reddit user BITE_AU_CHOCOLAT asked: 'People who wouldn't quit their job even if you won the lottery, what's your job?'

lottery tickets
Erik Mclean on Unsplash

A lot of workers daydream about some day winning the lottery and being able to say goodbye to their job.

Far too many workers are unhappy with their job duties, workplace dynamics or company culture.

But with a taste for luxuries like housing and food, they keep plugging away, year after year.

However not everyone feels that way about their job.

So what are these compelling careers?

Keep reading... Show less
Therapist talking during session
Photo by Mark Williams on Unsplash

Some people stand firmly stand behind their beliefs that everyone would benefit from therapy and that therapy is life-changing.

It's because of the totally life-changing truth bombs their therapist had dropped during their sessions.

Curious, Redditor anonymiss0018 asked:

"What is a little bombshell your therapist dropped in one of your sessions that completely changed your outlook?"

Communication Issues

"'If you don’t have these problems with any other person in your life, why do you think you’re the problematic person in this one?'"

- maggiebear

"I love this. I have a 'friend' who I always seem to run into misunderstandings with. Every time we had a conversation, it somehow turned into a debate even if it was me talking about my day. The conversations were never easy."

"I always evaluate myself first and take into consideration his critiques. He was very good at convincing me that I was contradicting myself or wasn't good at communicating my thoughts."

"I NEVER had this issue with ANYONE else in my life. I kept trying to figure out where the miscommunication was coming from. In the end, I just minimized contact and now I don't run into this issue."

- chobani_yo

"I read this quote somewhere once (and probably have it a bit wrong): 'It's a waste of time arguing with someone who is determined to misunderstand you.'"

- Reddit

Emotional Regulation

"'You can’t control your emotions, but you can control what you do with them.'"

"At the time, I was a young adult who had learned zero healthy emotional regulation skills (only suppression and shaming) growing up, so this blew my mind."

- lil_mermaid

Tough Relationships

"'It sounds to me like you are trying to convince yourself to stay with your girlfriend. I'm not so sure it should be so difficult.'"

"At the time he said this, I remember it was like he said, 'The earth is flat.' I thought he was crazy when he suggested relationships don't need to be difficult. But eventually, I started to realize I was trying to change myself to stay with this person rather than just being who I am."

"It took me three more months to finally break up with her but from that day on, I vowed to never again abandon myself just to be with someone I had convinced myself was better than me."

- metric88

High-Stress Situation

"I was at a high-stress time, and I asked her how people live like this."

"She replied, 'Oftentimes they have cardiac events.' She said it as an urging to care for myself as much as possible."

- KittenGr8r

The End of Alcohol

"I was struggling with my alcoholism, and we were discussing how I had been cutting back."

"She asked what I would consider success, with regard to my drinking."

"I said I wanted to get to a point where it wasn't interfering with my daily life. I wanted to just be able to have a glass of wine at holiday dinners or family gatherings."

"She simply asked me why. Why was it important for me to drink at those times?"

"It was as if she'd turned on a light. Alcohol had always been a key ingredient in every family function, for my entire life. When I smell bourbon, I think of my uncle. When I smell vermouth, I think of my dad. Alcohol ran through almost every happy childhood memory."

"But, even more than that, I was very afraid of the explanation I'd have to give when family and friends asked why I wasn't having a drink. I had tried to quit before but failed. What if I admitted my problem, only to fall off the wagon?"

"When she asked why I didn't want to completely quit, it was the first time I saw that last part of the big picture. I'd be willing to drink myself to death in order to avoid being scrutinized, or judged for possible future failures."

"That was the day I quit. I've been sober since May 6th, 2017. 2,407 days."

- sophies_wish

Acceptance vs. Enjoyment

"'Accepting something doesn’t mean you have to like it.'"

"That took away a lot of my inner conflicts about situations because I could accept a situation without expending energy internally fighting against the injustice of it."

- alibelloc

Emotionally Immature Parents

"You are not responsible for your parents' emotional wellbeing. They are independent adults who have been on this earth for many more years than you."

- SmokedPears

Not So Lazy

"'Why do you think you're lazy?' Then she listed off all the things she knows I'm doing for my family, my job, and my life."

"It kind of blew my mind when I struggled to come up with an example."

"She also described family dysfunction as water. Some families are messed up in a way that everyone can see the huge waves across the surface. Others are better at hiding it, but there's still a riptide that you can't see unless you're also in the water."

"It made me realize that trying to keep the surface from ever rippling doesn't erase what is happening underneath."

- flybyknight665

The Harm in People-Pleasing

"'Why do you make people more comfortable when you are uncomfortable?' when talking about people pleasing and fawning."

- ERsandwich

Agree to Disagree

"'Stop trying to get everyone to agree. When you need everyone to agree, the least agreeable person has all the power.'"

This really changed my outlook on planning family events."

- freef

Grieve and Start Anew

"For context, I had a major TBI (traumatic brain injury), seizures, strokes, and all around not a fun brain time when I was 28."

"They said, 'You have to grieve the loss of yourself.'"

"Most people wanted me to go back to how I was. The f**ked up truth is that part of my brain is dead. The person everyone (including myself) knew died. I needed to grieve the loss of myself."

- squeaktoy_la

Multifaceted Identity

"They told me that my job and career is just a way to make money; it's not my life or identity. That took a lot of pressure off me."

- unfairpegasus

Breaking the Cycle

"They validated me."

"'You always talk about not wanting to do to your daughters what your mom did to you. You worry about it so much in every interaction you have ever had with them."

"But your children are 19 and 21 now. They are happy and healthy and they trust you because you’ve never abused them in any way. So I just want to validate for you that you really have broken that cycle of violence."

"You did that. And you should be proud of it. I’m proud of you for it.'"

- puppsmcgee74

The Grieving Process

"I was constantly bringing up how I felt like a completely different person after my mom died... like there was a marked difference between before and after her death."

"But once, she was asking about my hobbies, I got really into describing all the things I loved to do or at least used to do before I got into a deep depression."

"She was like, 'Wow, you seem very passionate.'"

"And I just sat there like, 'Well, I mean, I can't change what I like to do, they're still fun to do.'"

"And it's like she knew when to take a step back, because it was like, wow, I may be super depressed about my mom passing, but I'm still me. I'm still my passions and those don't go away."

"I don't know, maybe it only makes sense to be, but it really started getting me back on track."

- Hannibal680

Sharing the Load

"I've never really had friends. I've had colleagues and classmates and housemates and people who have hung out with me, but I never really felt close to any of them."

"And I did that thing you see on here sometimes; I stopped reaching out to see if I would be reached out to, and I wasn't, which I took as confirmation that they didn't really want me around, or at the very least, that they wouldn't mind my absence."

"I was talking to my therapist about people I'd been close to in college, and she told me to pick one and talk about him. So I did. After I shared some basic stuff like his name and his major etc., and a couple of anecdotes, she asked me what else I knew about him."

"And I couldn't answer. It wasn't really a broadly applicable bombshell, but she said, 'What else?' and I started crying because I realized that for as simple as the question was, my inability to answer spoke volumes."

"I've never had good friends because I've never been a good friend. I'm withdrawn and reserved and I always made others do the work to drag me out, without ever extending my own friendship in a meaningful way in return. If I wanted to have meaningful relationships with other people, I would have to build them."

"I'm still working on this, but I'm trying to make more offers and extend more friendliness to others in my daily life."

- Backupusername

The discoveries in this thread were incredibly touching and profound; it's no wonder these were lasting concepts for these Redditors.

It's important to keep ourselves open to inspiration and insights from others, as we have no idea how their experiences could help us, or how we could help them.

Aerial view of a church in a small town
Sander Weeteling/Unsplash

There's something comforting about living in a small town.

It's characterized by close communities where neighbors know each other by name and there is an abundance of kindness extended to others.

Gift-giving is a commonality, as is the sharing of recipes, and people going out of their way to help each other in a time of need.

The pace of living in small towns is also a striking contradiction to city life, where crowds of people go about their busy lives without much interaction.

Curious to hear more examples of what small town living is like, Redditor official_biz asked:

"What's the most 'small town' thing you've witnessed?"

These are positive examples of a tight-knit community.

Live Updates

"We have a village Facebook page. Every time the ice cream man drives into the village, the entire page goes ballistic. People send live updates of where the van is and which direction he's heading. The ice cream man has started accepting DMs so he knows which streets to go down."

– PyrrhuraMolinae

Brush With The Law

"I’m from a town of less than 2,000 people. When I worked at the grocery store there people would often drop off stuff for my family members because they didn’t want to drive all the way down to our house. I no longer live there but recently got a call from my daughter. She had been stopped for speeding and handed over her license and insurance which happens to be in my mother’s name. The officer goes 'Hey, you’re Donnie’s granddaughter! I ain’t gonna write you a ticket but I’m telling Donnie when I see him tomorrow cause we’re going fishing.' She replied 'I think I’d rather have the ticket.'”

- Reddit

Roadside Catchup

"The traffic on the 'main street' of my town is so sparse, two drivers going opposite directions can stop and talk to each other for a few minutes without causing any problem."

– anon

When things go wrong, people take notice without incident.

Bank Robbery

"A guy robbed a bank and everyone knew immediately who he was and the teller got mad at him."

– AlexRyang

"A local bank was robbed and one of the tellers told the police to bring her a yearbook from about ten years earlier and she would be able to point the robber out. He had been in the grade before hers in school."

– Strict_Condition_632

Wise Woman

"When I worked at the bank in town there was an older lady that had worked there through 5 mergers."

"She knew everyone, there was a young guy yelling at me one day. She walked out of the back and he immediately quieted. She went off about telling his grandmother that he was treating young women like sh*t. She also said that if he didn’t straighten up not one girl in town would ever marry him she would make sure of it."

– ilurvekittens

Intoxicated Local

"Town drunk was paralyzed and used a motorized wheelchair to get around. I was driving home one Saturday night and said town drunk was passed out in his wheelchair doing circles almost directly in the town square. Had to call his brother who came and picked him up on a rollback truck. Strapped him down and drove off into the cold dark night."

– DoodooExplosion

Grazing Over To The Bar

"In my former small town, there was an older guy who'd lost his license after getting a few DUIs. Every day, he would ride his John Deere lawnmower to the corner bar around 3PM and sit around watching TV and sipping his beer well into the night. Then he'd head the couple miles back home on his mower. He even had a little canvass shell he put on when it rained or got too cold."

– brown_pleated_slacks

It's not surprising how small town people behave differently than those who are from metropolitan areas.

Welcoming Committee

"I lived in a small town. When I moved there, people would ask, 'Whose house did you buy?'"

–MoonieNine

"Move to a small town. 30 years later, you are still the new guy."

– impiousdrifter

"I lived in a small town for most of my childhood but I wasn't "from there" because my grandparents weren't from there."

– raisinghellwithtrees

"Worked with an older guy, relative of the owner of the business, he was 73. I asked him if he was a local, he said 'no his parents moved here when he was two.'"

– realneil

A Busy Day

"Lived in a town of about 5,000: A woman walked into the DMV on a Friday, saw that there were 3 people ahead of her and left to come back another time when they weren't so busy."

– KenmoreToast

Who Let The Dogs Out?

"My dogs got out while i was working. the police called my niece's elementary school (she was a 5th grader) to get her to round them up and take them back home."

– mediocrelpn

"There was a small kennel behind the police station for runaways. They called us saying they had our dog, and moments later our dog showed up home. He broke out of jail."

– Worried_Place_917

While life in a small town sounds appealing, I don't know if I can ever live in one.

I'm so used to life in big cities, I think it would be quite unnerving to adjust in a neighborhood where everyone literally knows your business.

I would be paranoid.

And I'm sure the same could be said of life in the big city.

Would you consider making the switch to life in a different setting?

Two women laughing
Photo by Dave George on Unsplash

Every now and then, a friend of ours might say something, or we might overhear a complete stranger say something that makes us stop in our tracks.

More often than not, what we can't believe we just heard is something so ridiculous, we can't help but put the person who said it in their place.

Other times, however, what we just heard might have stunned us silent because of how shockingly clever it was.

Resulting in our not wanting to scold or yell at someone, but rather give them a handshake.

Redditor SubmergingOriginal was curious to hear the sharpest and wittiest things they've ever heard, from friends and strangers alike, leading them to ask:

"Enough with the dumbest; what is the wittiest thing you've ever heard someone say?"

Don't Give Me So Much Credit...

'I was on a team at work that was on a project working insane overtime."

"One night after an 80-90 hour week, we were all sitting around the table trying to finish up so we could go home."

"Around 11, my buddy's wife called, dubious about the hours he'd been keeping."

"We heard her through the line - 'are you cheating on me?'"

"Exasperated, he looked at our boss, then replied 'honey, if I was cheating on you, I would have been home by now'."- lionbatcher

Eternal Optimism...

"Asked a blind guy if he'd been blind his whole life."

"He said 'Not yet'."- Feeling_Mode_6465

Free time Isn't The Only Thing He Has On His Hands...

"My brother got a vasectomy and when the doctor was releasing him and giving him instructions (with the nurse listening in), one of the orders was to 'come back and have a follow-up appointment after you’ve ejaculated 30 times'.”

"Without missing a beat my brother asked 'what time do you open tomorrow?'”

"The nurse couldn’t keep it together after hearing that."- UtahUtopia

Awkward Season 8 GIF by The Office Giphy

Double Whammy!

"My pal uses the phrase 'he doesn’t look strong enough to carry information' and it cracks me up every time."

"Calling someone stupid and weak in one fell swoop."- JennyW93

Can't Hide Your DNA...

'Whenever I jokingly insult my mum, she says 'that must be where you get it from'."

"She cracked the code."

"I can never offend her without offending myself."- JennyW93

Self-Sufficient!

"My brother was a line cook at a New Orleans restaurant."

"My mom was in town, staying at a fancy hotel, and he stopped by after work, still wearing his kitchen whites."

"He was reading a newspaper in the lobby waiting for her to come down when the shocked lobby manager sputtered at him, 'MAY I HELP YOU!?!?'

"He answered, 'thanks, but I know how to read',” and went back to his paper."- jobrody

Morph Current Affairs GIF by Aardman Animations Giphy

A Miracle!

"My brother-in-law’s comment."

"The entire family went out for my mother’s 80th birthday and after the meal we all went to a local park, largely occupied by the elderly, to rest."

"My mother needed crutches at this point, and they were resting against her bench."

"My 10-year-old niece, who looked like every starving waif image from Dickens, grabbed the crutches and started hobbling round the park."

"All the OAPs were following her progress with looks of pity until my brother ran up behind her, and kicked away the crutches."

"There was an audible gasp from round the park and then my niece picked the crutches back up and started chasing my brother, clearly intending to hit him."

"In the confused silence my brother-in-law’s voice rang out 'Praise be! She can walk again!'"

"We still think this was the highlight of the birthday celebrations."- DdraigGwyn

Still Legal, Whichever Way You Cut It...

"I picked up my pleasantly tipsy boyfriend from a nightclub."

"We were stopped by the Police for a random breath test."

"They asked me my age, and I said, 33."

"My bf blurted out '33? You told me you were 22'."

"Police just laughed and let me go."- Aggravating-Corgi379

Music Video Police GIF by Andrew W. K. Giphy

A Bit Too On The Nose?

"Business law class in college years ago, talking about the issues that black Americans had before the Civil Rights."

"Amendment, trying to travel through the south with the discrimination so rampant, trying to find restaurants to serve them and decent lodgings."

"My instructor was posing a hypothetical: 'So you pull up out front of this place, you're exhausted from driving for hours, and you see the sign out front says 'Ku Klux Klan Motel'."

"'What would you expect to find there?'"

"Without missing a beat, from the back of the room came this gem: "'Extra sheets in every room?'"- NedsAtomicDB

Not Yet, Anyway...

"I was working with my friend and his dad."

"My friend (26) heard an ice cream truck near where we were working."

"He asked his dad if he could have a couple dollars."

"His dad asked, 'what for?'"

"My friend told his dad that there was an ice cream truck in the neighborhood, and that they were playing music."

"My friends dad told him "'They don't charge anything to listen to the music'."- tatersalad1234567890

Words Escape You In The Literal "Heat" Of The Moment...

"A friend of mine is a teacher and her husband is known for his wit."

"She told this story to him:"

"One day at school a kid took the hall pass and returned reeking like smoke."

"She asked the kid if he’d been smoking and he denied it over and over."

"She was about to send him to the office when she noticed smoke coming from somewhere."

"She told the kid and he realized that he didn’t put his cig out completely and it was burning in his pants pocket."

"The kid noticed and frantically tried to put it out and someone finally poured water on it."

"Her husband sat listening to this with a weird look on his face."

"She asked him what was wrong."

“'What’s wrong???'"

"'This was probably the only chance you’ll have in your life to say literally, ‘liar,liar, pants on fire’ and you missed your chance'."- Luder714

On Fire No GIF by PEEKASSO Giphy

Amazing What You Might Say A Few Drinks In...

"When I went to a renaissance faire once, I went to a beer tent and ordered a Newcastle Brown Ale (seemed the most fitting for the surroundings)."

"The beer wench, without skipping a beat, said, 'Everyone wants a Newcastle - no one wants to remodel!'"- jayhof52

Read The Room People!

"My dad wiped out when skiing down a mountain and lost a ski."

"After a few minutes of hunting for it, he gives up, slings the one remaining ski over a shoulder and starts walking down the mountain in his ski boots."

"About half-way down, another skier stops and goes 'Gee! Did you lose a ski?'"

"My dad instantly replied 'No, I was out for a walk and found one!'"- PeterJoAl

There's a reason your mother always told you to "use your words".

As clever remarks can have a much more lasting effect on people than a push or shove.