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Dungeons And Dragons Players Share The Craziest Things Other Players Have Ever Done

Dungeons And Dragons Players Share The Craziest Things Other Players Have Ever Done

Dungeons And Dragons Players Share The Craziest Things Other Players Have Ever Done

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Dungeons and Dragons is a gaming institution. So many youngins' gather in basements for good, clean medieval fun. They rattle away the hours being a goblin or a dragon. And apparently this pastime can last long into adulthood. Who knew? Just kidding, we're here in our questing best.

Redditor _Rangerspawn asked Dungeon Masters of Reddit, what is the most surprising thing your players have done in-game?


I had a player wish for himself to be turned into a stone block. He'd been sent back in time somehow, I forget exactly how as this game happened in 1996, and was trying to find a way back. So he figured he could stand where the party was when he got sent back in time, wish himself to be turned into a stone block with a message chiseled on it reading "Wish for me to be turned into [character name]" His logic was they'd find the stone block waiting on their approach and his character would use his wish to change him back before being sent back in time.

So, I did that. Then I said to him, "Why didn't you just wish to go back to your own time?" He said, "Oh, I didn't think of that." And he was duly laughed at by everyone.


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My players tend to do some ridiculous stuff to the point where I could probably fill an entire thread with their shenanigans, but the first and best would probably have to be weaponizing butter.

During the first session the party found themselves in a small town library trying to figure out what's going on. Among other things they found a book with 1001 uses for butter, just as a throwaway detail. They check it out as well and I think nothing of it.

After the session I ask for downtime actions and the party's mad scientist comes to me and says "I want to make explosive butter." I have him roll for it and he aces it. He then posts a picture to our facebook group along the lines of "chicken + stick of butter = [chicken shaped blast shadow] + cooked chicken"

The rest of the group runs with this and it leads to an ever increasing spiral of butter related weaponry and paraphernalia. Buying a cow to secure their own supply and hiding it in their basement. Adding some herbs and spices to the mix and creating the basting grenade. After building a BPG, a different player took a skill specialty in food-based weaponry.

This of course deserved an equally weird response in kind. See, this kind of abuse of butter didn't go unnoticed, namely by the butter deity herself, Paula Deen. She waged a campaign of harassment against the party for infringing on her domain, eventually culminating in summoning a skyscraper-sized sentient corn on the cob to crush them.

In the lore of this world, butter is now a highly controlled substance and the French have become the most formidable military power in the world. Even when telling non-butter related stories from this game, I can only ever refer to it as "Buttergame."

tl;dr: Players weaponize butter, antagonize Paula Deen, propel French to military supremacy


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The entire party was about to die until they rolled to see if a players weasel familiar could remove the cork from a health potion and pour it into the wizards' mouths. He could and they all lived.


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They turned the game into SimCity.

PCs are thrown in into a dungeon for witchcraft, get broken out by an agent of the king, who knows they are innocent. Wants them to take down the guy who's going around accusing anyone he considers impure of witchcraft; because he's "cleaning up" the kingdom, he has the support of a lot of nobles who are bigoted fucks. That's why the throne can't act too openly against him, and decides to employ the PCs; if they kill him, everyone will just assume it's out of revenge.

King's agent basically gives them directions to where they can find this guy, but they get caught up on the detail of some of the nobles being in with him, and decide they want more details. They ask for an example, I throw out the name "Lord Hobbes" at random, and now the quest is suddenly "Investigate Lord Hobbes for corruption while completely ignoring the guy who is actually responsible for all of this".

So now I need to make a map of Hobbes' mansion and grounds for them to infiltrate, stat out guards and such, and invent something to happen. Turns out Hobbes is being blackmailed into compliance and isn't that bad a guy, he tries to hire the PCs himself to go after Witchfinder Douchebag so I can get things back on rails, and then just to tie off this plot cul de sac, one of the Witchfinder's agents kills him. PCs finally go after the guy they were supposed to go after, save the day, and as a reward I have the king give them Hobbes' title and mansion so I can reuse the nice map I made as their base, and all seems well. Of course, now they are technically the rulers of a small town.

Immediately this becomes their primary focus, ignoring any and all other plot hooks. They want to improve the town (which I now also need to map in detail), invest money, collect taxes, pass ordinances, improve trade routes, etc. Adventuring is now just a way to acquire funds and defeat threats to the town, which starts growing at an alarming rate. Gaming sessions are now 70% discussions on trade, revenue allocation, and fiddling with the town map.


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In one of my campaigns we had a knight who relied on mounted combat to be effective. He told me after creating his character that he had a contingency plan should his horse die, and all the details. His character came with a buff and mute armorer named Patsy and a little squire (whose name as far as anyone knew was squire). I was hesitant to add so many characters, but since one was mute I allowed it.

Eventually his horse is killed and he turns a side eye to me and goes "I activate the contingency plan". All the other players are so confused and dying laughing, as he begins to execute his backup. He pulls a backpack harness out of one of his packs and straps it onto Patsy's back, then climbs in and grabs his lance, and yells "Yah Patsy!" He practically piggybacks the rest of the game in order to get his mounted combat bonus.

One of the other players asked "is Patsy okay with this?" And he responded "Patsy has long dreamed of this day"


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One of the early plot hooks was an excommunicated priest having a vision of an angry bear guarding a cave. They got into a debate reminiscent of the swallow-coconut debate in Monty Python about whether a bear can properly be said to be angry. They eventually decided to look for the bear, not to investigate the vision, but to see what an angry bear looks like.


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Session 1. First session all of us have ran in.

Save my daughter says the sad villager

OK says the party

Goes through the dungeon.

Sees girl

"I firebolt her"

Me: "what... What?"


The girl was an illusion and the mission was a trick to get the party to unearth an ancient evil. They figured out one half, the girl was a trick. Still unearthed the evil.

But the whole party including myself was very surprised to see the coward sorcerer shoot a firebolt at a child instead of the skeleton boss.


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"I would like to sniff the door handle."

"You don't detect anything unusual."

"I would like to lick the door handle."


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The party had to fight a powerful Merrow that had a talisman they needed. Instead of fighting him, they tricked him into marrying a baboon that they polymorphed into a beautiful mermaid, getting the talisman in exchange. It was so absurd that I had to go along with it.


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This was far from the most surprising, but it was the most recent.

They'd driven a brother duo of dwarves from town (really duegar in disguise). Then they decided, that instead of following up on my elaborate plans for an Underdark-conspiracy campaign, that would instead fight the city council over the dwarf brothers abandoned that they could work an elaborate real estate scheme.

I'm trying to figure out which Underdark race would make the best realtors, in an attempt to get the campaign back on track.


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Rather than kill some hired thug that attacked them, they subdued him, tied him up, and questioned him. They gave him a name (Jimothy), and let him go, telling him that he was a good strong lad who'd be better-suited to a job in construction than this murdering business.

I threw in a cameo of him later, happy in his new job.


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Our DM always did custom campaigns. There would be special items made up by him and he would make unique classes for each of us to play. He was really good at it and our group played for years and had some awesome adventures.

One time I was leaning a little to hard into my chaotic evil side and long story short my team sold me to a group of devils from one of the planes of hell. They took me to this ancient relic thing that would transform me into a being of hell (what i got was based on my role from a percentage die so out of 100, 1%-95%being terrible 96%-100% being i might get something good). I had a one time use item where i could pick my roll, some mystic scroll about deciding fates. So i chose 100%. The dm turned me into a fallen archangel. Boys o boys did i knock that campaign off course when i showed back up.


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Via a combination of spells, alchemy, and teamwork, they enlarged the wizard's raven familiar, shrunk the gnome, glued the gnome to the raven, and had the raven fly along city walls while the gnome lobbed spells at the guards.


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My players once pooled all of their cash at about level 4 to buy a tavern and retire instead of following the plot any further. That was it, campaign over. They decided to play medieval fantasy Its Always Sunny.


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Failed the simplest puzzle I have ever made, instead choosing to trial and error their way across a floor covered in pressure plates.


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PLAYER: "I cast Death Spell."

ME: "Great. Do you target the Cultist swinging the golden ritual sickle, or the one holding the screaming baby?"

PLAYER: "I target the baby."

Me: "..."


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Recently they were sneaking through a goblin nest when the ranger felt the foot of a sleeping goblin gently rest against her. It was meant to warn the players that the hollows surrounding them were filled with goblins and that they should continue to be careful.

She says "I reach out with both hands and choke it to death".

... wha... what?

A high roll later, the rest of the group see the ranger do this and proceed to pull bone daggers and other small weapons and follow suit. Now they are crawling in and out of dirt holes, murdering sleeping goblins left and right.

Normally their rolls are cursed but not this time. No low rolls, several natural 20s and a few minutes later they have brutally murdered ~50 goblins and are covered from head to toe in blood, high-fiving each other for being the good guys.


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They became obsessed with a random loom I threw in as flavortext.

Our sorc crit failed his arcana check on it which convinced him that it was The Loom of Great Portent.

Demonic rites were performed on it to help them make decisions and carted it around everywhere they went.

They started a band called the Loomineers. Their secret society was called the Illoominati. The Fellowship of the Loom to outsiders. Loom puns for days.


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I gave my players a little more free will than a typical story arc, just to see what would happen. They inevetibly went evil, ransacking every town becoming a roving band of bandits, torturing key NPCs for info. When they got to a major city they couldn't walk through the main gate because of the bad reputation they gained, so they snuck in, took the king hostage, and launched him over the walls from a catapault claiming the city. When they finally met the main antagonist of my story arc instead of killing the Dark Lord, the Dark Lord joined the party because the party gained an incredibly evil reputation.

It was a hilarious story arc.


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It was only surprising the first time, but I had a friend who always played a cleric.

Every single time, his character would buy the largest mount he could get (an elephant, usually). Then he'd ride it to death, make dry rations from its meat, animate it, fit it with heavy barding and travel around in comfort from inside its (now padded) rib cage.

Basically a cross between an RV and a tank.

People Reveal The Weirdest Thing About Themselves

Reddit user Isitjustmedownhere asked: 'Give an example; how weird are you really?'

Let's get one thing straight: no one is normal. We're all weird in our own ways, and that is actually normal.

Of course, that doesn't mean we don't all have that one strange trait or quirk that outweighs all the other weirdness we possess.

For me, it's the fact that I'm almost 30 years old, and I still have an imaginary friend. Her name is Sarah, she has red hair and green eyes, and I strongly believe that, since I lived in India when I created her and there were no actual people with red hair around, she was based on Daphne Blake from Scooby-Doo.

I also didn't know the name Sarah when I created her, so that came later. I know she's not really there, hence the term 'imaginary friend,' but she's kind of always been around. We all have conversations in our heads; mine are with Sarah. She keeps me on task and efficient.

My mom thinks I'm crazy that I still have an imaginary friend, and writing about her like this makes me think I may actually be crazy, but I don't mind. As I said, we're all weird, and we all have that one trait that outweighs all the other weirdness.

Redditors know this all too well and are eager to share their weird traits.

It all started when Redditor Isitjustmedownhere asked:

"Give an example; how weird are you really?"

Monsters Under My Bed

"My bed doesn't touch any wall."

"Edit: I guess i should clarify im not rich."

– Practical_Eye_3600

"Gosh the monsters can get you from any angle then."

– bikergirlr7

"At first I thought this was a flex on how big your bedroom is, but then I realized you're just a psycho 😁"

– zenOFiniquity8

Can You See Why?

"I bought one of those super-powerful fans to dry a basement carpet. Afterwards, I realized that it can point straight up and that it would be amazing to use on myself post-shower. Now I squeegee my body with my hands, step out of the shower and get blasted by a wide jet of room-temp air. I barely use my towel at all. Wife thinks I'm weird."

– KingBooRadley


"In 1990 when I was 8 years old and bored on a field trip, I saw a black Oldsmobile Cutlass driving down the street on a hot day to where you could see that mirage like distortion from the heat on the road. I took a “snapshot” by blinking my eyes and told myself “I wonder how long I can remember this image” ….well."

– AquamarineCheetah

"Even before smartphones, I always take "snapshots" by blinking my eyes hoping I'll remember every detail so I can draw it when I get home. Unfortunately, I may have taken so much snapshots that I can no longer remember every detail I want to draw."

"Makes me think my "memory is full.""

– Reasonable-Pirate902

Same, Same

"I have eaten the same lunch every day for the past 4 years and I'm not bored yet."

– OhhGoood

"How f**king big was this lunch when you started?"

– notmyrealnam3

Not Sure Who Was Weirder

"Had a line cook that worked for us for 6 months never said much. My sous chef once told him with no context, "Baw wit da baw daw bang daw bang diggy diggy." The guy smiled, left, and never came back."

– Frostygrunt


"I pace around my house for hours listening to music imagining that I have done all the things I simply lack the brain capacity to do, or in some really bizarre scenarios, I can really get immersed in these imaginations sometimes I don't know if this is some form of schizophrenia or what."

– RandomSharinganUser

"I do the same exact thing, sometimes for hours. When I was young it would be a ridiculous amount of time and many years later it’s sort of trickled off into almost nothing (almost). It’s weird but I just thought it’s how my brain processes sh*t."

– Kolkeia

If Only

"Even as an adult I still think that if you are in a car that goes over a cliff; and right as you are about to hit the ground if you jump up you can avoid the damage and will land safely. I know I'm wrong. You shut up. I'm not crying."

– ShotCompetition2593

Pet Food

"As a kid I would snack on my dog's Milkbones."

– drummerskillit

"Haha, I have a clear memory of myself doing this as well. I was around 3 y/o. Needless to say no one was supervising me."

– Isitjustmedownhere

"When I was younger, one of my responsibilities was to feed the pet fish every day. Instead, I would hide under the futon in the spare bedroom and eat the fish food."

– -GateKeep-

My Favorite Subject

"I'm autistic and have always had a thing for insects. My neurotypical best friend and I used to hang out at this local bar to talk to girls, back in the late 90s. One time he claimed that my tendency to circle conversations back to insects was hurting my game. The next time we went to that bar (with a few other friends), he turned and said sternly "No talking about bugs. Or space, or statistics or other bullsh*t but mainly no bugs." I felt like he was losing his mind over nothing."

"It was summer, the bar had its windows open. Our group hit it off with a group of young ladies, We were all chatting and having a good time. I was talking to one of these girls, my buddy was behind her facing away from me talking to a few other people."

"A cloudless sulphur flies in and lands on little thing that holds coasters."

"Cue Jordan Peele sweating gif."

"The girl notices my tension, and asks if I am looking at the leaf. "Actually, that's a lepidoptera called..." I looked at the back of my friend's head, he wasn't looking, "I mean a butterfly..." I poked it and it spread its wings the girl says "oh that's a BUG?!" and I still remember my friend turning around slowly to look at me with chastisement. The ONE thing he told me not to do."

"I was 21, and was completely not aware that I already had a rep for being an oddball. It got worse from there."

– Phormicidae

*Teeth Chatter*

"I bite ice cream sometimes."


"That's how I am with popsicles. My wife shudders every single time."


Never Speak Of This

"I put ice in my milk."


"You should keep that kind of thing to yourself. Even when asked."

– We-R-Doomed

"There's some disturbing sh*t in this thread, but this one takes the cake."

– RatonaMuffin

More Than Super Hearing

"I can hear the television while it's on mute."

– Tira13e

"What does it say to you, child?"

– Mama_Skip


"I put mustard on my omelettes."

– Deleted User


– NotCrustOr-filling

Evened Up

"Whenever I say a word and feel like I used a half of my mouth more than the other half, I have to even it out by saying the word again using the other half of my mouth more. If I don't do it correctly, that can go on forever until I feel it's ok."

"I do it silently so I don't creep people out."

– LesPaltaX

"That sounds like a symptom of OCD (I have it myself). Some people with OCD feel like certain actions have to be balanced (like counting or making sure physical movements are even). You should find a therapist who specializes in OCD, because they can help you."

– MoonlightKayla

I totally have the same need for things to be balanced! Guess I'm weird and a little OCD!

Close up face of a woman in bed, staring into the camera
Photo by Jen Theodore

Experiencing death is a fascinating and frightening idea.

Who doesn't want to know what is waiting for us on the other side?

But so many of us want to know and then come back and live a little longer.

It would be so great to be sure there is something else.

But the whole dying part is not that great, so we'll have to rely on other people's accounts.

Redditor AlaskaStiletto wanted to hear from everyone who has returned to life, so they asked:

"Redditors who have 'died' and come back to life, what did you see?"


Happy Good Vibes GIF by Major League SoccerGiphy

"My dad's heart stopped when he had a heart attack and he had to be brought back to life. He kept the paper copy of the heart monitor which shows he flatlined. He said he felt an overwhelming sensation of peace, like nothing he had felt before."



"I had surgical complications in 2010 that caused a great deal of blood loss. As a result, I had extremely low blood pressure and could barely stay awake. I remember feeling like I was surrounded by loved ones who had passed. They were in a circle around me and I knew they were there to guide me onwards. I told them I was not ready to go because my kids needed me and I came back."

"My nurse later said she was afraid she’d find me dead every time she came into the room."

"It took months, and blood transfusions, but I recovered."


Take Me Back

"Overwhelming peace and happiness. A bright airy and floating feeling. I live a very stressful life. Imagine finding out the person you have had a crush on reveals they have the same feelings for you and then you win the lotto later that day - that was the feeling I had."

"I never feared death afterward and am relieved when I hear of people dying after suffering from an illness."



The Light Minnie GIF by (G)I-DLEGiphy

"I had a heart surgery with near-death experience, for me at least (well the possibility that those effects are caused by morphine is also there) I just saw black and nothing else but it was warm and I had such inner peace, its weird as I sometimes still think about it and wish this feeling of being so light and free again."


This is why I hate surgery.

You just never know.



"More of a near-death experience. I was electrocuted. I felt like I was in a deep hole looking straight up in the sky. My life flashed before me. Felt sad for my family, but I had a deep sense of peace."



"Nursing in the ICU, we’ve had people try to die on us many times during the years, some successfully. One guy stood out to me. His heart stopped. We called a code, are working on him, and suddenly he comes to. We hadn’t vented him yet, so he was able to talk, and he started screaming, 'Don’t let them take me, don’t let them take me, they are coming,' he was scared and yelling."

"Then he yelled a little more, as we tried to calm him down, he screamed, 'No, No,' and gestured towards the end of the bed, and died again. We didn’t get him back. It was seriously creepy. We called his son to tell him the news, and the son said basically, 'Good, he was an SOB.'”



"My sister died and said it was extremely peaceful. She said it was very loud like a train station and lots of talking and she was stuck in this area that was like a curtain with lots of beautiful colors (colors that you don’t see in real life according to her) a man told her 'He was sorry, but she had to go back as it wasn’t her time.'"


"I had a really similar experience except I was in an endless garden with flowers that were colors I had never seen before. It was quiet and peaceful and a woman in a dress looked at me, shook her head, and just said 'Not yet.' As I was coming back, it was extremely loud, like everyone in the world was trying to talk all at once. It was all very disorienting but it changed my perspective on life!"


The Fog

"I was in a gray fog with a girl who looked a lot like a young version of my grandmother (who was still alive) but dressed like a pioneer in the 1800s she didn't say anything but kept pulling me towards an opening in the wall. I kept refusing to go because I was so tired."

"I finally got tired of her nagging and went and that's when I came to. I had bled out during a c-section and my heart could not beat without blood. They had to deliver the baby and sew up the bleeders. refill me with blood before they could restart my heart so, like, at least 12 minutes gone."


Through the Walls

"My spouse was dead for a couple of minutes one miserable night. She maintains that she saw nothing, but only heard people talking about her like through a wall. The only thing she remembers for absolute certain was begging an ER nurse that she didn't want to die."

"She's quite alive and well today."


Well let's all be happy to be alive.

It seems to be all we have.

Man's waist line
Santhosh Vaithiyanathan/Unsplash

Trying to lose weight is a struggle understood by many people regardless of size.

The goal of reaching a healthy weight may seem unattainable, but with diet and exercise, it can pay off through persistence and discipline.

Seeing the pounds gradually drop off can also be a great motivator and incentivize people to stay the course.

Those who've achieved their respective weight goals shared their experiences when Redditor apprenti8455 asked:

"People who lost a lot of weight, what surprises you the most now?"

Redditors didn't see these coming.

Shiver Me Timbers

"I’m always cold now!"

– Telrom_1

"I had a coworker lose over 130 pounds five or six years ago. I’ve never seen him without a jacket on since."

– r7ndom

"140 lbs lost here starting just before COVID, I feel like that little old lady that's always cold, damn this top comment was on point lmao."

– mr_remy

Drawing Concern

"I lost 100 pounds over a year and a half but since I’m old(70’s) it seems few people comment on it because (I think) they think I’m wasting away from some terminal illness."

– dee-fondy

"Congrats on the weight loss! It’s honestly a real accomplishment 🙂"

"Working in oncology, I can never comment on someone’s weight loss unless I specifically know it was on purpose, regardless of their age. I think it kind of ruffles feathers at times, but like I don’t want to congratulate someone for having cancer or something. It’s a weird place to be in."

– LizardofDeath

Unleashing Insults

"I remember when I lost the first big chunk of weight (around 50 lbs) it was like it gave some people license to talk sh*t about the 'old' me. Old coworkers, friends, made a lot of not just negative, but harsh comments about what I used to look like. One person I met after the big loss saw a picture of me prior and said, 'Wow, we wouldn’t even be friends!'”

"It wasn’t extremely common, but I was a little alarmed by some of the attention. My weight has been up and down since then, but every time I gain a little it gets me a little down thinking about those things people said."

– alanamablamaspama

Not Everything Goes After Losing Weight

"The loose skin is a bit unexpected."

– KeltarCentauri

"I haven’t experienced it myself, but surgery to remove skin takes a long time to recover. Longer than bariatric surgery and usually isn’t covered by insurance unless you have both."

– KatMagic1977

"It definitely does take a long time to recover. My Dad dropped a little over 200 pounds a few years back and decided to go through with skin removal surgery to deal with the excess. His procedure was extensive, as in he had skin taken from just about every part of his body excluding his head, and he went through hell for weeks in recovery, and he was bedridden for a lot of it."

– Jaew96

These Redditors shared their pleasantly surprising experiences.


"I can buy clothes in any store I want."

– WaySavvyD

"When I lost weight I was dying to go find cute, smaller clothes and I really struggled. As someone who had always been restricted to one or two stores that catered to plus-sized clothing, a full mall of shops with items in my size was daunting. Too many options and not enough knowledge of brands that were good vs cheap. I usually went home pretty frustrated."

– ganache98012

No More Symptoms

"Lost about 80 pounds in the past year and a half, biggest thing that I’ve noticed that I haven’t seen mentioned on here yet is my acid reflux and heartburn are basically gone. I used to be popping tums every couple hours and now they just sit in the medicine cabinet collecting dust."

– colleennicole93

Expanding Capabilities

"I'm all for not judging people by their appearance and I recognise that there are unhealthy, unachievable beauty standards, but one thing that is undeniable is that I can just do stuff now. Just stamina and flexibility alone are worth it, appearance is tertiary at best."

– Ramblonius

People Change Their Tune

"How much nicer people are to you."

"My feet weren't 'wide' they were 'fat.'"

– LiZZygsu

"Have to agree. Lost 220 lbs, people make eye contact and hold open doors and stuff"

"And on the foot thing, I also lost a full shoe size numerically and also wear regular width now 😅"

– awholedamngarden

It's gonna take some getting used to.

Bones Everywhere

"Having bones. Collarbones, wrist bones, knee bones, hip bones, ribs. I have so many bones sticking out everywhere and it’s weird as hell."

– Princess-Pancake-97

"I noticed the shadow of my ribs the other day and it threw me, there’s a whole skeleton in here."

– bekastrange

Knee Pillow

"Right?! And they’re so … pointy! Now I get why people sleep with pillows between their legs - the knee bones laying on top of each other (side sleeper here) is weird and jarring."

– snic2030

"I lost only 40 pounds within the last year or so. I’m struggling to relate to most of these comments as I feel like I just 'slimmed down' rather than dropped a ton. But wow, the pillow between the knees at night. YES! I can relate to this. I think a lot of my weight was in my thighs. I never needed to do this up until recently."

– Strongbad23

More Mobility

"I’ve lost 100 lbs since 2020. It’s a collection of little things that surprise me. For at least 10 years I couldn’t put on socks, or tie my shoes. I couldn’t bend over and pick something up. I couldn’t climb a ladder to fix something. Simple things like that I can do now that fascinate me."

"Edit: Some additional little things are sitting in a chair with arms, sitting in a booth in a restaurant, being able to shop in a normal store AND not needing to buy the biggest size there, being able to easily wipe my butt, and looking down and being able to see my penis."

– dma1965

People making significant changes, whether for mental or physical health, can surely find a newfound perspective on life.

But they can also discover different issues they never saw coming.

That being said, overcoming any challenge in life is laudable, especially if it leads to gaining confidence and ditching insecurities.