People Describe The Dumbest Ways They've Ever Managed To Get Laid
Image by StockSnap from Pixabay

Let's talk about sex babies. Don't blush, talk to us. It's healthy to chat about lovemaking. For too long we've all been oppressed about this matter. We're taught to be silent. But this topic is no longer taboo (thank you, Madonna) and as long as we chat respectfully, then there is no harm.

I'm always fascinated to hear about the details leading up to sexytime between strangers or first times between lovers. More often than not it feels like simple dumb luck. Like, sex just fell into your lap. How does that happen? Is it luck, or is there an idiot savant plan in motion? Talk to me...

Redditor u/Residential_Raccoon wanted to know some tricks of the trade that the rest of us may be able to use, by asking:

What's the dumbest way you've managed to get laid?

Sometimes it's just a look. A direct look across the room or a crowded corridor can change the plans for the evening in some fabulous ways. When sex is involved, words aren't always necessary. I can attest.

Check!

Radio Station Checklist GIF by JMatt Giphy

"I jokingly told my sister's friend she was on my To Do List. She took it seriously and asked if I wanted to cross her off."

- OptionalDepression

Hungry?

"A girl I met in class was lost for her next class. Showed her the way and got her number (you know, if she gets lost again). We parted for the day. She was pretty so I ran the story to my roommate. Roommate decided to play a dumb joke by sending her a message saying that I miss her already. She texted her dorm address. Brought some food but she wanted to do something else. That was it. Lol."

- diesus

Wrong You

"A girl I worked with told my mate that she had a thing for me. Mate told me so on the next night out I approached her with unflappable confidence and we had a good night. Spoke to my mate the next day about it and he told me he got her name wrong, it was another girl who liked me."

"Update: Thanks for the awards! Totally unnecessary but much appreciated. And yes, I did end up having a casual thing with girl 2 a couple of months later."

- vote1steve

After 10...;

"Parked in a multi-story carpark while we went on our first date (had some grub). End of the night I offer her a lift home, she accepts. We walk to where I parked. The multi-story carpark is locked after 10pm, I hadn't noticed signs saying this would happen and didn't think it was a freaking thing in the first place. She invites me back to her sofa after I ask for any recommendations on taxi providers. An hour later we're both having the sex of our lives."

- randomer206

OH!

Sports Bar GIF by Originals Giphy

"I was at a bar and a girl sat down next to me."

"Her: What brings you here?"

"Me: tryna get laid."

"Her: lol, me too."

"Me: (looking around the room). Yeah, there's some good looking people here."

"Her: (says nothing, just stares at me)"

"Me: Oh!"

- hullaballoonist

Now why can't things like that happen to me? Those are movie scenarios. We're all just a pent up bag of sexy explosives. Just laying around waiting for someone to strike a match.

Scrubbed

radio remains GIF Giphy

"Spotless bathroom, she told me later she was undecided until she seen my bathroom was spotless."

- user3879344234

Club Time

"My friend was at the club and he's the kind of guy that doesn't go to clubs at all. He saw a girl on the dance floor he liked and we all told him he should go talk to her. He went down and 10 min later we see him walking out the club with the girl he liked. We were all shocked he got a girl the first try. The next day we asked what happened and he told us he just complimented how good her belly button looked. We all laughed our butt off."

- Impandamaster

Seth for the Win!

"A tinder match said I looked like Seth Rogen, she invited me to a hangout. When I got there she told me that "if she could have sex with any celebrity, it would be Seth Rogen"and I laughed, she then introduced me to a couple of her friends, and she asked them "if I could mess with any celebrity, who would it be?" And they both said "Seth Rogen". And I was a close enough second!"

- Repulsive_Push_8316

Feet for the Win

"A woman at my job said that my feet were sexy. I was wearing sandals. I said ok, thanks. Before our workday was over she asked if I wanted to go to her place, I was like, sure, thinking this was just a social visit. We get to her place and she says, you need to shower, I was like, ummm ok. I took a shower and she steps in as well and from there on we had lovely sex."

- canitouchyours

Sexy

new girl schmidt GIF by Vulture.com Giphy

"Stared at this woman and when she said, "What!?" I said, "I'm trying to seduce you. I'm just really bad at it." We have three kids now."

- thecckmonkey

Now that was some fun reading. And I def took copious notes. Did y'all? Take a chance, meet a new person... wear sandals.

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