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Drug Dealers Explain Why They've Called Child Protective Services On Their Customers

It's always interesting to hear about a "flipped script" situation.

For example, most people wouldn't think that dealers would call government officials on their clients, since they are generally breaking the law themselves.

But sometimes the situation just demands it.


u/Many-Bees asked:

[Serious] Drug dealers of Reddit, have you ever called CPS on a client? If so, what's the story?

Here were some of those answers.

A Happier Ending

This was a long time ago, and I've since gotten clean and started my own family.

But there was a girl I knew who was homeless with her newborn son. On Easter weekend, I was walking on this trail to go meet with some people to sell them a sack. It started raining and that, of course, made me mad. There's these bridges that cross over the top of the trail and lots of kids gather and smoke or get spun under the bridges...

And that's where I found her. She was passed out drunk with some random guy under the bridge while her newborn baby sat strapped in his car seat in the rain. He wasn't under the bridge. He was crying. And he looked dirty.

I didn't have any children at this point, but I panicked seeing the little guy. I grabbed him, dropped all the shit I was supposed to be selling, and walked off the trail and up the couple blocks to the police station. I told them what happened and where I'd found him. Cps took him and he ended up getting adopted.

ladykage6829

How To Save A Life

When I was selling to her a lady SHOOK HER CRYING BABY in front of me. I wigged out, took the baby, dumped ~500 worth of goods and called 911 from my car. She didn't put up a fight until the cops came to arrest her. She tried to sue me for kidnapping.

Definitely not the best strategy for me (I was 18 and addicted pretty bad) but when the baby saw a doctor under state care he was covered in bruises, a couple of burns, and had 2 broken ribs already. I'm convinced she would have killed him. He's ten now and happy and thriving. The whole experience (and legal battle when she tried to have me charged with kidnapping) is how I got sober.

divebar-princess

A Life On Drugs

I used to deal way back when I was a hot mess in an extremely abusive relationship. I called CPS on not only 1 person, but 6. The one that sticks with me most though, not only because of the severity but because I called twice, was this couple who used to pick up from me at a laundromat and we ended up seeing each other often enough I felt okay to go to their place. I was so floored when I stepped through that door.

I kid you not, they had taken up all the carpeting in the house, and had torn down the walls to get at the copper wiring and pipes. They had no electricity or running water. There was nothing in that house except for some sleeping bags in what used to be the living room. And then I noticed a nest of blankets with bright blue eyes peering at me over the pile and realized that there was a toddler and a small child no more than 5. Until this point, I had never seen nor heard them talk about having kids.

The poor kids were filthy and obviously malnourished. The house stunk of meth so badly I gagged. I couldn't believe it. I guess the look of shock was super apparent on my face because the dad said they were squatting and introduced me to their kids. I made some small talk and then left. The phone was ringing for CPS before I closed my car door. I gave them the address and let them know the conditions of the home and they were squatting with two small children. Gave the names of the parents as I knew them and the names of the kids.

They ended up going to jail for the squatting and the kids went to live with a relative. They ended up contacting me back to sell to them after they were bailed out of jail and I never responded. However, the guy I was with at the time ended up selling to them and they were living in a field in a tent with the kids. I got into a huge fight with my boyfriend over it and was so disgusted he still sold to them. I ended up calling CPS on them again. From what I heard from other people that knew them, the kids were taken permanently after that and about a year later the mom ended up going to prison for attempted murder and the dad went to prison for check fraud some weeks after that.

witterpated

A Mess, And A Danger

Former dealer here. I once had a lady come in the trap house with a newborn. She was literally selling herself and or her baby for a "a few rocks". When I saw the newborn in used diapers and dirty AF I let her smoke and leave. I also called - BCW - Bureau of Children's Welfare on her as soon as she walked out. She lived on my street. I couldn't let her try to sell her baby. I couldn't let her keep it either. I just couldn't call the police. The baby was in a foster home less than a week later. The lady disappeared shortly after. I never saw her again. I hope she never got the baby back. She was a real piece of work.

Konvick

Why Don't People Care About Their Babies?

Ah yes back when I was younger, maybe 17 I got my first job at Domino's pizza. One of my managers was a really scummy 24 year old guy that looked like a troll, had astoundingly bad hygiene and also a bad attitude but sold good weed and bought me cigarettes. This was my first experience having older friends able to get me good stuff on demand like that. One day he hooked me up with a friend of his that was selling mushrooms, so I met with that guy and bought an ounce, and then walked to my managers house to sell him some and also get some weed. So turns out him and his similarly aged sister, who has a 1 year old baby, both live in makeshift bedsheet bedrooms in the basement of the tiny house.

They smoked inside, windows closed. Cats everywhere, bugs everywhere, weird gross sour smells coming from all areas. Everything gross. Their mom was home but she was senile and addicted to painkillers (as well as the sister). So we did the trade downstairs and when I go back upstairs I go to the kitchen to throw some stuff away and I see the baby in a highchair.... Eating a pack of cigarettes. He's just sitting there tearing them open and putting in his mouth and spitting it out. I ran downstairs and told the sister and she just started yelling "mom! Mom get the baby!", a couple times lazily, then gives up and goes back to just sitting there. It was surreal. I hadn't ever experienced such neglect and disgust from people. I left and waited 2 days to call cps because I didn't want my manager to know it was me who called. I know the kids got taken away and she went to live with a different family member, or at least that's what I was told.

Predicted_Text

Let Kids Be Kids

Twice. Left anonymous tips, which I know are hard to follow up for such a strained child protection agency, but as dealer it was all I felt I could do.

I found out later one of the kids was put into foster care, adopted by the foster parents, and recently graduated a trade school.

I have no idea about the other kids (siblings). But I hope they made it too.

Kids should be protected. Humans only get one childhood. Let's let kids enjoy it, and grow to happy adults. Don't hurt them intentionally or by your own stupidity**.

**that also means washing your hands people.

When/if you need to report to CPS you flood them with details. Lots of details. It's the only way they can act. A one sentence tip won't cut it.

uber-judge

So...You're Poisoning Your Kids

A friend of my girlfriend introduced us to her neighbors who were like 50-60 year old hippies that looked like a bad acid trip but bought weed regularly for full price.

Couple months down the road they start being more friendly with my girlfriend and I and start talking more when we'd go drop off the stuff. The topic began with her telling us how she has custody of her daughters oldest born because her daughter was sitting time at a women's prison. Back story on the kid - looks 15 but clearly has the mind capacity of a 6 or 7 year old, not sure what was wrong with her specifically but you could tell there were issues. Near the end of the conversation about her daughter she brought up the fact that her granddaughter was prescribed adderall 30xr and whenever they got her prescription they'd dump all the little beads into a bowl to use whenever they couldn't find meth or whatever they needed and instead fill the adderall with Benadryl to make the kid sleep.

Till this day I'll never forget the emotions I felt after getting out of there and sitting in my car. My hands were shaking so bad it was hard to google information about cps, much less type information in. I felt goosebumps in every pore of my scalp. As a father of two I never knew such evil existed. Obviously in movies but never experienced something first hand like that.

acadiia

The Lives In The Long Run

This is a sad story but I'll tell it anyways because it was the past. There have been sooo many stories but this one takes the cake. It's the reason I stopped selling and turned my life around.

I must've been 16 or 17 at the time. I was in High School, also had a part time job at Dairy Queen and on top school and regular job, I was also selling weed and cigarettes at school.

This story involves a crack user. At the time of this incident, I've already been selling hard for about 1 or 2 years. Profit was pretty good (I'd say around $300 per day on average which was great for my age) but I spent money as fast as it came, I was young and I was dumb.

So the incident is in this addicts house. He (about 50 year old man) has a girlfriend/partner or something like that. The girlfriend had a little boy, maybe the age of 3/4/5. At the time I didn't know how to tell how old a kid was. I didn't ask either because I was ashamed of myself for not preventing his mother from using. This kid though, I felt like he was my little brother in some way, I would cook for him when he was hungry and his mom was always too messed up to do anything.


One day, I go to work at the shack. It was a regular day. I get into the house, get my products ready, weigh out the stuff and bag them up. Knock on the bedroom door of the guy (home owner), I see him sleeping. His girlfriend is also on the couch sleeping because she is always high and messed up. The kid is just sitting there watching TV. I make him some macaroni and cheese.

Now I gotta wake up the guy because I need an update on what products he's moved the day before. So I go in his room. I see his eyes were still open. White foam all over him like he's overdosed. It's normal for me to see overdoses but this was beyond an overdose. He's been overdosed for too long which means he's dead. He was probably overdosed for at least 10 hours because I could smell it and he was cold to the touch. His vomit was dried and his eyes were dried.

Now I'm in one of the biggest panics I've ever been in. As I'm trying to figure out what to do, I sit down with the kid and stay there until he finishes his mac n cheese, thinking about what I'm going to do next. His mom, sleeping behind me on the couch is still alive but has no idea what'd happened or maybe she does, I don't know.

I left the shack. Drove about 2 blocks away. Use the prepaid cell phone I have to call the police and report it. Sat in my car until the police showed up.

From that day on, I am anti-hard drugs. I still wonder about the little kid, he's probably 16 now without a mom. Every time I see the mac n cheese at the supermarket I get this awful feeling in my gut. And for the guy that died, I know I didn't kill him (I've accepted that), but could he have lived longer if I was never in his life? His life story was pretty amazing, he did cool things when he was young. He got into drugs when his mom passed away, he didn't have a dad though.

One tip for anyone reading this: Never judge a person on where they are in life, even if they are "crack heads" as many people would say. Some people go through the most brutal situations and have no love and support to get on their feet. I'm glad I was able to be the mans friend before he died and I know I treated the kid as a big brother/father and I hope he remembers that part.

TheRollsRoyce

Things That Turn Your Life Around

Yes. I was a stupid teenager and thought I was a hot-shot from selling to my peers. The money was nice but at the time it was more for social standing. Eventually it got so out of hand that I was selling to peoples uncles, fathers, aunts, and cousins. It was pretty daunting as a teenager but like I said, the money way good and so was the social standing

One day a buddy calls me up and asks me if I'm good go. I tell him yes and ask him how much. He informs me that its for his mom (that he doesn't live with) and we go through the whole dance of him calling her, then calling me, then calling her again to set up the deal.

Eventually the amount and price gets set and I hop in my old car to the next town over to make the deal. Now I'm used to nasty houses. I live on the cusp of suburbs, city, and rural, so you see all sorts of folks in your daily life. But this one was a special little house. The best way I can set the scene up is the scene in breaking bad when Jesse goes into those meth heads house, but they weren't on meth.


Ive seen my fair share of dope-heads but these took the cake. It took about 30 minutes for them to let me in and when they did the stench was like a punch in the face. You couldn't even see the floor. All sorts of trash covering the carpet of the apartment. Honestly at this point it didn't even phase me, I made the deal and took the money but during the awkward small-talk I heard a little "coo" from the room over.

Im not the most confrontational person but they were so strung-out that I wasn't threatened at all. I asked them what that sound was and they said it was their baby. I asked how old. they said 7 months. I immediately took stock of the room around me. Rotting food, cat poo, garbage bags everywhere.

I left that apartment complex and sat in my car debating whether I would get busted if I called the police. Eventually I googled CPS and made an anonymous claim. Nothing happened to me and the kid got taken away.

Neither of them know it was me that called and I stopped selling and went through rehab in 2016. Clean ever since. Judging by their facebooks they're still trying to get that kid back. I really hope they don't.

Roast_Chikkin

Do Your Part For Your Kids

Not sure if this counts, but in the late 1990s, I used to sell part-time while I was in college. One of my regular customers turned his sister on to me. She called for a delivery. No big deal. I went there one time... She had three little kids. Like a couple toddlers and an infant. Her house was FULL of cockroaches. I was disgusted. I called CPS. Not because of the drugs and babies, but because of how filthy that house was. It caused a lot of problems for her and her boyfriend. They were in the system for a long time. Not sure how it all turned out. But, screw that woman.

Slummish

Weird Jobs Almost No One Knows About That Pay Surprisingly Well

Reddit user Rynoop asked: 'What are weird jobs nobody knows about but they pay well?'

woman writing on notes on window
Magnet.me on Unsplash

Growing up, kids talk about the jobs they want as adults.

Once they become adults, they select career paths or cycle through a variety of jobs.

Most people find mainstream jobs, but some luck into really unique professions.

Keep reading...Show less

We've all made our fair share of mistakes; it's in our nature, honestly.

Sometimes we mess up so badly, it can ruin other things in our lives, like important relationships or our jobs.

But some people have messed up so badly at work that they lost their jobs in record time.

Ready to hear the tea, Redditor mango-chocolate asked:

"What's the quickest way you saw a coworker get fired?"

Check Your Pride

"In my old law office, a firm-wide email was sent out announcing the arrival of a new employee. We will call him Paul."

"So Paul decided to reply-all to let all of us know that he was aware of our recent legal defeats, that many people should be fired for these failures, and that his hiring was the first good thing our firm had done in years."

"The dude was a legal assistant right out of college with no experience."

"A minute after the email went out, I heard a crazy shout and then watched one of the senior partners run past my office towards HR (Human Resources)."

"And five minutes later Paul walked past with the HR manager and a security escort. He lasted less than 45 minutes."

- Left_Apparently

Lotto Fraud

"I worked at a lotteries company. A guy working in testing got access to production data and printed off some test tickets with some unclaimed winning numbers."

"He only did low amounts, like 500 dollars, and claimed three of them in three completely different locations around town."

"Of course, the company was interested in the story of someone who found a six-month-old lottery ticket and claimed it, but they were even more interested to find it was the same person going to three locations."

"Needless to say, when they realized the guy actually worked in the company, he got pulled into a room with cops a-waiting him."

- ThroughTheHoops

Weird Brag

"I worked at a bank, we were robbed at gunpoint. One of the tellers was quick to tweet out, 'Woooo, got the rest of the day off!! Feel free to visit me at work with a gun and ski mask anytime!'"

"They were fired upon walking in the next morning."

- seastrat

Totally Stopped Production

"An id**t pressed the emergency stop for fun on his second day at work."

"The emergency stop that he hit switches off all drives on the 100-meter-long paper machine. This means there is a loss of production for three to four hours for the entire paper mill."

"He was immediately escorted from the factory premises by two colleagues."

- daHawkGR

No Point Taking That Test

"I had a coworker get picked for a random drug test. She went back to her desk to grab her purse, and just left the building, never to return."

- brytewolf

Yes, That's What We Meant

"The boss sat her down to talk about her recent behavior at work."

"She whipped out her phone and started taking a video, saying that it was her right to record for 'when it goes to court.'"

"The boss said, 'Okay, this is the kind of stuff I’m talking about, you’re fired.'"

"This was at a Domino’s Pizza."

- kenb99

New Definition for "Side Hustle"

"Evidently, they robbed a bank on their lunch break."

"They came back like nothing happened, and then the cops showed up and took him down. It was crazy."

- Bob_the_Brewer

Quite the First Impression

"Pulling into the parking lot on the first day, she ran into a light pole that took out electricity to the whole site."

"She wasn't wearing a seat belt and was thrown into the front window."

"When we went out to see what had happened, she reeked of booze and there were empty liquor bottles in the back of the car."

"She never even made it to the front door, got a guest badge, or started her orientation training."

- LowBudgetViking

Haunting Upcharges

"When I was in high school, I used to do seasonal work at haunted houses which I did for four years."

"A new guy that they hired was supposed to help with parking. Now, in the three years that I worked at this haunted house, they never once charged people for parking (it was a very dark parking lot off of a cliff so had to make sure no one drove off of it trying to park)."

"This cheeky son of b***h started charging people five dollars to park."

"It was only found out after someone complained because they didn't have the money to go in with their friends because they had to pay for parking. I think the guy was only there a couple of hours before he got fired."

- rpgmomma8404

Missed the Training

"They got hired and then fell asleep during a meeting their first day and were asked not to come back."

- Snowstorm-3

"Same here. At a tech company, they hired a new developer, and the owner caught him napping at a desk on day one when he was supposed to be reviewing training materials."

"The owner had a chat with him, and told him whatever the reason, it was really bad form to fall asleep on the job on the first day."

"The new hire apologized, understood, and went back to the training materials. Not 20 minutes later, the owner walks by again and the guy is passed out once again, so he walked over, woke him up, and told him he was fired and to get out."

"I don't even think he made it to his fourth hour of employment."

- badtz-maru

Highly Questionable Explorations

"Early in my career I was an engineer at a refinery in the UK, and I was in charge of the QC lab. By law, we had to have external independent testing on the refinery fuel products to confirm they complied with government regulations."

"It seemed getting a job for the testing company was that you had to be an adult and had a driving license. The lab had a lot of very nasty chemicals either being tested or used in the testing or cleaning of the oil products."

"A new young girl turned up for the testing company and was dipping her finger into a chemical called phenol and stating that 'it makes your hand and arm go numb.' Phenol is a severe muscle relaxant (including your heart) and can kill you at very low concentrations."

"One hour into her employment we had paramedics on the scene monitoring her vitals and was released after eight hours. She didn't last the first hour of the first day and the testing company was fined pretty heavily."

- Nerdymcbutthead

AKA: Paid to Advertise

"A guy got hired in the first firm I ever worked for. He turned up for his first morning at work, and within an hour he had emailed the entire company (6,000 people) about his band and their availability for birthdays, weddings, etc."

"He was dismissed by lunchtime."

- BDATriangle001

"So he got paid half a day's wage to advertise his band to 6,000 people?"

"Man's a freaking genius."

- Oakcamp

Not-So-Quiet Quitting

"One day, Tim announced that he wasn’t paid enough and was going to basically sit at his desk doing nothing until he was paid what he wanted."

"20 minutes later, the boss walked in and asked Tim if he could have a word with him."

"Five minutes later, the boss walked back in and announced that Tim no longer worked there and if there were any questions."

"There were no questions."

- Few_Horse4000

Don't Be That Guy

"Interviewed a guy that was replacing someone who was leaving. Offered the job and was supposed to start the next day."

"Just so happened that we were having a going away party for the leaving dude that night so new guy was invited as a chance to 'get to know the team.'"

"The new guy shows up and proceeds to get absolutely s**t-faced and asked the head of HR if she wanted to go back to his place because he 'got a vibe' during the interview process."

"Next day, the new guy was a no-show so we were thinking bullet dodged. He showed up just before lunch clearly hung over making up some excuse for being late."

"The big boss came out and told the guy to get the f**k out."

- tizod

Optional Hours? Optional Employment.

"I fired someone who decided her second day that she was going to go out to lunch and not come back. The next morning she told everyone all about the shopping she did. She seemed confused about the expectations."

- dunwerking

Some of these stories are absolutely worth shaking our heads over, while others are truly shocking.

It's crazy the lengths people will go to in the workplace, despite the expectations that had already been clearly set.

If you view the rules as optional, your boss might view your employment as optional, too.

A doctor
Austin Distel/Unsplash

We all have our bad days that can be completely debilitating.

Some days are worse than others and can lead to mental breakdowns.

For most of us, these moments are fleeting, and we can greet the next day with a fresh start and mindset.

But that luxury doesn't always apply to everyone.

Imagine those who perpetually experience such an extreme frequently, maybe even daily.

Curious to hear of various diagnoses of the mind, Redditor MeepingBad6699 asked:

"Mental professionals of reddit, what is the worst mental condition that you know of?"

There are patients who are convinced they are no longer with us but are still able to articulate it.

Dead But Alive

"Cotard delusion. I'm a nurse and had to take care of a huge man with this condition. He came in with some odd behavior and escalated to Cotard. The delusion makes you think you are actually dead. He would scream he was dead all day and night. Lived in constant terror. He was such a sweetheart, but became so worn down and terrified over time he got quite dangerous and punched a nurse in the face."

– bbourke0626

Unalive Patient

"I had a patient check into the ER with this once but I didn’t know the name, she just kept claiming she was dead. She got baker acted and transferred."

– Dimwit00

Rude Awakening

"Also a nurse. I had a couple patients get ICU delirium that presented with them believing they were dead. Definitely not a fun time."

"I mean it sorta makes sense. Being in the ICU can be comparable to torture with the sleep deprivation, constant beeping and other noises, lots of pain and other physical discomfort, the thirst and hunger (thirst and hunger are very psychological so even if we give someone nutrition through a feeding tube or IV, your brain still freaks out because you're not eating or drinking). And so for some people, if you wake up, don't know where you are and you feel like you're being tortured, reasonable enough to assume you are in hell."

– PaxonGoat

Statistics Say

"Wow. So according to the DSM 5 there have only been 200 cases since this condition was identified (how long ago, I want to say 1800s). Anyway, I just found a new study from 2022 that says that about 1% of patients with schizophrenia are now reporting this delusion. Which, as the authors point out, is a significant increase. I wonder what has changed in the decade since the DSM 5 was published that is driving this uptick?"

"It is especially odd when you consider that people actually used to believe that dead people could come back to life, even designing coffins and burial practices around this belief because it was so commonplace. You’d think if anything the condition would be becoming less frequent and not more. Interesting."

– DarthMomma_PhD

Severe memory loss is one of life's cruelest symptoms.

Losing A Sense Of Self

"Dementias."

"Watching a person, their memories, their personality die but their body remain living and confused, is horrifying..."

– Sacu_Shi_again

"Terrifying Prospect"

"My grandma has dementia (she can barely talk right now, but she's still physically healthy, somewhat) and a lot of my closely related family died due to Alzheimer's. Granted they acquired it / started showing severe symptoms when already quite old (early to late 80s), but it's still a terrifying prospect to know that I'll probably die in such a way. I hope that when the time comes, and it starts to affect me in a significant way, my wishes will be respected and I'll be euthanized. Both to spare me the horrors of it, and to not be a depressing burden to those around me."

– pale_sand

Warning Signs

"My grandma had it and now my dad is constantly complaining that he's forgetting things/can't remember anything. He's not even 60 yet."

– antisocialarmadillo1

Eating disorder was another horrific mental condition Redditors mentioned.

Hosting A Non-Existent Parasite

"Delusional parasitosis comes to mind with this prompt. I’ve watched a patient go to well over a dozen doctors trying to get confirmation that they’re parasite ridden. After countless stool samples, blood work, labs, scans, biopsies, etc., she clearly didn’t have any but remains convinced."

– Blahaj_shonk_lover

Side Effect

"A friend of my mom's ended up with something like this after getting into the wrong kinds of drugs."

"She was convinced that there were little bugs in her face. Absolutely convinced. She'd pick at her face day and night."

"She got clean for a little while, came to her senses, and stopped picking. But the damage was done, her entire face was scarred."

– ShiraCheshire

Alzheimer's hits too close to home.

I've known so many people related to or knowing someone with mental illnesses resulting in severe memory loss and it is heartbreaking.

Now a family member was just diagnosed and it's a lot for me to process it. It's not just the individual suffering. Their loved ones truly suffer too.

What I am learning, however, is to not take the present for granted. It's all we have.

Assortment of various food
Photo by Jimmy Dean on Unsplash

Whenever we go out to eat, be it at a fine dining establishment or a quick service window, some of us tend to wonder what the journey was for the food that we are looking at on our plates or in our take-out bags.

Many have similar thoughts when buying frozen or pre-packaged dinners at supermarkets.

The answers aren't always readily available, often because the food service industry will go to great lengths to keep them under lock and key. Well aware, most of the time, that current or former employees will spill the beans at one point or another.

Redditor Lilyxrx was curious to hear some of the most well guarded secrets of the food industry, leading them to ask:

"What’s a secret the food industry don’t want you to know?"

Next Time Your Craving Bananas Foster...

"The 'natural flavors' are just big jugs of glycerin with hyper concentrated flavoring in it."

"Banana flavoring is fairly flammable."

"Source: Worked in food manufacturing."- irony_in_the_UK·

Cholesterol Be Darned!

"Chef here."

"It’s salt and fat."

"If you have a question about anything it’s salt and fat."- LongRest

For Efficiency's Sake...

"Olive Garden makes all their necessary pastas for the whole day from 8-10am every morning."

"Partially cooked."

"So when an order comes through, they grab a serving of the needed pasta style and flash cook them in hot water."

"Also, it’s just the brand, Barilla."- Deerhunter86

Justin Bieber Food GIFGiphy

Before You Pay The Extra Money...

"Beekeeper checking in."

"There is no such thing as organic honey."

"I do not treat my bees with chemicals, but I have no idea where they get their nectar."

"A bee can fly up to three miles from a hive to get nectar."

"It is virtually impossible to guarantee they have not gotten nectar from a chemically treated source."- toad__warrior·

If You Ever Wonder What Makes It Taste So Good...

"Unless it’s a health conscious food joint you’re eating at, the food we serve is designed for maximum taste."

"It’s either dense with fat and sugar, or fat and salt "

"E.G. Those mashed potatoes you like?"

"Made with cream, butter, and salt."

"The quiche?"

"Made on cream, not milk."

"Etc, etc."- petuniasweetpea

Before You Start Bragging...

"Dragon fruit isn’t an exotic Asian fruit."

"It’s a cactus fruit, and as such are native to the Americas and can even be grown in the US."- ferretmonkey

dragon fruit GIF by Feliks Tomasz KonczakowskiGiphy

In Case You're Wondering why That Taste Is So Familiar...

"A lot of the processed cheese and cream cheese is all the same recipe we just switch the labels and packaging for the different brands we run."

"Source: I work in a cheese factory in a company that services 75% of America's domestic market."- anon5678903276

Another Reason To Have No Guilt Over Take Out...

"Well."

"I work at Dominos, and we are kept afloat by the people who don't coupon and pay full menu price."

"You people are the unsung heroes of labor."- LoweeLL

Unlike Any Chocolate...

"When I worked at a mass production bakery the chocolate for the chocolate covered doughnuts came in giant frozen blocks of 4x4 pieces and contained no actual chocolate what so over."

"When unfrozen it was like some sort of nasty smelling paraffin wax that I would break up with a hammer and place into a melter that would then pour over the doughnuts."- gil_beard

Chocolate Dessert GIF by HuffPostGiphy

What Do Orange Juice And Whiskey Have In Common?

"The reason orange juice tastes consistently the same year round, even though it's a crop harvested once a year, is because citrus oils and citrus flavor are added back to different batches and blended all together."

"Similar to how whiskey is blended from multiple barrels to make it consistent."

"The difference is that even though extra stuff is added back into the OJ, it doesn't need to be labeled because the flavors contain all ingredients from oranges (FTNF-from the named fruit) so the FDA doesn't mandate labeling additional ingredients."- PensiveDoughnut

Does That Explain Their Shape?

"Pringles (and baked Lays/similar) are made of rehydrated and compressed rejected/excess parts of potatoes that go into regular chips."

"I learned that from my dietician at work and thought that was odd."

"I still like them over regular chips."- bluesasaurusrex

A Secret Better Not Known...

"The 11 herbs and spices secret recipe."- NemoTheOneTrueGod

Food Pouring GIF by Great Big StoryGiphy

Just Pop It In The Fryer...

"I was a young lad working at Church's Fried Chicken during the summer, many years ago."

"The owner refused to throw out chicken that had already gone bad; to the point where you'd gag if you smell them."

"Apparently if you batter them bad boys up and deep fry them, the rancid smell goes away."

"His customers never knew they were eating spoiled chicken."- Dirt_E_Harry·

Sweet... But Safe!

"The amount of sugar that goes into Costco bakery products is absurd, especially the apple pie."

"That being said; Costco does not f*ck around when it comes to food safety."

"Every area that is responsible for producing food is most likely cleaner than a white room for producing computer parts."

"There are virtually zero roaches, we found one in the bakery once and shut it down until the exterminator did his thing that very night."

"Someone returned a package of dinner rolls because their child had bit into one and a sharp piece of metal was in it, within less than 2 minutes every manager in the building was doing an investigation that led all the way up to the regional manager and his boss for several hours and determined that it had come off of a piece of machinery before it reached our location."

"We throw away rotisserie chickens if they have left (even for a few minutes) the shelf and someone tries to put it back."- Deathnachos

Costco GIF by hero0fwarGiphy

We'd like to think that everyone who works in the food industry shares the same high standards.

But, as in any industry, there are those out there who will cut corners for speedier results.

On the bright side, it does save you the trouble when deciding what cream cheese to buy...