People Share Their Best Responses To Being Told 'F**k You'
Alex Motoc on Unsplash

You've probably had someone tell you "f*ck you" or to "go f*ck yourself" at least once or twice or ten times throughout your life and if you haven't, have you even lived?

But what do you say when you want to be smart and witty and want to shut someone down while you're at it?

After all, you can't just stand there, you probably should have a response lined up.

(Disclaimer: Know when to walk away, seriously.)


People shared their best suggestions with us after Redditor Bluephoenix681 asked the online community:

"What's the best response to 'f*ck you?'"

Clever.

"‘You want to what?’ Hopefully then the reply is another f*ck you."

divinetrackies

Hopefully – and when it does happen you must feel so powerful!

You could say this:

"In this economy?"

Trytek1986

I felt this in my soul.

The rent is too damn high.

Or this!

"Don’t threaten me with a good time."

Austintk

Who's to say it'd even be a good time, huh?

Ouch.

"Tell your mom to top up the cell phone she bought me so I can FaceTime her late night!"

catch10100

But then what do you say if they remark that their mom died?

The Welsh appreciate this joke.

"You'd never be satisfied with a sheep again."

citsonga_cixelsyd

Paging the Welsh – you must have a response to this joke.

You must.

Self deprecation.

"You wouldn't like it I just lay there."

Drongo11

Ummm... you might want to work on that, in that case.

How polite!

"Thank you."

Select_Coyote7644

Kill them with kindness.

They won't know what hit them.

Burn.

"You aren’t my type.”

Ape28Comoco

This is an excellent way to stop someone in their tracks.

This works, too.

"My go to response to statements like this is “I will try anything 4 times." Mainly causes confusion at first but tends to make people laugh."

juniorohio

Four times?

That's quite specific.

There's a story here, isn't there?

That's quite the claim.

"You’d never go back to women."

rogerofdale

I'm okay in this regard but thanks!

Next time someone tells you to go f*ck yourself, you'll be prepared, won't you?

Or just throw back another f*ck you or some other variation.

It's the most versatile swear word in the English language, after all.

Have some suggestions of your own? Feel free to tell us more in the comments below!

Want to "know" more?

Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.

Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again.

When visiting any foreign country, one should always be familiar with the laws and customs of the land.

After all, what might be generally accepted on your home turf, might be frowned upon, if not illegal, elsewhere.

For that matter, even locals might need a refresher course on what they can and can't do while at home.

Keep reading...Show less

Who doesn't love a good joke?

And one needn't be a professional comedian to always have a joke in their back pocket to make people laugh.

Particularly as there are certain types of jokes which are almost always guaranteed to elicit at least a tiny chuckle.

They could be knock-knock jokes, "little johnny" jokes, and of course the "yo mamma" jokes.

Though always teetering on the boundaries of good taste, the possibilities of jokingly insulting the mother of a friend, or foe, are endless, and more often than not, hilarious.

Keep reading...Show less
People Break Down Which TV Shows No One Else Seems To Remember
Possessed Photography/Unsplash

As a kid, I remember being obsessed (like obsessed) with David the Gnome and his fox Swift. I was tuned in daily to watch the adventures, get all misty eyed for the hurt animals the gnomes saved, and sobbed in abject wonder when the gnomes finally lived all 400 years of their gnome life and transitioned into the trees that make up the woods they live in.

The trees are their ancestors, y'all! The treeees! They protect the trees because they're family. Trees grow intertwined because they were so in love when they were gnomes.

Fam! This show was everything ... except memorable for other people because I was in my 30s talking to someone from another country before I met the first person who remembered this show.

Which, honestly, is kind of insulting to gnomes and trees.

Keep reading...Show less