There are few feelings worse than when someone goes out of their way to insult you.
In fact, what might be the only thing that feels worse is when someone insults you accidentally or without realizing it.
This might happen when someone assumes you're on your way to a costume party based on your choice of clothes or laughing upon hearing your middle name on the assumption it must be a joke.
When in fact you went to great pains to choose said outfit and were most definitely not kidding about your middle name.
Redditor IrohsFavoriteTea was eager to hear some of the most unfortunate accidental insults, leading them to ask:
"What is the worst insult you've suffered from someone who didn't even mean it as an insult?"
Wait for them to share the news...
“'You’re pregnant?!'”
“'No'”
"'Are you sure?'”
"Never wore that dress again."- ExcellentFormal4261
So comforting to know what your parents think about you
"When I was a teen, my dad told me he heard of an athlete who wrote a book about how he used to be bullied when he was young, how he was the school's loser and had no friends."
"'Exactly like you', my dad added."
"What a way to advertise a book to me, thanks dad!"- Baphee
Um, I'm right here!
"I did nude figure modeling for painting classes for extra cash in college about 15 years ago."
"One of the students was having trouble capturing my likeness and called the teacher over for help."
"The teacher: 'well - she has an unremarkable, normal face with no strong features, which is much more difficult to paint'.”
"I mean, they’re not wrong from a painting point of view - but nothing like quietly dying inside, fully naked with an audience."- kettleofhawks
Can't help feeling like a "nobody"...
"One of my in laws walked in when I was the only one in the house and, looking straight at me, said 'Oh, there‘s no one here'.”
"And… turned and left."- Mirabolis
Used to be?...
"Childhood friend from school turned coworker."
“'Yeah you used to be really smart!'”
"I had dropped out of college and we were working as bartenders at a restaurant, were talking about plans for the coming year or two and I had mentioned trying to get a new job/go back to school."
"I died a little/a lot."
"They were trying to be supportive, and were immediately horrified and apologized but yeah."- AlericandAmadeus
Do I need to show my ID?... I really don't mind...
"I started getting asked if I qualified for a senior discount in my 40s…"- FunnyNameHere02
Aging Jamie Lee Curtis GIFGiphyUm, thank you?
"'You look like you own ferrets'."
"I don't even know what that means but it was 4 years ago Hailey and I still remember."- memeking_69
How many ways to express your love...
"When i proposed to my wife she said 'I guess I can’t say no'."
"But she meant to say 'how can I say no'."
"She also had a panic attack the first time we kissed."- _chasls
Kids LITERALLY say the darndest things...
"Kids are the best for this."
"'Daddy, why don't you use your weights any more?'"
"'Is it because you got fat?'"- blimpcitybbq
Not Bad Kids Say The Darndest Things GIF by CBSGiphyThanks... I guess?
"A good friend’s girlfriend told me, 'I love how not girly you are and how you don’t care about how you look!'"
"I think she genuinely meant it as a compliment, but both of those things were news to me…"- angerilla
What are you implying, exactly?
"My cousin came to my house when I was playing on my PC, he just said 'get outta the cave dragon'."
" Sounds better in Portuguese."
"That was a little sharp, ngl."- randompopatoe
Of all the comparisons...
“Y'ou have a cute laugh it’s like a hyenas'."
"My childhood friend."
"We were in fifth grade."
"I was so upset I didn’t talk to him for a week."- NBsub
The Lion King Lol GIFGiphyBack handed compliment...
"My ex best friend told me 'if you weren't such a good person you would be easier to forget'."
"Like?? Thanks? "
"Are you trying to forget me?"- unluckyunnoticed
Tell me something I don't know.
"How about the opposite? "
"My mother teasing me for being a '30 year old virgin' a few years ago."
"Not realizing I'm Ace and have no desire to."- SnooDrawings1480
Thanks for rubbing it in...
"Now it's not so insulting, but back then it was."
"I was 11 or 12 and visiting family."
"I have a cousin who is autistic and we were hanging out and she asked me why I have bug bites all over my face."
"She said it innocently but I had horrible, painful acne when I was a kid so I was pretty sensitive about it."
"Ruined my mood for the rest of the trip."- morgannemary
Acne Zit GIF by Adult SwimGiphyOffense taken!
"My friend and I were trying on dresses."
"She picked out a really short dress for me."
"I didn't want my a** out wearing it, so I stated 'I don't think that would work, I don't want my a** hanging out'."
"She states 'no offense but you don't really have an a**, you're giving yourself too much credit'."
"It stung."
"Not what I meant but ok."- lookylookielilcookie·
"What baby?"
"7 year old daughters best friend had a birthday party a week ago."
"I haven’t met this best friends family yet so we did introductions and all that but the grandma kept saying something about the pregnant lady."
"Like when I would get in the pool to swim with the kids and she’d be able to get out she’d say 'go easy kids, the pregnant lady is on drowning patrol, grandmas tired!'"
"So after a few of those comments I said 'oh haha I'm not pregnant I'm just fat' while holding my 2 year old son."
"She was super embarrassed and insisted I told her I was pregnant."
"I was like hmm I didn’t say that but maybe you just heard that when I said something else?"
"Idk lol."
"I don’t even look pregnant and I’m not even that fat at all so I’m just confused at her unintentional insult."- censoredlass
But how do you really feel?
"Girl best friend: I'm just looking at the persons character if I want to date them."
"Me: So uhm you wanna go on a date?"
"Girl best friend: You have the most beautiful character but you ain't my type, sorry."
"Okay thank you."- AngryPuma_
sad episode 14 GIFGiphyBackfired...
"'It's okay. You did your best!'"
"I had very purposely not done my best, but she didn't know that, and it kinda sucked that she thought that was all I could do."
"Knowing the kind of person she was, I know she would never mean to offend me, but dang."
"If you're wondering why I purposely didn't do my best."
"We were in gym class in middle school."
"Our coach wanted us to run back and forth across the gym until we got too tired."
"Last person running won something, don't remember what."
"I knew I wouldn't win, and I get a pretty bad runners stitch, so I just pretended to be out of breath early on so it wouldn't actually get to that point."- fishwantme
Of course complimenting someone on their new haircut, dress for a special occasion, or big news is always the right thing to do.
But those who are wise always remember to think before they speak.
So one should always think very clearly as to what exactly they are about to compliment...
Or be prepared to open your mouth before your foot reaches it.
Redditor JesseB342 was eager to hear examples of when a tiny bit of internet fame resulted in an expanded ego, leading them to ask:
"What’s the smallest amount of internet fame / clout that you’ve seen go to someone’s head?'
Blink and you'll miss them.
"Friend was in a video at a car meet that went viral back say 2011-2012."
"He said like 8 words and couldn’t see him but you could hear him."
"He would go around telling people after he is 'famous' for being in a viral YouTube video."
"I was like 'if you have to announce you are famous, you might not be as famous as you think Broski'."- HoneyMussy4goodBoy
It made the movie!
"My dad's collection of vintage drinking glasses were used in 'The Mothman Prophecies'."
"His glasses made the movie much better.:
"Just ask him, he'll tell you."- cleonavarro
Anyone remember MySpace?
"I made a fairly successful MySpace type quiz once.'
'Over a million people took it. I put that on my resume.''- effieokay
Social Media Hearts GIF by Flamingo ServicesGiphy"Remember when I did that thing? No? Well, you should!"
"A guy from my hometown who was sort of a skeezeball helped some elderly folks escape a fire."
'The act itself was commendable and he deserved the recognition he received in local media and he went viral for a week or two."
'But uh….5 plus years after the fact he was still using that as a way to try to get out of tickets or being cut off at the local bars after refusing to pay tabs."
"My brother encountered his Instagram recently and his self-description says something like 'Unspoken hero, DM me for details."
"lmao.'- FartAttack911
Fame can't get you everything.
"I work for a company that books luxury travel, think $20,000 packages."
"A woman contacted us wanting a free trip in exchange for posting it on her blog, proudly proclaiming that she had 800 followers."
"My coworkers' dog photo account has more followers."- AnastasiaSheppard
Even if he's not wrong.
"That dude telling Keanu Reeves that he's breathtaking."
"He would later comment on other stuff whenever breathtaking was mentioned, as if he was the one that came up with the word and made it his thing."- Sir_MoonDoggy
Keanu Reeves Reaction GIFGiphyBig ego making up for other shortcomings?...
"The guy from TikTok dancing in that parade to 'I’m just thinking with my d*ck'.”
"He went home to Indianapolis and started doing meet and greets with people at local car dealerships lol."- jkaycola
It happens to the best of us...
"I entered a blog competition to my uni the summer before I started.'
"I won, and myself and two others were given a free laptop on the understanding we'd keep publishing blogs as 'Insiders' for the uni to use as a marketing tool."
"I put one up a week, and enjoyed it."
"They were decently entertaining and linked to on the uni website, but probably got no more than a few dozen reads."
"On my birthday a few months into the year the bouncers at a club wouldn't let me in as I appeared too drunk."
"I got into a pedantic argument with them about whether the pavement was public property or not, then shouted at them I was going to write about it in my Uni-sanctioned blog."
"I woke up hungover the next day and did not write about the incident in my uni-sanctioned blog."- Fascinatedwithfire
It's one way of putting yourself out there...
"Any amount of sound cloud rappers that get a few hundred views and a few mates gassing them up and think they've found their calling."
"Source, I have to produce them."
"Money is money tho."- EddieHxtler
urban hip hop GIFGiphyBad sportsmanship will never pay off...
"Back in the day when I played Wow there was a guy on my server who had a tiny amount of name recognition."
"He was good at the game and spent a lot of time and energy organizing things."
"People on the server knew him and would ask for his help, or show him deference in order to get his attention on things."
"One day he put together an optional raid and at the end of the raid a particularly rare item dropped."
"Instead of an open roll - which was the standard at the time - he simply gave the item to his friend."
'When people complained, he said something like, 'I'm so and so, I'm the most important raid leader on this server, you're all lucky to even be here right now, so shut up and deal with it'."
'Well screenshots were taken and links were sent around."
"Dude ended up transferring off the server less than a week later because nobody would give him the time of day."- shaidyn
We all like being recognized for an accomplishment.
But rather than let fame get to our heads, it's important to use that fame for good.
Particularly if you can reach as many as 100 followers to make a difference.
Reddit user u/MediocrePNumber6 asked:
"What's the biggest bachelor/bachelorette party or wedding night f**k up you have seen?"
20.
Myself and some mates went paintballing a few years ago and the other team was the groomsmen from a wedding happening the next day, all went well but at the end of the game the paintball host said "showdown between groom and best man" so they go back to back and walk 5 paces and shoot eachother but the best man shot him on the neck and it looked like the biggest hickey ever so id say it was fun to try explain that!
19.
I was at my uncles fiancés bachelorette party. The next morning we wake up and her engagement ring is missing. Her drunk brain reasoned it was safer to take her ring off to wash her hands in the club but she never put it back on after. We tried calling the place but they never found it. Probably made worse by the fact the ring was the grooms mothers engagement ring and she had picked him out of her 7 sons to take the ring for his fiancé. The groom was very cool about it and she felt really bad but they ended up having to get a lookalike for the wedding a few weeks later.
They're still married years later with kids so it's a happy ending.
18.
My buddy's bucks weekend was after the wedding. We partied in a hotel room for the night then met the bride and her party the next day to stay and party at a house for a few nights.. first night we got super hammered at the hotel, place got totally destroyed, tried to order a stripper to the room, instead a hooker showed up, no one wanted to have sex with her and she didn't speak much English so we had to pay her $400 to leave. Groom fell over on the hotel room floor that was covered in broken glass.. in the morning the groom disappears to a brothel..at the house all the strip joints that we called (it was a lot) to try and get a stripper we're calling back, new wife finds out, takes off the ring and gives it back to the groom.. very awkward. They are still married with two kids.
17.
My best man fell down some steps at a strip club. Another dude picked him up, but his foot must have been wedged under the stair. One almighty crunch later he was back on his drunken feet, only to wake up to this the next day.
16.
We had a big going away party for one of my buddies, as with all groups of soldiers - the night ended at the strip club (yeah I know). Anyways, one of the guys just happened to have gotten married earlier that day. He decided that rather than going home with his lovely bride on their wedding night, he would rather come with us while she went home.
They just announced they're getting divorced, it's been 2 months.
15.
GiphyWe are Greek-Americans. And not many Greeks actually break plates at weddings. But this bride insisted on breaking plates. So people are dancing and others are breaking plates by their feet. The bride (and others) are kneeling in a circle clapping around the people dancing.. and all the plates being thrown.
And as you could guess, a piece hit the bride in the face right under her eye and she started gushing blood all over. Her dress looks like it's out of a horror film. It took a while for the tiny nick to stop bleeding. But it was scary seeing her just start bleeding like that.
14.
Was at a bachelor party years ago, early 20s, for a friend and he got a private room with a stripper and had sex with her. Don't talk to him anymore for other reasons such as him being dead but the marriage fell apart pretty quick
13.
My BIL went go karting for his bachelor's. Came off, face planted, gravel rash all down the side of his face right before the wedding.
He went to hospital and got it bandaged. The dressings didn't come off until the morning of. 100% healed. Doctor was impressed and he lived to the honeymoon.
12.
A friend of mine worked as a bartender and told me that this 26 y/o girl was celebrating her bachelorette party when she saw a video of her fiancé having sex with another woman at his bachelor party. For almost an hour he had to act as this girl's therapist until she stumbled off into the night still depressed at the way things turned out.
11.
Wedding videographer here. I have full on seen people get married, sign the paperwork, and the dude goes off to gave sex with a bridesmaid the wedding night. It's honestly impressive how little time it takes to end that marriage.
10.
My old boss cheated on his bachelor party night, swore all his friends to secrecy, went through with the wedding then told her on the first night of their honeymoon out of guilt. Married and split up within 1 week!
9.
GiphyBuddy smashed his face on the first night. He passed out in the hotel wearing socks. Got up to go to the bathroom and slipped on the marble floor. His teeth went through his mouth. Blood everywhere. We called hotel staff to help. EMTs came, and two of us took him to an emergency dentist. He ended up leaving the next day. Worst parts: $8k in dental work, had to have his jaw wired shut, and was scheduled for his first day at a new job three days after the accident.
8.
I used to strip at bachelorette parties. Some brides to be were way too physical in ways I sometimes wondered if marriage at that point was a good idea for them.
7.
My gf went on one where they got a party bus. Everyone was drunk before getting on. They just drove around the town we live in after picking up all the guests (about a 20min drive gets you from one side to the other on a slow day). The toilet on the bus broke early on then started overflowing as people kept using it even after being told not to. 2 people had asthma attacks as they were allowed smoke on the bus but windows didnt open enough to ventilate for 15+ people smoking like trains. 1 person passed out and woke up only to projectile vomit all over the place.
Fights broke out after onboard alcohol supply ran out gf demanded to be dropped home as due to all the smoke her chest became heavily irritated and she couldnt ignore the smell of the busted toilet any longer. She got dropped off and then 2 people off the bus came to our door with her demanding I give them extra alcohol then trying to guilt me by saying its a gift for the happy couple (I planned their entire wedding for free and paid for the dj as a gift) so I just laughed and said no.
A month later they got married (the couple got alot of praise for having such a wonderful wedding on such a budget). 4 months later filed for divorce after one's drug habit came to light along with both realising they were cheating rings around each other.
6.
While smoking outside groom (brother of my fiancé at the time) started hitting on me and wanted to get a blow job off me - literally took his junk out etc. Apologised promptly and put it back after seeing my reaction, saying he's too drunk and excited. But then again, he has been cheating on his wife-to-be throughout their entire relationships, so not a big surprise he did it on their wedding night too. Just never thought it would be with me, I thought siblings partners are off limits for everyone no matter what!
5.
GiphyI have the opposite sort of story, my friend "rented" a sloth and had a very quiet party were they fed it sweet potatoes. It was apparently fun and cute.
The sloth came from a conservation organization and you can pay for a "sloth experience" in your home where a guy comes over with the sloth and you hang out for a while.
4.
Totally caused by ME. Drank too much free Champagne (son of a heart surgeon was groom) and I got chucked out of the reception for saying out loud the groom's sister was ugly. Got ousted from the friend group. Totally deserved, I was out of order and extremely drunk.
3.
A worked in a small family restaurant/pub in my small college town while i was in undergrad. We were the classiest "bar" in town, so we had a surprising number of bachelor/bachelorette parties come through. In one particularly bad incident i remember, we were the last stop at the end of a daytime bachelorette party.
They had toured a bunch of wineries/breweries, and most of the participants were trashed by the time they got there (around 4 PM). As soon as they walked in, the bride-to-be disappeared to the bathroom. A few minutes later, we noticed a lot of water begin streaming out under the door. She had puked everywhere, and somehow in the process RIPPED THE SINK OUT OF THE WALL!!! The icing on the cake, her mother in law had to carry her vomit covered butt out of the restaurant. We ended up having to shut down for a few days in order to repair the damage.
2.
Had a distant cousin get arrested on the way into the church to get married.
Credit to the bride. She said it's all paid for let's party. It became an impromptu family reunion. They had the jp marry them a week later
1.
Nothing worse than when one of the friends to the groom had a massive drunken meltdown over the fact that we weren't going to a strip club. Ugly crying and everything.
