There is nothing wrong with sex work.
Sex work is real work.
Which is why I've always wondered... why do strip clubs have to be so gross?
But the hygiene is probably the tip of the crazy stories when it comes to strip clubs.
RedditorNomadFourFivewanted to hear about what happens behind closed doors in the places where the clothes come off. They asked:
"What is the worst thing you’ve seen at a strip club?"
One of the very few times I've been to a strip bar, the buffet was not a good choice.
"I was at a place in a poorer Rust Belt town. Girl comes up to us, pulls a baggie with a white powder out of it, throws it onto the table and says 'I have to sell this for my boyfriend tonight. You interested?' We said no and she grabbed said bag and continued on her mission."
Too Much Seen
"I saw my first dead body at a club in East Dallas. Story was, a girl that worked there set a guy up to get robbed. He found out, hit her in the head with a beer bucket and a fight ensued among several patrons. I assume most of them didn't know the reason she was hit and just fought the guy. One of those people was a regular."
"As the almost robbed guy left the club, the regular threw a beer bottle at his head. Almost robbed guy steps out of his car, walks up, pulls out a gun and dropped him at point-blank range right in front of the club's entrance/exit. He returned to his car and wasn't found by police for several months."
"Saw a guy get his penis broken. At this one club they'd bring guys up on stage, strap them to a chair next to the pole and the girls would take turns sliding down it really hard and fast and landing on his crotch. Basically a way of hazing a guy for his birthday, bachelor party or similar occasion. Somehow the girls did it so that it probably looked worse than it was. Except one time... Not sure what went wrong, but when the third girl slid down, he yelled out in pain. 15 minutes later he left in an ambulance."
Good MondayOld Man Smile GIF by F*CK, THAT'S DELICIOUSGiphy
"Old dude on an oxygen tank, smoking. He turned toward the crowd and with the two teeth he had left, he spat out, 'Ya-kin see ‘er t**s.' Solid Monday night."
Goodness. What in the world. Can't people just watch the show?
SimplicityMeryl Streep GIFGiphy
"Ankle monitoring bracelet on... and heels… and that’s it."
"Saw a girl climbing up the pole and she was strong. She could climb that thing fast. Until she hit the bolts holding to the ceiling with her head. She came down even faster and her head was bleeding bad. Ambulance was called and she took a ride."
"I once saw that done right. She climbed up the pole and when she got to the top she disappeared into the rafters like a raccoon. A moment later she reappeared upside down, legs around the pole, then did a dead drop and stopped herself inches from the bottom using nothing but her thighs."
"I went to the local ratty strip club with some buddies. I didn't really want to be there but it was somewhere to party after the bars closed. I got to talking to a woman in her 40's in a nurses outfit. She told me she was wearing it because her daughter is going to nursing school and she's working there to pay for it."
"She then tells me she's paying for it to get closer to her daughter since she just got out of prison for putting a hit out on her husband. The guy the hit man went after attacked the wrong person and got arrested. Snitched on her. I was too sober to be dealing with all that haha."
"My 19th birthday (legal in Canada) went to the strip club for the first time. This one dancer was so sick. She coughed and blew her nose through the whole set. She looked miserable. She was obviously off her game. She was getting no reaction from the crowd. My buddies and I tipped her really well since we felt so bad for her."
"A stripper pulling her panties to the side and rubbing her butt up and down my face. When I told another dancer, she said 'Oh yeah. That’s Candice, she does that.'"
"A Club in Niagara Falls Canada has the seamstress who fixes the g-strings and outfits set up in the ladies bathroom. This poor old woman works all night in a stinky bathroom, so wrong."
"Group of us dad bros got dragged to a club by the one last guy getting married. We had some drinks and a buddy ripped the brand new button down off a friend. Before we can say anything the strippers at the table were down collecting the buttons. All they said was, 'we’ve got a girl. $40 and 20 minutes later his shirt came back good as new.'"
"A stripper crying and being consoled by other strippers because no one was asking her for lap dances... it was all a bit too real. It was my 18th birthday and first ever strip club experience.. it put me off them for good."
The GuyElmo Hello GIF by Sesame StreetGiphy
"I went and with a friend one time for just a normal evening. Halfway through the evening his expression went from 'being a guy in a strip club,' to like he just seen something horrible. To find out his mom was actually up on the stage. He never knew what she did at night because he lived with his dad."
I'll never forget it...
"I worked for a beverage company in my early 20's, we delivered pop and bar mix to night clubs/ peelers and restaurants. Met a lot of dancers. A lot of them were smart college girls that made great money when they weren't in class or doing homework. There was the opposite side of that coin and some were doing it to support their habits. One of the poorer establishments in the far reaches of the area catered to a lower crowd."
"There was a problem with one of the juice guns so I was working behind the bar for a bit. The place had a very small corner stage and a woman wearing clothes that didn't fit got up on the stage. She was clearly wasted , had a black eye and was covered in bruises. The pole was her support while she was standing (dancing) and she tried to swing around on it with one hand . Her grip slipped and she fell off the stage and face planted on the floor."
"The staff, the patrons. Everyone saw it and no one did anything for what seemed like forever. The bar was on the opposite side of the room and I had to tell a waitress to do something. They picked her up and took her into the back. It was completely bizarre. I'll never forget it."
"It's a toss-up between the pregnant (7-8 months) stripper smoking and drinking alcohol, or the stripper giving lap dances to her aunt, then her uncle, then her 17 yo cousin while only wearing a g-string."
"In Vegas. I see a guy walk in. Purchased 2 drinks. Slams them. Walks down to the stage. Pulls out a wrinkled 1 dollar bill from his pocket. Wraps it around his pointer finger and proceeds to cram it up the stripper on stages a**. Turns around and walks out. Never to be seen again."
"Stripper had previously had a breast implant rupture and had to have it removed. I guess she couldn't afford a new one so when she danced she always had her hair draped over that side to try to hide the deflated beast. Queens strip club near Vancouver, it's gone now I think."
"I was out with my buddy in college and he saw his younger sister’s best friend on stage (he had no idea she was a stripper and had grown up with her), took his jacket and tried to cover her up. The bouncers swarmed in and almost beat his a**. Was more comical than anything and he tried to give her a lecture as she was collecting tips and killed the vibe."
This is why we should stay at home. Safe.