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Women Break Down Their Ideal First Dates

First dates can be a lot of pressure. You barely know the person you’re going out with, and maybe you’ve talked a bit in person, but this is the first time you’re going to be with them one-on-one for an extended period of time.

The activity can make or break a first date.

Sometimes, a relationship that could’ve been really special never even starts because the first date was bad.

I like to walk around New York City on dates, and duck into whatever store or restaurant looks interesting. It’s a good way to get to do something you’ve always wanted to but never had a chance to (on one of my first dates, walking around the city led us to get our fortunes told), and it’s a great way to get to know the other person.

The women of Reddit have their own ideas on what an ideal first date would be, and they’re ready to share!

It all started when Redditor PhantomHydraPH asked:

“Girls of Reddit, what would be your ideal first date?”

The Supernatural Treatment

"Beer followed by ghost hunting and then ending the date at 8am over crappy diner breakfast."

– SeattleCoffeeRoast

Just Keep Moving

"Early on we had what my wife refers to as the epic date. Started with lunch, then a movie, then rock climbing, then dinner, then swing dancing, then back to her place. Was like 12 hours total. Figured anyone that could up with me that much was a keeper."

– Dyolf_Knip

The Great Escape

"A guy actually took me to do an escape room on the first date. It was actually pretty cool because not only was it an activity where we had something to focus on/break the ice, but was able to gauge how we would solve problems together right off the bat. Didn't work out with the guy past the second date but I always thought as far as first dates go it was a pretty good idea!"

"Bonus: weren't able to have our phones in the escape room so no distractions. Also they take a picture of your escape room group after so if the relationship worked out you have a cute pic from your first date :)"

– Successful-Income-22

""If we don't succeed, we'll have to be TOGETHER FOREVER!!!""

– ImpracticallySharp

Time For A Getaway

"Something casual that doesn’t have a big time commitment. Drinks, coffee, ice cream, or lunch/dinner"

– Appropriate_Tea9048

"I took my now girlfriend to a rooftop bar for drinks and apps. Spent the entire night talking. It was super chill and casual , it didn't feel like a date."

– Zomb1stuv

"Hey so - yeah, that worked for me. We did like a 7 or 8:00 coffee and dessert chill get together at a place that I knew of that well, had really good both. That was my last ever 2nd date, been together 12 years now."

"Its all upsides as far as I'm concerned: No pressure of a full dinner or anything, less formal, also some people are self conscious about what they order or eat in front of another person so it kind of eliminates that anxiety. The place itself is a conversation catalyst - if you pick someplace kind of neat, notice things about it, talk about what you like and don't like. If you've never been there before, "hey check this out" comes up a lot, or "hey, I've been here before and this one thing was *amazing* or "I've been wanting to try this since last time I was here" and all that."

"I should preface by saying that wasn't our FIRST first date, our first one was I met up with two and two of her friends someplace. First off, I left a good impression by not being surprised or mad she brought friends. We met online. You don't know anything about me but what I've told you, I totally get that you don't want to meet a guy alone for the first time. I managed to keep the whole both entertained for a while before it was time to head out."

"Lets keep this rolling: 2nd date should be something fun, not necessarily evening. For example every Saturday in the summer our town has a Riverfront Market with tons of vendor booths, food trucks, its pet friendly, farmers market stuff, live music and all that. Great place to just walk around and browse, grab a coffee or a pretzel, and just see what's going on. You still have something to *do* together so you're less likely to stall and feel on the spot, and you can get a feel for their interests and personality walking around in a place like that. See what they comment on or show interest in, and they can do the same. Its even better if you run into people you know."

– sohcgt96

Be Seen

"Somewhere public, but not crowded or organized. Like a fair or a festival where we can just walk around and chat and maybe go on a ride or play some games. I like rollercoasters so if you are close to an amusement park of some kind that'd be nice. It's going to differ for each woman though, I'm more wild and fun-loving!"

– TheTurbulentTeacher

"Somewhere public, but not crowded or organized"

"So not an MLM recruiting seminar. Got it."

– ncconch

Healthy Competition

"Putt putt! I think some type of activity with a little competition is a fun way to break the ice. Putt putt requires some skill but a lot is also luck so anyone can do it."

– summoe

"That sounds fun. I enjoy games."

– OriginalDarkDagger

"Something mildly competitive but mostly just fun, like going to an arcade, or one of those axe/knife throwing places, bowling or something like that. Then drinks and a bite. But really, if someone actually thought out ahead of time a plan to take me anywhere and then did it I’d be psyched no matter what we did."

– petrichor-punk


"On the first date, I do a identification check, résumé check, credit check, diploma/certification check, and a charge for my time. It’s crazy out there and those platforms lie."

– Likeitisouthere


"Whatever you do, don't take a girl on a "mystery surpise date!" that ends up being a nude beach, and then ask her to film you nakedly frolicking in the sea. This should not be followed up by a lunch at Panda Express where you give her very detailed stories of your (limited but bizarre) sexual encounters. Also, do not drag her to a Best Buy store after lunch so you can watch free TV on the displays."

"(I never again allowed a guy to pick me up for a date 👀)"

– fancifulsnails

"Oh my god, I am laughing but crying at the same time because yeah, how about NO! Does NO! work for you?"

"Also, always have your own transportation for a date in case you need to leave for reasons."

– eddyathome

Do Something

"Yea bowling, museum, then some food and talking is the way. As I have a bit of a hard time opening up with people, when it's just sitting across from each other the whole time. Need a bit of an activity, to loosen things up a bit. Also interesting to see if they are a sore loser, or willing to share techniques on how to do something. Just small ways, to see more about the person's character. As opposed to eating first and wondering if the other person, is putting on a front for you or not."

– LurkingAintEazy

"I agree with this. It should be casually competitive and random. Axe throwing would be fun."

– Burrito_Loyalist

Just One Date

"Drinks and a chat in a random pub, where we’ll play pool and I will demonstrate how cool and breezy I am and then to a gig where I will proceed to show you how uncool I actually am and then we fall in love so I never have to go on a first date again"

– NinetysRoyalty

Simple Works Too

"Married lady here, my first date with my now-husband was going to see a movie we both knew would be kinda bad, then grabbing drinks and a quick bite at a casual restaurant across the street."

"First dates don't have to be fancy, you don't need to pull out all these stops to woo the lady or ~sweep her off her feet~, you just have to be good company. It's all about the connection, not how much you spend or how romantic you make it."

"Also, just a bit of advice, a first date should always always always be in public, with other people around. Not a hangout at your place, and not a walk in the woods."

– VisualCelery

Stop And Smell The Roses

"Botanical garden!"

– yuzuandgin

"I’m liking this one. I’m convinced a botanical garden would force everyone to focus on the plants, weather, surroundings, etc. And in my experience, everyone’s living this hectic go-go lifestyle that it’s really lovely to see someone stop and admire plants, their leaves, etc. I’ve gone to a few botanical gardens, and the amount of times I’ve gotten caught up in smelling a flower or comparing my hand to the size of a humongous leaf, it’s fun! Also, one of the most attractive men I ever met would really stop in his tracks to admire the skyline and his surroundings, and his responses were genuine. Caught me off guard..."

– JminusRomeo

"I also like this. I love taking pictures of nature walking alone at a leisurely pace. If I found someone who also enjoyed this, that'd be more fun. Maybe they'd suggest a photo I would have thought of. They'd probably be more relaxed in general as a person. It also means talking about nature. People who enjoy nature are usually pretty cool."

– eddyathome

Read, Read, Read!

“Did this once with an ex. Went to a bookstore, looked around at the books and talked about what we had read etc, then we went and had a drink at a nearby bar. Then, each of us briefly got up from the table went back to the bookstore and got a book for the other person that we thought they would like. And then we discussed why we thought they would like the book over those drinks. It was really fun.”

– WhoIsYerWan

“This is good because it shows the other person you actually listened to them and thought about them. Also, books.”

– eddyathome

“Also interchangeable with coffee if drinks are not an option.”

– WhoIsYerWan

“Two bookworms' shared dream eh?”

– youraveragemasochist

Books and coffee? Sign me up!

Do you have an ideas to add? Let us know in the comments below.

People Reveal The Weirdest Thing About Themselves

Reddit user Isitjustmedownhere asked: 'Give an example; how weird are you really?'

Let's get one thing straight: no one is normal. We're all weird in our own ways, and that is actually normal.

Of course, that doesn't mean we don't all have that one strange trait or quirk that outweighs all the other weirdness we possess.

For me, it's the fact that I'm almost 30 years old, and I still have an imaginary friend. Her name is Sarah, she has red hair and green eyes, and I strongly believe that, since I lived in India when I created her and there were no actual people with red hair around, she was based on Daphne Blake from Scooby-Doo.

I also didn't know the name Sarah when I created her, so that came later. I know she's not really there, hence the term 'imaginary friend,' but she's kind of always been around. We all have conversations in our heads; mine are with Sarah. She keeps me on task and efficient.

My mom thinks I'm crazy that I still have an imaginary friend, and writing about her like this makes me think I may actually be crazy, but I don't mind. As I said, we're all weird, and we all have that one trait that outweighs all the other weirdness.

Redditors know this all too well and are eager to share their weird traits.

It all started when Redditor Isitjustmedownhere asked:

"Give an example; how weird are you really?"

Monsters Under My Bed

"My bed doesn't touch any wall."

"Edit: I guess i should clarify im not rich."

– Practical_Eye_3600

"Gosh the monsters can get you from any angle then."

– bikergirlr7

"At first I thought this was a flex on how big your bedroom is, but then I realized you're just a psycho 😁"

– zenOFiniquity8

Can You See Why?

"I bought one of those super-powerful fans to dry a basement carpet. Afterwards, I realized that it can point straight up and that it would be amazing to use on myself post-shower. Now I squeegee my body with my hands, step out of the shower and get blasted by a wide jet of room-temp air. I barely use my towel at all. Wife thinks I'm weird."

– KingBooRadley


"In 1990 when I was 8 years old and bored on a field trip, I saw a black Oldsmobile Cutlass driving down the street on a hot day to where you could see that mirage like distortion from the heat on the road. I took a “snapshot” by blinking my eyes and told myself “I wonder how long I can remember this image” ….well."

– AquamarineCheetah

"Even before smartphones, I always take "snapshots" by blinking my eyes hoping I'll remember every detail so I can draw it when I get home. Unfortunately, I may have taken so much snapshots that I can no longer remember every detail I want to draw."

"Makes me think my "memory is full.""

– Reasonable-Pirate902

Same, Same

"I have eaten the same lunch every day for the past 4 years and I'm not bored yet."

– OhhGoood

"How f**king big was this lunch when you started?"

– notmyrealnam3

Not Sure Who Was Weirder

"Had a line cook that worked for us for 6 months never said much. My sous chef once told him with no context, "Baw wit da baw daw bang daw bang diggy diggy." The guy smiled, left, and never came back."

– Frostygrunt


"I pace around my house for hours listening to music imagining that I have done all the things I simply lack the brain capacity to do, or in some really bizarre scenarios, I can really get immersed in these imaginations sometimes I don't know if this is some form of schizophrenia or what."

– RandomSharinganUser

"I do the same exact thing, sometimes for hours. When I was young it would be a ridiculous amount of time and many years later it’s sort of trickled off into almost nothing (almost). It’s weird but I just thought it’s how my brain processes sh*t."

– Kolkeia

If Only

"Even as an adult I still think that if you are in a car that goes over a cliff; and right as you are about to hit the ground if you jump up you can avoid the damage and will land safely. I know I'm wrong. You shut up. I'm not crying."

– ShotCompetition2593

Pet Food

"As a kid I would snack on my dog's Milkbones."

– drummerskillit

"Haha, I have a clear memory of myself doing this as well. I was around 3 y/o. Needless to say no one was supervising me."

– Isitjustmedownhere

"When I was younger, one of my responsibilities was to feed the pet fish every day. Instead, I would hide under the futon in the spare bedroom and eat the fish food."

– -GateKeep-

My Favorite Subject

"I'm autistic and have always had a thing for insects. My neurotypical best friend and I used to hang out at this local bar to talk to girls, back in the late 90s. One time he claimed that my tendency to circle conversations back to insects was hurting my game. The next time we went to that bar (with a few other friends), he turned and said sternly "No talking about bugs. Or space, or statistics or other bullsh*t but mainly no bugs." I felt like he was losing his mind over nothing."

"It was summer, the bar had its windows open. Our group hit it off with a group of young ladies, We were all chatting and having a good time. I was talking to one of these girls, my buddy was behind her facing away from me talking to a few other people."

"A cloudless sulphur flies in and lands on little thing that holds coasters."

"Cue Jordan Peele sweating gif."

"The girl notices my tension, and asks if I am looking at the leaf. "Actually, that's a lepidoptera called..." I looked at the back of my friend's head, he wasn't looking, "I mean a butterfly..." I poked it and it spread its wings the girl says "oh that's a BUG?!" and I still remember my friend turning around slowly to look at me with chastisement. The ONE thing he told me not to do."

"I was 21, and was completely not aware that I already had a rep for being an oddball. It got worse from there."

– Phormicidae

*Teeth Chatter*

"I bite ice cream sometimes."


"That's how I am with popsicles. My wife shudders every single time."


Never Speak Of This

"I put ice in my milk."


"You should keep that kind of thing to yourself. Even when asked."

– We-R-Doomed

"There's some disturbing sh*t in this thread, but this one takes the cake."

– RatonaMuffin

More Than Super Hearing

"I can hear the television while it's on mute."

– Tira13e

"What does it say to you, child?"

– Mama_Skip


"I put mustard on my omelettes."

– Deleted User


– NotCrustOr-filling

Evened Up

"Whenever I say a word and feel like I used a half of my mouth more than the other half, I have to even it out by saying the word again using the other half of my mouth more. If I don't do it correctly, that can go on forever until I feel it's ok."

"I do it silently so I don't creep people out."

– LesPaltaX

"That sounds like a symptom of OCD (I have it myself). Some people with OCD feel like certain actions have to be balanced (like counting or making sure physical movements are even). You should find a therapist who specializes in OCD, because they can help you."

– MoonlightKayla

I totally have the same need for things to be balanced! Guess I'm weird and a little OCD!

Close up face of a woman in bed, staring into the camera
Photo by Jen Theodore

Experiencing death is a fascinating and frightening idea.

Who doesn't want to know what is waiting for us on the other side?

But so many of us want to know and then come back and live a little longer.

It would be so great to be sure there is something else.

But the whole dying part is not that great, so we'll have to rely on other people's accounts.

Redditor AlaskaStiletto wanted to hear from everyone who has returned to life, so they asked:

"Redditors who have 'died' and come back to life, what did you see?"


Happy Good Vibes GIF by Major League SoccerGiphy

"My dad's heart stopped when he had a heart attack and he had to be brought back to life. He kept the paper copy of the heart monitor which shows he flatlined. He said he felt an overwhelming sensation of peace, like nothing he had felt before."



"I had surgical complications in 2010 that caused a great deal of blood loss. As a result, I had extremely low blood pressure and could barely stay awake. I remember feeling like I was surrounded by loved ones who had passed. They were in a circle around me and I knew they were there to guide me onwards. I told them I was not ready to go because my kids needed me and I came back."

"My nurse later said she was afraid she’d find me dead every time she came into the room."

"It took months, and blood transfusions, but I recovered."


Take Me Back

"Overwhelming peace and happiness. A bright airy and floating feeling. I live a very stressful life. Imagine finding out the person you have had a crush on reveals they have the same feelings for you and then you win the lotto later that day - that was the feeling I had."

"I never feared death afterward and am relieved when I hear of people dying after suffering from an illness."



The Light Minnie GIF by (G)I-DLEGiphy

"I had a heart surgery with near-death experience, for me at least (well the possibility that those effects are caused by morphine is also there) I just saw black and nothing else but it was warm and I had such inner peace, its weird as I sometimes still think about it and wish this feeling of being so light and free again."


This is why I hate surgery.

You just never know.



"More of a near-death experience. I was electrocuted. I felt like I was in a deep hole looking straight up in the sky. My life flashed before me. Felt sad for my family, but I had a deep sense of peace."



"Nursing in the ICU, we’ve had people try to die on us many times during the years, some successfully. One guy stood out to me. His heart stopped. We called a code, are working on him, and suddenly he comes to. We hadn’t vented him yet, so he was able to talk, and he started screaming, 'Don’t let them take me, don’t let them take me, they are coming,' he was scared and yelling."

"Then he yelled a little more, as we tried to calm him down, he screamed, 'No, No,' and gestured towards the end of the bed, and died again. We didn’t get him back. It was seriously creepy. We called his son to tell him the news, and the son said basically, 'Good, he was an SOB.'”



"My sister died and said it was extremely peaceful. She said it was very loud like a train station and lots of talking and she was stuck in this area that was like a curtain with lots of beautiful colors (colors that you don’t see in real life according to her) a man told her 'He was sorry, but she had to go back as it wasn’t her time.'"


"I had a really similar experience except I was in an endless garden with flowers that were colors I had never seen before. It was quiet and peaceful and a woman in a dress looked at me, shook her head, and just said 'Not yet.' As I was coming back, it was extremely loud, like everyone in the world was trying to talk all at once. It was all very disorienting but it changed my perspective on life!"


The Fog

"I was in a gray fog with a girl who looked a lot like a young version of my grandmother (who was still alive) but dressed like a pioneer in the 1800s she didn't say anything but kept pulling me towards an opening in the wall. I kept refusing to go because I was so tired."

"I finally got tired of her nagging and went and that's when I came to. I had bled out during a c-section and my heart could not beat without blood. They had to deliver the baby and sew up the bleeders. refill me with blood before they could restart my heart so, like, at least 12 minutes gone."


Through the Walls

"My spouse was dead for a couple of minutes one miserable night. She maintains that she saw nothing, but only heard people talking about her like through a wall. The only thing she remembers for absolute certain was begging an ER nurse that she didn't want to die."

"She's quite alive and well today."


Well let's all be happy to be alive.

It seems to be all we have.

Man's waist line
Santhosh Vaithiyanathan/Unsplash

Trying to lose weight is a struggle understood by many people regardless of size.

The goal of reaching a healthy weight may seem unattainable, but with diet and exercise, it can pay off through persistence and discipline.

Seeing the pounds gradually drop off can also be a great motivator and incentivize people to stay the course.

Those who've achieved their respective weight goals shared their experiences when Redditor apprenti8455 asked:

"People who lost a lot of weight, what surprises you the most now?"

Redditors didn't see these coming.

Shiver Me Timbers

"I’m always cold now!"

– Telrom_1

"I had a coworker lose over 130 pounds five or six years ago. I’ve never seen him without a jacket on since."

– r7ndom

"140 lbs lost here starting just before COVID, I feel like that little old lady that's always cold, damn this top comment was on point lmao."

– mr_remy

Drawing Concern

"I lost 100 pounds over a year and a half but since I’m old(70’s) it seems few people comment on it because (I think) they think I’m wasting away from some terminal illness."

– dee-fondy

"Congrats on the weight loss! It’s honestly a real accomplishment 🙂"

"Working in oncology, I can never comment on someone’s weight loss unless I specifically know it was on purpose, regardless of their age. I think it kind of ruffles feathers at times, but like I don’t want to congratulate someone for having cancer or something. It’s a weird place to be in."

– LizardofDeath

Unleashing Insults

"I remember when I lost the first big chunk of weight (around 50 lbs) it was like it gave some people license to talk sh*t about the 'old' me. Old coworkers, friends, made a lot of not just negative, but harsh comments about what I used to look like. One person I met after the big loss saw a picture of me prior and said, 'Wow, we wouldn’t even be friends!'”

"It wasn’t extremely common, but I was a little alarmed by some of the attention. My weight has been up and down since then, but every time I gain a little it gets me a little down thinking about those things people said."

– alanamablamaspama

Not Everything Goes After Losing Weight

"The loose skin is a bit unexpected."

– KeltarCentauri

"I haven’t experienced it myself, but surgery to remove skin takes a long time to recover. Longer than bariatric surgery and usually isn’t covered by insurance unless you have both."

– KatMagic1977

"It definitely does take a long time to recover. My Dad dropped a little over 200 pounds a few years back and decided to go through with skin removal surgery to deal with the excess. His procedure was extensive, as in he had skin taken from just about every part of his body excluding his head, and he went through hell for weeks in recovery, and he was bedridden for a lot of it."

– Jaew96

These Redditors shared their pleasantly surprising experiences.


"I can buy clothes in any store I want."

– WaySavvyD

"When I lost weight I was dying to go find cute, smaller clothes and I really struggled. As someone who had always been restricted to one or two stores that catered to plus-sized clothing, a full mall of shops with items in my size was daunting. Too many options and not enough knowledge of brands that were good vs cheap. I usually went home pretty frustrated."

– ganache98012

No More Symptoms

"Lost about 80 pounds in the past year and a half, biggest thing that I’ve noticed that I haven’t seen mentioned on here yet is my acid reflux and heartburn are basically gone. I used to be popping tums every couple hours and now they just sit in the medicine cabinet collecting dust."

– colleennicole93

Expanding Capabilities

"I'm all for not judging people by their appearance and I recognise that there are unhealthy, unachievable beauty standards, but one thing that is undeniable is that I can just do stuff now. Just stamina and flexibility alone are worth it, appearance is tertiary at best."

– Ramblonius

People Change Their Tune

"How much nicer people are to you."

"My feet weren't 'wide' they were 'fat.'"

– LiZZygsu

"Have to agree. Lost 220 lbs, people make eye contact and hold open doors and stuff"

"And on the foot thing, I also lost a full shoe size numerically and also wear regular width now 😅"

– awholedamngarden

It's gonna take some getting used to.

Bones Everywhere

"Having bones. Collarbones, wrist bones, knee bones, hip bones, ribs. I have so many bones sticking out everywhere and it’s weird as hell."

– Princess-Pancake-97

"I noticed the shadow of my ribs the other day and it threw me, there’s a whole skeleton in here."

– bekastrange

Knee Pillow

"Right?! And they’re so … pointy! Now I get why people sleep with pillows between their legs - the knee bones laying on top of each other (side sleeper here) is weird and jarring."

– snic2030

"I lost only 40 pounds within the last year or so. I’m struggling to relate to most of these comments as I feel like I just 'slimmed down' rather than dropped a ton. But wow, the pillow between the knees at night. YES! I can relate to this. I think a lot of my weight was in my thighs. I never needed to do this up until recently."

– Strongbad23

More Mobility

"I’ve lost 100 lbs since 2020. It’s a collection of little things that surprise me. For at least 10 years I couldn’t put on socks, or tie my shoes. I couldn’t bend over and pick something up. I couldn’t climb a ladder to fix something. Simple things like that I can do now that fascinate me."

"Edit: Some additional little things are sitting in a chair with arms, sitting in a booth in a restaurant, being able to shop in a normal store AND not needing to buy the biggest size there, being able to easily wipe my butt, and looking down and being able to see my penis."

– dma1965

People making significant changes, whether for mental or physical health, can surely find a newfound perspective on life.

But they can also discover different issues they never saw coming.

That being said, overcoming any challenge in life is laudable, especially if it leads to gaining confidence and ditching insecurities.