Sometimes we keep secrets to protect each other, and sometimes to protect ourselves. Other times it's just because bringing something up would be too awkward.

Reddit user u/slay1np0 asked:

"You get to confess one thing to your significant other and not get in trouble for it, what do you confess?"

Going With The Flow

I asked her out by accident and kinda just went with it, turned out very good though.


It Seems Only Fair

When you blow your nose in the shower and just leave snot on the wall, I wipe it off with your body scrubber.


Real Talk

All your problems could be solved with the smallest piece of foresight but you're so impulsive and unprepared that you work yourself into hysterics. I resent the fact that I watch you do something impulsive and know I'll hear you whine about it later. You could fix it, sure, but you'd rather sit and whine all while doing nothing to fix it.


Nobody Likes Sharing Fries

I lied. I don't enjoy sharing my fries with you.


Hard Times

Before we dated I took a sip of your coffee at work. It was such a weird thing for me to do. And I was surprised when I tasted mostly whiskey. I know you were going through a hard time then. Sorry I did that.


Can't Really Blame You

I have at times eaten a spoonful or two of the pancake mix in the fridge straight-up just because it has chocolate chips in it. I am a disgusting human being.

Sorry, sweetie


This One's A Keeper

I don't want to wait two years to move in together, even though I know it's best for your kids. I want all three of you in my life all the time right now because I'm selfish and I love you all so damn much.

Edit: For those saying I should tell her, we did have the discussion a while back and she's very set on being independent for a bit.


This One's A Bit Dubious

I sometimes play connect the dots with the freckles on your back while you are asleep cause I know you won't see it.


Like with an actual writing instrument?


Yeah, a washable marker. Less evidence.


All Of The Times, Really

* I ate the last piece of cheesecake that time.

* And that other time.
* ...and time too.


Cookie Reserves

You know how I came home yesterday with two boxes of girl scout cookies? I actually bought four boxes, two are my work cookies and two are our sharing cookies.


K-drama Is For Everyone

I watch Korean dramas with you because i also like them.


Oh boy, that's dreamy.


I'm kinda embarrassed to admit it to her tho, will do someday


No More Regret

For the first half of our relationship, I regretted dating you because I felt like I didn't give myself enough time to move on.

Now? I'm glad we met when we did and I love you more than anything.


I Was Being Nice

When I gave you that chicken biscuit from Bojangles, I didn't mean it. I was being nice. I actually wanted to eat it & resented the fact that you actually took it from me when I offered it.


Compliments Are Important

For the love of everything holy and/or purely scientific, please compliment me. Anything. Show interest in my day, say my hair looks nice, that you like the way I laugh. Just a sign that I'm not here as your personal morale booster and chatbot.

EDIT: since I've been DM'd about this, I'm male.


Chance Meetings

Years before I even met him, I had a small crush on his older brother.

We all went to the same school together, but he and I didn't share any classes and his brother was older, so I didn't know him or his family. I joined a school club that his brother was the president of, and I thought he was super cute and super smart. He is 4 years older than me and I was 14 at the time, so it was a super innocent, subtle crush that went away when I stopped going to the meetings later that year.

A few years later, it was really funny when my boyfriend finally introduced me to his family. This year is our 10th year anniversary, his brother and I are friends and I thank God everyday that I never did anything crazy when I was 14


Gaming The System

When I'm going out to a poker night with the boys and I tell you I want to take $500.00 I really only want to take $250. You always win the argument that ensues and I only get to take half of what I asked for.


Communication Is Key

Please, please, PLEASE, when you want to have sex just outright tell me. I'm not a mind reader. I know you're in to the whole "Authoritative Dom/Bratty Sub" thing (which I only pretend to like because you like it, sorry babe), but I just feel weird and wrong initiating without knowing whether you're on board or not. We don't see each other that frequently, and I feel bad knowing you're not satisfied when I miss your "subtle" (read: non-existent) signals. Throw me a bone, and I'll give you one in return, it's not that difficult.


Avoiding Conflict

I apologize to you for things I know are your fault because I don't like arguing.


You Were Half-Right

My fiance is deceased, but hopefully this still applies. I guess you can't hold secrets from the dead but he never knew while he was alive.

The friendship I assured him numerous times that was just a friendship, for my part, was true.

However, eventually my friend did wind up confessing feelings for me, and consequently sending me a nude. That I forwarded to his fiancee, which was the reason I suddenly lost an entire group of friends in a short period of time.

We did not "just drift apart," as I said. I just didn't want to hear "I told you so."


To Each Their Own, I Guess

The reason we run out of butter so often is because I eat it with sugar.


Add a dash of vanilla and whip it up, tada, now you're eating vanilla buttercream frosting.


Are you god?


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One of the scariest things is trying to pinpoint whether or not most of these people are just callous and rude or, quite possibly, they simmering sociopaths, destined to be the villain in a Dateline NBC or podcast episode.

Let's compare notes.

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