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People Explain Which Deal Breakers They Overlook In Their Significant Other

People Explain Which Deal Breakers They Overlook In Their Significant Other
Photo by Mayur Gala on Unsplash

Being in a relationship means opening your heart up to someone.

Now, depending on where you're at in your relationship decides how open the heart is. Couples in the beginning probably keep things close to the chest, playing it safe, not revealing too much just in case the new love goes sour. Why tell someone your darkest secrets if the fling only lasts 10 days? However, couples who have been together for a long time know quite a bit more. And sometimes what they know would be a dealbreaker for someone else.

Reddit user, u/Caspar-the-ghost, wanted to know:

What flaw do you accept about your significant other that would be a deal breaker for many?

An Enthusiasm For Everything


He talks a lot. He rambles about everything possible, from the origin of salty licorice to why there are so many irregular verbs in French to his old work experiences to the most minute historical or mythological facts. Sometimes he'll laugh when I'm working, I'll go "hm?", and he'll talk for five minutes straight about some obscure fact he just learned.

I love his enthusiasm. :) I genuinely like his little rants as signs of his boundless intellectual curiosity-- I always learn something, and we'll never run out of things to talk about. And besides, I talk a lot too, so we're well matched!


Understanding The Past To Have A Better Future

Talking about his exes. From what I know, people aren't really a fan of their SO talking about their exes. I'm perfectly fine with mine talking about his often because I just want to understand more about his prior experiences just so I can keep in mind what not to do, as well as let him get his feelings out because of how much its impacted him.


Just Tell me Where You Want To Go To Dinner!

He won't say no! If he doesn't want to do something or go somewhere he will beat around the bush. It is fun to act like I can't tell the he's implying no, until he finally says it.


But You're Still Together, Right?

She will leave a dirty plate on the counter top above the empty dishwasher rather than rinsing and filing it INSIDE the dishwasher.

Drives me nuts


Done And Out!

She pronounces .gif as [jeef].




We Can't Always Order Out

She doesn't cook.

Doesn't bother me since I love cooking and worked in catering for many years... But might be a deal breaker for some


Imitation Is The Sincerest Form Of Flattery? Right?

Honestly I think my boyfriend is pretty accepting about my god awful snoring. I've never thought to record it but the impressions he does are... not flattering.


No Time Apart. And It's Okay.

Both of us prefer to spend all of our time together. It's not a codependent/dysfunctional thing because neither of us gets upset or stressed out if we can't, but we're happiest in each other's company and, given a choice, we'd always choose to be together. The whole pandemic situation hasn't been a problem for us because it's actually allowed us to be together more as is our preference. However, I understand this doesn't work for most people, but it's always worked for us.


Marry Him. Marry Him Now.

He wore a fedora in one of his senior high school photos


more like a deal maker wtf


Time To Think


With my man, he needs time to think about serious subjects or even minor decisions sometimes, so you can't expect him to give an answer right away. It can be really frustrating, especially when you kind of need an answer right away.

I've come to think of it as him being very invested in even the little things in our lives because he cares so much. Because this is how his brain works, I try to give him lead time or if a decision needs to be made right away, I offer to be the one to make the call, which takes it off his plate all together.

He accommodates my anxieties and quirks, so it's definitely not a one way street.


When You Really Can't Blame The Person

My wife grew up in a hoarder home. Not the level you see on TV but close. So she is basically use to living in a house that isn't organized and she never really learned to clean up after herself.

Every now and than I get irritated but in our 5 years of marriage she has changed me to be a better person so significantly that i can live with it. For every flaw she has ten positives and I love her


You're Essentially His "Find Me" App

Hooooooly cow, this man would lose his own hand if it wasn't attached to him. Seriously, he loses his credit card every couple months and has to cancel/replace it.

Almost every morning I have to find his keys for him despite there being a BASKET in the KITCHEN for KEYS and stuff. They're never in the basket.

Forgets to take his meds too, which increases his spacey-ness (antiepileptics). I got him one of those plastic pill organizers...but half the time he takes the pills from the bottles instead and then forgets he took them so we never know if he actually took them or not unless I count the remaining pills.

Leaves dishes/food wherever once he's done with them (yes, cooking/dishes is my job but STILL), which means we have to replace perishable items like mayo or milk constantly because he'll leave them out all day/night and if I'm not home to put them away, they've gone bad.

I swear he uses up all of his focus at work, because he's a very skilled nurse...but the second he gets home it's as if his mind has run out of battery!

Still love this guy though


Much Different Story 20 Years Ago

Not necessarily a flaw, but when my ex and I first started out, he said "before we continue there's something I have to tell you." I was bracing myself for the worst, something like he had AIDS or I don't know what. He said "sometimes I like to wear skirts."

" that all? That's fine!" And we had years of fun times with him wearing skirts a lot. (I am female.) Went to an exhibition in the Met (NYC) about men in skirts through history, wore them out in public sometimes, wore them as pajamas and around the house, we did kinky things with them, and eventually he had a closet full of his own skirts (some he got online but others I helped him with at places like Kohl's). It did not bother me in the slightest and frankly I found it amusing, almost endearing.

Note that this was nearly 20 years ago so society wasn't as warmed up to the idea of gender fluidity, though it was in the making. In related news, after we broke up, he ghosted me and last I heard he is becoming a she. Which pisses me off because I could've totally been there to support and help with the transition. Wherever you are, I truly hope you are happier!


The Definition Of True Love

They don't fully close the tops on jars


How do you tolerate this madness[?]


Keeping Everything Close To The Chest

His intense secrecy. He doesn't even keep things secret on purpose, he just doesn't mention things as a default and the result is very, very weird. His whole family is like this, freakishly unwilling to talk about themselves. He is so secretive that I found out after seven years together that he has two brothers, not one. Nothing scandalous or anything at all, they talk on the phone once every few months (!!!) and when I emailed his brother he wrote back right away to say hi, seems like a nice normal dude.

But I guess since he lives in New Zealand he doesn't come to family gatherings so I haven't met him. This is par for the course.

I found out about a grad degree when we ran into one of his profs at a burrito place.When I asked why he never mentioned his brother, he just said that he would have if I asked. I don't know that "how many brothers do you have" is a question you should have to ask?!? But apparently...


We're Victims To Our Parents' Legacies

When she gets stressed she screams. It is horrible. I learned how her mother treated her and understand it a lot more. She already been to therapy once she realized how much it troubles me. That says a lot about her character. She saw a problem and is working on it. Now when she gets stressed and raises her voice, she knows I will just leave the house. I mean no disrespect, just leaving until she calms down.


The Most Intimate And The Most Vulnerable


She's not very good at sex. I love her and marriage isn't all about sex. She had an eating disorder (bulimia) most of her life and just kinda freezes up when we are intimate. We have three GORGEOUS and healthy kids after losing four and wondering if we would ever have any. We have a good life. Just not good sex.


You and my husband are in the same boat. We have been married 6.5 years, have two healthy kids, have lost two, and are currently incubating one.

I am NOT good at sex. We have fought, cried, and struggled to develop a healthy sex life. Its not easy, we have a long way to go, but we haven't given up.

Ultimately, we both recognize the need for a healthy sex life and we work really hard to help each other out. I hope someday it becomes more natural for me, but until then, my husband is a trooper!

Hoping the same for the two of you!


People Reveal The Weirdest Thing About Themselves

Reddit user Isitjustmedownhere asked: 'Give an example; how weird are you really?'

Let's get one thing straight: no one is normal. We're all weird in our own ways, and that is actually normal.

Of course, that doesn't mean we don't all have that one strange trait or quirk that outweighs all the other weirdness we possess.

For me, it's the fact that I'm almost 30 years old, and I still have an imaginary friend. Her name is Sarah, she has red hair and green eyes, and I strongly believe that, since I lived in India when I created her and there were no actual people with red hair around, she was based on Daphne Blake from Scooby-Doo.

I also didn't know the name Sarah when I created her, so that came later. I know she's not really there, hence the term 'imaginary friend,' but she's kind of always been around. We all have conversations in our heads; mine are with Sarah. She keeps me on task and efficient.

My mom thinks I'm crazy that I still have an imaginary friend, and writing about her like this makes me think I may actually be crazy, but I don't mind. As I said, we're all weird, and we all have that one trait that outweighs all the other weirdness.

Redditors know this all too well and are eager to share their weird traits.

It all started when Redditor Isitjustmedownhere asked:

"Give an example; how weird are you really?"

Monsters Under My Bed

"My bed doesn't touch any wall."

"Edit: I guess i should clarify im not rich."

– Practical_Eye_3600

"Gosh the monsters can get you from any angle then."

– bikergirlr7

"At first I thought this was a flex on how big your bedroom is, but then I realized you're just a psycho 😁"

– zenOFiniquity8

Can You See Why?

"I bought one of those super-powerful fans to dry a basement carpet. Afterwards, I realized that it can point straight up and that it would be amazing to use on myself post-shower. Now I squeegee my body with my hands, step out of the shower and get blasted by a wide jet of room-temp air. I barely use my towel at all. Wife thinks I'm weird."

– KingBooRadley


"In 1990 when I was 8 years old and bored on a field trip, I saw a black Oldsmobile Cutlass driving down the street on a hot day to where you could see that mirage like distortion from the heat on the road. I took a “snapshot” by blinking my eyes and told myself “I wonder how long I can remember this image” ….well."

– AquamarineCheetah

"Even before smartphones, I always take "snapshots" by blinking my eyes hoping I'll remember every detail so I can draw it when I get home. Unfortunately, I may have taken so much snapshots that I can no longer remember every detail I want to draw."

"Makes me think my "memory is full.""

– Reasonable-Pirate902

Same, Same

"I have eaten the same lunch every day for the past 4 years and I'm not bored yet."

– OhhGoood

"How f**king big was this lunch when you started?"

– notmyrealnam3

Not Sure Who Was Weirder

"Had a line cook that worked for us for 6 months never said much. My sous chef once told him with no context, "Baw wit da baw daw bang daw bang diggy diggy." The guy smiled, left, and never came back."

– Frostygrunt


"I pace around my house for hours listening to music imagining that I have done all the things I simply lack the brain capacity to do, or in some really bizarre scenarios, I can really get immersed in these imaginations sometimes I don't know if this is some form of schizophrenia or what."

– RandomSharinganUser

"I do the same exact thing, sometimes for hours. When I was young it would be a ridiculous amount of time and many years later it’s sort of trickled off into almost nothing (almost). It’s weird but I just thought it’s how my brain processes sh*t."

– Kolkeia

If Only

"Even as an adult I still think that if you are in a car that goes over a cliff; and right as you are about to hit the ground if you jump up you can avoid the damage and will land safely. I know I'm wrong. You shut up. I'm not crying."

– ShotCompetition2593

Pet Food

"As a kid I would snack on my dog's Milkbones."

– drummerskillit

"Haha, I have a clear memory of myself doing this as well. I was around 3 y/o. Needless to say no one was supervising me."

– Isitjustmedownhere

"When I was younger, one of my responsibilities was to feed the pet fish every day. Instead, I would hide under the futon in the spare bedroom and eat the fish food."

– -GateKeep-

My Favorite Subject

"I'm autistic and have always had a thing for insects. My neurotypical best friend and I used to hang out at this local bar to talk to girls, back in the late 90s. One time he claimed that my tendency to circle conversations back to insects was hurting my game. The next time we went to that bar (with a few other friends), he turned and said sternly "No talking about bugs. Or space, or statistics or other bullsh*t but mainly no bugs." I felt like he was losing his mind over nothing."

"It was summer, the bar had its windows open. Our group hit it off with a group of young ladies, We were all chatting and having a good time. I was talking to one of these girls, my buddy was behind her facing away from me talking to a few other people."

"A cloudless sulphur flies in and lands on little thing that holds coasters."

"Cue Jordan Peele sweating gif."

"The girl notices my tension, and asks if I am looking at the leaf. "Actually, that's a lepidoptera called..." I looked at the back of my friend's head, he wasn't looking, "I mean a butterfly..." I poked it and it spread its wings the girl says "oh that's a BUG?!" and I still remember my friend turning around slowly to look at me with chastisement. The ONE thing he told me not to do."

"I was 21, and was completely not aware that I already had a rep for being an oddball. It got worse from there."

– Phormicidae

*Teeth Chatter*

"I bite ice cream sometimes."


"That's how I am with popsicles. My wife shudders every single time."


Never Speak Of This

"I put ice in my milk."


"You should keep that kind of thing to yourself. Even when asked."

– We-R-Doomed

"There's some disturbing sh*t in this thread, but this one takes the cake."

– RatonaMuffin

More Than Super Hearing

"I can hear the television while it's on mute."

– Tira13e

"What does it say to you, child?"

– Mama_Skip


"I put mustard on my omelettes."

– Deleted User


– NotCrustOr-filling

Evened Up

"Whenever I say a word and feel like I used a half of my mouth more than the other half, I have to even it out by saying the word again using the other half of my mouth more. If I don't do it correctly, that can go on forever until I feel it's ok."

"I do it silently so I don't creep people out."

– LesPaltaX

"That sounds like a symptom of OCD (I have it myself). Some people with OCD feel like certain actions have to be balanced (like counting or making sure physical movements are even). You should find a therapist who specializes in OCD, because they can help you."

– MoonlightKayla

I totally have the same need for things to be balanced! Guess I'm weird and a little OCD!

Close up face of a woman in bed, staring into the camera
Photo by Jen Theodore

Experiencing death is a fascinating and frightening idea.

Who doesn't want to know what is waiting for us on the other side?

But so many of us want to know and then come back and live a little longer.

It would be so great to be sure there is something else.

But the whole dying part is not that great, so we'll have to rely on other people's accounts.

Redditor AlaskaStiletto wanted to hear from everyone who has returned to life, so they asked:

"Redditors who have 'died' and come back to life, what did you see?"


Happy Good Vibes GIF by Major League SoccerGiphy

"My dad's heart stopped when he had a heart attack and he had to be brought back to life. He kept the paper copy of the heart monitor which shows he flatlined. He said he felt an overwhelming sensation of peace, like nothing he had felt before."



"I had surgical complications in 2010 that caused a great deal of blood loss. As a result, I had extremely low blood pressure and could barely stay awake. I remember feeling like I was surrounded by loved ones who had passed. They were in a circle around me and I knew they were there to guide me onwards. I told them I was not ready to go because my kids needed me and I came back."

"My nurse later said she was afraid she’d find me dead every time she came into the room."

"It took months, and blood transfusions, but I recovered."


Take Me Back

"Overwhelming peace and happiness. A bright airy and floating feeling. I live a very stressful life. Imagine finding out the person you have had a crush on reveals they have the same feelings for you and then you win the lotto later that day - that was the feeling I had."

"I never feared death afterward and am relieved when I hear of people dying after suffering from an illness."



The Light Minnie GIF by (G)I-DLEGiphy

"I had a heart surgery with near-death experience, for me at least (well the possibility that those effects are caused by morphine is also there) I just saw black and nothing else but it was warm and I had such inner peace, its weird as I sometimes still think about it and wish this feeling of being so light and free again."


This is why I hate surgery.

You just never know.



"More of a near-death experience. I was electrocuted. I felt like I was in a deep hole looking straight up in the sky. My life flashed before me. Felt sad for my family, but I had a deep sense of peace."



"Nursing in the ICU, we’ve had people try to die on us many times during the years, some successfully. One guy stood out to me. His heart stopped. We called a code, are working on him, and suddenly he comes to. We hadn’t vented him yet, so he was able to talk, and he started screaming, 'Don’t let them take me, don’t let them take me, they are coming,' he was scared and yelling."

"Then he yelled a little more, as we tried to calm him down, he screamed, 'No, No,' and gestured towards the end of the bed, and died again. We didn’t get him back. It was seriously creepy. We called his son to tell him the news, and the son said basically, 'Good, he was an SOB.'”



"My sister died and said it was extremely peaceful. She said it was very loud like a train station and lots of talking and she was stuck in this area that was like a curtain with lots of beautiful colors (colors that you don’t see in real life according to her) a man told her 'He was sorry, but she had to go back as it wasn’t her time.'"


"I had a really similar experience except I was in an endless garden with flowers that were colors I had never seen before. It was quiet and peaceful and a woman in a dress looked at me, shook her head, and just said 'Not yet.' As I was coming back, it was extremely loud, like everyone in the world was trying to talk all at once. It was all very disorienting but it changed my perspective on life!"


The Fog

"I was in a gray fog with a girl who looked a lot like a young version of my grandmother (who was still alive) but dressed like a pioneer in the 1800s she didn't say anything but kept pulling me towards an opening in the wall. I kept refusing to go because I was so tired."

"I finally got tired of her nagging and went and that's when I came to. I had bled out during a c-section and my heart could not beat without blood. They had to deliver the baby and sew up the bleeders. refill me with blood before they could restart my heart so, like, at least 12 minutes gone."


Through the Walls

"My spouse was dead for a couple of minutes one miserable night. She maintains that she saw nothing, but only heard people talking about her like through a wall. The only thing she remembers for absolute certain was begging an ER nurse that she didn't want to die."

"She's quite alive and well today."


Well let's all be happy to be alive.

It seems to be all we have.

Man's waist line
Santhosh Vaithiyanathan/Unsplash

Trying to lose weight is a struggle understood by many people regardless of size.

The goal of reaching a healthy weight may seem unattainable, but with diet and exercise, it can pay off through persistence and discipline.

Seeing the pounds gradually drop off can also be a great motivator and incentivize people to stay the course.

Those who've achieved their respective weight goals shared their experiences when Redditor apprenti8455 asked:

"People who lost a lot of weight, what surprises you the most now?"

Redditors didn't see these coming.

Shiver Me Timbers

"I’m always cold now!"

– Telrom_1

"I had a coworker lose over 130 pounds five or six years ago. I’ve never seen him without a jacket on since."

– r7ndom

"140 lbs lost here starting just before COVID, I feel like that little old lady that's always cold, damn this top comment was on point lmao."

– mr_remy

Drawing Concern

"I lost 100 pounds over a year and a half but since I’m old(70’s) it seems few people comment on it because (I think) they think I’m wasting away from some terminal illness."

– dee-fondy

"Congrats on the weight loss! It’s honestly a real accomplishment 🙂"

"Working in oncology, I can never comment on someone’s weight loss unless I specifically know it was on purpose, regardless of their age. I think it kind of ruffles feathers at times, but like I don’t want to congratulate someone for having cancer or something. It’s a weird place to be in."

– LizardofDeath

Unleashing Insults

"I remember when I lost the first big chunk of weight (around 50 lbs) it was like it gave some people license to talk sh*t about the 'old' me. Old coworkers, friends, made a lot of not just negative, but harsh comments about what I used to look like. One person I met after the big loss saw a picture of me prior and said, 'Wow, we wouldn’t even be friends!'”

"It wasn’t extremely common, but I was a little alarmed by some of the attention. My weight has been up and down since then, but every time I gain a little it gets me a little down thinking about those things people said."

– alanamablamaspama

Not Everything Goes After Losing Weight

"The loose skin is a bit unexpected."

– KeltarCentauri

"I haven’t experienced it myself, but surgery to remove skin takes a long time to recover. Longer than bariatric surgery and usually isn’t covered by insurance unless you have both."

– KatMagic1977

"It definitely does take a long time to recover. My Dad dropped a little over 200 pounds a few years back and decided to go through with skin removal surgery to deal with the excess. His procedure was extensive, as in he had skin taken from just about every part of his body excluding his head, and he went through hell for weeks in recovery, and he was bedridden for a lot of it."

– Jaew96

These Redditors shared their pleasantly surprising experiences.


"I can buy clothes in any store I want."

– WaySavvyD

"When I lost weight I was dying to go find cute, smaller clothes and I really struggled. As someone who had always been restricted to one or two stores that catered to plus-sized clothing, a full mall of shops with items in my size was daunting. Too many options and not enough knowledge of brands that were good vs cheap. I usually went home pretty frustrated."

– ganache98012

No More Symptoms

"Lost about 80 pounds in the past year and a half, biggest thing that I’ve noticed that I haven’t seen mentioned on here yet is my acid reflux and heartburn are basically gone. I used to be popping tums every couple hours and now they just sit in the medicine cabinet collecting dust."

– colleennicole93

Expanding Capabilities

"I'm all for not judging people by their appearance and I recognise that there are unhealthy, unachievable beauty standards, but one thing that is undeniable is that I can just do stuff now. Just stamina and flexibility alone are worth it, appearance is tertiary at best."

– Ramblonius

People Change Their Tune

"How much nicer people are to you."

"My feet weren't 'wide' they were 'fat.'"

– LiZZygsu

"Have to agree. Lost 220 lbs, people make eye contact and hold open doors and stuff"

"And on the foot thing, I also lost a full shoe size numerically and also wear regular width now 😅"

– awholedamngarden

It's gonna take some getting used to.

Bones Everywhere

"Having bones. Collarbones, wrist bones, knee bones, hip bones, ribs. I have so many bones sticking out everywhere and it’s weird as hell."

– Princess-Pancake-97

"I noticed the shadow of my ribs the other day and it threw me, there’s a whole skeleton in here."

– bekastrange

Knee Pillow

"Right?! And they’re so … pointy! Now I get why people sleep with pillows between their legs - the knee bones laying on top of each other (side sleeper here) is weird and jarring."

– snic2030

"I lost only 40 pounds within the last year or so. I’m struggling to relate to most of these comments as I feel like I just 'slimmed down' rather than dropped a ton. But wow, the pillow between the knees at night. YES! I can relate to this. I think a lot of my weight was in my thighs. I never needed to do this up until recently."

– Strongbad23

More Mobility

"I’ve lost 100 lbs since 2020. It’s a collection of little things that surprise me. For at least 10 years I couldn’t put on socks, or tie my shoes. I couldn’t bend over and pick something up. I couldn’t climb a ladder to fix something. Simple things like that I can do now that fascinate me."

"Edit: Some additional little things are sitting in a chair with arms, sitting in a booth in a restaurant, being able to shop in a normal store AND not needing to buy the biggest size there, being able to easily wipe my butt, and looking down and being able to see my penis."

– dma1965

People making significant changes, whether for mental or physical health, can surely find a newfound perspective on life.

But they can also discover different issues they never saw coming.

That being said, overcoming any challenge in life is laudable, especially if it leads to gaining confidence and ditching insecurities.