Sometimes I sit around and wish I could go back and deliver a message to my younger self.
I think about ways I could encourage her or people I would help her avoid. I think about the people I'd tell her to wait for.
I think about the years of crap medical care we could avoid.
And then I remember 13-year-old me didn't listen to anybody anyway. Me and my Sony Sports Walkman had better things to do than listen to some time traveler.
Reddit user KiwiPangolin asked:
"You meet your 13 year old self, but you can only tell them 3 words. What do you say and why?"
They say humans really only want health, wealth, and happiness ...
Turns out Reddit is not only much more hopeful about their 13-year-old selves than I am, but the answers pretty much all fell into one of those categories. Happiness won by a mile, though.
Warning: Unexpected Feels Trips Ahead.
Health - Your Teeth
Dentist GIF
Giphy
"Brush your teeth."
- mynameisusama
"My teeth feel so much better since I started flossing after every meal a couple years ago."
"I floss after every meal I eat at home and it's a huge improvement."
- Zerilentix
"Can I show them my teeth as well? My 13 year old self wouldn't give a feck what my 30 year old self says unless I give physical examples. My teeth are, unfortunately, great examples of why."
- Andminus
Health - Don't
" 'Don't smoke, dumbass' "
"I smoked from 14 to 30. I tried quitting about 12 times and it never took."
"Then I talked to my doctor and she had me try a medication. After two or three weeks I didn't want to smoke. I finished the full two months prescription and have been nicotine free for six years."
"Don't give up. It is possible to quit, you just need to keep trying until you find what's right for you."
"Even if you can't quit completely, just try smoking less often."
- chef_in_va
"I told my Dad not to smoke every single day growing up."
"I used to throw fits when I was a kid because I knew how bad it was for him and I had watched my grandmother die from it at 64."
"He's made it to 73, but he virtually immobile due to COPD."
- AKSupplyLife
Wealth - Invest
"Invest Amazon 2003"
- uncaringbear
"Ah yes, because 13 year old who just hears an adult stranger saying 'invest amazon 2003' is totally going to start investing their pocket money in that."
- FartingBob
"You heavily invest in the Amazon rainforest only to have 70% of it destroyed by 2030."
"You are destitute."
- captaingigglesworth
Wealth - A Little Slap
Big Brother Fight GIF by 20th Century Fox Home Entertainment
Giphy
" 'No student loans.' "
"Then I'd slap myself to drive the point home."
- TravelingGleeman87
"And for me, a double slap—'Don’t ever co-sign!!' ”
- Sarcastic_babs
Happiness - Jeff
"DON'T MARRY JEFF"
- AlmostAlwaysADR
"This is mine too, and it’s the same name. Jeff is a prick."
- noimneverserious
"I seriously dislike every person I've met named Jeff. It's incredible."
"My born again Christian uncle, a co-worker at a movie theater who was a close friend and then stabbed me in the back, a co-worker I had about two years ago who was so f*cking annoying and incompetent... all Jeff."
"I don't hate a lot of people but that's three people I do. Like 90 percent of people I hate are named Jeff."
- catsinspace
"Must be a Jeff thing. My 3 words would be 'Don't date Jeff' "
- [Reddit]
Happiness - 5 Years To Make A Difference
"Here’s what I’d do: first I’d show young-me my college ID pic that I took at 18 years old. I’m 23 now, so the image looks enough like me and enough like him for him to understand and believe who I am."
"Then I’d shout slowly but as loud as I can:"
“ 'Dad pancan 2017' ”
"Hopefully he’d look up what 'pancan' is, and see that it refers to pancreatic cancer."
"2017 is the year he got diagnosed with stage 4, he died 2 years later, but if we had checked even earlier we might’ve detected it sooner and at a smaller stage, he may have survived."
"I was 13 in 2012 so I’d have 5 years to make a difference if I got that message to myself."
"Hope I was smart enough at 13 where if this scenario had occurred I could’ve done something about it. If not, well… at least I’d know how much time I had left with him."
"Definitely could’ve appreciated him more, he was the best dad in the goddamn world."
- Philander_Chase
Happiness - Talk About It
water sea GIF
Giphy
"Talk about drowning."
"When I was 12, I almost died in a rip tide on a trip with a friends family."
"The family I was with told my parents it was nothing (afraid of lawsuit perhaps) but told me that they had told my parents the whole story."
"Basically, the lifeguard saved me at the last minute, and the rip tides were so bad the beach was shut down for days afterwards."
"My parents never knew a life guard had to save me and were told I got scared and over reacted."
"The ptsd from almost dying (I had given up and was dying when the lifeguard reached me) led to depression and drug use as a teen."
"If my parents had known I truly gave up and thought I was dying and was ok with it, they would have gotten me therapy and my whole life would have been different."
- sassycatastrophe
Happiness - 30s Rock
" 'Wait two decades.' "
"She struggled with suicidal thoughts in her later teenage years and when her baby was first born."
"Knowing that The Good Sh*t (tm) happens when she's in her 30s should keep her going... and hopeful."
- insertcaffeine
"Mine was '30’s are AWESOME!' "
"My childhood and teenage years were good. My late 20s were the hardest years you can imagine."
"My life didn’t truly start until my 30’s. And I’m sure to tell as many teenagers as I can!"
- iluvcuppycakes
"35 here, and this is the truest thing."
"I was a young teen mom who struggled and struggled… just one thing after another, homeless for a short time, broke, domestic violence, etc, etc… until my 30s."
"Finally got to finish school, I don’t literally have to work 7 days a week while trying to be a good mom, and I’ve found a great 'balance' ”
"I’ve been looking for something my entire life. Not anymore."
"I’m able to prioritize being healthy and I’ve overcome the negative body issues (thinking I’m fat no matter what), but I’m still young enough to look and feel good."
"In all honesty, my 30s are the best times of my life, so far."
"I have time to listen and enjoy my kids, support their hobbies, businesses, and dreams. I finally own a home. I can finally go on vacations. 30s rock for me."
- Embarrassed-Tap9458
Happiness - Kimmy
" 'Yes Kimmy California.' "
"My sister wanted to move to California near where I was living."
"My life was really complicated at the time and I actively discouraged it. My marriage was a mess and I was afraid it would make it worse."
"She stayed where she was. About a year later she was killed by a drunk driver."
"My marriage ended."
"I would do literally anything to still have my sister here."
"Maybe that message to 13 year old me would make sense when it came up later and I would know to say yes when she asked about moving."
- purplecrazypants2
Happiness - Choose Art (?)
" 'Choose Art School.' "
"My entire college career was based on:"
" 'This will let me earn $X. Do business, do CS, do Cybersec. It’ll impress dad and the family. Artists starve and money = happiness anyways.' ”
"Made really good money in the business world before graduating and realised how little my degree helped me."
"All I wanted to do was animation for other people and that’s all I ever dream about."
"Should have done what I wanted to do instead of being a people-pleaser for so many years."
- Bryans-Ghost
"I did go to art school, and I was going to tell myself the exact opposite:"
" 'No art school!' "
"I wish I had done something practical like CS because it sucks to be financially unstable."
- lacksleepdna
Happiness - Dogs
Dogs Puppies GIF by MOODMAN
Giphy
"Always adopt dogs!"
"They give eternal, unconditional love, and help you to learn how to regulate your emotions and take care of others. I always thought I was too busy to take care of a pup. I wish I'd known how much it would help my depression and anxiety and just how freaking lovely they are to have around all the time."
- MarbleZee
Health - Authenticity
"Stop copying others"
- Kyndron
"Younger you: 'sToP cOpYiNg OtHeRs'."
- kAlb98
"Yeah this really held me back from a lot of things in life. I felt like I robbed myself of a lot of authentic experiences and yes I am happy where I’m at now. I have a daughter a nice job. Sometimes I think. 'If I wasn’t trying to be like others..where would I be?'."
- Embarrassed_Camel825
"Like, career-wise?"
- Dymonika
"It wasn’t so much my career, but more my personal life choices. A lot of my “interests” when I was young were simply because that’s what my friends were interested in. I wasn’t, but I wanted to fit in, so I copied them. Took me a long time to find myself."
-- Kyndron
Health - Say No To 'All Terrain Vehicles '
ride atv GIF by NOISEY
Giphy
" 'Stay off ATVs'."
"Rolled a 4-wheeler when I was 16. Left leg has never been the same."
- Cloudkicker91
"I work in a pediatric operating room in an area where atvs are popular. Anytime the weather is nice and the kids are out of school, the number of add on surgeries we have for atv injuries is mind boggling."
"4 year old, shattered femur, atv rollover. 8 year old, broken left arm, atv roll over. 13 year old, atv ejection, emergency crani. Shattered pelvis, degloving of the leg, brain bleeds, punctured lungs... On and on and on. So much agony. So many kids. It's easily the number one cause of emergent surgery we do."
"In my book, putting a kid on an atv is about the same as giving an infant a loaded gun for a pacifier."
"I'm really only replying to you because I hope at least one person will read this thread, change their mind, and keep a kid out of the OR/morgue"
- YamGroundbreaking953
Happiness - Music
"Keep making music"
- [Reddit]
"There is taking a break to grow and then there are Darkages where you forsake your instrument and regress."
"They suck."
- CatOnProzac
"i needed to hear this, thank you bro"
- honkhonker22
"Ohh this one man. Hits hard on me. Because of fucking college I stopped producing music, it was my passion since 13, if only I could have listen to myself earlier. Depression messed me, I tried to combine both music and university but didn’t work out. At the end I sticked to college and got a degree like the rest. I felt i was different, I wasn’t like the others, i made music, art for people to feel better."
- mynameisdanii
Health - On The Spectrum
"You are autistic."
"That’s my three words. That would’ve solved so many god damn problems, knowing who I am"
"A PSA to other fellow autistics who struggle with it. Go get a trampoline and jump! It can rewire your brain. Also 15Hz beta waves help balance out the brain! Go try it out"
- kelcamer
"It would of helped me so much to understand why i'm so different. And I could of had a proper education"
- Mighty_Mac
"THIS. If only we had known when I was younger. It wasn't until I was a young adult that I got a diagnosis. Would have saved me from soooo many problems I was going through precisely at 13."
- Rawbbeh
Wealth - Pokémon Cards
Ash Ketchum Cartoon GIF by Kennymays
Giphy
"Don't trade Charizard."
- facepwnage
"I wish I still knew where my holographic Charizard card was"
- TexasToast9
"I just resurfaced painful memories"
- clubdon
"I'm 30 now for reference and I think it was early high school when I made an ebay account and sold all my pokemon cards for like 50$. At the time making 50$ felt like winning the loto. I'm pretty sure I had charizard along with many other holos in mint condition. Oh well."
- muchostouche
Health - Abused
"You were abused"
- Bepis_drinker_cum
"I've been on reddit for almost 3 years and just bought coins for the first time for you! THIS, I always thought my feelings were invalid and 'people have it worse' , etc."
- MortalLilith
"The 'people have it worst' it's still pretty hard on me. For years I've thought that I was making a big deal out of something that wasn't 'that bad'."
- Natsume-Grace
"13 y/o you: 'No sh*t, sherlock'."
"You probably knew what was happening, but was unable to deal with it (legally, at least). Not your fault man, and your nice username"
- KokuRochu
Health - Therapy
"Go to therapy"
"I finally went to therapy in my mid 20s, and it improved my quality of life so much."
- cornygiraffe
" I'm not sure where my life would have lead had I been medicated 23 years earlier. I'm happy where I am now, but I can hardly imagine decades of suffering were necessary."
- Pleaselobotomize
"This is so important, it's unfortunate though when your parents and their culture don't believe in it"
- CXyber
So what would YOU tell your 13 -year-old self?
And do you think you'd have listened anyway?
Want to know more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.
For many childhood memories are overrun by living nightmares.
Yes, children are resilient, but that doesn't mean that the things we see as babes don't follow us forever.
The horrors of the world are no stranger to the young.
Redditor -2sweetcaramel- wanted to see who was willing to share about the worst things we've seen as kids, so they asked:
"What’s the creepiest thing you saw as a kid?"
Serious Danger
"Me and my best friend would explore the drainage tunnels under the Vegas area where we grew up. These were miles long and it was always really cool down there so it was a good way to escape the heat of our scorching hot summers. We went into this one that goes under the Fiesta casino and found a camp with a bunch of homeless people."
"Mind you we are like 11 years old lol. And we just kept going like it was nothing. It wasn’t scary then but when I look back at it we could have been in some serious danger. Our parents had no idea we did this or where we were and we had no cellphones. We could have been kidnapped and never have been found."
oofboof2020
Waiting for Food
"I was at a portillos once when I was 12 and I was waiting with my little brother at a booth while my parents got our food. This guy was standing with his tray kind of watching me then after a couple of minutes he started to walk over really fast not breaking eye contact with me."
"He was 2 feet from the table and my dad came out of nowhere and scared the s**t out of him. He looked so surprised and just said he wanted to see if I’d get scared or not. He left his tray full of food near the door and left. My folks reported him but we never went to that location again since we found a better one closer to home."
nowhereboy1964
Captain Hobo to the Rescue
"When I was a pretty young teen, my friends and I were horsing around in San Francisco and started hanging out to smoke with some homeless guys. Another homeless dude came up and began aggressively trying to shake us down for anything (money, smokes, a ride, drugs- all of it) and wouldn’t take no for an answer."
"We got in over our heads and could tell this guy was now riling the other 2 guys up and they were acting like they wanted to jump us. Some grandfather-looking old homeless man appeared out of nowhere and yelled at us to get the f**k out of here- nice kids like us don’t belong down here at this hour!!"
"Captain Hobo saved our lives that night. My parents sincerely thought we were at a mall all day lol."
FartAttack911
Survival
tsunami GIF
Giphy
"I was 7 and survived the 2004 tsunami in Thailand. Witnessed the wave rise way above the already massive palm trees (approx. 40ft?) and my family and I watched/heard the wave crash into the ground from a rooftop."
faithfulpoo
These Tsunami stories are just tragic.
On the Sand
Scared The Launch GIF by CTV
Giphy
"We were a group of kids who went to swim in a local lake. And there was a dead body on the beach with their hands raised and their legs bent unnaturally that local police just took out of the same lake. I've never put my foot in these waters again."
oyloff
Be Clever
"I was walking to school and I was about 5 or 6 years old and some guy pulled up beside me in his car and asked if I would get in. He also offered me sweets to do so. I said no. The creepy bit was when he calmly said ‘clever boy’ to me, then drove off. I’ve never even told my parents or anyone else about this as it would most likely freak them out."
OstneyPiz
Bad Jokes
"Dad's side of the family pranked me by burying a fake body on our back property and had me dig it up to find valuables. Was only allowed to use a lantern for light. They stuffed old clothes with chicken bones. Sheetrock mud where the head was... Random fake jewelry as the treasures... I was like maybe 10 or 11.. I remember digging up the boot first and started gagging because it became real at that point."
Alegan239
YOU
Who Are You Reaction GIF by MOODMAN
Giphy
"Woke up to find my little brother staring at me in the dark, asking, Are you really you?"
PrettyLola2004
Siblings can really be a bunch of creepers.
No one should talk to others in the dark though.
Not all pet owners have the same relationship with their pets.
While anyone who decides to become a pet owner, or pet parent as some say, love their pets equally, some never ever let them leave their side.
Taking their pet with them to work, running errands, even on vacations.
Many pet parents even allow their pets to share their bed with them when going to sleep.
For others though, this is where a line is finally drawn.
Redditor Piggythelavasurfer was curious to hear whether pet owners allowed their pets to share their bed with them, as well as the reasons why they do/don't, leading them to ask:
"Do you let your pet sleep in your bed? Why/why not?"
The Tiny Issue Of Water...
"Absolutely not."
"I have fish."- Senior-Meal3649
Everyone Gets Lonely Eventually...
"I adopted an eleven year old cat the day before Halloween."
"She has mostly lived in my closet since I got her, and she hasn’t been too interested in coming out."
"Last night, she came out of my closet and jumped up on my bed, and crawled under my covers and curled up by my feet to sleep."
"I was so happy!"- YellowBeastJeep
The Comforting Reminder That You're Not Alone...
"I recently lost my Greyhound but I used to let him sleep on my bed with me."
"The company was nice and he was no trouble to have on my bed."- HoodedMenace3
Hungry Cookie GIF by De Graafschap Dierenartsen
Giphy
What Do You Mean Allow?
"I have no choice."
"She is a cat, cats do whatever they want."- Small_cat1412
"He lets me sleep in my bed."- Poorly-Drawn-Beagle
Wouldn't Have It Any Other Way
"I carry my old boy upstairs to bed every night."- worst_in_show
Hug GIF by The BarkPost
Giphy
Who Needs An Alarm Clock?
"I let my two cats sleep with me."
"They're so full of love and just want cuddles all the time."
"And so do I."
"We've all developed a lil routine."
"Get to bed, oldest sleeps on my feet to keep them warm, youngest lies in my arm while I lie on my side (she the little spoon), then when I snooze my alarm for work in the morning the youngest paws at my face and meeps loudly to wake me up."- GhostofaFlea_
Whose Bed Is It Anyway?
"Yes."
"They're also kind enough to let me squeeze into whatever space they've left for me."
"Although I do get a few dirty looks off them."- Therealkaylor
"I found this tiny kitten screaming her head off under a car."
"Would not come out."
"Got some food and some water in dishes."
"I stood by the tire so she couldn't see my feet."
"She got curious about the food and water and started gobbling it down."
"I thought she would bolt when I squatted down."
"She was too busy eating."
"I grabbed her by the nape of the neck and all four legs went straight out and she tried to scratch me to death."
"I got her in the door and tossed her toward the couch."
"She ricocheted off the couch as if she was a ping pong off a table and I lost sight of her."
"I put out food and water and a sandbox and did not see that kitten for three days."
"On the third day, I came home and she was on my bed pillow."
"I thought she would bolt when I came near, but she didn't."
"I wanted to sleep so I tried to scoot her little butt off my pillow."
"She would not go."
"I put my head down to sleep and that is the way it was from then on."
"She ran the roost."- Logical_Cherry_7588
sleepy kitten GIF
Giphy
Sleeping Is A Prerequisite...
"No, he's a cat and he cannot keep still during the night."
"He walks across the headboard, opens the closet doors, jumps into the windows and rustles the blinds, etc."
"If he would sleep he could stay, but alas, he's a ramblin' man."- Spong_Durnflungle
Saying No Just Isn't An Option...
"'Let'."
"Lol."
"It's a cat's world and I'm happy to be on her good side."- milaren
Felines Only!
"The cat does, the dog doesn't and the horse certainly does not either."- Xcrowzz
Angry Tom And Jerry GIF by Boomerang Official
Giphy
Is That My Hair On That Pillow?
"My dog is perfect."
"She comes up, cuddles til we start to fall asleep, then gets down to sleep on her bed so she doesn't get too hot."
"Jumps back up in the early morning for wake up cuddles."
"The hair everywhere is the only downside but she is so cozy, what can you do."- HoodieWinchester
It is easy to understand how some people are able to fall asleep more easily knowing their friend and protector is there, in bed, with them.
Though we can't blame others who don't want to run the risk of being scratched or bitten in the middle of the night either...