We all want a love like Ron and Tammy Swanson... um, I mean Nick Offerman and Megan Mullally.
Offerman and Mullally have been together for nearly 20 years and they've been making legions of fans laugh ever since. When they're not writing books about their Hollywood love story (The Greatest Love Story Ever Told was a bestseller) or appearing on the same shows (their Parks and Recreation shtick was comedy gold), they're charming people with their hijinks on Twitter.
Mullally's also a natural born artist, as she showed with an, um, portrait she made of her husband in character as his Parks and Rec character Ron Swanson.
"I've been talking to this for three days," she wrote
i’ve been talking to this for three days @Nick_Offerman https://t.co/eNFPpBttNU— Megan Mullally (@Megan Mullally) 1550485908.0
I'm pleased to report I wasn't the only one who was reminded of Mr. Potato Head as the tortilla in Toy Story 3:
@MeganMullally @Nick_Offerman Loved you in Toy Story 3! https://t.co/gWnDR0Tr1I— Kevin Ryan (@Kevin Ryan) 1550516691.0
Others just thought it was a brilliant depiction of Offerman in action.
@MeganMullally @Nick_Offerman If anything ever happens this is the picture to give to the police and press— Em Yeol (@Em Yeol) 1550513271.0
@MeganMullally @Nick_Offerman If you put that picture on a T-shirt or mug I would buy it.— Ann Connors (@Ann Connors) 1550502539.0
@MeganMullally @Nick_Offerman I am obsessed with this. That is not hyperbole. His eyes are haunting me.— entreprenurr (@entreprenurr) 1550524650.0
@MeganMullally @Nick_Offerman This captures the essence of the character better than even a photo could.— JAGeorge (@JAGeorge) 1550519285.0
But it was Offerman's pitch perfect response...
Please let me back in the house? https://t.co/RoUQTKs0dD— Nick Offerman (@Nick Offerman) 1550499442.0
...that had fans rolling:
@Nick_Offerman You two are the most adorable! Sooooooo much 💖💖💖 and so many 😂😂😂— maximilian (@maximilian) 1550499552.0
@Nick_Offerman Thank you and @MeganMullally for bringing the laughs and happy the laughs this world and social medi… https://t.co/CVElTbLMOq— Meaghan Steele (@Meaghan Steele) 1550538845.0
@Nick_Offerman Relationship goal.— quentin b (@quentin b) 1550499571.0
@Nick_Offerman 😂😂😂you could always go over to Karen Walkers or Ron Swanson’s 😂😂😂— IRON WOMAN!! (@IRON WOMAN!!) 1550521324.0
@Nick_Offerman Sorry bud, I think @MeganMullally is about to 'Thank U, Next' you.. 😕— Space Salami Mami Mom (@Space Salami Mami Mom) 1550542496.0
We hope this relationship never dies.
"Straight men of Reddit, what is the strangest thing you have been told not to do because 'that's gay?'"
The following behavior just screams, "gay," fellas. Watch out.
Song Choice
"Sing a Lily Allen song during karaoke."
– KentuckyFriedEel
School Protocol
"Advice I received in high school from other students:"
"Don't cross your legs with one knee over the other. Put one ankle over the other knee."
"When carrying books, palm them and carry them at your side. Don't rest one edge of the books near your waist."
"Never button the top button of your shirt."
– Gorf_the_Magnificent
Look, But Don't Look
"This one time, at summer camp, this guy who'd just been swimming in the lake told me you could tell how cold the water was by how hard his nipples were. 'But don't stare too long,' he said, 'because that's gay.'"
"You were the one who told me to look in the first place!"
– SonOfTheShire
Sandwich For Sissies
"When I was a kid, my dad called me a sissy because I cut a sandwich diagonally."
– captainmagictrousers
Getting Woodwind
"I played the clarinet. I got called Faginet a lot."
– Virtual_Caramell
"But that's one women do," one might argue.
Daddy Duty
"Changing my daughter's diaper. Mentioned it in the office one day. Called gay."
– Bullydaddy
A Lighter Shade
"Buying a white IPhone."
– Freshrendar
"Added my husband (then boyfriend) to my phone plan. Went to the store on my own to upgrade both our phones. We both just wanted the next gen Samsung. It was only available in purplish-pink in store."
"I shrugged and said it didn't matter, he's putting a case on it anyways. Guys working at the store kept trying to talk me out of it, actively pushing me to go to another store, making them lose commission, just so my partner wouldn't have a feminine phone. He used his pink phone for 3 years."
– Caity26
Life Skills
"I've been criticized for knowing how to sew and cook. Those are essential life skills!"
– placeholderNull
"My father was a Marine drill instructor in the 50's. Guess who did all the sewing in my house growing up?"
"Yeah, no one dared to call him gay for it."
– desrever1138
Here are examples of guidelines for being a manly man, according to manly men.
Manly Appetite
"Not a straight man but... back in my bartending days I asked a man if he wanted to see a dessert menu. He said 'if I wanted dessert I'd order wings like a real man.'"
"Weird flex but okay."
– BigJiggies
When I'm In The Mood, I Masticate
"When I'm feeling extra manly, I just take a bite out of a cow and then chew on some raw wheat."
"Like a man."
– AmigoDelDiabla
No Appointments Necessary For Straight Men
"I left a pick-up basketball game because I had an appointment to get a haircut. Evidently, the only straight way to get a haircut is as a walk in."
– patricksaurus
Abiding By The Law Is So Gay
"Using turn signals. And not as some sort of euphemism, but literally using them while driving to turn or change lanes."
– Sargatanus
In grade school, some fellow classmates asked me to check for gum on my shoe because they saw me step in some.
When I lifted my leg to take a gander, the boys were howling hysterically as if my actions confirmed something.
Well, it sure did. Apparently, if I l looked at the bottom of my shoe from in front of me, I was "normal," but since I bent my leg back and looked at the bottom of my shoe from behind, that made me "so gay."
Although, I didn't come out 'til years later, maybe those goons were onto something. Thanks for the heads up, guys.
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