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People Share Their Best 'My Teacher Is An Idiot' Experiences

People Share Their Best 'My Teacher Is An Idiot' Experiences
Taylor Wilcox/Unsplash

So listen, we don't expect teachers to have a master-level grasp of everything they teach. Nobody expects you to be a marine biologist with a specialization in cetaceans to teach a third grader about dolphins.

You should at least know they aren't fish.


As an educator, I'm not here for expecting teachers to know everything all the time with no mistakes.


Humans don't human that way, so the way that the original poster framed the question gave me pause...

Reddit user A_Purple_Pengiuns asked:

"What is the moment you realized 'my teacher is an idiot.' "

But the answers absolutely convinced me that this needed sharing. Most of the responses weren't about the teacher not knowing something, more about the teacher's attitude.

A willingness to argue with and/or mock small children is a pretty solid indicator that you're not cut out to be a teacher.

Look at some of these responses.

Lava

Lava Thumbs Up GIF Giphy

"2nd grade teacher had our class naming the hottest things we could think of."

"A few kids already said the most obvious, like sun and fire so the third thing I could think of off the top of my head was lava."

"Turns out lava isn't real; the teacher had the whole class laugh at me for believing it was."

"She made me feel stupid as hell for years until I learned that lava IS real, and my teacher was a d*ck."

- Morpheus11011

Lettoochay?

Hannibal Buress Diet GIF by Adult Swim Giphy

"When my ENGLISH teacher (I’m from Italy so we have English as a second language) said 'lettoochay' instead of 'lettuce.' "

"She was also one of the worst teachers and ended up getting replaced."

-Kriumpus

"I may start calling lettuce 'lettoochay.' Sounds so fancy."

-iamamuttonhead

What Makes An Animal

Disney Pixar Ocean GIF by Disney Giphy

"I remember the time my 4th grade teacher tried educating us on what makes an animal. One of the criterion she came up with was all animals have brains."

"I asked, 'What about jellyfish? They don’t have brains.' ”

"To which she replied, 'Well then they aren’t alive, are they?' ”

-cakeman936

A Unit Of Measurement

Confused Gary Coleman GIF Giphy

"In primary school, I asked my teacher what an ounce was."

"She hushed me, told me it wasn't real and to never ask that again. As though as a nine year old I was asking about an ounce of weed and not the unit of measurement."

-elfbro

" 'not here kid, meet me in the parking lot after class.' "

- Disposable591

"Probably was on weed if that was what they immediately thought you were talking about."

- ADABISCUIT

Thanks, Mom

Mothers Day Eyes GIF Giphy

"My 2nd grade teacher wanted to hold me back because of my math grade."

"Her evidence? She did these things called mad minutes where you had to try and solve as many problems as possible."

"I don't perform well under that kind of pressure. My anxiety doesn't allow it."

"My mom laughed in the teacher's face when she explained her reasoning for wanting to hold me back. The teacher tried to put my mom in her place by saying that only a professional educator can make these kinds of assessments."

"My mom had a master's in education. I didn't get held back."

-IntentionalTexan

How Projectors Work

Music Video Colors GIF by Polyvinyl Records Giphy

"My biology teacher in high school asked me a question, the answer to which was projected onto the whiteboard via an overhead projector."

"I looked at the whiteboard, and she quickly placed her left hand over the part that had the answer to try and hide it."

"Except instead of covering what was on the projector, she covered the whiteboard it was projecting onto. I pointed out that everything was still projected onto her hand ... cause it's a projector. So I could still see the answer."

"She was visibly upset, kind of panicked, and then she slapped her right hand on top of her left hand as if that was going to cover it. It didn't, of course, cause projectors just keep projecting onto whatever surface."

"I bursted out with laughter. She kicked me out and called my parents."

-ok-ox

Possibly Senile?

What The Wtf GIF by Fluffy Friends Giphy

"When my grade 2 teacher tried to hold me back a year, only to discover that she thought I was my older sibling (3 years my senior) whom she had also taught in the 2nd grade."

"To be fair, she was way too old to still be teaching. She may have been legitimately senile?"

"I had good grades for a 7-year-old, whereas my sibling (though not a dullard) didn’t. So I came home with an excellent report card ... along with a letter to my parents that I was going to be held back due to poor grades."

"Wtf?"

" My parents sorted it out and I didn’t get held back, but it was definitely a big deal. This was in 1980 and teachers could in fact fail kids like this back then, and did so often. Or at least this one teacher did."

"I guess it was an accepted practice at that place and time. I'm glad they don't do it like this anymore."

- CrieDeCoeur

Ocean Life

the hitchhikers guide to the galaxy dolphin GIF Giphy

"She thought dolphins were fish. No amount of arguing by third grade me was enough to convince her otherwise".

" 'They live in the ocean, they're fish.' "

-AssociationJumpy

"Should have asked her about seaweed, or sponges."

-ReallyHadToFixThat

People Explain Which Movie Never Fails To Make Them Cry

People Explain Which Movie Never Fails To Make Them Cry

www.georgetakei.com

People talk about their go-to films for when they need to let some emotions loose.

Native Speakers v. Peggy Hill

I Agree Episode 2 GIF by P-Valley Giphy

"My mom went to take a university class in Greek. She’s a native speaker, so she was hoping for an easy A and to maybe just read some new literature."

"The professor was Peggy Hill-ing it hard and my mom tried to correct her pronunciation. This woman really told my mom that she was wrong about how to pronounce it!"

"Then another native speaker in the class spoke up and confirmed my mother was right."

"She never called on either of them in class again lol"

-Is_Bob_Costas_Real

Since You're Not Checking...

surprised gerry dee GIF by CBC Giphy

"College professor has us reading a handout; at one point the essay mentions 'Acmeism' and the professor stops to ask the class if anyone knows what that means."

"Silence. 'Darn, I was really hoping someone would be able to tell me.' "

"A quick spotlight search showed to me that this was essentially a genre of Russian poetry, but what was really revealed is that she was too lazy to search an unfamiliar term before teaching with it and therefore she wouldn't be searching anything in my essays either."

"I started making up terms and schools of though, just stringing words together like 'Post-Counter Bifuturism.' I got A after A."

-JewcyBoy

Just Teach Us About Enzymes

jesus GIF Giphy

"When a substitute biology teacher spent the whole class telling us evolution wasn’t real and we should rip those pages out our textbooks."

"He also felt it was vital for us to know that Jesus was a vegetarian (pretty sure there was a whole lot in the Bible about Jesus and fish, though) and if we weren’t vegetarians we were going to die of cancer like his brother did."

"We were meant to be learning about enzymes."

- TechnicalZucchini6

Because Plants Can't Scream

Food Salad GIF by Nickelodeon Giphy

"My high school biology teacher somehow found out I was a vegetarian and took the time from one of our lessons to say this, standing in front of my desk, slightly pointing at me with her fingers:"

“ 'I know some people believe they are different because they don’t eat meat, but you’re still just as cruel as anyone else. Plants have feelings too, you just don’t care about them because they can’t scream.' ”

"I signed up for another biology class, but she kept talking sh*t about me to my classmates in the other class just because I decided not to eat meat. I'd never even spoken to her about it!"

- Impossible_Past_7225

Yaks Are Extinct?

Giphy

"My sister's teacher in grade 2 thought saying 'yeah' was wrong somehow."

"She also thought it was the sound that yaks make."

"And that yaks are extinct."

"So if you said 'yeah' to her she'd just say 'is there an extinct animal in here?' until you said yes."

"Imagine all those little kids growing up arguing about yaks being extinct and eventually finding out they're still around and quite common."

- WaterChestnutII

The White Man's Burden

Season 19 Episode 10 GIF by The Simpsons Giphy

"9th grade global history. It's an overview survey style class at best, nothing too deep - except the teacher."

"Teacher is a self proclaimed tough guy; but he failed out of state trooper programs, local police program, and was cut from every team he tried out for in high school, and college."

"Finally he ended up a teacher in a small town that doesn't have a good reputation. Maybe that explains his attitude?"

"Anyway, he gets up in front of the class and tells everyone when we do an overview of Christianity, Judaism, and Islam. He doesn't stop there, though."

"He then tells us that all religion is garbage, and Christianity is the white man's burden. If you believe in it please drop this class..."

"To 14yr olds. In 9th grade. In a small town school where there is only 4 different history classes; one for each year of high school."

"Get real dude, we couldn't drop your class if we wanted to and you know it. And believe me, we all wanted to. He was exhausting and all we wanted was for him to shut the hell up."

- DaylightPrarie

Too Young To Play That

fail black and white GIF Giphy

"In grade 6 our English teacher has as write out a fictional police report."

"I wrote about Grand Theft Auto; not the game, but the actual crime of stealing a car. We were supposed to write about a crime and that was just the one I picked."

"But because I used that term Grand Theft Auto, she instantly failed me without even reading it or letting me explain."

"She said I just wrote about a video game that I was too young to be playing at the time."

- skunkdude13

Ladies Don't Hydrate

selena gomez water GIF Giphy

"Not a teacher but she's still a secretary or something. The point is she had a high position of authority at my school, and she would watch classes if the teacher was out."

"If she caught you doing something she didn't like in the hallway, she'd pull you aside and ask why you did what you did (you could literally have your phone in your pocket and she would still pull you aside because it wasn't in your bag) in a super accusing tone."

"She was in the hallway talking to some teachers when I went to get some water, and she told me to stop and said 'ladies don't do that.' "

"Ladies, is it improper to want water? Am I some freak of nature for being thirsty?"

- scarieststar

I Didn't Go Here!

she doesnt even go here mean girls GIF Giphy

"I had just moved to a new school in the beginning of the second term of the school year in 10th grade."

"The math teacher gave me - the new kid- demerits and detention for not doing the homework she had given the class the previous term before the break. You know, the term that I was in a completely different high school and city for?"

"I couldn't even defend myself or else I'd just get more detention."

- tyedontdye

Square Watermelons

Hungry Watermelon GIF Giphy

"My sons teacher. In 4th grade they had to do a project on GMO’s. They had to read a provided article and then write an essay on the positives and negatives of GMO crops and then state their opinion on the use of them."

"It was online learning during lockdown, so I was in the room listening when I heard the teacher tell the kids some examples of a GMO crops were square watermelons and pumpkins."

"Now, the Japanese got real innovative with vegetable and fruit molds to grow produce into fun little shapes and so there are, indeed, square watermelons and pumpkins. We actually got a pumpkin to grow into the shape of a 5 gallon bucket once!"

"But what she was explaining to the kids is that they were square because they were genetically altered to grow like that. She, apparently, was unaware that they only look like that because they put the immature fruit into a mold and allowed it to fill the space taking on the shape of the mold. There is no genetic modification involved."

"I had to tell my son to completely erase everything she taught them about GMOs because none of it was true, thankfully the online article and movie they provided was pretty accurate."

"They are so young, imagine all the kids that took her square watermelon GMO lie as fact."

- ViciousFlowers

Teachers are human, humans make mistakes. Facts are facts. Please, teachers, do not decide to be Smugbob Smuggypants about it.

These answers got me wondering, do your negative teacher experiences follow the same pattern?

Was it the incident, or the attitude ABOUT it that seared it into your mind?

Let me know in the comments.

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Infamous Internet Rumors That Ended Up Being True

Reddit user strakerak asked: 'What started out as an internet rumor that ended up being infamously true?'

boy playing at laptop inside room
Photo by Ludovic Toinel on Unsplash

In 2017, I returned to my office after my lunch break to hear my supervisors discussing Tom Petty. This seemed like a random topic to me until one of my supervisors told me Tom Petty had passed away. He was a huge fan of Petty and spent the next hour or so combing through the internet to get more information.

He came back into the room my other supervisor and I were working in and announced that Tom Petty wasn't dead after all. News outlets had jumped the gun to announce his death, but he was actually still alive.

The next day, I came in to find out that Tom Petty was dead; the news may have been premature, but true.

This is a classic example of the rumor being started on the internet. Sometimes, like with the news of Tom Petty's death, the rumor can run wild and appear everywhere. Other times, the rumor can be seen by just a few people and dismissed. However, a lot of times, these rumors turn out to be true.

Redditors know a lot of internet rumors that turned out to be true, and are eager to share.

It all started when Redditor strakerak asked:

"What started out as an internet rumor that ended up being infamously true?"

The King Of Pop

"Michael Jackson writing the music for Sonic 3."

"He actually did, but was never credited on the game because it would breach his contract with his record label."

– -WigglyLine-

"He did the same when he appeared on The Simpsons. He appeared under a pseudonym, and the Producers said it was an impersonator."

"Only years later they confirmed it really was Michael."

"His singing voice was actually done by an impersonator, though."

– given2fly_

The Truth Comes Out

"In 1998, US Men’s National Team captain John Harkes was shockingly cut from the team right before the World Cup. The coach claimed it was because Harkes wouldn’t fit into his new preferred formation, but rumors flew on the early internet that it was actually because he had slept with his teammate Eric Wynalda’s wife. The rumor was so well-known in soccer circles that Harkes expressly denied it in his autobiography the next year."

"Fast forward 12 years to 2010 and Wynalda admits it’s true. The coach then came out and admitted it was why he dropped Harkes, but that he’d planned to keep the secret as long as Wynalda did."

– guyfromsoccer

Video Evidence

"The Tim Burton Hansel and Gretel that aired once on halloween in the 80's."

"I heard for years that it was fake but I knew it was real because my dad recorded everything in the 80s and he recorded that. We let a good friend of ours borrow it and switch it over from VHS to DVD and soon after that it made its way on to the internet , and there it is now. I know it's our copy because the tracking in the beginning is screwed up. Still have the VHS."

– Frozenthickness

"There was a similar story with a Nickelodeon movie called Cry Baby Lane. It was supposed to be so scary that Nickelodeon got complaints and denied its existence for years. Someone uploaded a taped copy to youtube about a decade ago."

– PattiAllen

The Movie Business

"That North Korea hacked Sony Pictures because of The Interview movie."

"I worked in the movie business at the time and the account managers at Sony all basically needed to get new identities as all of their personal information got leaked online."

OldMastodon5363

"My partner worked on that movie and the production bought all the crew 1 year of an identity theft tracking service."

CMV_Viremia

Keep Away From The Ears Of Kids

"Some banned episodes or scenes of cartoons."

"For example, I remember there was a Dexter’s Lab cartoon where he clones evil versions of DeDe and himself and they swear like every other word (censored of course), and people debated whether it even existed cause they only aired it like once. Now it’s pretty accessible online."

– Spledidlife

Yes, It's True

"Echelon, a massive electronic espionage system by the US and allies to intercept all electronic messages, especially emails."

"In the mid-nineties it was a topic on conspiracy BBS boards. A lot of people in my bubble at the time (mainly uni students in Europe) were including fake threats to the US in the their email signatures as a way to "protest" and "fill the system with false alarms" (obviously useless)."

"Then, in 1999-2000 came out to be true and a lot of security service agencies from UK and other US allies started to admit they were part of the espionage network."

– latflickr

How The Mighty Fell

"John Edward’s love child."

– ACam574

"A reminder that he was cheating on his wife while she was hospitalized for cancer treatment."

– Fanclock314

Ugh...

"Carrie Fisher's heart attack. Some a**hole who was on the same flight was livetweeting the whole medical emergency and justified it by insisting she was just making sure the family was informed."

– everylastlight

It Actually Happened

"Every year around her birthday there was a rumor that Betty White died. When I heard she died, I scoffed, saying that dumb rumor is back.... then saw it on the news. I was in shock."

– Known-Committee8679

"The fact that Betty died literally right before she turned 100 is such a Betty White way to go out."

– Paganigsegg

Big Actor, Small Roles

"I distinctly remember some rumors about the reason why Bruce Willis was taking so many roles in sh*tty movies before it was announced he has dementia."

– KampferMann

"RedLetterMedia did a deep dive on his recent movie activity to try and work out why exactly he was taking part in basically scam-movies. They noticed he had an earpiece in one of the scenes and joked that the director was feeding him lines. I remember they even disclaimed over the rumours at the time, and possible made a follow-up vid when it was revealed to the public."

– CardinalCreepia

What To Do Next?

"That the writer of LOST were making it up as they went."

"Turned out to be absolutely true."

– homarjr

That last one was kind of obvious!

Do you have any to add? Let us know in the comment below.

Person holding large stack of books
Photo by Jay Lamm on Unsplash

Whether you're naturally interested in fun facts and trivia or not, it's always nice to know a few that you can pull out of your pocket at a moment's notice as a nice conversation starter.

But there are some fun facts out there that are so weird, people become more preoccupied with how the teller found out that information rather than the information itself.

Redditor Dry_Bus_935 asked:

"What is your 'don't ask me how I know' random fact?"

Nuclear Fail Safe

"You have quite a lot of time, certainly more than ten seconds, to turn back on the main pumps of a nuclear reactor once you have accidentally turned them off."

- egorf

"I'm not surprised. The amount of fail safes, redundancies, and emergency scenario planning for nuclear power plants is insane."

"I toured a nuclear plant and wrote my high school senior thesis on the plans put in place to ensure the Fukushima disaster would not happen at that plant."

"I'm sure the secondary pumps are plenty capable of handling the reactor until the main pumps are repaired or just turned back on."

- Borderlandsman

Happy Cat

"If your cat chews on fresh eucalyptus, they might start hallucinating and fall over repeatedly, leading to a $400 emergency vet bill just to be told she’s just kinda high."

- oddidealstronghold

"And, that's part of why koalas love it. Little stoners."

- littlebluefoxy

Archaeology: Do Not Lick

"Old human bones are very porous, so if you lick them, they’ll stick to your tongue."

- clanculcarius

Sharing is Caring

"A pigeon will only eat a Starburst if you chew it up a little bit first. Just to clarify: chew the Starburst, not the pigeon."

- OhTheHueManatee

"Instructions unclear. Pigeon unhappy."

- Wild-Lychee-3312

Intriguing Anatomy

"Everyone is here with the creepy crime stuff, and I'm just like, 'A soft fur rat has 22 nipples.'"

- horroscoblue

"Okay, so either they have really small nipples, their nipples overlap, or they have nipples in places where there shouldn't be nipples."

"(I've never written the word 'nipples' so many times in a singular sentence before.)"

- GdeGraaf

'Don't Ask Me,' Indeed!

"Turmeric can be used as clothes dye. It is capable of permanently dyeing cotton cloth even after it has passed through the digestive tract of an adult male."

- SlefeMcDichael

"You s**t your pants, didn't you?"

- PMmecrossstitch

"I'd prefer not to answer that question."

- SlefeMcDichael

High-Risk Survival Skills

"If you ever trying to survive in the Arctic, don’t eat polar bear liver. It is so high in vitamin A, it will kill you."

- WrongWayCorrigan-361

"It's also surrounded by a lethal amount of angry polar bear."

- horanc2

Real-Life Spies

"TV shows and movies go out of their way to make military/intelligence officers look bada**."

"But real-life 'spies,' by design and training, are boring. They have regular houses and standard second-hand cars, they dress down, and they have vague, boring job titles (accounts receivable) as cover, and they do not draw attention to themselves. Most come from specialized academia."

- Ok_Worth_1093

Haunting Reality

"Your muscles can keep twitching for several hours after you die."

- JustDave62

"Also, beards can appear to grow. This is however not because the beard itself grows but because the skin shrinks."

- RRautamaa

"I worked at a morgue for over eight years. If you grasp the hand of a dead body to move the arm, the hand will grasp back, but that's just muscles and tendons reacting to the tension."

- goneferalinid

The Sneakiness of Drowning

"When a drowning victim is revived, get them to a hospital as soon as possible. Drowning is the leading cause of death of kids from the age of one to seven and is ruled as accidental drowning when it comes to secondary drowning or dry drowning."

"Basically, your lungs are full of water despite being revived. Your lungs will absorb the liquid, but not before your body acidifies from high levels of carbon dioxide. The only chance to survive is to have the lungs pumped with oxygen via CPAP machine and time."

"Also, drowning is extremely quiet. You don’t hear the victim go under. And if you see flailing, do not attempt to save the victim otherwise you’ll become another drowning victim. Throw them a lifeline and hope their amygdala realizes that a rope or something is floating near them and grabs on it."

- Dfiggsmeister

Not Everyone's Favorite Chocolate

"Hershey’s chocolate has the strong smell of vomit or feces to some people (me), and that’s because they use butyric acid as a preservative. Butyric acid is the compound that makes vomit smell so bad."

"Edit: Digging further into it, there are some claims that they may not be “adding” the butyric acid, but rather it is occurring from essentially spoiling the milk in their milk chocolate. Either way, the butyric acid and putrid smell remains a part of their product."

- hefewiseman1

"That explains the weird aftertaste I always get! I don’t smell it but their chocolate always has this super unpleasant sharp/acidic aftertaste that I find repulsive. I assume this is why!!"

- PomegranateNo975

Do Not Lick the Asbestos

"Asbestos tastes like chalk. And if you lick it, it has the texture of extremely gritty sandpaper. Which is actually the feeling of microscopic asbestos needles piercing your flesh!"

- TooYoungToBeThisOld1

Mapping Out the War

"Beginning in 1911 in anticipation of the outbreak of WW1 in 1914, two statesmen, one from England and one from France, began visiting locations in France that they believed would be the settings for a number of major battles that would occur during the great war."

"Long bike rides through these future battle zones in the countryside and weeks spent building a foundation for a French-Anglo codebook that would later prove important in helping win the war."

- fjordperfect123

Avoiding Lawsuits > Protecting Patients

"Doctors, or surgeons more specifically, that make too many mistakes during surgery, ie, leaving instruments in patients, frequently gets ‘quietly traded’ to other hospitals where they continue their path of destruction with the patients not being aware of their past record. Hospitals tend to keep quiet about the matter to avoid lawsuits."

- Kittytigris

Bonus Points: Do This While Having Lunch in Your Car

"If you overfill a fast food gravy cup and then put a lid on, it will create a pressurized gravy stream that sprays all over your face and uniform while your coworker looks on in horror."

- thechaosjester776

This subReddit thread was so a roller-coaster of random facts, we've surely all walked away learning something.

But the biggest takeaway might just be: Maybe don't lick so many things.

Shocked woman covering her mouth
vaitheeswaran Nataraj/Unsplash

When we're intoxicated, or even the slightest bit tipsy from having a little too much to drink, our immediate perspective on things is hazy.

But there's nothing like a bit of alarming news or a jarring incident to snap us out of the fog and focus on the moment.

Sometimes alcohol isn't always to blame for our impairment.

It can be a state of mind, like a perpetual numbness from being complacent in life, and all it takes is one shocking moment to rattle us back to our senses.

Curious to hear from strangers online about this type of scenario, Redditor Known_Challenge_7150 asked:

"What’s one thing that sobered you up real quick?"

These individuals were witness to shocking events that sobered them up right quick.

Bleeding Out

"Got out of a taxi and found a naked man profusely bleeding from his head crawling up the driveway in my condo. Called him an ambulance completely forgot I was absolutely wasted until 45 minutes later when I'd helped him translate and in to an amublance and stepped in my front door."

"Later a few days later learned he'd slipped in the tub and literally crawled out for help. Poor dude. He was fine but I genuinely thought he was going to die there."

– DongLaiCha

Tragic News

"At a bachelor party and we got a phone call that the groom’s father had suddenly passed."

– accountnameredacted

Bottom Of The Barrel

"I went to visit my parents back in July. I was homeless and deep into fentanyl addiction so I lost a lot of weight. My folks could see it. They knew something was up. Anyway, I spent the night and I was getting ready to leave in the morning and I looked at myself in the mirror for a good long time. I finally had enough and told them everything. They took me to detox, from there I went to rehab. Graduated in August and been living with them ever since then. I have 160 days clean and sober."

– Crotch-Monster

A reality check can be enough for some people to snap out of it.

Like Father, Like Son

"Was driving a drunk friend home, he had been on a bender again and was smart enough to call me for a lift rather than try and drive. As I helped in to his house his mother came down the stairs and said 'your as drunk as your father' and went back upstairs. I haven't seen him drunk since then, he still drinks but the thought of turning into his dad scared him out of hard drinking."

– psycospaz

Busted

"Flashing blue lights."

– FiddleOfGold

"This sobered me up just thinking about it."

– redmaple_syrup

Losing Sight

"Woke up to no sight in one eye. I had cataract surgery so just thought one of the lenses had slipped and it was an easy fix. Eye doc says nope, you had a stroke. I loved soy sauce, teriyaki sauce and salty food, which caused high blood pressure, which caused retina damage. Over six months was able to get most of my eyesight back with medication, and all back within a year. Trying to navigate life with one eye was very sobering. Started taking HBP much more seriously."

– MissHibernia

Quitting The Bottle

"Looked up someone I went to highschool with who was an awesome guy. Found out he had been dead for 3 years from alcoholism, at age 33. I made an overnight change. I hadn't started drinking that night yet, 10 months ago. Haven't touched it again since."

– omgtater

These disturbing moments were enough for Redditors to immediately come to their senses.

Unplanned House Guests

"Me and a buddy Woke up in someone’s living room, realized neither one of us knew the people, they were just nice and let 2 drunk guys sleep on their living room floor. We didn’t even say goodbye."

– Oneinsevenbillion75

Serious Health Warning

"Elevated liver enzymes."

"And the knowledge that this sh** was gonna kill me and I just couldn't orphan my family over it."

"So I opted for recovery, instead."

"Clean and sober since June 5, 2009."

– Far_Meal8674

The Joyride

"Grew up in a rural area. The little town hosted dances at the hockey arena, everyone (adults and kids) went and they overserved everyone, regardless of age. I was maybe 16 or 17 and was absolutely sh*tfaced, and jumped in the back of someone's truck with about 8 other people to go back to someone's cottage for after dance drinking. The driver (still don't know who it was) started racing one of his buddies and we whipped around small dirt roads, flying around blind corners on the wrong side of the road, going god knows how fast. It was basically a disaster waiting to happen. It was crazy scary and I was sober and thankful to be alive when we finally arrived."

– foxfood9116

The human psyche is a fascinating thing, isn't it?

How we can automatically focus on something urgent at a crucial time, even after getting buzzed from drinking too much alcohol.

But as we're in the thick of the holidays, it's a good reminder to drink responsibly and stay off the roads if you drive to your celebratory destination.

Cheers. Stay safe. And happy holidays.

Woman holding multiple shopping bags
Photo by freestocks on Unsplash

We've all complained or vented about something in our lives which, in the grand scheme of things, wasn't exactly a problem, or is very easily solved.

Then there are those who complain about things that others almost hope will happen to them at some point in their lives.

These are known as "first world problems", as they are problems that pretty much only the world's one percent faces.

From having to fly business class instead of first class, or being served Roederer instead of Dom Pérignon, these complaints are often met with amusement, bewilderment, or even anger.

Redditor jennimackenzie was curious to hear the most absurd "first world problems" anyone ever complained about, leading them to ask:

"What’s the most ridiculous 'first world problem' you’ve seen people get worked up over?"

"Tale As Old As Time..."

"I once knew a mom who was legitimately devastated, to the point of tears/grief, because a doctor predicted her 8 year old daughter's final height to be around 5'2","

"Which wasn't tall enough to get cast as Belle at Disney World."

"That was the child's (and her mother's) only dream in life, apparently."

"Didn't appreciate my suggestion that she could be Minnie or Mickey."

"Lol!"

"Only a face character would do!"- TravelLovingMom

"Must Be Funny, In A Rich Man's World..."

"My boss from about a decade ago was this insanely rich dude who always went to the bank to get fresh and crisp currency."

"He'd call the bank in advance to make sure they had some on hand."

"I think he was a germaphobe."

"He had a trash can that he'd throw $1 and $5 bills in that he thought was 'dirty' and regularly just donated it vs spending it."

"I asked him why he did this and he said it was too much trouble and asked if I wanted it."

"I said f*ck yeah dumped it into my bag and when I got home it was close to $400 in singles and fives.

"Another time, he wanted to upgrade all the computers in his studio, so we went to a store and bought 10 PCs."

"They all had $150 mail in rebates and he wasn't bothered to go through the trouble of mailing them in."

"3 weeks later I received $1500 after spending a whole afternoon filling out all those goddamn forms."- azninvasion2000

Money Burn GIF by nog Giphy

Who Wore It Better?

"When I was about 19 years old, I was at my boyfriends family BBQ."

"I was wearing this pretty floral sundress."

"His cousins girlfriend showed up in the same dress and she was SO mad that she went and changed."

"I will never understand being upset when someone is wearing the same thing as you.'

"Did you really think that your shirt you bought off the rack is going to be unique to you?"

"No."- mertsey627

Seeing Red! Or Blue In This Case...

"The blue of the balloons wasn't quite the same as the bridesmaid's sashes."

"Years ago my wife and I attended a wedding."

"It was very low key."

"The dinner was in the dining hall at the university where the couple met, cinder block walls and all."

"It was a Baptist wedding - no booze and very serious."

"The dark blue balloons attempting to liven up the hall were a slightly darker shade of blue than the sashes on the bridesmaid's dresses."

"The bride lost here sh*t and absolutely raved for nearly an hour."

"I can't remember how they finally managed to talk her down."- mechant_papa

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See You In Court!

"Rich neighbors who end up in expensive court battles because they disagree about where a tree can be planted or whether the color of a fence fits in with the street’s 'amenity'."

'These disputes get really heated and rack up huge lawyers’ bills."

"The most pathetic part is after the judgement when they are arguing about who should pay the other party’s costs."

"Lots of affidavits filed citing the 'emotional distress' they had to endure, or painting themselves as brave warriors who were forced to take a stand to fight for 'justice'."

"Also lots of pompous litigants insisting that the judge refer to them by their 'Dr' title."

"An absolutely insane dumpster fire of entitled rich people problems."- ElectrocRaisin

It's Always People With Money Who Don't Want To Pay!

"I work in a public library."

"People will get so so mad if they have to be put on a wait list for a book."

"A popular book that just came out."

"Ok our services are not only free but so are the books."

"You’re welcome, a**holes."- Switchbladekitten

A Warm Butt Is A Happy Butt!

"My own."

"We have a bidet toilet seat (Fabulous! Everyone should have one!) and not only does it wash your bum and blow dry it, but the seat's heated!"

"It's shocking how much a heated toilet seat makes the whole process more agreeable."

"Except: We had a power outage and I went to use the toilet and the seat was cold!"

"Unacceptable!"

"This shall not stand!"

"I was really upset because it didn't feel good."

"Then I stopped and thought: This is the most first-world problem anyone's ever had."

"I was really pissed because my heiny was tepid."

"I got over it."- DeathGrover

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Holy Matrimony!

"Weddings are a gold mine for this question."

"People get so hyped up over their 'most important day of their life'."

"They'll destroy friendships, go into debt, and have crazy expectations."

"It's not always the couple who go crazy, either."

"Sometimes, it's the parents or another family member who feels entitled to control the wedding."

"It's just a party."

"Be considerate of guests, have plenty of food and drinks, and enjoy it."- magicrowantree

When Fast Food Isn't Fast Enough...

"Having to pull off to the side to wait for a drive-thru order to be brought out to you because your food isn't ready and there's a line building up behind you."- demanbmore

In Case You Don't Think Customer Service Employees Are Undervalued...

"I was working the return desk at a Target next to a military base so I have so many stories."

"One of my favorites was a lady who had her baby shower before revealing the gender and was livid that she had received floral newborn diapers when she’s having a boy."

"It was a huge box of super expensive, all organic diapers, that we didn’t carry and therefore could not return."

"I cannot accurately express her fury and disgust."

"How dare either suggest her boy could wear feminine diapers."

"I suggested she donate them if she didn’t want to use them and she instead threw away the entire box."

"When she left we pulled it out and threw it in our donate bin."

"There have also been multiple times where mom’s order massive toys and when we bring them out to the car they get furious that they aren’t wrapped."

"We don’t offer wrapping services."

"Here’s the thing, if you don’t want your kids to see the toys you got them for Christmas or their bit to day DON'T BRING THE CHILD WHEN YOU PICK IT UP."

'I’ve had multiple women scream and curse me out that I had ruined their kids Christmas by bringing the toys they ordered out to the car like they requested."- clever-mermaid-mae

Customer Service Waiting GIF by Juno Calypso Giphy

Happiest Place On Earth!

"I used to work for Disney."

"That in itself should tell you everything."

"However for fun I'll give you two specific stories one form our tech department and one from my wife who worked bookings."

"I specifically worked for their call center to help with technical issues with magic band and the website."

"Suddenly got worse huh?"

"A right of passage call everyone has at least one story of is the 'Dome call'."

"Basically there is a subset of Disney Guest (TM) that believes if it rains at Walt Disney world there is someone that will push a button to encapsulate the whole of Disney property in a dome to keep out the rain."

"I'm not kidding."

"If this button is not pushed they call our tech department to angrily ask why."

"My wife worked booking."

"Pretty much everything including Bibbidi Bobbidi boutique and Pirate's league."

"These two things did roughly the same thing difference being price and theme."

"BBB was expensive did more and was focused on princesses, pirates league did a bit less and focused on mermaids and pirates."

"Lady called up my wife, and got pissed about BBB being booked up (It goes FAAAAST)."

"Karen: 'Im going to give the phone to my daughter and I want you to tell her how you are ruining her vacation by not letting her do BBB'."

"Wife proceeds to explain how pirate's league is so much cooler and how she can be a mermaid or pirate and basically gets the kid to start demanding to their parents about how they want to be a mermaid instead of a princess."- trollsong

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The horror!

Being booked into a junior suite at Disney World instead of an executive suite!

It's almost as bad as having no money for groceries, or no food to feed you children...

Said absolutely no one.