People Describe The Worst Teacher They've Ever Had
Everyone believes they have a calling.
It's good to have that passion. But sometimes it can be a universal miscommunication.
There are people out there that believe wholeheartedly that they are destined for the profession they are in and that is simply not true.
One of our most important life careers is being an educator.
But we really need to weed out those that are not up to par.
Redditor Not_JackMania wanted to discuss the educators you've been effected by, in not the best ways by asking:
"Dear students of Reddit, what the worst teacher you've ever had?"
"Well let me give you a cookie."
"A math teacher that also worked with the cheerleaders. The teacher gave EXTREMELY preferential treatment to the cheerleaders. They got out of class anytime for any reason. No homework on their menses (we all knew because they would tell the teacher directly while in class), but the other girls in class would complain about not receiving the same treatment. The teacher was highly disorganized and rarely actually TAUGHT anything, it was mostly 'Do this page in class, do this page for homework.'"Giphy
"She would gather the cheerleaders at her desk during class for little pow-wows on hemp lotion (MLM in school I kid you not). Went in one day after struggling on problems and said, 'Look I figured it out."'Her response? 'Well let me give you a cookie.'"
"Got sent to detention for telling her to screw herself. She also called me out twice in class for being a Pagan. She really liked to harp on that. Later on she was fired for having sex in her classroom (not with a student though). Vindication at last. I hope she never works with school aged children again."
From the Book....
"High school in the mid 80s. I took the school's first ever computer class, taught by the gym teacher. She read straight from the book. If the book was wrong (and it was wrong a lot) then she was wrong and we had to answer wrong on the test or fail."
Yes She Can.
"Grade 9 science teacher told us that physics and chemistry used to be harder but they had to make the subjects easier so that girls could do it."
Mr. T got busted.
"In HS the top three crappy teachers were Mr. T, whose freshman daughter walked in on him banging his senior TA. 2nd was Mr. B, who would chug vodka from a chemistry flask, stagger out of the supply closet, put on a nature film, and pass out on the back counter and snore louder than the movie. When the bell rang, we just got up and went to our next class with him still snoring away."
"Lastly, Mr. R, who would go out to his car between classes to get baked, then come back in and spend the entire class hitting on senior girls. Mr. T was fired on the spot and was replaced by a substitute, the other two were fired a few years later I heard. There were other crappy teachers (both male and female) there who were also rumored to be banging students that quietly got jobs elsewhere right after Mr. T got busted."
It's Just a B.
"I had a teacher who gave me a D when I was in 1st grade. I was 6 years old. I then had this teacher again in 4th grade. She nearly failed me. These were my only grades below a B, but this teacher had me believing that I was genuinely stupid for the majority of my time in elementary school. I was extremely discouraged and essentially decided school had no value to me."
"I finally learned to value school after working terrible jobs (landscaping, McDonalds, etc). I paid my way through college and eventually graduated summa cum laude. I give no credit to a teacher who makes a child believe he is stupid. That is the opposite of the role of an educator."
Forget you, Mrs.Blume.
"Locked me in a cardboard box a la Matilda on a weekly basis, kept me in every recess, screamed at me every day in front of the class, calling me stupid and yelling at the rest of the class not to act like me."
"I had add and was suicidal at the time, and was already socially ostracized because I was much poorer than most of my peers. I was 8. Forget you, Mrs.Blume. You're the reason why every time I see a 'teachers are the best human's stuff it makes me want to punch a wall. I hope you get stomach cancer and die alone and scared."
"sun people and moon people"
"My 1st grade teacher was extremely racist. She practiced something called 'sun people and moon people' that she read in some book. She made half the class sun people and half the class moon people. The sun people consisted of all the African American kids in the class and some of the white females."
"The rest of the class were the moon people. The sun people got to have privileges like extended recess, bathroom breaks, were not required to pick up after themselves, and were treated with respect."
"The moon people had to come in early from recess and 'tidy up' the classroom, were not allowed bathroom breaks, and were treated very poorly. I remember one day a boy had an accident (because he wasn't allowed to use the bathroom all day) and she completely lost it. I remember her screaming, 'Uh-uh. You are not going to pee on my floor! You are disgusting! Moon people, clean this pee off my floor.' And she made all us 'moon kids' get on the floor with spray cleaner and paper towels and clean the floor. We had a new teacher the next day."
Hands Off my Stuff....
"My early primary school English language teacher. She was generally rude to everyone, but she hated my guts especially because I spoke better English than her and she always marked me wrong for spelling words the British way instead of the American way, even though she knew they were still correct. She would confiscate my personal belongings for no reason and refuse to give them back."
"I still remember this one time I was fiddling with my collection of silly bandz (I had nearly fifty) under the desk, and after confiscating them, she refused to give them back to me because she'd, quote 'already mixed them in with all the other ones I've taken, and as I don't know which ones are yours, I won't be giving them back.'"
"This was said several days later after I'd still not gotten them back and my parents had gone up to confront her about it. My 8-year-old self was heartbroken. She was fired several years later."
Get to Therapy...
"7th grade; mans didn't understand the concept of 'this kid is seriously depressed, let him go to therapy halfway through class' he didn't think I was actually depressed because I was always smiling (fake smile) he would give me detentions without my knowledge while i was at therapy, and refuse to give me the work/instruction that was said during half the class period that I was at therapy; he would give me Cs when I would actually make As. he would call me out/use me as examples (not the biggest fan of unwanted attention)."Giphy
"The man literally had a lecture about how kids can't get depressed because they don't have to deal with adult hardships because of me, and it was basically 10 slides of situations and sentences taken out of context, he finished with a picture of me (using me as an example) and said I was faking for attention and an excuse to skip class. I stood up and said all the reasons I've been diagnosed with severe depression, none of which were listed in his lecture."
Mrs. Benson Blues.
"Third grade teacher. I had ADHD undiagnosed at the time (later formally diagnosed) and she hated my guts. I never understood it, she would constantly call me out and be overly cruel. She also almost made me pee my pants because she wouldn't let me go. She once made me sit on a big carpet and look up a word I had said in a dictionary, for over an hour."
"When I said I couldn't find it, she yelled in my face that then I shouldn't say it. I loved school before then, but I severely declined after that and it wasn't until adulthood that I began to love learning again. She'll never see this, but screw you, Mrs Benson."
On the flip side....
"Not currently a student, but when I was, I had a first grade teacher who--whenever she caught me chatting with another student when I was supposed to be listening--would yank on my ear."
"On the flip side, in 10th grade I was in the hospital for a few weeks. Once I returned to school, my Language Arts teacher stayed after school every day to help me catch up until I was back on track with the other students in the class."
"Substitute teacher for my astronomy class. She was old fashioned and her punishments were a little outdated. I came late to class because I was doing a yearbook assignment and had a slip from my teacher that explained why I was late. We had just done a quiz and they were done but she hadn't collected it. She accused me of cheating and then made me sit outside the classroom to do the test."
"She then went back inside and gave out a new assignment. She said everyone in that classroom was being awful and made them stay for lunch. She sent me to the principals office and my class walked out on her. I had a really sweet guy and a few of my friends come in to defend me. It doesn't really seem that bad looking back on it now but at the time she was not pleasant."
Love a PowerPointer!
"My current professor in my nursing program. My cohort is made of of 74 students and we all have her for the same class. Not one person has anything positive to say about this woman. During lecture she only reads the PowerPoint slides as they are without elaborating or teaching about the subjects of the slides. She then tries to relate what the topic of the slides are to her clinical experience in the hospital."
"But her stories are convoluted, distracting from the actual topic, and very off tangent. She basically talks about herself as gods gift to anyone who has had her as a nurse. She it by far the biggest narcissist I have ever encountered. I have never met anyone who has thought so highly of themselves before."
"When it comes time for her exams, many students do very poorly because the material on the exams are often not covered in her lecture. There is almost zero relation of what she says in class and the questions she asks on the exam. Reading the chapters multiple times has proven to be an ineffective method in preparation for her exams. When students go to her office hours for help, she never gives any rational to any answers on exams or slide questions."
"She says to read the book. Many of us question her knowledge of the subject she is teaching. It becomes suspect when not even a theory can be given. I understand the concept of students learning on their own, but she can't even point the ones seeking help in the right direction. On a side note, she claims she can smell a patient bleeding internally. Internally?!"
"Neutron physics professor. When we asked what the best way to study for the test was, he said to take the test since we would all end up failing the first time anyways. And he averaged the tests so we could theoretically never get an A unless we guessed right and studied exactly what he would test on. BTW this is for grad school which means that anything lower than a B can get you kicked out."
She was just a terrible human.
"My 2nd Grade teacher. I always had terrible penmanship, but we had to write a report on a book about an animal. I picked penguins. The next day she called me up in front of the class. She said my report was so bad and illegible that she was going to have to tell the principal and that I was going to be expelled."
"From 2nd grade. I bawled my eyes out because I thought I was going to never be allowed to go to school again and knew I'd get whooped when I got home. She told a 2nd grader that he was going to get kicked out of school because of penmanship. She was just a terrible human."
"Fluid dynamics professor. On an exam he had a true/false section. +1 for correct, -2 for wrong or empty."
"An inviscid fluid means it has zero viscosity. About 2/3 of the class marked true. He marked it wrong for everyone because "you only assume a fluid is inviscid." I sent him scans from the textbook, the Merriam Webster dictionary definition, and the Oxford dictionary definition. He would not budge for anyone. Some of my aero friends laughed at the dude."
Hey Mrs. Johnson...
"Fourth grade. My glasses broke but not to big of a deal bc I sat in the front row. She moved me to the back of the class. She would write assignments on the board and wouldn't read it off. Told the girl next to me she was NOT allowed to tell me what it said and told me my parents needed to get my glasses fixed. I couldn't make my parents do that.. it was rough. Hey Mrs Johnson... forget you. It's been 24 and this still upsets me."
Bless you Father...
"For context. I went to catholic school in 90s'. In 7th grade, there was this kid named Patrick that was a little "slower" than the rest of us. The teacher hated Patrick, mildly bullied him whenever possible. I don't remember what the trigger was, but one day the teacher just lost his mind and sort of half choked, slammed Patrick up against the chalkboard. Lifting him completely off the ground."
"Gym teacher in high school. Roided up and dumb as a rock. Refused to sign off on doctors notes students would bring in to be excused from gym class. Which was interesting when he did it to a girl on crutches. To this day one of the biggest fools I've ever encountered."
"Or the math professor I had in college who was a brilliant guy and had degrees and awards coming out his butt but he was a God awful teacher and had less than zero people skills. That class was absolutely brutal."
"Health and safety teacher, late 50s early 60s maybe, he was very much like Ozzy Osbourne, stutter, forget unforgettable things, begin to vacantly stare into space sometimes half way through conversation."Giphy
"Worst of all was the contradiction, oh lord. He would say "write this down, this is the best answer/ explanation for this question" then skip 20 mins forward to when he was marking the questions and a melt down would ensue because we wrote the wrong answer and he didn't know where we possibly could of got it from."
Who died now?
"In third grade I had a teacher named Mrs. Wilson. My grandpa had died that year and I took it really hard. Couldn’t focus in school. Broke down and started crying in class because I missed him. My parents took me out of school for a week to collect everything and calm everything down. When I returned to school Mrs Wilson had the audacity to say to me “you’ve been gone for a week. Who died now?'"
"making him feel bad"
"My fifth grade teacher threatened to suspend me because I openly stated I didn't want to be partners with my bully, and according to her I was 'making him feel bad' despite him also wanting nothing to do with me. F**k you Mrs Young. She was only in her like 3rd year of teaching and was already a *itch."
“yes, but then you get a B”
"In 8th grade, first week of school, art class. The teacher introduced herself, admitted she wasn’t an art teacher and only took the job for extra money, and told the class if they wanted an A they had to copy a piece out of an art book. Another student asked if they could create their own piece, and the teacher replied 'yes, but then you get a B.' I dropped out the same week and did homeschooling. I am now studying fine arts in College, with much more qualified instructors!"
"Had a high school Spanish teacher who had big fake breasts and she played favorites with everyone. If you kissed her a** and were one of the cool kids, good grades. If you were weird or not into her, she failed your a**."
"Math teacher. He told me in front of the class that I was too stupid to get my degree."
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Until we're in a situation, we'll never really know how we'll react.
I have been in this scenario, though.
Sex matters. And people rarely want to admit how much.
But sex isn't a lifetime guarantee.
It fades, as does love.
It's important to speak about it.
It can be a fixable situation.
A relationship without sex may not be the end of the world, but it's definitely a sign that something is off.
Redditor Deviant55 wanted to talk about physical intimacy in relationships, so they asked:
"How important is sex to you in a relationship? Could you be with someone you love even if sex was off the table indefinitely?"
I learned how much sex matters in my last relationship.
Once I wasn't interested, it kind of killed everything.
ForeverGIF by moodmanGiphy
"When my wife of 30+ years became too ill for sex to be even remotely interesting for her, I certainly did not end the relationship. I loved her and I took care of her until she died. No other course even occurred to me."
"When I met my wife we couldn’t keep our hands off each other. This lasted a few years. I was in my mid-twenties when we married. She developed a chronic medical issue. I’ve gone twenty years being sexually frustrated. There are stages and phases to this."
"What I came to realize is that I love my wife. Yes, sex is important in our relationship. But I would rather have her in my life with no sex than have sex without her."
"The thing is, I love her. She can’t help her situation. I can’t help it. One deals with it. Marriage is more than sex. It is building a life and memories, raising a family, and loving each other regardless of the challenges life throws our way. But sex is very important. It helps keep the closeness and the emotional bond. But it isn’t the only thing that does that."
I Love Her
"It is complicated. I am in a near-sexless marriage. The wife needs antidepressants to function. And it kills her libido. So usually it is four to six times a year. My libido rages. And yeah, it sucks. I dream of more sex."
"But I love the chick. She loves me to the moon and back. I’m not willing to sacrifice her love so I can try dating again. Divorce rates these days? And I found a woman who more than tolerates me, she loves me. I’ll stay. And not to be crude but yeah I masturbate. A lot. She doesn’t begrudge me that. Occasionally she even encourages it."
"She went off her meds for a while. And man did we do it. But she was a mess. I need her healthy more than I need a shag. We travel together. We enjoy each other’s company. We actually like each other. I could claim that it is hell, but I choose to see all of the good I am blessed with."
"Quite important. But I think it depends on where you are in the relationship. I've been married for 10 years. I have kids. If my wife suddenly couldn't have sex with me for some reason -- illness or injury or something -- I'm not divorcing her over it. That's heartless."
"Now, if she just decided we weren't ever having sex again because she didn't feel like it, that'd be different. Or if I was just starting to date someone and they told me they'd never have sex, I probably just wouldn't keep pursuing the relationship. Plenty of people out there who will."
"It depends on the circumstances. I LOVE doing it with my man but I love his heart and soul more. If we had to stop having sex for medical reasons or something I’d definitely stay with him and stay faithful. If I was single, I think it’s unlikely I’d start a new relationship knowing it would be sex free."
Heart and soul is just as necessary and hot and sweaty.
At least a lot of people recognize that.
"Sex life is 10% of a relationship when it’s good and 90% of a relationship when it’s bad."
"The other way I've heard it put is that sex is like the bathroom in your house. It's not the only reason you bought the house, but if it's not working it's a big problem."
"50-year-old here married for 27 years. It’s not important. It was important when we were younger but honestly, if sex wasn’t possible I would still love my wife and really nothing about our day would really change."
"I’ve been reading these comments and wishing that everyone’s age was flared on their post because I sense that there are a lot of under-60-year-olds. I am older than my wife but she is starting menopause and I can see the writing on the wall. Not super thrilled but I love her completely and understand. The real intimacy is in how we still (and will always) want to sleep touching each other and waking up next to each other."
"I honestly considered this before. I absolutely adored this guy. It was like a child relationship; we'd kiss and cuddle and hold hands and things, but he wouldn't have sex with me, nor would he commit properly. Any time we came close to sex, he'd go soft or back off."
"I couldn't understand it, wondered if I could keep doing that. My sex drive was wild. Why kiss and the rest but not sex?"
"Then one day he told me he was in love with me and asked me out properly. I said yes there and then, had a wonderful day with him, but when I went home, I was left questioning if I could possibly live without sex. I decided that yeah, I loved him but it would be tough."
"We had sex the next day. So yes, I think I probably could."
"It's very important. I'm a very affectionate and physical person and touch/caresses and anything physical is one of my love languages. I couldn't function with someone who is the opposite of me or who's uncomfortable with how I am. I already was in a relationship with someone who wasn't that touchy/affectionate and it created frustration for both of us."
Don't Look at Me
"I am in a sexless relationship. He has erectile dysfunction and I really don't like sex in general. I'm really uncomfortable naked or even vulnerable. I'm shy around him despite the relationship being 10 years nearly, I'm even shy around my family and friends. Everything about sex makes me feel so embarrassed, and I feel nothing but negative feelings when I used to be sexually active. Not through choice of partner, I just hate that sort of attention."
Definitive!Shake Handshake GIF by OriginalsGiphy
"10/10. Sexual incompatibility is a deal breaker!"
Sex is important but not everything.
Until it is everything if it becomes an issue.
Good luck couples. Open and honest communication is key.
People Share The Moment They Realized Their Friends Were Actually A-Holes
An important contributor to our overall health and happiness is the quality of our friendships.
We may not have a lot of friends, but the more important factor is the depth of those relationships.
But we've all had one of those friends who turned out not to be a very good friend at all.
Redditor Both-Support-7110 asked:
"When did you realize your 'friends' were just a**holes?"
Putting Them Down
"After I realized that other people don't s**t on each other on every possible occasion in their circle."
"And that it isn't right when a 'friend' uses every known insecurity as an argument against you when you do not behave the way he/she would want you to."
"I luckily made a couple of friends that would just be supportive about stuff. So I slowly started talking to them more than my older friends as I saw the disparity between their responses."
"One side purely would be purely judgmental and try and bring me down, and the other would just be excited for me or be there to listen or whatever. Who wants to talk to the former when you have the latter?"
Using Them as a Convenience
"They only bothered with me when it suited them. I'd rather have nobody than have to deal with that."
Trying to Keep Them Small
"When they were nice at first but then cut me out of conversations, telling me not to 'butt in.' A friend doesn't dictate when you're allowed to speak."
"Total a**hole move to have conversations in front of you only to tell you it doesn’t concern you and mean it. . . Like making plans and giving details about how someone like you could be included but specifically telling you not to invite yourself; making plans in front of someone and not inviting them is awful."
Using Them as Entertainment
"She got a boyfriend and would let him listen to our phone calls and not tell me, even if I was crying about personal stuff that I would only ever tell her."
"Then they both started lying to me about my crush liking me back, forcing both him and me into awkward positions (telling everyone we liked each other so they'd play along, swapping places constantly to make us sit next to each other, pressuring him into giving me a lap dance, making him kiss the prettiest girl in the room, etc), and encouraged me to shoot my shot more and more."
"All the while they knew he didn't like me, he had told them both directly. One night, I was crying on the phone because I was so confused why my advances weren't working, and they just kept explaining it away, blaming some other bulls**t reason and telling me to try again."
"The next day, they told me they were laughing throughout the whole call because I didn't get it and I was so upset. I should add I had no dating experience at all and nobody had ever liked me at this point."
Using Them to Feel Superior
"I didn't have many friends in grade school, but the times the kids actually gave me the time of day, it was to make me 'it' when we'd play tag. That's what I was there for. To continuously be 'it' so they could run away and feel superior. Because they knew I would agree to it no matter what."
Having Questionable Morals
"I had a friend that was a very promiscuous girl, I had no issue with that, until I found out she was using me and my innocent personality then, to distract her mom and make her think she was like me."
"Then she used my house as a literal hotel once, with my family here and everything... I knew that was it."
Making Fun of Them
"When I made new friends and realized that it's not normal for friends to constantly beat on me and make fun of me."
Prioritizing Money Over Them
"When they stopped being my friends after I went through a rough financial patch."
"I had a group that I was in from 2019-2021. They became a**holes over time, and it took me longer to see that. It was when I failed my psych 101 class (I'm not the best with online classes and tried the best I could) and when they heard about that, they laughed to my face, called me stupid and a failure."
"Early 2022, I met up with them again thinking it would just be a 'listen to this concert for someone we all know and go on our ways' thing."
"My one closer friend offered to drive me and I accepted, and then afterward she joined the group, made eye contact after the concert was done and said, 'bye,' and left with them to the doors. They doubled back and said, 'You can come with us to another town to a friend's place or I can get my mom to drive you home.'"
"I was so overwhelmed and embarrassed that I just went with them to the other town. I called my brother to come to pick me up after an hour, and when he was on his way out, everyone else left. Haven't been into contact with them again after that."
Disappearing When It Counts
"They pretty much abandoned me in a time of pretty intense need. It solidified my decision to leave the area and go do something worthwhile."
No Reciprocation Allowed
"When he does s**t to me and acts like it’s no big deal, but then I do the same back, and he gets offended."
Excluding Them From Plans
"I've got two examples here. One from childhood and one from adulthood. Pick your favorite."
"Childhood: Kid I knew when I was 8 or so. We used to hang out a lot of the time and often played together, doing the usual kid stuff. Then one day, he has to move away because of a change in his parent's financial situation and I was pretty bummed out about it."
"On the last day we were supposed to see each other, he hung out with someone else instead and when tried to join them, he physically shoved me away and told me I wasn't welcome. That one stung."
"Adulthood: When they keep telling me about plans they made and things they did together or wanted to do together, but never bother to invite or include me in any of it. There's one of them I get along with and he'll invite me to things as long as it's just with him, but when he's with the group, he excludes me."
"I remember one example in particular where they were discussing a new site to do some photography and they fell short a man. One of them looks at me like I'm the spare tire in his car and goes: 'I guess you can come with us this one time.', to which another replies: 'Nah, he doesn't want to go. He doesn't like photography.'"
"I told him I was perfectly capable of answering for myself and didn't need him to act as my answering machine, but it lost a lot of impact because he was right. I don't like photography and didn't want to go. I just didn't like being talked about that way."
"Good luck making that clear to them, though. All they heard was: 'If he was right anyway, then why are you b*tching about it?'"
"I no longer hang out with them. I eventually got sick of being treated like the spare guy they can use in case none of the 'main crew' was attending, so I dropped them."
"In 2006, my then-best friend wanted to go to a big German metal festival. I did not want to go because my Dad had end-stage cancer."
"Dad died on August 8th, a couple of days after my friend returned from the festival. I called him because I needed someone to talk to."
"He very bluntly stated that he had no interest in my Dad's passing but wanted to tell me how great the festival was."
"You can't imagine how disappointed I was. For years, I'd been there for him whenever he got dumped, and the one time I needed a friend, he wasn't there for me. I told him to shut my door from the outside and lose my number."
"I was 15, we were hanging out in the alleyway behind my friend’s house as we did almost every day after school."
"One girl was there from the year above us and they started prank calling the child protective services emergency line, pretending to be a child in distress, and they all laughed."
"After a few rounds of this, I felt queasy and left. Never hung out with them again. I still feel bad for not saying something or putting a stop to it, but the girl was older and 'cool.'"
Taking Advantage of Them
"I've been posting on him recently, he was my former neighbor and friend. We didn't immediately hit it off but after a while, we became good friends."
"I tried helping him out (he's an unemployed single dad of two special needs kids). He eventually saw my kindness as something to take advantage of, so late last fall, he either broke into my house (or enabled someone else to do it for him) and stole money from me."
"When I confronted him about this, he physically attacked me."
"I can't say it doesn't hurt."
Friendships are incredibly important, but we're unfortunately not meant to be friends with everyone. Some people simply do not turn out to be the friends we thought they were.
We may know that this happens, but that doesn't make it hurt any less.
No one wants to be alone.
But that doesn't mean we should settle when it comes to choosing a romantic partner.
When people rush into things without letting love flourish, it could lead to problems down the line that can inevitably lead to difficult breakups.
Those who've learned this the hard way shared their experiences with love when Redditorlastknownstar asked:
"What common mistakes do people make when choosing a life partner?"
Communication is key.
Discussing Life Issues
"Not discussing big life issues: your preference for having kids, parenting styles, deep religious beliefs, career aspirations, significant traumas…anything that may affect how you make decisions together later on."
"My parents were like this. Dad grew up in a standard midcentury 'men run the house, women stay in the kitchen' family, but Mom came from a long line of domineering southern matriarchs who had their husbands whipped. Dad was naturally a good cook and Mom hated cooking, but once they got married, Dad insisted she make all the food because that's what wives are supposed to do. No warning, total 180 on their relationship up to that point."
"He's learned his lesson and now happily cooks for my stepmom, but man... That's not something you can just spring on your new spouse overnight!"
What About Kids
"Having kids is a really big question that absolutely needs to be communicated. I've also heard that it's a topic that would make the man a big red flag if asked early into the 'relationship' as in first date and/or texts are off limits."
"Wouldnt it be a lot nicer to 'speed date' these big topics early on?"
These Redditors realized ignorance of financial responsibility in a relationship came at a cost.
"Finance is the number 1 leading cause of divorce."
"Edit: this popped up in my YouTube recommendation (Is your relationship struggling because of finance? - Dave Ramsey https://youtu.be/XuU7oabGqjk). Google is not monitoring us or anything"
"This is such a big issue in relationships. Knowing each other's spending habits is equally important. My ex would be extremely judgmental when it came to my 'fun money', but when he bought a new TV or a new gaming console, he was not to be questioned on it."
You can't change people.
Fixing Their Flaws
"Thinking, 'I know this person has flaws, but when we're married I can help fix them.'"
"Ok marriage isn’t working but if we have kids things will change because it will bring us closer."
"I personally had this issue dating someone who was as sweet as could be, but not the brightest bulb in the socket, and they relied on me for knowledge on everything from health to history to housework. All perfectly googleable or troubleshootable questions, but always defaulted to giving up and asking
mommy the girlfriend for help. Admittedly it was kind of an ego boost to have someone always telling me how smart I was and deferring to my judgement on everything, but that's not what a healthy romantic relationship should be like."
"I thought I could nudge them gently into being slightly more self sufficient, but it only got worse as they grew accustomed to relying on me for every little thing. And of course the flip side was I felt like I could never rely on them when I needed help... I knew I was SOL if I couldn't do everything myself, because I was dragging around a parasite instead of a partner."
"Next time I want to spend years working on a fixer-upper, I'm just going to buy a crumbling Victorian house. It'll cause me less stress in the long run."
Taking An Emotional Toll
"I was in a similar boat with an ex, wasn't so much her fault as she had a learning disability and epilepsy."
"Every other weekend we also looked after her kids from past relationships, one of which had autism, and due to my ex's condition she wasn't allowed to be on her own with the kids meaning I had to be there as the capable, responsible adult."
"We were together for just shy of 4 years."
"After she broke things off it took a good few months for me to get used to the fact that I could actually let my guard down, switch my brain off and relax. Without needing to constantly worry that someone would need my help or that I needed to ensure her safety."
"She didn't quite realise the toll it was having on me or the amount of responsibility was on my shoulders. She would constantly suggest things like holidays abroad with just us two and the kids, and all I could think was that it would be far from a relaxing holiday for me as I'd have her and two kids to look after and be responsible for the entire time."
Managing expectations is key.
"Choosing someone they think they should be with instead of someone they're actually compatible with."
"I feel a lot of people have a picture in their head of who they think they'll end up with and chase that ideal, instead of acknowledging their own personality and aiming for someone compatible with that. Easier said than done, but yeah."
– Viminia7 ·
Importance Of Value
"I talk with my partner about this all the time. We think its important to have shared values not shared interests."
"Yes it’s important to share things you both like to do, but just because your partner likes One Punch Man, like you do, doesn’t mean they are on the same page as you with resolving conflicts."
Elvis Presley reminded us that only fools rush in, despite his intense romantic feelings towards his object of affection.
But the wise men he was referring to were on to something.
It's best to ease into things and let love grow, and not force relationships without really getting to know the person with whom you plan to devote yourself to.
If it's meant to be, it'll be worth taking things slow by getting to know a prospective significant other's dreams, what makes them, and their values to see if there is enough chemistry to develop meaningful relationships.
Among the many reasons people watch, and rewatch, sitcoms is to imagine your life was more like the one you were watching.
Being able to afford a two-bedroom apartment in Greenwich Village on a line cook's salary, somehow always having the comfortable sofa available at your favorite coffee shop whenever you pop in, or having your best friends always available at your beck and call whenever you need them.
For the romantics, however, it's wishing you could have a romance like you've seen on television.
True not all sitcom romances are exactly the sort that makes you go all aflutter (Were Ross and Rachel actually on a break? And don't even get me started about Ted and Robin.)
Other sitcom couples are so captivating, though, that we would have given anything to be at their wedding... or at the very least go to their home for dinner every Friday.
And this includes plutonic couples, as there is nothing more heartwarming than a lasting friendship.
"What is the best couple in sitcom history?"
Creating An Even More Welcoming Community
"Troy and Abed. A couple of friends."- aghzombies
"They did grace the cover of Best Friends Weekly."- DwightsEgo
"Peralta and Doug Judy."- DavosLostFingers
"Reunited and it feels so good 🎶."- Ghostenx
"PSYCH"!... No, Seriously...
"Shawn Spencer and Burton Guster."- dazedcap
"'I'm Black, he's Tan'."- CrueGuyRobShawn Spencer What GIFGiphy
"The correct answer is Gomez and Morticia Addams."- Reddit
"They loved each other dearly. "
"They were completely enamored with each other, spent time with their kids, their family."
"Accepted everyone as they were."
"It wasn't til I was an adult That I realized married couples weren't meant to hate each other."
"My mother had many partners in my childhood, she's toxic and things were always chaotic."
"And watching 90s sitcoms, I thought married people were meant to hate each other, and I always wondered what the point was."- MissMurder8666
Overshadowed By Their Middle Child...
"Hal and Lois."- MrRocketman999
"As a husband, I don't think I can live up to Hal."
"He sort of sets a really high standard lol."
"He loves her like they are still in the honeymoon phase."
"So infatuated with her lol."- treathugger
A Better Couple? Many Would Say, "Knope"...
"Ben and Leslie."
"I' love you and I like you.'"
"Simple line, yet so powerful."- RadkeyooAmy Poehler Ben GIF by Parks and RecreationGiphy
"Gruesome", But Adorable
"Frank and Charlie from Always Sunny in Philadelphia."
"The gruesome twosome."- Herr_Poopypants
The Parents Everyone Wished Were Theirs...
"Bob and Linda from 'Bobs burgers'."- shashybaws
"All of the Belchers have such great relationships with each other. "
"They're wholly accepting and supportive (even if they disagree)."
"They really love each other, and it shows."- SummerOfMayhem
UK Version Only, Of Course...
"Moss and Roy (The IT Crowd)."- pentapotamia
"'I'm your wife, Roy!'"- Summerof5ft6andahalf
"'If anything, I’m the husband!'"- pentapotamiait crowd chris odowd GIFGiphy
Afterlife Be Damned... Or not, Actually...
"Eleanor and Chidi from 'The Good Place.'"
"How can you beat two deeply flawed people who together make each other better over and over again?"- hotbimess
Ruining All Food For Viewers, One Food Group At A Time...
"The only correct answer is - Scully and Hitchcock."- Prestigious-Net-2236
"Back off! It's our microwave! Ours! GRRRRRRR!"- Lvcivs2311
Nostalgic And Wonderful
"Kitty and Red from That 70s/90s Show."- saginator5000
"I like how Red on the surface seems like a mean parent who doesn’t let his kids have fun."
"But he’s watching out for his kids."
"And he’s a good man."
"He has a hard and stressful time supporting his family and he is grumpy sometimes but he would do anything for his family and he really loves them."
"What he does for Hyde is amazing."
"He just doesn’t put up with BS."- themanfromvulcanMothers Day Woman GIF by LaffGiphy
It Seems Everyone Is Better With Turk At Their Side
"Turk and Carla."
"Or Turk and JD. (Scrubs)."- JCBAwesomist
"Turk and JD all the way."- nunyabidnez76
Can't We Get Back What We Once Had?...
"Homer and Marge had a lot of beautiful moments back in the older seasons."
"Sadly, seasonal rot has ruined a lot of that."
"I miss a lot of how the characters used to be."
"Like, Homer was an oaf and a brute, but he loved his family immensely and deeply and would (and DID) do any and everything for them."
"He'd catch details like in that episode about the streetcar play that you wouldn't think he would."
"He gave up beer for a month for Marge and we got to see that, for him, it wasn't just a minor thing."
'Lisa might have been intelligent but she not only had ample 'dumb/shallow' moments, she also was very close to Bart and, likewise, Bart was close to her."
"He might struggle in school but he also showed he wasn't dumb either."- Snowtwohomer simpson love GIFGiphy
Be they married in the first episode or on and off again for an insufferable amount of time (looking at you, Jeanine and Gregory in Abbott Elementry!), sitcom couples give us people to root for and fill our own hearts with hope.
So much so that we don't mind following the arc of their love stories over and over again.
And yes, the episode where David meets Patrick's parents remains a tearjerker, no matter how many times you watch it.