Eye to Eye

I was co-teaching an unruly 8th grade class with an older woman who wasn't really cut out for the demands of this particular position.

She spent a lot of time yelling and not a lot of time building relationships. Suffice to say we didn't see eye to eye.

That said, I never expected one of our students to bring an armful of water balloons to class and throw them at her mid-lecture.

Professional-Tower76

Jurassic Undies...

I had an 8 year old kid drop trou to show off his new dinosaur undies. Kid was just super excited about dinosaurs and wanted to show off. The week prior he'd brought in some dino books and everyone had been ooooohing and aaaahing so he just thought that showing off his undies would elicit the same reaction.

Considering some of the other stories here, not so bad.

notanevilmastermind

Duck and Look Away

Two things:

1. Had a student throw a book at me in the middle of class. They were mad about something that happened before they walked into my room. I went up to them and quietly told them that they can step out into the hallway for a few minutes to compose themselves and chill out for a bit. For some reason they thought I was getting them into trouble (quite the opposite, I was trying to defuse the situation so they wouldn't get themselves into trouble) and he picked up the text book as I was walking off and threw it at me. He missed.
2. Earlier this year I had a student attend my class virtually and she decided it would be a great idea to flash the camera. razorhog

"Jesus yes I did"

Not a teacher but saw someone in Biology class who licked a frog's brain covered in Formaldehyde. And when the teacher went up to the kid and asked him if he really did it, the kid says "Jesus yes I did," and goes up to the brain and licks it again. He was sent to the emergency room after that.

DingDongPuddlez

Psycho

It was our science class and everyone hated the teacher. Idk why since she was nice. Anyway, she got a fish tank put into her room towards the end of the year. On a day the teacher was absent, one of her classes (not mine) took the fish from the tank and stomped on them and killed them. The next morning I was walking past her room to my locker and she was crying outside of her room and another teacher was comforting her.

On the last day she was absent again and all of the classes made her room a mess. She didn't come back the next year.

JonathanFTM

Happy Days

I teach adults, so behavior problems or violence very rarely occur. One day many years ago, I was teaching maybe the 3rd or 4th day of a 3-week non-credit English as a Second Language class at the college where I worked when one of the students stood up suddenly and yelled that the class was wasting time with me and I was a terrible teacher and he wanted his money back. He stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind him. The rest of the class, about 20 others, had watched his rant in complete silence.

When he had gone, I shrugged and said to all of them, "Well, I can't make everybody happy. Some people don't like the way I do things."

Immediately, they all started talking at once, reassuring me that they were perfectly happy with class and something was wrong with him, etc.

When I went to see my boss after class, he laughed & told me that he gave the guy his refund without ever questioning my professionalism.

SnooPickles3213

Who Knows?

Not me, but one of my mentor teachers when I was doing first-year teaching. She was teaching fourth graders that year, which in the US are approximately 9-10 years old. As the kids are coming in and getting ready for the day, she turns around and one of her students is just peeing into his own backpack.

She's pretty stunned and asked him what on earth he was doing and why. His reply? A shrug and an "I dunno."

Casoscaria

Chocolate Devil

I once bought chocolate-filled doughnuts for my class as a treat. The naughtiest kid in the class decided to squeeze the chocolate out and rub it all over the brand new white shirt I was wearing to say thank you.

missyoga2

Ewwww.....

Came to class so high that he vomited all over another kid's backpack. The other kid went "Damn, ew!" and yanked his backpack up, effectively throwing vomit all over the room.

After everyone had washed up, I had to hold the rest of class outside since the smell was so bad. Luckily it was my last class of the day.

SalemScout

Poor Fish

Ugh, when I was in school we had this biology teacher who was really passionate about fish. Her classroom had a great big fish tank with this massive frowny-faced moron dwelling in it. He was pretty chill, presumably generations of pupils had tapped on the glass until he didn't care any more. Some absolute oxygen thief decided to pour in the entire box of food and other crap from around the biology lab into his tank and killed the poor fish.

AdmiralGinge

No Funny

I had an older student whom I didn't even teach walk in and start threatening some students. All parents had to be notified, the older student was suspended, and I had to file a police report.

Not fun for anyone.

The_PracticalOne

Hostage Crisis

Oh another kid about 13 held me effectively hostage with an industrial staple gun to my forehead.

thenotoriousaep

genius...

I'm the student here, well in 3rd grade I had the farts and I knew I wouldn't make it to the bathroom in time so I knew I was hopeless...

UNTIL, I thought of a genius plan! I would clamp my butt down to the seat sooo hard with my hands that it would muffle out the sound...

Genius

genius...

Next thing I heard was this HUGE sound you could only hear if you went on a trip to hell. It was almost as if you were in a stall next to Satan himself taking a poop. It echoed throughout the whole classroom. Everyone (including the teacher - she was only giggling) started laughing. I just thought it was an accomplishment at the time but now every time I think about it, I feel embarrassed.

BlankNameSlot

Slither

Someone released a snake. It was my first year as a teacher and honestly was way over my head. The kids found a snake at the bus stop that morning, one of my kiddos decided to grab it, keep it in his pocket for at least two hours then to release it in the middle of my lesson 2nd period.

mfp000

Yuck

I once had a kid poop on the floor, he was 7.

smooth_macaroon

Bottoms Up

Covid brought hand sanitizer into every classroom here. Kids would grab the bottle and squirt it into their hands. Some would take the bottle to the back of the room for friends and bring it back. One kid took the bottle and used it. Went to give it to a friend. I kept teaching. Next thing I know he has his hand up. "MISS, IS HAND SANITISER SAFE? CAN I DRINK IT?" Little idiot drank half the bottle with his friend.

Miss_Dingbat

Roasted

Pull the fire alarm after roasting another kid.

FlamingoFan101

Lmao, I'm imagining the kid that did the roasting making some kind of roasted/on fire pun and then being like, "somebody call the fire department" and pulling the alarm.

backupstrapon

Help Wanted

When I was a German teacher in France, in between classes, when all rooms were empty, I heard a child screaming in the class room next door. It sounded like he was being tortured, truly horrible. I rushed to see what was going on, there were only a teacher and a 12 year old kid in the room. He screamed that he wanted to kill himself and that he wanted to jump out of the window. He also threw really bad insults at the teacher, but I couldn't understand everything as my first language isn't french and his panicked voice was not a 100% understandable to me.

Turns out, the teacher just asked him to copy the notes off the board into his notebook and it caused a really bad reaction. Don't know why, I never asked the teacher about the child again, didn't want to be nosy. I just know that he had to be escorted by the police as he didn't let anyone touch him.

good_doggo_

Sparky...

I had a student in my 6th grade homeroom (which was a science classroom) just stand up, calmly walk across the room to the counter height lab surface and jamb a paperclip into the power socket.

He was a mostly fine, there was a pop and some smoke and he flew a couple of feet back, but that was it.

Spiritual_Jaguar4685

Sliced

Not a teacher, but I remember a girl getting mad at another girl over something trivial and cutting her finger off with a pair of scissors in 3rd grade. For some weird reason this girl didn't have normal school type scissors. Her mother had given her what looked like the type that comes with a kitchen knife set. We all freaked out when the finger hit the desk. Never did see that girl again, I assume she got expelled.

midwest0pe

Out the Window

Threw another student out the window. Things escalated so quickly I didn't even know there was a problem until it was done. Window was open (no broken glass) 1st floor, and I never heard about it ever again.

Jerseystateofmindeff

London

Kids I didn't teach running into my classroom and spraying fire extinguishers... Having glass test tubes thrown at me... Having basketballs thrown at me... Oh the list never ends. Suggestion: don't teach in London.

thenotoriousaep

Mr. X

Not a teacher, and I wouldn't say this is the worst, but more like the weirdest thing that happened in a class. For one school year I went to this behavioural treatment facility/school. I was one of the more well behaved people there because I wasn't acting out at all but I missed a lot of public school due to severe depression and PTSD. However, a lot of the people there were not well behaved and either had juvenile criminal records, violent tantrums/episodes, or were like me and we're quiet and reserved but couldn't really function in day to day life for various reasons. There was only one kid from the same town as me who went to school there, we'll call him X.

X wasn't aggressive but he was a stoner who would purposely push people's buttons by disobeying or doing the exact opposite of what they asked of him. He was also very stubborn and would sometimes just ignore any directions given to him. One day X showed up obviously high as a kite (turns out he ate three "brownies" that morning) claiming he thought he was gonna die, and in general being very disruptive to the class. The Counselor in charge of the room finally had enough and told him he had to leave the room and go to the nurses office until things settled down. X gets into a verbal sparring match with the Counselor about how he has a right to stay in the room and he doesn't want to leave.

Things escalate far enough to where he starts hurling insults at the Counselor. In a moment of frustration the Counselor snaps and yells at him to knock it off. (He almost never raises his voice) There is a moment of silence as the two of them stare each other down. Suddenly X drops on the floor and starts barking at the Counselor and running around the room on all fours. Finally the orderlies step in and escort him out, meanwhile the rest of the class is dumbfounded as to what just happened.

Throwaway_5828472_

Poor Sod

Math class, we had a new math teacher and the whole class bullied him away by using a gluestick on the blackboard, filling it up a good bit and making their own paper spitballs and shooting it at him. The whole class except me had to stay after school and got detention. The bullied teacher told the principal I was the only kid out of a class of 30 that genuinely wanted to attend the lesson. After only 2 days of actually trying to teach our class, I never saw the poor sod again.

pi-on

Snipped

Oh and another kid (6?) Cut a giant chunk of my hair off near my scalp.

thenotoriousaep

Pyro Kid

UK teacher checking in. I had a 15yo heat up coins in the bunsen burner then pass them to his unsuspecting mates. One kid got a circular burn on his palm, pyromaniac kid was sent out and then started swearing about me on the corridor (halls).

Pyro kid's mum came into school the next day trying to beat me up, she got through the main locked gate and then into the science building before someone finally asked her wtf she was doing.

luckily I was at home with a suspected miscarriage so she didn't get to smack me one.

The school were all surprised Pikachu when I handed in my notice!

dblockmental

Kick Rocks

Not me but one of my high school teachers. She was walking to her car after school and this guy hurls a rock from the second floor balcony at her. She was just laying there and we thought she was dead. Thankfully she just had a concussion and needed stitches. She quit teaching a few years later and ran for mayor. She won!

HermioneMarch

Speak up Matt....

I was in a class in 9th grade that was a dual period (2.5 hours) so we had a break in the middle. Our regular teacher was out on maternity leave and we were given a sub that had never taught the subject before. She was incredibly difficult to understand half the time and then would yell at us when we didn't give the right answers. Well, after reading animal farm one of the students in our class got the bright idea to rebel and show his distaste for her authority. So one day we get dismissed for our break and Matt comes and tells each of us we don't have to go back to class. He took the phone cord and unscrewed the door handle to the classroom locking the teacher inside.

This was before cell phones and there were no classrooms next to ours, so she effectively got locked inside for over 2 hours as we all never came back and then went to lunch after. The vice principal ended up finding her in absolute tears. The next day the principal came to class and made us each apologize to her individually. When we were done, she screamed at us and abruptly quit. I still feel horrible even though she really was not a nice person.

WhiskeyVagabond

Stay in Public School

Not my stories, but i have two from when i was a student at a catholic private school. when i was in second grade, some kid stabbed one of my friends (?) in his eye with a mechanical pencil, he still has a brown dot on his eye where they stabbed him, and in 3rd grade one of the older kids brought in a pigeon to class. our school had a pigeon overpopulation, so they were fairly common in my school, but this was the first time someone brought one into the classroom instead of the pigeon coming in by itself.

sylvie_loves_frogs

Poisoned

Not a teacher but... Kid in my class a while back was a huge idiot and whined about everything. In science, there was this powder used for an experiment we were told explicitly to use only for the experiment. Kid eats it and the teachers had to call Poison Control.

natopotatomusic

Just Plain Mean

Not my class but my next door neighbor's room. My coworker had surgery on her knee and was on crutches. Crutches suck and she was really struggling with them so other teachers and the kids would help her as she schlepped around the room or up the hallway.

We had a student who was mean. There is no other way to say it--just a mean kid. He would watch students and teachers and figure out their weak spot and then poke it.

I never dealt with him myself but I heard him saying just horrible, hateful things to people. His favorite thing to do was to walk out of class and then wander the halls for hours; even our assistant principal washed his hands of this kid.

I happened to be in the hall after the bell rang, getting kids to rooms, etc. My coworker came hobbling up the hallway from the bathroom, towards her room. Mean Kid sees her and I saw his face light up. I swear it was just an instant in time as he beat her to her door and dumped out his entire water bottle.

Then he laughed and said something like "Try to get in there now" and ran off in the other direction.

My coworker had to freeze in place, lest she slip on the water. I ran to get paper towel from my room, another teacher called security, and my coworker had to stand there, visibly shaken.

I've seen worse but that was just such a quick-thinking and horrible thing to do.

TeacherPatti

Law & Order : 3rd Grade

I was student teaching a third-grade class (eight-year-olds) in an inner-city. The students were not permitted to go outside for recess or PE class, because an occasional stray bullet would find its way to the playground, just to set the scene properly for you.

We were doing an arts and crafts thing, where you cut out pictures from magazines to make a collage.

One little girl apparently pissed off one of the boys, because he lunged at her with a scissors, regular scissors, not little kid safety scissors, like he wanted to stab her. I was fortunately close enough to them and dumb enough to just react- I jumped between them and managed to get the scissors from him while he kept trying to get past me, yelling, "Let me cut her" the entire time.

Security came and took him away and I never saw him again.

KLWK

Flay Him

Wasn't a teacher yet, but knew a guy in HS who flayed a dead cat's face in science class (we were dissecting them) and made it into a hand puppet. Think he got detention, but pretty sure that was it. His family owned a big insurance company and were flush with cash, so if he got in trouble, it was light by comparison.

tamelycliches

Why that car?

So story from my dad who was in high school around the 60-70s. His teacher had a cabrio car, the students took a poop in the car. End of story.

churchisforbrunettes

Lead from behind

A kid stabbed another kid in the back with a pencil and then threw it at me and ran. The kid who was stabbed turned around, saw the pencil and punched me in the face. Neither the teacher nor the kid that was stabbed believed me that it was the other kid, despite the fact that I had never been in trouble prior to that and the other kid was suspended at least once a month.

heybrother45

Audio Files

Not a teacher but when I was in high school I had a friend bring in a portable speaker and hid it in my math teacher's class room. Once class started he began to play the most vile porn audio, after a couple seconds the teacher heard it and began to search he classroom for where the sound was coming from, he would pause the video on his phone for the noises to stop and she would give up and go back to teaching, this happened continuously for the whole 80min class until the last 10mins she caught my friend. He was subsequently sent to the head masters office where he had an in school suspension for 2 weeks.

TimelessBean

Fueled

I wasn't the primary teacher but an English language assistant and had a 12-13 year old whip out a lighter suddenly and nearly light his classmate's hair on fire in music class once. Luckily we caught him before the flame touched hair.

Different student threw a fit in class and like violently flung her individual desk/seat across the room.

sammoplant

I Hate Her

In gr. 8 I hung out with this group of girls who were lead by this one girl who went on to become pretty popular in high school. We used to hang out in the girls change room during recess to avoid the snow. The change room was beside the gym and kids had to leave their outdoor shoes outside the gym entrance. She'd leave the change room every day and grab some random kids' shoes and dunk them in toilet water before returning them to where she found them.

fork4k

Dirty Air

I'm not a teacher, but a classmate of a kid. They find it funny to let ham and cheese sandwiches rot in the ceiling panels of our home room, and spray deodorant into the school ventilation system, and of course he vapes. :(

LeoAndWolfie

Stop Fighting!

I taught high school special Ed, emotionally disturbed, for quite a few years and actually the kids were better behaved than a lot of "regular" kids usually. Worst was one boy called a girl who was over 300lbs fat and I stepped between the ensuing fight because I didn't want to clean up the blood (the boy deserved the ass beating he was about to get though). I had to keep the girl off him and got slammed into a filing cabinet in the midst of it. Girl came back after a hospital stay so embarrassed about what she had done and apologized repeatedly.

I was fine other than a sore back for a day or two.

Beyond that event - had some chairs kicked and pens or scissors thrown. Had a senior who was going to fight a little freshman and when the senior stood up and took off his shirt the entire class stood up so he knew if he touched the freshman, he was going to have to take on 12 other people too.

LolaZe

Boy Bye

I am not a teacher but this was pretty bad. In my third grade, there was a kid who acted really bad. He did some bad stuff like turning the lights off in the middle of the class, leaving everyone thinking that it was a power outage.

He also introduced himself to a guest speaker with a wrong (but funny) name in front of the whole school. The speaker mispronounced the fake name and the entire school laughed at him (the kid was well known and had siblings in multiple grades).

The teacher made him apologize in front of the school to make up for his bad behavior. But, the worst time was when we were in lunchtime with parent volunteers patrolling the playground. He ate bird poop off a bleacher, freaking the volunteers out and getting him sent to the principal. I don't know what happened after (if he got detention or suspension or anything like that).

WannabeMemeLord42069

Purge

College professor here. Overheard her talking about wanting to shoot up a rich neighborhood if a Purge situation ever happened. Big no-no to insinuate possible shootings of any kind, so I reported her. Word got back to her about who turned her in, and she threatened me in front of class. After a couple of meetings and 2 weeks out of my class, she reappeared as if nothing had happened. Scary crap, man.

tamelycliches

Poor Kitties...

I'm not a teacher but when I was in 3rd grade this kid brought kittens, yes like actual baby cats to school... in his backpack. At recess he was letting a bunch of kids pet them (I didn't). The teacher found out and looked in the backpack and... as it turned out unfortunately because these kittens were so young, and away from their mother, and in a zipped up backpack, they were actually dead. A bunch of kids in my class were petting dead kittens in a backpack.

starclimber76

Choir Mischief 

I was invited to take a high school choir to a state music education festival, a great honor for me. Concert went off without a hitch. In theory, moments like these are highlights to many conductors... cherish every moment.Turned my phone back on afterwards to learn that another student of mine, one in a younger choir that was not part of this conference performance, had slammed another students head into our classroom piano (much to the horror of that substitute teacher). Brought me right back to reality. Blood was dry on the keys when the bus dropped us off at school that evening.

2u3e9v

Hope he's well...

I'm not a teacher, but a few years back another class from my grade bullied a teacher so much that it was rumoured he attempted suicide. He never came back after that.

He was a bit different, but nothing bad where he would deserve any of the treatment he received. The class would purposely be super disruptive - yelling, talking over him, not completing any work and overall disrespecting and insulting him.

This went on for the whole school year. It was confirmed that he did have some mental health issues going on, but nothing else was ever said.

They thought it was funny but now realise that it's very sad. No one really knows what happened to him.

Biglittlebug1

The Injured Saint

Back in high school we had this absolute saint of a teacher; she was super sweet all the time. We were in a combined class with some jerks though, and near the end of the year the final drop in the bucket came: one of them hit her in the face while she was talking to him and ran off; as she was walking behind him to get him his friend slammed a door into her and knocked her on the floor.

She wasn't injured or so, but that was the only time we have ever seen her mad. And boy was she mad haha.

PivotPsycho

Former Idiot

Emptied a bin over another student's head. Luckily it was a few years ago now, and they both laugh about it.

essiie__