Religion can be a beautiful thing...
But even the most devoted can notice flaws. While learning the stories behind your faith, or reading religious texts, there may be some passages that make you do a double take. Maybe it's outdated or completely lacking logic, but sometimes there can be humor found in it.
Redditor u/sebastian-yrigoyen asked people to share the plot holes they've noticed while practicing their religion, and some people made very good points.
Could someone explain the rules for heaven?
Late to the party, but in Islam there's the belief that God knows everything you will do before you're even born. Meaning that we don't control our own actions. At the same time, to get into Heaven, you need to-- of your own accord-- pray 5 times daily, read the Quran, etc. So my thing is this: If God knows what everyone is gonna do beforehand, and He knows people aren't gonna do what it takes to get into Heaven (cause he is omniscient); doesn't this then mean that God has already decided who goes to Heaven and who gets Hell? Cause there's no possible way in any Abrahamic religion (cause they all operate under the "do this to get into paradise" thing and all have God knowing everything before it happens) that we'd be able to try to get into Heaven. And this is just the tip of the iceberg on questions
We are created as we should be
I would say about 3/4 of hardcore Christians think being LGBT is wrong and against their god, but then also say that "God created everyone exactly how he wants them to be" like ?????
Many people die in that book
I want to know why so many Christians say that murder is wrong but ignore all the killing that God did in the Bible. Like, how do they justify drowning everyone except Noah and his family?
When was sin created?
I am a Christian and a thing that has really puzzled me is that if Adam and Eve ever gave birth to a child wouldn't it be a sin even if marriage wasn't a thing back then? Like despite marriage not being a thing back then it would still technically be a sin in the future. Or did God make marriage a thing in the future and just brush it off since Marriage wasn't a thing back then? I am confusion.
The mysterious story of Easter
Why did they roll a big rock over the the entrance of the cave where Jesus's body was taken to after he died? It seems like something that was insanely impractical for people to do at the time. Was it common practice to throw bodies in a cave and then seal it? If so, was Jesus the last body to be put in? To a non-believer, it just seems like something the story added to make the story more convincing, but it doesn't really make sense outside of the set up for a resurrection story.
On the same subject, I've heard a preacher talk about how Jesus basically teleported out of the cave after the resurrection, but god apparently sent an angel to sit on the boulder which was moved out of the way (for no reason). That implies that not only was there a resurrection, but god thought it wasn't miraculous enough and had to add a dash of showmanship to the whole coming back from the dead thing. What's up with that?
To see is to believe
Why has there been no "holy magical" moments in our time like there's nothing to actually show gods presence. And that's why I'm secretly unreligous(my parents are religious)
The ridiculous life spans of Biblical figures
Christians claim that the people in the Bible lived to be absurdly old. For example, they say that Noah was around 650 years old when he built the ark and didn't die until he was older then 900. How could this even be remotely possible? It doesn't make sense because they would have lived much shorter lives then we do in the present. They wouldn't have had access to modern medicine or anything.
Plot points were suddenly abandoned
So we all know that Jesus is the main focus of the new testament, but my biggest question is, what happened to him between the ages of 12 and 30
In the entirety of the bible itself,a number of immaculate creatures were named (such as the Behemoth, Leviathan,etc.) but not heard of after being mentioned and no one has ever interacted with them ever since
(Although I've read other christian texts, this is going to be one for people have not) where did giants come from, and even more astonishingly, where did they go
No one ever told you about the aquarium on the ark?
What happened to all the fresh water fish in the flood
Noah had a 50 gallon aquarium on the ark
Careful who you say that to
I was raised a Scientologist. There are many plot holes.
This is the trouble when your messenger is a 2 bit sci-fi author with fraudulent tendencies.
The dating pool was pretty nonexistent
"In the beginning there was Adam and Eve" Ok, I'm following that. 2 people on the planet.
They had 2 sons named Cain and Able. Yep, still with it. 4 people on the planet.
Cain killed Able. Ok, thats down to 3 people on the planet.
Cain took a wife. Wait, wut?
Mythology is all over the place
This isn't my religion, but I always found it hypocritical that the gods punished Oedipus for sleeping with his mother without realizing it, despite the fact that Zeus married his own sister while being fully aware that they were siblings.
Loki's backstory is actually tricky
why doesn't Sleipnir have the same sentience as his half siblings when they're all children of Loki? where does all the extra mead from Heiðrún go? and that's only the beginning.
This person just admitted they're a viking and no one noticed.
I imagine they were hard to miss
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The lack of dinosaurs.
Fun fact the bible has a few verses in it describing monstrosities that could be dinosaurs. Even dragons.
Why does he make us suffer the foxes?
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If God is the all knowing intelligent being that created everything, what was his reasoning around making foxes mating noises, if Humans are his children and he loves us why make us suffer every night listening to screaming of little horny foxes.
Is there a grey area?
If good people go to heaven and bad people goes to hell, and also we'll see again loved one after death, what happen when a good people love a bad people? (Think a mother with a serial killer son for instance)
Is the good people condemned to spend eternity without their loved one? How is it fair?
Surprised I scrolled down this far to find this, but this was a problem that I raised a lot in my religious classes a child. Never got an answer, usually I was met with a strict scolding.
About the closest I ever got to an answer was that in heaven everyone will be so perfectly happy it will be as if our connections from earth won't matter. Obviously they didn't know and were speculating but that actually made me feel even worse.
Who does Satan think he is?
Why would satan punish humans for rebelling against god, something that he himself once did. I've always thought of it as hypocritical, and that satan would reward the human for exercising their free will and living a life free of religious constraints.
It's a special privilege
God is perfect and cannot sin. There exists "the wrath of God." Wrath is one of the seven deadly sins.
Yes but He has a special permit
JUST the 2 of "US?"
If Adam and Eve were the first two people on Earth and are responsible for the birth of all people ever, than the entire human race is the product of incest.
Although, to be fair, that does explain quite a lot.
Bingo!
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My wife and I got married in the church that her and her family went to growing up. Part of the process of being married in the church meant that we had to do pre marriage classes. During these classes we had to discuss a variety of topics including sexual relationships between husband and wife.
We were told that the catholic church does not believe in any form of birth control, a child is a gift from god. Couples looking to engage in intercourse just need to keep track of a woman's cycle and that would be fine. Kind of seemed like someone trying to rig a lottery.
The Lost Years
What happened to Jesus in his teen years though?
There's actually a really good and funny book called "Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pall" that takes place during his teen years where Jesus (Joshua in the book) and Biff go out and try to figure out how he's supposed to be a prophet. And I take that book as full cannon.
because HE said so....
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If man is not perfect, but man wrote the Bible how am I supposed to trust what I'm reading from the Bible. How do I know they didn't mess anything up?
Because it Christian faith the Bible was written by God through people, so they only wrote down what He told them to.
Meant to be the Villain
I don't know if this is considered as a plot hole:
Judas Iscariot was essential to Jesus' plan. If he didn't sold Jesus out then the prophecy will not come true. Why then is he considered a villain? He should be at the top! He got the job done!
The belief was that although Judas couldn't disregard his role in betraying Jesus, the fact was that he chose to kill himself (hanging himself from a tree) as opposed to genuinely repent. We see that Peter also betrayed Jesus but ultimately seeks forgiveness etc.
Forgive them yourself?
If you're God and you need to split off part of you to send to earth to die for the sins of mankind, wouldn't it just be faster to like... forgive them yourself? I mean you aren't scoring points from me for this convoluted story of some Virgin getting knocked up by you to give birth to a form of you that I'm supposed to feel bad about when they die for my sins even though that was their whole purpose.
Keeping Records....
We can read Egyptian hieroglyphics. They kept extensive records. No mention of using Jewish slaves to build the pyramids, them revolting, a royal named Moses or a Red Sea parting.
Although interestingly Moses is actually a fairly common Egyptian name but the guys who wrote the Bible didn't seem to know that. They made a different story about the name's origin (She named him Moses (Moshe), saying, 'I drew him out (meshitihu) of the water'.)
It's very weak, of course, but it's a hint that there might be some truth to the Moses was in Egypt story.
Gotta start somewhere....
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An omnipotent being is used to explain the origin of everything in this universe, but there's no explanation for the origin of said omnipotent being.
Where is the lineage?
Adam and Eve had 3 sons...
The bible (and most ancient scripture) is notorious for not listing daughters of people unless they have a key role to play in the religion and/or government. Normally only list the males because of the "lineage."
Mary's Tale
Virgin Mary had a child. Glances suspiciously at churches/catholic schools stating abstinence is 100% effective in avoiding a pregnancy.
Political Optics
Not really a plot hole in the Christianity , but a plot hole in the interpretation of it.
Christianity was originally highly Jewish based and they didn't like Romans, a few centuries later it was Roman/ European based and they heavily discriminated Jewish people. What?
This one is easily explained and historically substantiated. Rome was working furiously to kill all the Christians. However, it just wasn't working. It seemed the more that they killed, the more their numbers would grow. Constantine saw a political opportunity and followed the advice of the old adage "if you can't beat 'em, join 'em" and officially changed the religion of Rome to Christianity. Most consider it a politically motivated decision. The Catholics say he converted himself and the entire country and they recognize him as an important figure in the history of their religion.
Lilith?
Lilith, who was Eve before Eve. She was created first to be equal to Adam, but didn't take kindly to constantly being told what to do, so she was kicked out of paradise (or left of her own will maybe). She supposedly had sex with angels or something, creating other tribes. Then God was like, "Well, screwed that one up. Next one will be a total sub." And so he made Eve out of a piece of Adam to make sure we always remember that women are owned by men.
To the Point!
I could live my entire life, adhering completely to the Christian moral compass, save millions of lives, treat every person with the utmost respect and dignity, refuse all toxic thoughts and actions, and yet (according to most Christian dogma) I would still burn in hell for eternity if I didn't believe the Christian God exists.
That sentiment alone tells me that morality, and the course of our lives in general, is irrelevant in the end. All that matters is that the Christian God gets recognition. That God, to me, sounds more narcissistic than benevolent and loving. And therefore, is not a God I wish to worship.
There's also issues such as, if God is truly omnipotent and omniscient then he could have purged the world of all suffering and pain. But he hasn't because... he loves us? Because somehow the gift of free will, and therefore the gift of imperfection is more important than letting your children suffer and experience pain? Some children are born into poverty, beaten, starved, and killed before 10 years of age, without ever seeing kindness. What's the lesson there God? Why must you treat the creations you love with such disdain solely to "make a point."
I could go on. There's so many issues I have with that belief system and narrative.
It's about Me!
God teaches us that it is a sin to be envious, and to be prideful, and that we must have compassion and understanding for others. And yet he will literally condemn someone to an eternity in hell for not worshiping him, even if said person has literally never heard of him.
Morals be damned
No longer religious, but one of the biggest contradictions in Christianity is that human beings by nature are morally imperfect beings. Yet a necessary component for the forgiveness of sins includes having the right sort of beliefs toward Jesus. How does it make sense that a person's eternal destiny relies solely on an imperfect being having a specific belief. I think we can all agree that human beings are morally imperfect, but I'd argue that they're far more imperfect when it comes to having true beliefs (assuming Christianity was true). It seems entirely unfair that that is the thing that people are judged on. People would have to be epistemically perfect to be judged on their beliefs.
Woof
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The concept of eternal peace and joy in heaven sounds very psychologically degrading long term. It sounds like living like a pet dog.
Huh?
It's said that god's first plan was to just create Adam. Then Adam started complaining about him wanting to be alone and out of parts God took from Adam he made Eve.
But here's my question, how would Adam have reproduced if he wouldn't have felt the need for a female companion? Gay sex? With himself? Did he have reproductive organs that could just spit out Adam 2.0?
525,600 Minutes....
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That the earth way created in 3 day. How tf were there days before the earth existed? Was God measuring 'days' based off another planet he created?
Well first he separates light from darkness and that's the first day, right? Assuming whoever wrote that down wasn't aware of other planets or that the earth revolved around the sun or even turned, just that light is intermittent and one cycle of light + dark is a day. Not great, but it does make sense.
Fake Prophets
I know someone who's Baha'i. They believe that every prophet talked about the same God, but according to what He wanted/thought was best at that certain time, and they believe that god is only good. No need to get deep with that second thing, and for the first one, smthg that kinda pisses me off, seeing how incoherent it is, they recognize every prophet, until Baha'u'llah (19th century).
The ones who came after, welp, don't care. But according to their faith, they should follow the most recent religion. Tho, they also say there are some fake prophets who act for their own pleasure etc etc. So here's the thing, and i guess i should ask, to see if they all believe that.
To Hell!
Not my religion, but why a Christian will condemn someone to Hell for being gay (condemning someone to Hell also being forbidden), because Leviticus, while eating shrimp and covered in tattoos, also Leviticus. Then telling the gay person it's ok for the Christian because Christ loves them, and he's cool with it. Isn't sin, sin? Is there only a 30 day sentence for eating shrimp, but death penalty for loving someone of your same sex?
So spiteful....
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The fact that God literally killed humanity because they were all sinners, but then he says love your fellow human.
billions & billions....
I used to be Catholic; I'm now an atheist.
But, if Jesus came to save everyone from sin 2,000 years ago, what about all the other human beings who lived and died 150,000 years before he showed up? Why weren't they saved? Christians will tell you that God saved them anyway, but why do we then have to deal with the can of worms Jesus opened and we have to follow the Ten Commandments and go to Church and tithe and everything else when they didn't have to?
There are about 100 billion galaxies each with about 100 billion stars; the odds are very favorable that intelligent life exists elsewhere containing civilizations who will rise up and go extinct before we ever even get CLOSE to finding them. Are they saved? Why didn't Jesus go to them?
The Bible is an arbitrary collection. Works were edited, things were lost in translation, books of the Bible were accumulated over time and voted on by councils; some made it in, some didn't. Given that it's basically held together by centuries of drafts and edits and additions and subtractions, how can we trust it? Yet, it's supposed to be THE word of God.
...I could go on.
There's nothing like being raised Catholic to make you a nonbeliever lol.
To Valhalla!
The best warriors are chosen upon death and half of them is sent to Valhalla.
The problem is that it's the worse half of the chosen. So you have to get enough battle prowess but not too much if you want to get to Valhalla... or you can use the Persuasion skill, of course.
Outside the Lines
Not really a "plot" hole, but an ethical one. In the guideline book for my religion, it makes several references that the means is justified by the end.
"Lets flood the entire planet and kill off trillions of life forms to get rid of evil."
"Reduce a city to ash for sinning, and anybody who looks at it turns to ash too."
"Im gonna make this one guy in particular lose literally everything he has; job, family, estate, etc., to prove that he will still worship me" -God
Even outside of the book of guidelines, people say it all the time.
"God is only putting us through this hardship so that we come out better."
I heard someone say that God made Coronavirus so that we could develop faster as a planet.
Someone said that school shootings were good, so that kids could get more protection in school.
But really? You're telling me that the hundreds of thousands of lives that have been lost are all worth it? Yeah, we've come a long way. But I would rather have these kids alive, right now.
Timeline Issues
I am Jewish. I am also a massive ancient history nerd.
In one of the first parts of the Torah, Abraham "returns to the land of the Philistines."
Problem: There were no Philistines at the putative time of Abraham. Even from the perspective of Biblical narrative.
The Philistines arrive at the end of the 1200s BCE and were only barely established in the current Gaza area by the time the Israelites start establishing themselves in portions of modern0day Israel/Palestine.
The chronology is just plain wrong.
No Matter What
It's not my religion but....
"I love everyone no matter what" followed by "You better love me back or I'm gonna hate you forever and torture you for eternity" followed by "I don't love those people neither should you, what you should do is make their lives a living hell."
And on the 5th?
I don't believe in any kind of God but I've always found it funny how in the bible, God made the sun on the fourth day. How could there have been any days before that?
Yeah so I believe in the original translation it says God created the world in 4 time periods, not really days. So it could have taken thousands of years, and Moses just used "time periods" because he wasn't there and didn't know how long God spent on each creation.
Loosed Inspired By
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Literally every biblical story. The more I read it, the less sense it makes.
Also the fact that we have to listen to some men who were "supposedly inspired by God" to write misogynistic crap and give stronger grounds to their own selfish need for power.
Bad with Names
If Jesus' mother was told by an angel that she was going to bear the messiah in the book of Luke, why did she and the rest of the family go chasing after Jesus telling everyone he was out of his head in the opening pages of Mark?
Three separate storytellers and written down 70-110 years after the death of the Messiah by others, not the actual apostles.
Lack of....
Evidence.
This is my problem with some religions: Why would you condemn us to hell if there's no/circumstantial evidence for your specific religion? If God just wanted us to have faith, why would he think we wouldn't worship other deities with the same amount of proof? Agnostic btw.
Without Logic
It's harder to believe than fiction.
But fiction (usually) tries to follow a path of logic and is at least somewhat reasonable in events and characters. Also the plotholes are usually few are defendable as "the character didn't think of that". The same cannot be said for any religion I have looked into.
Satan the Great
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If Satan punishes those who sin, wouldn't he be considered a good guy?
Alternatively, if Satan is a bad guy, why would he punish other sinners?
Perfect Word of God
Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John all have different conflicting accounts of what happened regarding the empty tomb. Did just Mary go alone or did the other Mary go too? Was there an earthquake or did the stone instantly move away or was the stone already rolled away? Did one or two or no angels show and talk to them? Did they go and tell everyone or were they too afraid to? Did they find Jesus was gone and then called the disciples to come see or did the angels tell them to go tell all the disciples? Did Jesus appear in the tomb and talk to Mary?
This is one of the plot holes that led me from being a firm believer fundamentalist to an agnostic wishy washy whatevs guy :D
Now my Christian belief system has to come to terms with the Perfect Word of God and the imperfect accounts in the Old and New Testaments.
The Third
Idk about plot holes in my religion, but I like one thing the most in my religion, it mentions a third form of life (apart from a man and woman) and I realized ancient India was very gender fluid, in fact even today whenever a baby is about to be born or is just born, Transgender people go to the new baby's house to give the baby blessing, it is considered auspicious. But ever since Britishers left India, LGBTQ+ community has been looked down upon. I hope they get the same recognition like the ancient times.
I am not that religious, I just was more curious about hinduism in quarantine coz boredom was eating me up so I thought let's try the spiritual way what my parents do lmao.
Do you read?
Raised Catholic, now Protestant. As a Catholic, I looked at the Protestants and thought "WTF, 1500 years after Jesus and suddenly you create your own church?" Now I'm like "Have you Catholics even read the Bible?" Main conclusion I've come to is that people are limited in what they can fully understand, so we all try to hold onto that small part we can grasp. So I'm chill with anyone who affirms Matthew 22, Chapters 36-40.
Silly Humans
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Humans just invented religion to have a little more sense in life and how everything is the way it is. For humans everything must have a meaning, since all the things we invented make a sense and have a function, even we people ourselves need to have a function, but that's maybe not how the world is built, we are not here for any reason, it's only a happenstance that we exist, that life on our world exists. That's why I believe more in aliens than I believe in any kind of god. Sorry for the bad english by the way.
I'm right here Y'all!
That Judas betrayal of Jesus doesn't make sense.
Jesus wasn't hiding. He rode into Jerusalem in broad daylight. Everyone knew he was coming. Judas' help wasn't needed to catch him.
Blasphemy!
I'm a lapsed catholic. Idolatry is one of the biggest "plot holes." If you worship the virgin Mary or any other saint you are as a matter of fact doing blasphemy. Don't come with the argument of them being a "middle man." Speak to god directly. The worship of saints is pretty much polytheism with yahweh (christian god) being Zeus's equivalent.
So Many ???
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Former catholic.. still waiting for somebody to explain Jesus's DNA situation is.. is he haploid? Where does his Y chromosome come from? So many questions.
Watch & Learn
Bring on the downvotes bc I know I'm going to get them.
No bible is the word of God written by man. They are the words of MEN written by MEN.
FFS there are over 1,000 denominations of Christianity alone, each knowing their version is the right one and all others are blasphemy.
Not to mention every bible from each religion is packed with contradictions...
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When we're intoxicated, or even the slightest bit tipsy from having a little too much to drink, our immediate perspective on things is hazy.
But there's nothing like a bit of alarming news or a jarring incident to snap us out of the fog and focus on the moment.
Sometimes alcohol isn't always to blame for our impairment.
It can be a state of mind, like a perpetual numbness from being complacent in life, and all it takes is one shocking moment to rattle us back to our senses.
Curious to hear from strangers online about this type of scenario, Redditor Known_Challenge_7150 asked:
"What’s one thing that sobered you up real quick?"
These individuals were witness to shocking events that sobered them up right quick.
Bleeding Out
"Got out of a taxi and found a naked man profusely bleeding from his head crawling up the driveway in my condo. Called him an ambulance completely forgot I was absolutely wasted until 45 minutes later when I'd helped him translate and in to an amublance and stepped in my front door."
"Later a few days later learned he'd slipped in the tub and literally crawled out for help. Poor dude. He was fine but I genuinely thought he was going to die there."
– DongLaiCha
Tragic News
"At a bachelor party and we got a phone call that the groom’s father had suddenly passed."
– accountnameredacted
Bottom Of The Barrel
"I went to visit my parents back in July. I was homeless and deep into fentanyl addiction so I lost a lot of weight. My folks could see it. They knew something was up. Anyway, I spent the night and I was getting ready to leave in the morning and I looked at myself in the mirror for a good long time. I finally had enough and told them everything. They took me to detox, from there I went to rehab. Graduated in August and been living with them ever since then. I have 160 days clean and sober."
– Crotch-Monster
A reality check can be enough for some people to snap out of it.
Like Father, Like Son
"Was driving a drunk friend home, he had been on a bender again and was smart enough to call me for a lift rather than try and drive. As I helped in to his house his mother came down the stairs and said 'your as drunk as your father' and went back upstairs. I haven't seen him drunk since then, he still drinks but the thought of turning into his dad scared him out of hard drinking."
– psycospaz
Busted
"Flashing blue lights."
– FiddleOfGold
"This sobered me up just thinking about it."
– redmaple_syrup
Losing Sight
"Woke up to no sight in one eye. I had cataract surgery so just thought one of the lenses had slipped and it was an easy fix. Eye doc says nope, you had a stroke. I loved soy sauce, teriyaki sauce and salty food, which caused high blood pressure, which caused retina damage. Over six months was able to get most of my eyesight back with medication, and all back within a year. Trying to navigate life with one eye was very sobering. Started taking HBP much more seriously."
– MissHibernia
Quitting The Bottle
"Looked up someone I went to highschool with who was an awesome guy. Found out he had been dead for 3 years from alcoholism, at age 33. I made an overnight change. I hadn't started drinking that night yet, 10 months ago. Haven't touched it again since."
– omgtater
These disturbing moments were enough for Redditors to immediately come to their senses.
Unplanned House Guests
"Me and a buddy Woke up in someone’s living room, realized neither one of us knew the people, they were just nice and let 2 drunk guys sleep on their living room floor. We didn’t even say goodbye."
– Oneinsevenbillion75
Serious Health Warning
"Elevated liver enzymes."
"And the knowledge that this sh** was gonna kill me and I just couldn't orphan my family over it."
"So I opted for recovery, instead."
"Clean and sober since June 5, 2009."
– Far_Meal8674
The Joyride
"Grew up in a rural area. The little town hosted dances at the hockey arena, everyone (adults and kids) went and they overserved everyone, regardless of age. I was maybe 16 or 17 and was absolutely sh*tfaced, and jumped in the back of someone's truck with about 8 other people to go back to someone's cottage for after dance drinking. The driver (still don't know who it was) started racing one of his buddies and we whipped around small dirt roads, flying around blind corners on the wrong side of the road, going god knows how fast. It was basically a disaster waiting to happen. It was crazy scary and I was sober and thankful to be alive when we finally arrived."
– foxfood9116
The human psyche is a fascinating thing, isn't it?
How we can automatically focus on something urgent at a crucial time, even after getting buzzed from drinking too much alcohol.
But as we're in the thick of the holidays, it's a good reminder to drink responsibly and stay off the roads if you drive to your celebratory destination.
Cheers. Stay safe. And happy holidays.
We've all complained or vented about something in our lives which, in the grand scheme of things, wasn't exactly a problem, or is very easily solved.
Then there are those who complain about things that others almost hope will happen to them at some point in their lives.
These are known as "first world problems", as they are problems that pretty much only the world's one percent faces.
From having to fly business class instead of first class, or being served Roederer instead of Dom Pérignon, these complaints are often met with amusement, bewilderment, or even anger.
Redditor jennimackenzie was curious to hear the most absurd "first world problems" anyone ever complained about, leading them to ask:
"What’s the most ridiculous 'first world problem' you’ve seen people get worked up over?"
"Tale As Old As Time..."
"I once knew a mom who was legitimately devastated, to the point of tears/grief, because a doctor predicted her 8 year old daughter's final height to be around 5'2","
"Which wasn't tall enough to get cast as Belle at Disney World."
"That was the child's (and her mother's) only dream in life, apparently."
"Didn't appreciate my suggestion that she could be Minnie or Mickey."
"Lol!"
"Only a face character would do!"- TravelLovingMom
"Must Be Funny, In A Rich Man's World..."
"My boss from about a decade ago was this insanely rich dude who always went to the bank to get fresh and crisp currency."
"He'd call the bank in advance to make sure they had some on hand."
"I think he was a germaphobe."
"He had a trash can that he'd throw $1 and $5 bills in that he thought was 'dirty' and regularly just donated it vs spending it."
"I asked him why he did this and he said it was too much trouble and asked if I wanted it."
"I said f*ck yeah dumped it into my bag and when I got home it was close to $400 in singles and fives.
"Another time, he wanted to upgrade all the computers in his studio, so we went to a store and bought 10 PCs."
"They all had $150 mail in rebates and he wasn't bothered to go through the trouble of mailing them in."
"3 weeks later I received $1500 after spending a whole afternoon filling out all those goddamn forms."- azninvasion2000
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Who Wore It Better?
"When I was about 19 years old, I was at my boyfriends family BBQ."
"I was wearing this pretty floral sundress."
"His cousins girlfriend showed up in the same dress and she was SO mad that she went and changed."
"I will never understand being upset when someone is wearing the same thing as you.'
"Did you really think that your shirt you bought off the rack is going to be unique to you?"
"No."- mertsey627
Seeing Red! Or Blue In This Case...
"The blue of the balloons wasn't quite the same as the bridesmaid's sashes."
"Years ago my wife and I attended a wedding."
"It was very low key."
"The dinner was in the dining hall at the university where the couple met, cinder block walls and all."
"It was a Baptist wedding - no booze and very serious."
"The dark blue balloons attempting to liven up the hall were a slightly darker shade of blue than the sashes on the bridesmaid's dresses."
"The bride lost here sh*t and absolutely raved for nearly an hour."
"I can't remember how they finally managed to talk her down."- mechant_papa
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See You In Court!
"Rich neighbors who end up in expensive court battles because they disagree about where a tree can be planted or whether the color of a fence fits in with the street’s 'amenity'."
'These disputes get really heated and rack up huge lawyers’ bills."
"The most pathetic part is after the judgement when they are arguing about who should pay the other party’s costs."
"Lots of affidavits filed citing the 'emotional distress' they had to endure, or painting themselves as brave warriors who were forced to take a stand to fight for 'justice'."
"Also lots of pompous litigants insisting that the judge refer to them by their 'Dr' title."
"An absolutely insane dumpster fire of entitled rich people problems."- ElectrocRaisin
It's Always People With Money Who Don't Want To Pay!
"I work in a public library."
"People will get so so mad if they have to be put on a wait list for a book."
"A popular book that just came out."
"Ok our services are not only free but so are the books."
"You’re welcome, a**holes."- Switchbladekitten
A Warm Butt Is A Happy Butt!
"My own."
"We have a bidet toilet seat (Fabulous! Everyone should have one!) and not only does it wash your bum and blow dry it, but the seat's heated!"
"It's shocking how much a heated toilet seat makes the whole process more agreeable."
"Except: We had a power outage and I went to use the toilet and the seat was cold!"
"Unacceptable!"
"This shall not stand!"
"I was really upset because it didn't feel good."
"Then I stopped and thought: This is the most first-world problem anyone's ever had."
"I was really pissed because my heiny was tepid."
"I got over it."- DeathGrover
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Holy Matrimony!
"Weddings are a gold mine for this question."
"People get so hyped up over their 'most important day of their life'."
"They'll destroy friendships, go into debt, and have crazy expectations."
"It's not always the couple who go crazy, either."
"Sometimes, it's the parents or another family member who feels entitled to control the wedding."
"It's just a party."
"Be considerate of guests, have plenty of food and drinks, and enjoy it."- magicrowantree
When Fast Food Isn't Fast Enough...
"Having to pull off to the side to wait for a drive-thru order to be brought out to you because your food isn't ready and there's a line building up behind you."- demanbmore
In Case You Don't Think Customer Service Employees Are Undervalued...
"I was working the return desk at a Target next to a military base so I have so many stories."
"One of my favorites was a lady who had her baby shower before revealing the gender and was livid that she had received floral newborn diapers when she’s having a boy."
"It was a huge box of super expensive, all organic diapers, that we didn’t carry and therefore could not return."
"I cannot accurately express her fury and disgust."
"How dare either suggest her boy could wear feminine diapers."
"I suggested she donate them if she didn’t want to use them and she instead threw away the entire box."
"When she left we pulled it out and threw it in our donate bin."
"There have also been multiple times where mom’s order massive toys and when we bring them out to the car they get furious that they aren’t wrapped."
"We don’t offer wrapping services."
"Here’s the thing, if you don’t want your kids to see the toys you got them for Christmas or their bit to day DON'T BRING THE CHILD WHEN YOU PICK IT UP."
'I’ve had multiple women scream and curse me out that I had ruined their kids Christmas by bringing the toys they ordered out to the car like they requested."- clever-mermaid-mae
Customer Service Waiting GIF by Juno Calypso
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Happiest Place On Earth!
"I used to work for Disney."
"That in itself should tell you everything."
"However for fun I'll give you two specific stories one form our tech department and one from my wife who worked bookings."
"I specifically worked for their call center to help with technical issues with magic band and the website."
"Suddenly got worse huh?"
"A right of passage call everyone has at least one story of is the 'Dome call'."
"Basically there is a subset of Disney Guest (TM) that believes if it rains at Walt Disney world there is someone that will push a button to encapsulate the whole of Disney property in a dome to keep out the rain."
"I'm not kidding."
"If this button is not pushed they call our tech department to angrily ask why."
"My wife worked booking."
"Pretty much everything including Bibbidi Bobbidi boutique and Pirate's league."
"These two things did roughly the same thing difference being price and theme."
"BBB was expensive did more and was focused on princesses, pirates league did a bit less and focused on mermaids and pirates."
"Lady called up my wife, and got pissed about BBB being booked up (It goes FAAAAST)."
"Karen: 'Im going to give the phone to my daughter and I want you to tell her how you are ruining her vacation by not letting her do BBB'."
"Wife proceeds to explain how pirate's league is so much cooler and how she can be a mermaid or pirate and basically gets the kid to start demanding to their parents about how they want to be a mermaid instead of a princess."- trollsong
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The horror!
Being booked into a junior suite at Disney World instead of an executive suite!
It's almost as bad as having no money for groceries, or no food to feed you children...
Said absolutely no one.