Teachers Examine The Most Positive Trends They've Noticed In Today's Youth
It’s a fact of life that schools go through a lot of changes.
The curriculum changes, as does the way teachers are supposed to teach. The decor and building structure changes too, updating the design and generally making the school safer. The rules change, sometimes based on society, and sometimes based on that one student who did something so ridiculous, a rule was created just for that.
With all those changes happening, it stands to reason that students change as well. Kids act and react differently than they did a decade or two ago.
I remember being made fun of for “still watching cartoons” in middle school because I was obsessed with anime. I couldn't find a place to fit it until college, but now there are Anime Clubs in middle schools.
Teachers have noticed a lot of changes like these, and most of them are positive.
Curious about what those changes could be, a Redditor asked:
"Teachers of Reddit, what are some positive trends you have noticed in today's youth?"
The Popular Nerds
"Nerd/geek culture is more accepted."
– ZoiSarah
"At my school they are the ones with the largest friend groups"
– eat_crap_donkey
A For Effort
"University teacher here: My students put in way more effort than I did at their age. Granted, the system has pushed them in that direction as well, but they typically have a better idea of where they want their carreer to go and are willing to put in the effort to obtain that goal. By comparison, I and my cohort mucked about a bit more."
– Marky_Marky_Mark
A Little Kindness
"Students are not afraid to just be nice to each other. I teach elementary art and it is so nice when a kid who is pretty unskilled in art show another kid their work, and instead of getting laughed at (like when I was in school) kids are just so sweet and will say things like "Wow, I really love that!". I hear kids telling other kids "I think your work is beautiful" or "I really like your ideas!" and I just think of when I was in art kids made fun of my work. In general I really don't see kids being bullies as much as they were when I was a kid. I went to school in a really nice district too with few problems but I was bullied. Kids here have a MUCH worse home life than kids at my old school and while they could choose to take it out on others.. they don't. Kids help each other too. They know if a student is "special" and will try to help that student out. They'll offer to walk them to the bathroom, or help them with their drawing, or very politely tell them to be careful with things."
– Kighla
Safety First
"My GF is a teacher and she is amazed at how uncool drinking and driving is. Kids are like "that's stupid you will kill someone..." They literally make fun of kids who do it. In my day EVERYONE drove drunk."
"Very positive change."
– HardGayMan
Neat and Clean
"My day care kids are much more likely to wash their hands than my generation was when we were their age lol"
– Deleted User
"Kids are so much neater now, once they're about 8 or 9. They pick up after themselves, are sort of organized, and don't litter when they can help it. I've even had kids at work that couldn't reach the trash can so they'll come up to the counter and hand me their trash."
– Ninjachibi117
#AimHigher
"As a student currently in highschool, the big thing for our generation, at least in decent schools, is that failure isn't cool. Sure if you suck up to the teacher and obsess over studying you'll get made fun of a bit, but the kids getting Fs get made fun of a lot more. A lot of the 'popular' kids are actually really smart and get top grades. There's a general awareness that we all need to do well and a lot of aspiration for the future."
– Deleted User
Family Is Everything
"Kids are openly kind and loving regarding their parents. I had a tough football player day in class once, “I love my mom, she’s my best friend!” I see the old “Ugh my parents suuuuuuck!” mentality falling by the wayside recently."
– likelazarus
"Yes! My 15 year old daughter blew me a kiss and waved when I dropped her off for school today."
"I remembered when my mom dropped me off at school as a teen and if she told me she loved me after I opened the door, I wouldn't say it back. I thought about that when my daughter did that and wondered if its just because she loves me so much or was I really that embarrassed to love my mom??? Lol"
– SherlockHolmes
Evolution Of Creativity
"Taught art for a spell a while back:"
"I know that a lot of people say sh*t like “oh these children and their all-consuming technology”, but a lot of kids are so excited about learning to make things using their devices."
"A big part of the sculpture class I taught was to make a statement using a 3D printed sculpture."
"Even take something like Minecraft, I know it’s a big meme, but it’s a huge sandbox to build things. I remember being a young teen when I came out- we would get so complex with our builds."
"Kids are learning to create in an incredibly different way. It can be really irritating when they latch onto something and run it into the ground, but they love learning new things, and creating new things, in an increasingly relevant way."
– rehab_baby
Reduction Of Bullying
"As someone who is a youth of today, ive literally never seen bullying where i live people are kind of d*cks sometimes but not bullies"
– ScRuBlOrD95
"I can agree. As I got older I noticed that kids don’t bully as much. They just leave the people they don’t like alone. When I was in high I didn’t notice any bullying. All my issues had to do with me willingly being around the wrong people."
"Edit: I’m not saying bullying doesn’t exist anymore, I’m just saying that it’s decreasing. I was bullied until high school so I know what the different forms of bullying can be like. I was excluded and made fun of. When I got to high school, people just left people like me and others alone."
– DabLikeWizKhalifa
Supportive Friends
"Not a teacher, but theres a group of boys in my class who befriended a boy with autism, and it's so sweet seeing him being included. He was just new to the school & it was so nice seeing them all help him out and be so kind."
– Deleted User
Too Wholesome For Words
"Being excepting of security and gender identity and mental illness"
"Real Convo I over heard in my class"
"Jock 1: hey, I think I want to be a girl"
"Jock 2: pauses"
"Me: praying for no transphobia"
"Jock 2: that's ok! When do you want me to switch pronouns?"
"Jock 1: after summer :)"
"Jock 2: what do you want your new name to be?"
– unfazed_Peacock
Enemies To Friends
"Am in HS, I have friends I used to fight in Middle school, it's probably us being more mature but when you start to think about it its truly amazing that people you 100% despised 6 years ago are now the people you sit with at lunch"
– lightning-pro19
It's Cool To Succeed
"The “popular” kids in my school all get good grades and try to be the best they can be. If a kid is failing school, other people think they’re a loser and no one would hang out with them. This pushes many kids to get good grades and accomplish their goals"
– Deleted User
Easier To Be Who You Are
"Lol I’m not a teacher but my brother is currently in middle school and it sounds like middle school kids today are way better than when I was in middle school almost 10 years ago. I was talking to him about school, and he told me about this anti-bullying PSA group project that I also remember doing when I was his age. The message that his teacher assigned his group was “It’s ok to be gay”. When I was in middle school, gay marriage wasn’t legal yet and the idea that being gay is not morally wrong was still considered an opinion. And I went to a public school, so all of our teachers were required to be politically neutral, which means that no teacher could’ve ever assigned that as a project when I was his age."
"Teachers were obviously allowed to step in if kids were getting bullied for being gay, but they couldn’t say that being gay isn’t a bad thing, so they just had to say be nice to each other. I didn’t realize it at the time because I was a kid, but in retrospect, that kind of thing teaches kids that it’s acceptable to be homophobic."
"He also told me that one of the kids in his class is gay, which I thought was awesome because it means middle school students feel safe and comfortable being openly gay in that school now. And I mean I grew up in a super liberal and educated college town, so me and most of my classmates then already believed that gay marriage should be legal by the time we were in middle school. But despite that, no one in my grade ever came out as gay while we were in middle school. And I mean, it’s no wonder, because my friends and I used to unironically say “that’s gay” as an insult. And I mean, my brother’s just a kid, so obviously I don’t know his sexuality. But he plays hockey and lacrosse, which means he’s definitely the kind of athletic white boy that would’ve been super homophobic when I was a kid lol so hearing him be nice and accepting towards other kids makes me really happy"
"When I was in middle school, the students and teachers all had a really poor understanding of gay rights. But now, it’s only been like eight years and schools are teaching “It’s OK to be gay” as a fact, not and opinion. And obviously the kid themselves are treating each other way better than when I was in middle school. So yeah, I’m really proud of him and all the other students at his school for that. I’m excited to see the world when these kids who are being raised to actually respect each other grow up."
– Iowadoesnotexist
Younger Doesn't Mean Lesser
"I work in an after care and I routinely see our older 5th graders helping, engaging, and involving the young kids, especially the kindergarteners. For example, the older kids will let the kindergarteners score a goal in soccer or allow themselves to be hit when playing dodgeball all for the sake of involving a younger kid and helping to make their experience more memorable."
– lilbigman2020
One Kid Can Make A Difference
"High school teacher here. These kids know how tough the world is becoming (political divisions, climate change, lack of privacy due to ever increasing technology, etc.) and they are still optimistic about what good they can do now to make things better."
"I don’t remember being this socially aware in high school."
– zkwalker
Growing Up Fast
"Parents are by and large sh*tty and unavailable to their children. As a result, children are becoming much more mature, much earlier. Kinda sad for their childhood but excited for their future."
– puckbeaverton
Wear What You Want
"Not in High School and not a teacher, but my lil sis is a HS senior. One day a male student came to school in a dress. He was suspended by the principal (this is Texas). The next day, when the students learned, they walked out, refused to do their work, and actively made school officials feel like villians until the school issued an apology."
– DunmerQueen
Eradication Of Gender "Norms"
"Im 26 and not a teacher, but another remarkable thing im noticing thats not mentioned often yet, is that the categorization of male and female behaviour and activities is blurring (good thing) too. Guys can say that something is cute now, hug eachother and go to a spa to relax for example, but if you did that during my highschoolperiod you would immediately be called gay
or weird. Girls can play videogames now or do extreme sports without being called a nerd or manly, heck its even attractive now!"
"Reading all the comments, I feel like equality is the main theme going on here. The empathy, less bullying and earlier emotional maturity can all be boiled down to equality. Hierarchical sociaties and companies are getting more and more frowned upon and I love it. I think humanity as a whole will improve immensely if this trend continues through not only this generation, but also the next and the next after that. GO YOUTH!"
– Koelkastlamp
Eco-Kids
"The 8 year olds I teach really make a huge deal about plastic. We watched the Blue Planet 2 episode with them and since then they have been so mindful and really want to protect the oceans"
– Mxttjxmes
"My 11 year old asked for reusable straws for Christmas. So yeah, they are definitely more fired up about protecting the environment than we are."
– gopms
I’m beyond happy to know youth culture is evolving this way!
Do you have any trends to add to the list? Let us know in the comments below.
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People Who Accidentally Sent A Family Member A Nude Picture Describe The Aftermath
Why in this day and age are people still taking nudie pics without triple-checking the recipient?
Why take the gamble?
And half of the time we hit send, mistakes get made.
One minute you're feeling sexy, the next minute grandpa is having a stroke.
Be careful.
Redditor Im_A_Freakin_Joke wanted to hear about the times people have sent photos to the family that left everyone SHOOK, so they asked:
"Redditors who accidental sent a family member a nude, what was the aftermath?"
I have done many things, but I never allow a snapshot.
Gross
Vacuuming Clean Up GIF by MashedGiphy"'You should clean your room before you take that.'"
Emergency_faceplant
What's What?!
"I meant to send it to someone on WhatsApp that I was dating at the time and didn’t realize I accidentally sent it to my brother, their names were next to each other in my chat list and I chose the wrong one. I frantically called my sister in law and told her what happened and begged her to go into his phone and delete the message with the photo."
"This is before WhatsApp added the functionality to delete your own messages. She was so sweet and understanding and deleted the message. I was so embarrassed. To this day she has kept my secret, this happened five years ago."
room_temp_butter
Bad Pics
"For context, my mom had some life-threatening medical issues when I was a kid, so there were a few month+ long periods where we rarely saw her. One night, I got a text from her that says 'send me a pic of u in bed."
"I thought she wanted a picture of me and my dog snuggling, as he slept with me and was the cutest sleeper. I usually sent her one every few days, even when she was home. It also doubled as her way to make sure I was following my bedtime."
"I was taking the picture, and I get a follow-up 'ignore that' text. At the same time, my dad opens my door so hard the hinges break. He says 'you get a text from mama?' I say yeah, and he says, 'it wasn't meant for you.' And leaves. I felt weird about it for days, even though it was years before I figured it out."
bleeding_inkheart
Leave it there...
"I happened to live across the street at the time and a dirty message meant for my now wife was sent to my mother! Luckily for me my mom is notorious for ignoring her phone so I sprinted across the street and said 'hey where is your phone' she told me it was on her desk so I calmly walked over unlocked it and deleted the message. In response to the look of confusion I told her 'deleted a message that was meant for now wife...' And left it at that."
Twandle_D-Vorago
AHHHH!!!! NO!
Awkward Episode 1 GIF by HeelsGiphy"One time my dad accidentally texted me 'sex if the Patriots win' and I still don’t believe I have recovered."
ayepeyday
Mom and dad have their own lives.
Disconnect
GIF by NETFLIXGiphy"I didn't accidentally send a nude, but my phone did auto upload ALL my pictures when I connected it to my mom's computer. I'm no longer allowed to connect hardware to my mom's computer."
teethalarm
Hey Sis...
"I gave my sister my old Iphone (I’m 25, she’s 22). She didn’t realize that her photos were uploading to my cloud and when I went to send a photo to a coworker, at work mind you, I see her pasty a**. I immediately text her and was like STOP TAKING PHOTOS. She called me and asked if I was okay and I told her what was happening. She responded with 'My a** look good though,' and I died laughing. Love my sis, but Christ."
PushingPepperoni
Shower Scene
"I didn’t sent a nude. I was in the shower, about age 15, and I heard the phone ring. My best friend had a habit of calling while I was showering. So, I bolted out naked as the day I was born to grab the phone before she hung up. I didn’t realize pretty much my entire dad’s side of the family was visiting my terminally ill mother."
"They saw it all. My aunt jokingly said, 'Well, dang, I didn’t know there was gonna be a show.' And someone said, 'we were just joking when we said you’d grow up to be a stripper.' I had to do a walk of shame back to the bathroom as well."
"It was laughed off and it hasn’t been brought up since."
TheSaltyMelon
Let me see...
"Sent a pic of my boobs to my mom. Managed to convince her I was trying to take a pic of what I thought was a lump but ended up dropping my phone and sent it while fumbling. Which has happened before. But then she made me show her where I thought the lump was so that was very awkward."
3milyBlazze
Recover Mode
delete black and white GIFGiphy"I once sent a pic to a GF in college when we were home for break… only I searched her contact by last name and accidentally sent it to her mom!"
"Thankfully it was late and she was able to sneak into her parents’ room and delete it before they saw."
BleekerTheBard
What have we learned?
At the very least, triple-check who you are sending it to one whichever app you use for that sort of thing.
People Share The Things They Learned Embarrassingly Late In Life
There is so much to learn in the world, it's impossible for one person to know absolutely everything there is to know.
But there are certain things, like common phrases and idioms, that everyone seems to use that might be a little embarrassing to not understand until later in life.
Redditor Curious-2577 asked:
"What's something you learned 'embarrassingly late' in life?"
Addictive Personality
"My sister was in her fifties when she found out the meaning of, 'You have an addictive personality.'"
"She thought after all these years of therapy that it meant that people were addicted to her personality."
"We laughed hysterically when we talked about this (in a very sad way)."
- casper02127
Horse Toes
"I thought that horses had toes until I was 22. I thought the hoof was a 'horseshoe' and the toes were tucked inside."
"How did I learn how wrong I was, you ask?"
"I was walking past a cavalry museum and saw a horse statue and loudly remarked, 'It must hurt so bad when they fold a horse’s toes to put them into the shoe!'"
"Dozens of horse enthusiasts turned and looked at me with wild bewilderment in their eyes."
- BronNatsPulisic
Referencing Flowers
"The saying is, in fact, 'Nip it in the bud' and not 'Nip it in the butt.'"
- too_sharp
Pastures New
"A few months ago, two of my colleagues both handed in their notice at around the same time."
"I kept reading/hearing the sentence, 'They’re both moving on to pastures new’ being thrown about the office in the weeks leading up to them leaving, and I hadn’t heard this phrase before and thought that was the name of the rival company that they were going to, like, 'Pastures New.'"
"I thought it was weird that nobody was talking about how they were both leaving for the same company."
"I was in the car with one of the two people who were leaving and said, 'So where is it that you and X are going to be working? Is it...’"
"And just before I could embarrass myself and say ‘Pastures New,' they interrupted me and said they’re not going to the same place and asked me where I had heard that."
"I think at that moment, I realized I was stupid and didn’t mention it again."
- WorriedSoft
Mario Brothers
"I think I was in college when I realized that Mario and Luigi are plumbers. I thought they just went and up down these tubes just because that was the theme of the game."
- dontbemystalker
Bonsai Trees
"That Bonsai are not a species of tree, but a way to grow them. Any tree can be a bonsai."
- ixent
Houston, We Have a Problem
"Houston is not the name of the guy astronauts talk to."
- vienna_versailles
Cowboy Beans
"I learned that pork and beans are not called 'cowboy beans.' I was 18 and asked a grocery store clerk to help me find the 'cowboy beans.'"
"We were looking everywhere and I was getting frustrated because I know that every store carries these beans. After a while, I picked up a pork and beans can with a picture and said, 'See, they look just like this!'"
"He said, 'You mean pork and beans?'"
"Then I realized that my mom called them that so that I would eat them."
"The look of disappointment from that grocery store clerk haunts me to this day."
- whyunoletmepost
The Pulitzer
"Let me tell you about how I thought you were awarded a 'Pullet Surprise.'"
- BendyBrains
Rum and Coke
"Not too late in life, but I thought my parents were making 'Roman Cokes' until I went to college."
"Which, I think is a much better name for the drink (Rum and Coke) anyway."
- Th3seViolentDelights
Oh No, Not Acoma!
"That a coma was 'A' coma. Until I was probably 19 or so, I thought it was 'acoma.'"
"I thought you fell into acoma."
- FightWithBrickWalls
It Must Have Been a One-Way Trip
"My parents were divorced the whole time and my mom was not, in fact, taking a vacation, lmao (laughing my a** off)."
- artemus_who
Multitasking
"I live near the Hospital for Joint Diseases… when I was a kid, I thought was a special hospital for people who had two or more different diseases at the same time."
- Baffhy_Duck
Ore-Ida Fries
"Moving cross-country, driving east to west, and crossing from Idaho to Oregon, I noticed huge fields with signs for the Ore-Ida Potato company."
"So I was in my early 20s when I figured out Ore-Ida wasn’t just a brand name but was because their potatoes came from Oregon and Idaho."
- Deadhawk142
Kid Logic
"When I was really young, my sister told me she threw her guts up. So I was really afraid of vomiting my entire insides up for years."
- Presitigious_Sweet_50
Some of these really had us laughing as we realized the revelations some of these Redditors were having.
But when we're really honest with ourselves, we probably didn't figure out some of these until later, too.
People Break Down The Absolute Worst Parts About Having A Child
While starting a family and having children is a goal that many people have, some do not realize that it's not easy, fun, and loving one-hundred percent of the time. Rather, it's expensive, exhausting, and hard, though it might be worth it in the end.
With this in mind, people shared what they felt were the hardest hurdles of their parenting.
Redditor ApprehensiveShock655 asked:
"What's the worst part of having a child?"
Fear of Not Doing Enough
"The constant anxiety that you’re doing enough to shape them to make good choices, a good life, be a good person and for them to have the life they deserve."
- nakedreturnsthe1st
Like the Energizer Bunny
"It's incessant. It never stops. You never get a day off."
"Going from having two days per week to relax and do whatever to literally never having a moment free from responsibility."
- mrbuh
No Break In Sight
"I’ve always wanted kids and still do, but this is the only thing that has come close to giving me pause."
"Both my siblings have young kids and I cannot get over how CONSTANT it is."
"From the second the kids wake up to when they finally shut their eyes, it’s non-stop. Then they get maybe an hour or two to themselves, which is mostly spent tidying up, etc., before the nighttime stuff starts with the baby crying, the toddler coming into bed, nightmares, etc."
"It requires years of not getting a full night's rest. You can never just go out whenever you want. No sleeping in, even on weekends because someone has to be up with them at 6 AM."
"Raising human children is an insane task."
- GirlisNo1
Mom's Body After Baby and Dad Bods
"The weight gain is the worst! During the pregnancy, I gained 35 pounds. My belly has stretch marks. My boobs are all saggy."
"And it’s not even fair because my wife only gained like 15."
- Wise-Reaction-7526
The Meal Planning
"Coming up with three meals to eat per day EVERY DAY stresses me out so bad."
"This sounds like such a small thing, but it really wears on you over time. You can’t just make something for yourself or something you and your spouse feel like eating: You have to constantly be thinking about if the kid is hungry and what they might be willing to eat."
- Ravenclaw79
Keeping Them Safe
"When people ask me this I say, 'do you know those video games where you have to escort a character to a destination without them being attacked?' That's parenting. Those missions are a pain in the a**."
- Infiniski_Gaming
Seriously, Keep Them Safe
"Having to deal with their total lack of self-preservation. They are creative and come up with all kinds of ways to try and kill themselves. Keeping ahead of the game is exhausting."
- Quizzical_Chimp
Constant Contact
"They’re just always there. On you, behind you, in front of you, just a little speed bump impeding every task."
- Tangboy500000
Letting Them Live Their Life Their Way
"Having a kid is like having a little piece of your heart running around in the world. When they're sick or get disappointed or just feel sad, it's worse than having it happen to you."
"Yet at the same time, you need to let your kids work through those things to learn to handle them. If you give into the worry and try to shield them from everything, you risk creating harmful co-dependence."
"So it's a constant struggle. But worth it!"
- um_chili
What Is "Sleep" Again?
"I'm only nine years in, but so far, it's been the sleep deprivation. Hands down."
- tessiegamgee
And What Are These "Sick Days" You Speak Of?
"Having to take care of a sick child when you are also sick. For me that has been the most challenging part so far."
- MrsLouisaMercury
Another Full-Time Job
"It's like taking a second job that lasts 18+ years with a 24/7 schedule with no holidays or sick days."
"…And no second paycheck. It's actually like YOU are paying your second salary instead of getting one."
- mouse_rat
Personal Freedom
"The loss of freedom. I can't just... go somewhere. Even with older kids, there's so much planning and thinking and getting ready."
"I miss being able to just decide to go somewhere, and go there."
- poetris
The Time Flies
"The best advice I got was from an ancient hospital security guard in an elevator. 'The days are long, the years are short, cherish them while you can.'"
- WayOfTheHouseHusband
So Unexpected
"The phrase I hate is, 'You don't know it, but one day you pick your kid up for the last time.'"
- 3_pac
There are all kinds of troubles that come from being a parent, many of which people don't necessarily think about until they already have a baby in the house.
But reassuringly, many people in the subReddit pointed out that no matter how hard some of these hurdles are to get over, it's still worth it in the end, and it goes by far too fast.
Married People Explain How They Tactfully Initiate Sex With Their Partner
Positive emotions are high among people in the blossoming phase of relationships.
Everything seems more romanticized for people in love due to the amorous joy in their hearts–which also influences their desire to frequently get it on under the sheets–or any other daring location in the heat of the moment.
But for those who've declared "'til death do us part," devoted couples may find that they are not always on the same wavelength sexually compared to when they first met.
Curious to hear how people keep their passion alive, Redditor Rude_Phone6841 asked:
"Married people, how do you initiate sex with your partner?"
When verbally articulating isn't enough...
Let The Book Dictate When
"There is a book called 'How to Subtly Tell Your Partner You Want More Sex.' If you sleep on the right side of the bed, you can casually open it up and your spouse will see the giant printed title on the front. Sometimes, I’ll just get the book out and leave it on his side of the bed. Once he was messing with me and acting like he was oblivious to my not-so-subtle hints, so I threw the book at him. The book is effective and hilarious."
"ETA: Sadly, we haven’t found the book since we moved. Fortunately, we’ve started communicating with our words instead. Words are just as effective."
– Flaky_Finding_3902
Save The Date
"I send her an outlook calendar event and if she accepts, IT'S ON."
– Dawn_Piano
The Signal
"You know when I’m down to my socks it’s time for business."
– SEA___BEAR
These couples find that verbal cues are best.
Now's The Time
"Honestly when we have the time one of us usually bluntly says 'let's go have sex right f'king now before we can't' and we go do it. Lol"
– brie1305
Option A Or B
"I have a 2 month old and a 2 year old. Some of the best sex we had was because I said 'after 2 year old goes down and if 2month decides to sleep do you want to meet in the basement' well she decided to sleep and damn that was good."
– Ahkmedjubar
End Of Day Reward
"We just ask each other tbh. We’ll bring it up earlier in the day so we build up the anticipation with each other throughout the day, flirt with each other, gas each other up. All that. Then when it’s finally time at the end of the day, we usually fall asleep cause we’re so tired."
"But the cycle continues the next day!"
– supermariobruhh
People continued offering their wisdom.
Afternoon Hanky Panky
"The trick is to initiate sex during the day. We are both too tired at the end. Plus hanging out all day after is somehow more rewarding."
"Same goes for dates. Have sex at the beginning the date, then go enjoy your time together without any pressure."
– drneeley
Kids In The Equation
"This literally happened today with my wife and me. We have two toddlers so we’re extra exhausted. Earlier today we had the sexy initiation of 'hey, we both showered today, want to have sex after the babies are asleep?' 'Sure.'"
"Then when the kids were asleep, and my wife and I were getting settled into bed, she asked if I still wanted to. I said if she wants to I’m down, but I’m pretty tired and would be fine without it. She said she was also tired and could do without it. So we kissed each other good night and she went to sleep. I’m just winding down on Reddit for a few minutes before I also fall asleep."
"I know this is boring. I didn’t write this to tell an exciting story. Just to share what married life is like for me and probably the large majority of married couples, especially parents of young kids."
– MolotovCollective
Shadow Puppet Technique
"Use my phones torch to shine a shadow of my member up against the bedroom wall."
"Kinda like a bat signal of sorts."
– SchoonerOclock
Mood Lighting
"Turn off the lights and switch on the red lamp beside the bed."
– SuvenPan
Reliable Visual
"Walk by him while taking my top off. He follows me wherever I go and it's been 30 years and counting."
– LisaBooHigh
Every couple is different, and usually establishing a strong communication bond makes everything else in the relationship–including sexy time–falls in line effortlessly.
I knew a couple who made a game out of foreplay and agreed that whoever got home first from getting off work at the same time got to choose the sexual position that night.
They may no longer be together, but I remember them recalling how that technique was fun for them at the beginning stage and it took the pressure off of establishing when they were going to have sex.
Don't take get too anxious about it. It's just sex, and it's fun.