"HIM AGAIN?"

"The mailman still showing up everyday, after clearly telling him that he is not welcome here" -- whipwhip2

"The audacity" -- saltygipsy

"My one dog hates the mailman so much he gets mad at other letter carriers on different streets, if he sees them." -- justfortoday2017

Reverse ASMR

"My dog hates that raspberry sound people make with their lips. He will charge across the room, jump in my lap, pretend he's going to bite me then lick my face. Then glare at me."

"If I do it again he will leave the room. Somehow he leaves the impression he has gone to call someone and complain."

-- DancingBear2020

Posh

"My dog has a sensitive butthole and refuses to poop on a lawn unless it is cut to the correct length and has a proper grass consistency." -- mahelke

"Oh god, ours does too. He won't let other dogs sniff his butt, he only does the sniffing. I feel like I have to apologize to other dog owners for it. It stems from an unfortunate vet trip he had to make as a puppy after he ate a sock."

"They had to 'extract' it (and get sprayed by a waterfall of dookoo in the process)" -- SravBlu

Very Good to Know

"My friend's cockatiel gets mad when you don't let him play with your feet. Cockatiels have a weird foot fetish.....no, seriously, Google it." -- eF240uKX52hp

"Cockatiels are sooo much personality stuffed in a tiny fragile body. I had one growing up that loved seafood and landed on the table during dinner, grabbed a lobster claw/leg/thing, and tried to run off with it. Of course, her run was more like an awkward waddle because the lobster claw was almost 2x her body length" -- naps_and_cake

More Complex Than We Thought

"Seeing any of the bottom of the food bowl" -- mattreyu

"Yes. Seeing the bottom of the food bowl is apparently a dire kitty emergency. Especially at 2 am." -- FrostyBeav

"I read once that cats don't like seeing the bottom of the food bowl because of their whiskers. It's not that they hate the bottom of the food bowl, they hate eating out of the edges, because it touches their whiskers and squigs them out.

"Cats (at least non chonk cats) can fit through any opening their head fits through, and they determine this with their whiskers. So eating out of the corner of the bowl makes their whiskers touch, and this makes them uneasy." -- SavvySillybug

Not a Chicken Leg Fan

"My dog lies down with his legs pointing backwards making his rear look like a cooked chicken so I grab his legs and yell CHICKEN LEGS!!!! Let me tell you, he does not like that" -- iicow_dudii

"Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens,
Your dog's legs look like rotisserie chicken." -- MissHillary

Temptation

"She does. It's when I touch her toes." -- ooglecat

"It's not fair. They look so touchable." -- EssentialHeart

"I love to stick my finger between my cats toe beans because he has these adorable tufts of hair sticking out between them and he hates it when I do this." -- writingwithmovement

"No human can resist the allure of toebeans!" -- naps_and_cake

Fashionista

"My doggo hates crocs... will try and take them and bury them. Essentially doing a public service" -- opportunistic_trex

"We had a lab that moved in, immediately hid my red garden Crocs in his blankets, and took them out to hump them every night. He was bucket-list age so we let him. My wife was not sad to see them go." -- Catsrecliner1

"Your dog is cultured AF." -- thespotts

Cats Against Drum Nerds

"She does, actually. My cat does not like when I play air drums. When I do, she comes over and sits on my feet, or gently places her paw on my hand. 'Please stop, human. I'm trying to sleep.' " -- InternetKidsAreMean

"When I play air guitar, my dog hears every mistake." -- elee0228

"Opposite, my cat actively thinks it's play time When I'm playing real drums. Just wants to hit the skins too. I have to lock her out. (It's an electronic kit so it doesn't blast anyone's ear drums)" -- ghoulsmashrr

Fickle Creatures

"Not getting enough attention and then getting attention. Yes, it's a cat." -- Merry_Pippins

"Pet me, pet me, pet me! NOM Stop petting me! NOM Why did you stop petting me?!" -- Malzun

"In our household we call this 'pet me with your eyes' " -- milkymoocowmoo

"I am convinced that my dachshund is a cat in a dog-shaped trenchcoat for this very reason." -- LeMoomin

Steady Now

"A moving lap. Any sign of movement not contributing to stroking is a sign of an imminent catastrophe, prompting immediate execution of emergency procedures."

"Emergency procedures involve evacuating to the arm of the sofa until the lap has stabilised. After assessment, it may be recolonised."

-- Further_slimeking

Anti-Shredding

"My dog has a ton of pet peeves... She can't stand the guitar, dislikes being hugged and touched in general, and dislikes being in water."

"Even with all her dislikes, she's adorable, puts up with hugging even though she walks away as soon as possible, and looks so sad during bath time but stays still and let's it happen. She's a good girl."

-- totaln00b

Triggered

"Anybody being in the pool. He fell in when he was a puppy and since then he has barked and growled at people who get into the pool. If you go under water he jumps in and tries to 'help' you, but ends up scratching you with his claws. (He is a pure breed German shepherd, and a big one at that)"

-- darkhub4

Like Clockwork

"Cat- being picked up or getting her belly touched. Also, me singing at her."

"On the plus side though, whenever I want to play with her, all I have to do is lay on my belly and hum the Jurassic Park theme song. She'll crouch into hunting position, and slowly creep her wait to me until she pounces, and batts my face (with her claws in so I know she's playing) and I laugh and we then break out bouncy balls and play a game of soccer."

-- CoulsonsMay

Posh Taste

"Mr. Kitty loves his jeweled collar, with its faux jewels of different colors gleaming in the light. He wears it proudly."

"However, he refuses to wear any other type of color. It's got to have multicolored jewels, or he 'MROW's' in protest to anything else."

-- Back2Bach

The Wrong Kind of Talking

"My cat LOATHES when my wife reads aloud. The cat loves when she talks to him."

"But heaven forbid that my wife attempt to read aloud! It does not matter if it is the instruction manual to the TV remote, a wedding invitation, or a section from a Harry Potter book, the cat will charge at my wife and bite her in the face until she stops reading."

-- Geemanneff

3 Strike Policy

"Having his tail touched."

"You generally get two warnings, three if he's feeling patient with you. The first warning is a growl. The second is a hiss."

"After that, out come the claws and fangs. Best not to have exposed eyes at that point, because that's what he's going for. Other than that, he's a perfectly well-adjusted and lovable Siamese."

-- shugerbooger