What's up with public marriage proposals? I certainly wouldn't want that kind of pressure. But even those aren't the weirdest kind. How about popping the question on a game show? Or pretending to break up with someone, only to propose? And I can't even get a text back...
Champagne_tatertots asked: What's the worst marriage proposal story you've ever heard?
Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.
Dad - subtlety master.
My parents. They were in the produce section of a grocery store when my dad says "all our friends are getting married we should too."
My mom thinking he was joking just said yea and moved on with shopping. A couple days later she got to thinking about it and with the serious way he said it had her confused.
She goes to him and asks if it was a serious question or if he really was just kidding around. He responds with "well yea I thought we were engaged now" 34 years later and they're still married.
Next time just stick with "hi mom."
I remember seeing a YouTube video about a guy who proposed on some light-hearted late night game show or something. Everyone was getting into the fun, happy, late-night vibe except the woman, who had a look of pure horror on her face. Eventually she whispers "Can we.....can we talk about this later? Please?"
The juxtaposition between the humiliated couple and the cheesy party backing music, just made it hilariously tragic.
I think I remember that. I think they had only been dating for a month and the lady was wigged out.
Reminds me of the scene from the office when Michael asks Carol to marry him.
"You're trash Brock."
If you wanna say no, say no.
I had a Disneyland proposal. My ex and I went there for Christmas after 4 months of dating. 2nd day we were waiting in line for the haunted Mansion, and he suggested we get a pic on the steps.
I'm standing there trying to smile for a picture and he gets down on one knee and goes at it while a cast member takes a video. People are noticing and cheering for us. I was totally blindsided.
I felt like I had no choice but to say yes, even though I really did not want to. The ring was given to him by a friend, and was ugly, not my style, and not even close to my size.
When we got home he manipulated me into letting him move in with me and I was stuck with him for another year until I managed to move myself away, get some distance, and leave him. It was terrible. I should have risked him leaving me on the side of the road in California instead.
This story sucks, but not because of you, but the way you were pressured into it. A proposal should be private!
I don't know the specifics but it kind of seems like the whole situation would've been fixed by just saying no.
Also if a guy gets you an ugly ring it means he doesn't love you.
Gotta admire the courage.
Our 6th grade English teacher told us of how a kid found a ring in the parking lot and proposed to her.
Um ok.
I'm on good terms with one of my ex-girlfriends, so I got to hear this story of how her husband proposed to her:
They were sitting around their apartment one day and he asks her, "hey, can you get my phone from the bedroom?" Okay, she gets his phone for him.
A minute passes. "Hey, can you get me a glass of water?" She gets him a glass of water. Another minute passes. "Hey, can you bring me that pair of socks on top of my dresser?"
She gets the socks. The ring is in the socks. He proposes. He actually thought he was being romantic. She thought it was weird as f*ck.
Even weirder, she said yes, and they've been married for more than ten years.
This is so weird and funny! What's with the lead up of making her get other things first?
Maybe he forgot which mundane item he'd stashed the ring in.
"Huh.... not the socks.... bring me the cat."
Sounds like a totally healthy relationship.
My buddy's girlfriend kept telling him that he couldn't surprise her. After college, they were planning to move together to another town.
About 6 months before graduation, he told her he wasn't sure about the move or their relationship. She turned around to cry. He called her name, and when she turned back, he was on one knee. Did it to surprise her.
I'm not sure I want to be your boyfriend anymore...
BECAUSE I WANT TO BE YOUR HUSBAND!
This guy's a douche don't marry him.
A friend of my sister had specifically told her boyfriend she hated public proposals and didn't want a bunch of people there, so what does he do but gather their entire extended family to do it. Ugh.
Did she say yes still? I would take that at as a red flag for marriage
They'd been together for years. He's actually a good guy, just committed this one egregious faux pas.
She said no? Good.
One day he drives her to a surprise location for a date. He takes her to this random house in the suburbs with a dog tied up in the front lawn.
He then proceeds to propose and explain how her bought the house of their dreams, dog included, and how they could raise their children here.
The woman (my friend) was so flabbergasted that all she said was something like "wtf, you bought a house and a dog without even telling me?"
He thought he was making this grand romantic gesture, but she was super annoyed that he had apparently arranged their whole lives without even asking for her input.
Needless to say she said no. Last I heard he lived in the house for a bit and then sold it for a loss. No mention of the dog, but I'm hoping it wound up with a good family.
Think fast before you say yes.
My dad walked through the living room and tossed a ring at my mom. 27 years married btw.
"Hey babe, think fast!" chucks ring box at girlfriend.
Nice, Gram.
My grandmother stopped a bad proposal;
After a great night out, my grandfather said "the ring is in the glove box, if you want it"
She demanded he get out of the car and propose like a man. They were married for 60+ years.
How romantic.
Apparently when a friend of mine and his girlfriend got engaged it was because they were arguing in a restaurant and he just said "DO YOU JUST WANT ME TO PROPOSE TO YOU?!".
She apparently took that as an actual proposal and talked about how cute it was to other people. She was a bridezilla during the whole planning stage, they DID get married, and then she admitted that she had cheated on him with an old college boyfriend and was moved out of their apartment before they even hit the 6 month mark.
And people were shocked when his best friend said that he would not give them their blessing... sounds like dude was right not to.
My teeth itch.
Me and my sister went to watch twilight new moon when it first came out and when we walked into the theatre this guy and girl were up in front of the whole theatre giving a speech about how she was his lamb and he was a lion a la first twilight cringe Edward speech to Bella.
He proposed, she said yes, and they then proceeded to sit down and watch that mess of a movie. I was shook and I still feel the cringe to this day. It wasn't even a nice theatre lmao
What year is it again?
I CAN ACTUALLY ANSWER THIS ONE (but it's actually a really sad answer)
My housemate just told me about how one of her friends back home just got engaged.
My housemate comes from a *very* religious community. Like, they have their own shops, restaurants, their own college. They used to have their own high school but it got shut down for some reason.
Anyway, the friend's fiancé proposed to her 20+ times over the course of several months. The church encouraged him to keep on harassing her, and the church shamed her into giving in.
They told her that it was her "duty" as a woman to get married and have children, and that she was getting too old anyway (she's 27!).
Eventually the friend broke down and agreed to marry him. All of her female friends, her sister and her mother are all trying to convince her not to go through with it, but she's made up her mind.
I think they're getting married in April.
the friend's fiancé proposed to her 20+ times over the course of several months. The church encouraged him to keep on harassing her, and the church shamed her into giving in. They told her that it was her "duty" as a woman to get married and have children, and that she was getting too old anyway (she's 27!).
Yikes. I feel so bad for her.
I do too. It's a really sad situation.
I think the saddest part is that she's started to believe what the church told her. She says that breaking off the engagement would be "selfish, because it would be denying her fiancé a wife."
Awww.
Not bad, just so so silly, and it's all mine
My husband and I had gone to our favorite lake, and he was beyond nervous. I knew it was coming because he's just not able to surprise me lol.
So we get to our spot, and he just stands there shivering with me on his arm, looking over the lake and watching a pair of geese mosey around near us.
Eventually, he asked me if he should pick up a stick that was laying nearby to throw at the geese. My "wtf no?!" shriek startled the geese to go into the water and lazily swim away.
After a few more minutes, he stuttered, "so.. uhh, you wanna marry me?" I knew it was coming, but still my mind went blank, and I replied after staring at him for a minute, "well duh". So we're definitely meant for each other!
He later told me the suggested goose assault was his panicked minds' idea to get him on his knee. What a goof, he didn't have a ring and that just wasn't our style anyway.
We were together 6 years at the time and had been discussing marriage for a while, so his fear was pretty unfounded lol
Married 2 years now, he's my forever person, and now I subconsciously associate geese with romance 😂 ❤
Why not, right?
I know I'm late but I think my wife and I qualify. We were living together, I was working full time and in school, she's working 3-11 shift and 7 months pregnant.
She just had a health scare and we were laying in bed on Tuesday morning discussing that if something happened to her, her abusive father could, potentially gain custody of our child.
Finally, laying there, I looked at her and said "you know, if we were married it wouldn't be an issue". She said, "are you serious" and I replied with "yes." She thought about it for a minute and said, "sure, let's do it."
We looked at our schedules and decided we would shower and go and get our marriage license before she had to go to work. I found a Justice of the Peace that would perform our ceremony the following Sunday (5 days later).
We told our immediate family who we wanted to attend (my Mom and best friend, her sister, Aunt, and best friend). Somehow, my mother made my wife's dress in 5 days.
Sunday we were married in an old, run down courtroom by a very nice JoP. Then we had our friends over for pizza and soda.
March will be 20 years.
Dad moves fast.
Not really a bad story, but we tease our parents for it all the time. My dad basically told my mom he wanted to marry her the night they met at a party hosted by my aunt (dad's sister).
My mom was like "heehee okay" and they started dating pretty much immediately. Keep in mind they didn't really know each other beforehand, and this dialogue happened after a few drinks.
Later, my dad "proposed" to her with a ring he made out of a napkin while waiting for her to show up to a dinner date, and they made it official with an engagement ring they found together at an antique store.
They're still happily married today with 4 kids (including me), so I guess all's well that ends well.
Somewhat of a cute story, but they're both lucky it worked out, haha.
Smooth.
My sister's husband proposed to her by sitting next to her, taking out the ring, sliding it over to her, and saying "here".
She's really big on romantic proposals. She would have loved the whole restaurant reservation, tapping the glass, proposal speech, and getting on one knee scene.
So it kind of crushed her because it seemed like he didnt make an effort. Not sure what his perspective is.
Yes or no, right now.
This isn't a terrible proposal but more one with a funny twist. My parents where celebrating New Year and my dad in the emotion of the moment said to my mom that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her that why didn't they get married.
There was no ring... Just the thought and the moment. My mom said she was going to think about it. After a month of not mentioning the topic again and my dad all anxious about what did she have to think so much about, asked her if she had already had enough time to think.
She asked "about what?"... Dad: "about we getting married" to which my mom answered "ohh that was serious?" She then took another month to this time really think about it and said yes. 30+ years now and happily married.
Fail.
My ex lied that he was going to get deported. Gave me a ring that "was his grandmother's" Which was missing a bunch of stones and not resized.
Redditor imboredaa wanted to discuss all the ways so many of us get lost watching things on the internet, so they asked:
"What are some of the craziest/strangest rabbit holes you’ve ever been down?"
I constantly get lost on talent show audition rabbit holes.
And I am proud!
Restored
Serial Killer Chainsaw GIF by Rise RecordsGiphy"YouTube videos of old chainsaw restorations. No idea why, but I guess that’s why it’s a rabbit hole. I don’t even own a chainsaw or have a need for one."
aretelio
'rooms/shared'
"I really enjoy going on a city’s Craigslist, then to 'rooms/shared' (or whatever it is for finding a room mate) and then typing words like 'warning' or 'beware' in the search to see what kind of horror show nightmare room mate scenarios people have decided to write about... it's usually some juicy headline like 'warning!!!'"
"Do NOT rent from this woman!!!! She is a PSYCHO!!….'"
"And after reading it, it’s always a guess to decide who is the actual crazy person, the landlord or tenant. Could be a bitter ex, tenant, or a scam, or whatever. But it’s an easy way to dive quick into some weird corners of the internet that are filled with drama."
After the Ice
"I spent a bunch of time about 12 years or so ago reading about all the details of the Titanic, how it sunk, what happened as it was sinking, who died, who survived. I got into the life stories of the people who died, and what became of the people who survived. And then I very nearly bought a piece of carpet from the Titanic."
SweetCosmicPope
Expeditions
"Andrée's Arctic balloon expedition"
"Dumb, then numb, a** thought he could fly a balloon to the North Pole. They had cyanide capsules and all, in case they crashed and were about to freeze to death. Or get eaten by a polar bear during a three month night. He and his assistants somehow managed to do both."
"Plot twist: Andree, the worst captain of all time, noticed the balloon was leaking the night before they were about to leave, pumped it up a bit, and said 'f**k it that'll do.' It did not do."
Needydadthrowaway
Thanks John
"An Uncle John's Bathroom Reader. Started with 1 and ended up with a 20+ collection."
originalsanitizer
"Uncle John's Bathroom Readers are so addictive."
evanman69
Toilet time can be knowledge time.
Living Sky High
City In The Sky Vfx GIF by PBSGiphy"Turning old planes into houses! About 10 years ago I found a company that would do it for you. The wings were decks and the plane was mounted to a pedestal that allowed it to be rotate with the sun!"
BeeEyeAm
Doggerland
"Mega tsunamis. Thousand foot walls of water moving at hundreds of mph? It happens more than you would think. The Azore-Gibraltar fault will cause one one day. There evidence they happened a few times in the Pacific. It doesn't take a meteor to happen, it could be an underwater landslide (Doggerland), or a large section of a volcanic island shearing off and falling into the ocean (Oahu). Doggerland is another rabbit hole that is worth googling."
KD_Burner_Account133
Hitting the Keys
"Mechanical keyboards. I wanted to buy one, so I started researching and watching videos of reviews. I went deeper and deeper, seeing special cables, obscure companies, the tons of switches, etc etc."
"I stopped when a Youtuber I watched made a video asking her viewers and discord users to stop bullying and harassing her for using some kind of switches or keycaps. I bought my keyboard and never went back to that crazy fandom."
NirvanaForce
In the Sky
"I worked in administration at an aviation academy for a few years and decided I’d start listening to aviation podcasts since I didn’t know much about it. I came across a plane crash podcast that talks about crashes in history and how it improved the safety of flying."
"I was fascinated by it, and found myself gradually needing to know more and listening to more of the same type of podcasts, watching videos, and listening to black box recordings. It was eerie but interesting at the time. Now, I regret it tremendously because since then I’ve developed horrible anxiety when flying."
contagiousphrase
The Big Questions
steve harvey lol GIF by TV Land ClassicGiphy"Spent a lot of time in the 'quantum consciousness' rabbit hole. I had just deconstructed from religion and wanted answers about life, death, and reality. It was long before I made peace with not knowing. I spent around a year obsessed with quantum experiments, psychedelics, and the general philosophy of consciousness."
excusetheblood
Lives (and chores) can be put on serious hold when you find a juicy enough topic to research!
Well, what rabbit holes have you gotten lost in? Let us know in the comments below.
Redditor Who_Did_You_Expect1 wanted to hear about the things from our memories that still haunt our nightmares, so they asked:
"What's the most f--ked up thing you saw that still haunts you to this day?"
Living through peril is unimaginable. I've been luckier than most.
Tragic
Sad Best Friends GIF by Lisa VertudachesGiphy"I watched cancer kill my baby brother. He was in grade school when I was in college. 25 years, and I still see it in my dreams."
TheDigitalRanger
Ay Dios mio, Dios mio!
"When I was about 8, my sister and I were walking with my mom to a bus stop to see my grandma in Mexico city. There was a lady on a bike crossing the intersection that we had just crossed ourselves but she didn't stop in time to the next one and didn't look both ways, she didn't have time to stop her bike. All I remember is the lady making the beginning of a scream as a white old muscle car ran over her (bike and all) at a high speed."
" remember the sound it made as it broke everywhere. My mother took her sweater off as she screamed and covered both my sister's and my head from looking, but it was too late. I remember looking at my sister with tears in her eyes, and I was too shocked to react or comprehend what I had just seen happened. A lot of people immediately surrounded the place, and the driver came out of his car and held his head with his hands after seeing the lady on the pavement."
"I didn't look at the lady anymore. I remember hearing people screaming in shock. My mother told my dad later as she cried. I remember hearing her wake up screaming for weeks after this saying: ay Dios mio, Dios mio! Still makes my heart race when I think about it."
amahied
I Quit
"I was a news photographer for a while in the 90’s. I got called out to an accident. A high school girl ran into the back of a semi. As I was shooting, I noticed her wallet was on the ground. It had a plastic picture holder and the wind was flipping back and forth. I saw her prom pictures and shots of her with her family."
"I quit being a news photographer shortly after. I never forgot that day, and it still haunts me."
No_Confusion4720
Images
"I saw the aftermath rather than the actual event. A woman was walking home from the grocery store late at night. She crossed the road without using the crosswalks and got hit by an SUV. The two images cemented in my mind are of her, embedded in the windshield, and the driver of the car standing a little ways down the street vomiting. I've never seen someone look so utterly broken as the way the driver looked. I can't imagine what he was going through."
GrowlyBear2
Everyday
Sad Rabbit GIF by Muffin & NutsGiphy"When I was 16 I was in a car wreck with my best friend since 3rd grade. I pulled him from the car with a broken shoulder while he was bloody, lifeless, limp. He died within the hour, not long after the ambulance got us. It’s been 18 years and I still think about it every single day."
oil_can_guster
I couldn't imagine living with that.
I also couldn't move...
"Coming to after getting hit by a vehicle as a pedestrian. Was face down, all I could see was blood soaked road and thought 'f**k, that doesn't look good.' I also couldn't move. The last thing I remember seeing before that was the grill of the vehicle. I still get jumpy when I catch a vehicles grill out of the corner of my eye and I'm not expecting it to be there."
"I'd seen a lot of accidents prior to that, but something about it being my own blood hit different."
"And yes, I had the right of way and was crossing in the proper place, at the proper time. Driver plain a** wasn't paying attention. It was daylight to boot, so no reason they couldn't see me."
Sweet_Force1478
Bad Dreams
"I was volunteering with my k9 working with NYC emergency services and chief Patell during 911 WTC attacks. We were in the middle of where the twin towers used to stand The thick gray dust, horrible smell of burnt things and dead people was all around but when the dogs started to find bodies and body parts it really freaked me out and I will forever live with this reality that seems like a bad dream."
DjCanicus
Missing
Confused Wile E Coyote GIF by Looney TunesGiphy"A family of four that had burned in a plane crash. I used to do a woodland search and rescue, and we saw a lot of wild crap, but I still have dreams about what I saw when we went to look for a missing plane."
JalenTargaryen
Goodness life is dark sometimes.
Do you have any similar experiences? Let us know in the comments below.
