People Share Stories About When Their Best Friends Crossed An Unspoken Line
Our best friends know us better than most people which means they know what buttons we don't like pushed. What happens when one of your best friends crosses an unspoken line?
Have you ever had a close friend cross a "line" in your relationship? If so, what happened?
Get ready for the drama!
We were friends during year 1 in university. She was kind of lonely and so was I. We were both new to the city and ended up having a "family" like relationship. We hung out nearly every day, cooked food together, did assignments, binged netflix and so on.
Then after a year or so, she started going out with this dude. I was happy for her and totally got that she didn't have as much time as before. But then, weeks went by, months went by. I soon realized that the only times she ever contacted me was when she needed something.
One time, after about four months, she called me out of the blue and asked me if we wanted to hang out sometime. I was really happy and told her "sure". Then she said "Oh, good, because I really can't afford my rent and was wondering if we could talk about if I can start living with you or something". I was caught off guard, and being a person who has a hard time saying "no" I'm pretty sure she thought I was going to say yes. However, I was able to say "I don't think that's possible. We can still make dinner sometime though". Her response was something like "Oh, okay. No problem. Yeah, I'm really busy this week so I can't do dinner".
Fastforward a year and the only time she's contacted me was when she wanted help on an assignment. At this point it is really clear that I am just something conveniant for her. So everytime she calls, I'm always up for dinner or netflix if she wants, but I am not up for helping her. I would do anything for my friends, but it has to go both ways. It really does.
She kept acquiring more cats. She couldn't afford to spay/neuter them so they bred and instead of finding them homes kept them all while she continued to buy more and more cats. She was living in the basement of a small town house. The tiny space was about the size of 3 dorm rooms. In this space she had one dog, a bird, and 18 cats. She couldn't afford to feed them all. I tried to help her, and get her food for the cats but she just used my help to justify getting more cats. I made her promise to not get anymore cats until all of her were spayed and neutered. She said yes, then bought two grey kittens. I just couldn't be friends with an animal hoarder.
Not the best person to have around
Well, after a few months i realized this dude has nothing positive to say about anything other than himself.... Ever.
He crossed the line though when he yelled at my girlfriend about "inturupting while the men are talking". Burned that bridge in about 12 minutes after we got home.
How low can you go?
Yes. I had a friend who told me not to lose weight. Mind you, I was reaching dangerous territory. Had a baby, became depressed due to PPD, ate a lot to accomodate that, ect. I pretty much just stopped caring about my weight. Until one day, my doctor advised me to lose weight. So I started doing that.
My best friend at the time wasn't happy about it. She tried sabotaging my diet, saying I was the fat friend and then she managed to lose 20 pounds and spouted on Facebook about it. I decided to do some low contact with her since she wasn't supporting me and lost 60 pounds within 8 months. I started studying towards a new career and developed a lot more hobbies.
She was not happy about that. She cried over the phone about it, saying I was becoming anorexic. Then I realised that I was some sort of f* up commodity for her selfish reasons. She took me to meet people herself and berated me in front of them in passive ways about my weight and I'm sitting here right now thinking of how much of an idiot I was.
She crossed the line and I honestly cannot understand what makes a person think this way.
Sometimes you can't trust an old friend
A close friend from college days asked if he could live with us "for a few days" while looking for employment in the area.
Instead of a job search, he spent his days hanging around the house and taking advantage of our "hospitality."
He crossed the line when I came home early from work one day and caught him with his hands in my S/O's bedroom drawers (looking for things to steal).
That was it - out he went, then and there.
When your friend almost kills your brother
When I was 12 and my brother was 10 I had over one of my only friends at the time. (Moved a town over, new school, I was awkward.)
He liked to throw knives into trees. Odd thing to let a 12 year old do but hey, boys are weird and we liked ninjas. On day he threw a knife into a wall in my house. Not that big of a deal to 12 year old me but it happened to be a foot away from my brothers head. He knew what he did, thought it would be funny and said he knew it would miss.
I lost my shit. I literally threw him out of my house and didn't speak to him for years.
The ultimate betrayal
He tried to get my gf at the time to break up with me so he could date her. Luckily she saw what he was doing. He and I were not friends for long after that. I was pretty torn up by that betrayal.
Some people are desperate
Finally a question I have an answer to. Basically I had a friend throughout high school. Seemed like a pretty chill guy, a bit of a dick but so was I so I just went with it. Between my junior and senior years though I went through some pretty major lifestyle changes, namely not being an asshole to everyone I met. He however did not. The thing that really ended that friendship for me though was when he faked being suicidal and abusing drugs in an attempt to get one of our mutual friends (now my girlfriend) to date him. It was honestly one of the cruelest things I've seen a person do in an attempt to get with a girl. Somehow though that wasn't enough, and he still borderline stalks her to this day. Creepy as hell, and I wish I had drawn the line a little sooner. Live and learn I guess.
The bad advice
Told me to make a false police report against my ex to get custody and then acted like I was the weird one when I said there was no way in h** I'd do that. Lost all respect for her after that.
What a mess!
My best friend of five years began nightly belittling me over a group chat. I was having a really hard time in life, but he found humor in making me a public joke.
He crossed the line, not when he told me that my issues were stupid and that if I was serious I should just kill myself, not when he wrote a letter to my boss telling him to fire me, not when he threatened to call a lawyer on me and sue me for xy & z (I can elaborate at the end **) , but when he posted my address and phone # on Craigslist saying I was ready for a hookup and that the men should just come right in.
Yes, I did go to the police and got a cease & desist.
_*_he was going to sue me, because after I blocked him on Facebook, his mother reached out to me and asked me what even happened. I told her I couldn't handle him belittling me over a nightly chat. Turns out, his mother never contacted me. He logged into her fb account and screenshot what I said and told me that what I'm doing is defamation of character because I'm 'attempting to' make him look bad in his mother's eyes
A turn of events
I was dating a guy for about a month, told my best friend all about him and how much I liked him. My friend and I had tickets to a music festival and the guy decided last minute he was going to come also because he liked some of the bands that were there. Went to the festival, had a great time and got an uber back to an air bnb we had rented for the weekend. Walked in, guy I was dating went to the room we were sleeping in to lay down. I go into the kitchen to get water, hear guy yelling my name, walk in on my best friend on top of guy straddling him. Uncomfortable confrontation ensues.
When they turn on you at work
Got him a job in my company so he could move to the city his girlfriend is. Then he started going after my position - friendship over. Don't work with friends.
Thhat secret that made things awkward
Had a close friend who was in a multiyear relationship with a great guy. He treated her like gold.
Out of nowhere she goes on a date with another guy. She tried to explain it as "just keeping my options open," and as no big deal, and something I shouldn't share with him.
It really changed how I saw her. Jeopardizing her relationship was bad enough, and now you're telling me about it and telling me keep it a secret?
I was happy that she transferred to another department and we quickly lost contact.
My best friend for 6+ years was having an affair with my then girlfriend behind my back. I then forgave him under the condition he'd seek psychiatric help ("I'm depressed" was his excuse) and he claimed he made an appointment. He never did and instead invested money into bitcoin. I basically told him foff then and there and he sent me all the messages of my ex girlfriend talking s and playing me for a fool behind my back. Left me with severe self confidence issues but I'm slowly recovering and glad he's gone.
That was definitely a line not to be crossed
We're not close friends anymore. Or even much of friends. I just have trouble cutting ties to someone I've known for 16 years.
He was like a brother. We both ran away from home as teens and called each other first. When his parents kicked him out, my family took him in. I was his POA while he was deployed. He stood with me when I got married.
Then one night, when we were drinking together while my husband was at Basic Training (beach bonfire trip, very common with various people), he tried to sleep with me. And let it be known that he'd always wanted more. And asked for more when I said no.
Kinda killed the friendship. And eventually he got married and his wife dislikes me. And my (ex)husband will punch him if he ever sees him again.
Bad move, and it's always when they are drunk
We had been really close friends for years, spoke every day. A nice platonic girl/guy friendship. Told him from the get go I was never interested in anything other than friendship (I'm engaged as is he). He got drunk one night, sent me a pic of his junk. Told him he crossed the line and I was never interested in seeing anything of that nature. He apologised. Things were fine for a while after then he sent another. Chewed him out for crossing a clear boundary I had set out and told him if he couldn't respect my wishes to not contact me again.
Don't mess with pain
I suffer from chronic migraines. I cancelled a camping trip last minute because that week my migraines had become unbearable and I couldn't stomach anything. The line was crossed when she lost her temper and said, "Well I taught my tumbling class today and almost broke my neck. That's real pain that you don't understand. You can't just cancel plans." Cue me in the hospital 3 days later after a week of migraines and losing 10 lbs because of the nausea and vomiting. We're not best friends anymore.
Needless to say, don't ever tell people their pain is unfounded. You don't know.
That's a line crossed for sure...
She told me on my birthday that she'd been mad about me for months and then 3 days later f* my boss.
We are no longer friends and I am no longer employed!
A different kind of crossing the line
Not the running theme of the thread, but when I was 24 my lifelong friend (since preschool) kissed me and crossed the line from friend. We have been together since (about 4 years). We are still madly in love, moved in together last year and just got a puppy.
We've all said something stupid, let's not lie to ourselves.
It's okay to say something stupid. It showcases the real person on the inside, that we're all flawed, imperfect, and made of cooky combinations of words that don't necessarily line up to make sense. Sometimes we're nervous in a situation, other times we're just hitting 'Quick Reply' in our brains and what comes out doens't work, but whatever the reason, you for sure are going to remember it, late at night, for the rest of your life.
What is the stupidest thing that ever came out of your mouth?
You may not have to change your home address because of these moments, but you should probably reconsider how many public outings you go to afterwards.
Should Probably Never Shop At That Store Again
"When the cashier said "Have a nice day", and I replied with "No, thanks".
"Background: I wasnt thinking straight that day, and thought they said "Do you want a bag"
That's. How. Twins. Work?
"Her: the twins are 3 years old"
"Me: Both of them?"
"Oh no this unearthed a memory i had buried from kindergarten lmao"
"We had a set of twins in our classroom and once on their birthday party I said "your brother got such a cool party, i hope yours is nice like this too" to one of them and he was like "yeah, this one"
"4 year old me was not a very bright kid"
That's. How. Death. Works...
"Watching the documentary 'The Last Dance' when a Kobe interview pops up -"
"Me: "Wow, they must have filmed this before Kobe died."
"My wife: "Yeah, obviously…."
The cringe comes out of nowhere, and you're not even sure how you were able to ask something so incredibly stupid, but here you are. Lounging in the stupid air.
You Should Have Asked What "Nothing" Tastes Like Next
"In my head I was wondering what one pound of water would look like in terms of volume. What I said out loud however was "How much does a pound of water weigh?"
Keep Up With Me
"A couple of months ago, I got up and drove to work as usual. Later, my girlfriend texted me from home to ask me if she had left her sunglasses in my car. I told her I wasn't sure, but she could grab my spare key and go check."
"In my car."
"Which I had driven to work."
Black Is White, White Is Black
"I don't understand why people place bets on who wins, why not just place bets on who loses?"
"Yeah took me a minute to register what I said..."
And then there's these stories, where the person is probably better off cutting off any human contact henceforth going forward. These are rough to get through, folks.
Should Probably Have A Chat With HR After This
"I was about 4 months into my current job, feeling confident being fresh off the contract-to-hire period, now moved into a coveted full time role. While walking back to my office from the morning kanban I was stopped by my boss, head peeking out of the office:"
"Boss: "Hey TheMediator, do you have a sec?"
"Me: "For you, I've got lots of secs!"
"Boss: wide-eyes, mouth dropped"
"If you're curious why this was incredibly stupid/embarrassing, try saying the phrase "lots of secs" out loud. Preferably, not to your boss though."
You Don't Need College Anymore. Go Home. Bury Your Head In The Sand.
"In my freshman year of college I was dorming next door to a couple cute girls. About a week into the first semester one girl walked from the coed showers to her dorm room in her towel still wet. We were both unlocking our doors to get in our rooms when she looks at me and says…"
"I know I look stunning…(sarcastically)"
"To which I replied, "don't flatter yourself."
"I had to slid a note under her door explaining I was tongue tied as she was beautiful and I meant to say "don't be hard on yourself, you look great." (Or something to that nature). We became good friends."
It's In The Descriptor?
"Chatting to a homeless guy on the street and he told me he was feeling unwell. I told him he should be at home, resting."
"It's been 20 years and the memory of it still brings me out in a cold sweat."
Oh Good Lord...
"Asked my friend how his mom was doing at his moms funeral."
"Jesus Christ this is the worst one on this thread. What was his response?"
"He looked at me and then the casket and kind of smirked. I awkwardly started to try and explain and just said "I'm an idiot. You know I love you. Talk to you in a bit." He makes fun of me now and I can't stop laughing. It's a positive painful memory."
Own up to your mistakes. You'll garner more respect by acknowledging the awkward things you say, however, it's perfectly fine to laugh about it in the moment. That's probably the easiest way to escape the deep, deep shame.
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The advice "fake it til you make it," though often said with at least a hint of sarcasm, does carry quite a bit of wisdom.
By simply putting one foot in front of the other, weathering the chaos of not knowing what's happening as you learn as fast as possible, we can find ourselves further than we expected.
Once we're there, reaping the fruits of all our "faking," we somehow begin to take on a new identity in people's eyes They assume we've always been in control and known what was going on. They defer to us for advice.
But that couldn't be further from the truth. So we keep on faking it.
Redditor espectro11 asked:
"What's your 'I don't know, I didn't think I'd get this far' moment?"
Many Redditors discussed their experiences navigating the intimidating environment of job applications, interviews, and offers.
Oh Right, Getting Paid
"I gave my resume to fancy private school (I'm a teacher, but new to the field) and I didn't expect a call back. But they called me today to ask my expected salary and I said 'I don't know what the average is. Let me Google it.' "
"Ya girl was not prepared."
"When I went for a walk-in interview looking like crap and they hired me on the spot. I get they were hiring for a new store, but they up and said 'if you want the job it's yours, when can you start?' "
"Deada** didn't think I'd make it that far."
Outside the Box
"Years ago I was applying to a bunch of copywriting jobs and feeling frustrated because I wasnt hearing back from any of the places I was applying to."
"It was especially frustrating because I was putting in all this time on cover letters and I felt like nobody was even reading them, so I said, 'Fu** it, I'm gonna write one that is more me.' I thought it was a dumb idea and never imagined that it would work, but somehow it did."
"I applied with this cover letter and the subject line "Copywriter: Will Work for Beer" to a job that I was very underqualified for. It managed to catch the eye of the headhunter for the ad agency and was enough to get me an interview. Shortly after that I was hired and ended up working there for a few years, but I remember thinking on my first day, 'I can't believe that actually worked.' "
Just Not the Right Fit
"An interview at Google. The 20 years younger than me was describing the peer review system."
"I responded with 'Jesus, that sounds awful.' "
"I did not get the job."
Others also shared experiences that centered on their working lives. But these stories weren't about being hired or interviewed.
These were accounts of long-developing success stories that they never would have predicted.
A Winding Road
"My entire legal career"
"I have four degrees and a 10 year career in commerical litigation. I just wrapped up a $200mil trusts lawsuit."
"I started at uni doing theatre and stand up comedy. I have no fu**ing idea where I turned to get here."
"Started at a very small company doing sales straight out of college. I went about messaging big corporate players (who obviously would never do business with us since our size) and was laughed at by my new colleagues for even trying."
"2 weeks later My boss was asking me what we (a team of 6) should say on the conference call with Toshiba Buyers."
Putting Fires Out
"Me at work. I feel like every issue that comes up has me unprepared. But I am always praised for my good work."
"So, I assume I have imposter syndrome and keep doing what I am doing."
So next time you find yourself ruling a possibility out completely, maybe take just a few seconds to imagine it actually occurred and prepare.
You just never know.
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I'm going to be perfectly honest––I'm a city boy. I'm not a huge fan of hiking or camping. I happen to be a huge fan of running water. Have you heard of it? It's great. Highly recommended.
I've also, on a more humorous note, watched far too many horror films over the years and don't particularly like idea of running off into the woods only to piss off some demon that was perfectly fine until I arrived. I also have immense respect for our friendly neighborhood serial killers and demonstrate this regularly by staying out of their territory.
Those who love the great outdoors had plenty to share after Redditor Your_Normal_Loser asked the online community, "
Hikers of Reddit, what is the weirdest or creepiest thing you've come across while hiking?"
"The only reason..."
"When we were exploring the Australian Outback as university students, my friend and I found an old, tightly wrapped plastic bag with five or six damaged wallets along shrubbery at the base of a cliff.
The only reason we opened it up was because we were so remote - hundreds of kilometres from any town or tourist attraction - that it was strange to see garbage out there. All the cards were in female names and birthdates placed them in their late teens to early 20s. Some lived in the Northern Territory but one was in Sydney and another from Queensland. At the time we figured rock climbers must have stored their valuables in the bag and then lost track of it. I'll never forget the strange look the police officer gave us when we handed them in."
You see... this is why I wouldn't go mess around in the Australian Outback.
I also may or may not have watched Wolf Creek one too many times.
"A recliner on a small hill with a hole dug out in the middle and water bottles all over the place."
"A trashed campsite..."
"A trashed campsite complete with the tent cut open...
...do you report these things, or what?"
Or maybe not... you might want to turn back.
"The walls were completely plastered..."
"I was walking in a thick forest and came across an opening. In the center there was a shack made of lumber, with a bench built into it that was slightly leaned back.
The walls were completely plastered in porn."
Well... that's one way to get off.
"The man stopped talking..."
"I was backpacking with a few friends. A few days in the middle of nowhere, a man approached our camp as we were cooking dinner to say hi. We talked about our routes for a few minutes. Out of nowhere, he told us that he had had a vasectomy in his 30s after his 2nd child. Then somehow his wife had gotten pregnant with his 3rd child. He didn't believe this was possible, so he demanded a DNA test to see if he was actually the father. He was. Still, he explained that he had his doubts and thought that his wife must have fixed the DNA test.
My friends and I were in our 20s and had no idea why this guy was telling us this. We all just nodded and smiled.
The man stopped talking and then just walked away into the night."
"I stepped in..."
"I stepped in and fell over a cow carcass on a night hike. It was a bright moonlit night but I didn't see it in the shadows. Thankfully it was mostly dry."
"We still have no idea..."
"I was in the woods with three friends at night. A friend's house was nearby and I was getting hungry so I went inside to find some food. Another friend came inside with me. Two friends were still outside.
Later on, one of the two who outside came in and sees the indoor friend on the couch next to me. They panic and immediately run back outside.
I poke my head out the door asking what's going on, only to hear them yell as loudly as they can, "THAT'S NOT KEVIN"
Everyone comes inside and calms down a bit, and the story comes out. They thought the friend who was indoors with me (Kevin) had been outside with them this entire time. Why? Because in the darkness of the woods they saw a silhouette about the same height walking alongside them silently, then at some point it ran away and they were chasing it thinking Kevin was running off for some reason. The reason my friend yelled, "That's not Kevin" was to stop the last outdoor friend from chasing whoever was out there deeper into the woods.
We still have no idea who that was or why they didn't even speak."
This story sent a chill running down my spine.
Who was that?!
Perhaps figuring it out would be even scarier.
"Went hiking with my dad..."
"Went hiking with my dad one day over a ridge. A girl from the group in front of us tripped and slid down one side and was just able to hold on to the tiniest branch from the only tree around. Had she slid down all the way she certainly would be dead or massively injured!"
"I was trying to make my way across..."
"I was hiking in Washington sometime in December. I was trying to make my way across a river but the bridge was out. I was walking along the shore looking for a shallow spot but couldn't find one. I saw some footprints leading down the bank, my thought was that someone was trying to do what I was doing and decided to track the prints to see if they crossed. It was not easy but I followed the prints for about a mile. As I approached what looked like a crossing I heard a loud BANG like a stick hitting a tree. I froze for a few seconds and heard no other noises. I just slowly back up keeping my eyes on the other side of the river. Could not shake the feeling that I was being watched. Got the hell out of there quick as I could."
There are few feelings creepier than the feeling of being watched. It makes you feel like you've been violated in some way.
Thankfully you got out of there!
"I thought it was a magical, beautiful moment..."
"I was hiking with some friends, and I saw a cluster of butterflies on the ground. I thought it was a magical, beautiful moment until I realized they were congregating on a pool of blood. It turns out that someone had been hiking on the bluffs above earlier that day, and had fallen off and died."
Sooo... still want to go hiking or camping? None of this changed your mind? None of it?
It was nice knowing you. I'll stick with my running water.
Have some creepy stories of your own? Feel free to tell us about them in the comments below!
Have some experiences of your own? Have you also survived the hospitality industry? Feel free to tell us about it in the comments below!
Time is of the essence. And time is not definable. Those are lessons we learn as we get older; as times passes and fluctuates in front of us.
Time is always fleeting yet always catches up to us. I find myself shocked when I wake up on certain days and realize I'm a particular age of my parent that sticks out for me.
Like, how did that happen? I guess I should just be thankful I'm still here to witness it all.
Redditor u/TW1103 wanted to discuss the meaning... of time and all of its affects by asking:
What fact really puts the scale of time into an insane perspective?
Ok, who is watching the clock? Those seconds aren't going to count themselves. The only way to understand time is to be its witness. Although that can get depressing. Let's focus on the light and cool.
History...Calculate Figure It Out GIF by OriginalsGiphy
"If you are an 80-year-old American, you have lived through approximately 1/3 of our nation's entire history."
"The 80s were 40 years ago."
"This is what messes me up because I was born in 82 and graduated high school in 2000 so for some reason my brain is stuck on the 80's being twenty years ago. The 70's thirty years ago etc etc. I have to stop and realize sometimes that my concept of how long ago things happened is way off."
Time goes by...
"We observe that light travels at 186,000 miles a second, but given the vast size of the observable universe, that's a snail's pace. But from the point of view of a particle of light, time doesn't even exist."
"Time slows down as you approach the speed of light, and theoretically stops completely when you reach the speed of light."
Years Gone By...
"MLK Jr. and Anne Frank were born in the same year."
"Betty White was born in 1922. Automatically pre-sliced packaged bread loaves became commercially available in 1928. Betty White is six years older than sliced bread."
Long Live the Queen!queen elizabeth images GIFGiphy
"The queen and Marilyn Monroe would've been the same age."
I swear Liz is going to outlive dirt. Wait, I believe she already has. Well she won't be alone, she'll have Betty White. At least she better have Betty. Time is nothing without Queen Betty.
TV TimeSeason 2 Omg GIF by Paramount+Giphy
"Happy Days was a TV show made in the 1970s-80s about teenagers in the 1950s. Similarly, That 70s Show was made in the 90s-00s about teenagers in the 70s. If a similar show were to be made today, it would be about teenagers in the 2000s."
"If a T-Rex imagined a creature as ancient as the T-Rex is to us, it would be a Stegosaurus. If that Stegosaurus imagined a creature as ancient as the Stegosaurus is to us, it would be a Crocodile. If that Crocodile imagined a creature as ancient as that Crocodile is to us, it would be a Shark."
On the Clock
"On a twenty four hour clock the amount of time that humans have been on the earth would total around five seconds."
"How about this one: If Homo Habilus first appeared at midnight, 24 hours ago, that means the first Homo Sapiens appeared at 9:25 PM, or about 2 and a half hours ago. The first human civilization, in lower Mesopotamia, appeared at 11:57 PM, or about 3 minutes ago."
"The Western Roman Empire fell at 11:59 PM, or 1 minute ago. Everything that has happened since - the Crusades, the Plague, the discovery of the New World, the world wars, all of it - has happened in the last minute of human existence."
And that's just OUR Sun...
"The span of our lives are so insignificantly small that our Sun will last another 5 billion years. That's 9 zeros people. Our eldest live to around 100 in the best places. That's 50,000,000 (50 million) times longer than any person can reasonably expect to live. And that's just OUR Sun. The universe as a whole has probably existed for magnitudes longer than that already and will continue to exist until the end of time as we know it."
Tell Me a Storywilliam shakespeare GIF by will herringGiphy
"We know what a good storyteller Shakespeare was but there were Greek playwrights who wrote shows nearly 2,000 years earlier that are pretty good, too."
I hate time. Only because I'm petty and irritated of the amount I squandered. That's neither here nor there though. Time marches on and continues to amaze. I'll keep watching.
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