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People Divulge The Real Reason They Drifted Apart From Their Ex-Best Friend

Reddit user Macburgh asked: 'What pushed you away from your ex-best friend?'

The concept of a life-long friend or "Best Friends Forever" is beautiful, but few of us realize just how difficult it is to make a friendship last that long.

As people grow and change over time, often their friendship doesn't have the flexibility it needs to endure those changes.

And like the many complexities of a friendship, there are many reasons why the friendship may eventually fail.

Redditor Macburgh asked:

"What pushed you away from your ex-best friend?"

The Transactional Friendship

"When I realized that the only time she ever got in touch with me was because she wanted something from me."

- Tinlizzie2

"I did this too. I 100% thought of him as my best friend, but then, when I was going through some s**t (for months), he couldn't be bothered to return my calls."

"It made me realize the relationship had always been all about him. So I dropped him."

"And f**k me, because I still grieve the loss of my best friend."

- So-I-Had-This-Idea

An Outside Perspective

"I got a new friend and hung out together with them a few times."

"Then my new friend mentioned how my old friend treated me like absolute s**t and I didn't seem to notice."

"As soon as my new friend mentioned it, that's all I could see."

- dankest-dookie

The Absolute Energy Suck

"When I realized that they just brought negative energy and drama with them everywhere."

"Something or someone always had to be wrong and they desperately needed to be the center of everyone’s attention."

"It just became grating and I found myself less happy around them. So I had to remove myself from the friendship."

- tmw1102

The Enabling Parent

"My ex-best friend and I were both about 33 at the time."

"I met her daughter (12) for the very first time, and she was a complete b***h to me the entire lunch, saying things like, 'Wow, you’re really ugly,' and 'That’s so stupid,' after I would say something."

"Also, 'Your hair looks like a witch,' 'Your clothes are gross,' etc."

"And she said everything loud enough that other tables kept looking over."

"My ex-best friend never once scolded her or even told her to stop. Instead, she’d sheepishly laugh and say, 'She’s just a little headstrong,' and 'Don’t pay attention, she’s always difficult with new people,' and 'She doesn’t really mean it.'"

"I did make a couple of attempts to make her stop, but I wasn’t about to scold a child I didn’t really know, in front of her actual parent. I’d say things like, 'Geez, what a cruel thing to say,' or 'It’s odd that you’re being so mean for no reason,' but my ex-friend ever even added anything to that."

"A couple of years later, I was organizing a formal, black-tie party, and I sent her an invite with a plus-one invitation."

"She asked if she could bring her daughter since it was her custody weekend to have her, and I. SAID. NO."

"The event was child-free, at an upscale wine bar that was reserved for the private party."

"My ex-best friend begged and pleaded with me to make an exception, she was older now, blah blah."

"I held firm and said this was an important event to me, I would have professional peers from my industry there, and based on a) her daughter’s behavior two years prior and b) her lack of discipline, I didn’t feel confident that nothing similar would happen."

"I could just picture her insulting my dress, the food, the music, the location… and as this was an unofficial marketing event, I could NOT allow that."

"She exploded. She said I was a pretentious b***h, and that I was choosing being fake over being her friend. There were some other choice words."

"It was kind of the first time she’d ever spoken to me like that in our entire friendship. And of course, her daughter was just joking, she really did like me. Yeah right."

"She immediately blocked me on everything. This was in 2016. We haven’t spoken since."

- mnbvcxz1052

The Third Wheel

"We were best friends for about ten years. I finally distanced myself because I couldn’t handle her relationship. It was very unhealthy, in my opinion."

"She literally couldn’t do anything alone; if she showered, he showered. She went to work, and he went and hung out there for her shift. This was true of EVERYTHING."

"It got to the point of me telling her that he wasn’t invited so he would stop showing up with her to our hangouts."

"And at that point, she would either refuse to come, cancel at the last minute, or she would come and rush through whatever we had planned so she could meet him outside, where he would loiter, waiting for her to finish hanging out with me. Or she would come, and he would 'show up' about ten minutes later and act like it’s a coincidence that we’re at the same place and then join us. Very annoying."

"He also never had a job. And it was not that he was unemployed and looking, but he was unemployed and planning to stay unemployed and let my friend work for their household money. When we managed to get some time alone, she constantly complained about their lack of money and how she wanted him to work and stop smothering her."

"I encouraged her to either talk to him and work it out or dump him. She promised to talk to him but never did. And dumping him was not an option according to her because she couldn’t be alone."

"I just couldn’t watch her disrespect herself anymore when the solution was so simple."

"We still have mutual friends so I know they are still together, about 13 years now. They have two kids. He still doesn’t work but he’s not a SAHD either. From what I’ve been told, now that she’s not in retail anymore and he can’t loiter inside, so he sits in their car outside her office every day."

"And from what I’ve heard, that togetherness extends to parenting. If the kids are sick or have a dentist appointment or something, the boyfriend doesn’t take them. Ex-BFF takes time off work so they can do it together."

- Steffie25

Complaints Only

"She only wanted to talk to me about her relationship problems with her crazy boyfriend. My advice to her fell on deaf ears and I couldn’t handle hearing about how poorly he treated her over and over."

- mrsyandy

A New Perspective

"I got therapy."

- Protomorfid

"It’s super, super common that as you heal you find yourself moving on from relationships that no longer serve you because they were premised in your previous unhealthy behavior and belief systems. I’m experiencing this currently."

- 06Gleity06

The Convenient Friend

"She ignored me whenever we had other people around, but when she didn't have anyone else to hang out with, she would text me, and she would get mad and try to make me feel bad if I couldn't hang out with her."

- ParticularTomato5537

The Boundary Crosser

"I realized I’m a people pleaser and started setting boundaries. They apparently didn't like that, and the rest sorted itself out…"

- PJpittie

The Overly-Critical Friend

"My ex-best friend left me when I got engaged to my now husband. We were both raised Mormon and were not getting married in the temple. Big deal in the Mormon church."

"She thought we should 'wait until we were worthy' and that we were only getting married to have sex."

"I walked away from that friendship. My husband and I have been together 11 years now, are no longer Mormon, and, for the record, got married because we love each other."

- imaginarybat567

Partners Before Friends

"He got a girlfriend and doesn't need me anymore. His personality has changed a lot, and I can't recognize him anymore. Also, he started ghosting me."

"I miss my best and only friend."

- WaldiIO

Lack of Reciprocation

"I realized how many times I had to ask her to hang out and make plans and remake them when she canceled last minute before we'd actually hang out."

"And every time we did, she was going through a crisis and needed to cry and vent. I was happy to listen and help."

"But the TWO times in our whole friendship I asked for help, she couldn't make the time or just flat out ignored my texts."

"I realized she'd never once gone out of her way for me for anything. I stopped asking to hang out, and she still hasn't. Guess that's that."

- eatsmyfridge

The Friend with Back-handed Compliments

"My sister and I were friends with her together."

"She was never a great friend to me, she was closer to my sister. They’re the same age (a year younger than me), went to school together, and knew each other longer. She always treated me at the third wheel, but I just wanted to fit in with my gorgeous sister and her gorgeous friend."

"I think at first we both had blinders on to her. She was always giving half compliments or very backhand compliments. She ALWAYS copied everything my sister did or wanted to do. It got to the point where she was constantly putting my sister down, putting her relationship down, making snide comments about how she looked (my sister is a f**king goddess and I am not just saying that), and it seemed like my sister just didn’t notice."

"One particular weekend, my sister and I were in town and staying with her and I had had enough by the second night. My sister noticed my mood change and asked what was up. I asked her if she even realized what this person was doing. She said she hadn’t noticed. But then she thought about it and she realized I was right. I just told my sister she deserves way better than that."

"I distanced myself after that weekend, but she and my sister remained friends for a while longer. They finally had a falling out a couple of years ago where my sister finally stood up for herself and stopped putting up with this girl’s bulls**t."

"I know that we are both better off for it. This person is the most toxic person I’ve ever met in my life."

- schmidt_onyourface

So Quick to Leave

"We had a group of four of us that were really close. The guy that has introduced us all to each other started dating a girl a decade younger than him."

"I knew her from school and warned him she was a pathological liar, but he decided I was the liar and jealous and turned the other two against me. They all stopped talking to me."

"Six months later, sure enough, they realized she was full of s**t and tried making amends with me, but I couldn’t get over how quickly and easily they all turned on me. So I just did my own thing. F**k them."

- blah_shelby

The Inactive Listener

"We're not ex-friends, but I wouldn't consider him the best anymore, even having known him for over 20 years."

"He talks just to talk and will only respond to anything else with 'Yeah' or 'Uh-huh' until he has the chance to talk again. He will hijack conversations entirely, and before I know it, he's talking about himself again."

"Also, he only ever seems to tell stories of our time in high school and college, and only the same four or five over and over."

"At first, I thought it was a social thing, but it happens every time without fail regardless of where we are. It's incredibly frustrating to be talking to a group of people and being interrupted."

- medieval_saucery

There are all kinds of reasons that a friendship might come apart, and these make sense as to why these friendships were not able to lost.

As much as we might love them, sometimes the best thing we can do is to let our best friends go.

People Reveal The Weirdest Thing About Themselves

Reddit user Isitjustmedownhere asked: 'Give an example; how weird are you really?'

Let's get one thing straight: no one is normal. We're all weird in our own ways, and that is actually normal.

Of course, that doesn't mean we don't all have that one strange trait or quirk that outweighs all the other weirdness we possess.

For me, it's the fact that I'm almost 30 years old, and I still have an imaginary friend. Her name is Sarah, she has red hair and green eyes, and I strongly believe that, since I lived in India when I created her and there were no actual people with red hair around, she was based on Daphne Blake from Scooby-Doo.

I also didn't know the name Sarah when I created her, so that came later. I know she's not really there, hence the term 'imaginary friend,' but she's kind of always been around. We all have conversations in our heads; mine are with Sarah. She keeps me on task and efficient.

My mom thinks I'm crazy that I still have an imaginary friend, and writing about her like this makes me think I may actually be crazy, but I don't mind. As I said, we're all weird, and we all have that one trait that outweighs all the other weirdness.

Redditors know this all too well and are eager to share their weird traits.

It all started when Redditor Isitjustmedownhere asked:

"Give an example; how weird are you really?"

Monsters Under My Bed

"My bed doesn't touch any wall."

"Edit: I guess i should clarify im not rich."

– Practical_Eye_3600

"Gosh the monsters can get you from any angle then."

– bikergirlr7

"At first I thought this was a flex on how big your bedroom is, but then I realized you're just a psycho 😁"

– zenOFiniquity8

Can You See Why?

"I bought one of those super-powerful fans to dry a basement carpet. Afterwards, I realized that it can point straight up and that it would be amazing to use on myself post-shower. Now I squeegee my body with my hands, step out of the shower and get blasted by a wide jet of room-temp air. I barely use my towel at all. Wife thinks I'm weird."

– KingBooRadley


"In 1990 when I was 8 years old and bored on a field trip, I saw a black Oldsmobile Cutlass driving down the street on a hot day to where you could see that mirage like distortion from the heat on the road. I took a “snapshot” by blinking my eyes and told myself “I wonder how long I can remember this image” ….well."

– AquamarineCheetah

"Even before smartphones, I always take "snapshots" by blinking my eyes hoping I'll remember every detail so I can draw it when I get home. Unfortunately, I may have taken so much snapshots that I can no longer remember every detail I want to draw."

"Makes me think my "memory is full.""

– Reasonable-Pirate902

Same, Same

"I have eaten the same lunch every day for the past 4 years and I'm not bored yet."

– OhhGoood

"How f**king big was this lunch when you started?"

– notmyrealnam3

Not Sure Who Was Weirder

"Had a line cook that worked for us for 6 months never said much. My sous chef once told him with no context, "Baw wit da baw daw bang daw bang diggy diggy." The guy smiled, left, and never came back."

– Frostygrunt


"I pace around my house for hours listening to music imagining that I have done all the things I simply lack the brain capacity to do, or in some really bizarre scenarios, I can really get immersed in these imaginations sometimes I don't know if this is some form of schizophrenia or what."

– RandomSharinganUser

"I do the same exact thing, sometimes for hours. When I was young it would be a ridiculous amount of time and many years later it’s sort of trickled off into almost nothing (almost). It’s weird but I just thought it’s how my brain processes sh*t."

– Kolkeia

If Only

"Even as an adult I still think that if you are in a car that goes over a cliff; and right as you are about to hit the ground if you jump up you can avoid the damage and will land safely. I know I'm wrong. You shut up. I'm not crying."

– ShotCompetition2593

Pet Food

"As a kid I would snack on my dog's Milkbones."

– drummerskillit

"Haha, I have a clear memory of myself doing this as well. I was around 3 y/o. Needless to say no one was supervising me."

– Isitjustmedownhere

"When I was younger, one of my responsibilities was to feed the pet fish every day. Instead, I would hide under the futon in the spare bedroom and eat the fish food."

– -GateKeep-

My Favorite Subject

"I'm autistic and have always had a thing for insects. My neurotypical best friend and I used to hang out at this local bar to talk to girls, back in the late 90s. One time he claimed that my tendency to circle conversations back to insects was hurting my game. The next time we went to that bar (with a few other friends), he turned and said sternly "No talking about bugs. Or space, or statistics or other bullsh*t but mainly no bugs." I felt like he was losing his mind over nothing."

"It was summer, the bar had its windows open. Our group hit it off with a group of young ladies, We were all chatting and having a good time. I was talking to one of these girls, my buddy was behind her facing away from me talking to a few other people."

"A cloudless sulphur flies in and lands on little thing that holds coasters."

"Cue Jordan Peele sweating gif."

"The girl notices my tension, and asks if I am looking at the leaf. "Actually, that's a lepidoptera called..." I looked at the back of my friend's head, he wasn't looking, "I mean a butterfly..." I poked it and it spread its wings the girl says "oh that's a BUG?!" and I still remember my friend turning around slowly to look at me with chastisement. The ONE thing he told me not to do."

"I was 21, and was completely not aware that I already had a rep for being an oddball. It got worse from there."

– Phormicidae

*Teeth Chatter*

"I bite ice cream sometimes."


"That's how I am with popsicles. My wife shudders every single time."


Never Speak Of This

"I put ice in my milk."


"You should keep that kind of thing to yourself. Even when asked."

– We-R-Doomed

"There's some disturbing sh*t in this thread, but this one takes the cake."

– RatonaMuffin

More Than Super Hearing

"I can hear the television while it's on mute."

– Tira13e

"What does it say to you, child?"

– Mama_Skip


"I put mustard on my omelettes."

– Deleted User


– NotCrustOr-filling

Evened Up

"Whenever I say a word and feel like I used a half of my mouth more than the other half, I have to even it out by saying the word again using the other half of my mouth more. If I don't do it correctly, that can go on forever until I feel it's ok."

"I do it silently so I don't creep people out."

– LesPaltaX

"That sounds like a symptom of OCD (I have it myself). Some people with OCD feel like certain actions have to be balanced (like counting or making sure physical movements are even). You should find a therapist who specializes in OCD, because they can help you."

– MoonlightKayla

I totally have the same need for things to be balanced! Guess I'm weird and a little OCD!

Close up face of a woman in bed, staring into the camera
Photo by Jen Theodore

Experiencing death is a fascinating and frightening idea.

Who doesn't want to know what is waiting for us on the other side?

But so many of us want to know and then come back and live a little longer.

It would be so great to be sure there is something else.

But the whole dying part is not that great, so we'll have to rely on other people's accounts.

Redditor AlaskaStiletto wanted to hear from everyone who has returned to life, so they asked:

"Redditors who have 'died' and come back to life, what did you see?"


Happy Good Vibes GIF by Major League SoccerGiphy

"My dad's heart stopped when he had a heart attack and he had to be brought back to life. He kept the paper copy of the heart monitor which shows he flatlined. He said he felt an overwhelming sensation of peace, like nothing he had felt before."



"I had surgical complications in 2010 that caused a great deal of blood loss. As a result, I had extremely low blood pressure and could barely stay awake. I remember feeling like I was surrounded by loved ones who had passed. They were in a circle around me and I knew they were there to guide me onwards. I told them I was not ready to go because my kids needed me and I came back."

"My nurse later said she was afraid she’d find me dead every time she came into the room."

"It took months, and blood transfusions, but I recovered."


Take Me Back

"Overwhelming peace and happiness. A bright airy and floating feeling. I live a very stressful life. Imagine finding out the person you have had a crush on reveals they have the same feelings for you and then you win the lotto later that day - that was the feeling I had."

"I never feared death afterward and am relieved when I hear of people dying after suffering from an illness."



The Light Minnie GIF by (G)I-DLEGiphy

"I had a heart surgery with near-death experience, for me at least (well the possibility that those effects are caused by morphine is also there) I just saw black and nothing else but it was warm and I had such inner peace, its weird as I sometimes still think about it and wish this feeling of being so light and free again."


This is why I hate surgery.

You just never know.



"More of a near-death experience. I was electrocuted. I felt like I was in a deep hole looking straight up in the sky. My life flashed before me. Felt sad for my family, but I had a deep sense of peace."



"Nursing in the ICU, we’ve had people try to die on us many times during the years, some successfully. One guy stood out to me. His heart stopped. We called a code, are working on him, and suddenly he comes to. We hadn’t vented him yet, so he was able to talk, and he started screaming, 'Don’t let them take me, don’t let them take me, they are coming,' he was scared and yelling."

"Then he yelled a little more, as we tried to calm him down, he screamed, 'No, No,' and gestured towards the end of the bed, and died again. We didn’t get him back. It was seriously creepy. We called his son to tell him the news, and the son said basically, 'Good, he was an SOB.'”



"My sister died and said it was extremely peaceful. She said it was very loud like a train station and lots of talking and she was stuck in this area that was like a curtain with lots of beautiful colors (colors that you don’t see in real life according to her) a man told her 'He was sorry, but she had to go back as it wasn’t her time.'"


"I had a really similar experience except I was in an endless garden with flowers that were colors I had never seen before. It was quiet and peaceful and a woman in a dress looked at me, shook her head, and just said 'Not yet.' As I was coming back, it was extremely loud, like everyone in the world was trying to talk all at once. It was all very disorienting but it changed my perspective on life!"


The Fog

"I was in a gray fog with a girl who looked a lot like a young version of my grandmother (who was still alive) but dressed like a pioneer in the 1800s she didn't say anything but kept pulling me towards an opening in the wall. I kept refusing to go because I was so tired."

"I finally got tired of her nagging and went and that's when I came to. I had bled out during a c-section and my heart could not beat without blood. They had to deliver the baby and sew up the bleeders. refill me with blood before they could restart my heart so, like, at least 12 minutes gone."


Through the Walls

"My spouse was dead for a couple of minutes one miserable night. She maintains that she saw nothing, but only heard people talking about her like through a wall. The only thing she remembers for absolute certain was begging an ER nurse that she didn't want to die."

"She's quite alive and well today."


Well let's all be happy to be alive.

It seems to be all we have.

Man's waist line
Santhosh Vaithiyanathan/Unsplash

Trying to lose weight is a struggle understood by many people regardless of size.

The goal of reaching a healthy weight may seem unattainable, but with diet and exercise, it can pay off through persistence and discipline.

Seeing the pounds gradually drop off can also be a great motivator and incentivize people to stay the course.

Those who've achieved their respective weight goals shared their experiences when Redditor apprenti8455 asked:

"People who lost a lot of weight, what surprises you the most now?"

Redditors didn't see these coming.

Shiver Me Timbers

"I’m always cold now!"

– Telrom_1

"I had a coworker lose over 130 pounds five or six years ago. I’ve never seen him without a jacket on since."

– r7ndom

"140 lbs lost here starting just before COVID, I feel like that little old lady that's always cold, damn this top comment was on point lmao."

– mr_remy

Drawing Concern

"I lost 100 pounds over a year and a half but since I’m old(70’s) it seems few people comment on it because (I think) they think I’m wasting away from some terminal illness."

– dee-fondy

"Congrats on the weight loss! It’s honestly a real accomplishment 🙂"

"Working in oncology, I can never comment on someone’s weight loss unless I specifically know it was on purpose, regardless of their age. I think it kind of ruffles feathers at times, but like I don’t want to congratulate someone for having cancer or something. It’s a weird place to be in."

– LizardofDeath

Unleashing Insults

"I remember when I lost the first big chunk of weight (around 50 lbs) it was like it gave some people license to talk sh*t about the 'old' me. Old coworkers, friends, made a lot of not just negative, but harsh comments about what I used to look like. One person I met after the big loss saw a picture of me prior and said, 'Wow, we wouldn’t even be friends!'”

"It wasn’t extremely common, but I was a little alarmed by some of the attention. My weight has been up and down since then, but every time I gain a little it gets me a little down thinking about those things people said."

– alanamablamaspama

Not Everything Goes After Losing Weight

"The loose skin is a bit unexpected."

– KeltarCentauri

"I haven’t experienced it myself, but surgery to remove skin takes a long time to recover. Longer than bariatric surgery and usually isn’t covered by insurance unless you have both."

– KatMagic1977

"It definitely does take a long time to recover. My Dad dropped a little over 200 pounds a few years back and decided to go through with skin removal surgery to deal with the excess. His procedure was extensive, as in he had skin taken from just about every part of his body excluding his head, and he went through hell for weeks in recovery, and he was bedridden for a lot of it."

– Jaew96

These Redditors shared their pleasantly surprising experiences.


"I can buy clothes in any store I want."

– WaySavvyD

"When I lost weight I was dying to go find cute, smaller clothes and I really struggled. As someone who had always been restricted to one or two stores that catered to plus-sized clothing, a full mall of shops with items in my size was daunting. Too many options and not enough knowledge of brands that were good vs cheap. I usually went home pretty frustrated."

– ganache98012

No More Symptoms

"Lost about 80 pounds in the past year and a half, biggest thing that I’ve noticed that I haven’t seen mentioned on here yet is my acid reflux and heartburn are basically gone. I used to be popping tums every couple hours and now they just sit in the medicine cabinet collecting dust."

– colleennicole93

Expanding Capabilities

"I'm all for not judging people by their appearance and I recognise that there are unhealthy, unachievable beauty standards, but one thing that is undeniable is that I can just do stuff now. Just stamina and flexibility alone are worth it, appearance is tertiary at best."

– Ramblonius

People Change Their Tune

"How much nicer people are to you."

"My feet weren't 'wide' they were 'fat.'"

– LiZZygsu

"Have to agree. Lost 220 lbs, people make eye contact and hold open doors and stuff"

"And on the foot thing, I also lost a full shoe size numerically and also wear regular width now 😅"

– awholedamngarden

It's gonna take some getting used to.

Bones Everywhere

"Having bones. Collarbones, wrist bones, knee bones, hip bones, ribs. I have so many bones sticking out everywhere and it’s weird as hell."

– Princess-Pancake-97

"I noticed the shadow of my ribs the other day and it threw me, there’s a whole skeleton in here."

– bekastrange

Knee Pillow

"Right?! And they’re so … pointy! Now I get why people sleep with pillows between their legs - the knee bones laying on top of each other (side sleeper here) is weird and jarring."

– snic2030

"I lost only 40 pounds within the last year or so. I’m struggling to relate to most of these comments as I feel like I just 'slimmed down' rather than dropped a ton. But wow, the pillow between the knees at night. YES! I can relate to this. I think a lot of my weight was in my thighs. I never needed to do this up until recently."

– Strongbad23

More Mobility

"I’ve lost 100 lbs since 2020. It’s a collection of little things that surprise me. For at least 10 years I couldn’t put on socks, or tie my shoes. I couldn’t bend over and pick something up. I couldn’t climb a ladder to fix something. Simple things like that I can do now that fascinate me."

"Edit: Some additional little things are sitting in a chair with arms, sitting in a booth in a restaurant, being able to shop in a normal store AND not needing to buy the biggest size there, being able to easily wipe my butt, and looking down and being able to see my penis."

– dma1965

People making significant changes, whether for mental or physical health, can surely find a newfound perspective on life.

But they can also discover different issues they never saw coming.

That being said, overcoming any challenge in life is laudable, especially if it leads to gaining confidence and ditching insecurities.