We've been living in interesting times. No one can predict what the outcome of this pandemic is, except for the people who say if we all wear masks and avoid people and stay home it will all be over a lot sooner. However, everyone's experiences living through COVID-19 are different since some of us are still working, some of us are working from home, and some of us are stuck there. We're all going through something, that's the thing we all share.
Reddit user, u/Aim_Hi, wanted to hear about how you're doing when they asked:
A Calm Mixture Of Chaosfrustrated homer simpson GIF Giphy
I'm struggling to get out of bed. Not really sad, not angry, not frustrated....a calm mixture of all that is making me hate the day. I'm a medical worker by the way. This year has been hell and I feel like I've aged 10 years and I'm only 22. I'm scared of going to nursing school, I'm scared of working at my job bc we have covid positive people, I'm not allowed to see my mom or my niece. I'm having a hard time and I can't/don't want to get out of bed.
Disconnected From Everything
Not so good. Was in between projects at work a few weeks ago and since I haven't been able to find enough focus to seek/start anything work and maintain effort. Just feel floaty and super disconnected. No idea how to snap out of it and get back into the mindset of focused work.
Finding The Joy In Everything
I'm actually the happiest I've ever been. Not really sure why. I was just in the car listening to music and I had an epiphany. I'm being paid to do what I love, I'm watching a cool tv show, and I am going camping this weekend. I do miss my friends, but I'm still happy.
A Slow Fall
Very slowly descending into insanity. Started college classes, mom is hooked up to an O2 machine and can't do much, and in a family of 4, I have to do the most for her. My dad works and my brother literally f-cking screams at anyone when he's asked to do anything. Being in charge of her, the house, and my dogs by myself for a week for the first time ever kind of put a strain on me more than normal.
Sometimes, We Can't Control Anything
I've become more accepting that the world is just screwed up and I have no control over it
I like to see myself as a spectator of a very interesting time in history
When The Internet Is Your Safe Space
Horrible. I can't spend a minute alone without my mind tormenting me. I feel like a piece of trash. And I can only tell Reddit I guess
Always There. Always Watching.
I'm sure the Germans have a word for this, but I don't know it.
I'm feeling that. Like in this moment things are okay, but there's this huge looming uncertainty staring over my shoulder at all times. Sure, I'm making do, but will I ever truly thrive again?
When You're Unable To Move Forward
I just got another rejection email regarding a potential job. The only thing keeping me from crying is that I am currently sitting in the same room as my parents. I have been unemployed for the past 8 months and don't qualify for unemployment. After all of the things I have done in my life in terms of jobs and education, it feels like none of it means a damn thing. I feel like a waste of space and completely useless and I don't know what else to do to get a job. Either I'm over qualified or I'm under qualified and there is no in between. I hate this.
I'll probably be in a better head space tomorrow, but right now it sucks.
Clowns To The Left Of Me. Jokers To The Right.
I don't want to live and I don't want to die. What a way to exist.
Are you me? I feel the same. Like everything in my life has led me to this state of being stuck and I don't want to be here but I don't want to not be here.
Moving On Past Society And...
Honestly? Better than it was before the pandemic. Working from home has removed about 2/3 of my stressors, I'm living with my best friend and his cat, I'm mostly caught up on work so that stress has been reduced, and my job has restored full hours and benefits so I'm set financially.
If I didn't have to sacrifice a third of my life to my capitalist overlords just for the right to food, clothing, and shelter, my depression could be cured, but it's a lot more manageable thanks to Covid. Which I sometimes feel guilty about because I know other people are suffering, but I'm thriving and I need to take my victories where I can get them because I don't really get a whole lot of those.
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I've actually been doing the best mentally than I ever have. I lost my mom 4 months ago, was very suicidal, moved in with my bf, got engaged, my brother tried to commit suicide a few months ago while being drunk got his kids taken away by child protective services (because hes an alcoholic same with his baby mamma), but most importantly got on meds that actually work for depression and anxiety.
I have struggled my whole like with both and I finally feel at peace with my emotions. I no longer obsess about the little things and I don't stay up at night forever or bug out as I call it.
Anyway thanks for listening.
If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).
To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/