Parenting is one of the most, special, unique, rewarding.... frightening, harrowing and arduous jobs any human can take on. There is no perfect way to do it correctly. Children can be... difficult, to say the least. So if you an discover ways to temper the stress and make the experience more enjoyable, why wouldn't you? Children are meant to be molded. Do as you must!
Redditor u/MacItaly wanted parents reading to fess up to some inventive ways they make parenting a bit simpler by asking.... Parents of Reddit: What's the best "Child Hack" you've figured out to make your life as a parent easier?
Say Excuse Me.
To get a newborn to burp:
Sit them on your knee, holding them under their armpits, and move their upper bodies in a circle several times. Like a reverse hula move I guess.
I learned it from a neonatal nurse, and it's almost infallible. So much faster and more reliable than regular burping. ohno_not_another_one
And We're Off!
When mine were younger, say, three or four, and it was close to time to stop playing at the park or in the pool, I always gave them plenty of warning using a concrete timeline that they could understand. Instead of saying "we're leaving soon" or "five more minutes," I would tell them something like "ok, let me see you jump in the pool. Seven more jumps and we're leaving." Sometimes the number was higher, but never less than five. Less than five was always met with "come on, just one more!!" Which usually wasn't allowed. Seven or more was always such a big number that they seemed to get their fill and were ready to go when it was time. sardineclub
My Wife.. the Genius. .
When my kids were little my wife worked at a health club and I would take the kids swimming in the evening. We'd always pack their PJs for their clothes they'd change into after swimming. That way, they got out of the pool, showered, and changed in to pajamas. They didn't always go to bed right when we got home, but they were always ready for bed when we got home.
It was my wife's idea. couchjitsu
Not IHOP!
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Denny's is where I teach them restaurant etiquette. Zero pressure & light on the wallet! magicmoonflower
A Few Basics....
Learn to say thank you and I'm sorry to them. It makes you closer and helps your relationship with them no matter what age.
Experiences are better than things. Waking up before them makes the day a lot easier.
Find a way to see them when you're driving. kjfrog
Snack Time.
If you have a hard time getting them to eat their vegetables give them before the dinner because that's when they are hungry and will eat almost anything, give them some carrots and cucumbers in a glass which is a great snack. marcusguthe
The Long Goal
The best advice I ever received as a parent... "It's all about the long game. Work really hard now to mold them into decent and intelligent little people and you can worry less as they turn into more responsible, respectful teens/young adults." It's a way to ensure quieter years later. CutLikeAPotato
The Color Scheme....
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Not a parent, but a daycare worker, and I learned this through reddit: If a child is having a meltdown, ask what color their shoes/shirts/pants/whatever clothing their wearing are. This distracts the child long enough to stop them in the midst of their meltdown because they haven't thought about what they're wearing. I used this trick twice on a kid today who was just having a terrible day. Calmed them right down. GayMaryPoppins
Reddit Knows...
Saw one on reddit where if you want to enjoy some time undisturbed tell your kids that you're taking a nap and when you wake up all of you are going to do chores together. They'll want to let you sleep as long as possible to avoid doing housework, so they'll leave you alone to actually nap or do other things like read. -eDgAR-
Use Your Words....
Be mindful of how you phrase questions
Example: Instead of "Do you want a hotdog for supper?" ask "What do you want on your hotdog?"
If your kid's a d**k, it won't matter. But it will help it most situations. DiceMorgansGhost
Where am I?
I had 3 kids very close in age. At one point I assigned them each a day of the week (they each got two and Sunday was the leftover) Whatever the question was, the answer was whose day is it. Who gets to go first? Who gets to ride in the front? Who has to take their bath first? I saved so many arguments with this. Governmentman43
Liar, Liar....
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I told my kid her ears turn red when she tells a lie, now she covers her ears when she lies. She is almost 7 and it still works. Eissbein
The List.
When your kid sees something they want like a toy or game and you can't/don't want to buy it tell them to "put it on the list."
If they're the type of kid that will follow through then you have a handy list for Christmas or birthdays. If not, then they'll forget about it.
Helps avoid arguments in the store because you aren't really saying no. Sarita_Maria
100% In!
If you threaten a consequence, follow through 100% of the time. Kids will test boundaries at every age, you just have to make it appropriate for their age group.
"If you throw sand again we are leaving the beach" - you must leave the beach
"If you don't clean your room no screen time tomorrow" - no screen time.
The key is to make the consequences not impact you to the point that you don't want to follow through since it will ruin your day too. A hard line to toe, but boy do boundaries and trust work. AnatasiaBeaverhausen
It's Bedtime!
Let your baby watch you fall asleep.
If it's their bedtime, don't play on your phone or read a book. They are following your lead. So be boring, close your eyes, and be still and quiet, and they will learn to, too. _LiterallyAnybody_
Glass Birds.
No a parent, but when I was a child my mom would hide her 4 glass birds (little sculptures she had) around the house. My sister and I had to look for them. We had to be very careful while looking so we didn't break them. If we broke one, we lost. If we left drawers/door/cabinets open, we lost. You would think that we could tie and each find two birds, but it never happened. We would go to mom when we gave up, and she would hide them all over again.
It wasn't until I was an adult did I realize that she never hid a fourth bird. But boy did we spend a looong time looking. 11never
Don't Drown.
If they are cranky, put them in water.
I have teenagers, this is still the method that I use. Even having them wash their hands or face does wonders.
To be fair, I do it with my husband too. So really, I guess it's just works for humans. sweetcarolinekisses
The Slumber Test.
My kids didn't understand the difference between different days. For example- we'll go to the store in 3 days. So my husband started calling it 'sleeps.' Now we say "we'll go to the store in 3 sleeps."
Also, offer a choice. Do you want to put your shoes on first or brush your hair first? It short circuits their tendency to fight you and makes them feel like they're making their own decisions, which they are. Make sure the options listed are ones you're okay with though. Thatswhatthatdoes
In the Nude.
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If you have a toddler who likes to get naked when they're supposed to be sleeping you can cut the feet off of footie pajamas and put them on them backwards (with the zipper on their back) and then they won't be able to get them off. Rromagar
Do You Hear What I Hear?
My wife and I came up with a short unique whistle that both kids knew meant come here to us. Works in malls, water parks or just to come in and clean up for dinner. Fellow parents were amazed by this. Teach them early. Biff_Bufflington
The old wives' tales.
They are the stories of legend.
I think we all need a big DEEP Google dive though.
Where did they originate?
WHO ARE THE OLD WIVES!
You don't hear about them as much anymore.
It's like science and logic are suddenly a thing.
But they sure are a good way to keep your kids and their behavior in line.
Redditor the_spring_goddess wanted to discuss the tall tales we've all been fed through life, so they asked:
"What is an old wives tale that people still believe?"
"Wait an hour to swim after eating."
What a crock!
So many summer hours wasted.
I want revenge for that one.
Say Nothing
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"An undercover cop has to tell you he's a cop if you ask him."
LonelyMail5115
"Pretty much most advice when it comes to cops are old wives tales. I’m not even a cop but most of the advice you hear is pretty off."
I_AM_AN_A**HOLE_AMA
Say Something
"That you have to wait 24 hours to report someone missing."
Severe_Airport1426
"I really think this one is important and should be the top regardless. As it’s a piece of advice that needs to be relearned and the only way to do that is through awareness."
crappycurtains
"This used to be true. I think they changed it after some guy named Brandon went missing back in the '80s or '70s. You used to have to wait 24 hours if the missing person was an adult because they had 'a right to be missing' and then everyone realized that was stupid and stopped doing it."
AlbinoShavedGorilla
Body Temps
"That drinking ice cold water after eating oily foods will solidify the oil and permanently remain in your body. I informed my coworker that if your body temperature ever reached that point, you’d have bigger problems than weight gain."
chriseo22
"Oh, I have a cousin who 100% believed this. One of those guys who believed every early 2000s internet rumor and old wives tale. One night I chugged a big glass of ice water after dinner and he started freaking out and saying my guts were gonna harden."
"I sarcastically told him to drive me to the hospital if that happened. Obviously, nothing happened and the next morning I said something like 'Thanks for being on standby in case my guts filled with hardened oil.' He just walked off muttering under his breath."
apocalypticradish
Arms Down
"When I was pregnant, I was told by young and old alike that I should NOT raise my arms above my head or exert myself in such a manner because it could cause cord strangulation to my unborn sons and daughters."
Fatmouse84
10 Years Actually
Unimpressed Uh Huh GIF by Brooklyn Nine-Nine
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"Chewing gum stays in your stomach for 7 years."
"I remember accidentally swallowing a piece of gum when I was a kid in like 1995 and just accepting my fate like welp, gonna have this in my stomach til high school I guess."
Gecko-911
I was so afraid to sallow my gum when I was young.
This tale is haunting.
High/Low
Hungry Debra Messing GIF by Will & Grace
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"You can tell the sex of the baby by how you carry."
LeastFormal9366
"Pregnancy certainly wins awards for the most old wives tales. So much absolute BS was repeated to us by everyone we talked to."
IllIIIlIllIlIIlIllI
The Cursed
"If you’re a woman and you wear opal jewelry but opal is not your birthstone (October), you’ll never be able to have children, or will be widowed, or just generally have bad luck or something. You can counteract this by having a diamond in the same piece of jewelry as the opal, though."
"I have a nice opal ring that my parents gave me years ago, and I’ve had other women give me this 'advice' unprompted more than once when I’ve worn it. I have absolutely no idea where it started, but I’m pretty sure this little chunk of silicate rock has no concept of what month I was born in, let alone of how my reproductive organs work."
SmoreOfBabylon
Stay In
"Going outside with wet hair will make you get pneumonia. Or an earache. Or maybe arthritis. Depends on which old wife you listen to."
"Jokes on them - I haven't blow-dried my hair in decades and usually leave the house with wet hair in the morning. On winter mornings, the tips of my hair get frozen. No ear infections or pneumonia or arthritis yet."
worldbound0514
Dreams and Facts
"You never make anyone up in your dreams you've seen everyone in your dreams somewhere else before and never make anyone up entirely."
"How would you possibly prove that to be true? My partner adamantly believes this and tells me this 'fact' whenever I have a dream about someone I've never met before."
mattshonestreddit
"My late wife used to tell me that before she met me she would have dreams of standing at an alter on her wedding day but could never see the guy's face, no matter how hard she tried. After meeting me the face was filled in with mine. Don't know if it's true but one of those things I like thinking of every now and then when I miss her."
Darthdemented
Cracked
Getting Ready Episode 2 GIF by The Office
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"Some people still believe cracking knuckles causes arthritis."
Choice-Grapefruit-44
"There's a doctor (Donald Unger) that cracked his knuckles a couple of times a day for 60 years, but only on one hand, just to prove it. Both hands remained exactly the same."
MacyTmcterry
I love my knuckles.
Do you have any tall tales to add to the list? Let us know in the comments below.
