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People Describe The Nastiest Thing They've Seen Come Out Of A Human Body

People Describe The Nastiest Thing They've Seen Come Out Of A Human Body
Elia Pellegrini on Unsplash

We are complicated vessels that emit all kinds of liquids and other substances depending on the circumstances–the usual suspects being blood when we're injured, sweat when we hit the gym and tears when our emotions get the better of us.

Of course, that's not all we expel from our bodies.

But anything beyond what is mentioned above is not something we should ever have to experience or envision.


Strangers online did not hold back when Redditor Silveo02 specifically asked:

"What is the nastiest thing you’ve ever seen come out of a human body?"

When your body fights off infection, it produces slimy nightmares.

Airborne Goo

"I was congested really bad one morning, I kept coughing to try to hack it out as one does, and right as I was getting out of my car at work, I sneezed something fierce, and a mass of bloody mucus and what I hope were boogers shot out of my nose."

"It was so large that my face felt empty, like I had lost part of my body. I wasn’t even disgusted, just intrigued and shocked, and relieved, but also stressed bc I thought I was missing some brain matter."

– InspectorGajina

Clearing The Pipes

"About ten years ago I had an awful sinus infection and sneezed out what I can only describe as a bloody tubular snot cast of my entire nostril. It felt glorious and I marveled at how something so large and disgusting could come out of my nose."

– MyTapewormToldMeSo

A Staph Infection

"My son got MRSA in his knee somehow when he was like 6. Draining the wound was vomitous."

– amalgaman

Swollen Upper Lip

"I had MRSA in my upper lip from chucking raw clams We'd use to farm in bags. The thing about raw clams is wasps and hornets just can't get enough of the soft meat and packs of 8 of them will fight you for a clam. Needless to say getting stung is one thing but getting stung by a wasp or hornet covered in raw clam is a infection nearly for sure."

"My upper lip swelled about 6 to 8 times or size and had to be juiced like a meaty toothpaste tube."

"I got the lucky end cuz my old step-dad would get stung dozens of times and had infections across the back of his whole head from em."

– accelis

Untreated dental issues can lead to seriously disgusting results.

Leave It To The Dentists

"Severe tooth abscess......whole jaw was swollen."

"Pushed my cheek hard until it popped and blood and puss filled about half my mouth. It hurt so badly that I got tunnel vision, started to black out, and almost vomited at the same time."

"'Do it yourself dentistry'.....don't do it kids."

– Crazy_Fun_3455

Artwork On The Mirror

"Yeah, I had the same thing happen, except it was a top tooth, and the whole roof of my mouth was puffy and sagging like the roof of an 86 Dodge Caravan."

"I had to travel for work, and was in a ton of pain. I had a layover in Denver, and went to the bathroom to check it out."

"I'm standing in front of the mirror, and press my thumb on the roof of my mouth. Green pus and blood erupts from around my front tooth and sprays all over the mirror. The smell was overwhelming, as was the pain."

"The guy who was washing his hands next to me couldn't take it- he immediately vomited in the sink and bailed out of the bathroom. I quickly tried to clean up as best as I could and made my way out of the carnage as well."

"Once that was gone I did feel a lot better."

"Edit: To the mustachioed gentlemen in the Denver airport, if you're reading this, I'm really sorry. You didn't need to see that- I had no idea it was going to happen, and I hope this hasn't affected you beyond your initial chunder."

– OnionMiasma

The One That Stayed Behind

"When I was in college I interned with a dentist and he would do a free dental day where transients and stuff could come in and get dental work done."

"One guy came in complaining of jaw pain, turns out that he had a baby tooth that never came out that got engulfed by an adult tooth that then pressed the baby tooth into his jaw. The tooth rotted and festered underneath the permanent tooth."

"The dentist extracted the permanent tooth and when he did it shot out a brown fluid that smelled exactly like death, followed by the baby tooth pieces. I pride myself on being pretty calm but when this happened I had to leave the room and vomit."

"It pretty much turned me off to wanting to be a dentist."

– itsthattedguy

These patients endured intense pain and suffering they couldn't soon forget.

Burrowed Friends

"I’m a dermatological surgical technician for skin cancer removal, aka Mohs. After removing a cancer from an older gentleman’s leg, we stitched him up and applied steri strips (which fall off by themselves within a week) so no wound care would be needed. The pressure dressing on top of the steris would simply have to be removed in a day or two."

"This older gentleman came back to the office 1 month after his surgery complaining of an odor coming from his post surgery wound. When he arrived, the 'odor' was far worse than expected. Employees of the office were gagging."

"Also, keep in mind, in dermatology we deal with smelly things such as cysts on the regular. Odor typically doesn’t bother us. Upon further examination, we realize this patient never took off our original dressing. Once the doctor came in and removed the dressing we saw anywhere from 60-100 maggots burrowed in this man’s open wound. All of which had to be manually extracted."

"Just another maggot Monday."

– Alexiwitchwork

Birthing A Bug

"I seen a fully grown botfly get removed from someone's arm while doing my college co-op at my local hospital."

– SnowyInuk

No, Thank You

"My daughter had pinworms when she was in kindergarten. For those who don’t know, they are small worms that crawl out of the anus and lay eggs, then crawl back inside. It was like something out of a horror movie."

– rupret1

Projectile Pus

"Lancing one of those diabetic cysts and what came out was a mixture of blood, pus and some thick black, what looked like a burnt French fry. At the end the last bit of pressure shot out everything and hit the wall. Smelled like a copper penny and what your cast smells like after a week or so."

– donutdong

After The C-Section

"A week after leaving the hospital from having my son via C-section, I was in horrific, screaming pain. Ended up in the ER, where it was discovered that I had a softball sized abscess directly behind the C-section cut. They needed to open me back up and get me cleaned out, but didn't want all that nasty sh*t to just spill out of me. So they put a tube in me and attached it to a bag to drain it. So I spent a day in a hospital bed with this clear bag filled with putrid, brown, rotting gunk attached to me. It smelled so bad, and looked even worse. Why did the bag have to be clear??? It's been 15 years, and thinking about it makes me gag."

– sallyface

The Attached "Gunk"

"I had a drain similar to yours after my appendix surgery site got infected, but I had mine on for several days. I honestly don’t know why they had to make it clear, the gunk was so damn nasty, but that wasn’t the worst part. That was the fact that since it was attached to me, I could feel how warm the gunk was and it made me feel so damn sick whenever i felt it."

– lonely_catt

Poor Elderly Resident

"A seriously compacted resident in a nursing home I worked at had stool coming out of every orifice. This poor man was throwing up stool it was horrifying. He passed shortly after that."

– AlienGoddess91

While many of these people experienced excruciating pain, the lingering memory of those moments appeared to be what they smelled as a result of their various infections being the worst.

Horrific, indeed.

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Cringe!: The All-Time Worst Attempts At Flirting

Reddit user Veetojek asked: 'What was the worst attempt at flirting you have ever seen?'

Not everyone excels in the art of flirting, and who can blame them?

Getting the attention of someone you admire can be nerve-wracking, and your lack of confidence in the heat of the moment can be amplified and make you appear less attractive to the object of your affection.

Curious to hear examples of what to avoid in the pursuit of passion, Redditor Veetojek asked:

"What was the worst attempt at flirting you have ever seen?"

These advances are just genuinely bizarre.

Inept Pupil

"My friend in college started hanging out with 'pick up artists' and decided to demonstrate his prowess to us on the quad. His strat was to approach a girl and ask what she thought he should make for dinner that night (I guess it was supposed to lead to an invitation?) He then very-much-not-confidently approached a girl who was clearly in a hurry and, staring at the ground, delivered the line. The girl glared at him and, with great annoyance, said 'I have no idea! Spaghetti, or something?' And my buddy, still staring at the ground, said 'Oh-oh-ok. Uh, thanks' and shuffled away."

He also “learned” from this group that you’re supposed to touch a girl’s arm every time she laughs to condition her to associate your touch with a release of dopamine or endorphins or something. So I witnessed this several times as well, never done with any subtlety or charisma. He did finally get laid after about eight months of trying but the whole thing seemed creepy to me."

– Dr_broadnoodel

Weird Pitch

"It was me. In sixth grade I wrote a girl’s name on a rock and threw it at her during recess. Apparently they don’t like that 🤷🏻♂️"

– neon_eyeballs

"Did your approach change much from those days with the introduction of pokeballs?"

– OP

Stranger Danger

"On a walk with my dog, hot sweaty and not in the best clothes. This man drove behind me following me for a few minutes and I looked and said can I help you? He said let’s go on a date! Hop in!"

"I said no thanks and he revved his engine, asked if I was sure then sped off. I was legit scared."

– Allieora

These attempts at flirting are straight from a sitcom.

Down The Rabbit Hole

"A man asked a woman sitting next to me, 'I think your name is Alice since I'm lost in Wonderland.'"

– boukaree

"Oof. That made me cringe, imagining it."

– No_Letterhead_7683

Hairy Situation

"Guy on a trip saw a new girl in our group that he found cute. Decided to take the insult-as-a-form-of-flirting path and told her she had really hairy arms for a girl. Mind you, she had incredibly fair skin, so her hairs stood out more than usual. She, having too nice of a personality to say anything, laughed it off, covered her arm in a real smooth manner, and went on with whatever conversation was happening. My guy thought it worked because it 'made her laugh;' and you know you've got the green light when she laughs at your jokes. The next day he goes up to her during breakfast thinking he locked it up and exclaims, 'Oh my god your arms are so hairy that it's gonna make me sick!!' She doesn't laugh this time, runs back to her room, and changes into a long-sleeve shirt. She proceeded to wear long-sleeve shirts or sweaters for the remainder of the trip...in the middle of July. They didn't have a single interaction for the remaining 4 days."

– TYRONEmonies

Fumbling For Words

"My own. Drunk at a party talking to a cute girl she takes her glasses off. I thought this would be a good time for a genuine compliment. What my mouth said 'I like your face better with your glasses on' she just laughed. Pretty sure what I was trying to say is I like your glasses, and you have a pretty face. I just combined them."

– HooterEnthusiast

Clumsy Gymnast

"When I was in 3rd grade I had a crush on my babysitter."

"I decided to impress her by demonstrating my acrobatic prowess. I sprung from the side of a spiral slide and grabbed the monkey bars without touching the ground. Unfortunately, my hands slipped, I flipped through the air, and shattered my wrist in two places upon landing."

"My first thought was, 'Don't cry; be tough.' then I saw my wrist, it looked like a sine wave. I immediately started crying."

– ANerdCalledMike

Some guys come on way too strong

Hey, Barkeep!

"I saw two girls talking at a bar, and this guy walks up and interrupts them with a 'Heheheyyy, what are you ladies drinkin tonight eh? (Slaps the bar) Hey Barkeep, lemme get a couple rounds for these two!' They of course took the drinks, but promptly relocated away from that obnoxious dude."

– Xdude199

Bye, Scooter

"When I was younger I worked in a bar with a guy nicknamed 'Scooter.'"

"He'd say to any girl that was alone at the bar, 'Hi! My name is Scooter. I like to f'k. How do you like me so far?'"

"Some would glare and walk away, and a couple of times he got slapped across the face...but eventually he'd get a giggle."

"And he never went home alone."

– PJMurphy

Scene From A Gas Station

"When I was working at a gas station I had a dude just walk up to the register and just go ‘hey you have a boyfriend’"

"Of course he didn’t take ‘I’m not interested’ for an answer after. My assistant manager had to all put shove him out the door to get him to leave."

– SilverSoulFox

Daddy Cringey

"I worked in retail for a long time."

"I’ll never forget the time when this late 50s looking guy blatantly cat called an older woman who was wearing black boots. He said, 'Damn baby you gonna wear those boots all day for daddy?'. Then she goes, 'Not a chance.' He went quiet and she walked away. I had to hold in my laughter cause it was just so cringey to see."

– xSevusxBean4y

Either one's advances can come off as presumptuous and cocky or vulnerable and meek.

In most cases, people looking for love are overthinking it.

Here's a tip: Just relax and be yourself when approaching someone you like.

Being natural will not make you look desperate.

While there are no guarantees in scoring a date with this approach, chances are that with practice, you'll gain more confidence without overdoing it.

As the saying goes, "if it ain't broke, don't fix it."

Nonetheless, several brands and businesses will sometimes make noticeable changes, be it to reach a wider audience, or simply to shake things up a bit.

In some cases, the effort pays off, like Dunkin' Donuts, who decided to stretch beyond simply selling doughnuts and coffee, eventually even dropping the "Donuts" from their name, but losing none of their popularity.

Other times, things don't go as smoothly, such as when IHOP (an acronym for the International House of Pancakes) temporarily changed its name to IHOB (International House of Burgers), which turned out to be nothing but a weeklong publicity stunt, but was met with anger and vitriol from it's fanbase during that controversial week.

Redditor Fflewddur_Fflam_ was curious to hear what other brands the Reddit community thought betrayed their core audience to disastrous results, leading them to ask:

"Who abandoned their core audience and paid the price for it?"

Humans Are Technically Animals...

"Animal Planet."

"Their tagline became 'surprisingly human.'"

"Nobody wants to watch ANIMAL Planet for people."

"They have other channels."- rainbirdmelody

You Could Say Their Mission Slipped Through The "Cracks"...

"Cracked.com."

"There were a couple years there where they transformed from a second rate Mad knockoff to some of the smartest, funniest stuff on the internet."

"Then the people who held the purse strings decided listicles and photoshop contests were more profitable than a writing staff."- MichaelMyersResple

"StumbleUpon."

"It was a small website giving you randomized internet pages which I used to browse for hours as they were so fun."

"Now it turned into Mix and I have no clue what it is."

"Pretty sure no one uses it and it makes me sad."- MightyDaisy

Working On It GIF by KAT BALLGiphy

Less Handcrafted, More Hand-Me-Down

"Etsy."

'Used to be a fairly cool place to buy and sell mostly handcrafted stuff and items to make handcrafted stuff."

"Now it's basically shady Amazon with worse shipping."

"Everyone seems to be drop shippers and a lot of the more niche crafter/artisan things are pushed out and overwhelmed by cheaper, mass produced goods."- THIS_IS_MY_JOYSTICK

The Dreaded Paywall...

"Photobucket!"

"Back when forums were still a thing, Photobucket would host your images for free."

"Then one day they decided EVERYONE would have to pay monthly, no free tier, nothing."

"We all collectively agreed we would not be paying, and that was that."

"I feel like it may have contributed to the death of forums."

"Ruined a few of my car build threads, that's for sure."

"To this day they still send me emails a couple times a year threatening to delete all my photos if I don't come back."-pr0b0ner

Arguably, All For The Best?...

"Yik Yak."

"It was a way to have conversations with people in the area anonymously (really popular on college campuses)."

"They made an update to create user profiles and pretty much everyone just stopped using it because anonymity was the whole point."- Fakjbf

episode 16 moe GIFGiphy

Chocolate Lovers Revolt!

"This is incredibly niche, but in Norway there used to be two providers of chocolate powder, the kind you mix with hot or cold milk to make hot chocolate or chocolate milk."

"They were O'Boy brand and Nesquik, equally loved and enjoyed a healthy fanbase 'rivalry'."

"O'Boy is a Swedish product sold in Scandinavia and the Baltics since the 50s, Nesquik is of course Nestlé brand and sold all over the world."

"Sometime in the 2010s Nesquik decided to change the formula of the choco powder."

"I imagine to save money."

"And for making hot chocolate the new recipe was fine."

"What Nestlé underestimated, however, is that most Scandinavians drink their choco powder cold to make chocolate milk."

"The new recipe had a different type of sugar in it that wouldn't dissolve in cold milk, leaving a crunchy powder in the milk."

"Norwegians outraged, Nesquik was deemed useless, nearly everyone in the Nesquik camp migrated to O'Boy, and Nestlé lost almost all its market share overnight."

"A few months later, Nesquik is gone from the shelves nearly everywhere, never to recover from the blunder."- -Yngin-

Tornados Filled With Sharks Are Not For Everyone...

"Sci-Fi Channel."

"At some point there was no sci-fi on it."- AlienBeingMe

Tara Reid Storm GIF by SYFYGiphy

Not Everyone Can Keep Up With The Times...

"RadioShack."

"They went from selling electronic components, little gadgets, and interesting tech bobbles to nerds to trying to sell expensive cell phone plans and sh*tty batteries to a different audience."

"We saw that the customers who came to RadioShack shifted from middle/upper-income engineers and tech geeks to lower income people in a six year period."

"Then we saw the geeks stop coming in at all because they would come in for some capacitor or breadboard, and the person there wouldn't know what that was."

"If it wasn't a phone, they didn't know."

"Even if it was a phone, they probably couldn't tell you anything about it."

"Old RadioShack employees were knowledgeable and well paid."

"New RadioShack employees didn't give a sh*t about technology."- 001235

Seems FittingThat Their Old Audience Is "History"...

"Anyone else remember when The History Channel was about history and not about aliens?"- rienjabura

Found Footage Video GIF by Eternal FamilyGiphy

There's A Reason They're Not So Well Known For Their Food...

"Every restaurant that opens in the UK goes through the cycle:"

"New and interesting food."

"Very different from most British food."

"Becomes very popular."

"Owners sell to a large company."

"Large company decides that being popular isn't enough, they want everybody to eat there."

"Make the food more British."

"Looming failure is hidden for a while because they attract new customers at exactly the rate they lose old customers."

"New customers have tried it, realize they can get that food anywhere, stop going."

"Chain closes and is replaced by a Greggs or Nandos, depending on the size of the location (not dependent on how far away the nearest Greggs or Nandos is."- skztr

Money Doesn't Solve Everything

"Quora."

"There were excellent groups with intelligent discussions."

"Then it became monetized and people submitted 100s of questions a day."

"'What time does the Walmart close in Boise?'" "

"'My 16 yr old came home with an A- so I took away their phone for 6 months'."- JanuarySoCold

Bored Sales GIF by EGiphy

Success can be a very dangerous thing.

As it can make you think about nothing but getting bigger, often resulting in your leaving people behind along the way.

A cautionary tale for young entrepreneurs.


What makes someone a 10?

It ain't all about looks, baby.

Looks are fine.

But charisma is everything.

There are a ton of ingredients that make up attractive, though.

That's why it's good to know your strengths.

Redditor Overall_Wish_912 wanted to hear about how hot everybody thinks they are and why, so they asked:

"What is the most attractive thing about you?"

I think my eyes sell the whole package.

Light blue with a slight dusting of gold.

Connections

Yoga Anatomy GIF by YOGABODYGiphy

"More than a few radiologists over the years have told me I have nice connective tissues, ligaments in particular. Makes a fella kinda proud."

Southern_Snowshoe

Lashed

"I have exceptionally long and beautiful eyelashes. I’m working on my flutter. I’m also a guy."

bleepbloopmunchmunch

"I get complimented on my eyelashes too as a guy! Women often tell me they’re jealous. I never had a clue that was something women noticed until I reached college/university."

EasterButterfly

"I started getting compliments in high school. I remember freshman year, I was sitting at a round table and this really cute girl at the table just randomly asked me to close my eyes. I thought it was weird, but I did. Then she told her equally cute friend to look at my eyelashes, that they were so long and pretty like a girl's. At the time I wasn't sure if they were being nice or making fun of me (since they compared them to girl's lashes). I now get the compliment, though, and appreciate it."

DesertRat012

Beauty

"I'm not totally hideous, but easily the most attractive thing about me is my kindness. I hear all the time that people are just magically drawn to me/feel comfortable with me/like being around me. I'm charming, I guess."

StrangersWithAndi

"That’s such a good quality."

Overall_Wish_912

Look Up

"I'm 6'2 and the internet tells me that's like the most incredible and attractive thing ever apparently."

ConflictFast8743

"I’m 6’6 and wish I was shorter. My long-term girlfriend tells me I get checked out all the time but I literally never notice, I’d give up all the attention if it meant I’d never hit my head on a doorframe again."

CaptainLongshorts

"I'm only 6', but a woman and I have a 36' inseam. I love having long legs, they walk so fast and are my favorite physical feature!"

abqkat

Light as a Feather

the office therapy GIFGiphy

"My therapist said I’m a good egg, so there’s that."

CheddarBurgers

"Mine told me she never feels heavy when I leave her office. We’ve talked about some heavy sh*t so I took it as a compliment."

random_username3184

Not being the scariest and worst patient is definitely a gold star moment for the mind.

Perfect

Regular Season Sport GIF by MLBGiphy

"I’ve been told I have the most perfectly shaped head for a bald man."

KilnMeSmallz

"My dermatologist recently told me I had a great shaped head if I were to ever shave my hair off. It really got me thinking."

Weeziir

For the Boys

"The only attractive thing about me is my hair. Even that is debatable since most women don't like men with long hair."

SlayzorHunter

"Haha for me it’s my bald head! I look a million times better without hair than with it even when my hairline wasn’t balding that bad. I think the pics of me at 28-30 I look better than my 18-25 pics."

OkSwitch470

"Some men just have the cranial and facial structures that make them look better with bald head. I shave my head every 3 years, so I know how I look with every single hair length there is. It only starts looking decent after at least 9 months of growth."

SlayzorHunter

Share With Me

"I'm very nonjudgemental; it's amazing the things people will share with me!"

PeterGivenbless

"Same. I've had people share some pretty personal things with me soon after meeting them."

Krissyfox_7

"Yup, same. I have 'tell me all your secrets' stamped on my forehead. I do like it, though. Nice to get to know who people actually are and what they’ve been through, as opposed to the robotic small talk. Makes me happy that people see me as a 'safe' person."

East_Satisfaction242

Streaks

"I have bright blue eyes that get me plenty of compliments. The only other thing that gets close is my beard, and now especially the silver streaks lacing it."

fuqaduck

"The Silver helps. I was accused of dying it to look more dignified by a coworker, which was puzzling. Not quite a compliment, but compliment adjacent I guess."

604Ataraxia

The Nuzzle

"My long nose, it’s perfect for nuzzling the bean while dining out 🤤."

sussyboingus

"I had an out-of-the-blue compliment about my nose. A woman approached me and said I had an envied Roman nose. Noticing my confusion, she explained she was an art historian, and my nose was in the mold of Roman marble statutes. I've never heard another compliment about my nose, so who knows."

TWH_PDX

The Body

The Simpsons Dance GIFGiphy

"I’m short but I have a very nice figure. I get complimented for my butt a lot. I’m 5’2." I like attention so I don’t mind the compliments for the most part. I don’t get bothered by that as easily as some people do. But I have no respect for men that complement my body when they’re in relationships."

DrWiskers

Well, there are a lot of definitions for attractive.

Thank goodness.

a man and a woman walking in the desert

NEOM on Unsplash

When you're in a relationship, the things your significant other—or sig-O—does hit different.

Teasing remarks you'd laugh off from friends can feel like a knife in the heart when your romantic partner says it.

Minor slights can easily become major issues in your relationship if you feel vulnerable.

Keep reading...Show less