One time, my freshman year of high school, I really wanted to be 1996 cool, so I wore a floor length skirt and heels to school. Except I had never work either before and I'm not even 5 feet tall (so I was maybe 4'7" for this) so "floor length" skirt on me means floor length ... and then some.
I managed to get myself tangled, fall down a ramp, and cause the domino-style collapse of about 40 other kids.
I will have you know no amount of praying will cause the earth to open up and swallow you whole, body and soul, thus erasing your existence from the fabric of the universe. 9th grade me tried. Really, really hard.
So anyway Reddit wants to share some of their great moments in cringe, too. And I'm going to let them. Cause there's no way I'm taking this tumble by myself. I didn't in high school, certainly not about to start now.
Buckle up, homies. Away we go.
Aaaand Scene
Doing a practice for a play in front of a small crowd of like maybe 35 - 50 people when I pooped my pants. Middle of my lines a felt the wetness and had to run off stage. I kept my self locked in a room the rest of the day.
Experience
Went in for an interview for a banquet server position. I had no server experience, but I was imagining standing on the other side of a buffet line scooping food onto people's plates.
First thing this woman asks me to do is carry a tray full of dishes to the other side of the room. I have never done this, at all. But how hard could it be?
So in all my genius, I bend over the top of the tray, grab the sides (including the tray stand underneath) and shuffle to the other side of the room. Technically I did what she asked, but apparently she wanted someone with "experience".
Periodic Surprises
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I was raised Mormon, and they have these temples where you can go do rituals as a proxy for dead people so they can go to heaven (yes, its as weird as it sounds lol). The one teens do involves being baptized for someone who never was, and the Mormons do baptism by immersion (ie, they don't sprinkle water on your head, you're dunked, completely submerged, into a pool of water). You do this while wearing special all-white clothes the temple itself usually provides, including the underwear (which are the same as those weird white underwear garments you may have seen online in those "magic Mormon underwear" memes).
I got my first-ever period while in those white clothes, IN the baptismal font, age 12. 😐
Once got my period in the middle of a scene in a junior school play. I was 12/13.
A Little Too Excited
I was 19, working at a small, tightknit smoothie place. We got a new guy, he seemed nice. Not long after he started, he started talking about how his roommate was going to start there soon as well. The first time they worked together, I looked at them and thought, "Oh they are so dating."
They didn't really interact with each other that I noticed, barely even looked at each other. Not long later, I'm working with guy #1, we get to talking about dating and he reveals that him and his roommate are actually partners. I literally started jumping up and down, practically screeching:
"I knew it I knew it I knew it!"
🤮 I remember this every once in a while and hate myself all over again 🙃
Raw Meat
I was interested in a guy but didn't know how to start a conversation with him. We were standing next to each other while preparing food for a barbecue and I just thought it was a good idea to start a conversation with "I like the feeling of touching raw meat"
I guess he thought I was the weirdest person ever because after getting out of that situation he never really talked to me again. Don't worry tho, I'm over it.
Groping A Penguin
I was walking into an expensive hotel with a friend and I tripped going up the stairs. As I was stumbling, I reached for the handrail. I didn't notice there was someone standing against the railing until I grabbed his ass instead of the handrail.
He turned around and said "Sorry, guess my ass was in the way."
I couldn't look him in the face as I apologized profusely, but noticed he was a really tall guy (I am only 5'0" tall). While checking into the hotel my friend and I noticed there were lots of big guys walking around and commented on it.
Someone then told us that the Pittsburgh Penguins were staying at the hotel that night, and we realized I had groped a professional hockey player. I have no idea which player I groped as I was too humiliated to really look at him as I apologized.
- rma0623
A Real Puzzler
When I was 16 I got set up with a family friend's daughter. We started dating in a long distance relationship. After a month or so it was school holidays and I went up to visit her. I didn't have alot of money but I wanted to buy her a gift. A settled on a beautiful jig saw puzzle.
She wasn't too happy about the gift. Because she was blind. Yes I bought my blind girlfriend a jigsaw puzzle. In the moment it seemed very appropriate because I thought each piece was unique, right? She can feel the pieces right??
Pure effing cringe. Still haunts me.
"Ghost Version"
One time in like 5th or 6th grade, I was at my friends house playing hide and go seek "ghost" version. Basically it's hide and go seek with all of the lights off so it is dark.
Everyone who was anyone in our tiny town was there. We were the "cool" group. So, I was hiding right behind an open bedroom door. When the "seeker" came into the room I, obviously, couldn't see her. However, I knew she was there and then thought she left the room. So I had the bright idea to slam the door shut by kicking it with all of my awkward-middle-schooler strength. Lo and behold she was still standing in the doorway, super quietly.
That door damn near broke her nose when it hit her with the speed of light. Now, she was always a bit dramatic, but she absolutely LOST it. She yelled and claimed I did it on purpose. I felt absolutely horrible and started sympathy crying instantly. I apologized over and over. Then, she had the AUDACITY to tell everyone I was trying to be the center of attention while apologizing and making sure she was okay by getting ice for her nose and what not.
This is the most cringe worthy experience of my life as I obviously couldn't get mad at her for being mean and making everyone hate me since I had just turned her into a short nosed pug puppy on accident in front of all of our friends.
Racist Mom
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Oh man. Some context, my best friend growing up was black. We were inseparable, we wanted to make video games together when we grew up, all that.
Well, he went with me and my mom to the store. As we were driving, a man nearly ran into her car, and she shouted:
"Fcking ni**er!"
It got quiet in the car, so she turned and said to my best friend in the back "You're not the ni**er I was talking to," as a way to apologize.
I was young, but even then I knew something awful had happened. It completely changed how I looked at my mom and how my best friend looked at my family. We stayed friends, kinda, but I had to hang out at his house since he stopped coming to mine.
Couldn't blame him. Super-cringy, life-changing.
- Tonyadpx
Fired
The time my internet access was shot over a weekend, so I went to work as usual on Monday, and stayed and worked all day; and then when I got home my internet was back and I found out I'd been fired via e-mail the week before .
Small, very high-profile business. This was a very small firm. The owner was famous within the field; think of a celebrity with a staff of 7 people. No HR, no manager, just a small group of people glad to work there. I was there as a freelancer. Everyone was acting weird all day.
I soft-broil myself to sleep in this memory.
50 Yard Dash
Late response but I will remember this until I die. If I ever get dementia this will be the one memory I keep.
So I was on the swim team when I was about 11 or 12 and I had my first swim competition and it was finally my turn and I was super excited. Well the announcer said it was a 50 yard dash and I thought that meant two laps not one. Well when I finally finished the two laps I was still super proud of myself until I realized the entire room was now silent.
Awkward.
Oblivious To The Fart
Farted in class during a test back in middle school. Everybody knew it was me but I was too awkward to confirm or deny it so I just acted oblivious. That fart must've been pretty awful because a bunch of classmates around me covered their noses with their shirts and the teacher cracked open a window. Just the complete awkward silence that followed the fart and the feeling of everybody staring at me in disgust still makes me shudder with cringe whenever I think about it.
High School Musical
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For non uniform day in my last year of primary school I wore a red and grey striped zip up hoodie, a red corduroy skirt and underneath that blue jeans. I though I looked like hot shit, I had never looked so cool in my entire life until that day.
Then a boy in my class said I looked like someone from High School Musical and I started crying and then the teacher had to give a big impassioned speech about how we all have the right to wear whatever we want and nobody should tease each other because of their appearance. The whole time everyone was looking at me because I was still crying while this was going on.
I had done such a good job of burying that memory!
Kate Todd's Lap
I'm a Canadian and we had this show in the 2000's called Radio Free Roscoe. I was obsessed with this show! I watched it religiously on the Family Channel. My aunt had a friend who was a makeup artist for the show and so she managed to get us on set to meet the cast and visit all the different places. My 11 year old self was ecstatic! It was the most incredible thing to happen to me. My brother and make cousin went with us
We get to the set and it's amazing and everything I had hoped it would be. We got to see them film a scene and see all the behind the scenes stuff, it was incredible. We went to do the meet and greet with the cast and I was so nervous but excited. I'm an awkward girl and super oblivious especially when I'm nervous.
Kate Todd (the female co-star) was being super sweet with me because I was the only girl in our group. She called me over to sit with her for the photos and used her hand to pat the seat beside her.
Being oblivious I missed the seat pat and went and sat directly on her lap. I'm 27 years old now and I still remember her saying "Oh! Um, Okay" in a super surprised voice. I was mortified that I just sat on her damn lap like a baby instead of beside her like she intended. I honestly couldn't look anyone in the eyes again after that. I still cringe to this day thinking about sitting on her damn lap. She was super sweet about it but I knew I had fucked up.
Pajamas
So when I was 8 or so, some of my parents' friends came over, and they brought their son, who was a few years older than me. I used to really idolize that kid for some reason...he just seemed cool and was always friendly toward me. So this particular day I happened to be lounging around in my pajamas watching television and I hadn't expected company. I don't know why, because wearing pajamas (especially as an 8-year-old boy) is not that big of a thing, but I was absolutely mortified when the kid came into the room to say hi.
So I ended up running to the closet nearby and shutting the door. This was right in front of the kid. My parents couldn't get me out. The kid came up and through the door was like, "that's totally fine, bud, there's nothing for you to be embarrassed about, come out and play. If you want you can go change first."
But I wasn't having any of it. I was by this point more embarrassed about my reaction than being "caught" in pajamas, so I couldn't bring myself to come out until the kid and his parents left like two hours later.
The Ultimate Cringe
In 9th grade, I wrote a radio DJ a really nasty email because he didn't like Limp Bizkit.
- Bells87
When we're intoxicated, or even the slightest bit tipsy from having a little too much to drink, our immediate perspective on things is hazy.
But there's nothing like a bit of alarming news or a jarring incident to snap us out of the fog and focus on the moment.
Sometimes alcohol isn't always to blame for our impairment.
It can be a state of mind, like a perpetual numbness from being complacent in life, and all it takes is one shocking moment to rattle us back to our senses.
Curious to hear from strangers online about this type of scenario, Redditor Known_Challenge_7150 asked:
"What’s one thing that sobered you up real quick?"
These individuals were witness to shocking events that sobered them up right quick.
Bleeding Out
"Got out of a taxi and found a naked man profusely bleeding from his head crawling up the driveway in my condo. Called him an ambulance completely forgot I was absolutely wasted until 45 minutes later when I'd helped him translate and in to an amublance and stepped in my front door."
"Later a few days later learned he'd slipped in the tub and literally crawled out for help. Poor dude. He was fine but I genuinely thought he was going to die there."
– DongLaiCha
Tragic News
"At a bachelor party and we got a phone call that the groom’s father had suddenly passed."
– accountnameredacted
Bottom Of The Barrel
"I went to visit my parents back in July. I was homeless and deep into fentanyl addiction so I lost a lot of weight. My folks could see it. They knew something was up. Anyway, I spent the night and I was getting ready to leave in the morning and I looked at myself in the mirror for a good long time. I finally had enough and told them everything. They took me to detox, from there I went to rehab. Graduated in August and been living with them ever since then. I have 160 days clean and sober."
– Crotch-Monster
A reality check can be enough for some people to snap out of it.
Like Father, Like Son
"Was driving a drunk friend home, he had been on a bender again and was smart enough to call me for a lift rather than try and drive. As I helped in to his house his mother came down the stairs and said 'your as drunk as your father' and went back upstairs. I haven't seen him drunk since then, he still drinks but the thought of turning into his dad scared him out of hard drinking."
– psycospaz
Busted
"Flashing blue lights."
– FiddleOfGold
"This sobered me up just thinking about it."
– redmaple_syrup
Losing Sight
"Woke up to no sight in one eye. I had cataract surgery so just thought one of the lenses had slipped and it was an easy fix. Eye doc says nope, you had a stroke. I loved soy sauce, teriyaki sauce and salty food, which caused high blood pressure, which caused retina damage. Over six months was able to get most of my eyesight back with medication, and all back within a year. Trying to navigate life with one eye was very sobering. Started taking HBP much more seriously."
– MissHibernia
Quitting The Bottle
"Looked up someone I went to highschool with who was an awesome guy. Found out he had been dead for 3 years from alcoholism, at age 33. I made an overnight change. I hadn't started drinking that night yet, 10 months ago. Haven't touched it again since."
– omgtater
These disturbing moments were enough for Redditors to immediately come to their senses.
Unplanned House Guests
"Me and a buddy Woke up in someone’s living room, realized neither one of us knew the people, they were just nice and let 2 drunk guys sleep on their living room floor. We didn’t even say goodbye."
– Oneinsevenbillion75
Serious Health Warning
"Elevated liver enzymes."
"And the knowledge that this sh** was gonna kill me and I just couldn't orphan my family over it."
"So I opted for recovery, instead."
"Clean and sober since June 5, 2009."
– Far_Meal8674
The Joyride
"Grew up in a rural area. The little town hosted dances at the hockey arena, everyone (adults and kids) went and they overserved everyone, regardless of age. I was maybe 16 or 17 and was absolutely sh*tfaced, and jumped in the back of someone's truck with about 8 other people to go back to someone's cottage for after dance drinking. The driver (still don't know who it was) started racing one of his buddies and we whipped around small dirt roads, flying around blind corners on the wrong side of the road, going god knows how fast. It was basically a disaster waiting to happen. It was crazy scary and I was sober and thankful to be alive when we finally arrived."
– foxfood9116
The human psyche is a fascinating thing, isn't it?
How we can automatically focus on something urgent at a crucial time, even after getting buzzed from drinking too much alcohol.
But as we're in the thick of the holidays, it's a good reminder to drink responsibly and stay off the roads if you drive to your celebratory destination.
Cheers. Stay safe. And happy holidays.
We've all complained or vented about something in our lives which, in the grand scheme of things, wasn't exactly a problem, or is very easily solved.
Then there are those who complain about things that others almost hope will happen to them at some point in their lives.
These are known as "first world problems", as they are problems that pretty much only the world's one percent faces.
From having to fly business class instead of first class, or being served Roederer instead of Dom Pérignon, these complaints are often met with amusement, bewilderment, or even anger.
Redditor jennimackenzie was curious to hear the most absurd "first world problems" anyone ever complained about, leading them to ask:
"What’s the most ridiculous 'first world problem' you’ve seen people get worked up over?"
"Tale As Old As Time..."
"I once knew a mom who was legitimately devastated, to the point of tears/grief, because a doctor predicted her 8 year old daughter's final height to be around 5'2","
"Which wasn't tall enough to get cast as Belle at Disney World."
"That was the child's (and her mother's) only dream in life, apparently."
"Didn't appreciate my suggestion that she could be Minnie or Mickey."
"Lol!"
"Only a face character would do!"- TravelLovingMom
"Must Be Funny, In A Rich Man's World..."
"My boss from about a decade ago was this insanely rich dude who always went to the bank to get fresh and crisp currency."
"He'd call the bank in advance to make sure they had some on hand."
"I think he was a germaphobe."
"He had a trash can that he'd throw $1 and $5 bills in that he thought was 'dirty' and regularly just donated it vs spending it."
"I asked him why he did this and he said it was too much trouble and asked if I wanted it."
"I said f*ck yeah dumped it into my bag and when I got home it was close to $400 in singles and fives.
"Another time, he wanted to upgrade all the computers in his studio, so we went to a store and bought 10 PCs."
"They all had $150 mail in rebates and he wasn't bothered to go through the trouble of mailing them in."
"3 weeks later I received $1500 after spending a whole afternoon filling out all those goddamn forms."- azninvasion2000
Money Burn GIF by nog
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Who Wore It Better?
"When I was about 19 years old, I was at my boyfriends family BBQ."
"I was wearing this pretty floral sundress."
"His cousins girlfriend showed up in the same dress and she was SO mad that she went and changed."
"I will never understand being upset when someone is wearing the same thing as you.'
"Did you really think that your shirt you bought off the rack is going to be unique to you?"
"No."- mertsey627
Seeing Red! Or Blue In This Case...
"The blue of the balloons wasn't quite the same as the bridesmaid's sashes."
"Years ago my wife and I attended a wedding."
"It was very low key."
"The dinner was in the dining hall at the university where the couple met, cinder block walls and all."
"It was a Baptist wedding - no booze and very serious."
"The dark blue balloons attempting to liven up the hall were a slightly darker shade of blue than the sashes on the bridesmaid's dresses."
"The bride lost here sh*t and absolutely raved for nearly an hour."
"I can't remember how they finally managed to talk her down."- mechant_papa
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See You In Court!
"Rich neighbors who end up in expensive court battles because they disagree about where a tree can be planted or whether the color of a fence fits in with the street’s 'amenity'."
'These disputes get really heated and rack up huge lawyers’ bills."
"The most pathetic part is after the judgement when they are arguing about who should pay the other party’s costs."
"Lots of affidavits filed citing the 'emotional distress' they had to endure, or painting themselves as brave warriors who were forced to take a stand to fight for 'justice'."
"Also lots of pompous litigants insisting that the judge refer to them by their 'Dr' title."
"An absolutely insane dumpster fire of entitled rich people problems."- ElectrocRaisin
It's Always People With Money Who Don't Want To Pay!
"I work in a public library."
"People will get so so mad if they have to be put on a wait list for a book."
"A popular book that just came out."
"Ok our services are not only free but so are the books."
"You’re welcome, a**holes."- Switchbladekitten
A Warm Butt Is A Happy Butt!
"My own."
"We have a bidet toilet seat (Fabulous! Everyone should have one!) and not only does it wash your bum and blow dry it, but the seat's heated!"
"It's shocking how much a heated toilet seat makes the whole process more agreeable."
"Except: We had a power outage and I went to use the toilet and the seat was cold!"
"Unacceptable!"
"This shall not stand!"
"I was really upset because it didn't feel good."
"Then I stopped and thought: This is the most first-world problem anyone's ever had."
"I was really pissed because my heiny was tepid."
"I got over it."- DeathGrover
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Holy Matrimony!
"Weddings are a gold mine for this question."
"People get so hyped up over their 'most important day of their life'."
"They'll destroy friendships, go into debt, and have crazy expectations."
"It's not always the couple who go crazy, either."
"Sometimes, it's the parents or another family member who feels entitled to control the wedding."
"It's just a party."
"Be considerate of guests, have plenty of food and drinks, and enjoy it."- magicrowantree
When Fast Food Isn't Fast Enough...
"Having to pull off to the side to wait for a drive-thru order to be brought out to you because your food isn't ready and there's a line building up behind you."- demanbmore
In Case You Don't Think Customer Service Employees Are Undervalued...
"I was working the return desk at a Target next to a military base so I have so many stories."
"One of my favorites was a lady who had her baby shower before revealing the gender and was livid that she had received floral newborn diapers when she’s having a boy."
"It was a huge box of super expensive, all organic diapers, that we didn’t carry and therefore could not return."
"I cannot accurately express her fury and disgust."
"How dare either suggest her boy could wear feminine diapers."
"I suggested she donate them if she didn’t want to use them and she instead threw away the entire box."
"When she left we pulled it out and threw it in our donate bin."
"There have also been multiple times where mom’s order massive toys and when we bring them out to the car they get furious that they aren’t wrapped."
"We don’t offer wrapping services."
"Here’s the thing, if you don’t want your kids to see the toys you got them for Christmas or their bit to day DON'T BRING THE CHILD WHEN YOU PICK IT UP."
'I’ve had multiple women scream and curse me out that I had ruined their kids Christmas by bringing the toys they ordered out to the car like they requested."- clever-mermaid-mae
Customer Service Waiting GIF by Juno Calypso
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Happiest Place On Earth!
"I used to work for Disney."
"That in itself should tell you everything."
"However for fun I'll give you two specific stories one form our tech department and one from my wife who worked bookings."
"I specifically worked for their call center to help with technical issues with magic band and the website."
"Suddenly got worse huh?"
"A right of passage call everyone has at least one story of is the 'Dome call'."
"Basically there is a subset of Disney Guest (TM) that believes if it rains at Walt Disney world there is someone that will push a button to encapsulate the whole of Disney property in a dome to keep out the rain."
"I'm not kidding."
"If this button is not pushed they call our tech department to angrily ask why."
"My wife worked booking."
"Pretty much everything including Bibbidi Bobbidi boutique and Pirate's league."
"These two things did roughly the same thing difference being price and theme."
"BBB was expensive did more and was focused on princesses, pirates league did a bit less and focused on mermaids and pirates."
"Lady called up my wife, and got pissed about BBB being booked up (It goes FAAAAST)."
"Karen: 'Im going to give the phone to my daughter and I want you to tell her how you are ruining her vacation by not letting her do BBB'."
"Wife proceeds to explain how pirate's league is so much cooler and how she can be a mermaid or pirate and basically gets the kid to start demanding to their parents about how they want to be a mermaid instead of a princess."- trollsong
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The horror!
Being booked into a junior suite at Disney World instead of an executive suite!
It's almost as bad as having no money for groceries, or no food to feed you children...
Said absolutely no one.