Ah married life, that's when you're living the dream.... well so they say.
Those of us unmarried relics wouldn't know but it's sure fun learning about.
Who hasn't wondered what the most major life changes will be once vows are swapped and the clergy says "you may kiss your partner."
Maybe the biggest surprise is that there is little to no change.
That would seem like a letdown.
Let's find out.
Redditor BoboDClown2019 wanted all the matrimonial partners out there to speak up by asking:
"Married people of Reddit, what did you only start doing in your relationship after you got married?"
"Wife legit wants a Vacuum cleaner for Christmas. No necklaces, no diamonds, just another Dyson stick vacuum that we can just keep in the basement. This will make her happy. I meanwhile will feel like a bad 50's husband, but its a sacrifice I make for my wife."
Blog_Pope
Chefs.
"Cooking, my husband was a chef and has always been amazing at cooking, I never really cooked at home (unless mr noodles or frozen dinners count). Once we moved in, I started calling my mom (who is also a chef) and asking her how to make certain dishes. Turns out I'm pretty damn good at cooking, somethings that I've made, both my mom and hubby wanted to learn the recipe form me!"
"Starting learning to cook 9 months ago."
dotsisu
RIP my love.
"Quit checking out every room I walked into for hot available females. My wife was seriously, always the most beautiful person in the room and we would talk about anything and everything under the sun. She was my best friend too. Rebecca passed away from breast cancer on May 17th of this year. I'm still not looking. RIP my love."
DeanSmartin
I Got Out.
"Most of these are good... mine's not. After I got married was when my (now-ex) husband's abuse became apparent. He straight up told me he owned me now and could do whatever he wanted to me.""
"Yeah there were signs before hand (hindsight is 20/20) but once it was legal, it became glaringly obvious. We had our first married fight on day 1 of being mr and mrs.
"Took 3 years but I got out."
foxes-and-flowers
Nothing.
"Honestly if you talk to any just married couple, most don't feel any different at all. Nothing changes."
"It just becomes more socially acceptable to start discussing having kids."
"The only thing that really changed for us was that I was suddenly comfortable getting loans in both our names and combining our finances. Finances are likely the most important factor when it comes to marriage."
Trigger93
GiphyThe Guinea Pig.
"Cooking, sadly my mother never taught me how to cook so my husband was my Guinea pig. I feel bad because it took me a few years to learn how to make food edible."
otherm0ther
Coffee Forever.
"My parents both never drank coffee and didn't really care for the taste of it. Someone gifted them a coffee maker as a wedding present. They tried it out their first morning married and have made coffee every morning since."
it_helper
For the Very 1st Time....
"We started having sex. We were both virgins."
"It's been an amazing 4 years! The first time was was way better then everyone said it would be and it's been fun for us to learn and explore everything for the first time together."
CzCzCz540
Money. Money. Money.
"Share finances (we did some before but it becomes more integrated), bought a house together, no condoms, life insurance and such being in your spouses name, a lot more compromise on decisions... nothing is different right away but you start doing these things slowly."
Goofball412a
GiphyLiving Situations.
"Lots of realizing I suck at cohabitation and need to clean up after myself more. Learning to say no to the things I want even if it doesn't put us in a bad financial situation we got goals and stuff so I want those to happen more than some upgraded SSD for my computer."
mynipplescutglass
Hey Hubby....
"Calling him my husband. That's about it."
dsteere2303
"Ours was the same way. It's kind of a relief though isn't it? It's hard to explain but saying "wife" instead of "girlfriend" when we met new people was so much easier."
Fair_University
Giphy"Honey, what's wrong?"
"Everything. I married my husband, who was in the Navy, at 18, and he immediately moved me across the country and then got deployed, leaving still teenage me alone in a strange place trying to take care of our home alone."
"My sweet, elderly neighbor, who had been really lonely because her son didn't visit often, came over the first week with some flowers from her garden. I was so touched I started crying, and she said, "Honey, what's wrong?" I was like, "How do you write a check to pay bills?????"
"She helped me, and we became really good friends. I'll never forget her."
Christian_Writer
People Explain Activities They've Added To Their Post-Pandemic Bucket List | George Takei’s Oh Myyy
While we've all been cooped up for the better part of two years, many of us have been dreaming up exciting plans for the future. Maybe it's finally time to s..."Dear & Moose"
"He tried calling me "dear" when we were dating. I jokingly told him "don't call me dear, I'm not your wife," he never did it again. Fast forward a few years, we get married and walking out of the court house he whispers in my ear "I can call you dear now." So now he calls me dear and I call him Moose."
ScaredOfSocks
The Brood.
"Having children."
ImSharticus
"I always found it funny that despite how religious her side of the family is, my mum and both her siblings all had a daughter that had a kid before getting married."
Mad_Squid
Same Old. Same Old.
"Having the same damn thoughts and voicing them at the same time. 🤦♀️"
caligirl41
"Or wearing basically the same clothes. Feels like that started happening more and more often."
Fair_University
GiphyNothing special.
"Nothing special. The usual things that go with being married, co-habituating, taxes, sharing things."
"If you start doing things you didn't do before you were married, you may run into problems. Be who you are all the time, and that way when you do find the right one they like for you for all of that."
phydeaux70
The Annuals.
"Creating 'traditions' together. It is our wedding anniversary this month and I am looking forward to arguing about how big the chunks of bacon should be while making home made pizzas, listening to flashback Friday all while wearing my wedding dress."
dalekbearkissme
Let's Chat.
"Honestly if you talk to any just married couple, most don't feel any different at all. Nothing changes."
"It just becomes more socially acceptable to start discussing having kids."
"The only thing that really changed for us was that I was suddenly comfortable getting loans in both our names and combining our finances. Finances are likely the most important factor when it comes to marriage."
Trigger93
Putting Work In....
"Gardening. She loves it. I see it as more chores, but I love her so I will happily do extra chores to see her happy."
"This is literally what my dad told me when I'll know I've found the right woman. When I'll willingly do extra chores just go make her happy."
"Unmarried at 33....."
FrankieFillibuster
Bon Voyage....
"Nothing really changed. We had already been living together for almost 10 years... getting married was basically just an excuse to party and go to Hawaii."
mejok
"How fun was that wedding? You had an excuse to party, sounds like it was really really fun!"
ToInfinityandBirds
Giphy8 years +
"Not much. Taxes and finances obviously changed. I think the thing that actually changed is now I’m more forward about voicing when I have a problem. But I don’t think that’s because we’re married I think it’s because we have been together for 8 years and we’re secure enough where we can hash out problems or even fight without feeling like the relationship is in jeopardy."
TheBrontosaurus
Read to Me
"I know a couple, where the husband started reading books to his wife to replace some of their date nights. It was like, one of the most romantic things I've ever heard and something I never realized I missed from childhood and would want in a relationship."
TechniChara
Presents...
"Buying her more things to let her know that I care about her. She doesn't expect it, but it's great to see her eyes light up over anything from flowers to a new ring or necklace. Also, only asking for a basket of breaded fish and some vinegar for my birthdays since I don't really care to celebrate getting older anymore."
Firesky21
Let's do Wendy's
"Bickering about who pays for McDonalds when we're together. When we were dating we would usually pay for ourselves or spot each other on occasions. But since we got married we have an unspoken word of if we get food one of us has to pay for both. It's stupid, but it's funny and but at the same time. Usually ends with us laughing and stealing each other's fries."
gears_be_ground
wendy delivers GIFGiphyHype...
"We're each other's hype man. When he or I wake up feeling crappy, we just lay together and say how awesome we are and how we can get through the day to come home and be fat."
KenziKitteh
You always want to be comfortable around your life partner... but maybe not too comfortable like keeping the bathroom door open when it's occupied.
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A recent Redditor was curious to hear what tourists and locals alike should avoid doing in the USA, leading them to ask:
"In the United States, what should you never do?"
Stay out of the skies!
"Don't fly a drone in Washington, DC."
"The whole D.C. Area is a no fly zone."
"It's a federal offense."
"Just don't do it."- PeytonCarrK
Cops can't be bribed.
"Don't try to bribe cops when you get pulled over."
"I had some Argentinian friends immediately pull out their wallets and start pooling their cash when they got pulled over once.'
"Fortunately someone in the car noticed and told them to put it away immediately."- PeytonCarrK
"Don't pay off the police."
"My dad has friends from several third-world nations where it is common practice to give the police some cash when you are pulled over."
"However, if you try to bribe a police officer here, you'll get into a lot of trouble."- JohnASmiley
Know your rights.
"Everyone, including foreigners, has the right to be silent and have a lawyer when being questioned."
"Don’t say anything."
"Also, even if you speak English fairly well, ask for an interpreter."- WickedLilThing
Enjoy all that nature has to offer... carefully!
"Don't wander off in the national parks."
"It's very real wilderness and you can get lost and die out there."
"This includes going over railings you aren't supposed to, or off trails."
"People have died accidentally falling into a steam geyser that looked like normal water, mauled by animals or left to the elements."- AlphaOhmega
national parks GIF by Visit The USAGiphyAllow plenty of time!
"Expect consistency at TSA in airports."- WickedLilThing
Some terminology doesn't translate...
"If you’re from England, they’re called cigarettes here."- Yung_Onions
Make sure your license is up to date.
"If you come from a walkable country don’t come here expecting the same."
"There are some areas with good public transportation and bicycle/pedestrian friendly streets but for the most part, especially outside of cities, the areas are designed to accommodate cars more than anything else."
"The reason a lot of Americans drive everywhere is because, depending on where you live, we have no choice."- The_Cars93
Dog Driving GIFGiphyWait for instructions.
"Get out of your car and approach the cop when being stopped by a cop unless told to."- hildrash
Whether your'e waling down a street in a foreign country, or the street you've lived on for your entire life, it's always wise to be on guard and aware of your surroundings.
Not to mention, obey the law.
Redditor nobody-and-68-others was eager to hear the funniest "you mamma" jokes people have ever heard, leading them to ask:
"What are the best “Yo mama” jokes you got?"
Yo mamma's so fat...
"yo mamma so fat she wakes up in sections."- LolCoca
"Yo mama so fat when I had a threesome with her I never met the other guy."- 1nzlocky
Fat GIF...How fat Is she?
"Yo mama's so fat she outweighs the needs of the many."- BenefitsCustardbatch·
"Yo mama’s so fat that every time she turns around, it’s her birthday."- Amphibutter·
Yo mamma's so ugly...
'Yo mama so ugly, criminals break into her house just to close the curtains."- Cap_the_pro
"Yo mama so ugly your dad wakes up with morning wouldn't."- lukeedbnash
"Yo mama so ugly, her portraits hang themselves."- SolHalcyon
the emperors new groove hangover GIFGiphyThis could have so many meanings...
"The earth was flat until they buried yo mama."- jaymo54
Fat AND Ugly?
"Yo mama so fat, when she goes on a diet, the stock market drops."
"Yo mama so ugly, she threw a boomerang and it refused to come back."- SophisticatedOtaku
Needless to say, not all jokes are to everyone's taste.
Something to keep in mind when sharing these jokes with others.
Particularly with, "yo mamma", or anyone else's...
Reddit user itchellFamily1045 asked:
"Which show do you think you're the only person who remembers it exists?"
It was David the Gnome for me (which I found out originated in Spain and was much more popular in France than it was in the US. Apparently, I was a Euro-trash hipster as a child), but let's take a look at what got Reddit.
Classic Wheel Of Fortune
wheel through the years GIF by Wheel of FortuneGiphy"It's funny how nobody seems to remember the early seasons of Wheel of Fortune with host Chuck Woolery. You didn't win any cash. You had to choose prizes from a selection of things set up in a room-like fashion."
- opus_4_vp
"They still had the prize room with sajak for a while I believe. Camera would just pan across the room and the winner would try not to pick the stupidest things. Cause the items all had fn price tags on em and you'd only have the $ amount you won. Infuriating"
- Frosty_Shoulder_7825
"A broyhill coffee table!!"
- atlantachicago
"Always ending up with the porcelain dog statue cause it was all you had left after buying expensive items."
- captainvancouver
Eerie
"Eerie, Indiana"
- dammagedone
"I still think about the episode where everyone who stayed young, slept in Tupperware, and when their lids got taken off, aged overnight."
- CatasaurusRox
"Foreverware!"
"One of my favorite moments on the show had Marshall and Simon hanging out in Simon's room, one night. Through the walls you can hear a man and a woman laughing lecherously."
"Marshall: 'It sounds like your mom and dad are having a party'."
"Simon: 'Mom's not home'."
"It was a great weird kids' show, but some of the gags they managed to sneak in were hilarious."
- rick_blatchman
"I work w a dude whose daughter was on that show, We were just randomly chatting and he was telling me how she had done some modelling/acting when she was little"
" 'you probably dont know the show but...'."
" 'like hell i dont that show was great'."
- cyzad4
Early Edition
"Early edition- get tomorrow's newspaper today"
- cmoney1142
"I loved that show! What a concept!"
- MortLightstone
"Omg omg omg"
- TumorYaelle
"Quality 90s tv, right there. A warm-fuzzy show."
- DustBunnicula
Herman's Head
talking marge simpson GIFGiphy"Anyone remember Herman’s Head?"
- ClemofNazareth
"It had the woman that does the voice for Lisa Simpson and the woman that went on to play Ross' exwife on friends was one of the characters in his head."
- rhett342
" It has 2 Simpsons voice actors- Yeardley Smith and Hank Azaria. I seem to remember that they were offered the roles- and maybe the whole show existed? - because they didn’t want to be ‘just’ VA’s, and FOX wanted to placate them."
- mr_oof
"That’s a real show?? They reference it on 'only murders in the building'.”
- Bebosherry
"I came for this one too!"
- whitemest
The Garry Shandling Show
"The Gary Shandling Show. No, not the Larry Sanders Show - Gary Shandling Show. Even the theme song breaks the fourth wall."
- MrNegativity78
"This is the theme to Gary's show, the opening theme to Gary's show. This is the music that you hear as you watch the credits. We're almost to the part of where I start to whistle, then we'll watch It's Gary Shandling's Show."
- OGREtheTroll
"Yeah, Garry Shandling and Tracey Ullman are pretty much tied up in my memory."
- Handleton
"Best theme song EVER!"
- 2WheelFotog
"My partner LOVES the theme to that show! Plays it in the background every now and then, it's a riot!"
- FuzzyChrysalis
Wonderfalls
"Wonderfalls"
"Mid-2000s show on Fox that was apparently too weird even for Fox. I think they canceled it halfway through the 1st season."
- l8apex
"I have the DVD. Excellent show that I still toss in every once in a while."
"The producers had planned out some storylines all the way to S3. The S2 cliffhanger was supposed to be Jaye being sent to the mental hospital where she had helped put away some guest stars, including the woman who tried to kill the therapist with gift store items, and the boy who bought the russian mail order bride."
- DonnieJuniorsEmails
"Bryan Fuller's early work."
- bottledgoose
Mary Hartman Square
"Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman"
- Phuni44
"I remember watching this with my dad and my sister after the 11:00 pm news. I was in like 6th grade. That's what happens when there's no mom around. 😂"
- PJKPJT7915
"Her husband fell into a vat of paint thinner at work, and he needed to have plastic surgery over every inch of his body, so he requested to look like Tab Hunter."
- GuncleShark
"I thought her husband drowned in a bowl of soup. Maybe her first husband? That show was trippy af"
- Phuni44
"Her neighbor's husband. The clip is on YouTube."
- bitb
"Spin off of a spin off or Mary Tyler Moore as I recall, right? Wasn't Rhonda the first spinoff?"
- [Reddit]
"Not a spin-off. Mary Hartman was a very bizarre show for its time, a parody of a soap opera. Louise Lasser played Mary, and she was this weirdly detached character surrounded by crazy drama and violence. I think it might have been the first place I saw Martin Mull."
- rickpo
Terranova
"Terranova, ran for like a single season then disappeared"
- codyl0611
"I loved that show! So annoying they didn’t get a second season."
- LizHylton
"I was a young kid when it aired on TV so i dont remember much of it, but I recall it being a recurring topic with my mom every now and then"
- codyl0611
"oh god I’m old. I thought it was only a few years ago. I just looked it up and it was 11. Excuse me while I go get an AARP application."
- LizHylton
"It’s that old?! Holy sh*t, grab me an application too, please. It seriously felt like just a couple of years ago."
- KhaleesiXev
Room 222
"Room 222"
- HealthyTruck5691
"Karen Valentine was probably the cutest girl ever on a tv show. I used to love when she would be on the original Hollywood Squares."
"I'm old."
- Bartlett3313
"She was the only reason anyone watched that show."
- 7decadesofhistory
"I loved that show! My mom, my sisters and I would watch that show every Friday night. The cast was really good — Karen Valentine was a really cute and bubbly teacher, and Michael Constantine was great as the high school principal"
- CelticDaisy
Eureka’s Castle
"Eureka’s Castle"
- ofmiceandmodems
"Yes! I swear this was the first one I thought of! And Under the Umbrella Tree!"
- highmaintenancemama
"If you have the Paramount streaming app, it's on there!"
- vk2786
"Spicy, salty, sour, sweet, bring us something good to eat!"
- RoseyDove323
"I’m in my late thirties and still vividly remember the Christmas special episode where Magellan gets lost in the woods."
- doopcat
"Eureka’s Castle was the jam!"
- Vernon1031
"Euuu-reeekaas castleeee"
"*Worms going err errrr ER err ere rrr*"
- Ertuu1985
Let's talk about the shows nobody remembers but you.
Are they those early childhood favorites? Or maybe a teen-drama that only got one season before Netflix pulled it, crushing your hopes and dreams of resolved plotlines about a teenage ghost band who died of poisoned hot dogs and the incredibly talented, but heartbroken, young singer who gives them a new lease on life, love, and music?
No that is not a joke and YES I am still angry about Netflix not giving Julie and the Phantoms a second season.
Maybe it's a soap opera you think you remember watching with your mom, but maybe it was a fever dream?
Whatever it is, we want to hear about it.