10. Impatience doesn't pay

"Someone in my town crashed into a telephone pole and took out the power. The road was closed off while things were sorted out. One lady decided she couldn't take the long way home and crashed into the same telephone pole. She was arrested for drunk driving."

Asecyre

9. Not a math wiz

"I was on a ride-along. Guy gets pulled over, hands his brother's ID to the officer. It is not a good match. Officer asks him when he was born. He gets that one right. Asks him how old he is. He's off by two years. He's being put in the car and the officer says 'You're the first guy I've arrested for bad math.'"

geopolit

8. Lesson not learned

"Work for a smaller county. Last fall we got a group of people coming me down from a nearby city to rob a hemp farm, thinking it was weed growing along the highway. Several of the crack team of bandits where arrested and lodged. The kicker is it was explained explicitly how dumb it was, that you can't even get high of the stuff, but the very next weekend they came back down and tried to pull it off again. Only this time the farmer was home and ended up holding them all at gun point till we arrived."

jrh41485

7. This guy was long gone

"I arrested a guy who continually called 911 asking police to bring him weed and a cheeseburger. He then proceeded to eat the foam padding of my roll bars in the back seat. I've never seen someone trip so bad."

Plot-twist-time

6. This proud defendant

"Not me, but my grandma was a lawyer. She had to defend someone who stole from a store in a city in Hungary around midnight. The only reason they got caught was because they used some matches to light up the place, and that set the fire alarm off. As if that wasn't enough, a few weeks later in court, my grandma tells the judge to look at the kid, how young he was and that he couldn't have been strong enough to break open the door or carry something outside and steal it. At this point the defendant stands up, points at his muscles and shouts 'hell yeah I could!'. That's basically when my grandma gave up. As far as I know he got a few months in prison."

TheKingofTerrorZ

5. The mistaken thief

"Underage 'kid' (he was 20, I think), who has been drinking and still has the beer on him, decides he's hungry. He goes into a mini mart and hides the beer in his pocket so that no one knows he's been drinking.

Goes to buy his snacks and the clerk notices that this kid has tucked extremely noticeable beers into his pocket. Clerk calls the cops and tells them that the kid was shoplifting beer.

The cops actually believed the kid's story but arrested him anyway for underage drinking. He spent the night in jail."

Cosmic_Shipwreck

4. Hand sanitizer is a treasure

"There was a news story in Denmark recently. A guy had stolen the customer hand sanitizer from a pharmercy after he picked up his prescription drugs. Because of his prescription they easily identified him. Police called him and asked him to return it. He refused so they had to pay him a visit, seize the hand sanitizer and also arrest him."

J_hoff

3. Don't just slap people, cop or not

"My dad once got arrested because he didnt believe the cop in civies was a real cop. So he slapped him. Turns out he really was a real cop..."

always_doing_nothing

2. Drove right up to a cell

"Not a police officer or a lawyer but someone I went to school with took MDMA and then decided to go for a drive and the police tried to pull him over and he tried to escape ran like 8 red lights and crashed into a prison of all places"

jake_griff100

1. They start younger and younger...

"I used to work at a juvenile detention center. We had a local police department bring in a ten year old boy for hitting his house with a broomstick."

doctorwhoobgyn