Women aren't your objects.[rebelmouse-image 18348617 is_animated_gif=
Therefore they clearly have feelings about how they are spoken to, and all you men are about to get a lesson on it.
u/Pepperwoodchronicles asked Reddit:
Women of Reddit, what's the best, non-creepy way to approach a woman that you don't know but are interested in?
Here is what they came up with.
One[rebelmouse-image 18351187 is_animated_gif=
- approach her in a place where she won't feel like she's being cornered. Other people around, casual setting, etc. An empty train car probably isn't your best bet.
- be friendly and engage in at least minimal small talk before asking her out, for her number, etc. Literally asking 2 seconds into the conversation can be weird, because even if we know your intent right away, you haven't given us any time to feel out the situation and feel comfortable.
- Don't be demanding. Just ask if she is interested, and do not be forceful about it if she rejects you.
- Go in understanding that some women don't like being approached by strangers, period. You might be good looking, funny, and friendly and she still might be uncomfortable or uninterested
- I know this is hard to execute in practice, but just don't be too weird about it. Don't treat her like a foreign species or a piece of meat, just like a normal person.
Two[rebelmouse-image 18351188 is_animated_gif=
Wait until you're in a place where it's appropriate. Bar, coffee shop if she doesn't have headphones in or is reading. Ask if you can join her. Talk about something interesting.
Three[rebelmouse-image 18351189 is_animated_gif=
If this is someone you see regularly, smile. If she returns the smile, say hi.
Let the conversation flow.
Do take a hint if she's not interested.
Four[rebelmouse-image 18351190 is_animated_gif=
Whether she is someone you see frequently or not I suggest being short and sweet. Obviously get to know her a little so you're not complete strangers, but you should give that no more than 5-10 min and leave it off with asking for her number and then proceed to text her the next day and ask her out if you still want to. Don't ask her anything super personal but find out what she likes to do around town and use that as a way to help you ask her out.
From my experience, I get so annoyed when a guy just wont leave and basically turns our first time we meet into a date, so definitely don't overstay your welcome.
Five[rebelmouse-image 18351191 is_animated_gif=
Every person is different and can't be approached the same way, but the one thing across the board is pay attention to whether or not you think she WANTS to be approached. If they have headphones in at all, what their body language is telling you (not making eye contact, turned away, etc), if they're busy and trying to get something done.
It makes the difference between me categorically ignoring you and also being annoyed or possibly even scared depending on context, or at the very least making friends.
And if you are rejected for any of those reasons or different ones, just remember that you or anyone else don't have the right to someone's time and attention just because you want it. Don't take it personally and move on and leave her alone.
Six[rebelmouse-image 18351193 is_animated_gif=
The guys I remember the most fondly had very casual conversation starters and transitioned smoothly into asking my name. Don't start with "Hey, I'm so and so" or "What's your name?" It catches me so off guard.
Try mentioning something that doesn't have to do with her specifically. When you approach me, I'm trying to assess the situation, determine if you're dangerous, examine my surroundings, and figure out what your intentions are. I don't want to be doing all of this while answering questions about myself, even if it's just my name.
Also, read that body language. Make a little eye contact and smile. And then read her body language and make sure she's not already creeped out or on guard.
For instance, if you're in line at Target or something, smile and read her body language. Then mention something about your surroundings or the store: "I always come in here for a specific thing and end up leaving with 30 things I didn't need and forget the one thing I came here for." Every girl at Target can sympathize with that. If she doesn't say anything, don't push it. She's not into it. If she seems good with the conversation, just make small talk in line and then give her your number.
NEVER FOLLOW HER OR WAIT FOR HER IN THE PARKING LOT. That is creepy. We are constantly told how dangerous parking lots are so you immediately come off as a threat.
Seven[rebelmouse-image 18351194 is_animated_gif=
Don't corner or confront them. Don't ask personal information off the bat. Compliment their outfit, hair, makeup, or something they have control over and not their body or face (don't objectify). If they they're doing something (reading, listening to music, shopping, etc.) leave them alone. If they ignore you, leave them alone. Realize that they probably get unwanted attention all day long and might not want to talk.
Eight[rebelmouse-image 18351195 is_animated_gif=
Don't approach them as someone you are interested in, approach them as someone you want to make friends with. Start with "hello" or a wave, and then try making a friend. If you don't want to make a friend, you are not worth getting to know.
Nine[rebelmouse-image 18351197 is_animated_gif=
Approach her casually in a public place and compliment something she has control over (i.e. clothes, hair, makeup, etc) and use words like "cool" "awesome" or "rad". Nobody is intimidated by compliments like that.
Also if someone isn't interested, just accept it and respect their space. There is no excuse to bother someone in their own time if they aren't interested
Ten[rebelmouse-image 18351198 is_animated_gif=
I hate when men come up to me and say "hi, what's your name? I just wanted to introduce myself...blahblahblah". It's fine but that has never resulted in me having an awesome connection or giving my number out. It just feels forced. Like I know we haven't met, that's why your introducing yourself. Be confident. If you notice she's watching the game say "oh don't tell me you like the xyz team" or if she has an interesting looking drink ask her what it is. If she's looking at the menu tell her they make killer nachos. If she doesn't want to talk, she won't. If she's interested you'll start talking and at the first lull that's when you can tell me your name/ask me mine/etc. I don't want to hear the standard question list. Show me you can actually talk to me and you're fun to be around.
Eleven[rebelmouse-image 18346568 is_animated_gif=
Striking up a conversation about a mutual interest sometimes works. The thing is you have to be genuine. Strange guys approach single women all the feckin' time and feign interest when the real message is, you're good enough; I'd do you.
Take an interest in her personality, in her tastes. Relate to her as a human being. She may shut you out for any of a thousand reasons and she doesn't owe you an explanation, but once in a while a woman might decide that you seem fun and interesting.
That being said, women tend to be less on guard when there's an introduction through mutual friends or if the two of you belong to the same club.
Twelve[rebelmouse-image 18351200 is_animated_gif=
honestly? the same way you would approach a dude you simply wanted to have a conversation with.
Thirteen[rebelmouse-image 18351201 is_animated_gif=
If I am on the street, just don't approach me. Period. I live downtown and I have received death threats after engaging with strangers.
Make your introduction light, and if shes not feeling after a couple of seconds, wish them a good day and leave. If you are engaged with a women for at least 30 seconds and shes not feeling it, I guarantee shes has thought of an exit strategy already.
Give her space to talk, so if she does want to leave, she doesn't have to wait for you to finish speaking or interrupt you.
Just giving a woman freedom to leave a situation makes a huge difference really.
Fourteen[rebelmouse-image 18345369 is_animated_gif=
Don't forget this quote:
"Men are afraid that women will laugh at them. Women are afraid that men will kill them."
Fifteen[rebelmouse-image 18351202 is_animated_gif=
Seriously, can this post become a sticky somewhere on some sub? I'm happily married, but when I was single I was terrified of approaching women and avoided doing so because I thought they didn't like when guys did that. I feel like this is what the other half of what the Me Too movememt is missing. Sexual misconduct needs to be brought to attention, and men need to be educated on what is appropriate behavior with regard to interacting with women. I can tell you right now that SOME men legitimately don't know any better when it comes to respecting women. Bravo to OP for posting this.
Sixteen[rebelmouse-image 18351203 is_animated_gif=
Friendly small talk. Don't corner me. Take no for an answer. Ask if we can get coffee sometime.
Seventeen[rebelmouse-image 18351204 is_animated_gif=
Also, if it's out in public, bear in mind she's probably on her way to do something- going to work, meeting a friend, trying to catch a train, making an appointment, etc... so if she ignores you or brushes you off, it might not be you, specifically. I'm often harried when I'm out and about, or otherwise very focused on what I'm trying to get done, and a random person trying to talk to me is more like a gnat buzzing around my ear. I might not even really notice someone is trying to talk to me until 10-20 seconds later, and I've already walked off. I've been called all manner of horrible things because I more or less ignored someone trying to talk to me. Well, I'm not going to turn around and talk to you NOW. Remember that she's not there purely for your benefit, so be polite.
Eighteen[rebelmouse-image 18351206 is_animated_gif=
Worst pick up I've ever seen; a coworker sat at the bar all night and grabbed (yes, grabbed) the arm of every remotely attractive girl that walked by, licked his lips, and said "I have been watching you all night." He struck out 10/10 times.
Best pick up I've ever seen; kinda doesn't happen that way. Work on you, make friends, and be open to something happening naturally.
Nineteen[rebelmouse-image 18346555 is_animated_gif=
I was sitting at a train station once and a guy walked up to me kind of slowly and disarmingly and said, "so before I embarrass myself, can I ask if you have a boyfriend?" He said it confidently in a light tone, with a warm smile, but without a trace of arrogance or entitlement. I did have a boyfriend, and when I told him I did he was respectful and left me alone. But before he walked away I made sure to tell him that he did that the right way and it was the first time I felt flattered when approached by a man I don't know, ever. I high fived him and we got on our separate trains. It's okay to say stuff like, "so I have no idea how to do this" as long as you're saying it in a friendly way and with some confidence. Honesty is disarming and endearing. You can even approach her and ask her that question. Say something like, "I don't know the best way to do this, but..."
Most of all, if she gives any indication she wants to be left alone (like if she's wearing headphones and/or reading a book), just leave her be. I wasn't wearing headphones when this guy walked up to me, but I am always super annoyed if I'm reading or listening to music and someone approaches me to hit on me. I might be having a bad day and not want to talk to anyone, I might be trying to quell an imminent anxiety attack, or any number of other things that would make me want to be left alone. Read her physical cues and if she looks closed off, it's usually on purpose. Respect that. Also don't corner her, stand a few feet away when you first speak to her so she can see that you're out of striking distance and feels less threatened. Even if the guy in question would never, ever harm anyone, we still feel more comfortable being approached by someone we don't know if we're out of their arms' reach.
Twenty[rebelmouse-image 18351207 is_animated_gif=
Read the situation and the environment. If you see her walking down the street don't approach her, let it go. If you're in a coffee shop, university, or place where people gather you can simply walk up to her and give her a compliment. If you're at a club, there's this idea of us thinking you solely look at the exterior so what guys may interpret as "b**** face" is just our faces of knowing you only came up to us because of it. A bar is a more open environment. It's easier, just don't follow us to the bathroom or anything odd like that. In a park, have a pet or a reason to be there that makes you more approachable.
If she isn't interested or appears scared, just let it go. There was this one guy on 3 occasions who pestered me for my number (friends of a friend of a friend). We feel trapped and we don't want to come off as mean, but we are not obligated to give you our numbers. rant over
I don't see the appeal of these rooms.
Why would one enjoy being trapped in a room?
When you watch people trapped in a movie you cheer for their release.
But this activity has gotten super popular.
And people have gotten real creative in their escapes.
Redditor CaptainCatButt wanted to hear confessions from the great escapes. They asked:
"Escape Room employees, what's the weirdest way you've seen customers try and solve an escape room?"
I haven't tried these rooms yet. Not sure I want to. Highly claustrophobic. Convince me...
"I used to work at one. I can’t tell you how many people thought that power outlets were a prop and tried to stick keys into them. Guys. There was a lamp plugged into it and a 'do not touch, not a part of the game' sticker on it. It’s not a trick, don’t do that."
"A friend of mine works for an escape room and he told me one about a puzzle where the key to the next door was shackled to a desk by a combination lock. What you are supposed to do is figure out the combination for the lock from the clues around the room to free the key. What one group decided to do instead was get a guy on each corner and pick up the 150 pound desk and carry it across the room, slide the key into the lock, and then rotate the entire desk to unlock the door."
"I am not an escape room employee but I did a lot of em and talked to the employees often. One of them told me there was a simple lock (opened by a key) that had 'Yale' written on it (the name of the lock company) and a lady (not native English speaker) thought it read 'yell' and legit shouted 'OPEN!!' at it, expecting it to open."
searching the fountain...
"Recently went to an escape room with my co-workers. Before we started, we were explicitly warned not to touch or drink the bright blue water coming out of a fountain because it would turn our skin blue - clearly people had tried searching the fountain as part of the escape room previously and now they have to warn everyone."
Voice of GodWhos That Voice Of God GIF by Shark WeekGiphy
"I was in an escape room once where one puzzle involved some objects that needed to be manipulated inside a structure that made it very awkward."
"We were all looking at it trying to figure out how to proceed when I said 'Well, the bottom is held on with screws and I have a screwdriver in my purse, but that would probably be cheating.' Instantly the Voice of God came over the intercom 'THAT WOULD BE CHEATING!' So we didn't do that..."
Well people really do get creative at this game... don't they?
"Had a group of engineers who were familiar with the style of the lock effectively reverse engineer the lock. They showed us how they did it afterwards."
"When I was in one they told us several times that the fire extinguisher is NOT part of the puzzle. They said it so many times, I'm 98% sure someone once used it lol."
"I always wait to see if they say not to disassemble smoke detectors, if they have that warning, I ask about it, and every time they will always have a story about a dumby who ignored the warning labels and disassembled the smoke detector."
Group of 4
"There was a story on here a while ago about a guy in a group of four who took a broom from the first room because 'it had to be for something.' He said it looked too out of place to not be needed. Well he was half right. It was out of place but that's because it was the broom used by employees to clean the room."
"It was simply forgotten when they cleaned last time. The guys giving hints thought it was hilarious that this guy carried a broom through four rooms expecting it to be the key to their escape at some point. I thought that was funny as hell."
"Take in a screwdriver and dismantling furniture or taking doors off hinges... all the while we specifically tell them not to use force and that furniture is just furniture. Though I don't care cause they gotta pay the damages. Also had some groups press our panic button cause that opens all the doors (for emergency cases)."
"So they can skip puzzles and be faster. Makes zero sense to us cause they are paying for an hour of playtime and to solve puzzles, not like the prize is reduced cause you solved less in fewer minutes. Especially since our prices aren't cheap."
IdiotsIdiot Facepalm GIFGiphy
"Breaking EVERYTHING. Trying to eat or drink things they should totally not be trying to eat or drink."
Even though there are a million ways to escape, I'm still gonna pass. My claustrophobia won't allow it.
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Different cultures are fascinating and add color to our world.
While many cultures should be celebrated, there are some individuals who just can't help but reserve their opinions about those whose behavior and customs differ vastly from their own.
At the risk of coming off as offensive, some might even call these customs, "weird."
European culture got the spotlight when Redditor CoffeeBoy88 asked:
"What is something weird about Europe that Europeans don’t realize is weird?"
Apparently, there's never a dull moment in European nations.
"German tourists are OBSESSED with mooses."
"The UK has 30 accents per square mile. And if a large man calls you duck in Stoke … that’s okay."
"Norwegians don't close their curtains when it gets dark."
"The amount of mosquitos in Finland, Americans go crazy in Spring because of it."
Redditors discuss what it's like traveling around Europe.
Come And Go As You Please
"How incredibly inconsequential it is to cross country borders. Cycled through France - Belgium - Netherlands and there is barely even a sign."
"You drive five hours in the US: you’re basically still in the same place."
"You drive five hours in Europe: everyone’s talking funny and the cheese is different."
The Short Commute
"The first time I was in the UK my husband wanted to go to Wales and I looked at the train route from London and was like 'It’s all the way on the other side of the country! We’re only in the UK for a week. We don’t have that kind of time!' And my husband was all, 'you know it’s a 2.5 hour train ride, right?' I thought it would all day."
Germans In Transport
"the absolute lack of air conditioning even at 40°, german transport gets sticky and stinky quite fast and nobody seems to care, many people even shut the windows to avoid the 'annoying breeze.'"
Maintaining distance was a thing long before pandemic measures recommended people to be socially distanced.
All About Respect
"Finnish people are silent, small talk doesn't exist. Their personal space larger than COVID-19 social distancing rules, and it's considered normal. Don't speak unless spoken to, and don't invade other people's personal space - it's seen as a sign of a respect."
"Those Finns, who haven't been to abroad or haven't met too many foreigners, don't often even recognize this behaviour being unusual in the global scale."
The "Safety Coffee Cup"
"I'm from Finland and one European thing that all Finnish people hate is cheek kisses when greeting. Its mostly southern european thing but still. There is this saying in Finland that goes 'Everyone has their own safety coffee cup' meaning the closest distance someone should get to you should not be closer than your coffee cup when you're holding it."
Let Them Shop In Peace
"Weird at first but I appreciate and wish for it. It might be just a Germany thing but from what I’ve been told German Walmart failed because the North American style of customer service was very unliked. From the greeter at the door to clerks asking if you need help unprompted. German shoppers just want to shop and go home as undisturbed as possible."
I remember being weirded out when I went to Paris and asked for some ice at a cafe.
The waiter served me coke by opening the room temperature can and poured some of the contents into an empty glass. With no ice.
When the server came back, he had with him a spoon with one ice cube on it. I thought it was stingy but it got worse.
He poured the rest of the coke over the ice on the spoon he was holding and then walked away with the ice and spoon.
I guess the coke was colder than when I had my first sip, so according to the server, it was viola: mission accomplished!
Do the French not like ice-cold beverages? Weird.
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Just because a therapist is there to expertly evaluate our emotional challenges throughout many of life's adversities and crises, it doesn't mean they always hold it together.
People tend to forget that therapists–the professional we seek for guidance when we're vulnerable–are also human and are just as prone to feeling the feels.
Curious to hear from therapists who've exposed their emotional vulnerabilities in front of their clients opened up when Redditor Unkw0n_pers0n asked:
"Therapist that have cried in a session, why?"
A patient who feels seen and understood reinforces why therapists endeavor to help people in the first place.
It Wasn't Her Fault
"I was working with a deeply depressed client who had a lot of negative self talk about how she was always a failure. We were exploring the origins of this and how young she was the first time she felt self-blame. She told me her earliest story of when she was in 2nd grade."
"Afterwards, as we were processing it, I expressed that 'it wasn't your fault' about the story. She just broke down sobbing and said 'nobody has ever said that to me before' in between sobs. It hit me and I cried a little."
"i cried after i worked with a kid who described an emotionally difficult situation with a sibling. the kid’s experience aligned very similarly to something i went through with my own sibling when i was the kid’s age and i hadn’t realized how much hurt i was carrying from the experience."
"being a therapist sometimes means being confronted with things you didn’t realize had such a strong impact on you. luckily, i have a stellar therapist of my own that i can work through these moments with."
The Patient With A Disorder
"I was doing a cognitive assessment for a girl. We were doing tests and at one point she started crying she was unable to tell me why, she was fine just one moment before. I let her collect her thoughts, then she said softly 'I don't want to be more stupid than my friends'. She wasn't actually, she was very bright, but she didn't know that she has dyslexia, dysorthograpy AND dyscalculia. I realized that she went through THIRTEEN years of school without help. Her parents didn't want to do an assessment as they thought she was just lazy. I told her that she was very brave to decide to get help and things would get better after our assessment and I felt tears in my eyes."
"Edit: first of all, I have great empathy for parents, for most of all is just a matter of ignorance, fear and parenting is hard. If you are a parent and you see your kid struggling, PLEASE listen to professionists, we are here to help, not judge, and we will find ways to help you and your kid. Disorders don't go away, don't underestimate it, the sooner you get help, the better the outcome can be. It's ok to be scared but we're here for you and we understand you."
"Second, I'm really sorry to read so many heartbreaking stories about people that weren't believed and struggled being undiagnosed. I wish you all the best, I hope you are in a better situation and you got or you'll get all the help you deserve, because you do deserve it."
"Third, if you think 'something's wrong with me', get help if you are in a position to do so. Worst case you understand yourself better and have a chance do make peace with parts of yourself."
A patient who has already accepted their heartbreaking fate recalls seeing their therapist getting emotionally involved during a session.
A Mother Who Didn't Want To Let Go
"My therapist cried while 'mediating' a discussion between my mom and I. I have a neurodegenerative disease and she is my full time caregiver. Because of my severe disability, she also has legal guardianship of me, even though I am in my 20’s (this is all fine with me, I need the help, and I agreed in court to all of it. This was the first true 'disagreement' that we ever had.)"
"I am ready to die. I am in pain, unable to do anything for myself, and it’s only getting worse. I asked my mom to sign a DNR, because I have been resuscitated before, it was a mess, and I don’t want it to happen again."
"She refused. She doesn’t want to lose her child and wanted to do everything medically possible to keep me alive."
"The session was essentially me begging her to let me go, while she sobbed and said she could never sign a paper that would lead to my death. It was a terrible situation. No one was 'the bad guy', no one was trying to hurt the other. It was someone wanting their suffering to end, verses a mother not wanting to lose her child."
"My therapist agreed that I should be allowed to make this choice, but certainly didn’t think my mom was manipulative or evil, just already grieving and trying to hold on to me as long as possible. I saw her wipe her eyes several times, and they were red by the time we were done. She actually hugged us both at the end."
"The situation wasn’t resolved during the session, but my mom came around shortly after. She wouldn’t sign the DNR, but gave me legal permission to do so (so, in her mind, it wasn’t her making the final decision.)"
"BTW, my mom and I have a GREAT relationship! This was just one issue that we couldn’t come to an agreement on ourselves. But it worked out, and I’m now in palliative care and have a great team looking after me, INCLUDING my mom!"
The following examples continue to demonstrate how therapists are more emotionally invested in their patients and clients than you think.
Responding To Tragic News
"I cried in a substance treatment group. A client’s mom had reached out via email to me to say that her daughter died from an OD. She called during my group so I chose to take the call and spoke with her briefly. I thought I could continue with the group. Ended up in tears instead."
She Patient Who Felt Unloved
"My patient cried and said 'there's nobody on this planet who loves me anymore.' I cried when I left because I knew she was right. For context: she was 95, her husband and son had died, she had a personality disorder that made her behaviour unbearable for her environment after her husband died and every person still in her life were paid for to be around her. She died a few months after this conversation."
It is unsurprising that therapists are compassionate people.
Otherwise, they wouldn't be in the room to help someone who is struggling internally.
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Much of the nation continues to reel from the news that a leaked draft opinion indicated the Supreme Court's ruling on Dobbs v. Jackson Women's Health Organization will move to strike down Roe v. Wade, the 1973 landmark decision that protects a person's right to choose reproductive healthcare without excessive government restriction.
Many people remember what it was like in the days before women could seek an abortion; many innocent women died in the absence of proper medical care or were forced to birth children they could not afford, trapping them in poverty.
But could a ruling overturning Roe v. Wade signal the loss of other rights in the future, especially those decided on the right to privacy, on which Roe was hinged?
People shared their thoughts with us after Redditor thisiscubes asked the online community,
"Americans of Reddit, what are your thoughts on Roe v. Wade being overturned by SCOTUS as per draft reports?"
"It was the single most traumatizing..."
"I used to be pro-life for the most part but felt abortion was necessary in certain situations (i.e. rape, incest, whatever). I thought I would have never had an abortion myself. I thought I could always give up the baby for adoption."
"Until I gave birth last month. It was the single most traumatizing experience I've ever gone through. I'm healthy and my pregnancy was not complicated but my heart stopped working after getting an epidural. I coded."
"Once they got me stabilized again, my baby then starting decompensating. They literally had to rip him out of me because I was too far along to convert to C-section."
"I still can't control feces leaking out of me, even 6 weeks later. What a quality of life improvement /s."
"I wanted this child so having my body absolutely wrecked for the safety of my child seemed worth it, despite the pain and complications I experienced from it."
"But now, having gone through that, I cannot imagine any woman being FORCED to go through what I went through. Against their will. So I’m pretty pro choice now."
We are so sorry you had to go through that. We agree that giving birth can be harmful and traumatic, even for a wanted child, and no woman should have to go through that.
"I am currently..."
"I am currently in an OB triage hospital room waiting for a shot of methotrexate, which is considered an abortion."
"This pregnancy was so wanted. I had a miscarriage in February. I wanted this baby. But it is ectopic and it will kill me. And I am still crying so hard."
"My doctors have been amazing and caring and made this process so much easier. F*ck anyone who thinks the legal system needs to be involved here."
We are so sorry you have to go through that. It’s none of the government’s business.
"Roe wasn't the start of abortions. It was the end of women dying from abortion."
We can't clap enough for this one.
"Get our your wallets..."
"You think our social services are overwhelmed now. Get out your wallets because there is about to be a generation of babies born where moms won't have the means to feed, clothe, and care for them."
Sadly, this is all too true. It is a crisis in the making.
"My cousin had to terminate..."
"I had an abortion at 21 that saved my life. It was a terrifying and isolating experience, and the best decision I have ever made."
"My cousin had to terminate her pregnancy in the second trimester due to the fact that the fetus developed without a brain. She described the care she received as what kept her alive through her grief."
"If abortion was not an option, she would have had to carry to term."
I’m sick to my stomach over this. Women, especially women of color, are going to die."
Sadly, the statistics are on your side on this. Many women, especially women of color, are going to die, and many children will grow up impoverished.
"Scared. I work with survivors of sexual violence. I am a survivor myself. I, and many other folks, have had our bodily autonomy stolen from us before. To see it on a federal level is horrifying."
It is indeed frightening and survivors of sexual violence no doubt feel victimized alll over again.
"My daughter will never have..."
"As a woman, I will be legally lesser than males because I have a womb. My daughter will never have full autonomy over her body. Intersectionally speaking, women of color and under resourced women will bear the brunt of this. Nothing will change for white women of means."
White women of means can fly wherever they wish and get an abortion there. That will never change.
"The foster care system is proof the government doesn’t care about unwanted children yet want to force more to be born. It’s all politics though guarantee if any of them ever got in a sticky situation illegal or not an abortion will be had available."
The United States' welfare system is also awful and that seems to be by design.
"My wife had a miscarriage last year. Because we were well past the point of most miscarriages (not quite to the stillbirth cutoff, but not far away), we were told the odds of my wife passing the fetus on her own were slim and that surgery was the safest option."
"We were required by law to acknowledge in writing that the procedure would terminate the (dead) fetus and that it came at risk of infertility and death. Our doctor was required to tell us the developmental age of the (dead) fetus and which developmental milestones occur around that time, as well as offer us an ultrasound to see the (dead) fetus."
"We cried the entire time. We desperately wanted this child. Our doctor cried, apologizing every step of the way that we had to go through this insensitive BS on top of losing the pregnancy."
"This fetus was dead in every sense of the word but because the procedure in question is also used for abortions we had to jump through these goddamn hoops to avoid putting my wife's health at risk."
"And it's not like my state doesn't offer alternatives for nonviable fetuses, conception due to rape or incest, or instances where health is at serious risk. This WAS the alternative. If we were actually getting an elective abortion it would have been significantly more time consuming and soul-crushing. You literally have to take an online course."
"Abortion access in this country is already a joke. All this is going to do is get people killed."
This is a heartbreaking story and we are sorry that you and your wife had to go through that.
As you can see, overturning Roe v. Wade has significant consequences. While the actual opinion will not be released until the summer, it's safe to say that the United States is entering a new era and that an entirely new wave of activism has begun.
Have some thoughts of your own? Feel free to share them with us in the comments below!
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